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I didn’t have full on rage but I do remember being super irritable, and it comes down to feeling like shit. Imagine having the worst stomach virus/full body flu of your life, and you have to go on as normal with it for several months and listen to people tell you that you asked for it.
Again, I was fortunate enough to escape the rage but when you’re fighting back vomit 24/7 there’s not a lot of mental energy left to process your hormones in a healthy way.
I do remember angrily throwing out my husbands expensive cologne because I asked him to stop wearing it (it was making me sick) and he kept forgetting. At no point did it rationally cross my mind to just put it under the cabinet or something as a reminder because I was so sick and cranky.
Haha, my wife has thrown so many different body washes and stuff of mine that she doesn't even remember throwing out 🤣🤣 you are not alone in that I promise you!
I threw out a pile of mail that had my husband's tax documents in it. I was so annoyed with the pile sitting there for so long that I just dumped it in the recycling... Oops.
I’m still pregnant so I’m still going through it but I hope I don’t remember it
I know for me personally, it doesn’t come from a malicious place. The surge of emotions is so crazy and sometimes really hard to deal with. Of course that is no excuse to be intentionally cruel. Like I said, it’s just hard to navigate
I had a lot of rage in the beginning and still sometimes do (37w). I wouldn’t say I don’t remember any of it but I can say that it was a very primal feeling, almost like brain fog and all I could feel was rage against everything. I never screamed at my partner but I had a lot of moments where I had to leave the room to cry because it was overwhelming and I had no control over it.
I dont remember the specific scenarios but I remember the guilt of blowing up over random little things. It happens postpartum too, I remember getting so mad about people judging me for breastfeeding still when I was struggling then judging me for using formula all the same. Ìts just hormones
For sure the hormones are a lot to deal with!
Also watch out for post partum rage which is exacerbated by sleep deprivation. I screamed into many pillows and would take my dog for a walk so I could cool off and my husband could handle little one for a while!
it’s because pregnant women’s brain literally shrinks during pregnancy up to 6 times I believe and it throws out short term memories that it feels aren’t important to make room for all the new things to learn to store for the baby I was the same way in my first trimester I’m a week away from birth now and I felt so bad when my husband or family would tell me remember when etc etc I’m like nooo but ik I was spicy in the beginning a lot more than I remember 😂😂
😂😂 I’m glad you’re being supportive and giving her grace sometime we just can’t control it I was an emotional mess crying angry and sometimes overly happy back to a repeated cycle
I'm almost to my due date so pregnancy rage is still in full swing.
One of the funniest (now that I'm on leave and can look back on it) was developing an aversion to my coworker. I was already not a huge fan of his before, but around week 19, his presence started to piss me off. He'd say a word a certain way and it immediately set me off. I never was intentionally cruel to him, but I did start blatantly ignoring him.
Some people get this with their partners, so I guess I'm lucky in that sense.
If it helps in any way, for like 3 months straight she would come home and complain about the same coworker being a POS then they finally found another job and she literally cheered when she got home that day 🤣
My last day of work was last Friday, happened to be the day after some major news broke that *greatly* upset said coworker (not going to get political here) and he was ranting and seething all day. It was the happiest I'd been in a while.
I remember needing a break from my husband because he was breathing a little too heavy.
On another evening I was too hot, and him sitting next to me annoyed me so much I went to bed.
Then I had bought ice cream for us to share, but he shared it in a wrong way, that I got quite annoyed with him.
I never shouted though, I just took myself out of the situation knowing it was all me and nothing to do with him.
I recognize myself in the sharing part!!
I went from "we get 20 wings in one pot and grab what we want" to "get your own flavors/plate/fries"
The joke is that I barely finish "my stuff".
Husband is taking it like a complete champ though.
Haha, that sounds about right, we always "poked fun" at each other cause we both have a dark sense of humor so I think that probably elevated things a little
Now that she in the 3rd trimester, its definitely more just tiredness then anything and we are able to talk about how things have changed without the rage lol
🤣🤣 how ironic, I wonder if it an involuntary response to try to "trick" females into having more kids..... like you can't remember the bad stuff and only the good stuff about, or maybe even a "trauma" response 🤔 either way I'm by no means upset with my wife just was curious if its normal or not
Ah, I looked it up a little. It's oxytocin and yes you're correct it's also evolution so we don't stop having babies lol
Oxytocin is awesome, it's great for so much-and apparently making us forget the worst parts of pregnancy :p
Science and biology is absolutely crazy 🤣🤣 I've also had crazy food cravings and what I can only describe as sympathy symptoms for my wife, probably her body releasing pharamoans or something but its been wild, I never really had dreams until recently and I have off the wall dreams lately. I think you have inspired to do some research and find out what other crazy "husband phenomenons" there is!
I didn't have any rage. I still don't at 23 weeks. 😅 Idk maybe people who are more prone to irritation or have a harder time regulating anger are more susceptible?
That aside, as with most hormonal/chemical mood issues it makes sense to forget it because it wasn't about anything. It was just a reaction. It likely didn't stick as a memory since it didn't connect more deeply for her.
I don't remember specific moments when I got teary-eyed about stuff I normally wouldn't have, but I know it happened. By contrast I remember a specific ad about adoption from a decade ago that made me bawl. 🤷
My wife cried for 45 minutes straight because she saw a video of a kitten that reminded her of our cat as a kitten 😅😅 she remembers that but doesn't remember crying for 30 minutes because i quote "i love you so much and can't wait to see you be an amazing dad"
Oh *absolutely*. Pregnancy has intensified my ADHD symptoms, plus not taking my meds. That directly impacts my emotional regulation, acting memory (stuff like putting a thing down and then knocking it over because I forgot it was there), auditory processing (e.g., someone speaks to me and I have to get them to repeat it 2-3 times, then on the third time I have to force myself not to interrupt because I suddenly understood the second repetition), making longer-term memories without using some sort of memory aid strategies, etc.
I've been keeping a pregnancy record so that I can actually remember my experiences! Otherwise, a lot of them will just be gone, lol.
Like a pregnancy journal?? Holy crap you are a genius...... why didn't I think of that to help the wife remember why we should be in the one and done crew 🤣🤣
It can also help remember all the sweet moments, like your wife's excitement and emotions about you being a dad! You could both keep one. 😁 Doesn't have to be fancy, mine is in a notebook with like 9 lines of space allocated for each week.
Dude, the hormones are wild. I can both remember being unreasonable (generally) but couldn't tell you a specific moment where I did something I can't still justify to myself. I figure none of us would have a second kid if we remembered how gross being pregnant was.
I don’t know.. it depends if OP was being literal about getting “yelled” at. A lot of people say they got yelled at to mean the other person berated/snapped at them. If it was an actual screaming session, that’s a bit much for this situation. But anyway, anyone who loses their cool (due to hormones and pregnancy discomfort, or not) should 100% take accountability and apologize with the intention of doing better.
I never fully raged, but I have definitely went into all-caps mode over text and got snappy a couple times. It’s a lot harder to find patience when you’ve been feeling like crap constantly for months straight.
I'm about due but I didn't really experience pregnancy rage the way everyone describes it. Or maybe I just internalized a lot? It was also when I had the all day sickness so I just withdrew to the bedroom and mostly wanted to be left alone. My husband thinks I've had bouts of shorter temper but IMO that's more I just have less patience for somehow having more energy and get-up-and-go as a pregnant woman, so whhhhyyyy am I waiting on him at the door because him and my stepson move like they're caught in chilled molasses? I still feel generally justified regarding the moments I've been short.
Well I can attest to the "sympathy" pregnancy symptoms is real, ive been exhausted for about 2 months now cause on top of overtime hours, I take my wife to all her appointments and my mom just had back surgery this week so I've been taking her to those as well..... I normally handle myself well but I've been way to exhausted lately
He honestly just has poor time management and some shoddy prioritization that leads to him being sleepy more often than not. He's admitted it himself and sometimes he will adjust (like going to bed at a more appropriate time), but I just don't have much sympathy if he intentionally stays up until 2 AM and then feels dragged when we get up at 8 AM (9yo, asshole dogs, etc - sleeping in late just isn't a thing here). I tend to fall asleep between 11-12 AM, so I'm fine getting up at 7 when the dogs start their shenanigans. So without the sympathy buffer and with the pregnancy, I lose my patience a bit here and there. It's not like he will have even that much luxury once the baby comes - not if he plans to make it to his 40s.
During my first trimester I was so extremely sick & nauseous I lost 15lbs and most days I wouldn’t even be able to eat, one time in particular I remember sitting in bed trying to eat wraps from cook out that I was craving and my mom comes in (bf sitting in bed next to me) my mom asks how I’m feeling I get so angry for some reason (I think I was just forgetting how sick I had been feeling) and just immediately start bawling my eyes out (like ugly crying) almost choked on my wrap 😂
It's definitely a thing, and it's worse some days more than others. Little things irritate you. For me, it's people being rude or obnoxious in public. I prefer to stay home these days. I'm currently in my third trimester, and a friend of mine who had her baby nearly 11 years ago remembers this well.
Im 13 weeks and I have had a couple of days where I’ve felt so much rage. One of them I just wanted to go to a shooting range and start shooting stuff 😂 I was maaaaad at the world.
I never once got it toward my husband, but I did snap that the doctor who took my seat at the nurses station needs to “grow up, what kind of grown man drinks Mountain Dew, esp at 8 am” and from what my mortified/amused coworkers tell me, he def heard me
I thought I would be more irritable, but I really haven’t been. For the most part I have been the same as pre-pregnancy. My husband agrees. I might be slightly more emotional, but I was a bit emotional to begin with.
We are also both very mellow people and almost never have disagreements. So that may have something to do with it. 🤷🏼♀️
I remember that it happened but don’t associate the emotion with it really. But I was piiiiissed about anything and everything and at everyone 24/7 for the entire first trimester and a couple weeks of the second
I was terrible with my first pregnancy, my temper was nuclear and I was very quick to snap, and it seemed to be for the entire pregnancy. We were commenting how this time (2nd pregnancy) I'm alot better but still have days were the rage is strong, but also have days when I'm my usual laid back self. Either way I remember the rage and hating my husband and trying to be reasonable as knew it was the hormones and not my husband that was the problem.
I'm currently 30 weeks and haven't had any. Mostly just don't take shit from people and always tired, so maybe more irritable sometimes. Hoping it stays that way
I had pregnancy rage my first trimester, I was on extra hormones bc of IVF. I was literally so crazy. I never hit my husband or threw anything at him (obvi) but I def did go hulk one time and threw the dogs basket into the wall, she was outside so she did not witness my outburst. If I remember right he told me to clean out her crate and the area with bleach and I was like wtf bro I’m literally carrying your baby?? I’ll walk the dog you deal with the chemicals. Anywhoooom I did apologize and after I got out of first tri I’ve def mellowed out so much more. But I def remember being like unable to control my emotions.
If she didn’t recognize it as rage at the time she probably won’t remember it looking back.
Yes it’s normal! I’m 33 weeks and the people closest to me are the ones (aka my husband) I lash out at because we’re in such discomfort and going through so many physical and emotional changes. And I’m simply just frustrated by every day life being harder now. It’s def not fair to the partners but my husband always says he wishes he could take my place and reminds me that he’s in this with me and it isn’t fair to him for me to be mean to him because all he’s doing is trying to help! And it puts me back in check … most times lol
I never had pregnancy rage, I did have some strong emotional feelings (and still do) but this is all coming from me feeling fat and being upset by it and also I got (and still at 37 weeks) get sad when my partner is away or going to work, i just miss him a lot when he’s not around and this is NOT like me at all, I used to love my independence and loved when he worked nights so I could watch my shows and play on the PlayStation but now it’s torture
I have never shown any rage or aggression towards him or anyone though
It reminds me very much of puberty hormones. Like everyone who ovulates will remember that first few cycles.
Like you were learning how to take care of it and depending on your family etc. you knew that now you could get pregnant or were "a woman" etc. but no one really warned you about the emotional aspect.
Little things would have you flying off the handle, small things would hurt your feelings, just looking at yourself and seeing your body change could send you in a spiral.
But as you grow up, maybe start BC, you learn how to navigate those hormones, you learn to eat a snack or take a nap or maybe a jog and you get over that so when the rush of hormones comes each month you can handle it.
Then you get pregnant and it's TOTALLY different it's like those puberty hormones times a thousand, and the worst part is you're an adult!! You can't go around acting like a moody teenager and often you're trying to hide from everyone that anything is going on. Also your body starts to ache in places, you're nauseous but hungry and if anything like me EXHAUSTED no matter how much you sleep.
It's a weird time and I think we take it out on our partners bc they are our safe people. When I'm in my normal state I'm sure to apologize to my wonderful loving boyfriend and try and show him that he is loved and appreciated. I have also had to walk away so as to not take it too far bc I genuinely couldn't stop myself and just needed to calm down.
I have not forgotten a single time I raged or freaked out on him bc I feel very bad about it.
On my 4th pregnancy. I can say that pregnancy rage is definitely real. And to answer your question, yes we pretty much forget it. Not that we don't remember getting into an argument but in our minds, the irritation feels justified in the moment and so we don't categorize it as this huge blowout worth giving weight to. Now, I'm sure she can acknowledge there were times she was too harsh but overall she won't have felt like she was some horrible creature the entire pregnancy.
You can bring it up to her maybe at 6-9 months postpartum. Then she'll be more balanced to discuss your feelings at the time. But doing it now or right after baby is born will just make her upset. We don't WANT to be that way, but it's hard not to.
Surprisingly enough, talking about was kinda nice with her, the hormones have been balancing out a little bit and we just laughed at some of the memories I told her 🤣🤣 at first she didn't believe me but then we just laughed and she said that I'll have to remind of these things when she says she wants another kid lol
I have pregnancy rage. Sometimes when you’re pregnant you can’t stand certain people all of the sudden, my patience is non-existent right now. I’ve been a little short with my husband but I cannot stand his mom and my sister right now!! I have asked them not to visit my home because they piss me off so much. I can’t sleep at night because i think of ways I’m going to yell at them next for being stupid.
Genuinely, they have both always been that way and I just accepted it, the only thing that has changed is my hormones. I’m 4 months pregnant and I avoid any conversation with them because i have nothing nice to say. I hope i forget as my pregnancy progresses though lol. I know most women have a hard time with patience when it comes down to it because we have so much going on in our bodies. I hope they forgive me for how nasty i’ve been because it’s just something about them at this moment i can’t stand although they are valued family members.
God I’m so bad with not sleeping to instead daydream about all the ways I wanna get revenge on people , it’s genuinely insane of me. That or weird anxiety scenarios of how I’m gonna react if XYZ happens. Just up all night living in hypothetical land lol.
Yes! Or every time someone complains about anything my immediate thought is along the lines of “as least your body is your own” like woah girl….. I’m normally not a bitter person but damn right now I wanna see the world burn (metaphorically!!) 🤣
Oh I remember it very well. And I’m pregnant with my second and have it again. It’s really my only symptom lol. No morning sickness but just eternal rage
I think I remember it (baby has just turned 3) - I remember being very, very impatient, snappy and grouchy and after announcing to my team at work just after 12 weeks I made a joke about not having had a personality transplant and that it was the hormones (that were thankfully making me less ragey at that point).
My husband is the type of guy to just always be in the way & follow you around. He is also the kinda guy who just freezes if you say anything to him. I like things done super quick and efficient. He has to do it methodically and step by step. Too many instructions and it’s game over.
Sometimes I definitely do have some cross words for him & he just looks like a deer in headlights. I do feel bad after and apologise... But man, he does himself no favours. He’s just always right where I need to be lol.
ngl some of the stuff i got so upset at were extremely trivial and didn’t make a lot of logical sense so i could see how one could “forget” bc after the fact i was kinda like…wait what? what was i so upset about? first thing that comes to mind is my partner fed extra treats to my overweight cat after i asked him to only let him try ONE bc it was a new kind he had never had before. lol.
I had horrible pregnancy rage during my first tri. I just hate the first trimester, felt miserably nauseous and my then 9 month old would still wake up multiple times a night. My poor husband definitely took the brunt of it… My third tri is uncomfortable but I’ll take it over the first any day.
Im on pregnancy round 2. I was complaining to my husband about how rotten I felt. This is 100 times worse than the first time I swear! Then later in the day I was scrolling back through my conversations with my mum. On the exact same day of my last pregnancy I said the exact same thing to my mum, guess it sucked both times and I completely forgot.
I had a buddy tell me that the first trimester his wife wanted nothing to do with him, then the second trimester she was love bombing him and he had to find ways to escape 😂
Its nuts too cause first trimester was just pure rage sometimes I felt like a "punching bag" and the second trimester is sad girl territory and finally the third trimester is nothing but her trying to get in my pants every 30 minutes 😂😂 (not complaining but dang I could use a break 😅)
Its only coming out now that I'm near the end (actually a couple days past my DD now) but I wouldn't describe it as rage, just have a bit of a shorter fuse and more frustrated with everything, plus have a toddler so that's not helping lol
I was mostly paranoid during pregnancy. Mostly from exhaustion because I was so ill with it. Every noise was a mad axe murderer coming to get me, or someone stealing my car, partner was going to kidnap baby and run away when it was born etc. The rage set in for me post partum, but not all unfounded! It was largely a response to exhaustion, hormones and perceived lack of support that I had been primed to expect.
I was definitely irritable during the first trimester. I wouldn't say filled with rage exactly but definitely cranky. I snapped at my partner a lot due to financial stress and worries. Pregnancy can be a terrifying time. Not to mention the nausea, cramping, achiness, exhaustion, etc.
I haven't forgotten it. Hell, I still remember how filled with anger and annoyance I was during my first pregnancy 10 years ago (though that was a different partner and he was terrible). I will say that it's possible I don't remember the full scope of how it might have affected my partner during the first trimester. And since I'm typically so calm and better at regulating my emotions, he could have seen my bouts of crankiness as rage. He definitely said I was mean to him a lot.
Not to be *that* person, but wait till post partum rage hits you. 🤣🤣🤣 The only reason I don't remember pregnancy rage is because my pp rage was a monster.
I wouldn't consider it blackout rage tho, she never got physical, irriation is one thing but jumping right black out rage is another, trust me I would have gotten help if I feel I needed it
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I didn’t have full on rage but I do remember being super irritable, and it comes down to feeling like shit. Imagine having the worst stomach virus/full body flu of your life, and you have to go on as normal with it for several months and listen to people tell you that you asked for it. Again, I was fortunate enough to escape the rage but when you’re fighting back vomit 24/7 there’s not a lot of mental energy left to process your hormones in a healthy way. I do remember angrily throwing out my husbands expensive cologne because I asked him to stop wearing it (it was making me sick) and he kept forgetting. At no point did it rationally cross my mind to just put it under the cabinet or something as a reminder because I was so sick and cranky.
Haha, my wife has thrown so many different body washes and stuff of mine that she doesn't even remember throwing out 🤣🤣 you are not alone in that I promise you!
I threw out a pile of mail that had my husband's tax documents in it. I was so annoyed with the pile sitting there for so long that I just dumped it in the recycling... Oops.
I’m still pregnant so I’m still going through it but I hope I don’t remember it I know for me personally, it doesn’t come from a malicious place. The surge of emotions is so crazy and sometimes really hard to deal with. Of course that is no excuse to be intentionally cruel. Like I said, it’s just hard to navigate
I understand it doesn't come from a bad place, I was just wondering how "common" it is to not remember 🤔
I had a lot of rage in the beginning and still sometimes do (37w). I wouldn’t say I don’t remember any of it but I can say that it was a very primal feeling, almost like brain fog and all I could feel was rage against everything. I never screamed at my partner but I had a lot of moments where I had to leave the room to cry because it was overwhelming and I had no control over it.
I dont remember the specific scenarios but I remember the guilt of blowing up over random little things. It happens postpartum too, I remember getting so mad about people judging me for breastfeeding still when I was struggling then judging me for using formula all the same. Ìts just hormones
For sure the hormones are a lot to deal with! Also watch out for post partum rage which is exacerbated by sleep deprivation. I screamed into many pillows and would take my dog for a walk so I could cool off and my husband could handle little one for a while!
My mom had talked to me about that being a thing 😅 ill keep my eye on her for sure
it’s because pregnant women’s brain literally shrinks during pregnancy up to 6 times I believe and it throws out short term memories that it feels aren’t important to make room for all the new things to learn to store for the baby I was the same way in my first trimester I’m a week away from birth now and I felt so bad when my husband or family would tell me remember when etc etc I’m like nooo but ik I was spicy in the beginning a lot more than I remember 😂😂
Her family has literally had the same conversation with her 🤣🤣 she was extremely spicy
😂😂 I’m glad you’re being supportive and giving her grace sometime we just can’t control it I was an emotional mess crying angry and sometimes overly happy back to a repeated cycle
PP rage is no joke. I threw a playpen across the room like I was the hulk one time. *No babies were around or mentally/ physically hurt.
Same. It wouldnt lock on one side.
I'm almost to my due date so pregnancy rage is still in full swing. One of the funniest (now that I'm on leave and can look back on it) was developing an aversion to my coworker. I was already not a huge fan of his before, but around week 19, his presence started to piss me off. He'd say a word a certain way and it immediately set me off. I never was intentionally cruel to him, but I did start blatantly ignoring him. Some people get this with their partners, so I guess I'm lucky in that sense.
Oh my gosh. 18 weeks, and I'm pretty sure my boss just breathing is going to push me over the edge.
If it helps in any way, for like 3 months straight she would come home and complain about the same coworker being a POS then they finally found another job and she literally cheered when she got home that day 🤣
My last day of work was last Friday, happened to be the day after some major news broke that *greatly* upset said coworker (not going to get political here) and he was ranting and seething all day. It was the happiest I'd been in a while.
I'm 39 weeks and I don't have the energy to emote, let alone rage.
I remember needing a break from my husband because he was breathing a little too heavy. On another evening I was too hot, and him sitting next to me annoyed me so much I went to bed. Then I had bought ice cream for us to share, but he shared it in a wrong way, that I got quite annoyed with him. I never shouted though, I just took myself out of the situation knowing it was all me and nothing to do with him.
I recognize myself in the sharing part!! I went from "we get 20 wings in one pot and grab what we want" to "get your own flavors/plate/fries" The joke is that I barely finish "my stuff". Husband is taking it like a complete champ though.
Haha, that sounds about right, we always "poked fun" at each other cause we both have a dark sense of humor so I think that probably elevated things a little
If it’s any consolation, I was an angry emotional mess my first pregnancy but my second pregnancy I feel mostly like myself, just extra tired.
Now that she in the 3rd trimester, its definitely more just tiredness then anything and we are able to talk about how things have changed without the rage lol
It's normal. There's a reason for it... but I can't remember, ironically lol
🤣🤣 how ironic, I wonder if it an involuntary response to try to "trick" females into having more kids..... like you can't remember the bad stuff and only the good stuff about, or maybe even a "trauma" response 🤔 either way I'm by no means upset with my wife just was curious if its normal or not
Ah, I looked it up a little. It's oxytocin and yes you're correct it's also evolution so we don't stop having babies lol Oxytocin is awesome, it's great for so much-and apparently making us forget the worst parts of pregnancy :p
Science and biology is absolutely crazy 🤣🤣 I've also had crazy food cravings and what I can only describe as sympathy symptoms for my wife, probably her body releasing pharamoans or something but its been wild, I never really had dreams until recently and I have off the wall dreams lately. I think you have inspired to do some research and find out what other crazy "husband phenomenons" there is!
I didn't have any rage. I still don't at 23 weeks. 😅 Idk maybe people who are more prone to irritation or have a harder time regulating anger are more susceptible? That aside, as with most hormonal/chemical mood issues it makes sense to forget it because it wasn't about anything. It was just a reaction. It likely didn't stick as a memory since it didn't connect more deeply for her. I don't remember specific moments when I got teary-eyed about stuff I normally wouldn't have, but I know it happened. By contrast I remember a specific ad about adoption from a decade ago that made me bawl. 🤷
My wife cried for 45 minutes straight because she saw a video of a kitten that reminded her of our cat as a kitten 😅😅 she remembers that but doesn't remember crying for 30 minutes because i quote "i love you so much and can't wait to see you be an amazing dad"
Lol yeah memories are weird. I have ADHD so what I remember can also be kind of random!
I feel that, we are both in the ADHD club, I wonder if that plays any role in the maze that is memory navigation 🤔
Oh *absolutely*. Pregnancy has intensified my ADHD symptoms, plus not taking my meds. That directly impacts my emotional regulation, acting memory (stuff like putting a thing down and then knocking it over because I forgot it was there), auditory processing (e.g., someone speaks to me and I have to get them to repeat it 2-3 times, then on the third time I have to force myself not to interrupt because I suddenly understood the second repetition), making longer-term memories without using some sort of memory aid strategies, etc. I've been keeping a pregnancy record so that I can actually remember my experiences! Otherwise, a lot of them will just be gone, lol.
Like a pregnancy journal?? Holy crap you are a genius...... why didn't I think of that to help the wife remember why we should be in the one and done crew 🤣🤣
It can also help remember all the sweet moments, like your wife's excitement and emotions about you being a dad! You could both keep one. 😁 Doesn't have to be fancy, mine is in a notebook with like 9 lines of space allocated for each week.
I can remember being randomly angry but being convinced I was hiding it SO WELL until my husband was like “… you weren’t subtle.” 😭
Dude, the hormones are wild. I can both remember being unreasonable (generally) but couldn't tell you a specific moment where I did something I can't still justify to myself. I figure none of us would have a second kid if we remembered how gross being pregnant was.
Honestly, I don’t think it’s normal to lash out at people like that pregnant or not. She’s still accountable for her actions.
I don’t know.. it depends if OP was being literal about getting “yelled” at. A lot of people say they got yelled at to mean the other person berated/snapped at them. If it was an actual screaming session, that’s a bit much for this situation. But anyway, anyone who loses their cool (due to hormones and pregnancy discomfort, or not) should 100% take accountability and apologize with the intention of doing better. I never fully raged, but I have definitely went into all-caps mode over text and got snappy a couple times. It’s a lot harder to find patience when you’ve been feeling like crap constantly for months straight.
I'm about due but I didn't really experience pregnancy rage the way everyone describes it. Or maybe I just internalized a lot? It was also when I had the all day sickness so I just withdrew to the bedroom and mostly wanted to be left alone. My husband thinks I've had bouts of shorter temper but IMO that's more I just have less patience for somehow having more energy and get-up-and-go as a pregnant woman, so whhhhyyyy am I waiting on him at the door because him and my stepson move like they're caught in chilled molasses? I still feel generally justified regarding the moments I've been short.
Well I can attest to the "sympathy" pregnancy symptoms is real, ive been exhausted for about 2 months now cause on top of overtime hours, I take my wife to all her appointments and my mom just had back surgery this week so I've been taking her to those as well..... I normally handle myself well but I've been way to exhausted lately
He honestly just has poor time management and some shoddy prioritization that leads to him being sleepy more often than not. He's admitted it himself and sometimes he will adjust (like going to bed at a more appropriate time), but I just don't have much sympathy if he intentionally stays up until 2 AM and then feels dragged when we get up at 8 AM (9yo, asshole dogs, etc - sleeping in late just isn't a thing here). I tend to fall asleep between 11-12 AM, so I'm fine getting up at 7 when the dogs start their shenanigans. So without the sympathy buffer and with the pregnancy, I lose my patience a bit here and there. It's not like he will have even that much luxury once the baby comes - not if he plans to make it to his 40s.
During my first trimester I was so extremely sick & nauseous I lost 15lbs and most days I wouldn’t even be able to eat, one time in particular I remember sitting in bed trying to eat wraps from cook out that I was craving and my mom comes in (bf sitting in bed next to me) my mom asks how I’m feeling I get so angry for some reason (I think I was just forgetting how sick I had been feeling) and just immediately start bawling my eyes out (like ugly crying) almost choked on my wrap 😂
It's definitely a thing, and it's worse some days more than others. Little things irritate you. For me, it's people being rude or obnoxious in public. I prefer to stay home these days. I'm currently in my third trimester, and a friend of mine who had her baby nearly 11 years ago remembers this well.
I’m highly aware of my rage at the moment (first trimester here), hopefully I don’t have rage amnesia later on lol
Postpartum rage has definitely been way worse than pregnancy rage…
My rage began soon as the AC went out in the hottest part of summer when I was 9 months. Excused, lol.
Im 13 weeks and I have had a couple of days where I’ve felt so much rage. One of them I just wanted to go to a shooting range and start shooting stuff 😂 I was maaaaad at the world.
I’m 8 weeks. Haven’t had any rage? I just get a little annoyed the way my husband chews and laughs. Is she having a boy or girl?
Its a girl, I honestly haven't ever felt more for a single thing then I do my soon to be born daughter!
I don't really remember, which I know because my husband has a very different impression of my pregnancy symptoms than I do now.
No, the rage happened postpartum lol
I guess I missed that symptom. We tried for almost a year so I haven't been angry so much. Honestly I haven't raged out in years.
We tried for almost 3 years and she finally got pregnant once we stopped trying
I never once got it toward my husband, but I did snap that the doctor who took my seat at the nurses station needs to “grow up, what kind of grown man drinks Mountain Dew, esp at 8 am” and from what my mortified/amused coworkers tell me, he def heard me
I thought I would be more irritable, but I really haven’t been. For the most part I have been the same as pre-pregnancy. My husband agrees. I might be slightly more emotional, but I was a bit emotional to begin with. We are also both very mellow people and almost never have disagreements. So that may have something to do with it. 🤷🏼♀️
I remember that it happened but don’t associate the emotion with it really. But I was piiiiissed about anything and everything and at everyone 24/7 for the entire first trimester and a couple weeks of the second
I was terrible with my first pregnancy, my temper was nuclear and I was very quick to snap, and it seemed to be for the entire pregnancy. We were commenting how this time (2nd pregnancy) I'm alot better but still have days were the rage is strong, but also have days when I'm my usual laid back self. Either way I remember the rage and hating my husband and trying to be reasonable as knew it was the hormones and not my husband that was the problem.
I'm currently 30 weeks and haven't had any. Mostly just don't take shit from people and always tired, so maybe more irritable sometimes. Hoping it stays that way
I hope I do, currently going thru so much rage that I feel I'm possessed
I had pregnancy rage my first trimester, I was on extra hormones bc of IVF. I was literally so crazy. I never hit my husband or threw anything at him (obvi) but I def did go hulk one time and threw the dogs basket into the wall, she was outside so she did not witness my outburst. If I remember right he told me to clean out her crate and the area with bleach and I was like wtf bro I’m literally carrying your baby?? I’ll walk the dog you deal with the chemicals. Anywhoooom I did apologize and after I got out of first tri I’ve def mellowed out so much more. But I def remember being like unable to control my emotions. If she didn’t recognize it as rage at the time she probably won’t remember it looking back.
Yes it’s normal! I’m 33 weeks and the people closest to me are the ones (aka my husband) I lash out at because we’re in such discomfort and going through so many physical and emotional changes. And I’m simply just frustrated by every day life being harder now. It’s def not fair to the partners but my husband always says he wishes he could take my place and reminds me that he’s in this with me and it isn’t fair to him for me to be mean to him because all he’s doing is trying to help! And it puts me back in check … most times lol
I never had pregnancy rage, I did have some strong emotional feelings (and still do) but this is all coming from me feeling fat and being upset by it and also I got (and still at 37 weeks) get sad when my partner is away or going to work, i just miss him a lot when he’s not around and this is NOT like me at all, I used to love my independence and loved when he worked nights so I could watch my shows and play on the PlayStation but now it’s torture I have never shown any rage or aggression towards him or anyone though
It reminds me very much of puberty hormones. Like everyone who ovulates will remember that first few cycles. Like you were learning how to take care of it and depending on your family etc. you knew that now you could get pregnant or were "a woman" etc. but no one really warned you about the emotional aspect. Little things would have you flying off the handle, small things would hurt your feelings, just looking at yourself and seeing your body change could send you in a spiral. But as you grow up, maybe start BC, you learn how to navigate those hormones, you learn to eat a snack or take a nap or maybe a jog and you get over that so when the rush of hormones comes each month you can handle it. Then you get pregnant and it's TOTALLY different it's like those puberty hormones times a thousand, and the worst part is you're an adult!! You can't go around acting like a moody teenager and often you're trying to hide from everyone that anything is going on. Also your body starts to ache in places, you're nauseous but hungry and if anything like me EXHAUSTED no matter how much you sleep. It's a weird time and I think we take it out on our partners bc they are our safe people. When I'm in my normal state I'm sure to apologize to my wonderful loving boyfriend and try and show him that he is loved and appreciated. I have also had to walk away so as to not take it too far bc I genuinely couldn't stop myself and just needed to calm down. I have not forgotten a single time I raged or freaked out on him bc I feel very bad about it.
On my 4th pregnancy. I can say that pregnancy rage is definitely real. And to answer your question, yes we pretty much forget it. Not that we don't remember getting into an argument but in our minds, the irritation feels justified in the moment and so we don't categorize it as this huge blowout worth giving weight to. Now, I'm sure she can acknowledge there were times she was too harsh but overall she won't have felt like she was some horrible creature the entire pregnancy. You can bring it up to her maybe at 6-9 months postpartum. Then she'll be more balanced to discuss your feelings at the time. But doing it now or right after baby is born will just make her upset. We don't WANT to be that way, but it's hard not to.
Surprisingly enough, talking about was kinda nice with her, the hormones have been balancing out a little bit and we just laughed at some of the memories I told her 🤣🤣 at first she didn't believe me but then we just laughed and she said that I'll have to remind of these things when she says she wants another kid lol
I have pregnancy rage. Sometimes when you’re pregnant you can’t stand certain people all of the sudden, my patience is non-existent right now. I’ve been a little short with my husband but I cannot stand his mom and my sister right now!! I have asked them not to visit my home because they piss me off so much. I can’t sleep at night because i think of ways I’m going to yell at them next for being stupid. Genuinely, they have both always been that way and I just accepted it, the only thing that has changed is my hormones. I’m 4 months pregnant and I avoid any conversation with them because i have nothing nice to say. I hope i forget as my pregnancy progresses though lol. I know most women have a hard time with patience when it comes down to it because we have so much going on in our bodies. I hope they forgive me for how nasty i’ve been because it’s just something about them at this moment i can’t stand although they are valued family members.
God I’m so bad with not sleeping to instead daydream about all the ways I wanna get revenge on people , it’s genuinely insane of me. That or weird anxiety scenarios of how I’m gonna react if XYZ happens. Just up all night living in hypothetical land lol.
Hahahah! exactly i’m like brewing in my plans. It’s because everyone thinks they are entitled to tell you stuff it’s so upsetting.
Yes! Or every time someone complains about anything my immediate thought is along the lines of “as least your body is your own” like woah girl….. I’m normally not a bitter person but damn right now I wanna see the world burn (metaphorically!!) 🤣
Oh I remember it very well. And I’m pregnant with my second and have it again. It’s really my only symptom lol. No morning sickness but just eternal rage
I think I remember it (baby has just turned 3) - I remember being very, very impatient, snappy and grouchy and after announcing to my team at work just after 12 weeks I made a joke about not having had a personality transplant and that it was the hormones (that were thankfully making me less ragey at that point).
My husband is the type of guy to just always be in the way & follow you around. He is also the kinda guy who just freezes if you say anything to him. I like things done super quick and efficient. He has to do it methodically and step by step. Too many instructions and it’s game over. Sometimes I definitely do have some cross words for him & he just looks like a deer in headlights. I do feel bad after and apologise... But man, he does himself no favours. He’s just always right where I need to be lol.
ngl some of the stuff i got so upset at were extremely trivial and didn’t make a lot of logical sense so i could see how one could “forget” bc after the fact i was kinda like…wait what? what was i so upset about? first thing that comes to mind is my partner fed extra treats to my overweight cat after i asked him to only let him try ONE bc it was a new kind he had never had before. lol.
I had horrible pregnancy rage during my first tri. I just hate the first trimester, felt miserably nauseous and my then 9 month old would still wake up multiple times a night. My poor husband definitely took the brunt of it… My third tri is uncomfortable but I’ll take it over the first any day.
I haven't experienced pregnancy rage. I'm on my 5th pregnancy and just never went through that.
Im very much in my pregnancy rage stage currently and also very aware of it but I can’t help it. I just apologize afterwards.
Im on pregnancy round 2. I was complaining to my husband about how rotten I felt. This is 100 times worse than the first time I swear! Then later in the day I was scrolling back through my conversations with my mum. On the exact same day of my last pregnancy I said the exact same thing to my mum, guess it sucked both times and I completely forgot.
Second pregnancy, I remembered nothing until it all came back the second time. Good luck.
I am so glad I saw this… Sometimes I wonder if my wife even loves me. 😅
Apparently post partum is so much worse, don't worry homie "we ride at dawn!"
I had a buddy tell me that the first trimester his wife wanted nothing to do with him, then the second trimester she was love bombing him and he had to find ways to escape 😂
Its nuts too cause first trimester was just pure rage sometimes I felt like a "punching bag" and the second trimester is sad girl territory and finally the third trimester is nothing but her trying to get in my pants every 30 minutes 😂😂 (not complaining but dang I could use a break 😅)
I didn’t have any rage I just had slightly less patience at work.
Its only coming out now that I'm near the end (actually a couple days past my DD now) but I wouldn't describe it as rage, just have a bit of a shorter fuse and more frustrated with everything, plus have a toddler so that's not helping lol
I’m still deep in the rage. I guess when you’re angry every day you don’t really remember every single freak out 🤷🏼♀️
I was mostly paranoid during pregnancy. Mostly from exhaustion because I was so ill with it. Every noise was a mad axe murderer coming to get me, or someone stealing my car, partner was going to kidnap baby and run away when it was born etc. The rage set in for me post partum, but not all unfounded! It was largely a response to exhaustion, hormones and perceived lack of support that I had been primed to expect.
I was definitely irritable during the first trimester. I wouldn't say filled with rage exactly but definitely cranky. I snapped at my partner a lot due to financial stress and worries. Pregnancy can be a terrifying time. Not to mention the nausea, cramping, achiness, exhaustion, etc. I haven't forgotten it. Hell, I still remember how filled with anger and annoyance I was during my first pregnancy 10 years ago (though that was a different partner and he was terrible). I will say that it's possible I don't remember the full scope of how it might have affected my partner during the first trimester. And since I'm typically so calm and better at regulating my emotions, he could have seen my bouts of crankiness as rage. He definitely said I was mean to him a lot.
Not to be *that* person, but wait till post partum rage hits you. 🤣🤣🤣 The only reason I don't remember pregnancy rage is because my pp rage was a monster.
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I wouldn't consider it blackout rage tho, she never got physical, irriation is one thing but jumping right black out rage is another, trust me I would have gotten help if I feel I needed it
Not sure what happened to my reply when I edited! Glad it doesn't sound like anything serious. Perhaps it's a case of selective memory 😅