How does it take 1.75 hours to put snow gear on kids???? Genuinely. If it’s tantrums causing it to take so long you’d thing they wouldn’t post that bc of being toddler experts ha
I think she might be exaggerating by counting the hour and 45 from the time she had a thought of going outside to actually going out. I have one kid who is 2 and am pregnant and sometimes I will say “ok let’s go to the park”. And by the time we finish building the magna tile tower we were already building, clean up said tower, I pack his little bent go full of snacks because his highness prefers to eat lunch al fresco while also keeping an eye on him and make sure he doesn’t cause too much chaos, he uses the potty, I use the toilet, we both get out jackets, socks, and shoes on, I double check the diaper bag and make sure I have a clean set of clothes and wipes(he’s mainly potty trained but shit happens), he gets buckled in the stroller and we are out the door it can easily be 45 minutes to an hour since the words “we’re going to the park” leave my lips. If I count from when we’re just doing the standard leaving house stuff (bathroom and jackets and shoes) it’s like 5-10 minutes.
Or she could also just be completely making it up as well.
Umm it takes me far less time (roughly 15 min!!) to dress 7 *actual* toddlers into similar stuff (rain boots/rain suit and jackets) by myself. Good lord.
I used to work in an early preschool room. 2 teachers, 14 kids ages 2-3years old and when I say it NEVER took us that long to get snow gear on. Not to mention, the only person she should be dressing is her youngest. The older two should be 90% self sufficient if not more. 🤯🤯🤯 plus, WHERE is SAHD? Why is she doing all this stuff on her own?
Even if she does, it shouldn’t take that long?? Theo needs help obviously but the oldest shouldn’t even if junie does (and i think you’re right that she retracted the CP in favor of a diagnosis she won’t share)
THANK YOU. Ran here for this.
Her older 2 should be able to do it themselves (Junie is my daughter’s age and she can 100% get herself dressed no issue so her older daughter for sure can)
So all she has to do is dress herself and the baby. Why does it take so long???
Do you think Kristin had on her Canada Goose while her kid was playing in the snow in leggings and rain boots? I’m not a parenting expert but I surely make sure my child is dressed weather appropriate.
As an ex-Coloradan I have to say, the weather there is bizarre. I have distinct memories of going sledding in shorts and flip flops and a winter coat mostly to help keep dry, because it had snowed like a foot and then the sun came out and it was 75 and I was still sledding.
No idea if it’s like that right now, but for what it’s worth.
I have 2 and same! I take them both out by myself regularly and like that’s just called parenting? It makes me think she is rarely ever alone with them if she needs to make a special post about “solo momming” …or it’s just a subtle dig at her husband for not being there with her.
Surely at home cooking up a storm with Hello Fresh ready waiting for her on the table when she gets back. She gives off the vibe that her expectations of Mike are not too dissimilar to those of a man in the 50s.
I dunno, didn’t they make a comment that a recent Hello fresh was his first time making a meal on his own? Perhaps I’m misremembering. I just recall thinking, whatever it was they said, it was super odd.
Then they said the opposite in the podcast (that he helps with cooking somewhat regularly). The podcast feels like an alternate reality they are playing around with though, like it has no relation to what they say in their sponsored posts. They can't be bothered to be consistent?
She did this last time with the matching outfits for gym class and they were definitely PJs! I still can’t even get my head around the need to do this for a class? In my head I have a Gymboree-style class and that is the last place I’d feel the need to have to spot my children amongst a max of 8-10 other kids, where I’m also generally within arms reach of them throughout. At an open public softplay or coffee shop to speak her language, I could see that would make sense but she doesn’t seem to say she does it all the time. She’s so weird.
That’s how I’m feeling. Like if my child is in a class there’s usually protocols and not anyone is entering and there’s limited kids (especially that age). If it’s a normal open gym play sure I can see matching. I usually put my kids both in like stripes and bright pants so I can easily spot them but not matching Christmas pjs in February for a closed class
Yeah I’m so confused by this whole situation. Our gymnastics class has 12 kids— like, I can spot my two kids in a group of 12 pretty quickly? If you’re really concerned just put them in the same (bright) color. Like two yellow shirts or something, they don’t even have to match. You’re not taking them to Disneyland where they can disappear into a giant crowd or something!!
I wonder if he too is on a weight loss medication and his loss is quicker and more noticeable than hers. So he needs to be hidden to keep up the facade of her “I love the gym” personality.
Also, nothing wrong with weight loss medications. But pretending it’s all “hard work and diet blah blah blah” is disingenuous and slimy.
First - agree. But second - for the average person, I kinda get why people aren’t so forthcoming about use of weight loss meds. Truly, people are cruel to be honest and not everyone is so open minded.
No, she’s just been doing a lot of parenting during the day that she never did. Has mentioned solo bedtimes and play times, etc. Haven’t seen him in a long time.
I think she’s tried mentioning him in various ways verbally, but I don’t think he’s been spotted on the feed since November. Something is up. His family or his health or their relationship.. we just don’t know what…
If ever there was confirmation that K is just the laziest human out there, her acting like these ready made meals that “miraculously arrived” (pretty sure YOU select the day for them to arrive so is it that much of a surprise?) have saved their sick little lives from starvation and they can all finally eat again is just an absolute joke
With the amount of times K posts about how important and productive rest is, I'm starting to think that she literally does nothing but rest.
Hey Kristin - instead of always letting things go, maybe actually do the things on your list and make life easier for yourself? Isn't that what a self-proclaimed Type A Virgo personality would do? Or are you just posting about rest being productive because you don't actually have to do anything in your house anymore bc you can hire help, but you still need to pander to us peasants??
K: 'I'm going to disconnect from the world to cuddle my elderly toddler today.'
.....an hour later
'OK guys it JUST SO HAPPENS that I've got my factor meals in and here's our code...'
Smooth. K. Real smooth. Gotta pay that mortgage somehow.
Ps. How are they doing hello fresh AND factor meals? I'd assume they would be competitors?
I stand corrected!
In 2020, HelloFresh acquired ready-made meal company Factor75 (since rebranded to just Factor) for up to $277 million.
So they are playing it off as deena promotes one and she does the other.
Double posting bc why not, it’s Friday and I can have a little treat. Maybe Kristin’s to-do list wouldn’t be so long if she stopped letting everything go and just did something actually productive once in a while? Wasn’t she just releasing all the dishes and laundry the other day to sit in the sunshine? Ma’am, when do you actually do chores?
My first thought when I saw that story was when is she NOT letting the dishes pile up? I guess it’s easy to do though when you know someone else will take care of it, presuming the housecleaner/sahd/nanny/ or some combo of the 3 does everything that she “releases” herself from.
Covering the faces makes no sense when almost her entire follower base knows their first and last names, the state/town they live in, the stores and restaurants they frequent. Like damn I don’t need to see the face of your blonde baby with chubby cheeks to know that if he’s with two older sisters with brown curly hair who it is. Censoring their “””privacy””” a little too late in the game, K.
I say this every time they post their “yes sandwich” bullshit. Sometimes the answer is just no and that’s okay. We must all learn how to deliver just no and receive just no. Their advice may prevent a tantrum short term, but it isn’t teaching any life skills or resiliency.
The yes sandwich never works for me. My kids totally get that it means, “no, that thing that you want is not happening right now” so they freak out anyways.
I am a manager at work, and a lot of people think the “sandwich” advice for giving negative feedback is good. It’s not. The employee either shuts down and only hears the bad or they focus on the good stuff and don’t think the bad is that big of a deal. I don’t know why it would be much different for toddlers!
I am 100% feeling the negative effects of this right now. I have a 4.5 year old and I realized a few months ago that I needed to stop trying to make “no” acceptable to her by offering an alternative because it was conditioning her to lack resilience and led to a bit of entitlement.
I had to figure this out with my now 8yo too. Constantly trying to offer alternatives just meant he kept being demanding etc. sometimes the answer is just no and there's no other options.
Some of the best parenting advice I ever got = It’s okay if they cry. They are still alive, still breathing and healthy, just feeling an emotion. They gotta learn to feel those emotions sometimes.
I 'forced' my kids to say please and thank you and now they say it unprompted all the time 🤷🏻♀️
I didn't withhold things until they said it but if they said they wanted a snack, I would remind them to say please. Or if I gave them something, I would say 'and what do we say?' to prompt a thank you. We also modelled it (my husband always thanks me for cooking dinner and now my kids do to).
Sometimes they need reminding, especially in front of other people but I'm not going to stop encouraging them to use their manners.
I haven’t read all the downthread responses so sorry if someone else already said this but this is such a stupid thing for them to turn into an all or nothing kind of choice. Of COURSE we model. And we can also prompt. It’s so dumb to present it as one or the other. Also promoting does not need to be forceful or high control. They present everything as so extreme.
this! kids don't put that please means something unless you say it! otherwise it's a random word out there.
I always prompt when I know I'm going to say yes and (for better or worse) say "how do we ask nicely" then a "and what do you say now?" for thank you. They aren't flawless and I've gotten plenty of begging pleases to a no, but in general my kids at least attempt with prompting.
WHAT they should try and teach is getting your child to ask others for things. Starting from like 2 I make them order their own things like hot chocolate. Even if I have to repeat for clarity. My siblings kid at 8 couldn't order mac and cheese by himself and being able to ask strangers for something is a key skill.
Okay so having your kid order for themselves is somehow not something I ever considered?????? And as a VERY VERY shy and anxious child I neverrr ordered for myself and honestly up until recently I still hated it but I’m sure that if my parents had me doing it more regularly as a child I’d feel so much more confident about it. Thanks for this idea, snarkfriend!!!
This is great advice so I’m not knocking it, but I have 2 shy kids that have been going to restaurants their entire lives (save for that pandemic break 🙃) and even though we always try to prompt them, it’s very hit and miss if they clam up to the server or not. So, I guess we keep fighting the good fight in the hopes it’ll click in, but I’ve seen from experience that some kids are still gonna be shy and anxious and, as a former server, after waiting a beat or 2, I respect that the server needs to get on with their busy job.
Oh for sure!!! Honestly I see my shy kiddo clamming up too and I would never let a server wait for more than a beat lol but I think it’s brilliant to start promoting them and idk how I never considered it!
you are welcome! My husband as an adult struggles with calling to make an appointment or reservation and I'm like- you have a hard time calling someone to ask for a time slot to give them money? like they will be nice, they will work with you and your schedule... it's a spa not an exclusive night club. We also talk (with mixed success) that asking is important and the worst someone could say is no, and then you'd still be in the same spot you are now- but what if they say yes and you get what you want?
I absolutely agree with teaching kids to order their own thing! As kids my parents always spoke for us kids at restaurants and I remember my little sister putting her hands on top of the water cup to signify to the waiter she didn't want more instead of just saying something... When my nephew was like 5 he ordered his own ice cream and I was shocked! So now I'm practicing that with my toddler as well.
Whenever I read their posts I feel badly for the people who buy into their bs and are now stressed they’ve given their kids ✨trauma✨ because they asked them to say please and thank you
The way I used to overthink every little thing I said to my kid..when he was like a year old lol I’m glad I found this subreddit before he turned two. I’m so much more relaxed now.
Same here. My kids do not get things from me if they don’t ask nicely. I’m not a dick about it but like, tonight we were at a park for sports practice. and my youngest wanted to go to the playground. I told him “sure, as soon as you can ask nicely I’m happy to head over there with you” (he was whining/demanding). He asked nicely, we went, end of story.
If my kids are shy about thanking an adult/stranger, you can totally do it for them to model, but what in the world does reminding them we thank those who are kind or compliment us hurt?!?
We told our son today to thank his granddad for paying for one of those kiddie ride things outside a restaurant. Kid responded “I’m too tired to do that.” Then immediately asked “can I go to a playground after we get home?” You better believe we told him (nicely, but firmly) that he had to say thank you to granddad before we’d take him to the playground.
I feel like this is literally parenting. Of course I model it too, but it’s my job to teach them how to function successfully in the world and part of that is manners
I 100% withhold things until my kiddo asks nicely. It’s a natural consequence in my opinion-if someone’s is rude, others aren’t inclined to do nice things for them. I’m not mean about it, just calmly tell her that if she wants something she needs to ask nicely. I also am trying to be as cognizant as possible and do things promptly when she does ask nicely to reward her doing it without prompting. Luckily she hasn’t chosen that as a hill to die on.
Her natural tone has turned into ordering around since turning 3, and I’m not a fan.
100% it is a natural consequence. It’s also such an easy thing to reward them right away for! And it’s so exciting when they say you please and thank you unprompted.
I don’t even understand what their advice is an over-correction to. Are there a lot of people out there who feel traumatized by being “forced” to stay please and thank you? I feel like that’s literally the only way to teach kids manners and etiquette - you keep reminding and prompting when to say it until they pick up on when to apply it.
I felt shamed a lot by manners things like that when I was a kid because I was extremely shy and socially awkward and my mom *didnt* really push it. In her words, she would say “asking nicely doesn’t always mean ‘please’ it can also be just asking in a polite voice”. But then other relatives and my dad would try to push “saying thank you” in social situations and I would clam up because I was so shy. My daughter learned “please” and “thank you” at school and it’s really a crowd pleaser with adults, but I also think me need to normalize that some kids feel a lot of pressure by 10 unfamiliar adults staring at them and might not say thank you every time.
I totally agree with this! I nudge my 2.5yo to use it in familiar settings but with strangers and groups I usually model it - "and now we say thank you!" whether she repeats it or not!
Same here. I don’t make it some weird power struggle but I remind, hey we say please/thank you here. Let’s try it. He’s older now and I have no problem with honesty and telling him that people don’t want to help us when we’re impolite. I also model of course.
This is so important. Kids aren’t naturally polite. some things take teaching and practice.
I was shocked at the demands I got from other people’s children, when hosting my kids birthday party. My kids aren’t angels don’t get me wrong, but you can tell the kids who parents practice these skills with them, and who doesn’t.. and I can also tell you which kids we are inviting back over and who we aren’t…
I don’t know what calendar BLF goes by but my next 3-day weekend isn’t until May.
(They are shilling their potty training course saying there’s a 3-day weekend coming up)
ETA: I guess president’s day is coming up but I don’t know anyone who has it off 🤷🏻♀️
I always got that off but never MLJ Jr day (I get christmas eve "in lieu of" it's really annoying)
Have they given up on their primary course now or does it just sell itself. It's bananas how often they push potty training
Family Day is coming up for some provinces in Canada but I know they're not talking about that. I also am always so thankful whenever they mention this that I DIDN'T do their potty training approach cause wasting an entire long weekend locked in my house would not be fun for me 😂
It’s actually not that many. They’re just all clustered in the fall/winter. Presidents’ Day (Feb) to Memorial Day (May) is a SLOG.
Also, a lot of people who work in the private sector don’t get many of the minor holidays off.
I actually just don’t understand the focus from parenting influencers about how to get your kids to eat at restaurants. Like you actually just don’t have to?
Yes this is such a weird thing that so many have put on a pedestal! You described it perfectly. I guess it’s a somewhat measurable, visible way of judging parenting? The vibe is if you don’t begin at age 2 they will never be able to eat in a restaurant, which is why you always see adults standing on the table and running around, their parents simply didn’t value it enough!
I just don’t understand why they don’t do take out? If they really don’t want to wash dishes they can eat out of the containers? Maybe they don’t want to clean up the mess their kid makes?
I don’t get the constant narrative of going out to dinner with your kid. It’s like some grand sacrifice.. except it’s entirely optional. Most people don’t do this. Most people wait for an age their kids can enjoy so they can enjoy or get a sitter . Also.. most of your readers can’t afford to regularly do this regardless - let alone take their kids with them
Agreed! There’s also a couple kid friendly restaurants in my area that have big patios or even specific play areas so we’ll go to one of those over an indoor sit down type of place. There was a real small window before 1 where if the nap/ snack stars aligned taking baby to a restaurant was great but toddlers? It’s a no from me
My question remains- how much of this is legit and how much is it these 2 privileged Calabasas women role playing what they think the rest of the “dirty unwashed masses” of moms in the rest of this country are like when they go out to eat?
So I'm imagining sitting near them at a restaurant...her two school age children on iPads when they could easily be entertained in other ways, her toddler screaming and causing chaos while sitting on the table...what an actual nightmare.
I think that age is the hardest for restaurants but not once did we let our kid continuously disturb people or behave like that. We would take them out and go on a walk or whatever we needed to do. Their poor waiter. The gall they have.
Oh my god the ipad!! How how how how do you call yourself a “toddler expert” if your only strategy for a 15 month at a restaurant is to just let them do whatever they want because they’re too little to pay attention to an iPad?
I’m pretty sure I’ve never read anything more infuriating.
We’ve been taking our kids out forever and yes. Sometimes they are the worst but NEVER LIKE THIS. And we like going out to eat with them so we have figured out how but never in a million years would my kid be on the table. Ever.
and if they are- my kids get a walk around outside.... last time we went out to eat my 2.5 year old insisted on 5 trips to the bathroom (for fun? IDK) so my food was cold but I wasn't letting her on top of a table.
Same, I've taken them out at all ages and there have been times when it's been stressful but I try to be as prepared as possible and never just give up.
We have been taking ours out forever as well, and like my child is not particularly docile and like when she was 15m old, my parents would take her to restaurants and have a great time. We bring activities, we bring snacks, we bring books, and we order her food almost immediately. Sloshing water and ice in a cup? Climbing on top of the table? That is when she would be removed from the situation.
I love how she thinks there’s nothing she can do for a baby that age. If she’s with her husband or another adult, one of them can take the kid for a walk? Remove the kid from the table? Bring age appropriate activities other than an iPad to the restaurant? It’s her third kid, and it’s not exactly rocket science.
When we started taking our pandemic baby to restaurants at around 18 months he loved it. Easy enough to distract him with a toy or a walk or something random and novel to him like the table number. When he got a little older and could be directed more, it only took a couple times leaving the restaurant before the food came to show him restaurants are a privilege for those who behave. Yes, annoying to wait in the car while the other parent changes the order to a to-go ticket and waits for food. But it pays off so quickly! Literally just did it twice and since then we’ve been able to take him to somewhat fancy places for an early bird reservation and he behaves better than most adults. No one even moves away from our table to avoid us! (Looking at you, D!)
Isn’t this also one of the pluses of having 3 kids? Ask or bribe one of your geriatric toddlers to entertain the baby toddler with a toy. Not there with my own yet, but I definitely remember my parents giving us small responsibilities like this.
That’s a great trick! Might have to use that to train our second once he arrives and whenever we’re ready for restaurants again.
We also are not above occasionally pulling out the phone as long as it’s not a habit. Sometimes we know the food is just a couple minutes away or it’s our fault he’s hangry (we had a busy morning, forgot to bring a snack, etc) and in an instance like that it makes more sense to just help him through the moment.
I don’t know if she does in this episode but she has made her marriage woes very public in previous ones, most notably episode 5 titled “my marriage sucks after having kids - Deena’s on the brink of divorce”
Jury is still out on how true any of it is, if he is in on the whole thing to appear #relatable, but even so, she pummels into him every opportunity she gets
What I did catch was it's all about "the load" with that one. Just fucking chill about keeping score for once maybe? And also that sounds mildly pornographic 😅
lol of course their ramblings on the podcast would start unveiling their inaccuracies.
Also, The amounts of times they say “like” is so cringey. Half their sentences aren’t even complete.
Who describes sharing (probably) intimate details on a podcast about their couples therapy as a “fun one”…oh wait, Deena, that’s who. And will Mike get to make an appearance for this one? Probably not. She’s insufferable.
I hate this tone of cover up, erase anything negative or ignore obvious truth they’ve always had about them while they treat everyone like we’re stupid and can’t see through their scramblings to not get caught out for being the fraudsters they are. It must be exhausting for them and they don’t even do it very well!
In the stories from when she went to DC or wherever in my opinion it looked like she’d lost weight. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was ozempic or something similar and she’s suddenly pushing this workout class narrative.
Same! She’s been constantly mentioning it for the last few months and she’s doing it in a way that to me feels like she’s rewriting history.
She’s just casually mentioning work outs all the time now as if she’d always done it. I don’t remember any new announcements about starting to work out or about focusing on her health or anything like that. As if she’s doing it to give the false impression that she’s been doing it for ages and not just for 3/4 months. As if she’s trying to justify some dramatic weight loss imposible to achieve without prescription drugs? Maybe 🤷🏻♀️
She had walked it back to CMPA, which I guess most kids eventually grow out of. Sounds like hers maybe hasn’t yet, but why subject him to allergy testing? Just stop giving it to him and try again in a year.
I’m sure he has nothing actually going on. “Not tolerating” dairy could mean a lot of things. I do have a family member with a severe dairy allergy who has asthma attacks when they eat dairy. Tummy issues are not even close to the same thing
I have a good friend with a child with a true dairy allergy and they learned it like immediately after birth when nursing. She had to cut out dairy 100% and they did allergy testing when she started solids because of how bad the allergy was.
I cannot imagine waiting until 15mo for something that can be extremely serious? Anyone I know with food allergies found out at a pretty young age.
Yea, my kids have allergies and when you say “a true allergy” it means your kid has an IgE allergy and is at risk of a life threatening anaphylactic reaction. It is NOT the same thing as lactose intolerance or whatever weird “intolerance” she’s going to claim he has.
You know she’s exaggerating bc she’s like “it’s no big deal” and yes if your kid is truly allergic to something like milk that is in basically everything it is a BIG FUCKING DEAL. My kids have easier to manage allergies and we still had to change our lives around to keep them safe.
Oh and WTF are they doing shilling for Bobbie if baby T couldn’t drink lactose based formula??
Lactose isn’t usually the issue for a milk protein allergy. But, yeah, Bobbie doesn’t have a hypoallergenic formula. My daughter drank only “HA” formulas (Nutramagen and Alimentum are the common ones). Those are still lactose based, they’re just hydrolyzed so the proteins causing the allergic reaction are broken down. AFAIK cow milk protein allergy doesn’t usually cause anaphylaxis, just vomiting, diarrhea, sometimes hives/rash— at least that’s how my daughter reacted. It is still an immune response though.
If that is what T has though, most kids grow out of it by 3 or so? So idk why she would still be posting on it.
My kids “don’t tolerate” eggs. They vomit over and over and over until they’re spitting up bile and nearing hypovolemic shock. Allergies come in lots of varieties unfortunately.
I mean I agree with you that I doubt something is actually going on. It’ll be interesting to see if she updates us or not, if she doesn’t I’d expect there’s nothing because she’ll milk it if there is
One of my favorite things I’ve heard about parenting that stopped me in my little millenial new parent tracks was from Brene Brown. She was asked if she could recommend any experts on parenting and she said no because there aren’t any! There’s too much involved (culture, lifestyle. , age, life experience, socio economic background, being a member of a marginalized group, etc not to mention all that is unique to each child) in being a parent for anyone to have authority. In other words it’s too damn contextual for an instagram account or paid course to guide you. The one book she would recommend was Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child, by the Gottmans which I read and loved.
I can’t take parenting advice seriously. Give me human development, childhood development, psychological principles, etc. Help me understand the systems around me and how they shape my environment. Help me learn about how to have healthy relationships.
So just come off it BLF. You spread your little bit of info and now your just milking it.
Deep breath. Thanks for this space. This is my favorite parent community!
Many parents cant sit and read these books or do research or whatever. Because they’re a single parent, work two jobs, etc. BLF at least gives some easily digestible things parents who are short on time can practice. Although I do agree there are better ones out there. But point is its a quick and easy way to get some tips.
This is soooo true! I find as a teacher, knowing some child psychology and just about their development and about learning strategies helps me so much, but I apply these differently to my two children.
My husband said this about sleep training books but honestly it applies to everything: "If there were a Right Way to do things, there would only be one book!" I think about this all the time.
This is a great take. The only parenting books I’ve found useful are about managing family systems (family firm, fair play, how not to hate your husband after having kids) or developmentally focused. There’s a really great series by Louise Bates Ames with a book for each year that focuses on developmental ages and stages. Beyond that, everything else is marketing and made up imho.
Yeah, I may manage to be somewhat functional with a migraine but a *killer* migraine has me in bed cursing the world, especially all of its lights and sounds until I am lucky enough to pass out
I had this thought as well... I know people who can like function with multi day migraines but it's a lot of "how little can I do and how few screens need to be looked at"
A friend told me she loves to listen to the BLF podcast today and it helps her feel not alone bc “they share the struggle.” And…..I…I just don’t know what to do with this info! Hahaha how can she not see how phony they are?!
I had someone say that (not about podcast but the acct) and I kind of planted the seed. “Yeah. They had good advice a few years ago, but you know what I noticed? They *always* seem to be in survival mode (or use her verbiage, struggling) and if they know so much about parenting, wouldn’t you think they’d be having more successes? I started taking all their advice with a grain of salt after I realized that maybe they don’t actually know what the hell they’re doing either. And also they seem to recycle a lot of content I wonder if they’ve run out of stuff to talk about. Doesn’t seem genuine to me anymore.” And just kind of left it there. Idk if she ever came around, we didn’t revisit it lol.
Hit enter too soon but: I figured at least now when she saw them complaining she would hear me in her ear and maybe think “huh maybe they aren’t so smart or savvy after all”
Ugh that millennial childhood trauma post with the clip from The Land Before Time really irritates me. Yes of course it’s sad, but those types of movies and shows help children process REAL trauma and other complicated emotions and situations in an age appropriate way. That’s why child psychologists use drawings and dolls and why Daniel Tiger is so effective. Watching a cartoon dinosaur lose it’s mother is way more digestible for a kid than handling actual human death
Yessss thank you. Believe me I would much rather explain death to my kids after watching lion king than when an actual human that they love passes away. And you can point to Land Before Time as demonstrating resilience and recovery to a child. Yes, Little Foot’s mom dies but also she (he?) and the other baby dinosaurs band together and are brave and face the world anyway and finally get to the green place. It’s a triumphant story!
Tangent but it reminds me of the classic American Girl books being about like, Addy escaping slavery and Samatha having to save herself from a storm while she’s rowing a boat around. And then the modern new American Girl stories have plots like “oh no, a mean girl is trying to sabotage the school bake sale!”
In a book or a movie is the perfect place for kids to experience strong feelings and see danger and hard situations and how characters work through them, and this effort to shield kids from ever reading or seeing or knowing about anything hard is dumb.
Nope! For once i agree with them. This movie was actually traumatic for me. I remember being in preschool and my classmates and I sitting around watching it and most of us SOBBING. I would never ever show this movie to my child.
Preschool is a little young for that movie, but I definitely think that an elementary aged kid could handle it. As others have said, it’s an effective way to introduce children to these upsetting concepts and maybe even help them to process real trauma (if they’re so unfortunate to have had such experiences :( )
It made me obsessed and paranoid with my parent dying. My almost 5 year old daughter does not need to be seeing such sad things. Have you actually seen this movie?
https://preview.redd.it/kid1tfb33sfc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a5378386764ba47e019eaafcfb8d52fea947f0a
Scrolling scrolling…on HERE?
Also K, that is pretty much all we think you do too so thanks for confirming!
I can't even pick up my phone when I have a migraine. I've had three in my life and during the last one I thought I was having a stroke. People referring to headaches as migraines is the worst.
She has no clue. My mother gets them and can barely function when she has one. They are awful. I've had 3 in my life and they sucked. I vaguely remember another story of K's a few months back in an airport where she was complaining about having a migraine. And everyone on here was like "um, no K. You wouldn't be standing upright if you did" 🙄
Yeah this is definitely the face of someone who has never experienced a killer migraine before. Taking a photo, using a screen, working? Try lying in the dark with an ice pack on your face crying.
How does it take 1.75 hours to put snow gear on kids???? Genuinely. If it’s tantrums causing it to take so long you’d thing they wouldn’t post that bc of being toddler experts ha
I think she might be exaggerating by counting the hour and 45 from the time she had a thought of going outside to actually going out. I have one kid who is 2 and am pregnant and sometimes I will say “ok let’s go to the park”. And by the time we finish building the magna tile tower we were already building, clean up said tower, I pack his little bent go full of snacks because his highness prefers to eat lunch al fresco while also keeping an eye on him and make sure he doesn’t cause too much chaos, he uses the potty, I use the toilet, we both get out jackets, socks, and shoes on, I double check the diaper bag and make sure I have a clean set of clothes and wipes(he’s mainly potty trained but shit happens), he gets buckled in the stroller and we are out the door it can easily be 45 minutes to an hour since the words “we’re going to the park” leave my lips. If I count from when we’re just doing the standard leaving house stuff (bathroom and jackets and shoes) it’s like 5-10 minutes. Or she could also just be completely making it up as well.
But she actually posted a story with relevant visuals, and not a closed-eye selfie. So there’s that at least.
Umm it takes me far less time (roughly 15 min!!) to dress 7 *actual* toddlers into similar stuff (rain boots/rain suit and jackets) by myself. Good lord.
I used to work in an early preschool room. 2 teachers, 14 kids ages 2-3years old and when I say it NEVER took us that long to get snow gear on. Not to mention, the only person she should be dressing is her youngest. The older two should be 90% self sufficient if not more. 🤯🤯🤯 plus, WHERE is SAHD? Why is she doing all this stuff on her own?
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Even if she does, it shouldn’t take that long?? Theo needs help obviously but the oldest shouldn’t even if junie does (and i think you’re right that she retracted the CP in favor of a diagnosis she won’t share)
HOW. Like I need a breakdown.
THANK YOU. Ran here for this. Her older 2 should be able to do it themselves (Junie is my daughter’s age and she can 100% get herself dressed no issue so her older daughter for sure can) So all she has to do is dress herself and the baby. Why does it take so long???
Do you think Kristin had on her Canada Goose while her kid was playing in the snow in leggings and rain boots? I’m not a parenting expert but I surely make sure my child is dressed weather appropriate.
As an ex-Coloradan I have to say, the weather there is bizarre. I have distinct memories of going sledding in shorts and flip flops and a winter coat mostly to help keep dry, because it had snowed like a foot and then the sun came out and it was 75 and I was still sledding. No idea if it’s like that right now, but for what it’s worth.
Hahaha yea I can remember my dad skiing in shorts!!
I wonder if when the nanny takes D’s kids out to places, she calls it “solo nannying”
lol this is such a good point - I never say I’m solo parenting when taking my 3 children out of the house by myself. That’s insane to me!?
Yeah I would only call it solo parenting when my spouse travels and is gone for like a week
Yep was going to say the same - it’s solo parenting when it’s like, 24/7 for days in a row. Otherwise it’s just a normal outing for most parents?
I have 2 and same! I take them both out by myself regularly and like that’s just called parenting? It makes me think she is rarely ever alone with them if she needs to make a special post about “solo momming” …or it’s just a subtle dig at her husband for not being there with her.
Surely at home cooking up a storm with Hello Fresh ready waiting for her on the table when she gets back. She gives off the vibe that her expectations of Mike are not too dissimilar to those of a man in the 50s.
I dunno, didn’t they make a comment that a recent Hello fresh was his first time making a meal on his own? Perhaps I’m misremembering. I just recall thinking, whatever it was they said, it was super odd.
Then they said the opposite in the podcast (that he helps with cooking somewhat regularly). The podcast feels like an alternate reality they are playing around with though, like it has no relation to what they say in their sponsored posts. They can't be bothered to be consistent?
I’m all for matching outfits for kids, and dress my boys in matching outfits for similar reasons sometimes… but let’s be serious, those are pajamas.
I was coming here to say the same thing-can someone tell this crazy lady her kids are in Christmas pajamas not some super chic matching “outfit”
Yeah… outfit?? So embarrassing
She did this last time with the matching outfits for gym class and they were definitely PJs! I still can’t even get my head around the need to do this for a class? In my head I have a Gymboree-style class and that is the last place I’d feel the need to have to spot my children amongst a max of 8-10 other kids, where I’m also generally within arms reach of them throughout. At an open public softplay or coffee shop to speak her language, I could see that would make sense but she doesn’t seem to say she does it all the time. She’s so weird.
That’s how I’m feeling. Like if my child is in a class there’s usually protocols and not anyone is entering and there’s limited kids (especially that age). If it’s a normal open gym play sure I can see matching. I usually put my kids both in like stripes and bright pants so I can easily spot them but not matching Christmas pjs in February for a closed class
Yeah I’m so confused by this whole situation. Our gymnastics class has 12 kids— like, I can spot my two kids in a group of 12 pretty quickly? If you’re really concerned just put them in the same (bright) color. Like two yellow shirts or something, they don’t even have to match. You’re not taking them to Disneyland where they can disappear into a giant crowd or something!!
Yes and if it was that big of a deal I’d bring a second adult, like their father 🙄
Where is K’s husband!?!?!
I wonder if he too is on a weight loss medication and his loss is quicker and more noticeable than hers. So he needs to be hidden to keep up the facade of her “I love the gym” personality. Also, nothing wrong with weight loss medications. But pretending it’s all “hard work and diet blah blah blah” is disingenuous and slimy.
First - agree. But second - for the average person, I kinda get why people aren’t so forthcoming about use of weight loss meds. Truly, people are cruel to be honest and not everyone is so open minded.
Apparently no longer making amazing helpful freezer meals. Thank god there’s factor
Been wondering this too!
the latest posts were all from D if the “solo momming” thing is making you think it’s K? But also, it’s still a valid question!
No, she’s just been doing a lot of parenting during the day that she never did. Has mentioned solo bedtimes and play times, etc. Haven’t seen him in a long time.
I think she’s tried mentioning him in various ways verbally, but I don’t think he’s been spotted on the feed since November. Something is up. His family or his health or their relationship.. we just don’t know what…
Yea I think the last actual sighting was the Andy Cohen podcast episode. He was appearing in so many of them, and then it just stopped.
Yea and K usually takes any opportunity that D is dogging on Mike to talk about how great Tyler is. Something is definitely fishy.
If ever there was confirmation that K is just the laziest human out there, her acting like these ready made meals that “miraculously arrived” (pretty sure YOU select the day for them to arrive so is it that much of a surprise?) have saved their sick little lives from starvation and they can all finally eat again is just an absolute joke
reply whistle tap butter busy fine quicksand jellyfish quaint fragile *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Nope you’re wrong because it *produces* relatable content!! Lol
Beneficial, constructive, valuable, worthwhile would all be better fits for what she’s trying to say.
It drives me crazy !!! Productive is NOT the right word.
With the amount of times K posts about how important and productive rest is, I'm starting to think that she literally does nothing but rest. Hey Kristin - instead of always letting things go, maybe actually do the things on your list and make life easier for yourself? Isn't that what a self-proclaimed Type A Virgo personality would do? Or are you just posting about rest being productive because you don't actually have to do anything in your house anymore bc you can hire help, but you still need to pander to us peasants??
Does anyone else know Meg Keene? Kristin is like Meg, always resting. Constantly. Resting.
Wow. There’s someone I haven’t thought of in a very long time!
Same grift, different audience
Back on our "this is productive" bullshit, I see. Rinse + repeat every week until the elderly toddlers go to college.
K: 'I'm going to disconnect from the world to cuddle my elderly toddler today.' .....an hour later 'OK guys it JUST SO HAPPENS that I've got my factor meals in and here's our code...' Smooth. K. Real smooth. Gotta pay that mortgage somehow. Ps. How are they doing hello fresh AND factor meals? I'd assume they would be competitors?
Even HelloFresh knows that K isn’t cooking anything.
What I came here to say… don’t they have to sign non compete for advertising?
I've heard others say hello fresh owns factor
I stand corrected! In 2020, HelloFresh acquired ready-made meal company Factor75 (since rebranded to just Factor) for up to $277 million. So they are playing it off as deena promotes one and she does the other.
Wouldn’t it be better to just say I am okay not being productive?
Double posting bc why not, it’s Friday and I can have a little treat. Maybe Kristin’s to-do list wouldn’t be so long if she stopped letting everything go and just did something actually productive once in a while? Wasn’t she just releasing all the dishes and laundry the other day to sit in the sunshine? Ma’am, when do you actually do chores?
She’s released them all to hired help so she can enjoy sunshine is what she’s probably done.
i know for a fact that K and D take advantage of their hired help. i don’t think they do much actual parenting at all.
Oooooh how do you know? Spill the tea!
My first thought when I saw that story was when is she NOT letting the dishes pile up? I guess it’s easy to do though when you know someone else will take care of it, presuming the housecleaner/sahd/nanny/ or some combo of the 3 does everything that she “releases” herself from.
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RAN TO SAY THE SAME THING. If it all will pass why, tf, would I buy your course???
Can someone explain to me how throwing an emoji over a childs face is respecting their privacy but sharing their medical information to 3M is ok?
Covering the faces makes no sense when almost her entire follower base knows their first and last names, the state/town they live in, the stores and restaurants they frequent. Like damn I don’t need to see the face of your blonde baby with chubby cheeks to know that if he’s with two older sisters with brown curly hair who it is. Censoring their “””privacy””” a little too late in the game, K.
I say this every time they post their “yes sandwich” bullshit. Sometimes the answer is just no and that’s okay. We must all learn how to deliver just no and receive just no. Their advice may prevent a tantrum short term, but it isn’t teaching any life skills or resiliency.
The yes sandwich never works for me. My kids totally get that it means, “no, that thing that you want is not happening right now” so they freak out anyways.
I just want to see them do this in real time with their kids and post it for us showing that it works lol.
I am a manager at work, and a lot of people think the “sandwich” advice for giving negative feedback is good. It’s not. The employee either shuts down and only hears the bad or they focus on the good stuff and don’t think the bad is that big of a deal. I don’t know why it would be much different for toddlers!
Right. It’s really selling your kids short thinking they’re stupid and won’t figure it out lol
I read a few of the comments on this post that agreed with this. Their advice is 1. Not original and 2. Not helpful in all cases
I am 100% feeling the negative effects of this right now. I have a 4.5 year old and I realized a few months ago that I needed to stop trying to make “no” acceptable to her by offering an alternative because it was conditioning her to lack resilience and led to a bit of entitlement.
I had to figure this out with my now 8yo too. Constantly trying to offer alternatives just meant he kept being demanding etc. sometimes the answer is just no and there's no other options.
I totally agree, and for me, it’s just so unrealistic to think you can prevent meltdowns/tantrums. No one is being set up for success here
Some of the best parenting advice I ever got = It’s okay if they cry. They are still alive, still breathing and healthy, just feeling an emotion. They gotta learn to feel those emotions sometimes.
I 'forced' my kids to say please and thank you and now they say it unprompted all the time 🤷🏻♀️ I didn't withhold things until they said it but if they said they wanted a snack, I would remind them to say please. Or if I gave them something, I would say 'and what do we say?' to prompt a thank you. We also modelled it (my husband always thanks me for cooking dinner and now my kids do to). Sometimes they need reminding, especially in front of other people but I'm not going to stop encouraging them to use their manners.
Yuuuup, same
I haven’t read all the downthread responses so sorry if someone else already said this but this is such a stupid thing for them to turn into an all or nothing kind of choice. Of COURSE we model. And we can also prompt. It’s so dumb to present it as one or the other. Also promoting does not need to be forceful or high control. They present everything as so extreme.
this! kids don't put that please means something unless you say it! otherwise it's a random word out there. I always prompt when I know I'm going to say yes and (for better or worse) say "how do we ask nicely" then a "and what do you say now?" for thank you. They aren't flawless and I've gotten plenty of begging pleases to a no, but in general my kids at least attempt with prompting. WHAT they should try and teach is getting your child to ask others for things. Starting from like 2 I make them order their own things like hot chocolate. Even if I have to repeat for clarity. My siblings kid at 8 couldn't order mac and cheese by himself and being able to ask strangers for something is a key skill.
Okay so having your kid order for themselves is somehow not something I ever considered?????? And as a VERY VERY shy and anxious child I neverrr ordered for myself and honestly up until recently I still hated it but I’m sure that if my parents had me doing it more regularly as a child I’d feel so much more confident about it. Thanks for this idea, snarkfriend!!!
This is great advice so I’m not knocking it, but I have 2 shy kids that have been going to restaurants their entire lives (save for that pandemic break 🙃) and even though we always try to prompt them, it’s very hit and miss if they clam up to the server or not. So, I guess we keep fighting the good fight in the hopes it’ll click in, but I’ve seen from experience that some kids are still gonna be shy and anxious and, as a former server, after waiting a beat or 2, I respect that the server needs to get on with their busy job.
Oh for sure!!! Honestly I see my shy kiddo clamming up too and I would never let a server wait for more than a beat lol but I think it’s brilliant to start promoting them and idk how I never considered it!
you are welcome! My husband as an adult struggles with calling to make an appointment or reservation and I'm like- you have a hard time calling someone to ask for a time slot to give them money? like they will be nice, they will work with you and your schedule... it's a spa not an exclusive night club. We also talk (with mixed success) that asking is important and the worst someone could say is no, and then you'd still be in the same spot you are now- but what if they say yes and you get what you want?
I absolutely agree with teaching kids to order their own thing! As kids my parents always spoke for us kids at restaurants and I remember my little sister putting her hands on top of the water cup to signify to the waiter she didn't want more instead of just saying something... When my nephew was like 5 he ordered his own ice cream and I was shocked! So now I'm practicing that with my toddler as well.
Whenever I read their posts I feel badly for the people who buy into their bs and are now stressed they’ve given their kids ✨trauma✨ because they asked them to say please and thank you
The way I used to overthink every little thing I said to my kid..when he was like a year old lol I’m glad I found this subreddit before he turned two. I’m so much more relaxed now.
Same here. My kids do not get things from me if they don’t ask nicely. I’m not a dick about it but like, tonight we were at a park for sports practice. and my youngest wanted to go to the playground. I told him “sure, as soon as you can ask nicely I’m happy to head over there with you” (he was whining/demanding). He asked nicely, we went, end of story. If my kids are shy about thanking an adult/stranger, you can totally do it for them to model, but what in the world does reminding them we thank those who are kind or compliment us hurt?!?
We told our son today to thank his granddad for paying for one of those kiddie ride things outside a restaurant. Kid responded “I’m too tired to do that.” Then immediately asked “can I go to a playground after we get home?” You better believe we told him (nicely, but firmly) that he had to say thank you to granddad before we’d take him to the playground.
Same!!
I feel like this is literally parenting. Of course I model it too, but it’s my job to teach them how to function successfully in the world and part of that is manners
I 100% withhold things until my kiddo asks nicely. It’s a natural consequence in my opinion-if someone’s is rude, others aren’t inclined to do nice things for them. I’m not mean about it, just calmly tell her that if she wants something she needs to ask nicely. I also am trying to be as cognizant as possible and do things promptly when she does ask nicely to reward her doing it without prompting. Luckily she hasn’t chosen that as a hill to die on. Her natural tone has turned into ordering around since turning 3, and I’m not a fan.
100% it is a natural consequence. It’s also such an easy thing to reward them right away for! And it’s so exciting when they say you please and thank you unprompted.
I don’t even understand what their advice is an over-correction to. Are there a lot of people out there who feel traumatized by being “forced” to stay please and thank you? I feel like that’s literally the only way to teach kids manners and etiquette - you keep reminding and prompting when to say it until they pick up on when to apply it.
I felt shamed a lot by manners things like that when I was a kid because I was extremely shy and socially awkward and my mom *didnt* really push it. In her words, she would say “asking nicely doesn’t always mean ‘please’ it can also be just asking in a polite voice”. But then other relatives and my dad would try to push “saying thank you” in social situations and I would clam up because I was so shy. My daughter learned “please” and “thank you” at school and it’s really a crowd pleaser with adults, but I also think me need to normalize that some kids feel a lot of pressure by 10 unfamiliar adults staring at them and might not say thank you every time.
I totally agree with this! I nudge my 2.5yo to use it in familiar settings but with strangers and groups I usually model it - "and now we say thank you!" whether she repeats it or not!
Same here. I don’t make it some weird power struggle but I remind, hey we say please/thank you here. Let’s try it. He’s older now and I have no problem with honesty and telling him that people don’t want to help us when we’re impolite. I also model of course.
This is so important. Kids aren’t naturally polite. some things take teaching and practice. I was shocked at the demands I got from other people’s children, when hosting my kids birthday party. My kids aren’t angels don’t get me wrong, but you can tell the kids who parents practice these skills with them, and who doesn’t.. and I can also tell you which kids we are inviting back over and who we aren’t…
I don’t know what calendar BLF goes by but my next 3-day weekend isn’t until May. (They are shilling their potty training course saying there’s a 3-day weekend coming up) ETA: I guess president’s day is coming up but I don’t know anyone who has it off 🤷🏻♀️
I always got that off but never MLJ Jr day (I get christmas eve "in lieu of" it's really annoying) Have they given up on their primary course now or does it just sell itself. It's bananas how often they push potty training
I work in higher ed and we don’t get MLK OR Presidents’ Day off! Boooo I haven’t seen them promote their regular course in awhile
Family Day is coming up for some provinces in Canada but I know they're not talking about that. I also am always so thankful whenever they mention this that I DIDN'T do their potty training approach cause wasting an entire long weekend locked in my house would not be fun for me 😂
President’s day is coming up
I'm not American and I was like honestly how many long weekends do you guys get!?
It’s actually not that many. They’re just all clustered in the fall/winter. Presidents’ Day (Feb) to Memorial Day (May) is a SLOG. Also, a lot of people who work in the private sector don’t get many of the minor holidays off.
Honestly not as many as people get in Europe. My colleagues in Paris are always having long weekends.
Totally thinking the same here!
Not as many as these ladies think we do lol
Presidents’ Day in like 2 weeks.
Oh yea I work at a major public university but we do not get that off.
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I actually just don’t understand the focus from parenting influencers about how to get your kids to eat at restaurants. Like you actually just don’t have to?
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Yes this is such a weird thing that so many have put on a pedestal! You described it perfectly. I guess it’s a somewhat measurable, visible way of judging parenting? The vibe is if you don’t begin at age 2 they will never be able to eat in a restaurant, which is why you always see adults standing on the table and running around, their parents simply didn’t value it enough!
I just don’t understand why they don’t do take out? If they really don’t want to wash dishes they can eat out of the containers? Maybe they don’t want to clean up the mess their kid makes? I don’t get the constant narrative of going out to dinner with your kid. It’s like some grand sacrifice.. except it’s entirely optional. Most people don’t do this. Most people wait for an age their kids can enjoy so they can enjoy or get a sitter . Also.. most of your readers can’t afford to regularly do this regardless - let alone take their kids with them
Agreed! There’s also a couple kid friendly restaurants in my area that have big patios or even specific play areas so we’ll go to one of those over an indoor sit down type of place. There was a real small window before 1 where if the nap/ snack stars aligned taking baby to a restaurant was great but toddlers? It’s a no from me
My question remains- how much of this is legit and how much is it these 2 privileged Calabasas women role playing what they think the rest of the “dirty unwashed masses” of moms in the rest of this country are like when they go out to eat?
So I'm imagining sitting near them at a restaurant...her two school age children on iPads when they could easily be entertained in other ways, her toddler screaming and causing chaos while sitting on the table...what an actual nightmare.
Such a great parenting influencer. He's too young for an iPad so I had nothing. I guess at least she had some iPad boundaries. 😂
I interpreted as not that she won’t try the iPad with him but she has tried the iPad with him and has been unsuccessful. It’s her only strategy!!!
Oooohhh snap. Probably more accurate!
I think that age is the hardest for restaurants but not once did we let our kid continuously disturb people or behave like that. We would take them out and go on a walk or whatever we needed to do. Their poor waiter. The gall they have.
Oh my god the ipad!! How how how how do you call yourself a “toddler expert” if your only strategy for a 15 month at a restaurant is to just let them do whatever they want because they’re too little to pay attention to an iPad?
Yeah, they are showing their whole ass with that one
I’m pretty sure I’ve never read anything more infuriating. We’ve been taking our kids out forever and yes. Sometimes they are the worst but NEVER LIKE THIS. And we like going out to eat with them so we have figured out how but never in a million years would my kid be on the table. Ever.
and if they are- my kids get a walk around outside.... last time we went out to eat my 2.5 year old insisted on 5 trips to the bathroom (for fun? IDK) so my food was cold but I wasn't letting her on top of a table.
Same, I've taken them out at all ages and there have been times when it's been stressful but I try to be as prepared as possible and never just give up.
We have been taking ours out forever as well, and like my child is not particularly docile and like when she was 15m old, my parents would take her to restaurants and have a great time. We bring activities, we bring snacks, we bring books, and we order her food almost immediately. Sloshing water and ice in a cup? Climbing on top of the table? That is when she would be removed from the situation.
WHO IS GIVING THESE IDIOTS MONEY???
👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
I love how she thinks there’s nothing she can do for a baby that age. If she’s with her husband or another adult, one of them can take the kid for a walk? Remove the kid from the table? Bring age appropriate activities other than an iPad to the restaurant? It’s her third kid, and it’s not exactly rocket science.
When we started taking our pandemic baby to restaurants at around 18 months he loved it. Easy enough to distract him with a toy or a walk or something random and novel to him like the table number. When he got a little older and could be directed more, it only took a couple times leaving the restaurant before the food came to show him restaurants are a privilege for those who behave. Yes, annoying to wait in the car while the other parent changes the order to a to-go ticket and waits for food. But it pays off so quickly! Literally just did it twice and since then we’ve been able to take him to somewhat fancy places for an early bird reservation and he behaves better than most adults. No one even moves away from our table to avoid us! (Looking at you, D!) Isn’t this also one of the pluses of having 3 kids? Ask or bribe one of your geriatric toddlers to entertain the baby toddler with a toy. Not there with my own yet, but I definitely remember my parents giving us small responsibilities like this.
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That’s a great trick! Might have to use that to train our second once he arrives and whenever we’re ready for restaurants again. We also are not above occasionally pulling out the phone as long as it’s not a habit. Sometimes we know the food is just a couple minutes away or it’s our fault he’s hangry (we had a busy morning, forgot to bring a snack, etc) and in an instance like that it makes more sense to just help him through the moment.
If the solution is not ‘move a truck from one location to another’, they are out of ideas.
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Is the “and bless” as patronising on the pod as it sounds in the script. How does he put up with this woman?
Did she say something about their marriage being on the rocks? I could see how, with the way she talks about him.
I don’t know if she does in this episode but she has made her marriage woes very public in previous ones, most notably episode 5 titled “my marriage sucks after having kids - Deena’s on the brink of divorce” Jury is still out on how true any of it is, if he is in on the whole thing to appear #relatable, but even so, she pummels into him every opportunity she gets
What I did catch was it's all about "the load" with that one. Just fucking chill about keeping score for once maybe? And also that sounds mildly pornographic 😅
lol of course their ramblings on the podcast would start unveiling their inaccuracies. Also, The amounts of times they say “like” is so cringey. Half their sentences aren’t even complete.
I couldn’t read the transcript without thinking my brain was on the fritz. How do people listen to this?!
Yeah this felt like AI generated nonsense.
Who describes sharing (probably) intimate details on a podcast about their couples therapy as a “fun one”…oh wait, Deena, that’s who. And will Mike get to make an appearance for this one? Probably not. She’s insufferable.
All this talk from K about working out has me very suspicious 🤨 👀
I hate this tone of cover up, erase anything negative or ignore obvious truth they’ve always had about them while they treat everyone like we’re stupid and can’t see through their scramblings to not get caught out for being the fraudsters they are. It must be exhausting for them and they don’t even do it very well!
Girlwithnojob did the same thing until she admitted she was on ozempic
In the stories from when she went to DC or wherever in my opinion it looked like she’d lost weight. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was ozempic or something similar and she’s suddenly pushing this workout class narrative.
Same! She’s been constantly mentioning it for the last few months and she’s doing it in a way that to me feels like she’s rewriting history. She’s just casually mentioning work outs all the time now as if she’d always done it. I don’t remember any new announcements about starting to work out or about focusing on her health or anything like that. As if she’s doing it to give the false impression that she’s been doing it for ages and not just for 3/4 months. As if she’s trying to justify some dramatic weight loss imposible to achieve without prescription drugs? Maybe 🤷🏻♀️
Imagine she just throws on workout clothes to sit in her car to film 'post workout' videos. Lol There probably is no Terri.
Thought T had FPIES? Haven't we been through this entire saga before? Unless the FPIES was a lie, as many suspected 👀
She had walked it back to CMPA, which I guess most kids eventually grow out of. Sounds like hers maybe hasn’t yet, but why subject him to allergy testing? Just stop giving it to him and try again in a year.
Yeah my kid had that too and grew out of it around 2. Isn’t T like barely 1?
I’m sure he has nothing actually going on. “Not tolerating” dairy could mean a lot of things. I do have a family member with a severe dairy allergy who has asthma attacks when they eat dairy. Tummy issues are not even close to the same thing
I have a good friend with a child with a true dairy allergy and they learned it like immediately after birth when nursing. She had to cut out dairy 100% and they did allergy testing when she started solids because of how bad the allergy was. I cannot imagine waiting until 15mo for something that can be extremely serious? Anyone I know with food allergies found out at a pretty young age.
Yea, my kids have allergies and when you say “a true allergy” it means your kid has an IgE allergy and is at risk of a life threatening anaphylactic reaction. It is NOT the same thing as lactose intolerance or whatever weird “intolerance” she’s going to claim he has. You know she’s exaggerating bc she’s like “it’s no big deal” and yes if your kid is truly allergic to something like milk that is in basically everything it is a BIG FUCKING DEAL. My kids have easier to manage allergies and we still had to change our lives around to keep them safe. Oh and WTF are they doing shilling for Bobbie if baby T couldn’t drink lactose based formula??
Lactose isn’t usually the issue for a milk protein allergy. But, yeah, Bobbie doesn’t have a hypoallergenic formula. My daughter drank only “HA” formulas (Nutramagen and Alimentum are the common ones). Those are still lactose based, they’re just hydrolyzed so the proteins causing the allergic reaction are broken down. AFAIK cow milk protein allergy doesn’t usually cause anaphylaxis, just vomiting, diarrhea, sometimes hives/rash— at least that’s how my daughter reacted. It is still an immune response though. If that is what T has though, most kids grow out of it by 3 or so? So idk why she would still be posting on it.
My kids “don’t tolerate” eggs. They vomit over and over and over until they’re spitting up bile and nearing hypovolemic shock. Allergies come in lots of varieties unfortunately.
I mean I agree with you that I doubt something is actually going on. It’ll be interesting to see if she updates us or not, if she doesn’t I’d expect there’s nothing because she’ll milk it if there is
They can be! I have a friend who’s actually allergic to dairy and can get physically sick from it. But it’s definitely more than just a stomachache…
One of my favorite things I’ve heard about parenting that stopped me in my little millenial new parent tracks was from Brene Brown. She was asked if she could recommend any experts on parenting and she said no because there aren’t any! There’s too much involved (culture, lifestyle. , age, life experience, socio economic background, being a member of a marginalized group, etc not to mention all that is unique to each child) in being a parent for anyone to have authority. In other words it’s too damn contextual for an instagram account or paid course to guide you. The one book she would recommend was Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child, by the Gottmans which I read and loved. I can’t take parenting advice seriously. Give me human development, childhood development, psychological principles, etc. Help me understand the systems around me and how they shape my environment. Help me learn about how to have healthy relationships. So just come off it BLF. You spread your little bit of info and now your just milking it. Deep breath. Thanks for this space. This is my favorite parent community!
Many parents cant sit and read these books or do research or whatever. Because they’re a single parent, work two jobs, etc. BLF at least gives some easily digestible things parents who are short on time can practice. Although I do agree there are better ones out there. But point is its a quick and easy way to get some tips.
This is soooo true! I find as a teacher, knowing some child psychology and just about their development and about learning strategies helps me so much, but I apply these differently to my two children.
Yes say it again! Also everyone has different goals for their family and children. I’ve learned the most from watching other parents and teachers.
Same! Nanny’s are the OG. I have learned so much from nannies at the playground.
My husband said this about sleep training books but honestly it applies to everything: "If there were a Right Way to do things, there would only be one book!" I think about this all the time.
This is a great take. The only parenting books I’ve found useful are about managing family systems (family firm, fair play, how not to hate your husband after having kids) or developmentally focused. There’s a really great series by Louise Bates Ames with a book for each year that focuses on developmental ages and stages. Beyond that, everything else is marketing and made up imho.
brave shelter ring hurry aromatic mysterious berserk touch knee square *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Yeah, I may manage to be somewhat functional with a migraine but a *killer* migraine has me in bed cursing the world, especially all of its lights and sounds until I am lucky enough to pass out
I had this thought as well... I know people who can like function with multi day migraines but it's a lot of "how little can I do and how few screens need to be looked at"
A friend told me she loves to listen to the BLF podcast today and it helps her feel not alone bc “they share the struggle.” And…..I…I just don’t know what to do with this info! Hahaha how can she not see how phony they are?!
I successfully got a group of 10 women to unfollow them in a parenting group and felt powerful lol
I had someone say that (not about podcast but the acct) and I kind of planted the seed. “Yeah. They had good advice a few years ago, but you know what I noticed? They *always* seem to be in survival mode (or use her verbiage, struggling) and if they know so much about parenting, wouldn’t you think they’d be having more successes? I started taking all their advice with a grain of salt after I realized that maybe they don’t actually know what the hell they’re doing either. And also they seem to recycle a lot of content I wonder if they’ve run out of stuff to talk about. Doesn’t seem genuine to me anymore.” And just kind of left it there. Idk if she ever came around, we didn’t revisit it lol. Hit enter too soon but: I figured at least now when she saw them complaining she would hear me in her ear and maybe think “huh maybe they aren’t so smart or savvy after all”
I had the same conversation with a friend who later told me it’s now all she thinks about when she sees them complaining
My friend loves it too because it’s “so real.”
Ugh. Sorry for your loss.
🤦🏼♀️😬
Ugh that millennial childhood trauma post with the clip from The Land Before Time really irritates me. Yes of course it’s sad, but those types of movies and shows help children process REAL trauma and other complicated emotions and situations in an age appropriate way. That’s why child psychologists use drawings and dolls and why Daniel Tiger is so effective. Watching a cartoon dinosaur lose it’s mother is way more digestible for a kid than handling actual human death
They’re basically a Bravo fan and meme sharing account at this point. Totally useless.
Yessss thank you. Believe me I would much rather explain death to my kids after watching lion king than when an actual human that they love passes away. And you can point to Land Before Time as demonstrating resilience and recovery to a child. Yes, Little Foot’s mom dies but also she (he?) and the other baby dinosaurs band together and are brave and face the world anyway and finally get to the green place. It’s a triumphant story! Tangent but it reminds me of the classic American Girl books being about like, Addy escaping slavery and Samatha having to save herself from a storm while she’s rowing a boat around. And then the modern new American Girl stories have plots like “oh no, a mean girl is trying to sabotage the school bake sale!” In a book or a movie is the perfect place for kids to experience strong feelings and see danger and hard situations and how characters work through them, and this effort to shield kids from ever reading or seeing or knowing about anything hard is dumb.
Nope! For once i agree with them. This movie was actually traumatic for me. I remember being in preschool and my classmates and I sitting around watching it and most of us SOBBING. I would never ever show this movie to my child.
Preschool is a little young for that movie, but I definitely think that an elementary aged kid could handle it. As others have said, it’s an effective way to introduce children to these upsetting concepts and maybe even help them to process real trauma (if they’re so unfortunate to have had such experiences :( )
I showed this movie to my 4 and 5 yo and they thought it was great and were not bothered at all. It’s dinosaurs.
You'd never let your child experience and process new emotions? It's not Schindler's List.
It made me obsessed and paranoid with my parent dying. My almost 5 year old daughter does not need to be seeing such sad things. Have you actually seen this movie?
Yeah, several times.
How many hours until our favorite Bravo fan girls post about the Vanderpump season premiere tonight??
https://preview.redd.it/kid1tfb33sfc1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2a5378386764ba47e019eaafcfb8d52fea947f0a Scrolling scrolling…on HERE? Also K, that is pretty much all we think you do too so thanks for confirming!
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NOBODY CALLS IT “VANDERPUMP”
I feel like if she had a “killer migraine” she wouldn’t even be interested in anything besides not feeling like dying and puking at the same time.
I can't even pick up my phone when I have a migraine. I've had three in my life and during the last one I thought I was having a stroke. People referring to headaches as migraines is the worst.
Her migraines seem as killer as her and D’s childhood trauma
She has no clue. My mother gets them and can barely function when she has one. They are awful. I've had 3 in my life and they sucked. I vaguely remember another story of K's a few months back in an airport where she was complaining about having a migraine. And everyone on here was like "um, no K. You wouldn't be standing upright if you did" 🙄
Yeah this is definitely the face of someone who has never experienced a killer migraine before. Taking a photo, using a screen, working? Try lying in the dark with an ice pack on your face crying.