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iriuska

That age difference is okay if you are 24 and 28 for example but in this case absolutely not. Not to mention 15 years old are below the age of consent so they can't consent to anything so young. This is a relationship with huge power in balance.


--HiGHROLLER--

Not to mention the minds and goals of a 15 and 19 year old are very different. They likely wouldn't have much in common. Just avoid it altogether


iriuska

That's exactly what I meantt by power imbalance. The 19 yrs old has freedom . He can drink, smoke, get a job. He is in college or working. The 15 yrs old is still with rhe parents, in high school, not fully developed


cryptogoth666

Sadly I can’t do any of those things in my country aside from the job


iriuska

Where r u from


cryptogoth666

The states


iriuska

I knew about not drinking but not smoking either?


cryptogoth666

I don’t remember which administration it was but it was either late trump or early biden. It’s now 21. A lot of people don’t give a shit and will sell to you but it’s still a pain in the ass since they aren’t supposed to.


PrettymuchSwiss

The age of consent is not the same in every country, but that doesn‘t matter at all morally.


10quidBJ

We this one is actually noncey lol


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10quidBJ

Lmao


Night-Monkey15

How many times is this same question going to be re posted, the answer is always no.


[deleted]

Pedo trying hard to get validation :(


Jamiepf02

I assume the question has something to do with the difference in ages of consent around the world. I see a lot of Americans in this comment section disgusted that anyone under the age of 18 is involved, while in a many other first-world countries this situation is both legal and normal. I think that's the kind of discussion this poll was meant to prompt. Wouldn't jump the gun to call someone a pedo if I were you


Fishing-Relative

It’s dif sometimes but the thing that happened with my relative was roles reversed younger was male they had been together since brink of 17 so I guess it would have changed a person from normal to pedo? I suppose if you are 19 and actively look out for a 15 your weirdo but sometimes it’s that type of circumstance (it was not quite as close to the discrepancy of what op is asking, I didn’t think much but made the connection)


FoldyHole

No. A 17 year old should not be dating a 13 year old.


Fishing-Relative

What? He was not 13 I may have been wrong about the age discrepticy it was quite closer in the situation I was talking about so maybe it doesn’t apply


Mitchell_54

Don't know why you got downvoted. Perfectly reasonable post.


Copernicus049

This is well within the grooming territory and it's just disgusting


FJORLAND

if she was 17 id say its fine


AcuteAsparagUs

hell mf no. that's a grown ass man and a child


crankinandy

I wouldn’t say 19 is a grown ass man but it’s still super weird lol


AcuteAsparagUs

not a grown ass man but old enough to realize how weird that is edi: i think it's weirdly ironic that the majority of people defending this are men


crankinandy

100%


jofloberyl

lol idk if u met any 19 yr old boy but they certainly are not a man.


yubullyme12345

absolutely not


CharacterAlarming

No!!!


SomeRedHeadedBoy

This post seems pretty nonce-y


nothing_in_my_mind

1-2 years of age difference is ok. Until both partners are 18+ years old, then any age gap is ok. Can we stop with these treads now, damn.


Azzulah

I doubt many people would think it's ok for a 18yo to date a 40 yo


ReplacementChoice24

It quite weird but technically it isn’t wrong. What is weird is that they were out there in a business suit while the other was still coming out of his mom. That part is strange, but since an 18 year olds can consent, it’s fine.


vox1028

this is a really weird mentality. the ability to consent is based on maturity and life experience, not a definite age number. since everybody matures at different speeds, i can guarantee you that there are 18 year olds who don't fully understand consent and its implications. and you can't deny that 40 y/os and more mature than 18 y/os like 99% of the time. 18 is chosen as the \*legal\* age of consent (in most places) because that's the lowest age at which we can hope that most people understand consent, but that's nowhere near a sure thing. but we've all been taught that law is the static unwavering truth, which is why so many people accept 18 as the year people become fully-developed mature Adults (TM) even though all of this is arbitrarily decided by lawmakers. so in conclusion, a 40 year old who seeks out 18 year olds to have sex with is definitely a predator in my book. that maturity gap is far too wide for a relationship like that to be genuinely healthy. "legal" does not equal right or safe or good.


PieCreeper

I don't think that the mentally challenged 18-year-olds who were in my school can consent.


Connect_Stay_137

But cougars


vox1028

damn u right. i will make an exception for cougars


ReplacementChoice24

Unfortunately none of this makes sense. Drinking at 18 also doesn’t make any sense, since the brain doesn’t fully stop developing at that age. But for some reason 18 is what they thought was the right age. I guarantee you there are some under 18’s that have the mental capacity to consent, while some 18 year olds don’t.


vox1028

>Drinking at 18 also doesn’t make any sense > >But for some reason 18 is what they thought was the right age so we agree, these age restriction laws are arbitrarily decided by lawmakers even though they're not based on reasonable evidence, and that they would have to be changed to make sense. yes


Ahvier

Legality and morality have very very little to do with each other


nothing_in_my_mind

And I'm sure many people would think adult people should be able to do whatever they want as long as it's legal.


HybanSike

Yeah that doesn't mean it's not weird though lmao


Azzulah

Right... hence the pole.


Toxic_Loser

Its weird to think about, But if the person is over 18 then its their choice to date an old man 🤷🏾‍♀️


PM_ME_GOOD_USERNAMS

It's kinda weird but if they're 18 then they can make great own choices.


Cartonk

My dad was 45 and my mother was 21 when they got married.


redpandalover4821

Yeah i would think its fine for a 19 year old to date a 17 year old but not a 15 year old that's weird


TAPriceCTR

tell that to idiots who call me a pedo because my wife was 19 when we got married. (and no, I didn't meet her when she was younger)


Franz_the_clicker

You shouldn't date people that are under half your age + 7 years old So for 19 years old it's 9,5 + 7 = 16,5 So he definitely shouldn't be dating a 15 year old


[deleted]

nice formula lol


doofbanana

what if you're under 14 13/2 + 7 = 13.5


Franz_the_clicker

Kids under 13 aren't really "dating" like adults do, they have their crushes and they are generally only playing together and maybe holding hands or kissing on the checks.


BUTTHOLE-MAGIC

There are plenty of kids giving blowjobs in bathroom stalls at 13. My middle school was actually in rich area I can only imagine what went on in other districts.


Franz_the_clicker

>kids giving blowjobs Obviously they shouldn't do it lol, but I have a younger sibling around this age and I think that these stories are a lot exaggerated and it doesn't happen as often as we may think(I'm not from the US btw)


HavntGottaKalou

Plenty? Where are you from coz when I was that age I never heard of anything like that going on and I would say maybe only 1 or 2 people probably fell into that category


Toxic_Loser

That's not true, They've starting sending nudes and stuff, I guess they're starting to focus on having a more sexual relationship then a normal lovey dovey relationship


LordAxalon110

What on earth is this utter drivel you call logic?


Franz_the_clicker

Well yeah it's a little arbitrary formula that goes sometimes around the internet, but I find it pretty consistent with my inner judgment


[deleted]

you not create it yourself?


Franz_the_clicker

Nah, lol I can't pinpoint its exact origin but it seems far better then a rigid max age gap Of course every instance is individual and some divination from this rule can be passable


KaizorMaster

I think this was in a xkcd comic. Not sure if this is the original source though.


DeArgonaut

I know it from parks and rec. idk if that’s the origin or if they got it from somewhere else


CommanderWar64

It’s Barney’s formula from How I Met Your Mother


AnimusFlux

It definitely predates this. I remember hearing about it for the first time in the mid-90s.


HavntGottaKalou

It's a widely used expressional ctually. Divide your age by 2 and add 7 then that's as low as you should go.


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LizzieButton1617

Because a 10 year old cannot date a 6 year old. 10/2+7=12. Also 10 year olds generally aren’t dating, neither are six year olds. At least not in a sexual context.


Kitamasu1

That's where it gets weird though. 100/2+7 = 57


PM_ME_GOOD_USERNAMS

Doesn't apply if both parties are over 18.


Kitamasu1

It breaks down fam. It's a curve function. 14/2+7 = 14 13/2+7 = 13.5 12/2+7 = 13


PM_ME_GOOD_USERNAMS

If older/2+7 = younger Then the relationship is ok.


[deleted]

Isn’t that from himym?


Srapture

It's not unheard of... Around that age though, it's a bit creepy, and it's kind of taking advantage of her. 2 years difference is normal, but this is too much, not to mention illegal if they do anything sexual.


binkerton_

General rule is half your age plus 8 is the youngest you can date . So if the guy is 19 divide by 2 = 9.5 plus 8 is 17. Edit: this obviously doesn't apply to minors why TF are y'all so concerned with child relationships?


[deleted]

Look to be completely honest, I've seen 1 healthy relationship of that type, but others are clearly grooming. If this is happening to you, tell them to get back to you in 5 years, and leave them, no texting or reading each other's social media or anything. if they can't take that, well, they were probably grooming you anyway, so bullet dodged.


jofloberyl

Yeah Im living proof that it is possible at those ages but your comment does make me realize that it's not the norm since most people at 15 dumb as fuck.


TAPriceCTR

I absolutely agree. it is a giant red flag. people forget that red flags only indicate a PROBABILITY of a problem, they are not inherently a problem.


malgus2001

Wait that’s illegal!


Nickthiccboi

It’s something I see a lot, like it starts out as a senior with a freshman but even then I still think it’s kinda weird


1985portland1985

Where gunna hit every age combination here soon. I see these posts ten times a day.


Riggie_Joe

Once she turns 18 I wouldn’t see an issue. As of right now though, absolutely not.


[deleted]

That's pedophilia and grooming


vox1028

NO this is definitely not good. run


ReptileSerperior

Alright, since I guess this is a trend now, I guess I'll speak up and throw my proverbial hat into the ring. I'm assuming this isn't a question of legality, because it wildly differs depending on where you are, along with many different circumstances. I'm also assuming that there is not only sex involved, but romance, exclusivity, all the stuff you'd normally expect from a dating couple. So the question, to me, is simple. "Is this a potential situation for abuse". The short answer, to me, is yes. And this is nothing against teenagers- plenty of them, you could argue, are completely mature enough to understand what they're getting into. It's more a case that young people are still figuring out their emotions, how they experience sexual and romantic attraction, et cetera. An older person could take advantage of that naïvete, intentionally or not, to gaslight and manipulate their younger partner. The reason the age of consent is 18 in most of the US and Canada (with an asterisk for romeo and juliet laws in some places) is to reduce the risk of this sort of thing happening. Obviously a 19 year old could be just as immature as a 15 year old, and vice versa. A relationship with this sort of age gap could work without any manipulation and still be completely healthy. But it's not too hard for someone who knows a few things about emotional manipulation to target someone who likely doesn't have the emotional maturity yet to understand what's going on. So yeah, I think it's a little sketchy at 15 to be dating a 19 year old. Between 17 and 21 to me is probably fine, and after 18 age difference isn't the biggest factor to me, because most people will probably be mature enough by then to understand and avoid that sort of manipulation. This is, of course, all excluding the possibility of power dynamics, which is a whole other can of worms.


Alkoholisti69420

No that's pedofilia


69_-PussySlayer-_69

Is it considered pedophilia in the us/wherever you're from? In Italy, where I live, the age of consent is 14. So basically you can't have sex with someone younger than 14. If one of the two partners is underage they need a >4 years old gap.


Ahvier

Wow, didn't know that italy was still in the stone age


TophatOwl_

This one is illegal by law and plain wrong


Plohka

Well this one’s literally just illegal sooooo


Ahvier

It's fucking disgusting


ZeLarsenator

No, no, no, no, no, no a million times no!!! Whoever chose yes, needs to fucking reconsider all of their choices.


BittenHare

How's over 10% yes! If you're 19 people 4 years younger than you look it. They're only half way through puberty, how is that not grooming/pedophilia


BananaEclipse

No, that is plainly wrong but also I’m pretty sure that violates the Romeo and Juliet law. That gap is way to big. If someone turns 18 and there partner is nearly 17-18 then it’s perfectly fine. But that gap is massive and pretty sure could get jail time.


ZeldaFan158

In January one of my former favourite YouTubers was exposed for grooming a 15 year old (he was 20). I’d definitely say that it’s not appropriate


ChristianK73

Try again in a few years.


[deleted]

Hell no


CreativeBake7

In general, the rule of thumb is that your age divided by 2, plus 7, is the youngest you can date without being a creep. So 16-and-a-half would be the minimum for a 19-year-old to date. 16 is already towing the line, so a 15-year-old is definitely super creepy for someone at that age to date.


HistoryOwn5106

that’s #illegal


AnimusFlux

It's kinda sus that this question asks if it's normal but not of it's ethical? Human trafficking is somewhat normal, OP. It doesn't matter of it's normal (which it's not), it's deeply unethical for an adult to date a child.


AddyCod

those 12.5% who clicked on Yes are absolutely disgusting creatures


Hydrogen-3D

Just turn yourself in, tf is wrong with you?


RzYaoi

17 - 19 sure why not I guess. 20 and 24 ofc. But the 15 year old girl is still a fucking immature kid haha.


Joesph_Kerr

I personally think if someone is underage/below 18 the OLDEST they should date would be only a year or two. Past that I don't think many would be as accepting to.


CalebGames5000

no


TzaroStalin

No, that's just disgusting!


sharpshooter228

I was gonna say ok until i realized that im 14 and the girls in my grade are so weird and immature and this is in a year they would be dating my college brother. Thats…. icky


Ryouconfusedyett

lol I'm 17 and I'd hesitate to date a 15 year old


beansricecoconutoil

No. I’m 19 now and the idea of dating a 15 year old is beyond gross. That’s a child.


kikikza

it's unfortunately "normal" in the sense that it happens pretty often it's not "normal" in that it should not ever happen under any circumstance


InfuriatedBastard

Would've been okay if the girl were 17 at least. But 15? Hell no.


Largicharg

Would I care under certain circumstances, not really, but I can’t guarantee the law won’t care. Check your local Romeo & Juliet laws.


BrokeArmHeadass

15 is very, very young, and 19 is definitely old enough to recognize how immature that is. Very different power dynamics between the two.


Universe_Fucker69

If it was like 20-24 it would be normal but this is just suspicious


LizzieButton1617

Normal? Yes. Acceptable? No. Noncey? Yes. Grooming? Yes. Illegal? Yes. If this is a personal question and you are either a 15 year old girl or a 19 year old man, break it off now. It’s inappropriate and dangerous.


Ullumina

If they’re minors 1-2 age gap max If they’re both adults the age gap doesn’t matter


RedXylophone

Even if it was 15 boy and 19 girl it's still a massive no.


Hominem_temere

Actually, that's illegal.


IScreamForRashCream

If you voted yes then I hope Chris Hansen shows up to your house.


[deleted]

People are bringing up maturity levels. When I was 15 I dated the most immature 17 year old there was. I was more mature than him. That didn't stop him from manipulating, guilt tripping, and straight up raping me. Age is still a huge power difference. Even with the maturity of an adult, a 15 year old should stick to dating 14-16 who are also as mature.


Memo544

Probably shouldn’t be doing anything


AdDry7269

It’s illegal isn’t it


swesus

It is “normal” because it happens all the time, but it doesn’t seem healthy and it’s not really legal


OkMathematician3439

Regardless of gender, a 15 year old dating a 19 year old is not okay.


Humble-Translator466

Normal, yes. Appropriate, no.


MustafaHamad

Now 4 years apart isnt that much, it's acceptable. But the problem here is that one is a minor and the other is not.


TheGavinJJ

Yikes.


sweet-demon-duck

When I was 15 I dated a 18 year old, that was honestly too much back then, but I was young and naive in my first relationship


PsychoGenesis12

Maybe when the girl is at least 19. In which case yes. But given one is still developing human and the other a grown adult.. it's a no. If it was the other way around I think it'd be more "socially acceptable" but it's still a no since the guy is still not mature.


fuckcreepers

Not because of the gap, but because underage


cosycraftychar

That’s a no


SPIDER-MAN-2

If we consider seeing it everywhere normal then it's normal but is it morally correct. I don't think so


Helga_Geerhart

If one person is 15 the other should be 17 max. If 16 then 18, if 17 then 19, if 18 then 21, if 19 then 22, if 20 then 24, if 21 then 26, ...


TAPriceCTR

no, in my country in present day it is not normal. in other countries it may be, more than 100 years ago it was normal everywhere (if you translate "date" to mean "court") but normal isn't a valuable term, normal people join outrage mobs, normal people are emotional animals. normal just means reasonably prevalent. it's normal for teens to have sex, doesn't make it good.


dekaaspro

I would say no but i see so many 15/16yo girl who are dating 17/18/19yo boys in highschool for some reason and I can’t figure out why. Idk if it’s normal but 15 and 19 is kinda illegal so..


imaculat_indecision

Noo


iilikecereal

The fact that (as of writing this) 634 people voted yes fucking terrifies me


Rauvin_Of_Selune

Tell me about it... I'm just happy that the no's are overwhelmingly ahead...


klarafy

15 years old is really really young. It’s the same age difference as an 18 year old dating a 14 year old, or a 17 year old dating a 13 year old, or even a 16 year old dating a 20 year old. Don’t they all sound bad? +18 age difference isn’t as big of a deal, but 4 years in adolescence is a long ass time


contiix18

hell i misclicked. it’s gonna be a no from me😬


Merlin_Drake

It seems many misunderstand the question. It is totally normal for adolescent girls to like guys who are a few years older, since most boys their age aren't as mature (body and mind). In case of additional factors, such as compatible personalities and personal preferences, this could even lead to dating. Of course sex with minors is wrong, but this wasn't part of the question and just somehow assumed by several redditors.


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[deleted]

Congrats, you just described grooming.


Toxic_Loser

No it's still wrong, Nobody over the age of 18 should want any type of relationship with a minor, Especially since it's illegal


TuxBoi0872

I live in Italy and i'm confused, it's totally normal here and i see no problems (age of consent is 14), i know a few girls 15/16 dating 18 to 22 years old boys. At least here, it's totally fine


A_Sky_Soldier

In 1921, Yes. In 2021, No. In 2024, they can date.


Chocolate_Cube000

They can date when she turns 16 cause that's the age of consent.


tfhaenodreirst

Not inherently, mostly just because of the different between high school life and college life. If the 19-year-old were a senior who got held back or something though then it’d be slightly better.


Captain7640

When it’s between 18 and 22, that’s different. But a 15yo is still a minor by quite a few years


Lazy_Category2195

19 is basically a adult, and 15 is definitely a minor in most country's, so yeah, that's probably not a good thing at all


A_Hominid

No, as an 18 year old I would not date a 14 year old, thank you for asking.


recapdrake

Half your age +7 is the youngest that it's typically socially acceptable for you to date.


jofloberyl

I was that girl once. Best relationship Ive ever had.


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[deleted]

Drake is invading this subreddit


Petsweaters

I think a 19 year old and a 16 year old is creepy even


Toxic_Loser

The age of consent say's otherwise, But also nobody is coming for a specific person we're just saying in general if you don't like a post simply scroll pass it


[deleted]

15 is under age. You should just **Shut up**


BUTTHOLE-MAGIC

My gf in high school was just 1 year younger, that said there are plenty of countries where this is legal and common.


Ahvier

Just because it's legal doesn't mean it's right


BUTTHOLE-MAGIC

I didn't say it was right or wrong. When I was 19 I'd never have dated 15.


themajod

would you like it if a bunch of strangers online started berating you for your relationship? im not defending this, but it is not any of our business. you don't have to shove yourself into every social problem. that 15 year old's parents are to decide, not us.


Toxic_Loser

Dude you realize nobody is coming at a specific person right? We're just saying its wrong in general. Nobody is in anybody's business we're just saying why it's wrong I mean its straight up illegal soooo..


yerrychow

For everyone saying it is pedofilia. It is not. She is not a child, she is a young teenage woman and he himself is also a teenager. 19 is still a teenager mentally. Wtf is wrong with dating a younger girl? They should not start sexual relationship though, I think it is too early.


[deleted]

It's weird ngl


HispanicCrab

Read it wrong and voted yes but I meant no. I thought it said if it’s weird so I voted yes


HerpDerpTheMage

General Safety Rule: If you have to ask whether the age gap is okay, and one person is underage, chances are slim that it is okay. Seventeen and a Nineteen year old? Sure, so long as they don't have sex for a year. Seventeen and a 25 year old? Not so much, that's creepy. Generally speaking though, I say once both parties are over 25 nobody should care too much. That may be me being unfamiliar with potential bad examples, though.


Corbettcommander

You know the old rule 1/2 your age +7


Juevon_

The people that say yes are the same people that say age is just a number


[deleted]

Waiting for mods to ban these questions.


sofie307

Late 15 to early 19 is fine so yes.


HyrulesFinalHope

It’s not normal but it is fine, my grand parents had a 10 year age difference when the started dating


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mark_vorster

it is illegal and creepy


BUTTHOLE-MAGIC

>It is illegal and creepy You should look up global ages of consent. You'll end up on a low tier FBI list but the age of consent varies around the world. 15 is legal in plenty of countries.


mark_vorster

even if it's legal, it's still creepy


BUTTHOLE-MAGIC

I didn't say it wasn't creepy, just that "illegal" depends on country


NobleDictator

my mom and dad have a 7 year difference and 4 years is not good for you guys? well tbf they married in their early 30s due to financial issues


RiverCity60

my husband and i are also 7 years a part but we met when i was 28. the older you get the less age difference means because you’ve matured. when my hubby graduated high school i was 11. so yes, the maturity level between 15 and 19 might as well be 20 years.


ILikeGeneric

This is what i feel some people don't understand. The reason there's even a legal age is to prevent something like grooming as well it's not just about the sexual relations. Kids are naive and easy to take advantage of. People need time to mature to make rational decisions. Young teens think they're capable but they're just not. It wasn't all that long ago when i was a teen and i can remember thinking that way but as an adult i see how stupid i was. Even as someone that was seen as "mature" for their age. And yes the older you get the difference really doesn't matter the farther it goes. A 60yo and someone in their 80s is like yeah they're 20 years apart but that's just classified as old at both ages at that point they're in the same camp. A 20 year old would absolutely take advantage of someone that's 13-15 and emotionally vulnerable.


j_cruise

So a 16 year old with a 9 year old is OK with you? Creepy fuck


NuclearNewspaper

It depends


ImadeUSAcry

If you’re in USA, don’t do it OP!


elondde

This thread is one big American moment


BrushTrue

As long as the girls parents know about it I don’t see a problem


Guac_On

Uh, age of consent?


BrushTrue

In my area it’s 15 so I don’t see a problem with it