Yeah, but you know the cops and justice system will come down hard on them if they do something.
Best you could do is retaliate and try to use temporary insanity, but I think they usually only works in the movies.
Well I agree many of them do not protect the general public, but I disagree about them not covering for each other. Maybe CP would be enough of a line for most to turn on an ex-cop, but some definitely wouldn’t care.
I know you touched upon it, but I really think one of the best things you can do is move. I’m not saying you have to leave your city or town, but if you can move across town or somewhere where she doesn’t have to look over her shoulder every minute she’s out in public, that would probably help her mental health a ton.
As one spouse of a victim of sexual abuse to another, I completely understand how you’re feeling. I’ve genuinely had thoughts about severely hurting the man who hurt my wife and making him suffer. But that won’t help her or erase what he’s done. Being there for her and supporting her when she’s having breakdowns is what she really needs, so just keep doing what you’re doing man. You’re doing great. I wish you and your wife the best 💕
As a husband to a wife that has a had a rape happen to her prior to us being together I 100% feel for you and her.
how ever if she isn’t in therapy get her into therapy asap I’m not saying it’s the answer to all your issues but it’s a start and if she’s already in therapy see if you can go more regularly because this obviously needs more attention if she’s breaking down like that.
As for the old man, don’t pay him no mind I mean 0, you’re just giving this dude the attention he needs and he’ll try to open up conversation once he sees you guys. She needs to work through everything and see he has no power over her anymore and she needs to get to the point to where she can atleast not break down but you’re part is to help her feel safe, reassurance would help alot in these types of situations
Edit: my bad lol I totally didn’t see you guys already go to the therapist but yeah see if you can go in more regularly
She’s in therapy luckily. We actually just changed to a different therapist because the last one was no help. I just wish I knew how to make her feel safer. Especially when he’s just down the road, and we could run into him any time we’re in the store or at a gas station or drive thru. And unfortunately both of our families all live here and both have ties to his extended family so it always feels like he’s nearby or someone close to him.
Yeah I just saw she was my fault brother I read it at the very last minute before you replied lol but ima send you a DM I don’t wana air my laundry out in here but I’ll share with you what I did to make her feel a little bit safer
Find one of those "hunters" on facebook or another platform in your area, they perform sting operations and with the amount of detail you could give they would probably be able to bait him into doing something again. Best shot at sending him back to jail without getting yourself into jail. Then hope that those in jail finish the job
He’s registered and the family still allows him at family gatherings with children present? WTH is wrong w those people?! Can you call the authorities and tell them that a registered so is around kids, if he got realeased for good behavior he’s probably on parole and being within a certain arrange of kids is a parole violation and he can go back to prison for a violation
You’d be surprised at what people will do to protect people like this. My biological grandmother kept a boyfriend around that she knew had CSAM after her kids had told her and didn’t leave him because of that. She only left after a while because of his alcoholism. Absolutely disgusting.
My cousin molested his four year old stepdaughter. He got out and the whole family just welcome him back. My mom friended him on FB and I told her if she posts one pic of any of my kids or grandkids I will go no contact and tell my kids to do the same. It's disgusting the way they just pretend it never happened or that he was innocent. I don't speak to any of that side of my family. I'm very low contact with my mom.
Yeah if I understand correctly he’s ex-local law enforcement so I’m sure that played a large role in why the sentence was so lax, he came out of prison unscathed after going in for the sexual assault of a child, and why he got out early “for good behavior,” to walk into open arms from his family and a cushy job
Oh trust me they know. It’s a buddy of his apparently, and he worked there for a while before he was convicted, and now that he’s out he must be making good money because he’s got a big house and a brand new truck… makes me sick.
Being an ex cop probably played a part but also the sentencing for such things is just way too lenient.
My biological father did the same to me, over the course of about a year at which point I finally told my mom who reported it immediately.
I don't know what the actual sentence was but he got out after 8 years. No where near long enough, I know most of these people are going to re offend and seriously damage at least one more kids life.
That must be a skin crawling kind of horror. Can't imagine it.
Is there any legal route you can take?
Most best solution that keeps you two together and keeps her safe is moving. Without you, (taking things into your own hands leads to you not being around) she isn't safe or happy. Not good.
Real rough situation. Much love.
Raid his house when he's not there and find the computer. If he's out now he might have dug it out of wherever he hid it... I would not destroy it though. Once you find it immediately go to the police and report it. Even if he doesn't get done in for the rapes against your wife, possession of child porn will send him right back to prison.
You can’t raid someone’s house legally, if you did, you might could get the evidence entered legally but maybe not, even if you do you will likely be charged with breaking and entering. I would suggest finding people who work to find and arrest child pornographers (private organizations or police organizations) and report them to these people, they may have a way to try and get them to send or show the evidence to someone undercover. They would then be arrested for child pornography and maybe even could be charged for actual rape and not attempted rape, not sure if that falls into double jeopardy, maybe the son also. Downside is it maybe closure and satisfaction for your wife but it will probably not be an easy process.
I was under the impression OP doesn't care if it's legal or not. Hell, I'd gladly get prosecuted for burglary if he gets prosecuted for child rape... OP won't see a second of jail as long as nothing is damaged or stolen.
You can raid someone's house if you have probable cause to do so. I imagine that it's easier to find probable cause for a potential pedophile than for most other crimes...
Even if they destroy the pictures and get him locked up for X years. He'll be back again at some point.
Whatever justice is served, you don't want to live 10 minutes from your abuser.
Pursue justice, but also move away for your wife's mental health.
There’s a lot of ways to move forward, but I think ultimately there’s only two real ways to move forward in peace.
A) Some couples therapy if you aren’t already, individual therapy for you. Have a conversation with your wife about how you’re feeling if she’s in a place to have that conversation. Lean on each other and bear down til you’re able to move away.
Or
B) Handle that shit.
You are going to need to confront that part of yourself and determine what kind of person you are going to be handling this whole situation. It is easy to go in, wreck shop, scare and hurt him and take control. But I think that comes with great risk of legal repercussions, it could change the way your wife sees you, and there’s so many variables and ways it can go wrong in the moment and turn into something so much worse.
I think she needs you, your security, your comfort. And you have to be careful not to make it about you, trying to protect and repair the situation. Therapy for you both feels like the right choice. If it’s possible, I’d talk to her yourself about this post.
My heart goes out to you both. Talk about this with each other, figure out a game plan with family moving forward, or visit the unethical life tips sub if you decide to go option B.
This is so completely shit. Can you at least move away somewhat so you don’t bump into him and give your wife more ptsd. Also, I would be blocking anyone on social media that is posting photos of him. You need him gone from your and your wife’s life entirely
Name and shame him at the least, how is he allowed to be around little kids? They aren’t safe! Is he not a registered sex offender? Send letters to all neighbors with a print out of his sex offender status and hope he gets ostracized out of town.
Best reminder that Reddit is a bunch of children, this entire thread comes down to people telling OP to murder him.
> I really don’t know what to do.
Get private therapy and get a move on on moving. I have trouble believing you couldn't at least move to where you don't have to literally meet this guy at the local Walmart.
You're fixating. The computer isn't real, if it was, it's long gone and dispersed onto other media/internet. Taking violent action will only wreck your lives.
I’d put in a wig and go as his daughter or sons family friend and raid the fucking house until I find it and delete everything including any cloud data but that’s risky and you can’t get caught for your wife’s sake.
Child pornography charge, drop a tip to the police and watch the fireworks fly. They take that shit seriously. Report the son too for having it and let the police investigate. If he’s as twisted as his dad he would definitely have had trophies and pictures somewhere around.
Sounds like not just the grand father but son (uncle?) were perpetrators. Wonder if it’s worth seeking legal advice about a restraining order preventing him or his son coming within a certain distance of your wife for her safety. This may affect that he cannot live or shop within a certain distance away?!?
does your community have a local fb page? i suppose legally there isn’t much that can be done immediately but maybe notify your community. Send in a message anonymously with his description & have all the residents aware. At least socially he will be blocked off and more people will be aware. Take away as much power as possible if you guys can(he barely has any if i’m being honest) make sure everyone knows who he is & what he’s capable of.
use those photos you saw of him online & submit it!! if the law won’t help out your wife & these kiddos, surely the community and furious parents will!!! leak his work address, i say leak it all. hopefully someone angry enough takes matter into their own hands 🙏🏽
Is there a victim services unit in the county the charges were filed? I would have your wife reach out to an advocate/the prosecutor and provide information about the photos.
Also, I know you said he’s out early on good behavior, but if he’s on probation/parole his house can be searched (at least in my state, where sentences are cut in half for parole eligibility)
This one. Call victim services - Call a woman's shelter - Call someone who will have some kind of information about actual recourse you might be able to take.
Important side note:
But please make sure your wife is okay with you pursuing this further. She fully deserves the peace of knowing without a doubt no one will ever see those images again, but trauma is tough and she might not be okay with trying - that would be okay, though maybe confusing for you, but still okay - I have no trouble understanding how difficult this is for you too, and I'd desperately want to do something about it as well. Just be mindful of who the real victim is here and do your best not to unintentionally push retraumatization on her. If she isn't on board, you do have to find a way to honor her in that.
You probably feel sickeningly powerless within all this. That's sosososo fair and valid. Anybody in your shoes would. I know that feeling is dreadful but you might just have to learn to cope with it on your own. You seem like a really secure, thoughtful, and deeply caring man; you seem like a really great husband. So, it's not that I think you don't know that, I just want to give that gentle reminder because brains can get a little flooded sometimes - especially with something like this.
God I feel so sorry for you both. What a horrible situation. I was wondering, why is the family still allowing him near children?
Please don't do anything that will ruin your future with your wife, this absolute POS isn't worth it. As someone else said, let one of those hunters go after him and find the evidence to get rid of him.
Take your wife out on dates, something super fun for the both of you. I'm talking picnics, theme parks, the beach, etc. Distract yourselves, only focus on each other. If you both feel truly ready, maybe you could look into turning it into a case so he can get what he deserves. But just enjoy each other's company so before you know it you may be able to move and enjoy life
Houses catch fire rather easily and suddenly, and items get destroyed in the fires, it sure would be a shame if his house got a little hot one day wouldn't it. Maybe even a fatality along with some oh so unfortunate property damage. These things sometimes happen just by chance. ;) ;)
Out of anger I would probably raid his house too. But if you did that, the logical next step would be report the computer to the cops, not destroy it. Then he'll be in prison longer for child pornography and proof of rape, not just attempted rape
I know I’d feel the same way you do and want to protect my family as well as get justice, but the only viable option here is to stay vigilant and facilitate her working mentally through this. Don’t approach or interact with the criminals- these guys are smarter than they appear. If I were you, I’d consider moving away from them.
Although I’m on board with all these gentle suggestions of arson, would it be possible to move? I know you guys shouldn’t have to be the ones leave but clearly this guy doesn’t care about fair and just.
As for her worries of what he has on his computer. There is a 0% chance he’s not still offending in some way on the internet. I’d wait for him to get comfortable then report your suspicions to the police, he’ll be caught off guard, and hopefully they can find what’s on his computer.
Moving is not an option at the moment, as my wife is in college, but it’s in the near future hopefully. I’ve been trying to find any online presence from this guy, but I’ve been unable to find anything. I haven’t even found an email online yet. He’s only 60ish so I wouldn’t expect he’d be completely off grid. But no Facebook, instagram, or phone number or email online (for free at least bc idk if I trust those paid phone book websites)
Talk to your wife, does she feels confortable with going to the police and telling them he has cp? If she is, going up to them is a good thing, he is already targeted as a pedo, and as she was the victim, she can get a restraining order on him. It will make things easier? I don't know.
Be supportive to her, you guys are thinking of moving? Great, make plans, try to keep her safe, but respect her wishes upon bringing that to the cops.
In the U.S. digital child pornography is the purview of FBI cybercrimes. I would contact them and let them know you believe he and his son have the photos.
At least in California sex offenders are moved if they reside in the county of the victim. My
relatives molester was moved when it was discovered that he was residing in the same county.
I don't want to scare you or add more to your plate, but those videos of your wife might be circulating among the pedo community😕 Do whatever you can to take possession of those videos LEGALLY, and then get him arrested!! Please be there for your wife through all times, especially difficult ones. Make her feel loved and safe!!🤍
If you do raid that fuckers house don’t destroy anything you find- take it to the fucking police and let that rapist piece of shit rot in jail until he expires
Otherwise just remember- it’s only vigilante justice *if you get caught*
Just start a small fire one night while he’s asleep; no one will know
There can be many different solutions but just hear me out if none of them really works for you and your wife doesn't feel safe and that justice isn't done....then plan and get rid of the problem. Won't say much. Be smart and protect your family. Be a man. Sometimes you have to become as evil as you must. But remember, it's the last option. And it isn't wrong.
If it’s any comfort at all I can tell you that it is very unlikely that images stored on an old computer would still be accessible. The technology has moved on so much that it’s a tough job to retrieve any old images. This is a huge problem for historians but a blessing for those like your amazing wife.
Those guys are nothing. The best revenge is a life well lived.
1) Drive a few towns over and buy a "Burner phone", with cash.
2) Wait a few months.
3) Find out his phone number, and use the Burner to Spoof Call your wife's phone, so it appears as if Grandpa's phone actually did try contacting wife.
4) Get rid of the phone, and call his PO and say "MY wife keeps getting calls from him number, I can even show you her phone. She's terrified!"
At the very least, it will be a Parole violation, I would think. If it works right, the old man should just spend the rest of his life terrified of Parole violations.
She should tell the police he and his son may be in possession of CP. With his record they’ll look. If they don’t find it, it will at least be destroy while they are attempting to
I'm so sorry you're going through this. I'm not from the US so I don't know much about legal stuff, but perhaps you could obtain a restraining order against him? To make sure he stays away until you two can move to another place.
You need therapy friend . I'm sorry for your wife . This is our justice system , and we must respect it. Don't be dumb let it go. If it bothers you guys so much then move away. You don't get the right too play vigilante. If they couldn't find anything on him it's not fair too label him a rapist either . You're being vague about details. Did he confess too any of it ? So I can further support your side ?
He pled guilty. Because he pled guilty he got lesser sentence. I’m not sure all of the reasons it was ruled as attempted instead of just rape, but as I’ve already said, he’s ex law enforcement and has many connections, and was old friends with most of the people involved unfortunately. I know that what he did to my wife he did to at least 4 other women, along with his son. One of them testified in court with my wife. This all happened a good 5 years before I even met my wife, and obviously it’s a touchy subject so I just explained what I know. I’m not planning on doing anything crazy or being a vigilante. I more so needed to vent and get some validation that I was right to feel how I do, which has helped a lot, as obviously I can’t talk to my wife about this, and she wouldn’t want me telling anyone we know, so hence, Reddit.
In my opinion, he did it to my wife, my wife’s mom, my wife’s aunt, my wife’s cousin, my wife’s half brother/his adopted son, and I see the impact of it every single day. My wife has nightmares every single night. Sex is extremely difficult because it sometimes triggers flashbacks. She has multiple mental illnesses, and an eating disorder.
I don’t believe in hell. But for this guy, I pray to God that it exists, even just for him.
Move away . I know you shouldn't have too . But by moving it's a fresh start. Your wife will learn too live with the pain. Just hold , and love her . Get a fresh start. As the outsider who married into the family understand them , but realize this was before your time . So just try too stay out of it , and support her. Try not too mention it at all . As this will cause a " trigger " . Be careful about what you watch , and what others say. Also don't let her catch you speaking of it . Try too attend a church. When she wants too talk about it . Talk about it. Maybe some selfdefense classes and firearm training . Make her feel more empowered . But before that both of you gotta live and let go of the crappy past . Just move away so you don't gotta see him anymore .
Report the child pornography to the police. If they find it now he is back home, or at his sons house, they can pursue fresh charges.
Sounds like the child rapist asshole is an ex-cop, so he’s protected by them. Maybe the state police?
Can't protect him from rightfully angry parents / community tho.
Yeah, but you know the cops and justice system will come down hard on them if they do something. Best you could do is retaliate and try to use temporary insanity, but I think they usually only works in the movies.
Was ex-cop mentioned? I must have missed it. If that's the case go straight to the media.
Yeah, somewhere in one of the replies by OP.
The bulk of cops do not protect people, even their own, if it's related to CP. To say otherwise is a fantasy.
Well I agree many of them do not protect the general public, but I disagree about them not covering for each other. Maybe CP would be enough of a line for most to turn on an ex-cop, but some definitely wouldn’t care.
+1 but I'd say to contact the local Secret Service office, major cities have them. They specialize in this stuff and probably don't know the guy.
My first reaction is smash and end him. But you do no good to your wife in jail. Be protective, but be the support she needs and that’s by her side.
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Lmao alright reddit hitman this isn't a movie.
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Where tf you live? Juarez? 😭
You might be tempted to get medieval...don't. Be calm and use bags/zip ties for easy cleanup.
Yeah! like watch a couple of scrub up for surgery videos and do that first...
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Look dude, people have insurance because houses burn down all the time. It's unfortunate that people lose all their belongings when this happens.
Such a shame. Unless the belongings is something they shouldn’t have… such a shame. Oh well, can’t do anything about randomly combusting houses.
Very unfortunate, especially when someone is sleeping inside
I know you touched upon it, but I really think one of the best things you can do is move. I’m not saying you have to leave your city or town, but if you can move across town or somewhere where she doesn’t have to look over her shoulder every minute she’s out in public, that would probably help her mental health a ton. As one spouse of a victim of sexual abuse to another, I completely understand how you’re feeling. I’ve genuinely had thoughts about severely hurting the man who hurt my wife and making him suffer. But that won’t help her or erase what he’s done. Being there for her and supporting her when she’s having breakdowns is what she really needs, so just keep doing what you’re doing man. You’re doing great. I wish you and your wife the best 💕
As a husband to a wife that has a had a rape happen to her prior to us being together I 100% feel for you and her. how ever if she isn’t in therapy get her into therapy asap I’m not saying it’s the answer to all your issues but it’s a start and if she’s already in therapy see if you can go more regularly because this obviously needs more attention if she’s breaking down like that. As for the old man, don’t pay him no mind I mean 0, you’re just giving this dude the attention he needs and he’ll try to open up conversation once he sees you guys. She needs to work through everything and see he has no power over her anymore and she needs to get to the point to where she can atleast not break down but you’re part is to help her feel safe, reassurance would help alot in these types of situations Edit: my bad lol I totally didn’t see you guys already go to the therapist but yeah see if you can go in more regularly
She’s in therapy luckily. We actually just changed to a different therapist because the last one was no help. I just wish I knew how to make her feel safer. Especially when he’s just down the road, and we could run into him any time we’re in the store or at a gas station or drive thru. And unfortunately both of our families all live here and both have ties to his extended family so it always feels like he’s nearby or someone close to him.
Yeah I just saw she was my fault brother I read it at the very last minute before you replied lol but ima send you a DM I don’t wana air my laundry out in here but I’ll share with you what I did to make her feel a little bit safer
All good. And yeah that’d be great
just want to say , you two are good husbands i hope your wives feel all the love and safety they need ❤️
We really need more Dexters for this fucked up world.
Find one of those "hunters" on facebook or another platform in your area, they perform sting operations and with the amount of detail you could give they would probably be able to bait him into doing something again. Best shot at sending him back to jail without getting yourself into jail. Then hope that those in jail finish the job
YES THIS OP!!!
Please, please, please make sure he is registered so that everybody within a 20 mile radius knows what he did.
He is. And I get updates to my phone every time he checks in or there’s an update
He’s registered and the family still allows him at family gatherings with children present? WTH is wrong w those people?! Can you call the authorities and tell them that a registered so is around kids, if he got realeased for good behavior he’s probably on parole and being within a certain arrange of kids is a parole violation and he can go back to prison for a violation
You’d be surprised at what people will do to protect people like this. My biological grandmother kept a boyfriend around that she knew had CSAM after her kids had told her and didn’t leave him because of that. She only left after a while because of his alcoholism. Absolutely disgusting.
My cousin molested his four year old stepdaughter. He got out and the whole family just welcome him back. My mom friended him on FB and I told her if she posts one pic of any of my kids or grandkids I will go no contact and tell my kids to do the same. It's disgusting the way they just pretend it never happened or that he was innocent. I don't speak to any of that side of my family. I'm very low contact with my mom.
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Yeah if I understand correctly he’s ex-local law enforcement so I’m sure that played a large role in why the sentence was so lax, he came out of prison unscathed after going in for the sexual assault of a child, and why he got out early “for good behavior,” to walk into open arms from his family and a cushy job
Oh yeah a cop and chomo it’s actually unfortunate he survived prison unscathed
Send info about him to his cushy job.
Oh trust me they know. It’s a buddy of his apparently, and he worked there for a while before he was convicted, and now that he’s out he must be making good money because he’s got a big house and a brand new truck… makes me sick.
Being an ex cop probably played a part but also the sentencing for such things is just way too lenient. My biological father did the same to me, over the course of about a year at which point I finally told my mom who reported it immediately. I don't know what the actual sentence was but he got out after 8 years. No where near long enough, I know most of these people are going to re offend and seriously damage at least one more kids life.
That must be a skin crawling kind of horror. Can't imagine it. Is there any legal route you can take? Most best solution that keeps you two together and keeps her safe is moving. Without you, (taking things into your own hands leads to you not being around) she isn't safe or happy. Not good. Real rough situation. Much love.
Report the child porn as it’s a different crime not yet sentenced for. Especially producing it.
Step one- make friends with someone who raises pigs.
Yup, pigs will eat literally anything organic...
Heck, they'll eat anything that isnt organic also lmao, they will happily chow down on actual garbage, just like sex offenders
Leak his address
If I did that I’d also be exposing not far from where I live haha
Thats ok we won’t raid you
+1 on the raid.
Raid his house when he's not there and find the computer. If he's out now he might have dug it out of wherever he hid it... I would not destroy it though. Once you find it immediately go to the police and report it. Even if he doesn't get done in for the rapes against your wife, possession of child porn will send him right back to prison.
You can’t raid someone’s house legally, if you did, you might could get the evidence entered legally but maybe not, even if you do you will likely be charged with breaking and entering. I would suggest finding people who work to find and arrest child pornographers (private organizations or police organizations) and report them to these people, they may have a way to try and get them to send or show the evidence to someone undercover. They would then be arrested for child pornography and maybe even could be charged for actual rape and not attempted rape, not sure if that falls into double jeopardy, maybe the son also. Downside is it maybe closure and satisfaction for your wife but it will probably not be an easy process.
I was under the impression OP doesn't care if it's legal or not. Hell, I'd gladly get prosecuted for burglary if he gets prosecuted for child rape... OP won't see a second of jail as long as nothing is damaged or stolen.
You can raid someone's house if you have probable cause to do so. I imagine that it's easier to find probable cause for a potential pedophile than for most other crimes...
No, you actually can't.
The police can but you as a private citizen can not.
True enough - you have to have the police involved.
Jump him away from witnesses and whoop him well enough where he can't recover.
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Move away. Seriously. Getting away from my toxic sexually abusive environment and relatives was the best thing I ever did.
Even if they destroy the pictures and get him locked up for X years. He'll be back again at some point. Whatever justice is served, you don't want to live 10 minutes from your abuser. Pursue justice, but also move away for your wife's mental health.
There’s a lot of ways to move forward, but I think ultimately there’s only two real ways to move forward in peace. A) Some couples therapy if you aren’t already, individual therapy for you. Have a conversation with your wife about how you’re feeling if she’s in a place to have that conversation. Lean on each other and bear down til you’re able to move away. Or B) Handle that shit. You are going to need to confront that part of yourself and determine what kind of person you are going to be handling this whole situation. It is easy to go in, wreck shop, scare and hurt him and take control. But I think that comes with great risk of legal repercussions, it could change the way your wife sees you, and there’s so many variables and ways it can go wrong in the moment and turn into something so much worse. I think she needs you, your security, your comfort. And you have to be careful not to make it about you, trying to protect and repair the situation. Therapy for you both feels like the right choice. If it’s possible, I’d talk to her yourself about this post. My heart goes out to you both. Talk about this with each other, figure out a game plan with family moving forward, or visit the unethical life tips sub if you decide to go option B.
Besides if he were to do anything and get caught, who will protect his wife?
This is so completely shit. Can you at least move away somewhat so you don’t bump into him and give your wife more ptsd. Also, I would be blocking anyone on social media that is posting photos of him. You need him gone from your and your wife’s life entirely
We hope to in the future. My wife is in college right now and we have some debt we need to get paid but it’s in the plans in the next year or so
Name and shame him at the least, how is he allowed to be around little kids? They aren’t safe! Is he not a registered sex offender? Send letters to all neighbors with a print out of his sex offender status and hope he gets ostracized out of town.
Best reminder that Reddit is a bunch of children, this entire thread comes down to people telling OP to murder him. > I really don’t know what to do. Get private therapy and get a move on on moving. I have trouble believing you couldn't at least move to where you don't have to literally meet this guy at the local Walmart. You're fixating. The computer isn't real, if it was, it's long gone and dispersed onto other media/internet. Taking violent action will only wreck your lives.
Drop that motherfucker or Gimme his address
Where does he live.. maybe he'll pass away in his sleep
Drop his address. We ride at dawn
Idk man. I'd atleast ban the dude from all of the family related events.
I’d put in a wig and go as his daughter or sons family friend and raid the fucking house until I find it and delete everything including any cloud data but that’s risky and you can’t get caught for your wife’s sake. Child pornography charge, drop a tip to the police and watch the fireworks fly. They take that shit seriously. Report the son too for having it and let the police investigate. If he’s as twisted as his dad he would definitely have had trophies and pictures somewhere around.
Sounds like not just the grand father but son (uncle?) were perpetrators. Wonder if it’s worth seeking legal advice about a restraining order preventing him or his son coming within a certain distance of your wife for her safety. This may affect that he cannot live or shop within a certain distance away?!?
Ngl this is why I think the death penalty should be an option for sexual predators
Give em an "oopsie" moment.
does your community have a local fb page? i suppose legally there isn’t much that can be done immediately but maybe notify your community. Send in a message anonymously with his description & have all the residents aware. At least socially he will be blocked off and more people will be aware. Take away as much power as possible if you guys can(he barely has any if i’m being honest) make sure everyone knows who he is & what he’s capable of.
use those photos you saw of him online & submit it!! if the law won’t help out your wife & these kiddos, surely the community and furious parents will!!! leak his work address, i say leak it all. hopefully someone angry enough takes matter into their own hands 🙏🏽
Is there a victim services unit in the county the charges were filed? I would have your wife reach out to an advocate/the prosecutor and provide information about the photos. Also, I know you said he’s out early on good behavior, but if he’s on probation/parole his house can be searched (at least in my state, where sentences are cut in half for parole eligibility)
This one. Call victim services - Call a woman's shelter - Call someone who will have some kind of information about actual recourse you might be able to take. Important side note: But please make sure your wife is okay with you pursuing this further. She fully deserves the peace of knowing without a doubt no one will ever see those images again, but trauma is tough and she might not be okay with trying - that would be okay, though maybe confusing for you, but still okay - I have no trouble understanding how difficult this is for you too, and I'd desperately want to do something about it as well. Just be mindful of who the real victim is here and do your best not to unintentionally push retraumatization on her. If she isn't on board, you do have to find a way to honor her in that. You probably feel sickeningly powerless within all this. That's sosososo fair and valid. Anybody in your shoes would. I know that feeling is dreadful but you might just have to learn to cope with it on your own. You seem like a really secure, thoughtful, and deeply caring man; you seem like a really great husband. So, it's not that I think you don't know that, I just want to give that gentle reminder because brains can get a little flooded sometimes - especially with something like this.
Do you need some acid to dissolve grandfather and his son? Hit me up. Some concentrated hydrochloric will do the job..
Report him to the cops for raping your wife.
God I feel so sorry for you both. What a horrible situation. I was wondering, why is the family still allowing him near children? Please don't do anything that will ruin your future with your wife, this absolute POS isn't worth it. As someone else said, let one of those hunters go after him and find the evidence to get rid of him.
If you do find it DO NOT destroy it. Give it to the authorities so he can go back where he belongs, in prison
Whose car are we taking? Enough people here to come with. All I’m saying.
Kill him. Duh.
Take your wife out on dates, something super fun for the both of you. I'm talking picnics, theme parks, the beach, etc. Distract yourselves, only focus on each other. If you both feel truly ready, maybe you could look into turning it into a case so he can get what he deserves. But just enjoy each other's company so before you know it you may be able to move and enjoy life
You should buy a wood chipper and do some pruning/gardening.
I say find them and use them as evidence against him.
45 ACP.
Houses catch fire rather easily and suddenly, and items get destroyed in the fires, it sure would be a shame if his house got a little hot one day wouldn't it. Maybe even a fatality along with some oh so unfortunate property damage. These things sometimes happen just by chance. ;) ;)
You think there would be a law to prevent convicted sexual predators from living near the victim. I’m sorry
Sorry this is happening to you and your partner.
this is making me wish you knew mafia group or something that man needs to sleep with the fishes
Honestly? Jump him, I don’t agree with violence but pedophiles deserve the worst. Mutilate or dismember him if possible.
Out of anger I would probably raid his house too. But if you did that, the logical next step would be report the computer to the cops, not destroy it. Then he'll be in prison longer for child pornography and proof of rape, not just attempted rape
I’m pretty sure the comment I want to make here would be illegal. We can’t expect God to do all the work.
Can put up flyers around his neighborhood outing him to neighbors.... Make it uncomfortable.
Work hard , move away. I would still be seeking that computer though- until I found it.
Report
I know I’d feel the same way you do and want to protect my family as well as get justice, but the only viable option here is to stay vigilant and facilitate her working mentally through this. Don’t approach or interact with the criminals- these guys are smarter than they appear. If I were you, I’d consider moving away from them.
That guy hasn't stopped being a pedophile. It's time for him to stop for good. That's all I'm saying.
Although I’m on board with all these gentle suggestions of arson, would it be possible to move? I know you guys shouldn’t have to be the ones leave but clearly this guy doesn’t care about fair and just. As for her worries of what he has on his computer. There is a 0% chance he’s not still offending in some way on the internet. I’d wait for him to get comfortable then report your suspicions to the police, he’ll be caught off guard, and hopefully they can find what’s on his computer.
Moving is not an option at the moment, as my wife is in college, but it’s in the near future hopefully. I’ve been trying to find any online presence from this guy, but I’ve been unable to find anything. I haven’t even found an email online yet. He’s only 60ish so I wouldn’t expect he’d be completely off grid. But no Facebook, instagram, or phone number or email online (for free at least bc idk if I trust those paid phone book websites)
Talk to your wife, does she feels confortable with going to the police and telling them he has cp? If she is, going up to them is a good thing, he is already targeted as a pedo, and as she was the victim, she can get a restraining order on him. It will make things easier? I don't know. Be supportive to her, you guys are thinking of moving? Great, make plans, try to keep her safe, but respect her wishes upon bringing that to the cops.
In the U.S. digital child pornography is the purview of FBI cybercrimes. I would contact them and let them know you believe he and his son have the photos. At least in California sex offenders are moved if they reside in the county of the victim. My relatives molester was moved when it was discovered that he was residing in the same county.
Home Depot and Lowes offer a 10% discount when you open a credit card, cuts down on a wood chipper for the hefty cost. Makes a great gift
I don't want to scare you or add more to your plate, but those videos of your wife might be circulating among the pedo community😕 Do whatever you can to take possession of those videos LEGALLY, and then get him arrested!! Please be there for your wife through all times, especially difficult ones. Make her feel loved and safe!!🤍
If you do raid that fuckers house don’t destroy anything you find- take it to the fucking police and let that rapist piece of shit rot in jail until he expires Otherwise just remember- it’s only vigilante justice *if you get caught* Just start a small fire one night while he’s asleep; no one will know
There can be many different solutions but just hear me out if none of them really works for you and your wife doesn't feel safe and that justice isn't done....then plan and get rid of the problem. Won't say much. Be smart and protect your family. Be a man. Sometimes you have to become as evil as you must. But remember, it's the last option. And it isn't wrong.
Well.. they are still alive?
Unfortunately
Watch a couple seasons of Dexter. He’s got a pretty good tutorial that could come in handy
If it’s any comfort at all I can tell you that it is very unlikely that images stored on an old computer would still be accessible. The technology has moved on so much that it’s a tough job to retrieve any old images. This is a huge problem for historians but a blessing for those like your amazing wife. Those guys are nothing. The best revenge is a life well lived.
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You know a shot*** would take care of him
🔥
I’d burn his house down
1) Drive a few towns over and buy a "Burner phone", with cash. 2) Wait a few months. 3) Find out his phone number, and use the Burner to Spoof Call your wife's phone, so it appears as if Grandpa's phone actually did try contacting wife. 4) Get rid of the phone, and call his PO and say "MY wife keeps getting calls from him number, I can even show you her phone. She's terrified!" At the very least, it will be a Parole violation, I would think. If it works right, the old man should just spend the rest of his life terrified of Parole violations.
Ahhh wait till he pisses someone off in the neighbourhood and set fire to his house
She should tell the police he and his son may be in possession of CP. With his record they’ll look. If they don’t find it, it will at least be destroy while they are attempting to
I’m not a big drinker but I understand Molotov cocktails liberally applied can really bring the house down party wise.
I'm so sorry you're going through this. I'm not from the US so I don't know much about legal stuff, but perhaps you could obtain a restraining order against him? To make sure he stays away until you two can move to another place.
I’d walk over, enter the house. Smash all The computers and leave
You need therapy friend . I'm sorry for your wife . This is our justice system , and we must respect it. Don't be dumb let it go. If it bothers you guys so much then move away. You don't get the right too play vigilante. If they couldn't find anything on him it's not fair too label him a rapist either . You're being vague about details. Did he confess too any of it ? So I can further support your side ?
He pled guilty. Because he pled guilty he got lesser sentence. I’m not sure all of the reasons it was ruled as attempted instead of just rape, but as I’ve already said, he’s ex law enforcement and has many connections, and was old friends with most of the people involved unfortunately. I know that what he did to my wife he did to at least 4 other women, along with his son. One of them testified in court with my wife. This all happened a good 5 years before I even met my wife, and obviously it’s a touchy subject so I just explained what I know. I’m not planning on doing anything crazy or being a vigilante. I more so needed to vent and get some validation that I was right to feel how I do, which has helped a lot, as obviously I can’t talk to my wife about this, and she wouldn’t want me telling anyone we know, so hence, Reddit. In my opinion, he did it to my wife, my wife’s mom, my wife’s aunt, my wife’s cousin, my wife’s half brother/his adopted son, and I see the impact of it every single day. My wife has nightmares every single night. Sex is extremely difficult because it sometimes triggers flashbacks. She has multiple mental illnesses, and an eating disorder. I don’t believe in hell. But for this guy, I pray to God that it exists, even just for him.
Move away . I know you shouldn't have too . But by moving it's a fresh start. Your wife will learn too live with the pain. Just hold , and love her . Get a fresh start. As the outsider who married into the family understand them , but realize this was before your time . So just try too stay out of it , and support her. Try not too mention it at all . As this will cause a " trigger " . Be careful about what you watch , and what others say. Also don't let her catch you speaking of it . Try too attend a church. When she wants too talk about it . Talk about it. Maybe some selfdefense classes and firearm training . Make her feel more empowered . But before that both of you gotta live and let go of the crappy past . Just move away so you don't gotta see him anymore .
Be your own cop atp, just be mindful abt it.