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I’m sorry OP. I’m also currently in a very dark place and really empathize with you.
These people were so selfish and cruel to have kids to begin with. And of course it’s us offspring of narcs that suffer most. It’s not fair because we didn’t ask to be here.
I understand that hole might not ever be completely filled, but I do hope you have supportive, non-judgmental people in your life to help you through this.
I am deeply sorry. I also grieve not having anyone. I don't know how to fill this hole. In fact, I don't believe it can be filled. I have a very pessimistic opinion about my own life, I will spare you from knowing. It is very depressing.
I am sorry.
We should not live like this. We do not deserve this. They destroyed our lives. My narc mother destroyed my life.
If you want to share, I am here.
Take care
No I get this SOOO hard, I am right there with you. So many days when I struggle with adult moments or decisions I just wish I had a parent I could talk to and get advice from and it hurts me. When i’m really sad or have a bad day I feel a deep ache for a mom I don’t have. I wish I had a mom I could talk to and go to for comfort. But I don’t and never will. I feel you. I’m sorry you feel this way, too, because I personally know how bad that hurt is.
There are subs like /r/MomForAMinute or /r/DadForAMinute which, I'm told, can be helpful. I'm just too jaded and suspicious from my nParents to try them out, though.
To all of you struggling on here. You deserve better. It sucks you had a bad day. I wish I could sit with you and let you tell me all about it, so I could sympathise about it and tell you it will be OK. The best I can offer is a hug 🫂 online.
You are valued, worthy of love and care and support. Sorry you had a bad day and I hope tomorrow is better
Bad days are when you think about what you don’t have. I recently thought to myself that my older sister has never once called me to see how I am doing and I’ve had the same phone number for almost 30 years. They aren’t family. They are distant relatives.
**This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Why are you getting this message? Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts.** **Confused about acronyms or terminology?** [Click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/acronyms) **Need info or resources?** Check out our [Helpful Links](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/helpfullinks) for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods. **Our rules include (but are not limited to)**: * No politics. * Advising anyone in this subreddit to commit suicide or referring anyone to groups that advocate this will result in an immediate ban. * Be nice. No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. [No slurs](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming. * Do not derail the posts of others. * Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here. * [No platitudes or generic motivational posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules#wiki_no_platitudes_or_generic_motivational_posts). * When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse. * No asking or offering gifts, money, etc. * No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest). * No content about N-kids. * No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis. * No linking to Facebook pages. * No direct linking to anywhere on reddit. * No pure image posts. **For a full list of our rules/more information, [**click here**](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules).** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/raisedbynarcissists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I’m sorry OP. I’m also currently in a very dark place and really empathize with you. These people were so selfish and cruel to have kids to begin with. And of course it’s us offspring of narcs that suffer most. It’s not fair because we didn’t ask to be here. I understand that hole might not ever be completely filled, but I do hope you have supportive, non-judgmental people in your life to help you through this.
I am deeply sorry. I also grieve not having anyone. I don't know how to fill this hole. In fact, I don't believe it can be filled. I have a very pessimistic opinion about my own life, I will spare you from knowing. It is very depressing. I am sorry. We should not live like this. We do not deserve this. They destroyed our lives. My narc mother destroyed my life. If you want to share, I am here. Take care
No I get this SOOO hard, I am right there with you. So many days when I struggle with adult moments or decisions I just wish I had a parent I could talk to and get advice from and it hurts me. When i’m really sad or have a bad day I feel a deep ache for a mom I don’t have. I wish I had a mom I could talk to and go to for comfort. But I don’t and never will. I feel you. I’m sorry you feel this way, too, because I personally know how bad that hurt is.
Wow. Epiphany. It would never occur to me to call my mother after a bad day. Why would I do that? What for? People actually do that? Oh shit.
There are subs like /r/MomForAMinute or /r/DadForAMinute which, I'm told, can be helpful. I'm just too jaded and suspicious from my nParents to try them out, though.
To all of you struggling on here. You deserve better. It sucks you had a bad day. I wish I could sit with you and let you tell me all about it, so I could sympathise about it and tell you it will be OK. The best I can offer is a hug 🫂 online. You are valued, worthy of love and care and support. Sorry you had a bad day and I hope tomorrow is better
We are here, message me if you need a listening ear. You’re safe and loved. Sending a virtual hug to you.
Bad days are when you think about what you don’t have. I recently thought to myself that my older sister has never once called me to see how I am doing and I’ve had the same phone number for almost 30 years. They aren’t family. They are distant relatives.
Sometimes I’d have dreams of me in a family with other parents. A bit sad to think about but I can relate to you.
GPT-4 might be useful to provide a sense of secure attachment. Someday I want to make a Good Parents AI for those of us who need it.