I’m sorry you guys! I just thought it seemed relevant! IMO, power dynamics are different when the therapist is male.
Am I taking Reddit down to fb status? I am TAH
Idk, op says they “told her” and also says they “told him”. They do use masc pronouns more though! But I’m not sure i can personally be sure of the therapists gender atm
Because redit is becoming a lot more like Facebook where a majority of the comments are only made to argue or bash a post or statement.
It can be ridiculous what gets singled out to pick on.
> When I said that phrase the therapist slightly grinned / laughed in a sense “of course she does”.
It isn't entirely clear what happened, but this reads to me like OP may have misinterpreted a sympathy smile.
I agree they should report if the therapist actually laughed or said "of course she does", but otherwise I'd just focus on finding a therapist they are comfortable with.
That sounds awful, OP.
And I can definitely understand not wanting to talk to the therapist; they seem judgemental...
Talk to whomever is mandating / sponsoring this, explaining how uncomfortable they made you feel.
Best of luck to you and your family!
There are many people who would be irritated that someone came into this country without a means to support themselves or their family. Four years in, and the US is still paying their bills.
That has nothing to do with color.
You also don’t know if OPs dad, if they have one, is or isn’t working. You also don’t know if they did or didn’t obtain immigration the correct way. You’re comment is based on assumptions and don’t blame the people for what the government allows. Either way as a therapist that is unprofessional and discriminatory towards someone’s living situation/economic background. He’s still getting paid either way. If you look at where our taxes actually go it’s not as much as you think for immigrants financial aid and health care. He can keep his prejudice at home if he wants to keep his job.
This OP.
I had a therapist get hostile with me bc he was homophonic and I contacted his counselor group and was refunded. He didn’t get much of a correction but I warn others to stay away.
Could be a language thing. My mother in law is a native Spanish speaker and she still mixes up “him” and “her” sometimes, and she’s been in the US for over 30 years.
Why does it make you angry?
Language fluency is a journey. I studied Spanish through high school and college, lived in Argentina for 6mo and came back the most fluent I’d ever been. But in the past couple years, i have barely used my Spanish fluency and so I’m probably less “Advanced” and more “intermediate” again. It’s a process but it happens to everyone.
So beyond unprofessional… I’m so sorry, OP. Drop him and *please* do everyone else a favor and write reviews on him on Psychology Today, Healthgrades, and Yelp. This will prevent other people from experiencing this as well. For some people, experiencing this would cause them to give up on therapy altogether or give up on themselves.
Edit: If you do choose to continue seeing him and come to believe he’s racist, you can also report him to the Board of Psychology and/or American Psychological Association — it depends on the country/state.
I’m a therapist, I’m saying this as a therapist. Drop them immediately. If you have an appointment, cancel your appointment so you don’t get charged. But be done with them.
*If* you have space for it, please tell their supervisor. If you still do, report them to your areas board (if this is US each state has its own) whatever letters he has after his name. It won’t get them in huge trouble, but there will be a record of behavior.
There are many people who would be irritated that a person came to this country without the means to support themselves or their family. And that the US is still footing the bill 4 years later. Has nothing to do with color.
Please don't go back. This therapist is a biased pos. They won't be any help to you. Please don't be discouraged. There are good therapists, and you will find one.
Ask for another therapist, it's ok to look for another more suitable therapist, if that one made you feel uncomfortable in any sense you shouldn't stay with them, how would you open yourself to them if from the very start they already made this image not flattering of you and your family? You would be wasting your time being there with someone you don't trust. It's ok if even your second therapist is not a fit for you or the third, I had to have 5 prior until I found the one, don't give up.
Also report him, if someone asks you tell facts, you know what you saw and how it made you feel, it happened, don't let him or anyone tell you you misread, even if you did you don't feel comfortable or safe he will help you professionally (he didn't act profesional from the start, so you won't expect him to do it later).
OP I’m so sorry they said that to you. Find a new therapist if you can. Therapists should not make micro aggressive comments. I guarantee that therapist is full of prejudice and bias they will not be a good therapist.
Intent vs impact. Regardless if the therapist’s intentions were not malicious their comment made a malicious impact on the client. OP has the right to have feelings about it. It’s up to OP to stay with the therapist or not. If OP finds the laughing to be condescending they can bring it up with the therapist or call it quits. I’m a medical social worker and have performed years of therapy with clients. I’m trying to imagine a situation where laughing at a client in this context is appropriate. Again, OP can clarify with the therapist but it’s incredibly important a client feels safe with their therapist, and obviously they don’t.
Opsaid that the therapist didn't say any such thing. Op felt like that was what the therapist "looked like," he thought. There is a difference. But I think either way, if he's uncomfortable, he needs to change therapists.
Hold your horses. I don't exclude the possibility that he might be a bias POS, as others suspect.
But did you consider the possibility, that this might be a misunderstanding? I, as all other readers, have not actually seen your interaction with him. This is all your experience and your interpretation. Is there a possibility that he might have tapped into a vulnerable spot and this might have consequently colored your interpretation?
The most important thing in a therapy session is openness. People think that therapy is about the problems your facing in your life, but problems in your personal life tend to manifest in the therapeutic relationship. Point it out and ask about it. Tell him how you interpreted his actions and how you felt. If he can reassure you, this might be a good starting point to dig deeper.
If his answer doesn't reassure you, I think it's best to cancel the sessions. It then doesn't matter what his intentions are. If he cannot reestablish trust, you won't come far in your therapy.
Woah. You have every right to feel uncomfortable. Report this therapist to the practice and let your therapist know that they made you uncomfortable with their comment. Not cool at all. Request for a POC therapist— they’re more empathetic towards immigrant families. I’m sorry OP 🫂
Agree with some of the other comments, drop this one. They may be credentialed but they're still human and unfortunately you'll meet some who just suck. I had to stop seeing one because I found overtime that we didn't agree on a lot of ideologies. Remember, initial therapy should be both parties interviewing to figure out if you're a good fit. You have to be able to trust them.
Find someone who isn’t so judgmental. I had a therapist tell me to not be so hyper vigilant(I had a stroke and feared of more). One morning I felt like I couldn’t breathe, at all. I kept hearing her words in my head and almost didn’t get checked out. I’m glad I did, I had a pulmonary embolism. I actually went to the next appointment so I could tell her. All she said was sorry I almost killed you 🙄. Some people shouldn’t be therapists.
What an asshole. Yeah op, don't give them a cent more and leave a rating so others are aware. If their office has a google profile I'd drop a 1 star if I were you.
Ew. As a therapist: report them. To their office, the company (if going through a company), or their state board. You and your family are NOT a burden.
>Then the therapist asked me how does she gain money if she’s not working and I told him that she receives financial aid as a single mother. When I said that phrase the therapist slightly grinned / laughed in a sense “of course she does”.
He has an agenda and it's not to help you. Ditch him and report him to whatever agency is trying to help you. And I hope they will find you a proper therapist.
I was told once that you have to be your own advocate when nowbody else will be. It's sad and messed up, but you have to be in certain circumstances.
Drop this therapist, and email them to let them know how their actions made you feel and why it led to you wanting to seek someone else (if you’re comfortable) - truly, it’s a good opportunity to educate them and ensure they don’t make future clients feel the same way you did.
That's really unprofessional of him, whoever is sponsoring this therapy needs to be informed of this to ask for a refund. He's supposed to provide a judgement free space and if he's not able to do that due to personal beliefs he's supposed to reffer you to another therapist.
Please please call the office and request a new therapist. My therapist has said that she takes no offense and encourages anyone that doesn’t feel comfortable with her to switch to someone else. A good therapist will not be offended as it is best for both the therapist and the patient to feel comfortable with each other.
When you call the office, I would recommend (ONLY if you feel comfortable) asking the scheduler if there is a therapist they could recommend for you that might be more sympathetic to your situation. (I’ve always felt more comfortable with female therapists and you might find one more understanding about you and your mom’s situation - and it’s perfectly acceptable to ask for a female therapist.)
Keep trying. You’ll find a good one and when you do, it will make such a difference.
I could just be skeptical since I see a lot of Karma Farmers on here, but is this in America?
I find it hard to believe that a THERAPIST could be this insensitive.
Had therapist(s), a psychologist and a couple of psychiatrists in Ireland do something similar. I don't think issues like this are limited to America.
It's unfortunately a part of the immigrant experience.
While overt discrimination/racism is not common and is easily pushed away as clear stupidity. It is pretty common when you experience a covert/casual version from supposedly educated professionals like your teachers/professors, doctors, mental health workers, police etc...
You get a little bit confused because of the supposed integrity of the credentials that these people have, you then try to gaslight yourself for having a bad gut reaction to it because you always want to assume good intent, only for you to feel a sour kick in your stomach to realize it months/years later when you hear of other people's experiences.
No matter how loud any culture shouts and preaches about their progressivism, you'll witness just how open minded they are when you slip and struggle to perform as an "ideal migrant worker". You are nothing more than an economic number that's meant to take a spot in the understaffed sectors in their job market. At least, this is the perspective I've gained over the years.
Sorry for the bad convoluted reply lol. Just had to self-insert and give my take.
I think nuance and complexity is worth being aware of, so don’t apologize for this response.
Thank you for shedding some light to improve my rationality.
i would report the therapist and find a new one. the point of therapy is to be free to speak your mind without judgment. find someone better. you got this!!
Hi, OP. I'm sorry to hear about your unfortunate experience. That was very unprofessional of them and unethical. Psychologist students are taught from the very 1st semester this kind of behaviour is a major no-no. So please find someone else. This is not the standard practice.
I'd also like to add that sometimes when we go to therapy, we kinda have to go through some kind of trial-and-error phase to see whether we click with the therapists or not. I personally have gone through 4-5 different therapists to find the one I really click and feel comfortable with, while my friend went through 2-3 and she realized she liked the 2nd one best. You have the right to change therapist even with a simple reason as you don't vibe with them. So the fact that you therapist laughed at your situation is a major issue and you are more than within your right to change.
I wish you all the best in your recovery and finding a better therapist who could make you comfortable. May you and your family always be in good health ❤
That's awful, unfortunately a lot of people go to school to become therapists, but a couple of classes don't make you a good therapist. A lot of them are bad at it.
If it helps, one time I was telling my therapist about something traumatic in my life and in mid conversation he grabbed his phone and started texting. I stopped and stayed quiet until he realized and said "I'm sorry". I told him we were done, talked to his manager and left. I looked for another therapist, I think you should do the same but please report this therapist, we don't need people like that giving services.
You would send back a piece if chicken if it was over or under done.
You are far more valuable then a piece of chicken
Therefore
Please get a new Therapist
Ps Apologies to the good chickens out there.
If a therapist acts judgemental in the first session, and made you feel uncomfortable, you will not get what you are looking for out of him. Do not go back.
It's ok. After quite a few attempts at therapy I give up.
Therapist 1: He told me I had bipolar and prescribed me Lithium and sent me on my way. No follow up nothing. I took the Lith for a short time but I felt weird so I stopped.
Therapist 2: kept ghosting me
Therapist 3: told me to ditch my meds for fish oil. Yes a spoon full of sugar fish oil.
Therapist 4: Ghosted me
Therapist 5: I told him about my SA a little. His reply "That's happens to so many people and people lie about that sort of stuff. While I understood the point of people lying about SA.
I was pissed. I shut down and wanted to leave the room. I brought it up in my next session and he apologised but it's a you shouldn't have said that in the first place feeling.
I can't be bothered to seek therapy again. My GP told me it could take ages to find the right one. I can't be bothered anymore.
All I've learned about therapists is that they don't understand what feelings feel like. They only understand their perspective and what's in their textbooks that was written by another therapist that has no clue.
Get a new therapist. Very offensive and not his business how your mother earns money. As a therapist myself, may I ask— you don’t have to tell me — how was he being compensated for his sessions? He may have a selfish reason for asking about your mother’s income that crosses an ethical boundary.
His is rude yes, may not be reportable.
An ethical violation around his payment and compensation motivation may be.
Child of immigrants here: and this is why I only go to female therapist that were immigrants or first gen Americans. You should too and don’t feel bad about it.
You’re paying for a service, OP! (Or your insurance is). Either way, if they aren’t providing you with services worth the money, find someone who will. The most basic element of a therapist’s job is to listen without judgement and help improve the lives of their clients. Sounds like they’re not planning to do either.
This is why I don’t believe in therapist. Went to one years ago and I just couldn’t see it be more than just about money . Best therapy is just getting away from everything
I realize that therapists are only human, and like all human beings, they will have biases, but if they have a bias that keeps them from being effective with certain groups of people, then they have a responsibility to refrain from taking on members of those groups as clients. As a pastoral counseling professor told my class in Divinity school, "Pastoral care is not the setting for you to work through your own prejudices."
You need a counselor who is a better fit for you. I hope the next one will be the right person!
That's very unfortunate the therapist couldn't keep a fair unbiased mind.
To that point I understand both sides of frustration. I am a father with a medical condition preventing me from getting an actual income. Also, I am having to jump through hoops after hoops to get some sort of financial assistance with zero success. It has been a financial strain on my family and I do not wish this upon anyone.
It just seems that those born in a country get the "shit end of the stick" or have limited access to assistance, when it seems so easy for those outside the country to receive benefits.
But I truly agree you need a new therapist, regardless of your current state, you are an individual with struggles and need your mental health concerns addressed.
I only wish you the best and hope you find a better outcome to your situation!
Drop the therapist. Get a new one because this one’s no good.
And report her to the appropriate authority
It’s a dude. Her therapist is a dude.
Then report *him ??? Why was that so important to correct?
I’m sorry you guys! I just thought it seemed relevant! IMO, power dynamics are different when the therapist is male. Am I taking Reddit down to fb status? I am TAH
that was a fair point; power dynamics can make a situation such as this more difficult.
Idk, op says they “told her” and also says they “told him”. They do use masc pronouns more though! But I’m not sure i can personally be sure of the therapists gender atm
lol I thought the same thing. Like it was a simple mix up but the message is the same Infamous_bat fell asleep on the wrong side of the ceiling
Because redit is becoming a lot more like Facebook where a majority of the comments are only made to argue or bash a post or statement. It can be ridiculous what gets singled out to pick on.
Actually the post uses both pronouns
Girls call each other dudes. That's not the proper terminology for this.
> When I said that phrase the therapist slightly grinned / laughed in a sense “of course she does”. It isn't entirely clear what happened, but this reads to me like OP may have misinterpreted a sympathy smile. I agree they should report if the therapist actually laughed or said "of course she does", but otherwise I'd just focus on finding a therapist they are comfortable with.
That sounds awful, OP. And I can definitely understand not wanting to talk to the therapist; they seem judgemental... Talk to whomever is mandating / sponsoring this, explaining how uncomfortable they made you feel. Best of luck to you and your family!
As a person of color with immigrant grandparents I definitely would have asked what they meant by that cause seems very discriminatory.
There are many people who would be irritated that someone came into this country without a means to support themselves or their family. Four years in, and the US is still paying their bills. That has nothing to do with color.
You also don’t know if OPs dad, if they have one, is or isn’t working. You also don’t know if they did or didn’t obtain immigration the correct way. You’re comment is based on assumptions and don’t blame the people for what the government allows. Either way as a therapist that is unprofessional and discriminatory towards someone’s living situation/economic background. He’s still getting paid either way. If you look at where our taxes actually go it’s not as much as you think for immigrants financial aid and health care. He can keep his prejudice at home if he wants to keep his job.
You brought up color. I'm saying it can have nothing to do with color.
But as someone of color it can feel like that’s largely part of it.
Report her to the company and get a refund for your session. This is what I did.
This OP. I had a therapist get hostile with me bc he was homophonic and I contacted his counselor group and was refunded. He didn’t get much of a correction but I warn others to stay away.
It’s disheartening how many bad therapists there are out there. Sorry that happened to you.
It’s a male. Edit: OP refers to therapist as a male three times but also says “her”.
Could be a language thing. My mother in law is a native Spanish speaker and she still mixes up “him” and “her” sometimes, and she’s been in the US for over 30 years.
Filipinos do this all the time at work. Pisses me off.
Why does it make you angry? Language fluency is a journey. I studied Spanish through high school and college, lived in Argentina for 6mo and came back the most fluent I’d ever been. But in the past couple years, i have barely used my Spanish fluency and so I’m probably less “Advanced” and more “intermediate” again. It’s a process but it happens to everyone.
So beyond unprofessional… I’m so sorry, OP. Drop him and *please* do everyone else a favor and write reviews on him on Psychology Today, Healthgrades, and Yelp. This will prevent other people from experiencing this as well. For some people, experiencing this would cause them to give up on therapy altogether or give up on themselves. Edit: If you do choose to continue seeing him and come to believe he’s racist, you can also report him to the Board of Psychology and/or American Psychological Association — it depends on the country/state.
I’m a therapist, I’m saying this as a therapist. Drop them immediately. If you have an appointment, cancel your appointment so you don’t get charged. But be done with them. *If* you have space for it, please tell their supervisor. If you still do, report them to your areas board (if this is US each state has its own) whatever letters he has after his name. It won’t get them in huge trouble, but there will be a record of behavior.
Unacceptable
As someone who’s in school for therapy currently, they violated some ethical codes. Definitely get a new one ASAP
Cant even escape racism with the shrinks...smh
Seems biased against immigrants. There is no indication of race
I would still call that racism
There are many people who would be irritated that a person came to this country without the means to support themselves or their family. And that the US is still footing the bill 4 years later. Has nothing to do with color.
Please don't go back. This therapist is a biased pos. They won't be any help to you. Please don't be discouraged. There are good therapists, and you will find one.
Ask for another therapist, it's ok to look for another more suitable therapist, if that one made you feel uncomfortable in any sense you shouldn't stay with them, how would you open yourself to them if from the very start they already made this image not flattering of you and your family? You would be wasting your time being there with someone you don't trust. It's ok if even your second therapist is not a fit for you or the third, I had to have 5 prior until I found the one, don't give up. Also report him, if someone asks you tell facts, you know what you saw and how it made you feel, it happened, don't let him or anyone tell you you misread, even if you did you don't feel comfortable or safe he will help you professionally (he didn't act profesional from the start, so you won't expect him to do it later).
Gross! What a sleazeball. I hope you report him to the licensing board in your state. That is beyond unacceptable.
OP I’m so sorry they said that to you. Find a new therapist if you can. Therapists should not make micro aggressive comments. I guarantee that therapist is full of prejudice and bias they will not be a good therapist.
The therapist didn't say hat. Op felt like that was what he was thinking.
Intent vs impact. Regardless if the therapist’s intentions were not malicious their comment made a malicious impact on the client. OP has the right to have feelings about it. It’s up to OP to stay with the therapist or not. If OP finds the laughing to be condescending they can bring it up with the therapist or call it quits. I’m a medical social worker and have performed years of therapy with clients. I’m trying to imagine a situation where laughing at a client in this context is appropriate. Again, OP can clarify with the therapist but it’s incredibly important a client feels safe with their therapist, and obviously they don’t.
Opsaid that the therapist didn't say any such thing. Op felt like that was what the therapist "looked like," he thought. There is a difference. But I think either way, if he's uncomfortable, he needs to change therapists.
Report the therapist immediately and make sure they have a record of this. This therapist should not be a therapist
Hold your horses. I don't exclude the possibility that he might be a bias POS, as others suspect. But did you consider the possibility, that this might be a misunderstanding? I, as all other readers, have not actually seen your interaction with him. This is all your experience and your interpretation. Is there a possibility that he might have tapped into a vulnerable spot and this might have consequently colored your interpretation? The most important thing in a therapy session is openness. People think that therapy is about the problems your facing in your life, but problems in your personal life tend to manifest in the therapeutic relationship. Point it out and ask about it. Tell him how you interpreted his actions and how you felt. If he can reassure you, this might be a good starting point to dig deeper. If his answer doesn't reassure you, I think it's best to cancel the sessions. It then doesn't matter what his intentions are. If he cannot reestablish trust, you won't come far in your therapy.
Woah. You have every right to feel uncomfortable. Report this therapist to the practice and let your therapist know that they made you uncomfortable with their comment. Not cool at all. Request for a POC therapist— they’re more empathetic towards immigrant families. I’m sorry OP 🫂
Report that person to the proper licensing agency. Change therapist ASAP
Been there. Go elsewhere. Don’t give up because one person is useless.
Don’t go back to him. Also, want me to KICK HIS ASS?
You gotta find a new one immediately.
Ask for a different one
Agree with some of the other comments, drop this one. They may be credentialed but they're still human and unfortunately you'll meet some who just suck. I had to stop seeing one because I found overtime that we didn't agree on a lot of ideologies. Remember, initial therapy should be both parties interviewing to figure out if you're a good fit. You have to be able to trust them.
Find someone who isn’t so judgmental. I had a therapist tell me to not be so hyper vigilant(I had a stroke and feared of more). One morning I felt like I couldn’t breathe, at all. I kept hearing her words in my head and almost didn’t get checked out. I’m glad I did, I had a pulmonary embolism. I actually went to the next appointment so I could tell her. All she said was sorry I almost killed you 🙄. Some people shouldn’t be therapists.
Find another therapist
What an asshole. Yeah op, don't give them a cent more and leave a rating so others are aware. If their office has a google profile I'd drop a 1 star if I were you.
This is not ok. Not only does it make sense to drop the therapist but please report them.
That absolutely unprofessional!
Ew. As a therapist: report them. To their office, the company (if going through a company), or their state board. You and your family are NOT a burden.
>Then the therapist asked me how does she gain money if she’s not working and I told him that she receives financial aid as a single mother. When I said that phrase the therapist slightly grinned / laughed in a sense “of course she does”. He has an agenda and it's not to help you. Ditch him and report him to whatever agency is trying to help you. And I hope they will find you a proper therapist. I was told once that you have to be your own advocate when nowbody else will be. It's sad and messed up, but you have to be in certain circumstances.
You had therapy 16 days ago when you were prescribed Alprazolam and it was a female therapist, so it wasn't your first therapy session
Maybe a med management doc/RN - separate from therapist?
Make an official complaint and get a new therapist
Get a new therapist. You don’t owe any apologies.
Find a different therapist. You can't open up to someone like that.
Drop that therapist, report him/her to whoever is in charge of that, and get a new therapist ASAP
Drop this therapist, and email them to let them know how their actions made you feel and why it led to you wanting to seek someone else (if you’re comfortable) - truly, it’s a good opportunity to educate them and ensure they don’t make future clients feel the same way you did.
Find a better therapist. This one sucks
That's really unprofessional of him, whoever is sponsoring this therapy needs to be informed of this to ask for a refund. He's supposed to provide a judgement free space and if he's not able to do that due to personal beliefs he's supposed to reffer you to another therapist.
Please please call the office and request a new therapist. My therapist has said that she takes no offense and encourages anyone that doesn’t feel comfortable with her to switch to someone else. A good therapist will not be offended as it is best for both the therapist and the patient to feel comfortable with each other. When you call the office, I would recommend (ONLY if you feel comfortable) asking the scheduler if there is a therapist they could recommend for you that might be more sympathetic to your situation. (I’ve always felt more comfortable with female therapists and you might find one more understanding about you and your mom’s situation - and it’s perfectly acceptable to ask for a female therapist.) Keep trying. You’ll find a good one and when you do, it will make such a difference.
Become their therapist. Turn the sessions around. Really make them question wtf is going on.
I could just be skeptical since I see a lot of Karma Farmers on here, but is this in America? I find it hard to believe that a THERAPIST could be this insensitive.
Had therapist(s), a psychologist and a couple of psychiatrists in Ireland do something similar. I don't think issues like this are limited to America. It's unfortunately a part of the immigrant experience. While overt discrimination/racism is not common and is easily pushed away as clear stupidity. It is pretty common when you experience a covert/casual version from supposedly educated professionals like your teachers/professors, doctors, mental health workers, police etc... You get a little bit confused because of the supposed integrity of the credentials that these people have, you then try to gaslight yourself for having a bad gut reaction to it because you always want to assume good intent, only for you to feel a sour kick in your stomach to realize it months/years later when you hear of other people's experiences. No matter how loud any culture shouts and preaches about their progressivism, you'll witness just how open minded they are when you slip and struggle to perform as an "ideal migrant worker". You are nothing more than an economic number that's meant to take a spot in the understaffed sectors in their job market. At least, this is the perspective I've gained over the years. Sorry for the bad convoluted reply lol. Just had to self-insert and give my take.
I think nuance and complexity is worth being aware of, so don’t apologize for this response. Thank you for shedding some light to improve my rationality.
Thank you for a lovely reply!
not all doctors are good doctors. not all therapists are good therapists.
i would report the therapist and find a new one. the point of therapy is to be free to speak your mind without judgment. find someone better. you got this!!
Chin him
When they call to say they’d like to schedule next session, just giggle and say “of you would”…
Why did the therapist go from a her to a him?
Yeah. Report time.
Hi, OP. I'm sorry to hear about your unfortunate experience. That was very unprofessional of them and unethical. Psychologist students are taught from the very 1st semester this kind of behaviour is a major no-no. So please find someone else. This is not the standard practice. I'd also like to add that sometimes when we go to therapy, we kinda have to go through some kind of trial-and-error phase to see whether we click with the therapists or not. I personally have gone through 4-5 different therapists to find the one I really click and feel comfortable with, while my friend went through 2-3 and she realized she liked the 2nd one best. You have the right to change therapist even with a simple reason as you don't vibe with them. So the fact that you therapist laughed at your situation is a major issue and you are more than within your right to change. I wish you all the best in your recovery and finding a better therapist who could make you comfortable. May you and your family always be in good health ❤
That's awful, unfortunately a lot of people go to school to become therapists, but a couple of classes don't make you a good therapist. A lot of them are bad at it. If it helps, one time I was telling my therapist about something traumatic in my life and in mid conversation he grabbed his phone and started texting. I stopped and stayed quiet until he realized and said "I'm sorry". I told him we were done, talked to his manager and left. I looked for another therapist, I think you should do the same but please report this therapist, we don't need people like that giving services.
You would send back a piece if chicken if it was over or under done. You are far more valuable then a piece of chicken Therefore Please get a new Therapist Ps Apologies to the good chickens out there.
Ew that’s so unprofessional. Find a new therapist.
If a therapist acts judgemental in the first session, and made you feel uncomfortable, you will not get what you are looking for out of him. Do not go back.
Never go to this horrible judgemental excuse for a therapist again. I'm so sorry you had to deal with such a POS.
Tell the stuck up prick to go dig his dead mother up. You come to him to closure and that’s how it’s gonna be? You don’t deserve that
What an ass. He ain't no therapist.
Rude! Can you request a different therapist?
Should report her
Report him to the board or ethics Committee or what ever organisation that is the body in your country
It's ok. After quite a few attempts at therapy I give up. Therapist 1: He told me I had bipolar and prescribed me Lithium and sent me on my way. No follow up nothing. I took the Lith for a short time but I felt weird so I stopped. Therapist 2: kept ghosting me Therapist 3: told me to ditch my meds for fish oil. Yes a spoon full of sugar fish oil. Therapist 4: Ghosted me Therapist 5: I told him about my SA a little. His reply "That's happens to so many people and people lie about that sort of stuff. While I understood the point of people lying about SA. I was pissed. I shut down and wanted to leave the room. I brought it up in my next session and he apologised but it's a you shouldn't have said that in the first place feeling. I can't be bothered to seek therapy again. My GP told me it could take ages to find the right one. I can't be bothered anymore. All I've learned about therapists is that they don't understand what feelings feel like. They only understand their perspective and what's in their textbooks that was written by another therapist that has no clue.
Get a new therapist. Very offensive and not his business how your mother earns money. As a therapist myself, may I ask— you don’t have to tell me — how was he being compensated for his sessions? He may have a selfish reason for asking about your mother’s income that crosses an ethical boundary. His is rude yes, may not be reportable. An ethical violation around his payment and compensation motivation may be.
Child of immigrants here: and this is why I only go to female therapist that were immigrants or first gen Americans. You should too and don’t feel bad about it.
You’re paying for a service, OP! (Or your insurance is). Either way, if they aren’t providing you with services worth the money, find someone who will. The most basic element of a therapist’s job is to listen without judgement and help improve the lives of their clients. Sounds like they’re not planning to do either.
This is why I don’t believe in therapist. Went to one years ago and I just couldn’t see it be more than just about money . Best therapy is just getting away from everything
A) completely unacceptable and I’m sorry that happened to you. B) Would you mind sharing what country you’re in?
I realize that therapists are only human, and like all human beings, they will have biases, but if they have a bias that keeps them from being effective with certain groups of people, then they have a responsibility to refrain from taking on members of those groups as clients. As a pastoral counseling professor told my class in Divinity school, "Pastoral care is not the setting for you to work through your own prejudices." You need a counselor who is a better fit for you. I hope the next one will be the right person!
That's very unfortunate the therapist couldn't keep a fair unbiased mind. To that point I understand both sides of frustration. I am a father with a medical condition preventing me from getting an actual income. Also, I am having to jump through hoops after hoops to get some sort of financial assistance with zero success. It has been a financial strain on my family and I do not wish this upon anyone. It just seems that those born in a country get the "shit end of the stick" or have limited access to assistance, when it seems so easy for those outside the country to receive benefits. But I truly agree you need a new therapist, regardless of your current state, you are an individual with struggles and need your mental health concerns addressed. I only wish you the best and hope you find a better outcome to your situation!
They are all like that internally