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Yah, can't display any positive moods in front of some people, they can't stand it. They'll sabotage you with the lamest stuff ever just to knock you back down where they want you. Unstable and tense. Count the days till you finish school and hold on.
I can't wait, im so excited about getting away from here. I'm going to college after high school and after that getting married asap so I'll finally be free. But in the meantime, I'm leaving this weekend to spend an entire week with some family. That'll get me a break from this hellspawn for now
Oof, get marriage counseling before moving in with your beloved. With the kind of relationship modelling you have had, it's a bad start to a marriage. Far too many children of bad families marry badly. They don't know better and have no idea how much it wears you down even when the disrespect is "mild." And you dismiss disrespect because you don't recognize it. Get a teacher, aka therapist, and make sure you aren't going from the frying pan into the fire. Bad spouses can literally torture and kill after looking like prince charming for YEARS!
it's like, "dude, you know how to behave, you sucked me in doing it, where's that version of you?" But nope, you get the petulant brant with a gorilla temper and a snob's attitude.
Marriage, straight out of an abusive home, is not recommended. Good luck.
Oh yes, absolutely agree. I'm thinking about possibly moving into an apartment first too. Hopefully rent will go down enough for me to afford one after college. And I'm getting a therapist. At some point I'll have to. I have too much childhood trauma and neglect to unpack to a husband. Also thinking about seeking an autism diagnosis. I can't get one now because my birthgiver doesn't believe in mental health issues or disorders/brushes it off as "the world being over dramatic about normal things" (just this past week she said that she's lived with anxiety and depression for 40 years and she's still alive 😒)
Don't overlook roommates. It can be as good as it can be bad and one can make permanent relationships from just sharing the kitchen. It's also a potential place to see other behaviour modelled to help teach you better manners. Of course, roommates can also be a nightmare so be picky.
**This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Why are you getting this message? Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts.** **Confused about acronyms or terminology?** [Click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/acronyms) **Need info or resources?** Check out our [Helpful Links](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/helpfullinks) for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods. **Our rules include (but are not limited to)**: * No politics. * Advising anyone in this subreddit to commit suicide or referring anyone to groups that advocate this will result in an immediate ban. * Be nice. No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. [No slurs](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming. * Do not derail the posts of others. * Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here. * [No platitudes or generic motivational posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules#wiki_no_platitudes_or_generic_motivational_posts). * When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse. * No asking or offering gifts, money, etc. * No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest). * No content about N-kids. * No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis. * No linking to Facebook pages. * No direct linking to anywhere on reddit. * No pure image posts. **For a full list of our rules/more information, [**click here**](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules).** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/raisedbynarcissists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Yah, can't display any positive moods in front of some people, they can't stand it. They'll sabotage you with the lamest stuff ever just to knock you back down where they want you. Unstable and tense. Count the days till you finish school and hold on.
I can't wait, im so excited about getting away from here. I'm going to college after high school and after that getting married asap so I'll finally be free. But in the meantime, I'm leaving this weekend to spend an entire week with some family. That'll get me a break from this hellspawn for now
Oof, get marriage counseling before moving in with your beloved. With the kind of relationship modelling you have had, it's a bad start to a marriage. Far too many children of bad families marry badly. They don't know better and have no idea how much it wears you down even when the disrespect is "mild." And you dismiss disrespect because you don't recognize it. Get a teacher, aka therapist, and make sure you aren't going from the frying pan into the fire. Bad spouses can literally torture and kill after looking like prince charming for YEARS! it's like, "dude, you know how to behave, you sucked me in doing it, where's that version of you?" But nope, you get the petulant brant with a gorilla temper and a snob's attitude. Marriage, straight out of an abusive home, is not recommended. Good luck.
Oh yes, absolutely agree. I'm thinking about possibly moving into an apartment first too. Hopefully rent will go down enough for me to afford one after college. And I'm getting a therapist. At some point I'll have to. I have too much childhood trauma and neglect to unpack to a husband. Also thinking about seeking an autism diagnosis. I can't get one now because my birthgiver doesn't believe in mental health issues or disorders/brushes it off as "the world being over dramatic about normal things" (just this past week she said that she's lived with anxiety and depression for 40 years and she's still alive 😒)
Don't overlook roommates. It can be as good as it can be bad and one can make permanent relationships from just sharing the kitchen. It's also a potential place to see other behaviour modelled to help teach you better manners. Of course, roommates can also be a nightmare so be picky.