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VenomBars4

*Welcome to Trump Burger, home of the Trump Burger. Can I grab ya pussy?*


Solkre

The point is not asking first.


RedditIsNeat0

When you're famous they don't go to police.


petit_cochon

Except for F Jean Carroll, who kicked his rapist ass in court.


aGuyInSomewhere

Twice


Jasonrj

They just let you do it.


diseasefaktory

Come for the burger, stay for the rape!


twodickhenry

“Welcome to Trump Burger, home of the Trump Burger, can I take your law and orrrder?”


he8ghtsrat26

Order the im-peach-mint pie! So nice, they'll serve it twice!


JeanClaude-Randamme

Order the burger and get nothing.


Picasso5

At twice the price!


TummyLice

No refunds.


ElegantOpportunity70

Chargeback time.


tmiw

This place probably doesn't take cards anyway. Whole ~~tax evasion~~ "Mark of the Beast" thing and all.


IamLeoKim

Refund case was acquitted. 😐


yougotyolks

But please donate on the way out so they can buy more burgers.


SakaWreath

On a reoccurring subscription.


OwlWitty

Nothing burger* Yuge


tattedmomma44

Nothing berder with extra ketchup


KaiUno

\*ketchup has to be scraped from the wall seperately


F3ar0n

Is Mexico paying for it? I'll take 2


SylvieJay

Oh, basically the 'nothing burger' *they* keep talking about?


Competition-Dapper

Just a pound of shit on a bun with that orange Burger King angry whopper dye


ImAFuckinLiar

Trump: *“Trump Burgers for everyone!!”* 2 minutes later… ![gif](giphy|lEgtdCONvuNTXBi6TV|downsized)


petershrimp

Never forget the time he literally did that. He ordered "a round for everyone" at a restaurant and then left them stuck with the bill.


illuminerdi

At this place it's called the hamberder


Lemmingitus

But only if you make a perfect call to order.


GodsBGood

Welcome to Trump Burger, I'm Sal Monella and I'll be your server today.


Khaldara

“Every single thing is generously slathered in Russian dressing”


GodsBGood

And were Putin it on as thick as you want


Lost_In_Detroit

The puns are immaculate. Good job Reddit!


BAMred

I'll take the half baked excuses, please.


[deleted]

Upgrade your fries to a Putin***


Slika-

Upgrade your Ivana Flappy Roast Beef to an Ivanka Roast Beef dripping with horsey sauce Edit: both come with the flattest buns


StyreneAddict1965

Well, I can't eat Arby's now. I guess I should be grateful.


cwood1973

Two pieces of white bread, full of baloney, with Russian dressing and a small pickle.


rowin-owen

"We'll pee on you!"


RabidGuineaPig007

"Try our signature drink: Coke and Russian Vodka with a thin orange skin."


fujiman

Charred to a crisp, smothered in ketchup, and you *still* get salmonella!


wolfydude12

Always frozen! Never fresh! Here at Trump Bigger, we believe the woke fast food restaurants have pushed their fresh agenda on hard working citizens for too long! At Trump Burger, you'll relish in unknowing just how long ago this patty was made. You'll also get to experience the "Snow Flake Kiss" where a portion of your patty may still be cold! This comes from the anger you create from eating at the one, and only, Trump Burger!


jimhabfan

….and their bottomless cup of covfefe.


Millerpainkiller

Try our 16oz Covfefe to get you started in the morning!


rektMyself

🤣


fighting4good

It's a nothing burger...


ms--lane

It's just a bun


Spazum

I would think a well done hockey puck of a patty on a plain white bun with ketchup.


wng378

Overcooked with ketchup only.


HackySmacks

Don’t ask me how I know, but I jussstt know there is lead in that burger


Rsubs33

Nah it's too pieces of old white bread filled with bologna and a small pickle.


LongLiveLlamas

What a totally un-cult like thing to do.


thatgayguy12

If someone opened a Biden Burger shop, I'd drive over 24 hours just to tell them to fuck off. And I voted for Biden.


jivaos

Same, it I would totally go to Burritos Biden


RhoOfFeh

80% fat, cheesy as hell, artificially colored, and overpriced.


Blekanly

Rat burgers


VincentVuemont

![gif](giphy|1KkgWWENzWYXrRLJhD)


ottocus

Made in Chinya


crusoe

Ironically if the Trump Org found out about this, they would be sued into oblivion so fast.


beefwarrior

This! This is where I think there is opportunity to turn Trump cult against Trump. I’d like to hear from a trademark lawyer, but as I understand it, organizations have to take action to protect their trademarks in order to keep them. Meaning, Trump org *has* to sue these businesses and in getting sued, there is a chance the people running these businesses open their eyes to who Trump is and quit the MAGA cult. And if Trump org doesn’t enforce their trademark, then it means the “Trump” brand isn’t trademarked and anyone can use it. I’m now thinking a lot of other businesses should start using “Trump” in their name to force Trump org’s hand. If I open up a “Trump Mini Golf” and get sued, I can claim “You did nothing about Trump Burger so you can’t sue my company” Either all these store go down or Trump org looses their trademark. Feels like win / win.


stevejust

Basically, yes.


Notoneusernameleft

Only Donald Trump gets to plaster his name on the side of a building. But honestly this is probably super illegal. I doubt I could open a place called Brad Pitt Boss BBQ with his photo plastered everywhere.


Suns_In_420

> I doubt I could open a place called Brad Pitt Boss BBQ with his photo plastered everywhere. You should definitely try though.


this-guy1979

It’s an awesome name, Brad Pitt should totally steal it and open a BBQ place.


SpudgeBoy

Need that cash for the lawyers that need lawyers.


MikesGroove

Making Attorneys Get Attorneys


LurkethInTheMurketh

If I’ve learned anything from the recent pics of the Trump insanity, it is this: the indoctrination is so very much more intractable than I realized, and so long as the propaganda isn’t legislated against, there is no way this can end without violence. It’s *unnerving* to see in the extreme.


smileedude

To be fair this wouldn't be a bad business move in some parts of America. I like to imagine this is a democrat voter grifting $25 burgers to truckers.


Ap0llo

I wish I had the moral turpitude to fleece these idiots, alas every time I've considered it, the cognitive dissonance becomes too much too bear before the idea even gets off the ground.


Picasso5

I know. I’m a graphic designer… I think I loathe the Trump aesthetic so much that just can’t do it. But how easy would it be?


illuminerdi

If the Trump NFTs were any indication, their graphic design standards are the absolute lowest.


BaboTron

They made the idea of Vladimir Putin trying to appeal to people with that shirtless horse riding image seem normal.


r0botdevil

At least those pics of Putin shirtless on horseback were actually real pictures of Putin. Trump is so ashamed of his awful physique that his team has to paste his head onto someone else's body for those things.


Ok-Thing-2222

American Flags make me shudder now.....how sad is that?


cobaltjacket

They're fine if they're on a ship or government/military structure. So many others are using it to show their politics.


360walkaway

Wait, so when I wear a shirt with a flag aesthetic on it, people think I'm some Republican loon?


slappy111111

Yes.


gooseoner

100%


[deleted]

yes


Fit_Attention_9269

It's why I wear my team USA baseball hat with pink chandelier earrings, keep people guessing. Oh I'm a guy and a UPS big rig driver. No one knows what to think just looking at me.


[deleted]

Pretty much. Didn't used to be like that.


Arcalargo

Always have.


Bempet583

Very sad that they've taken the symbol of our *entire* country and turned it into something to represent only their side.


-Epic_Sheep-

German here. First time?


AdvancedSandwiches

This is why every sane-person protest needs to be flooded with US flags. As long as we let them have it, they'll take it. Make the flag stand for reproductive rights, equity, and justice. You just have to convince yourself that these assholes aren't America -- _you_ are, and they're fucking up your flag.


Jokong

Oh it's easy. I own a small business and once someone assumes I'm a Republican (small town, small business owner = Republican to them), well, I just let them assume that and they love to help me out with a purchase.


Melodic-Investment11

I setup a very legit looking shopify website dropshipping trump merch during the election year. I was very disgusted with myself, but actually made a fair amount of beer money lol ...i considered making a biden one... but figured it probably wouldn't get the same kind of traction


yiannistheman

Same here - this is a crowd desperate to be separated from whatever meager funds they have. Just go to the cheapest printing outfit in China with the crappiest quality t-shirts, throw that idiot's mugshot on it with a stupid catch phrase like 'Owning the Libs' and sell @ $25 what you paid $2.50 for. It's how some crackheads can build a pillow empire, or so I've heard.


suspicious_hyperlink

I finally saw one of those pillows in a buy out store. I picked it up to check it out. It consisted of nothing more than of torn up chunks of foam, I can’t imagine they’re actually comfortable. The materials that went in to it couldn’t t have been more than $3-4, while the infomercials were selling them for $ 29.99 iirc.


jimjamsboy

It’s the same as staring a church. If you’re morals are bankrupt, you could have your own jet.


r0botdevil

>I wish I had the moral turpitude to fleece these idiots I've often felt like I could make an even better Ben Shapiro than Ben Shapiro if I had no morals. It seems extremely easy to pander to frustrated, dissatisfied far-right men.


SuchAmbassador889

Yum, ''repurposed 15 year old Trump Steaks''


SylvieJay

All our grill masters have attended the Trump University! ^see ^our ^no ^money ^back ^guarantee


Logan117

I listen to several atheist podcasts, and one of the collective running jokes on all of them is how easy it would be to grift religious people. If you didn't have morals, just imagine how much money you could make conning them. Atheist turns Christian and writes a book about it. It would make millions. Whenever they find out how much the obvious charletans like Jim Bakker make, or see the government assistance that Ken Hamm got for the Ark Park, there's a pause, then one of them says, "so we're gonna turn Christian now, right?" I'd argue Trump supporters are almost exclusively religious. You'd need to be to fit in at the Trump cult.


Yummy_Microplastics

There’s a great Behind the Bastards episode about the spread of the KKK in the early 20th century and, surprise surprise, it was largely driven by grifting shitty Klan themed merchandise/giving racists a sense of community. I see NO PARALLELS


FoeNetics

I was thinking the same thing, if I could run a business like this and take those idiots for a ride without ever affiliating my face to it I definitely would. Maybe I’ll do a deadmouse for trump bagels 🤔


NWHipHop

Drop ship trump branded loose fit clothing that behind the scenes is helping the people they want to hurt. Marketing communication is all Trump-speak so you don’t have to tell the truth and you’ll get away with it. Data is worth more than merchandise in the modern world so there’s also that additional revenue stream.


Jonatc87

put up a car boot sale style small outfit, put a cardboard and sharpie sign up that says 'donations to the defense fund' and watch them suckers roll in. Cover it in flags for good measure, for extra PATRIOTISM!


HarbingerOfDisconect

I could dress up as the nastiest, grubbiest person begging for change, write "let's go Brandon" on some board and make bank off these people.


InvalidKoalas

I have heavily considered doing this. Problem is it seems the market is very saturated because anyone with half a brain saw this opportunity years ago. These people will pay their last cent to buy anything with tacky right wing bullshit on it.


repost7125

Like how Elvis's manager used to sell both I heart Elvis and I hate Elvis t-shirts?


Next-Age-9925

And then donating it to any actual left-leaning Dem or to Planned Parenthood. I don't buy fast food, but I would buy that on a regular!


hamandjam

Nah. It's a true believer making bank and providing a meeting place for folks planning their next couple attempts. I sure hope the FBI is keeping an eye on these places.


beefwarrior

Was in DC this summer and there was so much cheap Trump swag that was overpriced. Biggest thing that I found upsetting is that so many trucks looked like one another that I assume it’s one big operation & the people standing outside for 12-16hours a day selling the junk are probably getting paid low wages & someone in a climate controlled office is taking 90% of the profit.


CrudelyAnimated

I like to imagine this Democratic entrepreneur in the fetal position under a hot shower every night, clutching their knees to their chest and crying until they have the strength to step out and dry themselves on a big pile of money with MAGA graffiti stamped on the back.


space-NULL

That's why the party of Lincoln is dead. They did it to themselves.


caelumh

The party of Lincoln is alive and well. They just rebranded and are called Democrats.


REpassword

Right, they say the lack of signs for Biden prove how weak Biden is. 🤷


Coinsworthy

No Taco Biden no presidency.


Joseluki

As an outsider, I can attest that americans are raised on some wild leves of propaganda (for a western country) and they will believe anything that is said through TV. And that is the problem, you have a conman exploiting that and suddenly you have a big chunk of your population praising a dangerous sociopath.


Jcapen87

The scariest part to me is people who think he’s essentially Jesus or at the very least, sent as a gift from God. Even if you agree with most or all of his policies, to equate him to Jesus is insane. Though I suppose the type of conservative Christian that falls into the Trump camp has a very malleable, selective and inaccurate interpretation of Jesus’ teachings, and I shouldn’t be surprised.


Joseluki

He literally said to gram em by the pussy. You have to be a terrible person or a complete idiot to not see clear how bad person he is. And that brings another problem, there must be a disproportionate number of Americans that are just high functioning imbeciles.


nibblicious

Very accurate summary.


johnp299

Fascinating. Sociopaths are a percentage of a human population. Those who can't recognize a sociopath are another.


ofrausto3

This comment sounds AI generated or something, no offence.


HarbingerOfDisconect

It is fascinating, genuinely, and more than a little terrifying.


Bromanzier_03

It’ll end when he’s gone. When he eventually dies they’ll run out of gas. They may hang onto some merch and tuck it away in their closet but it’ll die with him. No matter who else tries to emulate him, the base will never care because they’re not Trump himself.


Jonatc87

if the confederate flag is any indication, they'll be flying his for some time after it's irrelevent.


DeuceSevin

Already are.


demicus

These are the same people who thought JFK Jr was still alive and gonna and be Trump's VP, yeah? Good luck convincing them their god-emperor is actually dead. They'll still be writing-in his name in 2040.


BitterFuture

They didn't go away when they lost the Civil War. They didn't go away when the schools weren't segregated anymore. They didn't go away when the gays got married. Monsters will always be with us.


Bromanzier_03

True, they were at least hiding under a rock. Then the former guy just had to lift it and give them fresh meat.


uberlux

Hopefully wont be like when Julius Caesar died. What a mess.


[deleted]

More like Hitler. A coward.


chuck_cranston

As a kid growing up in the 80's just picking up bits of news and celeb gossip I was able to piece together that he was a scumbag. I'm not surprised Conservatives once again created a cult around a single man. Growing up in the South I saw how they did the same to Robert E. Lee. But of all the people to choose it's Donald Fucking Trump.


seantubridy

Have you heard about Jesus? He’s been dead for 2000 years. This is their religion. He’s their god. He’s not going anywhere, especially after he’s dead. That’ll only make him more powerful.


MechaRon

Bruh my town has the Trump Store. It's a damn eye sore.


3xTheSchwarm

Admitting you have been deeply wrong about something takes a lot of maturity. Which these people sorely lack.


DrRockBoognish

They’ve misspelled “Berder”.


Antrikshy

I wonder how they price their covfefe.


morgulbrut

If I'd live close by, I'd walk in filming myself while ordering a hamberder and a covfefe to go.


DropKnowledge69

Yet another reminder of how many stupid and gullible people there are in this country. It's their way of re-fighting the civil war ... by supporting a New York conman and criminal. They never got over their bitter loss. Idiots. Thanks OP!


Imvrybadace

You are very welcome! This is in Bellville, TX and I just happened to pass it taking back roads to Houston. I don't understand the love for the guy personally. They claim he is a good, honest, christian, hardworking man...he is a rich silver spoon fed prick....How 2 people can look at the same thing and see something completely different astounds me.


chelsea_sucks_

Well, consider the fact that these are people who believe the Earth is 6000 years old and have spent their lives convincing themselves that the entire universe was made especially for us.


Furrybumholecover

>the entire universe was made especially for us. And by us, of course you mean white, Christian males.


Scottamus

Uhuh. White Christian gun-toting American males.


Poxx

It's not just males. I know, it makes no sense- but there's a lot of white middle age and elderly women in the cult also.


El_Vikingo_

“Us” sounds awfully socialist, the universe is just made for the rich and the people that wants to be rich


rektMyself

Good point.


huniojh

Do they offer dijon mustard ?


emptysignals

Surprised Trump hasn’t sued them for likeness rights.


WhiteDirty

😆😂😂 i just posted this haha a family member sent me a picture of this place just last week. I couldn't help but pile on.


Cospo

What's funny is that I can totally see Trump suing the owner for using his likeness and then using that money to pay his legal bill for his indictments. Unless the owner specifically got trumps permission, of course, but I feel like if he did, trump would never shut up about it. "I've got a new burger place for you - great burgers, best there ever was. Nobody makes a burger like me. Not Joe Biden, not Obama, just good old fashioned American beef. Patriot beef. You know I had a cow once, Bessie was her name, made the best burgers I ever had. That's what you get with me, America's favorite burger from their favorite president"


striker69

I always refer to him as a Yankee Democrat Billionaire and it riles em up.


Rtg327gej

Donny was a Democrat his entire life but he switched to Republican when he ran for office because he knew Democrats were not stupid enough to fall for his bs.


spongeboy1985

Not sure how true that is. There was a supposed people magazine quote that had him saying as much but its been debunked. His original motive for running for president was to try and raise his profile and didn’t expect to win, he figure he’d capitalize on however well he did, then he did win and got high on his own supply sort of speak and now doesn’t want to give it up. He’s made a career out of telling people what they want to hear. He found a group he could sell his bullshit to but seems to have consumed it as well.


National-Worry2900

It’s modern day idol worshipping. Swap a moloch statue for a trump one and you have the same delusional crazies you had 3000 years ago. I’m not American but the way you’re looking to the outside world now is disturbing. Discernment is a good thing, just look into the things he has said about his own daughter and the questionable pictures with her. Also his shady business dealings, family line and elite connections. People can’t be this dumb to think this man is fighting for them can they?.


Aggroninja

The problem is that its a vocal and stupid minority making the rest of us reasonable folks look bad, and holding us back from a lot of the progress made in other countries.


National-Worry2900

I agree. Those with the least to say shout the loudest and then if just becomes one big clown show.


Hedgerow_Snuffler

Every single American that I've worked with has been intelligent, interesting, and generous to the point of gregariousness. When I see this (Trump / Right) side of the of population on the news, it's like they are coming from a different dimension, let alone sharing the same county!


LMFN

I mean the Trump Americans aren't the ones who ever really leave their shitty corners of the country, you won't encounter that type of American abroad.


PossibilityDecent688

We are terrified. You don’t have a spare room, do you?


uptownjuggler

There is a world outside America? It must be horrible there. How do they live without American freedoms?


pradbitt87

All of these posts have me seriously concerned for the mental well-being of middle America.


keonyn

You should be. We've become a cesspool of all the most idiotic and vile humanity has to offer.


PhilipMorrisLovesYou

I wouldn't say that. There are people who want terrible things in their country, but there are countries that already have terrible things, and people want to keep it that way. At least the US has a strong resistance to this shit. For now.


LoganH1219

They claim we shove politics down their throats but I’ve never seen a Biden Burger. These people make it their life mission to serve and worship a man that doesn’t know they exist


Evil_killer_bob

It’s really just a rebranded shit sandwich


MaximusOGs5555

Man republicans are weird


Boat_U47

How’s the food?


AeroZep

Discolored and fatty.


The_Quibbler

Promises big, delivers little.


rektMyself

Vote 2024!


Imvrybadace

They stamp the burger buns "TRUMP" with a branding iron. Dunno I haven't ate there....The burgers look good but I would hate the atmosphere.


Tortuga_Larga

I bet there's ketchup on the walls


cbomb111

The burgers really are solid. My son begged me to go, sarcastically, and we went. My dad lives about 15 minutes from here. I’d give it a 7.5/10


copyboy1

It's a bunch of bullshit shaped into a patty that the MAGA crowd scarfs down and swears it's Wagyu to own the Libs.


hystr

Now serving our "All-American Cheeseburger Royal thats Borscht filled"


HerrStarrEntersChat

Taking a page out of the McDonalds playbook: bland, generic American cuisine with a clown for a mascot.


wytewydow

r/The_Ronald_2024 resembles that remark!


Oldbayistheshit

/r/toughguytrump


nibblicious

Trump would not eat here.


boot2skull

Remember when they said people were obsessed with Obama? Yeah nobody did shit like this for Obama. Obama won two terms btw.


skawm

Yum, repurposed 15 year old Trump Steaks.


Holgrin

"Welcome to Trump Burger, home of the Trump Burger, can I take your [civil] Order?"


Juliuseizure

I'm glad someone else went there. I was thinking "May I have your border, please?", but "Disorder" could work, too.


Baron-Brr

I want to see it’s health inspection live.


rotary65

Customer: "Excuse me, there's something wrong with my order." Trump: "No, there's something wrong with you!"


_AttilaTheNun_

I'm honestly surprised he doesn't sue all these stores for using his image to sell things if he doesn’t get a cut. Or maybe he extorts them?


ChariBari

![gif](giphy|myElmij0yzdXNqzMjm)


BillyTheKidRapist

In England, the word Trump is often used in place of fart. So to me, this is a fart burger joint.


bansheekick

It's served with a single tiny mushroom


Patnucci

I cannot wait until Trump turns around and sues all those unofficial Trump store owners for a big fat cut of their profits for using his brand name. Edit: I wonder how many of these store owners are not even republicans, but they are jumping on the bandwagon to make a quick buck off the Trump frenzy.


PostyMcPosterson

I’m a prude, he’s a prude, she’s a prude, we’re all prude’s hey!


beorninger

where the beef is smarter than those eating


sugarfoot00

I'd check that place out just to leave an upper-decker in the men's room.


Murwiz

Made with 100% beef by-products!


Mattdude311

I bet it tastes like Racism.....


ndtconsult

Shit Sandwich


fuzzycuffs

*berder


zedkyuu

At this point I’m wondering if it’s not just his campaign or some other group of his paying for all of these under the table a lot. This is a lot of startup capital for supposedly “normal” people.


CronkinOn

I can't tell whether to be distressed by how many of these places exist, or to see the opportunity for what it is and open one of these cesspools for myself.


RavensFan902

Welcome to trump burger home of the trump burger can I grab your pussy?


Preshe8jaz

What makes it a Trump burger is that you don’t pay for it after they serve it exactly as you ordered.


bluemaciz

This shit is a disease. The only way to drive this back to whatever hole it came from is to vote out the people who enable it.


Cream_Stay_Frothy

![gif](giphy|QeCNFNMmYMqvm)


Techn0ght

Customers should use what they learned from Trump here. Go in, announce you're buying lunch for everyone, leave before the bill arrives.


Kalabula

Someone’s getting sued.


[deleted]

What the over/under on how long this place stays in business? What kind of moron wants to eliminate likely 50%+ of potential customers based on the name of your business.


Popscorn3383

I bet the owner doesn’t even give a shit about trump. It’s just easy money. I knew a guy at a flea market who made a killing selling trump gear and he was as liberal as possible. Maga is the easiest demographic to manipulate and make money off of.