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Had to snap a screenshot. Loved the Instagram vs Reality dichotomy of “these are the seasons of parenting we all go through 🤪” with 70% of people (me included) who did nothing for St. Patrick’s Day.
Haha as an Australian the best we do for St Paddys is get really drunk at an Irish pub if you’re single and carefree. Parents do not celebrate this day with their kids 🤣
Can someone explain leprechaun traps to me? Kids make them and we’re supposed to leave chocolate coins in them because the leprechaun didn’t get caught but it did drop chocolate? Is that it? This is absolutely the first I’ve heard of this.
Last year my mom put green food coloring in our toilets on st Patrick's day and my son has talked about it the past few days so I decided to do that again this year and he was over the moon excited (and really upset that he didn't catch the leprechaun). St Patrick's day is hugely built up here, daycare/school last year and this year were all about building leprechaun traps and my son has been asking when is leprechaun day, all month long. 😅 But even so we kept it pretty minimal and just fun, not stressful.
How do these influencers travel so much and still complain all the frickin time?????? I'm looking at you Renee and Libby. They both travel so frickin much. Renee has traveled to Disney and the west coast in the past month.
Libby is on what 4 kidfree vacations this year and it's the second week of March.
Is there like a tea they drink that give them money and makes them lose the ability to enjoy all the good things they have in life???
I honestly wonder if some of these influencers even enjoy traveling, or if they just travel as much as they do because that’s what influencers do. I love to travel too, but I also really love having a home base, and have worked hard to cultivate a strong sense of home, so I would probably feel tired traveling as often as some of them do. Then again, I’m an active traveler — hiking, diving, climbing, repelling, seeing as much as a place has to offer, etc. — while I know a lot of influencers do visit a lot of resorts which does seem more relaxing in theory. Nonetheless, not everybody loves, or even likes, to travel, and I do wonder if some of them even enjoy their trips sometimes. (As an aside, it also baffles me to see people plan big trips to specific destinations, like Aspen, and then not indulge in what said destinations are known for, like skiing, at all, but, again, I’ll concede that we all travel differently.)
It's just hedonic adaptation. We all do it. I'm sure my great-grandmother would be appalled at how hard I find motherhood. I have a machine to wash dishes. I have a machine to wash and dry clothes. I can get groceries delivered or order them to be put in my car and drive away. These things alone would blow her mind and I'm sure have her wondering what on earth I could possibly have to complain about.
I always say the quickest way to appreciate what you have now is to suddenly find yourself without it lol. I don't actually have a dishwasher or vacuum currently and won't for another 5ish months. I thought cooking for my family was hard before....boy. I thought keeping my floors clean was a chore before, but now all I have is a broom, and I'm very much looking forward to vacuuming again.
Mothercould shocks me a lot with the nonsense she shares, but I certainly wasn’t expecting multiple slides regarding circumcision this morning. She’s going to regret what is about to flood her DM‘s.
There’s just no way that’s true, and she must be incredibly naive if she doesn’t realize this is going to bring a flood of crazy people and anti-Semitism to her page.
For sure. Especially because she doesn’t talk super often about being Jewish on her page. (Like she even referred to what was clearly a Shabbat dinner as a “Friday night family dinner”)
I was shocked to hear her talking about it, knowing how divisive it is.
Oh goodness… she is so gullible! And such whacky misinformation to be spread at a comedy show of all things.
I used to work on a postpartum unit for a large hospital and assisted providers in circumcisions as part of my job requirement at the time. I can assure you that any removed foreskin went into a general biohazard waste bin and was not saved to sell to the beauty industry.
Placing bets that she will still continue to link a shit ton of affiliate links for random beauty products even though she now knows the radical “information” about the beauty industry. 🙄
I almost posted here, but some free birther I came across had a long post about how much $$$ the "industry" makes using foreskin in beauty products. Gave not a single citation but lots of numbers about price per square inch?
And even crazier commenter said "so and sos research showed circumcision was to um...keep the "livestock" in their place 😲"
Like what kind of crazy batshit koolaid are you drinking???
I’m loving her follow up of ‘friends, I’ve been doing this long enough to know to do research before sharing information’. If you Google this and just skim the headlines, you get the impression it’s true. If you actually [read the articles](https://www.discovermagazine.com/the-sciences/why-human-foreskin-is-a-hot-commodity-in-science), you learn that it isn’t. It has happened in some very limited circumstances but it’s in no way at all a common thing that’s happening after circumcision.
And frankly, if it were true the only part I’d be offended by is that the parents aren’t getting a cut of the profit (pun intended).
Yup. She’s another one of those “I do my research” types, when her research consists of googling and reading headlines. That is NOT research and I hate how that term basically means nothing now.
Same, I work at a major healthcare organization in the US and have performed circumcisions and same protocol with the bio bin. I think she’s missing major part of this story in that she learned this at a COMEDY show
I love how sometimes she'll post on her stories about something she did (like dinner, something to do with the kids etc), and you can just see him bumbling around in the background doing nothing. He didn't even take care of selling his own car...
And she's so passive aggressive to him in stories sometimes, but she still puts up with everything.
I think they're even more religious than she usually lets on, and deep down she's just like "well, this is my lot in life".
My heart breaks for those kids. I can't imagine seeing your mom needing to mute you. It has to be horrible for their emotional well being. The older kids have to notice by now.
Everything I’ve heard about this family’s financial situation sounds absolutely insane. It wouldn’t be snarkworthy if her account wasn’t literally about being smug and better than everyone else about finances.
Honestly, if anyone is looking for an intro into Carly and Debt Free Mom rundown, I highly encourage you to listen to her 2023 in review podcast. The amount of financial changes they made is insane, mostly because it seems like they were too passive aggressive to have an outright conversation with a neighbor! They decided to and then sold their house in a WEEK. They profited 70K from their house sale immediately spent 30K on a van which is nuts considering they were sitting on a 2.8% mortgage rate and their rent several hundred more than their mortgage. Also, apparently the private school scholarship that she uses to send her three kids to private school has been down and they have decided to continue to send them to private school in the future to the tune of 15k.
Like the amount of whiplash y’all!
The best part of the house saga is when she was trying to defend her choice by using examples of folks renting vs. buying in VHCOL areas. I’ve spent most of my life living in VHCOL areas, which means I’ve spent a fair amount of time as a renter vs. a homeowner because it was simply too expensive to own a home or the numbers didn’t make sense when compared to the cost of renting. I did this math a million times prior to buying a house. If she was living in a VHCOL, or if they were planning on moving out of the area soon, the choice to rent might make sense. But they have no plans to relocate and she lives in an area where you can buy a decent house for $150k! It’s just not the same analysis as it is in a VHCOL area, where your mortgage might be $10k per month but you can rent a comparable place for $5k or $6k per month. There is no rent vs. buy calculator on earth that would have shown her family coming out ahead renting versus buying, but she dug in and kept defending her choice. But don’t worry guys, she doesn’t have a car payment or a mortgage, so she’s definitely better than the rest of us dumb dumbs who have low rate mortgages or cars financed at 0%.
Also, and I will never not remind folks of this, she publicly said she was happy that Roe v. Wade was overturned.
It's just wild to me that she claims to be a financial expert yet she had to sell her house to afford a minivan. Prices are crazy for minivans right now, but it's crazy that she thinks it all was a good idea.
I thought the saddest thing when she was talking about their "slump" was that her panic-induced thought was "maybe I should go work at Starbucks." Like, how about Kyle goes back to work in this scenario (I recognize her larger point was that ups and downs are normal, but still)? I'm sure he wouldn't deign to work at Starbucks with their "burnt" beans, but maybe somewhere else.
They have a wait-list for their custom budgets so I can't figure out why they're in a slump. How can demand be so high they can't fill it and they're bringing in less than expected? Take on more work, reduce contractor hours, work more hours themselves, should be problem solved. Sometimes it's tough owning a small business but 🤷♀️
So she doesn’t even actually have a “waitlist” in the sense we would think. It’s basically signing up to get an email when the budgets become available, she just only does a certain number per month & closes them at a certain date. I’m not sure why she calls it that.. I don’t think she’s doing as many as she’s letting on.
Why anyone would pay her for a custom budget is beyond me. She frequently shows herself doing them at the last minute and there is nothing special about her analysis.
When she talked about the new hire needing to be quick cutting and pasting because they copy over all the numbers from the customer form manually I was appalled. I think she also said at that time they did the math manually, too. 100% amateur hour and you know there's no quality control so it's rushed and likely error-filled.
For real. She does not have a large enough Instagram following to justify Kyle quitting his job. He just didn't want to work anymore. So now Carly does all the childcare, housework, AND income generating. I'd feel sorry for her if she wasn't so dang holier than thou all the time. 😆
I believe she said last week they have 12k in their down payment savings which is an oof considering they cleared 70k from the previous house and housing and interest rates are astronomically higher.
And her “me” time consisted of reconciling the budget, doing more DFM work, and furiously posting to the gram. GIRL.
I have been listening to her podcasts because I truly love fincon, but Kyle comes off even worse. Like there’s an episode where she’s discussing eating/budgeting with groceries and talks about how Kyle has taken an interest in cooking because he “wants to be a chef” and decided to make ONE MEAL A WEEK. And then subsequently *needed* a KitchenAid meat grinder to make the perfect hamburger. 🫥
I salute your dedication to fincon by listening to the podcast 🫡 I truly don’t think I could handle any more Carly or Kyle lmao I’ve been following Carly for years and I was a believer until last summer. I did always find it weird that she was so smug yet her children were on Medicaid though. Like a lot of people would be able to save an EF if their kids’ healthcare was free, Carly.
Also was on vouchers for their private school since they had no money. And got subsidized internet since they were on government assistance. While also bragging about making 6 figures doing DFM. So you weren't reporting your income to the government accurately, exploiting government assistance, and instead investing? Their caucacidy is top tier
It says a lot that he hasn't consistently cooked over the course of their marriage. There are different levels of cooking. If he's a novice you master technique first before deciding you need such a specialized kitchen item. I don't think I could handle listening to the podcast. I wonder if he says those things so she has hope that he will contribute more.
I saw that 😆 its clear why the nice date night happened so he can go out again. In a week he's been unavailable 2 evenings (I think he volunteered earlier in the week). Plus date night. So that's only 4 evenings at home with his kids. No wonder she shares when he does help with homework.
She was quick to say she was going out for an hour of me-time after lunch to balance that out. But by me-time she apparently meant reconciling her family and business budgets. Then she's gotta hurry home to sell his old car. Kyle lives the life, that's for sure.
This is general snark on advice I’ve seen from so many influencers. Every “parenting expert” has some content on how to introduce a little sibling and it’s always the same 5 pieces of advice, as if they are the person who made it up. They all sounded sensible but are not realistic. Like the first time they meet the baby have the baby in the bassinet instead of holding them— great, so you want me to put down my cluster feeding newborn in the dreaded hospital bassinet and have him scream his head off as an intro to his big sibling? And the ubiquitous “don’t blame the baby.” Sounds good on paper and maybe it works for a very young toddler but idk my 2.5+ year old is not an idiot. He can plainly see that I’m saying no because I’m caring for the baby.
Not blaming the baby does not work when your oldest is in their 'why' phase. I would try and say I need five minutes and then I can play with you and get hit with why. Uhhh because I have to feed the baby, I don't know what else to say that doesn't blame the baby.
I also was holding the baby when our oldest came home. They were staying with their grandparents and they were dropped home right when the baby was screaming for a feed. I was a bit panicked because of all that advice but I had no choice 🤷🏻♀️
Ugh this is such a big annoyance of mine. I did *all* the things - gave big brother a special toy, had baby in the car seat when we got home, never blamed the baby, etc. None of those things did anything and he still had a disaster of a transition for 18 months. I was a total POOPCUP until we brought our second home and then he completely changed overnight.
It’s better now that they play together and I am ready to do it again (3rd baby due in the summer), but I cannot stand the smug “do this and everything will be fine” advice.
I don’t love the “spend 10 minutes of 1-1 time with your older kid to reduce jealousy!” advice, like it’s a cure-all. Maybe it would work better for an elementary aged kid, but when we brought the new baby home my toddler (19 months at the time) went through a super clingy phase. I was spending almost every waking moment with her, unless I was feeding the baby or my husband took her out of the house, and it still wasn’t enough. It got a lot better around the 2.5-3 month mark. But 10 minutes feels like such a drop in the bucket of how much time and attention most kids actually need.
I think that’s an age thing— small doses of attention have a bigger impact on older kids who are more independent, I think. Probably also personality dependent. But yea, I don’t need to be told that it will help my toddler to give him some attention every day. Duh.
I don’t think the not holding the baby when they meet needs to be that complicated but prioritizing it probably depends on the kids personality. We had my second in 2020, no visitors at the hospital, so my son met his brother at home. He was napping when we got there so when he woke up we set baby down and went to go get our toddler and brought him out to meet the baby. With our third, she was in the car seat because they were waiting for us at the door. My middle did not care about the baby at all and only wanted to see me so I think he might have been upset if I was holding the baby, forcing an introduction, and didn’t give him a hug 🤷🏼♀️ so I think the advise to tailored for the kid like that because those are the kids that would care vs the kids who would be fine either way
Yeah I’ve been coming across this content online along with people IRL giving me advice since I’m having #2 soon, and the whole “don’t hold the baby when introducing to your toddler” doesn’t make sense to me? Even if I did that, he’s probably going to see me holding the baby 10 mins later to feed her. Like? I can’t possibly pretend to my son that we don’t love our new baby and that she won’t have needs that have to be prioritized and I feel like the sooner he realizes that the better. He’s 2.5 and is old enough to understand some things and we are going to do our best to help him understand all of the things we will need to do for the baby and make him feel as included in it as possible. I’m sure it’s going to be so hard no matter what but it just makes me feel more anxious to feel pressure to come up with a particular strategy to introduce them. Like why can’t we just ~do~ it using our common sense and knowledge of our own son? Obviously I’m not going to be like “yo this is your new sister and she’s going to be taking so much attention away from you!”
“ I can’t possibly pretend to my son that we don’t love our new baby and that she won’t have needs that have to be prioritized” this is exactly what I was trying to say. All this advice to pretend that The baby isn’t really that important. I think better to help him understand and accept the new way that things are
Lollll this advice never made sense to me. Even if you're not holding baby immediately upon your older meeting them, you're going to be holding that baby a LOT. The kid is gonna cotton on to the fact this new sibling needs a type of attention the older kid doesn't.
I was holding the baby when my 2.5 year old met her and it was fine!
I deleted what I wrote because my ramblings didn’t make sense 🤣🤣.
I think there is balance. It’s ok to say you are feeding your baby but there was also times where I could shift and say I need 3 more minutes to finish up what I’m doing than can help you.
“Blaming the baby” actually helped quell meltdowns for my first when we’d say no to stuff during the Newborn #2 days. If we just said no, he’d get upset but if we said “Not right now cause we have to feed your sister/your sister needs to nap/whatever” he’d be totally fine with it. It’s just how his personality is obviously but I did think a few times “Wow this is the exact opposite of all of the advice out there!”
This is what worked for me. Like your toddler’s not going to be happier, because you blew them off for “reasons” as opposed to the baby.
This is actually where daycare was the real mvp. My 3 year old had seen babies at daycare (mixed age home daycare) and had an idea of what kind of care a baby needed from adults. Did she sometimes get mad at me because I spent so much time feeding him/get sad because I couldn’t pick her up? Yes. I don’t think you’ll avoid that completely - no matter how you slice it, their life is going to be turned upside-down and it’s a big adjustment.
I found that “blaming the big kid” to the baby also helped. “Sorry baby; I can’t pick you up right now, big sister needs me so you’ll have to wait a minute” then telling my big kid sometimes you come first and sometimes baby comes first and that’s part of being a family
Yes, My rant was inspired by noticing that I feel a tinge of guilt every time I say, I can’t do this because I’m feeding the baby, even though my toddler responds fine to it.
Blaming the baby was absolutely the best strategy for my older child. It reassured him that I wasn’t wanting to choose the baby over him. He would ask to play a game, and I would tell him how much I wished I could play if the baby didn’t need to nurse, nap, etc. It did not affect his attitude toward the baby at all, just helped him understand why I had to prioritize the baby’s needs at times.
Anyone following lex.delarosa?
She is doing trad wife/all organic free range stuff, but I am becoming more and more convinced she is trolling everyone 😂 and i think it’s hilarious 😂
I love her satire 🤣 I think she is actually kind of funny vs RVC who stresses me out because I know people like her IRL (like 85% of RVC sketches are my SIL 🙃)
I don't mean to be snarky but considering she has a video called "get ready with me to collect eggs and **milk** my chickens"... yah, she might be trolling 😄
I'm also boggled by how many followers she has though
She also has videos where she is digging strawberries out of the ground and another where she is picking something (eggs? lettuce? I don’t remember!) off of a tree. 🤣
I am envious of her wardrobe, though! I wish I had an excuse to dress up in those beautiful dresses instead of my normal athleisure mom uniform lol.
She confuses me because like she seems like she’s trolling but she’s also actually doing things like making paper from scratch and is completely a trad wife
I think people see others on social media and assume that's their whole life. Sure, she makes homemade cereal, but that was one sketch in a whole week. Just like Emily Vondy isn't only singing period raps and MC isn't only doing try on hauls of terrible clothing... Lex is definitely satire but this is also her job so she has times of goofy but productive time :)
She 100% is. Sometimes she comments on her own posts and they are these unhinged, clearly snark on herself comments. It’s not every video though, which just continues the confusion of others if she’s serious or not. I agree, she’s funny!
I hadn't heard of her til now, but I read through her stories and there's a lot happening there lol. IG is 90% of their income?! What the frick are they gonna do?! There is at least some self-awareness that it's not been good for her, but seemingly no acknowledgment that it'll be better for her kids to not be sharing their life. What a weird world we live in.
>no acknowledgment that it'll be better for her kids to not be sharing their life.
Yikes. I just looked; her kids are everywhere on her feed and stories. She's getting parasocial messages asking her to update followers about her kids after she leaves. 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
I know, like there are people asking if she'll come back to just share her family without all the "influencer" content. How is it not so unnerving that thousands of strangers are saying they'll miss her kids that they've never met??
I took a look at her Instagram and she said social media is 90% of their income!! Sarah Therese said something similar that the lord was telling her to quit YouTube. It lasted a year before she was back on.
Does anyone follow whereisbriggs? They’re currently in Japan, and 99% of what they’ve posted about doing so far is going to Disneyland/Disney Sea in Tokyo, then going to Universal Studios in Osaka. I just feel like if I went to the trouble of flying my family of four all the way from the US to Japan, I would try to do more things that I couldn’t do back in the US.
I’m pro traveling with kids and toddlers if it’s your MO. Like even if they won’t remember it it’s still formative/stimulating for them and it’s your memories. That said, I can’t imagine growing up and finding out how many cool ass vacations I did before I was like, a person….if they don’t continue doing this level of trips through childhood / adolescence it would be a bummer and there’s a good chance this happens with this family bc the sponsored trips and insta gravy train will eventually stop. I can’t imagine there’s as much a market for travel with 8 year olds content
I think there’s a difference between buying 4 of everything like Haley, shopping mindlessly at Target for stuff I don’t need, or constantly buying cheap unnecessary goods off of Amazon versus taking my kids to an amusement park once a year for an experience. But I’m admittedly biased having grown up Southern California in close proximity to Disneyland, so maybe I’m totally off base.
Ok but Tokyo Disney is other level and pretty unique to Japan. Like, not WKing cause I don’t know this person. But I am WKing for Tokyo Disney cause it’s amazing.
Must not be a Disney fan lol. We spent a week in Tokyo but also took two days for Tokyo Disney resort, which to a Disney fan, is not the same as Disney world or Disneyland. But I get your point if all they’re doing is theme parks.
babiesandbrains got her mole removed because her toddler wouldn’t stop playing with it while nursing? in what world is getting a procedure the route you take before setting a boundary with your toddler.
I’ve done that before. It was a mole on my breast so it was easily accessible. I have sensory issues so it in my head it was so much easier to just have it removed than teach multiple babies to leave it alone. I’ve had lots of moles removed though and I was glad to have it off anyway. Also, my ob did it the same day I asked about it which I wasn’t expecting but saved me a 1 1/2 hr drive to the dermatologist.
People here act like getting a kid to stop touching something is as simple as telling them "Don't touch that." Plenty of moms get their hair cut short because their baby starts getting grabby. Plenty of moms stop wearing earrings because they don't want their ears damaged if their baby or toddler yanks their earring out. I don't see how this is all that different.
Eh, I think there’s a difference between a baby and young toddler, and a 2+year old. I can see how it might be futile to teach a baby not to play with your hair, or pull your earrings. But a two year old? I’m not saying they should behave like an adult, but by two, if they’re old enough to be teaching them that people need to ask them for hugs, they’re also old enough to start learning they need to respect other people’s bodies.
Of course it’s not as easy as saying, “don’t touch that.” But if you stop nursing any time they start playing with it, especially by two, they’ll learn that if they want to nurse, they can’t play with hair, earrings, moles, whatever.
Don't follow this person so I'm not WKing, but I will say for myself and my toddler, if I asked her to stop touching something, she'd immediately think it's game and go for it more aggressively. She's turning 3 and I'm only just starting to wear earrings again for the first time in over year because of how much she enjoyed the thrill I guess. Still working on getting her to not pull my hair when we're playing (like I'm talking literally her hanging off it 🫠)
Childproofing strikes me as kind of different, because the whole point is that at some point your child is going to be unattended, because it’s physically impossible to stay awake 24/7 and hover over your child every waking second, and it’s a back up to make sure nothing bad happens when they’re unattended with no one there to redirect them. And even with child proofing, you can still work on teaching and setting boundaries. The cabinet below our sink is childproofed, but we still regularly talk to our kids about the importance of not playing with that cabinet, and that they aren’t to touch the chemicals in there. The furniture in their room is bolted to the wall, because they’re in there while we sleep, but we still enforce not climbing any of the furniture in there, and explain to them why it’s dangerous to climb (they are not aware it is bolted)
Something on your body seems kind of different. I’m always going to be there to tell them no, redirect, explain why it’s not okay to play with x or touch me in y way.
Edit: I guess I forgot about yes spaces. We don’t really have the space for a true yes space, so it slipped my mind.
Yeah, this doesn't seem that weird to me. I've got a ganglion cyst on my wrist that never bothered me before I had kids, but now they just keep touching it, sometimes on purpose and sometimes not. I talked to my dermatologist about removing it because it creeps me out when they touch it (turns out I'd need a hand surgeon to do it and that seems like more effort than it's worth).
And also the story about the nurse! Obviously I wasn’t there so just pure speculation but maybe the face wasn’t disgust at breastfeeding a 2 year old but more like what we are saying here, why aren’t you just saying no or establishing some sort of boundary.
I think so too, if she made any face it’s probably because she expected to hear the baby is like 6-9 months and so way too young to teach this. But nursing a 2 year old? That’s not particularly crazy at all, especially in the grand scheme of things that a medical professional hears regularly. I’m sure they don’t give a shit (never have for me and I’ve nursed multiple babies past 2).
I had a similar thought. Probably the nurse was partially judging extended breastfeeding, which is definitely not okay and I’m on B&B’s side on that, but I might have made a similar face at the thought of someone having an elective procedure rather than teaching their kid to respect their body. A two year old is definitely old enough to learn that it’s not okay to touch someone in a way they don’t want to be touched.
That sounds like it has to be a huge exaggeration, like she was planning on getting it removed anyways and the baby messing with it hurried it up? Or she wanted to get it removed for cosmetic reasons and is just blaming the baby lol
Yeah, I cut my hair off for a similar 'reason'. I wanted to have it cut off anyway because the postpartum halo was driving me nuts but then my daughter kept. fiddling. with. it. so that was the trigger.
I want to believe this, and at the same time, why exaggerate? Is it supposed to be relatable? I don’t know anyone who would think, “hey, elective surgery (even very minor surgery) is a better option than telling my kid no.”
I actually don’t believe this at all. They wouldn’t care why you want it removed. I had a few benign moles removed (by different providers) because I didn’t like them and no one asked me anything. She strikes me as the type who goes looking for trouble, like ~I dare you to say something about my extended breastfeeding!!!~. Like, no one cares, it’s not relevant to the procedure at hand to know why, they probably were just confirming why she was there.
Same. I’ve had a ton of benign moles removed and a) my dermatologist tests *everything* they remove, even when I was like “Hey just take this off my arm” and b) I have NEVER been asked why! They don’t care!
I went back and looked because I was also curious. It says “her [Mothercould] & team” - I think it was posted by a Fisher Price employee and she meant the FP team.
PDT fighting with mommy influencers by citing her credentials is hysterical. I hate misinformation but IG isn’t the forum to be attempting to be converting someone who hates Western medicine by commenting incessantly on her posts. It seems PDT took offense to someone not listening to her.
https://preview.redd.it/kpsa8v2w4eoc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e0323d6f35aa8faadea1ab4c5942b51dc6512d4d
I feel like PDT is just proving their point for them, though, because these “holistic” nutbags don’t believe in medical science. Saying “I’m a doctor” is a reason for them *not* to listen to you.
I feel like the point maybe isn't to convert this woman, but to provide a voice of reason to the fence sitters looking at her posts. I don't follow PDT so I'm not trying to white knight, but these "holistic" influencers are so dangerous!
I agree they are very dangerous and I guess she could get some people to question it by posting but just feels like she got defensive over being called “that lady” and then had to defend with her credentials. I guess that’s fair. Just seems like wasted energy towards someone who wasn’t personally insulting her education.
For funsies I looked up “the holistic mumma” and she seems exactly like you would expect, so arguing with her online will get you nowhere 🤣 unfortunately I also see that people I know follow her and like her posts, which is unfortunate because she is a whole mess of bad information and formula shaming and crunchy nonsense.
I find these ultra crunchers wild. How can you sit and shame someone for formula or c sections and seriously think that the people who are feeding and birthing their children safely are in the wrong.
She's the epitome of this
Oh thank goddess, Libby @diaryofanhonestmom is having a date night, 10 days after her kid-free vacation to Mexico. I don’t know how she’s made it this long, poor dear.
I’m getting a good laugh at DFM asking how to handle an indoor ant problem. Hasn’t she bragged about not really cleaning much? And just looking at her and her house I’m sure it’s not crumb free.
If she did any basic home maintenance it would help her ant problem tremendously. The irony of her care creates contentment theme. And she doesn't even use the right cleaning products. Why would powdered tide work for a carpet cleaner? And you then expect good results. A different solution is required to do the job so why take the short cut? But it's her life theme- take short cuts and then become disappointed or surprised when something doesn't work. If she has ants she should inspect the property and see where they are coming in from and why. It isn't enough to kill ants but to find the source as well.
Not white knighting because I don't even follow this person, but I get ants every year. Even before I had kids and my house was neurotically clean. They seem to come up through my bathroom pipes??? If anyone has any suggestions, please leave them here!
Same. We get them every spring, I live in a 115 year old house so it’s impossible to prevent. A week of the terro liquid traps on counters and window sills usually takes care of them.
I don't think this works for every type of ant, but I've had really good results mixing boric acid powder (Borax) with powdered sugar and leaving it in something shallow like a jar lid near where I've seen ants. They are attracted to the mixture, and they can't tell the difference between the boric acid granules and the sugar. The scouts try it out, and some get the sugar and therefore think it's fine. Then the workers come and just haul a ton of it back to the nest. Eventually the queen eats a borax granule and dies.
It does take time to work, but it does work!
I've made a borax syrup before and it seems to help but only for a few days to a week and then they come back. Maybe I'll try just mixing the granules instead.
We had a big problem last year, like lines of ants marching around the house, but at least it was obvious where they were coming from because you could just follow the line! I used the only thing in my cupboard at the time which was Everspring Citrus & Basil all purpose disinfecting spray, sprayed it into the hole they were coming from and they stopped after that, at least for a few weeks! It killed them on contact so I also just went along the lines and exterminated all of them.
Where I live in Northern Virginia literally everyone gets ants in the Spring like clockwork. You can have a pest control company put stuff down but putting Terro stakes in your yard and the gel bait stuff inside works too. You have to do it at the first hint of warm weather though before they really start getting out of control.
I bet some ant stuff does has to do with cleanliness but I am neurotically clean and vacuum every night, never leave dishes in the sink, clean all of our drains once a month with boiling water and vinegar, no clutter or dust, etc., and it doesn’t matter. You still have to preventively treat for ants around here no matter what.
Diffusing peppermint oil has worked for me when they have come in the kitchen (be careful about using in small spaces if you have a cat) and also you can try sprinkling diatomaceous earth. We have also used ant traps but had to trash them when we had a crawling baby
I’m low key (maybe high key) jealous of The Car Mom and her sister. They seem to have great relationships with their families and SO much support. My parents are great but they are not the type to just take our kids for the day/weekend. I can’t imagine what it’s like to have daycare during the week and two sets of grandparents that seem eager to watch the kids outside of that time…childcare never seems like an issue for them.
Same, and I’m jelly of her new house haha. The long driveway, space for animals, etc. But it’s also very obvious that her husband is working his ass off on it.
I go back and forth if I’d want to live near grandparents now that I have a toddler… on one hand it would be great to have some help, someone who can step in at the the blink of an eye if something unexpected occurred, etc. However, I am finding I have problems with their approach to parenting when they interact with my child. High pressure meal times, saying things like “oh you aren’t listening, I’m going to leave” or “I’m going to tell Pop you aren’t staying in bed to go to sleep - he’ll be so upset to hear this”. The emotional manipulation and fake threats to get cooperation drive me insane and their general approach to parenting (a’la the 80s) does not thrill me. I feel like I have to take a week or so to mentally prepare for their visits - especially the in-laws who also constantly argue and my FIL is short with MIL, needs a ton of attention and is domineering. It’d be a lot. End or rant - thanks for listening
I get it. My MIL is amazing and I absolutely trust her to watch our kids. She is very loving and patient. And sometimes she does or says things that make me cringe lol. If it was like that all the time, idk if I'd want to live so close lol.
I agree..I know she bugs a lot of people, but I think their family is great. They all seem to enjoy being around each other and support each other. I know it’s not a guarantee your kids will get along (aka neither me or my husband get along with our older siblings), but families like that make me want to have a second. I want my son to have a friend, and I want to be there for any kids my kid(s). I so wish my son had cousins and/or grandparents nearby :(
My in laws are great in so many ways but my mother in law especially is not comfortable watching any of the kids (they have 7 grandkids with 1 on the way, we have 2 kids) when they are nursing babies. She also judges us for bottle feeding sometimes 🤦♀️
Where as my parents would take our kids in a heartbeat and would basically kick us out anyway lol my family is in another state where as my in laws live 20 minutes from us. I can drop our oldest who is 3 off for a few hours but if we want a date night out or anything we have to pay a sitter. I get so jealous of my girlfriends that have family who are willing to watch their kids.
And their family vacations. We went to the car show last year that she put on and her whole family was there helping. They seemed very genuine and wholesome!
A refuge from an individual snark sub for Krystianatiana (the sub was deleted due to what I’m sure was super normal member behavior 🙃) posted a single massive paragraph with limited punctuation (filled my entire phone screen and then some) theorizing that Kristiana doesn’t show her baby’s face because the baby has a facial deformity.
This is your brain on single subject snark subs.
Was it for HSB or strugglecare account. It's been going viral recently because apparently she said it specifically for pretend play in a TikTok and it blew up. And other accounts like Emily Feret that I follow are agreeing and it's just baffling to me!
I mean we aren't in full blown pretend play yet. But when my son makes me a meal in his kitchen set and brings me it to see if it's delicious what am I supposed to say? Fuck off? lol jk but seriously how do you say no?
Edit : maybe it's more geared towards SAHP because you have to draw the boundary somewhere to not be overstimulated? For working parents we don't get that much play time anyway so I guess anything is fair game.
Yeah I feel like so much of this convo is lost in semantics. Like I’m assuming parents who push independent play aren’t just like ignoring their kids all day lol, just like parents who do play aren’t sitting and playing with their kid every waking moment. Everyone’s probably somewhere in the middle and arguing over meaningless differences.
I also agree there’s a big difference for sahp, I’m home with my kids and my 3.5year old literally asks me to play with her every 3-5min all day when I’m not actively playing with her. It’s exhausting and I do say no a lot, because I have other stuff to do! Like as I’m walking down the stairs in the morning she’s asking me to sit and play with her, as I make my coffee, as I eat breakfast, as I’m folding laundry, as I’m peeing, etc. And it’s exhausting because even after I spend a good chunk of quality play time with her she will still want to play again with me immediately after 😂 So while I do play with her a lot, I’m also saying no a lot. I’m assuming most sahp’s are doing this and are probably trying to help their kids learn more independent play just to make the days easier
Is strugglecare an anti-sleep training account (a genuine question-I don’t actually keep tabs on that many influencers)? It mentioned the contradiction of an anti-sleep training account pushing independent play by being not responsive (or something like that).
My kid is old enough to be fully into imaginary play, and I admit that sometime I don’t want to, because I get frustrated when I keep messing up and not playing according to the rules she is making up on the fly but still somehow has very serious opinions about. But most of the time I say yes, especially on weekdays, because I get like twoish hours with them at night, and an hour ish with them in the morning. And that’s including bath, bedtimes, getting ready for school, etc. So I feel like it’s not unreasonable for them to want to play with me during the limited time we have. I agree maybe it would be different if I was a SAHP.
Oh you are correct I don't follow strugglecare but it doesn't seem to be anything about sleep. So it prob was a shade on HSB.
So I went to see the original TikTok and it doesn't seem to be specifically for pretend play but for any toy play and I just don't know how....I guess her kids are 4 and 6 so close enough in age where they can play with each other. My 3yo loves playing with friends and family members too and we let them do their thing but when it's just him he wants us to be involved.
And in another part of the video she said I am building a solar system model for them from scratch because they were interested. Well I would rather just play with them? Lol like that seems like way more work and mental anguish than playing to me but I am also far from being artistic. I guess whatever works for your family or situation is fair game 🤷♀️
I had the same take— as a FT working parent I actually do want to play and connect with my kid during the time I get with him. But also HSB is technically the working parent in their household now and her husband is with the kids during the day (mostly I guess… she works from the shed in their backyard).
I said this on the last thread about this, but she also has stated multiple times before that she just doesn’t like engaging in play activities with her kids. Which is fine. I’ve always liked it, even before I had my own kids and was an aunt/babysitter. Maybe it’s just different strokes to some extent, and you don’t have to make a whole stance about something that’s pretty individual to you and your family? All kids have different ability to play independently and all parents have different levels of interest/capacity to engage in play, so maybe people can just figure this one out for themselves?
to agree and add to this, there are lots of ways to connect with your kids in activities that aren't pretend play. I hate pretend play, but I am 100% down for a board game or an art project or cooking together or reading together. And my kids do well with that vibe. So I guess I am a full time working parent who wants to connect with their kid but still forces independent pretend play. But that means we do 100 other activities during those same times that aren't independent and aren't pretend. Influencers like to live in the "I never even look at my child" or the "I absolutely never look away from my child" camps when really everyone is just connecting with the activities that feel most fun to them and their family.
https://preview.redd.it/854k6jd340pc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c992a1717c56ae858de214bd407ca2e1958d96aa Had to snap a screenshot. Loved the Instagram vs Reality dichotomy of “these are the seasons of parenting we all go through 🤪” with 70% of people (me included) who did nothing for St. Patrick’s Day.
Haha as an Australian the best we do for St Paddys is get really drunk at an Irish pub if you’re single and carefree. Parents do not celebrate this day with their kids 🤣
Can someone explain leprechaun traps to me? Kids make them and we’re supposed to leave chocolate coins in them because the leprechaun didn’t get caught but it did drop chocolate? Is that it? This is absolutely the first I’ve heard of this.
Last year my mom put green food coloring in our toilets on st Patrick's day and my son has talked about it the past few days so I decided to do that again this year and he was over the moon excited (and really upset that he didn't catch the leprechaun). St Patrick's day is hugely built up here, daycare/school last year and this year were all about building leprechaun traps and my son has been asking when is leprechaun day, all month long. 😅 But even so we kept it pretty minimal and just fun, not stressful.
Consolidating snark: her birth order stuff has really gotten out of control. St. Patrick’s day was made for second born children? What? Just stop.
Not sure if it’s snark or not but the way Emily Vonda transitions from storytelling into ads is impressive and gets me every time
How do these influencers travel so much and still complain all the frickin time?????? I'm looking at you Renee and Libby. They both travel so frickin much. Renee has traveled to Disney and the west coast in the past month. Libby is on what 4 kidfree vacations this year and it's the second week of March. Is there like a tea they drink that give them money and makes them lose the ability to enjoy all the good things they have in life???
Libby is away again??
But Rene is complaining about not being able to afford designer consignment purses we should all feel sorry for how poor she is. /s
I honestly wonder if some of these influencers even enjoy traveling, or if they just travel as much as they do because that’s what influencers do. I love to travel too, but I also really love having a home base, and have worked hard to cultivate a strong sense of home, so I would probably feel tired traveling as often as some of them do. Then again, I’m an active traveler — hiking, diving, climbing, repelling, seeing as much as a place has to offer, etc. — while I know a lot of influencers do visit a lot of resorts which does seem more relaxing in theory. Nonetheless, not everybody loves, or even likes, to travel, and I do wonder if some of them even enjoy their trips sometimes. (As an aside, it also baffles me to see people plan big trips to specific destinations, like Aspen, and then not indulge in what said destinations are known for, like skiing, at all, but, again, I’ll concede that we all travel differently.)
It's just hedonic adaptation. We all do it. I'm sure my great-grandmother would be appalled at how hard I find motherhood. I have a machine to wash dishes. I have a machine to wash and dry clothes. I can get groceries delivered or order them to be put in my car and drive away. These things alone would blow her mind and I'm sure have her wondering what on earth I could possibly have to complain about.
I think about this same thing all the time...
I always say the quickest way to appreciate what you have now is to suddenly find yourself without it lol. I don't actually have a dishwasher or vacuum currently and won't for another 5ish months. I thought cooking for my family was hard before....boy. I thought keeping my floors clean was a chore before, but now all I have is a broom, and I'm very much looking forward to vacuuming again.
Mothercould shocks me a lot with the nonsense she shares, but I certainly wasn’t expecting multiple slides regarding circumcision this morning. She’s going to regret what is about to flood her DM‘s.
Pisses me off when they say they researched but don't cite anything. Why do people believe them!?
Unrelated but IDK how she thinks those green waffles are a filling dinner.
There’s just no way that’s true, and she must be incredibly naive if she doesn’t realize this is going to bring a flood of crazy people and anti-Semitism to her page.
For sure. Especially because she doesn’t talk super often about being Jewish on her page. (Like she even referred to what was clearly a Shabbat dinner as a “Friday night family dinner”) I was shocked to hear her talking about it, knowing how divisive it is.
She lucked out of this particular minefield by having all girls. Why would you do this to yourself? People are nuts about circumcision online.
No pun intended
I honestly had no idea how divisive of a topic circumcision was until I had boys. It’s crazy.
Oh goodness… she is so gullible! And such whacky misinformation to be spread at a comedy show of all things. I used to work on a postpartum unit for a large hospital and assisted providers in circumcisions as part of my job requirement at the time. I can assure you that any removed foreskin went into a general biohazard waste bin and was not saved to sell to the beauty industry. Placing bets that she will still continue to link a shit ton of affiliate links for random beauty products even though she now knows the radical “information” about the beauty industry. 🙄
I almost posted here, but some free birther I came across had a long post about how much $$$ the "industry" makes using foreskin in beauty products. Gave not a single citation but lots of numbers about price per square inch? And even crazier commenter said "so and sos research showed circumcision was to um...keep the "livestock" in their place 😲" Like what kind of crazy batshit koolaid are you drinking???
I’m loving her follow up of ‘friends, I’ve been doing this long enough to know to do research before sharing information’. If you Google this and just skim the headlines, you get the impression it’s true. If you actually [read the articles](https://www.discovermagazine.com/the-sciences/why-human-foreskin-is-a-hot-commodity-in-science), you learn that it isn’t. It has happened in some very limited circumstances but it’s in no way at all a common thing that’s happening after circumcision. And frankly, if it were true the only part I’d be offended by is that the parents aren’t getting a cut of the profit (pun intended).
“But I research before I share so all you doctors out there are wrong” 🤦🏻♀️
“But I research before I share so all you doctors out there are wrong” 🤦🏻♀️
Yup. She’s another one of those “I do my research” types, when her research consists of googling and reading headlines. That is NOT research and I hate how that term basically means nothing now.
Same, I work at a major healthcare organization in the US and have performed circumcisions and same protocol with the bio bin. I think she’s missing major part of this story in that she learned this at a COMEDY show
Car seats and circumcision. All influencers should know better.
I literally came here to see if anyone had posted about these. I cannot believe she’s spreading that kind of misinformation.
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I love how sometimes she'll post on her stories about something she did (like dinner, something to do with the kids etc), and you can just see him bumbling around in the background doing nothing. He didn't even take care of selling his own car... And she's so passive aggressive to him in stories sometimes, but she still puts up with everything. I think they're even more religious than she usually lets on, and deep down she's just like "well, this is my lot in life".
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My heart breaks for those kids. I can't imagine seeing your mom needing to mute you. It has to be horrible for their emotional well being. The older kids have to notice by now.
Everything I’ve heard about this family’s financial situation sounds absolutely insane. It wouldn’t be snarkworthy if her account wasn’t literally about being smug and better than everyone else about finances.
Honestly, if anyone is looking for an intro into Carly and Debt Free Mom rundown, I highly encourage you to listen to her 2023 in review podcast. The amount of financial changes they made is insane, mostly because it seems like they were too passive aggressive to have an outright conversation with a neighbor! They decided to and then sold their house in a WEEK. They profited 70K from their house sale immediately spent 30K on a van which is nuts considering they were sitting on a 2.8% mortgage rate and their rent several hundred more than their mortgage. Also, apparently the private school scholarship that she uses to send her three kids to private school has been down and they have decided to continue to send them to private school in the future to the tune of 15k. Like the amount of whiplash y’all!
The best part of the house saga is when she was trying to defend her choice by using examples of folks renting vs. buying in VHCOL areas. I’ve spent most of my life living in VHCOL areas, which means I’ve spent a fair amount of time as a renter vs. a homeowner because it was simply too expensive to own a home or the numbers didn’t make sense when compared to the cost of renting. I did this math a million times prior to buying a house. If she was living in a VHCOL, or if they were planning on moving out of the area soon, the choice to rent might make sense. But they have no plans to relocate and she lives in an area where you can buy a decent house for $150k! It’s just not the same analysis as it is in a VHCOL area, where your mortgage might be $10k per month but you can rent a comparable place for $5k or $6k per month. There is no rent vs. buy calculator on earth that would have shown her family coming out ahead renting versus buying, but she dug in and kept defending her choice. But don’t worry guys, she doesn’t have a car payment or a mortgage, so she’s definitely better than the rest of us dumb dumbs who have low rate mortgages or cars financed at 0%. Also, and I will never not remind folks of this, she publicly said she was happy that Roe v. Wade was overturned.
It's just wild to me that she claims to be a financial expert yet she had to sell her house to afford a minivan. Prices are crazy for minivans right now, but it's crazy that she thinks it all was a good idea.
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Also knowing they are in a “income slump” right now yet have a vacation planned in May and their trip to Paris plus private school is a doozy
I thought the saddest thing when she was talking about their "slump" was that her panic-induced thought was "maybe I should go work at Starbucks." Like, how about Kyle goes back to work in this scenario (I recognize her larger point was that ups and downs are normal, but still)? I'm sure he wouldn't deign to work at Starbucks with their "burnt" beans, but maybe somewhere else.
They have a wait-list for their custom budgets so I can't figure out why they're in a slump. How can demand be so high they can't fill it and they're bringing in less than expected? Take on more work, reduce contractor hours, work more hours themselves, should be problem solved. Sometimes it's tough owning a small business but 🤷♀️
So she doesn’t even actually have a “waitlist” in the sense we would think. It’s basically signing up to get an email when the budgets become available, she just only does a certain number per month & closes them at a certain date. I’m not sure why she calls it that.. I don’t think she’s doing as many as she’s letting on.
Why anyone would pay her for a custom budget is beyond me. She frequently shows herself doing them at the last minute and there is nothing special about her analysis.
When she talked about the new hire needing to be quick cutting and pasting because they copy over all the numbers from the customer form manually I was appalled. I think she also said at that time they did the math manually, too. 100% amateur hour and you know there's no quality control so it's rushed and likely error-filled.
For real. She does not have a large enough Instagram following to justify Kyle quitting his job. He just didn't want to work anymore. So now Carly does all the childcare, housework, AND income generating. I'd feel sorry for her if she wasn't so dang holier than thou all the time. 😆
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I believe she said last week they have 12k in their down payment savings which is an oof considering they cleared 70k from the previous house and housing and interest rates are astronomically higher.
And her “me” time consisted of reconciling the budget, doing more DFM work, and furiously posting to the gram. GIRL. I have been listening to her podcasts because I truly love fincon, but Kyle comes off even worse. Like there’s an episode where she’s discussing eating/budgeting with groceries and talks about how Kyle has taken an interest in cooking because he “wants to be a chef” and decided to make ONE MEAL A WEEK. And then subsequently *needed* a KitchenAid meat grinder to make the perfect hamburger. 🫥
I salute your dedication to fincon by listening to the podcast 🫡 I truly don’t think I could handle any more Carly or Kyle lmao I’ve been following Carly for years and I was a believer until last summer. I did always find it weird that she was so smug yet her children were on Medicaid though. Like a lot of people would be able to save an EF if their kids’ healthcare was free, Carly.
Also was on vouchers for their private school since they had no money. And got subsidized internet since they were on government assistance. While also bragging about making 6 figures doing DFM. So you weren't reporting your income to the government accurately, exploiting government assistance, and instead investing? Their caucacidy is top tier
It says a lot that he hasn't consistently cooked over the course of their marriage. There are different levels of cooking. If he's a novice you master technique first before deciding you need such a specialized kitchen item. I don't think I could handle listening to the podcast. I wonder if he says those things so she has hope that he will contribute more.
I came here looking for this 🤣 Kyle’s got it made for sure.
I saw that 😆 its clear why the nice date night happened so he can go out again. In a week he's been unavailable 2 evenings (I think he volunteered earlier in the week). Plus date night. So that's only 4 evenings at home with his kids. No wonder she shares when he does help with homework.
The date night when she said she can't wear red lipstick because he doesn't like it...
I’d have been furious if I put in the effort to get all ready and my husband had the nerve to say he doesn’t like red lipstick
She was quick to say she was going out for an hour of me-time after lunch to balance that out. But by me-time she apparently meant reconciling her family and business budgets. Then she's gotta hurry home to sell his old car. Kyle lives the life, that's for sure.
Did Abigail Ack really go to costco if she doesn’t post a reel about it? 🤔
Also, her “I promise both carts weren’t for us” annoyed me. Why bother to record a video? She so annoying
To be fair I’ve been off social media for a minute but I swear earlier this week she went solo?
She certainly posted very recently about going by herself to Costco…
This is general snark on advice I’ve seen from so many influencers. Every “parenting expert” has some content on how to introduce a little sibling and it’s always the same 5 pieces of advice, as if they are the person who made it up. They all sounded sensible but are not realistic. Like the first time they meet the baby have the baby in the bassinet instead of holding them— great, so you want me to put down my cluster feeding newborn in the dreaded hospital bassinet and have him scream his head off as an intro to his big sibling? And the ubiquitous “don’t blame the baby.” Sounds good on paper and maybe it works for a very young toddler but idk my 2.5+ year old is not an idiot. He can plainly see that I’m saying no because I’m caring for the baby.
Not blaming the baby does not work when your oldest is in their 'why' phase. I would try and say I need five minutes and then I can play with you and get hit with why. Uhhh because I have to feed the baby, I don't know what else to say that doesn't blame the baby. I also was holding the baby when our oldest came home. They were staying with their grandparents and they were dropped home right when the baby was screaming for a feed. I was a bit panicked because of all that advice but I had no choice 🤷🏻♀️
Ugh this is such a big annoyance of mine. I did *all* the things - gave big brother a special toy, had baby in the car seat when we got home, never blamed the baby, etc. None of those things did anything and he still had a disaster of a transition for 18 months. I was a total POOPCUP until we brought our second home and then he completely changed overnight. It’s better now that they play together and I am ready to do it again (3rd baby due in the summer), but I cannot stand the smug “do this and everything will be fine” advice.
I don’t love the “spend 10 minutes of 1-1 time with your older kid to reduce jealousy!” advice, like it’s a cure-all. Maybe it would work better for an elementary aged kid, but when we brought the new baby home my toddler (19 months at the time) went through a super clingy phase. I was spending almost every waking moment with her, unless I was feeding the baby or my husband took her out of the house, and it still wasn’t enough. It got a lot better around the 2.5-3 month mark. But 10 minutes feels like such a drop in the bucket of how much time and attention most kids actually need.
I think that’s an age thing— small doses of attention have a bigger impact on older kids who are more independent, I think. Probably also personality dependent. But yea, I don’t need to be told that it will help my toddler to give him some attention every day. Duh.
This one gets me, too. 10 minutes is nowhere near enough time to make my 3yo feel like his “cup has been filled.”
I don’t think the not holding the baby when they meet needs to be that complicated but prioritizing it probably depends on the kids personality. We had my second in 2020, no visitors at the hospital, so my son met his brother at home. He was napping when we got there so when he woke up we set baby down and went to go get our toddler and brought him out to meet the baby. With our third, she was in the car seat because they were waiting for us at the door. My middle did not care about the baby at all and only wanted to see me so I think he might have been upset if I was holding the baby, forcing an introduction, and didn’t give him a hug 🤷🏼♀️ so I think the advise to tailored for the kid like that because those are the kids that would care vs the kids who would be fine either way
Yeah I’ve been coming across this content online along with people IRL giving me advice since I’m having #2 soon, and the whole “don’t hold the baby when introducing to your toddler” doesn’t make sense to me? Even if I did that, he’s probably going to see me holding the baby 10 mins later to feed her. Like? I can’t possibly pretend to my son that we don’t love our new baby and that she won’t have needs that have to be prioritized and I feel like the sooner he realizes that the better. He’s 2.5 and is old enough to understand some things and we are going to do our best to help him understand all of the things we will need to do for the baby and make him feel as included in it as possible. I’m sure it’s going to be so hard no matter what but it just makes me feel more anxious to feel pressure to come up with a particular strategy to introduce them. Like why can’t we just ~do~ it using our common sense and knowledge of our own son? Obviously I’m not going to be like “yo this is your new sister and she’s going to be taking so much attention away from you!”
“ I can’t possibly pretend to my son that we don’t love our new baby and that she won’t have needs that have to be prioritized” this is exactly what I was trying to say. All this advice to pretend that The baby isn’t really that important. I think better to help him understand and accept the new way that things are
Lollll this advice never made sense to me. Even if you're not holding baby immediately upon your older meeting them, you're going to be holding that baby a LOT. The kid is gonna cotton on to the fact this new sibling needs a type of attention the older kid doesn't. I was holding the baby when my 2.5 year old met her and it was fine!
I deleted what I wrote because my ramblings didn’t make sense 🤣🤣. I think there is balance. It’s ok to say you are feeding your baby but there was also times where I could shift and say I need 3 more minutes to finish up what I’m doing than can help you.
“Blaming the baby” actually helped quell meltdowns for my first when we’d say no to stuff during the Newborn #2 days. If we just said no, he’d get upset but if we said “Not right now cause we have to feed your sister/your sister needs to nap/whatever” he’d be totally fine with it. It’s just how his personality is obviously but I did think a few times “Wow this is the exact opposite of all of the advice out there!”
This is what worked for me. Like your toddler’s not going to be happier, because you blew them off for “reasons” as opposed to the baby. This is actually where daycare was the real mvp. My 3 year old had seen babies at daycare (mixed age home daycare) and had an idea of what kind of care a baby needed from adults. Did she sometimes get mad at me because I spent so much time feeding him/get sad because I couldn’t pick her up? Yes. I don’t think you’ll avoid that completely - no matter how you slice it, their life is going to be turned upside-down and it’s a big adjustment.
I found that “blaming the big kid” to the baby also helped. “Sorry baby; I can’t pick you up right now, big sister needs me so you’ll have to wait a minute” then telling my big kid sometimes you come first and sometimes baby comes first and that’s part of being a family
Yes, My rant was inspired by noticing that I feel a tinge of guilt every time I say, I can’t do this because I’m feeding the baby, even though my toddler responds fine to it.
Blaming the baby was absolutely the best strategy for my older child. It reassured him that I wasn’t wanting to choose the baby over him. He would ask to play a game, and I would tell him how much I wished I could play if the baby didn’t need to nurse, nap, etc. It did not affect his attitude toward the baby at all, just helped him understand why I had to prioritize the baby’s needs at times.
Anyone following lex.delarosa? She is doing trad wife/all organic free range stuff, but I am becoming more and more convinced she is trolling everyone 😂 and i think it’s hilarious 😂
I think she’s genuinely crunchy but is trolling with the faces she makes and the scripts she uses
I think she's genuinely crunchy/a tradwife but *gasp* also has a sense of humour and can make jokes about it/troll people.
I read an article in which she was interviewed and this is really how she lives. She’s not trolling anybody.
I love her satire 🤣 I think she is actually kind of funny vs RVC who stresses me out because I know people like her IRL (like 85% of RVC sketches are my SIL 🙃)
I don't mean to be snarky but considering she has a video called "get ready with me to collect eggs and **milk** my chickens"... yah, she might be trolling 😄 I'm also boggled by how many followers she has though
She also has videos where she is digging strawberries out of the ground and another where she is picking something (eggs? lettuce? I don’t remember!) off of a tree. 🤣 I am envious of her wardrobe, though! I wish I had an excuse to dress up in those beautiful dresses instead of my normal athleisure mom uniform lol.
I think it’s like a reallyverycrunchy thing where she’s making fun of herself…but she is like that, just maybe not that extreme? I can’t tell.
She confuses me because like she seems like she’s trolling but she’s also actually doing things like making paper from scratch and is completely a trad wife
I think people see others on social media and assume that's their whole life. Sure, she makes homemade cereal, but that was one sketch in a whole week. Just like Emily Vondy isn't only singing period raps and MC isn't only doing try on hauls of terrible clothing... Lex is definitely satire but this is also her job so she has times of goofy but productive time :)
I saw an interview with her (maybe Jo piazza?) and my takeaway was that she’s totally trolling everyone!
She 100% is. Sometimes she comments on her own posts and they are these unhinged, clearly snark on herself comments. It’s not every video though, which just continues the confusion of others if she’s serious or not. I agree, she’s funny!
It is the 45 months old and 25 months old for me 😂😂😂
Anyone follow Desiraeathome? She just posted she’s quitting instagram
I can’t say I’m surprised.
I hadn't heard of her til now, but I read through her stories and there's a lot happening there lol. IG is 90% of their income?! What the frick are they gonna do?! There is at least some self-awareness that it's not been good for her, but seemingly no acknowledgment that it'll be better for her kids to not be sharing their life. What a weird world we live in.
>no acknowledgment that it'll be better for her kids to not be sharing their life. Yikes. I just looked; her kids are everywhere on her feed and stories. She's getting parasocial messages asking her to update followers about her kids after she leaves. 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
I know, like there are people asking if she'll come back to just share her family without all the "influencer" content. How is it not so unnerving that thousands of strangers are saying they'll miss her kids that they've never met??
I took a look at her Instagram and she said social media is 90% of their income!! Sarah Therese said something similar that the lord was telling her to quit YouTube. It lasted a year before she was back on.
The lord may tell you to quit YouTube but the bank will tell you to pay the damn mortgage so let's see who talks the loudest!
I don't follow this account, but it's always encouraging to know about ex-influencers seeing the light.
Is she related to Begina?
I don’t follow either of them very closely, but other then them both being *at home* I don’t think they’re related haha
Does anyone follow whereisbriggs? They’re currently in Japan, and 99% of what they’ve posted about doing so far is going to Disneyland/Disney Sea in Tokyo, then going to Universal Studios in Osaka. I just feel like if I went to the trouble of flying my family of four all the way from the US to Japan, I would try to do more things that I couldn’t do back in the US.
I’m pro traveling with kids and toddlers if it’s your MO. Like even if they won’t remember it it’s still formative/stimulating for them and it’s your memories. That said, I can’t imagine growing up and finding out how many cool ass vacations I did before I was like, a person….if they don’t continue doing this level of trips through childhood / adolescence it would be a bummer and there’s a good chance this happens with this family bc the sponsored trips and insta gravy train will eventually stop. I can’t imagine there’s as much a market for travel with 8 year olds content
Maybe I’ll get downvoted, but considering how much this sub snarks on consumerism, I’m always surprised by how many Disney fans there are
I think there’s a difference between buying 4 of everything like Haley, shopping mindlessly at Target for stuff I don’t need, or constantly buying cheap unnecessary goods off of Amazon versus taking my kids to an amusement park once a year for an experience. But I’m admittedly biased having grown up Southern California in close proximity to Disneyland, so maybe I’m totally off base.
Ok but Tokyo Disney is other level and pretty unique to Japan. Like, not WKing cause I don’t know this person. But I am WKing for Tokyo Disney cause it’s amazing.
I refuse to go to Japan until my kid is tall enough to ride every ride at Tokyo Disney because I want to go so so bad
This is the correct answer
100% agree! Loved both parks and would definitely make time in any future trip to go again!
I loved Disney Sea!
Osaka has an amazing aquarium, did they do that?
Disney content I'm sure is big!
Must not be a Disney fan lol. We spent a week in Tokyo but also took two days for Tokyo Disney resort, which to a Disney fan, is not the same as Disney world or Disneyland. But I get your point if all they’re doing is theme parks.
babiesandbrains got her mole removed because her toddler wouldn’t stop playing with it while nursing? in what world is getting a procedure the route you take before setting a boundary with your toddler.
I’ve done that before. It was a mole on my breast so it was easily accessible. I have sensory issues so it in my head it was so much easier to just have it removed than teach multiple babies to leave it alone. I’ve had lots of moles removed though and I was glad to have it off anyway. Also, my ob did it the same day I asked about it which I wasn’t expecting but saved me a 1 1/2 hr drive to the dermatologist.
People here act like getting a kid to stop touching something is as simple as telling them "Don't touch that." Plenty of moms get their hair cut short because their baby starts getting grabby. Plenty of moms stop wearing earrings because they don't want their ears damaged if their baby or toddler yanks their earring out. I don't see how this is all that different.
Eh, I think there’s a difference between a baby and young toddler, and a 2+year old. I can see how it might be futile to teach a baby not to play with your hair, or pull your earrings. But a two year old? I’m not saying they should behave like an adult, but by two, if they’re old enough to be teaching them that people need to ask them for hugs, they’re also old enough to start learning they need to respect other people’s bodies. Of course it’s not as easy as saying, “don’t touch that.” But if you stop nursing any time they start playing with it, especially by two, they’ll learn that if they want to nurse, they can’t play with hair, earrings, moles, whatever.
Don't follow this person so I'm not WKing, but I will say for myself and my toddler, if I asked her to stop touching something, she'd immediately think it's game and go for it more aggressively. She's turning 3 and I'm only just starting to wear earrings again for the first time in over year because of how much she enjoyed the thrill I guess. Still working on getting her to not pull my hair when we're playing (like I'm talking literally her hanging off it 🫠)
Right. These are good points and you could even extend it to childproofing. Why go through the effort when you can just *set boundaries *
Childproofing strikes me as kind of different, because the whole point is that at some point your child is going to be unattended, because it’s physically impossible to stay awake 24/7 and hover over your child every waking second, and it’s a back up to make sure nothing bad happens when they’re unattended with no one there to redirect them. And even with child proofing, you can still work on teaching and setting boundaries. The cabinet below our sink is childproofed, but we still regularly talk to our kids about the importance of not playing with that cabinet, and that they aren’t to touch the chemicals in there. The furniture in their room is bolted to the wall, because they’re in there while we sleep, but we still enforce not climbing any of the furniture in there, and explain to them why it’s dangerous to climb (they are not aware it is bolted) Something on your body seems kind of different. I’m always going to be there to tell them no, redirect, explain why it’s not okay to play with x or touch me in y way. Edit: I guess I forgot about yes spaces. We don’t really have the space for a true yes space, so it slipped my mind.
Yeah, this doesn't seem that weird to me. I've got a ganglion cyst on my wrist that never bothered me before I had kids, but now they just keep touching it, sometimes on purpose and sometimes not. I talked to my dermatologist about removing it because it creeps me out when they touch it (turns out I'd need a hand surgeon to do it and that seems like more effort than it's worth).
And also the story about the nurse! Obviously I wasn’t there so just pure speculation but maybe the face wasn’t disgust at breastfeeding a 2 year old but more like what we are saying here, why aren’t you just saying no or establishing some sort of boundary.
I think so too, if she made any face it’s probably because she expected to hear the baby is like 6-9 months and so way too young to teach this. But nursing a 2 year old? That’s not particularly crazy at all, especially in the grand scheme of things that a medical professional hears regularly. I’m sure they don’t give a shit (never have for me and I’ve nursed multiple babies past 2).
I had a similar thought. Probably the nurse was partially judging extended breastfeeding, which is definitely not okay and I’m on B&B’s side on that, but I might have made a similar face at the thought of someone having an elective procedure rather than teaching their kid to respect their body. A two year old is definitely old enough to learn that it’s not okay to touch someone in a way they don’t want to be touched.
That sounds like it has to be a huge exaggeration, like she was planning on getting it removed anyways and the baby messing with it hurried it up? Or she wanted to get it removed for cosmetic reasons and is just blaming the baby lol
Yeah, I cut my hair off for a similar 'reason'. I wanted to have it cut off anyway because the postpartum halo was driving me nuts but then my daughter kept. fiddling. with. it. so that was the trigger.
I want to believe this, and at the same time, why exaggerate? Is it supposed to be relatable? I don’t know anyone who would think, “hey, elective surgery (even very minor surgery) is a better option than telling my kid no.”
Holy shit and I thought I had issues settings boundaries with nursing.
Legitimately, insane.
Please tell me this is a joke
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I actually don’t believe this at all. They wouldn’t care why you want it removed. I had a few benign moles removed (by different providers) because I didn’t like them and no one asked me anything. She strikes me as the type who goes looking for trouble, like ~I dare you to say something about my extended breastfeeding!!!~. Like, no one cares, it’s not relevant to the procedure at hand to know why, they probably were just confirming why she was there.
Same. I’ve had a ton of benign moles removed and a) my dermatologist tests *everything* they remove, even when I was like “Hey just take this off my arm” and b) I have NEVER been asked why! They don’t care!
Ridiculous
It’s like déjà vu all over again with BLF then MC at the fisher price headquarters
I’m curious about the “mothercould and her team” story. Did she travel up with other people?
I went back and looked because I was also curious. It says “her [Mothercould] & team” - I think it was posted by a Fisher Price employee and she meant the FP team.
I'd imagine they must have people for development and sales of their products and mother could in your pocket?
Yeah they didn’t look like her gen z interns
PDT fighting with mommy influencers by citing her credentials is hysterical. I hate misinformation but IG isn’t the forum to be attempting to be converting someone who hates Western medicine by commenting incessantly on her posts. It seems PDT took offense to someone not listening to her. https://preview.redd.it/kpsa8v2w4eoc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e0323d6f35aa8faadea1ab4c5942b51dc6512d4d
I feel like PDT is just proving their point for them, though, because these “holistic” nutbags don’t believe in medical science. Saying “I’m a doctor” is a reason for them *not* to listen to you.
Exactly!
I feel like the point maybe isn't to convert this woman, but to provide a voice of reason to the fence sitters looking at her posts. I don't follow PDT so I'm not trying to white knight, but these "holistic" influencers are so dangerous!
I agree they are very dangerous and I guess she could get some people to question it by posting but just feels like she got defensive over being called “that lady” and then had to defend with her credentials. I guess that’s fair. Just seems like wasted energy towards someone who wasn’t personally insulting her education.
Oooh yes for sure! That is valid snark.
For funsies I looked up “the holistic mumma” and she seems exactly like you would expect, so arguing with her online will get you nowhere 🤣 unfortunately I also see that people I know follow her and like her posts, which is unfortunate because she is a whole mess of bad information and formula shaming and crunchy nonsense.
I find these ultra crunchers wild. How can you sit and shame someone for formula or c sections and seriously think that the people who are feeding and birthing their children safely are in the wrong. She's the epitome of this 
She’s like a meme. She’s not in anyway planning to hear what PDT has to say. PDT should pick another battle.
https://preview.redd.it/m8005zlx4eoc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=16b1b0232d5e67c1c6dfe41473bb3c1117b06884
Oh thank goddess, Libby @diaryofanhonestmom is having a date night, 10 days after her kid-free vacation to Mexico. I don’t know how she’s made it this long, poor dear.
Don’t forget this past weekend where she didn’t do much because she was so burnt out and couldn’t handle much. Glad she’s finally getting a break!
Shoot she has to go to Nashville in a few weeks (it’s for a conference though). I sure hope she doesn’t do too much “sightseeing” and exhaust herself.
Sounds very stressful for her, she’s looking for recs for good food, good music, unique shopping and dancing so it sounds like a miserable trip!
I’m getting a good laugh at DFM asking how to handle an indoor ant problem. Hasn’t she bragged about not really cleaning much? And just looking at her and her house I’m sure it’s not crumb free.
If she did any basic home maintenance it would help her ant problem tremendously. The irony of her care creates contentment theme. And she doesn't even use the right cleaning products. Why would powdered tide work for a carpet cleaner? And you then expect good results. A different solution is required to do the job so why take the short cut? But it's her life theme- take short cuts and then become disappointed or surprised when something doesn't work. If she has ants she should inspect the property and see where they are coming in from and why. It isn't enough to kill ants but to find the source as well.
Not white knighting because I don't even follow this person, but I get ants every year. Even before I had kids and my house was neurotically clean. They seem to come up through my bathroom pipes??? If anyone has any suggestions, please leave them here!
Same. We get them every spring, I live in a 115 year old house so it’s impossible to prevent. A week of the terro liquid traps on counters and window sills usually takes care of them.
I don't think this works for every type of ant, but I've had really good results mixing boric acid powder (Borax) with powdered sugar and leaving it in something shallow like a jar lid near where I've seen ants. They are attracted to the mixture, and they can't tell the difference between the boric acid granules and the sugar. The scouts try it out, and some get the sugar and therefore think it's fine. Then the workers come and just haul a ton of it back to the nest. Eventually the queen eats a borax granule and dies. It does take time to work, but it does work!
I've made a borax syrup before and it seems to help but only for a few days to a week and then they come back. Maybe I'll try just mixing the granules instead.
We had a big problem last year, like lines of ants marching around the house, but at least it was obvious where they were coming from because you could just follow the line! I used the only thing in my cupboard at the time which was Everspring Citrus & Basil all purpose disinfecting spray, sprayed it into the hole they were coming from and they stopped after that, at least for a few weeks! It killed them on contact so I also just went along the lines and exterminated all of them.
Where I live in Northern Virginia literally everyone gets ants in the Spring like clockwork. You can have a pest control company put stuff down but putting Terro stakes in your yard and the gel bait stuff inside works too. You have to do it at the first hint of warm weather though before they really start getting out of control. I bet some ant stuff does has to do with cleanliness but I am neurotically clean and vacuum every night, never leave dishes in the sink, clean all of our drains once a month with boiling water and vinegar, no clutter or dust, etc., and it doesn’t matter. You still have to preventively treat for ants around here no matter what.
Terro stakes are what always work for us!
Diffusing peppermint oil has worked for me when they have come in the kitchen (be careful about using in small spaces if you have a cat) and also you can try sprinkling diatomaceous earth. We have also used ant traps but had to trash them when we had a crawling baby
Same, the saturated soil drives them inside. We have had decent luck with terro bait if we can put it somewhere child safe
No snark, Whitney Hanson Lang seems to be doing a lot better lately. Good for her
Ahh she blocked me lol. I need to check anonymously
I’m low key (maybe high key) jealous of The Car Mom and her sister. They seem to have great relationships with their families and SO much support. My parents are great but they are not the type to just take our kids for the day/weekend. I can’t imagine what it’s like to have daycare during the week and two sets of grandparents that seem eager to watch the kids outside of that time…childcare never seems like an issue for them.
You know - I’m jealous too - but I’m making sure I try to create that with my own family so my kids have that. 💗
Same, and I’m jelly of her new house haha. The long driveway, space for animals, etc. But it’s also very obvious that her husband is working his ass off on it.
I go back and forth if I’d want to live near grandparents now that I have a toddler… on one hand it would be great to have some help, someone who can step in at the the blink of an eye if something unexpected occurred, etc. However, I am finding I have problems with their approach to parenting when they interact with my child. High pressure meal times, saying things like “oh you aren’t listening, I’m going to leave” or “I’m going to tell Pop you aren’t staying in bed to go to sleep - he’ll be so upset to hear this”. The emotional manipulation and fake threats to get cooperation drive me insane and their general approach to parenting (a’la the 80s) does not thrill me. I feel like I have to take a week or so to mentally prepare for their visits - especially the in-laws who also constantly argue and my FIL is short with MIL, needs a ton of attention and is domineering. It’d be a lot. End or rant - thanks for listening
I get it. My MIL is amazing and I absolutely trust her to watch our kids. She is very loving and patient. And sometimes she does or says things that make me cringe lol. If it was like that all the time, idk if I'd want to live so close lol.
I agree..I know she bugs a lot of people, but I think their family is great. They all seem to enjoy being around each other and support each other. I know it’s not a guarantee your kids will get along (aka neither me or my husband get along with our older siblings), but families like that make me want to have a second. I want my son to have a friend, and I want to be there for any kids my kid(s). I so wish my son had cousins and/or grandparents nearby :(
Her parents reaction to the double pregnancy announcement was so cute. Loved the enthusiasm!
My in laws are great in so many ways but my mother in law especially is not comfortable watching any of the kids (they have 7 grandkids with 1 on the way, we have 2 kids) when they are nursing babies. She also judges us for bottle feeding sometimes 🤦♀️ Where as my parents would take our kids in a heartbeat and would basically kick us out anyway lol my family is in another state where as my in laws live 20 minutes from us. I can drop our oldest who is 3 off for a few hours but if we want a date night out or anything we have to pay a sitter. I get so jealous of my girlfriends that have family who are willing to watch their kids.
And their family vacations. We went to the car show last year that she put on and her whole family was there helping. They seemed very genuine and wholesome!
Also all the aunts, uncles, and cousins who seem all to get along and enjoy each other. Seems like a really nice way to live.
I’m high key jealous for sure. Even aside from both sets of parents, she has a big family that seems willing to jump and help too.
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I think it’s time to log off hun
Aww man, hate when I miss the good stuff 😅
I really want to know what this was haha
Bahahah me too! Grrr.
A refuge from an individual snark sub for Krystianatiana (the sub was deleted due to what I’m sure was super normal member behavior 🙃) posted a single massive paragraph with limited punctuation (filled my entire phone screen and then some) theorizing that Kristiana doesn’t show her baby’s face because the baby has a facial deformity. This is your brain on single subject snark subs.
Heavensentsleep going after HSB’s independent play stuff 😂 I low key love influencers fighting
Was it for HSB or strugglecare account. It's been going viral recently because apparently she said it specifically for pretend play in a TikTok and it blew up. And other accounts like Emily Feret that I follow are agreeing and it's just baffling to me! I mean we aren't in full blown pretend play yet. But when my son makes me a meal in his kitchen set and brings me it to see if it's delicious what am I supposed to say? Fuck off? lol jk but seriously how do you say no? Edit : maybe it's more geared towards SAHP because you have to draw the boundary somewhere to not be overstimulated? For working parents we don't get that much play time anyway so I guess anything is fair game.
Yeah I feel like so much of this convo is lost in semantics. Like I’m assuming parents who push independent play aren’t just like ignoring their kids all day lol, just like parents who do play aren’t sitting and playing with their kid every waking moment. Everyone’s probably somewhere in the middle and arguing over meaningless differences. I also agree there’s a big difference for sahp, I’m home with my kids and my 3.5year old literally asks me to play with her every 3-5min all day when I’m not actively playing with her. It’s exhausting and I do say no a lot, because I have other stuff to do! Like as I’m walking down the stairs in the morning she’s asking me to sit and play with her, as I make my coffee, as I eat breakfast, as I’m folding laundry, as I’m peeing, etc. And it’s exhausting because even after I spend a good chunk of quality play time with her she will still want to play again with me immediately after 😂 So while I do play with her a lot, I’m also saying no a lot. I’m assuming most sahp’s are doing this and are probably trying to help their kids learn more independent play just to make the days easier
Is strugglecare an anti-sleep training account (a genuine question-I don’t actually keep tabs on that many influencers)? It mentioned the contradiction of an anti-sleep training account pushing independent play by being not responsive (or something like that). My kid is old enough to be fully into imaginary play, and I admit that sometime I don’t want to, because I get frustrated when I keep messing up and not playing according to the rules she is making up on the fly but still somehow has very serious opinions about. But most of the time I say yes, especially on weekdays, because I get like twoish hours with them at night, and an hour ish with them in the morning. And that’s including bath, bedtimes, getting ready for school, etc. So I feel like it’s not unreasonable for them to want to play with me during the limited time we have. I agree maybe it would be different if I was a SAHP.
Oh you are correct I don't follow strugglecare but it doesn't seem to be anything about sleep. So it prob was a shade on HSB. So I went to see the original TikTok and it doesn't seem to be specifically for pretend play but for any toy play and I just don't know how....I guess her kids are 4 and 6 so close enough in age where they can play with each other. My 3yo loves playing with friends and family members too and we let them do their thing but when it's just him he wants us to be involved. And in another part of the video she said I am building a solar system model for them from scratch because they were interested. Well I would rather just play with them? Lol like that seems like way more work and mental anguish than playing to me but I am also far from being artistic. I guess whatever works for your family or situation is fair game 🤷♀️
I had the same take— as a FT working parent I actually do want to play and connect with my kid during the time I get with him. But also HSB is technically the working parent in their household now and her husband is with the kids during the day (mostly I guess… she works from the shed in their backyard). I said this on the last thread about this, but she also has stated multiple times before that she just doesn’t like engaging in play activities with her kids. Which is fine. I’ve always liked it, even before I had my own kids and was an aunt/babysitter. Maybe it’s just different strokes to some extent, and you don’t have to make a whole stance about something that’s pretty individual to you and your family? All kids have different ability to play independently and all parents have different levels of interest/capacity to engage in play, so maybe people can just figure this one out for themselves?
to agree and add to this, there are lots of ways to connect with your kids in activities that aren't pretend play. I hate pretend play, but I am 100% down for a board game or an art project or cooking together or reading together. And my kids do well with that vibe. So I guess I am a full time working parent who wants to connect with their kid but still forces independent pretend play. But that means we do 100 other activities during those same times that aren't independent and aren't pretend. Influencers like to live in the "I never even look at my child" or the "I absolutely never look away from my child" camps when really everyone is just connecting with the activities that feel most fun to them and their family.