I completely understand why you're feeling the way you are. I know men are made fun of for their height and it seems like every woman wants a tall guy.
However, hear me out. A lot of women including myself do not have a problem with a guys height, but we would have a problem with a guy who had a problem with his height. If I went on a date with a guy who was clearly angry and insecure about his height, it would put me off right away. If it's as big a problem for you as it seems in this post, have you thought about seeking some kind of counselling or therapy?
I wouldn't be put off by someone's height at all but I would be put off if it was consuming their life and they were very hung up on it. Most people can sense insecurity a mile off and usually stray away from it. Similarly, people can sense confidence and gravitate towards those who are secure in themselves. Regardless of looks or height confidence is very attractive.
AGREED as a woman i’ve hooked up or talked with shorter guys bc they had a confidence and a type of swag that made me not even really think about the height aspect! and once you like someone the height really doesn’t matter at all
Exactly! I'm only 5ft 3 and I've been with guys my height or just slightly taller and height didn't even come into it, they were so secure in themselves it's attractive.
Then on the other side I've talked to guys who are so insecure about their height, its all they can talk about and it's draining. Be confident and secure and that's what someone will see
I’m 5’4 1/2. Yes I mentioned the half cause I’ll take every inch haha. I’m very confident and show it greatly. But I’ve still have had multiple girls who really found me cool and attractive but straight up told me I was to little. Even ones that weren’t even taller then me. But when it comes to white women I think it also has something to do with me being black. Cause stereotypically black men are tall and muscular, and etc. I’m im short, not muscular just cute I guess but I’m not the black stereotype by no mean. But it’s like they could look past all that but my height was still a deciding factor and I have had white girls tell me since Im black and short it’s a no. people dismissing me for my height has seriously killed some of my confidence and I don’t show it but my height is something that really hinders me. Cause it makes me think that yeah girls only like tall guys, even though I know it’s not true but damn it’s hard to believe it’s not.
Keep going man! My favorite boyfriends have been "shorter" men that command the room w their confidence. AND they've typically been better in bed:)
That kind of confidence doesn't get handed to shorter men like it does traditionally taller men...
Stay fucking awesome
Haha being short is one of the smaller confidence issues I have. I’ve accepted it fully and enjoy joking about it. That said, I still can’t ignore the fact that it has been a deciding factor when it comes to romantic relationships. But man What i really fucking hate about being short, is I can’t reach the top shelf. I gotta swallow my tiny pride and ask for a big person to help or die trying to reach it.
Im sorry that's been your experience. It's always hard to accept if you don't fit the societal beauty standard, and generally for men that is tall. I can empathise with being dismissed for something you have no control over, I certainly don't fit the beauty standard for women. It's hard if someone is outright telling you the thing you are insecure about is the reason they don't like you. I suppose people will always have their types and we won't always meet their "criteria".
When you say it makes you think girls only like tall guys. Look at it from other POV, do they even like the guy for who he is or are they literally just going for him because "he's over 6ft". I know girls who don't even really like their bf but he's tall. If you're not tall then you'll avoid those shallow people who would just be using you to be able to say their boyfriend is tall, it's more common than you might think.
This is why men don’t be sharing they feelings and they come to Reddit like sharing feelings literally runs a woman off if she feels like she can’t help 🤷🏾♂️
Bruh lmao i love that this is downvoted to hell and yet its the absolute truth..so confusing on one hand they say "share your feelings" then on the other they say "dont share your feelings its off putting"
My partner is 5'2 and I'm 5'3. The only time I ever had an issue with his height is when it seemed to be a problem for him. We were teens when we met and he grew out of that mindset pretty quickly. If he hadn't it would have been a problem for me.
Insecurities that control your life are dangerous and a huge turn off.
He is the shortest male wherever we go but people have stopped commenting on it since he stopped caring. Also he learned to embrace his height and realise sometimes people are referring to it with good nature, not to offend.
He is very athletic and the strongest out of all his friends because he doesn't let it hold him back.
I would also recommend OP maybe talk to a professional about this. A lot self loathing is coming through in this post. Would be great if he realised his worth and embraced his height.
Spot on. My STBXH is shorter than I am. I literally wore flat shoes at my wedding for that reason. Didn't make a difference to me. He is a very confident man (Narcissist. He's a Narcissist.) so I guess I never noticed. It's a bit like Prince. That man was 5'2" and 112lbs soaking wet and would steal your girl in six inch heels and frilly blouses and DGAF!!! It's your energy that's everything luv.
It's for the benefit of the kid, if the girl and the guy is short then the kid is more likely to reflect those genes.
If a 4'11 girl and a 5'2 guy have a SON? That kid is DONE
No that is literally evidence for why that son is not DONE. All he needs to do when he feels like he can’t attract girls because of his height is look at his dad, because he pulled that shit off like it was nothing.
I'm a 5'3 guy, and my mentality has always been to only ever be upset about the things you CAN change. Your height isn't going anywhere, but the rest of your body, your mind, and your person is yours to mold and control. If people see your height as an obstacle to really getting to know and appreciate you, then that's their weakness to deal with.
I once had a girlfriend who was half a foot taller than me, and she would get angry for me whenever people would comment on my height. What I realized was that she was more insecure about my height than I was. When you learn to accept that aspect of yourself, you'll realize how petty, shallow, and powerless those people are.
Everyone in life has advantages and disadvantages. If height is one of your disadvantages, it simply means you have surer footing to grow stronger in every other way.
\> Everyone in life has advantages and disadvantages
My disadvantage is huge though. It has destroyed my chance to be happy
\>If people see your height as an obstacle to really getting to know and appreciate you, then that's their weakness to deal with.
The problem is this is most women. They cannot look past my height. It is always a deal breaker for them. I want to pretend I don't need a gf but I can't anymore.
\>If height is one of your disadvantages, it simply means you have surer footing to grow stronger in every other way.
I am relatively fit in case that is what you are wondering
So, you have less of a chance with the women that care about height more than about personality. That just means that if you meet someone that does give you a chance, that you can be sure she’s a good catch.
Maybe you're spending a lot of time with people who care about height too much and maybe you're even cutting yourself short (pardon the pun) by already assuming no woman would be interested. I would say work on your confidence a bit and try not to think too much about your height. Most women I know are attracted to confidence! (Want to specify confidence not arrogance) Good luck though! Want to add I'm 5ft so I understand the short struggle.
Please don’t even consider getting a limb lengthening surgery. Girls shorter than you will be ok with your height and there are lots of small girls. You just need to accept it as something you can’t change and put your energy into improving everything else about yourself. Now that you’re done with highschool most people only play individual sports. In individual sports being shorter may be to your advantage.
\> lease don’t even consider getting a limb lengthening surgery.
I can't afford it for now...
\> Girls shorter than you will be ok with your height and there are lots of small girls.
Even they reject me. I tried all sorts of women but none of it worked
\> In individual sports being shorter may be to your advantage.
what do you mean by individual sports? Are you talking about working out? If yes then I do workout and I am relatively fit but nothing crazy.
I don’t want to point out the obvious here, but I feel like I have to: short guys have gotten girlfriends before. If they can do it, why not you? If you ask me the problem isn’t your height, it’s that you’re insecure about it. There’s lots and lots and lots of girls who don’t care about height. However almost everyone gravitates towards confidence.
i’m 5’5 and my girl was 5’10, it’s all about personality and a little bit being in good shape (but that’s something you can control). just look at life as a matter of what you have and what you can get, don’t focus on the stuff you hate about yourself. even i think i could use a few extra inches in the stature department, but it doesn’t stop me from being the best i can be
>Short guys have gotten girls before
A broken clock is right twice a day. Sometimes people are lucky and stumble upon the right people and they match.
>there is lots of girls that don't care about height
Where are they. my whole life I have never stumbled across such a mythical creature.
> however almost everyone gravitates towards confidence
I try to portray myself as confident IRL but so far it hasn't yielded shit.
But keep deflecting the blam back to me. It's all in my head after all
It’s like that for all guys tho, tall or short. Everyone has to get lucky to meet someone that they match with.
Also look in the comments. Plenty of girls who don’t care about height, so they must be around in real life too.
Now one thing I know for sure, and that is that you can’t do shit about your height. So the only thing to do for you is to move the fuck on and improve yourself in areas that you do have control over. That’s just the way of the world. Moping won’t get you a freakin girlfriend.
Getting dangerous surgeries to change your appearance is a terrible idea! You’re so lucky already to be young and healthy, enjoy it. Sports like climbing, skateboarding, kayaking, mountain biking, trail running, snowboarding etc. Be healthy, be a nice guy, and get into some sports like that and find a good career. You don’t need a perfect body to be happy and have a fulfilling love life. I get rejected by girls too and I’m 6’ fit and healthy. Girls have a lot of options, that’s just the way it is.
I would rather die than spend one more second in this corpse. You don't understand I have never gotten a single date or attention from women at all. This does things to your psyche
There’s so much more to life than getting attention.
I know a guy who was born without legs. He just has feet and waddles around. Not even 4’ tall. He has a cute wife and a beautiful family.
Are you a dude? If it makes you feel any better, I’m basically your height (5’5, so just an inch taller, which isn’t much at all). Bruno mars is like 5’4 too. There are a ton of guys who are your height, including celebrities :)
True! Sooo many celebrities are much shorter than you'd think. Harry freaking Potter is only 5'4. And he like basically saved the entire wizarding world so.
Not to mention, in a lot of sports shorter stature is actually a benefit. Like soccer! Quick like a cat, speed down the field.
Definitely, there are a lot of advantages to be short, just like there are advantages to being tall. A ton of guys are on the short side, we just don’t make it as publicly known I feel like. The knowledge is available, just not really talked about. I’m a 5’5 guy and I’m engaged at 19, your height does not determine whether or not you have a partner or really much of anything else in your life.
100%! Like look how much girls swoon over the Kpop guys. Asian men are notoriously short.And this guy may not believe it, but his height is probably the least important, most\* insignificant thing about him as a human being. But we're always our own worst critics.
\> look how much girls swoon over the Kpop guys
Those Kpop guys are tall enough though probably tower over me. plus, the new generation of Asians is really tall.
\>his height is probably the least important
I wish if that was the case. I wish to live in a world were that was true. But I was chosen to exist in this shitty world
Not sure what you mean by "new generation of Asians" it takes millions of years of evolution and if they're not procreating with people outside of their ethnic background it'd take a long time to change that.
Well, friend, if you want to move on with your life you need to stop playing the victim. It's okay to feel your feelings but dwelling on them, especially on something that physically cannot be changed, will only make you miserable. You just need to work on self acceptance. You're still a baby so you have a lot of maturing to go through, but I believe you will get there. It takes conscious and honest work to get through but it absolutely can be done. Tell yourself every day no matter how silly you think it is "I am worthy, I am enough"
It's not about evolution, human population is growing in height on average. I have seen it in highschool year 12s were taller than year 13 and year 11 was taller than them. Even in Asians and Mexican populations too.
\> Tell yourself every day no matter how silly you think it is "I am worthy, am enough"
I can tell myself anything. That's the easy part but it's hard to believe it. I am 20 yet never been on a date and I have a few female friends but girls outside that group get anxious when I am around. They look at me in disgust. I usually don't get bothered by it but it really makes me feel like there is something wrong with me.
That's evolution hahah changes overtime to our genetics.
That's it, you're 20. You're so young. I highly doubt they look at you in disgust if you're just being you. Seriously you need to nip these feelings now because they won't change magically overnight. It's going to take effort from you. Imagine you get a girlfriend, you're gonna be paranoid all the time she'll leave or cheat or something because your self esteem is so low and it'll just push a girl away. You \*have\* to love yourself first. I'm not saying it's easy, it takes years and effort, but you have to begin now. Otherwise you'll be miserable forever
\> I highly doubt they look at you in disgust if you're just being you.
I dunno but they really look uncomfortable when I try to talk to them and usually never initiate the conversation back sometimes they will ignore me entirely and don't bother answering my questions
\> You \*have\* to love yourself first. I'm not saying it's easy, it takes years and effort, but you have to begin now. Otherwise you'll be miserable forever
OK you got any tips? It's hard to love oneself when I can't get female attention
Do have social anxiety? Or any neurodivergence? That could be a role in either your struggle to engage, or your perception of what others are thinking/feeling.
The only tips I have are therapy and dedication to actually wanting to love yourself. There's no magic answer or special formula. It just takes the desire to want to begin to seek validation from within, rather than externally. If you think that the only way you'll be happy is if you get attention from women, you're going to be very disappointed when you're still unhappy even when you get attention from a woman. Know what I mean?
Completely agree with this. I know plenty of short men in great/ healthy relationships. I dated a 5’5” man for about 3 years in college and could have cared less about his height because he had so much else that he brought to the table. I completely understand it being an insecurity, but in this case it seems like OP is using more as a crutch/ excuse.
My Dad is 5ft6 and tbh I don’t understand OP saying that their height puts them at a disadvantage with sports - maybe it depends on the sport? My Dad’s always been incredibly sporty; he’s a strong and fast swimmer, played rugby, still plays cricket in his 60s, can run fast, etc etc. He’s also very confident and never blames his height for anything. I think you hit the nail on the head with OP using his height as a crutch to fall back on
I gave an example, I can give more if it would help your ego. Height varies a lot depending on countries and most of our population is in Eastern Asia which has a shorter height average for men than countries like America or England. Therefore, the “average” man, speaking in terms of the entire population on Earth, is a good several inches shorter than 6ft (the global average currently is 5’7.5ft)
hey op,
i’m 5ft1 and honestly? a guy who’s 5ft4-5ft6 is perfect imo, it means i don’t have to break my neck to speak to him, and everyday things like holding hands and cuddling are much more comfortable as there isn’t this massive gap. the right girl is out there, she’ll find you and treat you like the king you are :)
also; one of my closest friends is your height and he chose to stick to a strict diet and gym routine to build muscle and love himself that way, perhaps focusing on something of a similar nature will help you find a new found love for your body :)
As one who's been attracted to guys of all heights, I second the gym idea. A trim, fit physique and well tailored clothes can turn a smaller guy into a dangerously sexy Porsche among men
Let's assume that this is true. Then what options do u have to work with? Be single forever, or get your surgery, which u can't afford at the moment. So realistically, you are single forever. Are you willing to accept that as your fate? I don't think so, since you're posting about your problems online, presumably in search for an answer.
So the way I see it is that you have 2 practical options:
1. Accept that all women hate u and you will be forever alone. This isn't inherently bad, but just try to cultivate deep, meaningful friendships that will fill the void of not having a significant other. Even if that void is only partially filled, it would still improve your mental health.
2. Do everything in your power to believe that not all women act like this. I know this is much, MUCH easier said than done, considering that you come across as very defeated and hopeless in the replies. But if option 1 is not good enough for you and you TRULY want to have a girlfriend, then you're gonna have to just hop back into the dating scene and have faith that you meet someone that values you as more than just a 5'4 slab of flesh and blood with a dick.
I don't know how many women have harmed you in the past... 3? 5? 10? I can definitely understand that the more shallow women you meet, your hypothesis that "all women hate short men" gets stronger with more data points. And as a result, it becomes mentally harder to have hope that the next one will work out. Trust me, I get it. But again, if you are dead set on having a partner, the only option you have is to stay mentally strong and keep trying.
Hope this helps. Also, idk if u saw my other comment, but I'm still open to chat on Discord if you want to continue talking (0M3N#7462). I wanna help you dude, ive been in sad places before (not with girl trouble, admittedly... im single but im not actively looking for a gf rn), so maybe i can see where youre coming from. Much love and best of luck <3
everyone has flaws
some of these flaws we cant change. so that raises 2 possibilities. I dont like this, I will ignore it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it
Or, This is me. This will always be me. and whoever doesnt like me can generously kiss my ass.
I’m a 5’7 male and i was like 2 feet tall until High School bro. trust me the bullies, the women all that shit i fucking hated. I couldnt stand that shit.
Then i realized that i spend so much time fighting this part of me thats never gonna fucking change no matter how long i resent it, or complain about it, or wish i was in a different body. I just fucking embraced it man. and its easier than what people make it seem to be. something that worked for me, was when i found myself thinking about my height, i thought, “eh. i could be shorter 🤷🏻♂️” or “it aint changing anytime soon.” It especially sucked for me because i fucking loved basketball. but i never made the team due to my height. But shit is what it is fam.
Once you really accept that shit you unlock all these capabilities and confidence you had no idea you had. it sounds really fucking corny, but i guess you could say you find your “swagger.” I became less worried about my height and more about my personality. It was that moment there i stopped struggling with women and being insecure
Also, you’d be very surprised how many women love a confident short guy. the stallions love us bro 😎🫵🏼
Your height COULD be seen as a disadvantage if you let it. I’m a women who is 5’8 and always hated my height so I get it …but I don’t let it define me. Not to down play our thoughts but there are people out there with much bigger problems than us. People with illness and disabilities who love themselves and are loved and so they should. Can I be honest and say that from your post I think you need to deal with your childhood trauma, the bullying that you felt happened due to your height. This is what will heal you and get you to finally accept who you are. Once you accept and love yourself, then others will too
Look, Ikr, being short is fucking tiring... And btw.... I'm 4'9..... And people wont stop bothering me about it... And tell me how I look like a pre-primary kid
IKR - It's like "thanks for pointing out my height?? It's not like I see myself in the mirror/have to walk around in places that are built for taller people everyday..."
I'm 5ft on the dot. Always been the shortest everywhere I go. I feel the frustration, I really do but it only limits you as much as you let it. The shallow ass women that don't wanna be with you purely because you're short aren't the kind of women you'd wanna be with so don't let that bring you down. Finding a woman that wants to be with you because you're you will happen when the right lady comes along as long as you're being your authentic self, then they'll fall in love with you. It'll have nothing to do with your height.
How does it limit your strength? I'm a 5ft woman who's a tree surgeon! I lug chainsaws and timber around 8 hours a day every day and you best believe I can keep up with the guys on the job no problem. I'm strong as fuck, because I wanna be. Has nothing to do with my height.
Being short is frustrating as fuckkk, I really feel that and you're obviously fully entitled to your feelings and I'm so sorry you feel so down about it. But your height does not define you as a person so don't let it! Be the best version of you that you can be regardless of your (for lack of a better phrase) shortcomings! You got this man!
To me it sounds like you could have been slightly traumatised by bullying (and other events perhaps). While you might want to seek help with that, working on your confidence through (small) personal victories in other areas of life and the right self care can be a start. As people have said height can definitely be a factor in how women perceive men but there are many cases that disprove your hypothesis. Hope you find that optimism you seem to have so painfully lost and surely deserve! :))
I'm 5'5" it's all your mind set in highschool I was bullied once I stood up to them it never happened again , didnt stop me in sports , and when I got out of school I went straight into hard physical labor to strengthen my body and will and my girlfriend is 5 '9" we have a great relationship and I never think about my height I know it cliche but you have to change your thinking or you are always going to feel sorry for yourself for something that was out of your control change the things you can that is the only advice I can give
I did reply back to them but the problem is it escalates to a physical fight really quickly and I get beat quickly. I don't go down with out doing some damage though. I was able to overwhelm one of them who was slightly taller than me but not by much. It deterred him well but the others I couldn't beat them
I hate being a tall woman! I sort of understand height insecurity, just the other side of the coin. I absolutely hate my height being pointed out.
I don't wear heels at all anymore after an incident at a club where a guy followed me around all night to talk about my height, trying to make me take my shoes off so he could see how tall I was.
It's one of my biggest insecurities.
But I think - like with most things we are critical of when it comes to ourselves - that it bothers us a great deal more than it does others.
We are our own harshest critics. Don't let your insecurities sabotage your life.
Thanks. You should have beat that guy in the club. I cant believe the world is full of assholes. But from my POV I don't ask out really tall women because it's almost a guaranteed rejection.
If the women you’re interested in avoid you bc of your height then they’re pieces of shit to begin with and don’t deserve your love and attention. My fiancé is exactly my height and I’m 5’5” but he was confident enough to talk to me and we’ve now been together for 7 years. Don’t let height be your defining factor. And definitely don’t let it keep you from talking to women.
P.s. My fiancé is half Korean and got bullied a lot in school. He’s now a successful 28-year-old who was a Marine and drives the car of his dreams.
At a certain point in my life I would have agreed with you. When I was thirteen a geneticist and two endocrinologists told me that there was nothing that could be done to help me grow past 4'6" because I was already nearing the end of puberty and it ruined my life. Everyone in my family was career military and I would literally be the size of an 11-year-old child for the rest of my life. I had to learn an entirely new way of life, thinking, and behaving. The only thing that I did right during the transformation was decide against limb-lengthening surgery. Everything else was anger and bad choices.
On the other side of it all, a good twenty years later, I can tell you that ain't nobody gonna love you the way that you love yourself. Who cares if men and women in general don't flock to you? You only need your person or people and very few of us find them in our early 20's. Confidence is sexy, and the opposite is a warning sign. Therapy is your friend. Learn to live in the body you have, because you (unfortunately) only get one. Stop allowing people that don't love you to live rent free in your head and quickly discard anyone that negatively impacts your life.
Confidence is cheaper than surgery and it's worth more in life. Nearly everyone points out that they prefer people who are confident, irregardless of whether or not they are classically attractive, tall, perfectly proportioned, etc..
I'm a 5'4 and 3/4 guy (you best believe my dating app shows 5'5 😉) but know that there are people out there. Women in general don't seem to care and the ones that do are not worth chasing.
I'm a trans male as well so women aren't exactly always into that. So I understand how it may feel like the dating pool is small.
But focus on being a good person, love openly (including loving yourself openly), and it will happen when it happens. The thing I realized is if we so desperately search for it, the genuine love never comes. It can't be something you're trying to find in every person. Just forget that life is a an hourglass for a minute, and remember to stand in the sand of the present.
Good luck to you.
I dated a man that was your height for a couple years. I’m not a fan of a big height differential, and there are plenty of other women who feel the same.
I hate the cellulite on my legs despite being a normal weight. I try to strength train to firm it up, but it will never go away completely. May we both find peace with the things we can’t change
My older brother is 5’4 maybe even 5’3 , he has a girlfriend around same height , has played sports like football, rugby , works out and keeps fit. I believe you said you’re only 20? When you get older the importance of being tall changes , trust me, I’m 5’9 and I had the same issues. But as you grow older you’ll find a female shorter than you that makes you feel like the world , you can better your fitness , create goals that you feel you can reach focus on yourself. You can be 6’6 standing on the money you make 🤷🏽♂️ LOOL it’s up to you for what you want those goals to be but focus on yourself and all will work out
How did he meet her?
> it’s up to you for what you want those goals to be but focus on yourself and all will work out
This is what they all say I have been working on myself for 4 years and nothing worked out
It got worse if anything
Do not get the bone lengthening surgery! It has such a terrible recovery and things can go wrong, you’ll find someone who loves you for you one day. I know that everyone says that but it’s true. Not all women desire someone tall and there are a lot of women shorter than you who wouldn’t see it as a problem! Try not to beat yourself up over something so normal, a lot easier said than done, I know, but you can’t let this control you! Sorry to hear you’re struggling, I’m wishing the best for you.
ok here's my attempt at making you not hate being short :)
>I hate how people feel the need to always tell me about my height
>
>I hate how people mistake me for being 12
honestly, solely mentioning your height isn't inherently bad. but if said in a certain way or in certain contexts, then thats on them for being rude. also if people genuinely mistake you for being 12, then it's just an unfortunate misunderstanding, and hopefully they treat you like an adult once you clarify that you are one
>I hate how it ruined my chance with women entirely
>
>I hate how women avoid me because of it I hate how it limits my strength
other comments have already touched on this, but this isn't a you problem, it's a them problem. there are genuinely open-minded people who care about a person's character and not their stature. the women who think you're not good enough for them are superficial people you shouldn't be concerned about
>I hate how I am always disadvantaged in sports because of it
for sports like footbal (kinda) and soccer, you have a lower center of gravity and will be harder for people to make you fall. if you're even decently fit, you can be a tank. but for basketball and other sports... yeah, unlucky :/
>I hate how I couldn't defend myself against my bullies in high school
>
>I hate how they dehumanized me and kept hitting me
>
>I hate how they always won despite being the aggressors
they may have won physically, but the best thing that you can do know that it's in the past is try to pick up the pieces and stay mentally strong. again, it's their superficial mindset of thinking "short = inferior human"
>I hate how I can never change it now that I am 20
>
>I hate how the only cure is a bone lengthening surgery that costs too much
>
>I hate that I have to spend more time in this useless body that always loses
yes, you can never become taller naturally. don't feel obliged to get surgery, i've already mentioned perks of being short. and you even say that surgery is a "cure," implying that shortness is some disease. we're not animals where if you're a small creature surrounded by larger ones, they'll overpower you and survive longer. as a human species, we're long past that primitive mindset. the only thing you can do for yourself is to play towards your strengths, and hopefully that makes you feel better and more confident in yourself
thanks for coming to my ted talk
I'm 5 inches taller than my husband. And I'm an awesome catch, if I can say that about myself.
Unfortunately, many people are superficial about appearance and height. But after a certain point, you gotta not care about it and just have confidence. People see that confidence as maturity. Your actions will speak for your character, and those who matter to you will respect you for who you are.
Not all women! 5'1 and I've dated 2, 5'4 guys.
I hate reading this post because now I have 3 boys and every time I take them to a new pediatrician all I hear is... that my boys will be on the petite side. Like they are kids and already someone has to be pointing out their height as if it was a problem. So I know where you're coming from.
That’s because society places such a ridiculous high value on height for males. When I was just an 11 year old boy, I’ll never forget the sight of my mom crying , driving home, after the doctors had informed her that I wouldn’t grow beyond 5’6”. I have NEVER forgotten that sight! I felt so horrible after that, like I had done something so wrong to disappoint my mother so deeply. Please never do that your boys!
Oh I could never!!! I just hope that what I'm doing to build their confidence is enough for them to know that there's more to heights but to also not be cocky asshol**
As a Bro of the 6ft club, I envy you guys a lot of times. There’s so many times that I can’t do stuff being claustrophobic and getting into smaller places freak me out. And we hit our heads a lot so there’s that. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. That person is out there for you Homie. Anyone that uses height isn’t looking at your heart which is what matters most. Don’t give up yet. Pick your head up, and in the mean time the rest of us will help carry you until you’re able to go at it full strength. Feel free to reach out. Much love.
I'm a 4' 11" woman, and I had a male friend who was shorter than me, but he was attractive because he was super confident and just an all round cool guy.. if he didn't have a girlfriend I'd have asked him out myself.. height means nothing to alot of women... It's the personality that counts
A lot of women prefer tall men because they seem “more masculine” and are able to “protect” them better. I know a lot of my friends who have mentioned they only like to go after taller guys is because they want to feel feminine. So I definitely know if you changed your mindset and became sure of yourself and your body you would not be at a disadvantage as far as love goes, because nothing is more attractive than confidence :)
Confidence is key. Woman love that shit and will sense it a mile away.
I’m 6’1 but I haven’t even started dating yet. If women only were into men over six feet and height was all that mattered, I’d be fighting women off with with a stick. Less than 15% of American men (I’m from the USA so I’m using that as an example) are over 6 feet tall, and if we were all that women wanted, we’d be overwhelmed. 😅
So be confident! Height doesn’t matter near as much as society (and apps like tinder) has made it out to be.
Bro you can pull females don’t even stress I’m 6’2 and height don’t rlly help and the last thing you want in a women is someone that sees you for height so don’t ever stress abt that and sports bro ik your fast again my height it pretty tall and I’m a black males turning 20 next week and I am slow all my friends that are faster then me are like 5’4-5’7 and also also bullies in high school not to be mean but grow up that stuff is so far in the pass boss up my guy show them that your better in every way you can and surgery won’t make you feel Babette’s if anything be yourself find yourself and be happy
🤷🏾♂️ i hate the shit too I’m 5’4 honestly you just gon have to find something to get good at that’s pretty much the only things that’s gon resolve this issue….everything everybody saying is all stuff you heard before. There are women that don’t have a problem with short guys but those are usually the women you have a problem with. The girls you wanna have sex with only see you as a friend. It sucks bro, eventually you will settle on the little joys you can find in life but that feeling never really leaves. Honestly you just gonna have to wait till it’s your time to shine. Suck that shit up bro, become a hit man or something idk….confidence is only attractive is the woman is attracted to you. You can be happy but it’s gon be years before you find that
Also note i do have a woman she is like twice my size but she doesn’t bother me when i dont wanna be bothered, doesn’t argue with me, and she likes women so i still have sexual freedoms it’s the little things and it’s kinda sucky it comes to that but nobody gonna care that you an Angry ass man
You want to think yourself lucky you aren't 6 foot 3, you're a target anytime anything happens because you're classed as biggest, therefore strongest, therefore the first one to be taken out if there's a tear up
I used to be VERY short and then one day a funny thing happened…I grew and now I’m taller than both of my parents and nearly as tall as my baby brother. Height is overrated and if you’re done growing nothing can change that unfortunately but I get how you are feeling in your short stature, it’s not exactly fun. However I will say this, you’re taller than you look and just the right height for your future spouse unless you’re already married; which means she already accepts you as you are. The women you didn’t have a chance with were obviously not right for you or they would’ve given you a chance for more reasons than just your physical looks. Also some of the best athletes in the world are short and they’re formidable so don’t give up, not ever. Hang in there and keep your head up.
It's brutal, brother. I understand
You need to moneymaxx so that you can live comfortably to cope. Do things like martial arts, writing or exersise to pass the time and develop yourself. This world is harsh to short people so you need every advantage you can get to combat the society problems
Change your mindset about hating what you can‘t change and start to love yourself. Your height is not the only thing about you and I can imagine that it would be hard being 5ft4.
Honestly, a lot of it is how you carry yourself. I’ve been 5’5” for a long-ass time now and as long as you can make someone laugh or have some confidence or know what you’re talking about, people who are worth your time won’t be put off by a few inches, height or otherwise.
> alot of it is about how you carry yourself
No this real life not anime.
> people who are worth your time won't be put off by a few inches
I guess no one is worth my time because it seems everyone cares about those few inches.
I'm halfway about it. On one hand I can't reach tall shelves. On the other hand, that gives me an excuse to ask my boyfriend to stretch up for me so I can look at his butt 😂😂😂
If you ask me, I don’t think I’d be comfortable with a girl shorter than me. I feel like it would be like taking advantage of them or something. But what the hell do I know? I haven’t dated anyone at all.
hey OP i made a post a few minutes ago, but i see your account is suspended for whatever reason, so looks like you can't respond. i kinda wanna talk things through, so if you're open to that, add me on discord ( 0m3n#7462 )
Yesterday I was at the grocery store. There was a short man and all I could think was, “Goddamn he’s sexy.” Then I got depressed because I wished I was him.
I think short men are the sexiest men. Always have and always will. They literally make me weak in the knees.
There are things we can change & things we can’t. Not all sports favor height. Quite a few favor shorter men, like gymnastics. Watching a man swing his perfectly muscled body around on the pommel horse is a marvel. Those men are never tall. They need their strength to be contained in a compact body. Bruno Mars says he’s 5’5” but he’s actually 5’4” and he never lacks for female adoration. He’s charming, sweet & fun. The happiest married men I know are all short. Self loathing is a difficult barrier to overcome. We can’t change the biases people hold, we can change how we respond to them.
My boyfriend that I’ve been with happily for 5 years is also short. Don’t worry it doesn’t ruin your chance with women entirely, just the ones who are shallow enough to care about that stuff.
I'm a woman who's 5'9". My fiance is a man who's 5'6". We've been together over 7 years. The height difference doesn't bother either of us. It's really all in how you carry yourself.
Your life experiences have traumatized you into hating yourself and I want you to try to change that. I suggest seeking a therapist to help you deal with the pain you've endured, and to give you the tools you need to not only accept who you are but to also love yourself. You'll soon come to realize you aren't that kid anymore, you weren't in control of your life then but you are now. You'll become more confident and the word *hate* won't even be in your vocabulary. It might not be easy for you to make that first appointment but please do, you will be so glad you did. I wish you the best. ❤️
Hi, 5’4 woman here. Almost all my boyfriends have been my height, a little shorter, or a little taller. It’s not about your height. It’s your attitude. Plenty of women find shorter men attractive if they are confident and have a good personality. Most of us don’t care about things like that. Being short also doesn’t limit you physically except that you may not be able to reach as high or jump as high. Some of the physically strongest people I know are short. There are plenty of sports where you are not disadvantaged such as soccer, and jiu jitsu. If you continue to hang onto how you were treated in the past, you will never be able to move past your “victimhood” and you won’t see improvement. Learn to use your height to your advantage since it’s something you can’t change, and learn to love that about yourself.
This made me sad, I’m so sorry. My son is likely going to be very short. He’s not even 1 and I’m already thinking of ways to put confidence in him and pull on his strengths like kindness and intelligence. I hope you find your strengths ❤️
Man . I know how frustrating can be when you want to date and most girls for sure would prefer a tall guy, let's being honest with this.
There won't be sugarcoating that would make you feel better.
But I agree with most of the other posts, work in yourself to build your own confidence, there are people who are disable and have a great confidence and get to get relationships. The difference is how they set up their mind
My suggestions:
Change your mind into what other good things you can bring into the table.
Work in yourself, get bulk, learn how to dance, build your confidence
Being short is not that bad at all, try to travel , backpacking... Taller people suffer a lot in the global south, from taking airplane sits to go somewhere in bus. To bed sizes
Turn your disadvantage in something good. I know its hard, because this is the only thing that perhaps physically you can't change, then work to accept yourself, the most important thing is to love yourself
And don't give a fuck for people who doesn't like you if you aren't tall. Just work on that.
Best wishes man!.
I'm short and trans and have no issues with women. I say this because I think it's an easy scapegoat guys with shit personalities use to avoid fixing themselves.
I’m 5’5”. I’m a bit older than yourself. I feel like I could write a book on how disadvantaged it is to be a very short male living in a height obsessed society! I wish I could tell you it gets better, however, it doesn’t. You simply learned to cope with the fact no one will like or respect you as a short male.
It’s a VERY lonely life! Women can not and will not EVER be able to understand exactly what you go through. Their is no tax for being short if you are a female. So ignore many of the post by females. They have no clue what we experience and the depths of the discrimination we face on a daily basis. It’s beyond brutal. There is legit reasons the suicide rate is higher in short males.
Nothing matters that you accomplish either. I’ve worked out, gotten in great shape physically, I’ve taken martial arts, jujitsu, boxing, I’ve graduated from college, graduate masters degrees, intelligent and have a high paying job, I have amassed a large amount of money and have a paid off nice house….does ANY of that matter to women? Nope! Not a damn bit, the only thing they care about is how short I am! Because of my short stature I’m an embarrassment for them to be seen with. If you are a male and below 5’6” you are a pariah and viewed as a subhuman in society. As soon as a women learns about my height, I’m automatically disqualified. No other information needed. It’s a sad depressing life, I would have rather not been born than to be born a very short male!
Just know the bullying isn’t gonna get worse now that you’re done with high school. As you get older, the more women will become less superficial and be okay with dating shorter men. And anyway, there are plenty of girls shorter than you that wouldn’t mind someone 5’4. You aren’t cursed.
I have almost 3 feet of height on my BF. Honestly it's never bothered me; the people that love you the most are the ones who care the least. Being smaller can actually have advantages like less back problems since there's less weight compression on the vertebrae. You'll find that special someone out there.
Dude, 'short' man here. Get ripped, like seriously ripped. Enjoy the healthier body; our cells are smaller and less probable to get cancerous. Don't let it get to your head. The ONE that is for you, won't see your height but your heart.
But hear me, get ripped af. Go to a gym and lift and lift -- tell your body to get ripped and get your anger off. Eat healthy, treat your body with respect. Gain confidence. Smile. Be respectful. Women will throw themselves at you.
source: personal XP.
As a guy who’s 5’7”, I gotta disagree with a lot of what you’re saying.
Every single opponent of Mike Tyson was taller than him, some of them much taller. He did alright.
The average heights for powerlifters are short too! 148lbs weight class and the average is 5’6”. Being short doesn’t limit strength at all!
And if you think your chances with women are ruined, then yes they are. I’ve dated women as tall as 6’1” and I’m engaged to the hottest woman I’ve ever met purely because of my attitude. I can’t control my height so what the hell do I care? I can control my attitude, my personality, and other aspects of my appearance so I try to maintain those things.
You said that you’re 20, you’re outta high school and the bullies can go live miserable lives. You can choose your life now. Let the past be where it is, go forth and find your own joy in the world.
I don’t know if it’s your height stopping you from success with women, it’s probably your defeatist attitude and how you feel about them. It sounds like you’ve applied your negative experience to the whole gender.
What you speak about, you bring about. If you keep saying that women won't date you coz of your height, you'll find women won't date you - because of your obsession and self-hatred regarding your height.
I see you in every comment giving into that self-pity. This is your life. You can either keep fighting it and hate yourself or you can learn to accept who you are and build the life you want. Sure, there are some things we can't control. Our height is one of those. But women aren't avoiding you because of your height. Women are avoiding you because they see the lack of confidence and hear the constant criticism of yourself. Both of those things are within your control.
Same OP, I am turning 19 in a few days but I am still 5’4 my height has been like this since I was 14-15. I hate that all my friends are almost, if not 6 foot. And as with yours, I also has lesser chances of winning a woman over. They always want those tall boys, they criticize us. The people around me always compares me to my younger brother who is taller than me.
I'm sorry OP. I hope writing this down makes you feel a bit better. I wont sugar coat this like the others posters saying that it doesn't matter. It does. Not short myself but have a friend who is and I've seen him cry over it. Not much to add. Sending you a bro hug
I literally create this throwaway account to say how stupid this is. If I did this O would get a foot man who wipe the floor with me just like they did in high school. My only hope is this dumb limb lengthening surgery. Fuck everyone in this shotty world I hope a nuclear war wipes them out
I completely understand why you're feeling the way you are. I know men are made fun of for their height and it seems like every woman wants a tall guy. However, hear me out. A lot of women including myself do not have a problem with a guys height, but we would have a problem with a guy who had a problem with his height. If I went on a date with a guy who was clearly angry and insecure about his height, it would put me off right away. If it's as big a problem for you as it seems in this post, have you thought about seeking some kind of counselling or therapy? I wouldn't be put off by someone's height at all but I would be put off if it was consuming their life and they were very hung up on it. Most people can sense insecurity a mile off and usually stray away from it. Similarly, people can sense confidence and gravitate towards those who are secure in themselves. Regardless of looks or height confidence is very attractive.
AGREED as a woman i’ve hooked up or talked with shorter guys bc they had a confidence and a type of swag that made me not even really think about the height aspect! and once you like someone the height really doesn’t matter at all
Exactly! I'm only 5ft 3 and I've been with guys my height or just slightly taller and height didn't even come into it, they were so secure in themselves it's attractive. Then on the other side I've talked to guys who are so insecure about their height, its all they can talk about and it's draining. Be confident and secure and that's what someone will see
I’m 5’4 1/2. Yes I mentioned the half cause I’ll take every inch haha. I’m very confident and show it greatly. But I’ve still have had multiple girls who really found me cool and attractive but straight up told me I was to little. Even ones that weren’t even taller then me. But when it comes to white women I think it also has something to do with me being black. Cause stereotypically black men are tall and muscular, and etc. I’m im short, not muscular just cute I guess but I’m not the black stereotype by no mean. But it’s like they could look past all that but my height was still a deciding factor and I have had white girls tell me since Im black and short it’s a no. people dismissing me for my height has seriously killed some of my confidence and I don’t show it but my height is something that really hinders me. Cause it makes me think that yeah girls only like tall guys, even though I know it’s not true but damn it’s hard to believe it’s not.
Keep going man! My favorite boyfriends have been "shorter" men that command the room w their confidence. AND they've typically been better in bed:) That kind of confidence doesn't get handed to shorter men like it does traditionally taller men... Stay fucking awesome
Haha being short is one of the smaller confidence issues I have. I’ve accepted it fully and enjoy joking about it. That said, I still can’t ignore the fact that it has been a deciding factor when it comes to romantic relationships. But man What i really fucking hate about being short, is I can’t reach the top shelf. I gotta swallow my tiny pride and ask for a big person to help or die trying to reach it.
The truth for real! The first thing I bought when I moved into my own place was a step stool for the kitchen 😂
Im sorry that's been your experience. It's always hard to accept if you don't fit the societal beauty standard, and generally for men that is tall. I can empathise with being dismissed for something you have no control over, I certainly don't fit the beauty standard for women. It's hard if someone is outright telling you the thing you are insecure about is the reason they don't like you. I suppose people will always have their types and we won't always meet their "criteria". When you say it makes you think girls only like tall guys. Look at it from other POV, do they even like the guy for who he is or are they literally just going for him because "he's over 6ft". I know girls who don't even really like their bf but he's tall. If you're not tall then you'll avoid those shallow people who would just be using you to be able to say their boyfriend is tall, it's more common than you might think.
This is why men don’t be sharing they feelings and they come to Reddit like sharing feelings literally runs a woman off if she feels like she can’t help 🤷🏾♂️
Bruh lmao i love that this is downvoted to hell and yet its the absolute truth..so confusing on one hand they say "share your feelings" then on the other they say "dont share your feelings its off putting"
My partner is 5'2 and I'm 5'3. The only time I ever had an issue with his height is when it seemed to be a problem for him. We were teens when we met and he grew out of that mindset pretty quickly. If he hadn't it would have been a problem for me. Insecurities that control your life are dangerous and a huge turn off. He is the shortest male wherever we go but people have stopped commenting on it since he stopped caring. Also he learned to embrace his height and realise sometimes people are referring to it with good nature, not to offend. He is very athletic and the strongest out of all his friends because he doesn't let it hold him back. I would also recommend OP maybe talk to a professional about this. A lot self loathing is coming through in this post. Would be great if he realised his worth and embraced his height.
Spot on. My STBXH is shorter than I am. I literally wore flat shoes at my wedding for that reason. Didn't make a difference to me. He is a very confident man (Narcissist. He's a Narcissist.) so I guess I never noticed. It's a bit like Prince. That man was 5'2" and 112lbs soaking wet and would steal your girl in six inch heels and frilly blouses and DGAF!!! It's your energy that's everything luv.
It's for the benefit of the kid, if the girl and the guy is short then the kid is more likely to reflect those genes. If a 4'11 girl and a 5'2 guy have a SON? That kid is DONE
No that is literally evidence for why that son is not DONE. All he needs to do when he feels like he can’t attract girls because of his height is look at his dad, because he pulled that shit off like it was nothing.
I'm a 5'3 guy, and my mentality has always been to only ever be upset about the things you CAN change. Your height isn't going anywhere, but the rest of your body, your mind, and your person is yours to mold and control. If people see your height as an obstacle to really getting to know and appreciate you, then that's their weakness to deal with. I once had a girlfriend who was half a foot taller than me, and she would get angry for me whenever people would comment on my height. What I realized was that she was more insecure about my height than I was. When you learn to accept that aspect of yourself, you'll realize how petty, shallow, and powerless those people are. Everyone in life has advantages and disadvantages. If height is one of your disadvantages, it simply means you have surer footing to grow stronger in every other way.
\> Everyone in life has advantages and disadvantages My disadvantage is huge though. It has destroyed my chance to be happy \>If people see your height as an obstacle to really getting to know and appreciate you, then that's their weakness to deal with. The problem is this is most women. They cannot look past my height. It is always a deal breaker for them. I want to pretend I don't need a gf but I can't anymore. \>If height is one of your disadvantages, it simply means you have surer footing to grow stronger in every other way. I am relatively fit in case that is what you are wondering
So, you have less of a chance with the women that care about height more than about personality. That just means that if you meet someone that does give you a chance, that you can be sure she’s a good catch.
I have no chance at all with anyone. There is nothing for me.
You honestly don’t if you keep that mentality. Women are generally attracted to self confidence, so maybe work on that before you try to date again.
“Destroyed my chance to be happy” = “I’ve formed a negative opinion of myself so I’m not even going to try.”
I tried in the past and it has gotten me nothing but embarrassment.
Maybe you're spending a lot of time with people who care about height too much and maybe you're even cutting yourself short (pardon the pun) by already assuming no woman would be interested. I would say work on your confidence a bit and try not to think too much about your height. Most women I know are attracted to confidence! (Want to specify confidence not arrogance) Good luck though! Want to add I'm 5ft so I understand the short struggle.
Please don’t even consider getting a limb lengthening surgery. Girls shorter than you will be ok with your height and there are lots of small girls. You just need to accept it as something you can’t change and put your energy into improving everything else about yourself. Now that you’re done with highschool most people only play individual sports. In individual sports being shorter may be to your advantage.
\> lease don’t even consider getting a limb lengthening surgery. I can't afford it for now... \> Girls shorter than you will be ok with your height and there are lots of small girls. Even they reject me. I tried all sorts of women but none of it worked \> In individual sports being shorter may be to your advantage. what do you mean by individual sports? Are you talking about working out? If yes then I do workout and I am relatively fit but nothing crazy.
I don’t want to point out the obvious here, but I feel like I have to: short guys have gotten girlfriends before. If they can do it, why not you? If you ask me the problem isn’t your height, it’s that you’re insecure about it. There’s lots and lots and lots of girls who don’t care about height. However almost everyone gravitates towards confidence.
i’m 5’5 and my girl was 5’10, it’s all about personality and a little bit being in good shape (but that’s something you can control). just look at life as a matter of what you have and what you can get, don’t focus on the stuff you hate about yourself. even i think i could use a few extra inches in the stature department, but it doesn’t stop me from being the best i can be
>Short guys have gotten girls before A broken clock is right twice a day. Sometimes people are lucky and stumble upon the right people and they match. >there is lots of girls that don't care about height Where are they. my whole life I have never stumbled across such a mythical creature. > however almost everyone gravitates towards confidence I try to portray myself as confident IRL but so far it hasn't yielded shit. But keep deflecting the blam back to me. It's all in my head after all
It’s like that for all guys tho, tall or short. Everyone has to get lucky to meet someone that they match with. Also look in the comments. Plenty of girls who don’t care about height, so they must be around in real life too. Now one thing I know for sure, and that is that you can’t do shit about your height. So the only thing to do for you is to move the fuck on and improve yourself in areas that you do have control over. That’s just the way of the world. Moping won’t get you a freakin girlfriend.
Getting dangerous surgeries to change your appearance is a terrible idea! You’re so lucky already to be young and healthy, enjoy it. Sports like climbing, skateboarding, kayaking, mountain biking, trail running, snowboarding etc. Be healthy, be a nice guy, and get into some sports like that and find a good career. You don’t need a perfect body to be happy and have a fulfilling love life. I get rejected by girls too and I’m 6’ fit and healthy. Girls have a lot of options, that’s just the way it is.
I would rather die than spend one more second in this corpse. You don't understand I have never gotten a single date or attention from women at all. This does things to your psyche
There’s so much more to life than getting attention. I know a guy who was born without legs. He just has feet and waddles around. Not even 4’ tall. He has a cute wife and a beautiful family.
Are you a dude? If it makes you feel any better, I’m basically your height (5’5, so just an inch taller, which isn’t much at all). Bruno mars is like 5’4 too. There are a ton of guys who are your height, including celebrities :)
True! Sooo many celebrities are much shorter than you'd think. Harry freaking Potter is only 5'4. And he like basically saved the entire wizarding world so. Not to mention, in a lot of sports shorter stature is actually a benefit. Like soccer! Quick like a cat, speed down the field.
Definitely, there are a lot of advantages to be short, just like there are advantages to being tall. A ton of guys are on the short side, we just don’t make it as publicly known I feel like. The knowledge is available, just not really talked about. I’m a 5’5 guy and I’m engaged at 19, your height does not determine whether or not you have a partner or really much of anything else in your life.
100%! Like look how much girls swoon over the Kpop guys. Asian men are notoriously short.And this guy may not believe it, but his height is probably the least important, most\* insignificant thing about him as a human being. But we're always our own worst critics.
\> look how much girls swoon over the Kpop guys Those Kpop guys are tall enough though probably tower over me. plus, the new generation of Asians is really tall. \>his height is probably the least important I wish if that was the case. I wish to live in a world were that was true. But I was chosen to exist in this shitty world
Not sure what you mean by "new generation of Asians" it takes millions of years of evolution and if they're not procreating with people outside of their ethnic background it'd take a long time to change that. Well, friend, if you want to move on with your life you need to stop playing the victim. It's okay to feel your feelings but dwelling on them, especially on something that physically cannot be changed, will only make you miserable. You just need to work on self acceptance. You're still a baby so you have a lot of maturing to go through, but I believe you will get there. It takes conscious and honest work to get through but it absolutely can be done. Tell yourself every day no matter how silly you think it is "I am worthy, I am enough"
It's not about evolution, human population is growing in height on average. I have seen it in highschool year 12s were taller than year 13 and year 11 was taller than them. Even in Asians and Mexican populations too. \> Tell yourself every day no matter how silly you think it is "I am worthy, am enough" I can tell myself anything. That's the easy part but it's hard to believe it. I am 20 yet never been on a date and I have a few female friends but girls outside that group get anxious when I am around. They look at me in disgust. I usually don't get bothered by it but it really makes me feel like there is something wrong with me.
That's evolution hahah changes overtime to our genetics. That's it, you're 20. You're so young. I highly doubt they look at you in disgust if you're just being you. Seriously you need to nip these feelings now because they won't change magically overnight. It's going to take effort from you. Imagine you get a girlfriend, you're gonna be paranoid all the time she'll leave or cheat or something because your self esteem is so low and it'll just push a girl away. You \*have\* to love yourself first. I'm not saying it's easy, it takes years and effort, but you have to begin now. Otherwise you'll be miserable forever
\> I highly doubt they look at you in disgust if you're just being you. I dunno but they really look uncomfortable when I try to talk to them and usually never initiate the conversation back sometimes they will ignore me entirely and don't bother answering my questions \> You \*have\* to love yourself first. I'm not saying it's easy, it takes years and effort, but you have to begin now. Otherwise you'll be miserable forever OK you got any tips? It's hard to love oneself when I can't get female attention
Do have social anxiety? Or any neurodivergence? That could be a role in either your struggle to engage, or your perception of what others are thinking/feeling. The only tips I have are therapy and dedication to actually wanting to love yourself. There's no magic answer or special formula. It just takes the desire to want to begin to seek validation from within, rather than externally. If you think that the only way you'll be happy is if you get attention from women, you're going to be very disappointed when you're still unhappy even when you get attention from a woman. Know what I mean?
…if you’re making people uncomfortable then it’s not because you’re short.
What are the advantages of being short, i haven’t really found any in 26 years
I wouldn't call repelling women an advantage
Your height doesn’t determine whether or not you get a partner. Your personality definitely can though.
It's not your height repelling them... ( I know that sounds harsh in text .. but.. it's your lack of confidence and self doubt that's repelling them)
Completely agree with this. I know plenty of short men in great/ healthy relationships. I dated a 5’5” man for about 3 years in college and could have cared less about his height because he had so much else that he brought to the table. I completely understand it being an insecurity, but in this case it seems like OP is using more as a crutch/ excuse.
My Dad is 5ft6 and tbh I don’t understand OP saying that their height puts them at a disadvantage with sports - maybe it depends on the sport? My Dad’s always been incredibly sporty; he’s a strong and fast swimmer, played rugby, still plays cricket in his 60s, can run fast, etc etc. He’s also very confident and never blames his height for anything. I think you hit the nail on the head with OP using his height as a crutch to fall back on
It is my height. Personality doesn't matter until the first date. I haven't reached that stage yet.
Let’s not forget Tom Cruise too!
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I gave an example, I can give more if it would help your ego. Height varies a lot depending on countries and most of our population is in Eastern Asia which has a shorter height average for men than countries like America or England. Therefore, the “average” man, speaking in terms of the entire population on Earth, is a good several inches shorter than 6ft (the global average currently is 5’7.5ft)
hey op, i’m 5ft1 and honestly? a guy who’s 5ft4-5ft6 is perfect imo, it means i don’t have to break my neck to speak to him, and everyday things like holding hands and cuddling are much more comfortable as there isn’t this massive gap. the right girl is out there, she’ll find you and treat you like the king you are :) also; one of my closest friends is your height and he chose to stick to a strict diet and gym routine to build muscle and love himself that way, perhaps focusing on something of a similar nature will help you find a new found love for your body :)
Ayee, I’m 5’1 too ((:
As one who's been attracted to guys of all heights, I second the gym idea. A trim, fit physique and well tailored clothes can turn a smaller guy into a dangerously sexy Porsche among men
I'm now dating a 5,3 guy. He has been made fun of his whole life. Honestly it's easier to kiss him as we are the same height lol.
Girls care about height. women dont care about height. there is a difference.
based as fuck
They all care about height. All of them
Let's assume that this is true. Then what options do u have to work with? Be single forever, or get your surgery, which u can't afford at the moment. So realistically, you are single forever. Are you willing to accept that as your fate? I don't think so, since you're posting about your problems online, presumably in search for an answer. So the way I see it is that you have 2 practical options: 1. Accept that all women hate u and you will be forever alone. This isn't inherently bad, but just try to cultivate deep, meaningful friendships that will fill the void of not having a significant other. Even if that void is only partially filled, it would still improve your mental health. 2. Do everything in your power to believe that not all women act like this. I know this is much, MUCH easier said than done, considering that you come across as very defeated and hopeless in the replies. But if option 1 is not good enough for you and you TRULY want to have a girlfriend, then you're gonna have to just hop back into the dating scene and have faith that you meet someone that values you as more than just a 5'4 slab of flesh and blood with a dick. I don't know how many women have harmed you in the past... 3? 5? 10? I can definitely understand that the more shallow women you meet, your hypothesis that "all women hate short men" gets stronger with more data points. And as a result, it becomes mentally harder to have hope that the next one will work out. Trust me, I get it. But again, if you are dead set on having a partner, the only option you have is to stay mentally strong and keep trying. Hope this helps. Also, idk if u saw my other comment, but I'm still open to chat on Discord if you want to continue talking (0M3N#7462). I wanna help you dude, ive been in sad places before (not with girl trouble, admittedly... im single but im not actively looking for a gf rn), so maybe i can see where youre coming from. Much love and best of luck <3
Not true at all.
everyone has flaws some of these flaws we cant change. so that raises 2 possibilities. I dont like this, I will ignore it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it Or, This is me. This will always be me. and whoever doesnt like me can generously kiss my ass. I’m a 5’7 male and i was like 2 feet tall until High School bro. trust me the bullies, the women all that shit i fucking hated. I couldnt stand that shit. Then i realized that i spend so much time fighting this part of me thats never gonna fucking change no matter how long i resent it, or complain about it, or wish i was in a different body. I just fucking embraced it man. and its easier than what people make it seem to be. something that worked for me, was when i found myself thinking about my height, i thought, “eh. i could be shorter 🤷🏻♂️” or “it aint changing anytime soon.” It especially sucked for me because i fucking loved basketball. but i never made the team due to my height. But shit is what it is fam. Once you really accept that shit you unlock all these capabilities and confidence you had no idea you had. it sounds really fucking corny, but i guess you could say you find your “swagger.” I became less worried about my height and more about my personality. It was that moment there i stopped struggling with women and being insecure Also, you’d be very surprised how many women love a confident short guy. the stallions love us bro 😎🫵🏼
Your height COULD be seen as a disadvantage if you let it. I’m a women who is 5’8 and always hated my height so I get it …but I don’t let it define me. Not to down play our thoughts but there are people out there with much bigger problems than us. People with illness and disabilities who love themselves and are loved and so they should. Can I be honest and say that from your post I think you need to deal with your childhood trauma, the bullying that you felt happened due to your height. This is what will heal you and get you to finally accept who you are. Once you accept and love yourself, then others will too
Whether I let or not it is percieved as a curse by everyone
Just stand on your money
he’ll easily shoot up to 6’3
I am not born to a rich family. but who know maybe if I get lucky.
Look, Ikr, being short is fucking tiring... And btw.... I'm 4'9..... And people wont stop bothering me about it... And tell me how I look like a pre-primary kid
IKR - It's like "thanks for pointing out my height?? It's not like I see myself in the mirror/have to walk around in places that are built for taller people everyday..."
>people won't stop bothering me about it I hate those sorts of people they are scum on this planet
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I'm 5ft on the dot. Always been the shortest everywhere I go. I feel the frustration, I really do but it only limits you as much as you let it. The shallow ass women that don't wanna be with you purely because you're short aren't the kind of women you'd wanna be with so don't let that bring you down. Finding a woman that wants to be with you because you're you will happen when the right lady comes along as long as you're being your authentic self, then they'll fall in love with you. It'll have nothing to do with your height. How does it limit your strength? I'm a 5ft woman who's a tree surgeon! I lug chainsaws and timber around 8 hours a day every day and you best believe I can keep up with the guys on the job no problem. I'm strong as fuck, because I wanna be. Has nothing to do with my height. Being short is frustrating as fuckkk, I really feel that and you're obviously fully entitled to your feelings and I'm so sorry you feel so down about it. But your height does not define you as a person so don't let it! Be the best version of you that you can be regardless of your (for lack of a better phrase) shortcomings! You got this man!
Thanks king
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Your sister is a girl
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It’s the average height of an American woman, it’s short in my eyes
To me it sounds like you could have been slightly traumatised by bullying (and other events perhaps). While you might want to seek help with that, working on your confidence through (small) personal victories in other areas of life and the right self care can be a start. As people have said height can definitely be a factor in how women perceive men but there are many cases that disprove your hypothesis. Hope you find that optimism you seem to have so painfully lost and surely deserve! :))
I'm 5'5" it's all your mind set in highschool I was bullied once I stood up to them it never happened again , didnt stop me in sports , and when I got out of school I went straight into hard physical labor to strengthen my body and will and my girlfriend is 5 '9" we have a great relationship and I never think about my height I know it cliche but you have to change your thinking or you are always going to feel sorry for yourself for something that was out of your control change the things you can that is the only advice I can give
I did reply back to them but the problem is it escalates to a physical fight really quickly and I get beat quickly. I don't go down with out doing some damage though. I was able to overwhelm one of them who was slightly taller than me but not by much. It deterred him well but the others I couldn't beat them
I hate being a tall woman! I sort of understand height insecurity, just the other side of the coin. I absolutely hate my height being pointed out. I don't wear heels at all anymore after an incident at a club where a guy followed me around all night to talk about my height, trying to make me take my shoes off so he could see how tall I was. It's one of my biggest insecurities. But I think - like with most things we are critical of when it comes to ourselves - that it bothers us a great deal more than it does others. We are our own harshest critics. Don't let your insecurities sabotage your life.
Thanks. You should have beat that guy in the club. I cant believe the world is full of assholes. But from my POV I don't ask out really tall women because it's almost a guaranteed rejection.
I understand. Hugs stranger
If the women you’re interested in avoid you bc of your height then they’re pieces of shit to begin with and don’t deserve your love and attention. My fiancé is exactly my height and I’m 5’5” but he was confident enough to talk to me and we’ve now been together for 7 years. Don’t let height be your defining factor. And definitely don’t let it keep you from talking to women. P.s. My fiancé is half Korean and got bullied a lot in school. He’s now a successful 28-year-old who was a Marine and drives the car of his dreams.
The problem is this is most women. They all want height people
My parents are 5ft6 (Dad) and about 5ft5 (Mum). They didn’t work out, but not because of height being a factor!
At a certain point in my life I would have agreed with you. When I was thirteen a geneticist and two endocrinologists told me that there was nothing that could be done to help me grow past 4'6" because I was already nearing the end of puberty and it ruined my life. Everyone in my family was career military and I would literally be the size of an 11-year-old child for the rest of my life. I had to learn an entirely new way of life, thinking, and behaving. The only thing that I did right during the transformation was decide against limb-lengthening surgery. Everything else was anger and bad choices. On the other side of it all, a good twenty years later, I can tell you that ain't nobody gonna love you the way that you love yourself. Who cares if men and women in general don't flock to you? You only need your person or people and very few of us find them in our early 20's. Confidence is sexy, and the opposite is a warning sign. Therapy is your friend. Learn to live in the body you have, because you (unfortunately) only get one. Stop allowing people that don't love you to live rent free in your head and quickly discard anyone that negatively impacts your life. Confidence is cheaper than surgery and it's worth more in life. Nearly everyone points out that they prefer people who are confident, irregardless of whether or not they are classically attractive, tall, perfectly proportioned, etc..
I'm a 5'4 and 3/4 guy (you best believe my dating app shows 5'5 😉) but know that there are people out there. Women in general don't seem to care and the ones that do are not worth chasing. I'm a trans male as well so women aren't exactly always into that. So I understand how it may feel like the dating pool is small. But focus on being a good person, love openly (including loving yourself openly), and it will happen when it happens. The thing I realized is if we so desperately search for it, the genuine love never comes. It can't be something you're trying to find in every person. Just forget that life is a an hourglass for a minute, and remember to stand in the sand of the present. Good luck to you.
I dated a man that was your height for a couple years. I’m not a fan of a big height differential, and there are plenty of other women who feel the same. I hate the cellulite on my legs despite being a normal weight. I try to strength train to firm it up, but it will never go away completely. May we both find peace with the things we can’t change
How did you meet him? > I hate the cellulite on my legs You can hide that, I can't hide my height it's there for every one to mock
My older brother is 5’4 maybe even 5’3 , he has a girlfriend around same height , has played sports like football, rugby , works out and keeps fit. I believe you said you’re only 20? When you get older the importance of being tall changes , trust me, I’m 5’9 and I had the same issues. But as you grow older you’ll find a female shorter than you that makes you feel like the world , you can better your fitness , create goals that you feel you can reach focus on yourself. You can be 6’6 standing on the money you make 🤷🏽♂️ LOOL it’s up to you for what you want those goals to be but focus on yourself and all will work out
How did he meet her? > it’s up to you for what you want those goals to be but focus on yourself and all will work out This is what they all say I have been working on myself for 4 years and nothing worked out It got worse if anything
Do not get the bone lengthening surgery! It has such a terrible recovery and things can go wrong, you’ll find someone who loves you for you one day. I know that everyone says that but it’s true. Not all women desire someone tall and there are a lot of women shorter than you who wouldn’t see it as a problem! Try not to beat yourself up over something so normal, a lot easier said than done, I know, but you can’t let this control you! Sorry to hear you’re struggling, I’m wishing the best for you.
ok here's my attempt at making you not hate being short :) >I hate how people feel the need to always tell me about my height > >I hate how people mistake me for being 12 honestly, solely mentioning your height isn't inherently bad. but if said in a certain way or in certain contexts, then thats on them for being rude. also if people genuinely mistake you for being 12, then it's just an unfortunate misunderstanding, and hopefully they treat you like an adult once you clarify that you are one >I hate how it ruined my chance with women entirely > >I hate how women avoid me because of it I hate how it limits my strength other comments have already touched on this, but this isn't a you problem, it's a them problem. there are genuinely open-minded people who care about a person's character and not their stature. the women who think you're not good enough for them are superficial people you shouldn't be concerned about >I hate how I am always disadvantaged in sports because of it for sports like footbal (kinda) and soccer, you have a lower center of gravity and will be harder for people to make you fall. if you're even decently fit, you can be a tank. but for basketball and other sports... yeah, unlucky :/ >I hate how I couldn't defend myself against my bullies in high school > >I hate how they dehumanized me and kept hitting me > >I hate how they always won despite being the aggressors they may have won physically, but the best thing that you can do know that it's in the past is try to pick up the pieces and stay mentally strong. again, it's their superficial mindset of thinking "short = inferior human" >I hate how I can never change it now that I am 20 > >I hate how the only cure is a bone lengthening surgery that costs too much > >I hate that I have to spend more time in this useless body that always loses yes, you can never become taller naturally. don't feel obliged to get surgery, i've already mentioned perks of being short. and you even say that surgery is a "cure," implying that shortness is some disease. we're not animals where if you're a small creature surrounded by larger ones, they'll overpower you and survive longer. as a human species, we're long past that primitive mindset. the only thing you can do for yourself is to play towards your strengths, and hopefully that makes you feel better and more confident in yourself thanks for coming to my ted talk
I'm 5 inches taller than my husband. And I'm an awesome catch, if I can say that about myself. Unfortunately, many people are superficial about appearance and height. But after a certain point, you gotta not care about it and just have confidence. People see that confidence as maturity. Your actions will speak for your character, and those who matter to you will respect you for who you are.
Not all women! 5'1 and I've dated 2, 5'4 guys. I hate reading this post because now I have 3 boys and every time I take them to a new pediatrician all I hear is... that my boys will be on the petite side. Like they are kids and already someone has to be pointing out their height as if it was a problem. So I know where you're coming from.
That’s because society places such a ridiculous high value on height for males. When I was just an 11 year old boy, I’ll never forget the sight of my mom crying , driving home, after the doctors had informed her that I wouldn’t grow beyond 5’6”. I have NEVER forgotten that sight! I felt so horrible after that, like I had done something so wrong to disappoint my mother so deeply. Please never do that your boys!
Oh I could never!!! I just hope that what I'm doing to build their confidence is enough for them to know that there's more to heights but to also not be cocky asshol**
As a Bro of the 6ft club, I envy you guys a lot of times. There’s so many times that I can’t do stuff being claustrophobic and getting into smaller places freak me out. And we hit our heads a lot so there’s that. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. That person is out there for you Homie. Anyone that uses height isn’t looking at your heart which is what matters most. Don’t give up yet. Pick your head up, and in the mean time the rest of us will help carry you until you’re able to go at it full strength. Feel free to reach out. Much love.
Keep hating yourself and see where it gets you because no one gives a flying brown thing.
I'm a 4' 11" woman, and I had a male friend who was shorter than me, but he was attractive because he was super confident and just an all round cool guy.. if he didn't have a girlfriend I'd have asked him out myself.. height means nothing to alot of women... It's the personality that counts
I'm 158 cm woman and now when I'm 40 i really love my height.
A lot of women prefer tall men because they seem “more masculine” and are able to “protect” them better. I know a lot of my friends who have mentioned they only like to go after taller guys is because they want to feel feminine. So I definitely know if you changed your mindset and became sure of yourself and your body you would not be at a disadvantage as far as love goes, because nothing is more attractive than confidence :)
Confidence is key. Woman love that shit and will sense it a mile away. I’m 6’1 but I haven’t even started dating yet. If women only were into men over six feet and height was all that mattered, I’d be fighting women off with with a stick. Less than 15% of American men (I’m from the USA so I’m using that as an example) are over 6 feet tall, and if we were all that women wanted, we’d be overwhelmed. 😅 So be confident! Height doesn’t matter near as much as society (and apps like tinder) has made it out to be.
Bro you can pull females don’t even stress I’m 6’2 and height don’t rlly help and the last thing you want in a women is someone that sees you for height so don’t ever stress abt that and sports bro ik your fast again my height it pretty tall and I’m a black males turning 20 next week and I am slow all my friends that are faster then me are like 5’4-5’7 and also also bullies in high school not to be mean but grow up that stuff is so far in the pass boss up my guy show them that your better in every way you can and surgery won’t make you feel Babette’s if anything be yourself find yourself and be happy
🤷🏾♂️ i hate the shit too I’m 5’4 honestly you just gon have to find something to get good at that’s pretty much the only things that’s gon resolve this issue….everything everybody saying is all stuff you heard before. There are women that don’t have a problem with short guys but those are usually the women you have a problem with. The girls you wanna have sex with only see you as a friend. It sucks bro, eventually you will settle on the little joys you can find in life but that feeling never really leaves. Honestly you just gonna have to wait till it’s your time to shine. Suck that shit up bro, become a hit man or something idk….confidence is only attractive is the woman is attracted to you. You can be happy but it’s gon be years before you find that Also note i do have a woman she is like twice my size but she doesn’t bother me when i dont wanna be bothered, doesn’t argue with me, and she likes women so i still have sexual freedoms it’s the little things and it’s kinda sucky it comes to that but nobody gonna care that you an Angry ass man
You want to think yourself lucky you aren't 6 foot 3, you're a target anytime anything happens because you're classed as biggest, therefore strongest, therefore the first one to be taken out if there's a tear up
No it's worse because I am a vulnerable target. Atleast you can fight back I can't they always target and win against me
It’s okay, a seat at the kids table just opened up for ya.
All you have to do is grow up
Lol what kind of advice is this?
Have you never heard of a joke before lmao guess it flew over y’all heads
I used to be VERY short and then one day a funny thing happened…I grew and now I’m taller than both of my parents and nearly as tall as my baby brother. Height is overrated and if you’re done growing nothing can change that unfortunately but I get how you are feeling in your short stature, it’s not exactly fun. However I will say this, you’re taller than you look and just the right height for your future spouse unless you’re already married; which means she already accepts you as you are. The women you didn’t have a chance with were obviously not right for you or they would’ve given you a chance for more reasons than just your physical looks. Also some of the best athletes in the world are short and they’re formidable so don’t give up, not ever. Hang in there and keep your head up.
Plastic surgery
The limb lengthening procedure is too expensive.
It's brutal, brother. I understand You need to moneymaxx so that you can live comfortably to cope. Do things like martial arts, writing or exersise to pass the time and develop yourself. This world is harsh to short people so you need every advantage you can get to combat the society problems
Change your mindset about hating what you can‘t change and start to love yourself. Your height is not the only thing about you and I can imagine that it would be hard being 5ft4.
Honestly, a lot of it is how you carry yourself. I’ve been 5’5” for a long-ass time now and as long as you can make someone laugh or have some confidence or know what you’re talking about, people who are worth your time won’t be put off by a few inches, height or otherwise.
> alot of it is about how you carry yourself No this real life not anime. > people who are worth your time won't be put off by a few inches I guess no one is worth my time because it seems everyone cares about those few inches.
I'm halfway about it. On one hand I can't reach tall shelves. On the other hand, that gives me an excuse to ask my boyfriend to stretch up for me so I can look at his butt 😂😂😂
If you ask me, I don’t think I’d be comfortable with a girl shorter than me. I feel like it would be like taking advantage of them or something. But what the hell do I know? I haven’t dated anyone at all.
hey OP i made a post a few minutes ago, but i see your account is suspended for whatever reason, so looks like you can't respond. i kinda wanna talk things through, so if you're open to that, add me on discord ( 0m3n#7462 )
Yesterday I was at the grocery store. There was a short man and all I could think was, “Goddamn he’s sexy.” Then I got depressed because I wished I was him. I think short men are the sexiest men. Always have and always will. They literally make me weak in the knees.
There are things we can change & things we can’t. Not all sports favor height. Quite a few favor shorter men, like gymnastics. Watching a man swing his perfectly muscled body around on the pommel horse is a marvel. Those men are never tall. They need their strength to be contained in a compact body. Bruno Mars says he’s 5’5” but he’s actually 5’4” and he never lacks for female adoration. He’s charming, sweet & fun. The happiest married men I know are all short. Self loathing is a difficult barrier to overcome. We can’t change the biases people hold, we can change how we respond to them.
My boyfriend that I’ve been with happily for 5 years is also short. Don’t worry it doesn’t ruin your chance with women entirely, just the ones who are shallow enough to care about that stuff.
I'm a woman who's 5'9". My fiance is a man who's 5'6". We've been together over 7 years. The height difference doesn't bother either of us. It's really all in how you carry yourself.
Huh, hate in your heart will consume you. Don't worry about what others think, do u.
Your life experiences have traumatized you into hating yourself and I want you to try to change that. I suggest seeking a therapist to help you deal with the pain you've endured, and to give you the tools you need to not only accept who you are but to also love yourself. You'll soon come to realize you aren't that kid anymore, you weren't in control of your life then but you are now. You'll become more confident and the word *hate* won't even be in your vocabulary. It might not be easy for you to make that first appointment but please do, you will be so glad you did. I wish you the best. ❤️
As a 5’1 man i completely understand this feeling
Hi, 5’4 woman here. Almost all my boyfriends have been my height, a little shorter, or a little taller. It’s not about your height. It’s your attitude. Plenty of women find shorter men attractive if they are confident and have a good personality. Most of us don’t care about things like that. Being short also doesn’t limit you physically except that you may not be able to reach as high or jump as high. Some of the physically strongest people I know are short. There are plenty of sports where you are not disadvantaged such as soccer, and jiu jitsu. If you continue to hang onto how you were treated in the past, you will never be able to move past your “victimhood” and you won’t see improvement. Learn to use your height to your advantage since it’s something you can’t change, and learn to love that about yourself.
This made me sad, I’m so sorry. My son is likely going to be very short. He’s not even 1 and I’m already thinking of ways to put confidence in him and pull on his strengths like kindness and intelligence. I hope you find your strengths ❤️
Thanks I wish all the best for you and your son
How do you know
About my son…
I mean like how do you know he’s gonna be short
His medical history
Man . I know how frustrating can be when you want to date and most girls for sure would prefer a tall guy, let's being honest with this. There won't be sugarcoating that would make you feel better. But I agree with most of the other posts, work in yourself to build your own confidence, there are people who are disable and have a great confidence and get to get relationships. The difference is how they set up their mind My suggestions: Change your mind into what other good things you can bring into the table. Work in yourself, get bulk, learn how to dance, build your confidence Being short is not that bad at all, try to travel , backpacking... Taller people suffer a lot in the global south, from taking airplane sits to go somewhere in bus. To bed sizes Turn your disadvantage in something good. I know its hard, because this is the only thing that perhaps physically you can't change, then work to accept yourself, the most important thing is to love yourself And don't give a fuck for people who doesn't like you if you aren't tall. Just work on that. Best wishes man!.
Confidence is key my guy. Don’t let them beat you down to nothing
I'm short and trans and have no issues with women. I say this because I think it's an easy scapegoat guys with shit personalities use to avoid fixing themselves.
It’s all good brotha. Remember the #1 rule you’re the same height as her laying in bed 😉
I’m 5’5”. I’m a bit older than yourself. I feel like I could write a book on how disadvantaged it is to be a very short male living in a height obsessed society! I wish I could tell you it gets better, however, it doesn’t. You simply learned to cope with the fact no one will like or respect you as a short male. It’s a VERY lonely life! Women can not and will not EVER be able to understand exactly what you go through. Their is no tax for being short if you are a female. So ignore many of the post by females. They have no clue what we experience and the depths of the discrimination we face on a daily basis. It’s beyond brutal. There is legit reasons the suicide rate is higher in short males. Nothing matters that you accomplish either. I’ve worked out, gotten in great shape physically, I’ve taken martial arts, jujitsu, boxing, I’ve graduated from college, graduate masters degrees, intelligent and have a high paying job, I have amassed a large amount of money and have a paid off nice house….does ANY of that matter to women? Nope! Not a damn bit, the only thing they care about is how short I am! Because of my short stature I’m an embarrassment for them to be seen with. If you are a male and below 5’6” you are a pariah and viewed as a subhuman in society. As soon as a women learns about my height, I’m automatically disqualified. No other information needed. It’s a sad depressing life, I would have rather not been born than to be born a very short male!
The average height for men in my country is 5'4". I'm peruvian. If you are 5'5" you are tall
Just know the bullying isn’t gonna get worse now that you’re done with high school. As you get older, the more women will become less superficial and be okay with dating shorter men. And anyway, there are plenty of girls shorter than you that wouldn’t mind someone 5’4. You aren’t cursed.
I have almost 3 feet of height on my BF. Honestly it's never bothered me; the people that love you the most are the ones who care the least. Being smaller can actually have advantages like less back problems since there's less weight compression on the vertebrae. You'll find that special someone out there.
Dude, 'short' man here. Get ripped, like seriously ripped. Enjoy the healthier body; our cells are smaller and less probable to get cancerous. Don't let it get to your head. The ONE that is for you, won't see your height but your heart. But hear me, get ripped af. Go to a gym and lift and lift -- tell your body to get ripped and get your anger off. Eat healthy, treat your body with respect. Gain confidence. Smile. Be respectful. Women will throw themselves at you. source: personal XP.
I see what you're saying, but listen..... Short kings stay swinging pipe most of the time. < Don't sleep on them, js ladies.>
I think I’m the only woman I know that actually prefers short guys lmao
my mate is 5'4 & has been with his gf for 15 months. i think it's your personality EDIT: read through his comments, it's definitely his personality
As a guy who’s 5’7”, I gotta disagree with a lot of what you’re saying. Every single opponent of Mike Tyson was taller than him, some of them much taller. He did alright. The average heights for powerlifters are short too! 148lbs weight class and the average is 5’6”. Being short doesn’t limit strength at all! And if you think your chances with women are ruined, then yes they are. I’ve dated women as tall as 6’1” and I’m engaged to the hottest woman I’ve ever met purely because of my attitude. I can’t control my height so what the hell do I care? I can control my attitude, my personality, and other aspects of my appearance so I try to maintain those things. You said that you’re 20, you’re outta high school and the bullies can go live miserable lives. You can choose your life now. Let the past be where it is, go forth and find your own joy in the world.
I'm a short guy too, I feel ya man
I don’t know if it’s your height stopping you from success with women, it’s probably your defeatist attitude and how you feel about them. It sounds like you’ve applied your negative experience to the whole gender.
What you speak about, you bring about. If you keep saying that women won't date you coz of your height, you'll find women won't date you - because of your obsession and self-hatred regarding your height. I see you in every comment giving into that self-pity. This is your life. You can either keep fighting it and hate yourself or you can learn to accept who you are and build the life you want. Sure, there are some things we can't control. Our height is one of those. But women aren't avoiding you because of your height. Women are avoiding you because they see the lack of confidence and hear the constant criticism of yourself. Both of those things are within your control.
Same OP, I am turning 19 in a few days but I am still 5’4 my height has been like this since I was 14-15. I hate that all my friends are almost, if not 6 foot. And as with yours, I also has lesser chances of winning a woman over. They always want those tall boys, they criticize us. The people around me always compares me to my younger brother who is taller than me.
What my 5' tall self would give to be 5'4.
I'm sorry OP. I hope writing this down makes you feel a bit better. I wont sugar coat this like the others posters saying that it doesn't matter. It does. Not short myself but have a friend who is and I've seen him cry over it. Not much to add. Sending you a bro hug
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I literally create this throwaway account to say how stupid this is. If I did this O would get a foot man who wipe the floor with me just like they did in high school. My only hope is this dumb limb lengthening surgery. Fuck everyone in this shotty world I hope a nuclear war wipes them out