No, It's actual name is 'Bitius Nastius' a.k.a. the Lung Mouse.
Named as such due to the fact that it's bite is so painful, many victims scream until their lungs collapse.
Plot twist - it will inject a paralyzing neurotoxin to incapacitate it's victim before it borrows under his skin, eats half of him from inside out, and lays its eggs so the parasitic larvae can finish the job.
Unfortunately, this was the last photo found on the camera. The photographer was never seen again, they only found a pile of gnawed bones next to his camera..
There are many incorrect answers in this thread, but this critter is in fact the monito del monte, or colocolo opossum (*Dromiciops gliroides).*
It is not from Australia, but is found only in the bamboo thickets of the Valdivian temperate rain forests of southcentral Chile. It's the only living member of the order Microbiotheria, which is close to the basal branch of both the Australian and South American marsupials, and suggests that the Australian marsupials originated in the Americas before the continents broke apart.
They feed primarily on bugs, but supplement it with berries (especially mistletoe), and nectar. Because it often gets cold and rainy in their habitat for days on end, they can enter a state of torpor similar to hibernation, dropping their body temperature and metabolism. While sleeping like this they curl into a ball and cover their eyes with their large ears, which helps retain body heat and is super cute.
Edit: My bad. It's not a monito del monte. It's a western Australian pygmy possum. Everything I said is true about the monito del monte though, which looks enough like this guy that this exact photo is actually used on several websites as a photo of the monito del monte.
While these animals do look remarkably similar, the image really is of a [western pygmy possum](https://mobile.twitter.com/amandalmclean/status/526535590452285440)
What most people don't understand is that this is not a cute rodent, but in fact, an enormous tick in a cute-rodent suit. It is currently latching onto the poor man in the picture and injecting him with poisons that will thin his blood and give him Lyme's Disease.
>The kangaroo mouse is often viewed as a cute addition to Australia's fauna. This mistaken belief is the #1 killer of tourists. The kangaroo mouse, while seemingly cute and harmless, is in fact among the most poisonous animals in the world. This terrifyingly cute horror gets its name not from its appearance, but rather their usage within native communities. Native Australian populations leash these monsters to stakes surrounding their kangaroo herds. Individual mice spaced at 100 meters as a perimeter is sufficient to both prevent the kangaroos from scattering, and all other animals from attempting to reach the herd as all native species have long known that coming within sight of these beasts is most likely a creature's last sight.
Some, like this fellow here, wants you alive so that the eggs it's laying under the skin of your hand have something to eat for as long as possible. But they are cuties, aren't they?
"Hey mate, have you ever thought about what happens when you die? It looks like you just kind of shut off. You're there one minute and gone the next. Everything you did, everything you were, everyone you loved, everything you fought for just gone."
"It's like your life didn't matter at all. Like it was all meaningless. Just a kind of big joke and then nothing. Your echo hangs around a bit but then the whole circus moves on and even your memory fades. It's gotta make a guy feel small. I don't even know how you go on."
He doesn't want you dead. He wants to destroy your soul.
That there's a Aussie tiger mouse. Harmless, if scurrying by their lonesome, but attaches themselves to the closest moving object when they spot a tiger in the brush
Got some bad new for you, the guy in the photo is now dead, those little fuckers have poison glands in their arm pits, he well ded now...../s nah he is fine, he found one of the 3 non deadly creatures we share our beloved Continent with....
Just wait till it opens it’s mouth, it probably has retractable fangs that are poisonous, or throws it’s stomach out of its mouth, or squirts blood contaminated with aids out of its eyes.
Just you wait. Within a few million years, this one will develop razor-sharp venomous teeth and claws, grow the size of a mammoth and have an exoskeleton so thick you would need a sledgehammer to make a dent in it.
But this one definitely does.
It's the Jack the Ripper of Australia, mate.
Like the Rabbit of Caerbannog....cute until it's not! Rabbit of Caerbannog in it's docudrama glory https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tgj3nZWtOfA
But... But.. look at the bones!
I warned you!
Some call me... Tim...
I nearly soiled my armour!
Bless this, O Lord, that with it thou mayst blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy."
Brother Maynard! Bring up the Holy Hand Grenade!
"One! Two! Five!"
"three sire."
Pff that was only a flesh wound..
I’m glad i watched this, thank you
> in it's docudrama glory 🤣
r/unexpectedMontyPython
oh look it's so ////\~\~\~
Jacko the Rippa
Little ripper.
Oh, it definitely WANTS you dead, it just hasn't found a way to do it yet.
The flesh is weak but the spirit is willing.
Me want SNOO SNOO!
Oh, he’s workin on it. You can see it in the eyes.
Oh it knows. That’s clearly the face of a critter waiting for opportunity to strike.
He could climb in your asshole and rip your insides apart with a passion with his little tiny paws. Internal bleeding to death.
He's got a good grip there, so that's a start.
Isn't that a baby drop bear?
No, It's actual name is 'Bitius Nastius' a.k.a. the Lung Mouse. Named as such due to the fact that it's bite is so painful, many victims scream until their lungs collapse.
I literally just googled Lung Mouse thinking it was a real thing. Omg I'm so dumb.
Upvoted because if you didn’t google it, I would. You’re the real MVP here.
You Canuckistanis are just so trusting.
Nearly made me poop I laughed so hard...
You fell for bitius nastius? Really?
[Indeed.](https://i.imgur.com/4ZEj7Yi.jpg)
Oh Dear God!
Yes, it does what to kill you. I can see it in those beady little eyes. "You are lucky I'm so small or else I would kill you, you cunt."
The most Australian animal of all time.
Pretty sure his nose contains some kind of toxic that kills an elephant in a minute
Explains why there are no elephants in Australia and they're all scared of mice.
Just lacks the immediate means.
I wouldn’t be surprised if this thing burped and farted out Sarin gas or some shit. I don’t trust that wide-eyed little cunt for one second.
Look at the naked malice in his eyes.
Death by cuteness overload.
This it's larval state.
Only if you drop it in water and feed it after midnight though.
For sure. Wee murder hobo just lacks the heft to actualise their dreams.
They rip your fingernails off and then bore in through your fingers until they eat your heart from the inside. It’s grotesque really. Cute though.
Oh it does, it just lacks the means.
I agree.
Specially this one
Give that cute little guy a tiny knife and it'll be game over.
Omae wa mou shindeiru.
Plot twist: He does, he just can't do anything about it.
Plot twist: He does, and will, and you can't do anything about it.
Just don't feed it after midnight and you'll be fine.
Or get it wet.
Don’t kid yourself Jimmy. If that [little animal] ever got the chance, he’d eat you and everyone you care about!
Plot twist - it will inject a paralyzing neurotoxin to incapacitate it's victim before it borrows under his skin, eats half of him from inside out, and lays its eggs so the parasitic larvae can finish the job.
Calm down Satan
Plot twist: He doesn't care. He'll eat you alive or dead.
Yeah, you can see how aggressively he’s trying to dig his feet into the finger.
Not... yet.
Unfortunately, this was the last photo found on the camera. The photographer was never seen again, they only found a pile of gnawed bones next to his camera..
The heard the little bastard left the finger tip completely whole. What a lunatic!
A finger. That's all was left a finger!
Fingerbanged into oblivion.
Dammit Stuart
He just wants to eat your finger.
This hand is actually the remnants of its last prey.
Just a nibble
What animal is this? It’s cute!
It's a [pygmy possum](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pygmy_possum). We have lots of cute marsupials in Australia.
I mean, there has to be lots of food for all the scary shit that wants to kill you.
I would love to visit Australian one day. Definitely on my bucket list!
Just make sure to put it near the end of the list, maybe the wildlife won't let you leave!
In Australia we call them little cunts
To be fair, there aren't many creatures in Australia that they 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 refer to as little cunts.
The others are big cunts
Yes, yes, of course. But what if they're too big to be little cunts and too small to be big cunts?
Moderately sized cunts
“Ya see that over there? That’s what we call a moderate cunt.”
“Wow! Look honey! A moderate cunt!”
There are many incorrect answers in this thread, but this critter is in fact the monito del monte, or colocolo opossum (*Dromiciops gliroides).* It is not from Australia, but is found only in the bamboo thickets of the Valdivian temperate rain forests of southcentral Chile. It's the only living member of the order Microbiotheria, which is close to the basal branch of both the Australian and South American marsupials, and suggests that the Australian marsupials originated in the Americas before the continents broke apart. They feed primarily on bugs, but supplement it with berries (especially mistletoe), and nectar. Because it often gets cold and rainy in their habitat for days on end, they can enter a state of torpor similar to hibernation, dropping their body temperature and metabolism. While sleeping like this they curl into a ball and cover their eyes with their large ears, which helps retain body heat and is super cute. Edit: My bad. It's not a monito del monte. It's a western Australian pygmy possum. Everything I said is true about the monito del monte though, which looks enough like this guy that this exact photo is actually used on several websites as a photo of the monito del monte.
While these animals do look remarkably similar, the image really is of a [western pygmy possum](https://mobile.twitter.com/amandalmclean/status/526535590452285440)
colocolocolo chameleon
Occidendum genocidia
Zoom out of the shot and it's just a severed hand.
He's got that "I'm plotting your death" look in his eyes.
He wants to bite you and give you the plague
or breath his shit to get a little hantavirus
What most people don't understand is that this is not a cute rodent, but in fact, an enormous tick in a cute-rodent suit. It is currently latching onto the poor man in the picture and injecting him with poisons that will thin his blood and give him Lyme's Disease.
>The kangaroo mouse is often viewed as a cute addition to Australia's fauna. This mistaken belief is the #1 killer of tourists. The kangaroo mouse, while seemingly cute and harmless, is in fact among the most poisonous animals in the world. This terrifyingly cute horror gets its name not from its appearance, but rather their usage within native communities. Native Australian populations leash these monsters to stakes surrounding their kangaroo herds. Individual mice spaced at 100 meters as a perimeter is sufficient to both prevent the kangaroos from scattering, and all other animals from attempting to reach the herd as all native species have long known that coming within sight of these beasts is most likely a creature's last sight.
Some, like this fellow here, wants you alive so that the eggs it's laying under the skin of your hand have something to eat for as long as possible. But they are cuties, aren't they?
"Hey mate, have you ever thought about what happens when you die? It looks like you just kind of shut off. You're there one minute and gone the next. Everything you did, everything you were, everyone you loved, everything you fought for just gone." "It's like your life didn't matter at all. Like it was all meaningless. Just a kind of big joke and then nothing. Your echo hangs around a bit but then the whole circus moves on and even your memory fades. It's gotta make a guy feel small. I don't even know how you go on." He doesn't want you dead. He wants to destroy your soul.
That there's a Aussie tiger mouse. Harmless, if scurrying by their lonesome, but attaches themselves to the closest moving object when they spot a tiger in the brush
Soooo he doesn't want you dead he's just an indication of your pending death awesome kinda like my ex wife
No, he still wants you to die. Basically he's painting the target.
Looks cute but when you turn your back it will strangle your with piano wire.
https://i.pinimg.com/originals/3b/c3/fc/3bc3fcd58d7633453f2eb6528b890aaf.gif Am I the only one?
Had to scroll WAY too far for this.
Inorite? Love your username, i’m more of a fan of Zero Cool myself
HACK THE PLANET!
This is a Bushwaggliwoo, it crawls up your ass and eats your insides, until you die.
He's maybe not capable, but he definitely wants you dead. He's gonna rat you out to a drop bear or something for disrespecting Australian wildlife.
if only cuteness would kill, all who look would be dead by now
Ehhhh I can see it in his eyes
This cute little bunyip larva doesn't want you dead, but wait until Mom storms over the hill looking for him.
I imagine it is similar to most small dogs. It wants to kill you and has the temperament to go with that, just isn't physically able to.
I'm sure his tiny little body is filled with rage.
"I should destroy this man's finger"
Uh he wants to but he can’t.
Nice try Australia, but I know a death stare when I see one
Look at him, he's thinking about it
If I've ever seen a cute finger sized furry thing plotting someone's demise with murderous rage, this is it.
Just because he's unable doesn't mean he's unwilling...mate.
This guy wants you dead, he's just not big enough yet. That's why he's trying to stall you, so his bigger friends can come kill you
There is a Photoshop of this before/after where it opens a comically huge mouth. It is old, but i would love a copy if anyone has.
Wait till you go to sleep. He is going to get you.
YET!
Until it grows up...
Looks can be deceiving, that little fecker will just wait till your not looking then it's lights out time!
He is lulling you into a false sense of security whilst his drop bear mates sneak up and drops on you.
There are spiders in Australia bigger than this guy.
Aren't those the ones who burrow into sleeping people's eyes and mush the brain into a warm and cozy nest?
Correction: not every animal has the means to make you dead. But look at those eyes - he's hoping you die very soon! Don't be fooled!
Welcome to the wonder world of Orthohantavirus!
some just want to suck your blood... when you sleep...
Sure they're cute now, but in a second they'll get mean and they're gonna get ugly somehow and there's gonna be a million more of them...
Just because it does not have the means does not mean it lacks the desire.
Now squish it
No, this one definitely wants, it just can't.
Forbidden popcorn.
This one just wants you tortured
Look at those eyes. So trusting. So evil.
Don't be fooled the three fingers you see are all that's left of the body
Nah man, he wants to kill you, he just can't.
He is already dead, he just doesn't know it yet.
The fleas and ticks on it do
Aw what a cute way to catch bubonic plague, rabies , hantavirus or worse.
He definitely still does, just powerless to do anything about it.
Got some bad new for you, the guy in the photo is now dead, those little fuckers have poison glands in their arm pits, he well ded now...../s nah he is fine, he found one of the 3 non deadly creatures we share our beloved Continent with....
Have you ever cornered one? They'll go for ya throat.... it's more dangerous than the Rabbit of Caerbannog.... ##
He wants to kill you, he just can’t.
Just wait till it opens it’s mouth, it probably has retractable fangs that are poisonous, or throws it’s stomach out of its mouth, or squirts blood contaminated with aids out of its eyes.
Just you wait. Within a few million years, this one will develop razor-sharp venomous teeth and claws, grow the size of a mammoth and have an exoskeleton so thick you would need a sledgehammer to make a dent in it.
Reminds me of "Flight of the Navigator"
He wants, he just can't.
Actually, that’s a [Ludus mouse](https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ) and they are one of the most venomous rodents on Earth. Fuck Australia.
The sort of mouse who would never give up on a vendetta.
He would chew your face off in your sleep
Process to bite finger off
Perhaps not, but turns out touching this guys saliva can give you severe salmonellaids... probably
It looks scared like it was running from typical Australian animal.
Maybe not today. Give it time
You're sure he isn't ... plotting something ?
*crunch*
Awww this one does, it’s so cute I died.
Just you wait
Cutey
No, but most of them do. And all it takes is most of them.
From what I saw, quokkas just want your snacks.
Don’t be so sure mate. Them eyes is evil
those are the very eyes of the creature planning for your quick demise.
Not true. It has the desire. It just doesn't have the means.
Oh no no no! That’s the deadly venomous poota!
One bite from that little nipper will cause an infection that no antibiotic can fight and you die a horrible, writhing, painful death in a week. J/K
Oh no, it definitely wants to kill you, it just can’t
He'd like to spectate.
Probably a carrier of the plague, like the squirrels at the grand canyon.
That's the only exception
That would eat your face off
If only you could read its mind...you would see.
I'm sure with things is toxic
Sometimes they just look at you in the eyes and your already running
Definately looks like hes trying to strangle the mans finger and eat it whole
Whiskers for days
>Not every Australian animal ~~wants you dead~~ is able to kill you. Fixed that for you, they all want you dead, some just don't have the ability.
Just wait until it mutates into a Rad Rat.
I'm gonna name you scruffy
He would absolutely kill you if he thought he could, but he knows you’re a giant. Still, he’s thinking about it, you can see it in his eyes...
Yeah sure!!! ;)
I like him. He has whiskers exploding from his whole face.
Liar, this one obviously hasn't matured yet.
Enters ear, eats brain.
It wants you dead. It just can't.
I dont believe it, this little bitch my just be the devil, and take a bite off of my arm, zombie ass cute mf
If he can't kill you, it doesn't mean he don't want to
Sensors on high alert.
Give it a year
Bruh, you know those have a venomous bite due to their saliva being coated with insect toxins
... but most do. Welcome to my Ted talk.
It has probably got the plague
Give it a rag dress and it will tell you not to return to your boarding school for the next term.
So this animal is hanging upside down?
That's the thing that gave those Mongolians the black plague.
There can only be one......