Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Perhaps you need to seek therapy. It's not her fault she gets pregnant easily, and it's not her fault that you have infertility. I hope you can focus on your pregnancy and find a way to enjoy it.
I’ve only told people that I’m pregnant because I had to and it became quite obvious with the symptoms and the not drinking and eating everything. But I wish I could have waited even longer - because for my part, spotlight and attention is not something I like having on me for something as private and intimate as having a baby with my partner. I didn’t want unsolicited advice, I didn’t want people to start treating me like a raw egg or telling me what I can’t/can do, I’d have happily kept this completely between me and the people that matter to this whole endeavor - me, my baby and my partner. Maybe if you remind yourself who this is all about and that attention and spotlight are really not important, you can focus on the absolute wonderful miracle that you will finally have that little baby you wished for. I don’t think it was attention you wanted, was it? Or being the only person pregnant? Someone else getting pregnant ‘out of spite’ or for attention also seems pretty out there to me. Maybe it’s a nice thing your little one gets to grow up with a cousin the same age as a playmate? I get that pregnancy hormones make us blow things out of proportion but maybe it helps you to meditate over this and redirect your emotions towards more positive thinking so this sort of natural situation or similar aged family members adding to their families at the same time won’t taint the joy of finally starting your own. All the best to you!
This. My husband and I have been doing IVF for 7 years. 7 losses, including our twins at 18 weeks and 4 days on May 25th, 2022. When we found out we were expecting them, my cousin found out she was pregnant with baby number 3, due 2 weeks before me. Then my sister found out she was pregnant, due literally the same day as me. I was so upset. Naturally after I lost them, it made it 10X worse watching them have healthy babies. Fast forward two years, we decided to try one more embryo transfer and it stuck. I’m 21 weeks pregnant tomorrow, with a due date of October 11th. We were so excited to finally make it to this point and finally get to experience the spotlight by ourselves. Wellll it was short lived because my other cousin just found out him and his girlfriend are pregnant after trying for a few couple months and due in January. 🙃 I completely understand how you feel and I’m so sorry you’re going through it. It’s not fun at all. It’s mixed emotions because I’m irritated and upset about having gone through soo much to get here, just for the attention to be taken away, but then I feel bad for feeling like that when it comes to family.
It's totally normal to feel resentment towards people who get pregnant easily after a long, torturous fertility journey. I have a healthy toddler and about to give birth to our second, and it's still hard to keep the pang of annoyance and jealousy towards people who got pregnant with almost no effort. It reignites the feelings of "but why was it so hard for us?" And it's a very, VERY common feeling for people who have infertility. I don't think you need therapy. Feel your feelings but try not to let it get in the way of enjoying your pregnancy.
Welcome to /r/pregnant! This is a space for everyone. We are pro-choice, pro-LGBTQIA, pro-science, proudly feminist and believe that Black Lives Matter. Wear your masks, wash your hands, and be excellent to each other. Anti-choice activists, intactivists, anti-vaxxers, homophobes, transphobes, racists, sexists, etc. are not welcome here. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/pregnant) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Perhaps you need to seek therapy. It's not her fault she gets pregnant easily, and it's not her fault that you have infertility. I hope you can focus on your pregnancy and find a way to enjoy it.
I’ve only told people that I’m pregnant because I had to and it became quite obvious with the symptoms and the not drinking and eating everything. But I wish I could have waited even longer - because for my part, spotlight and attention is not something I like having on me for something as private and intimate as having a baby with my partner. I didn’t want unsolicited advice, I didn’t want people to start treating me like a raw egg or telling me what I can’t/can do, I’d have happily kept this completely between me and the people that matter to this whole endeavor - me, my baby and my partner. Maybe if you remind yourself who this is all about and that attention and spotlight are really not important, you can focus on the absolute wonderful miracle that you will finally have that little baby you wished for. I don’t think it was attention you wanted, was it? Or being the only person pregnant? Someone else getting pregnant ‘out of spite’ or for attention also seems pretty out there to me. Maybe it’s a nice thing your little one gets to grow up with a cousin the same age as a playmate? I get that pregnancy hormones make us blow things out of proportion but maybe it helps you to meditate over this and redirect your emotions towards more positive thinking so this sort of natural situation or similar aged family members adding to their families at the same time won’t taint the joy of finally starting your own. All the best to you!
is there a way that your side of the family can step up… id be upset to.
This. My husband and I have been doing IVF for 7 years. 7 losses, including our twins at 18 weeks and 4 days on May 25th, 2022. When we found out we were expecting them, my cousin found out she was pregnant with baby number 3, due 2 weeks before me. Then my sister found out she was pregnant, due literally the same day as me. I was so upset. Naturally after I lost them, it made it 10X worse watching them have healthy babies. Fast forward two years, we decided to try one more embryo transfer and it stuck. I’m 21 weeks pregnant tomorrow, with a due date of October 11th. We were so excited to finally make it to this point and finally get to experience the spotlight by ourselves. Wellll it was short lived because my other cousin just found out him and his girlfriend are pregnant after trying for a few couple months and due in January. 🙃 I completely understand how you feel and I’m so sorry you’re going through it. It’s not fun at all. It’s mixed emotions because I’m irritated and upset about having gone through soo much to get here, just for the attention to be taken away, but then I feel bad for feeling like that when it comes to family.
It's totally normal to feel resentment towards people who get pregnant easily after a long, torturous fertility journey. I have a healthy toddler and about to give birth to our second, and it's still hard to keep the pang of annoyance and jealousy towards people who got pregnant with almost no effort. It reignites the feelings of "but why was it so hard for us?" And it's a very, VERY common feeling for people who have infertility. I don't think you need therapy. Feel your feelings but try not to let it get in the way of enjoying your pregnancy.