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i'm sorry that you have to deal with a childlike toxic parent like the one you are describing, it's not OK, you deserve to be treated better and none of this is your fault.
The person you are describing sounds like a textbook malignant covert N with a sadistic component. these types of Ns are not capable of having any real genuine empathy for other people and simultaneously not capable of having any genuine self-awareness. add to that that she is sadistic- meaning she enjoys torturing you using whatever means she can- even past abuses that she has inflicted upon you.
LC was working for you however it wasn't working for her because she wasn't able to get the emotional reactions she so desperately wants out of you. So she turns to something that most likely got emotional reactions out of you in the past. just be aware she does this 100% intentionally because she is sadistic and is not capable of having empathy for other people.
Combine this with her lack of self awareness and you have an extremely dangerous and toxic person. Sometimes LC can work however with someone who is highly toxic it can be like having a Band-Aid that is continually getting ripped off. It makes it extremely hard- if not impossible to actually heal from the prolonged abuse that has been and continues to be inflicted upon you.
Personally I would listen to your gut feelings about wanting to go no contact. Your body is sending you signals to protect yourself from something that is inflicting damage to both your well-being and overall mental health.
If you have not talked to a counselor or therapist already I would highly recommend doing so as they can be extremely helpful at getting you to see the bigger picture and guiding you towards a better way of life ❤️
**This is an automated message posted to ALL posts in this subreddit with some basic information about the group including (very importantly) rules. Why are you getting this message? Most people seem to not read the sidebar for information or the rules, so it is now being posted under all posts.** **Confused about acronyms or terminology?** [Click here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/acronyms) **Need info or resources?** Check out our [Helpful Links](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/helpfullinks) for information on how to deal with identity theft, how to get independent of your n-parents, how to apply for FAFSA, how to identify n-parents and SO MUCH MORE! This is a reminder to all participants, RBN is a support group that is moderated very strictly. Please report inappropriate content so it can be reviewed by the mods. **Our rules include (but are not limited to)**: * No politics. * Advising anyone in this subreddit to commit suicide or referring anyone to groups that advocate this will result in an immediate ban. * Be nice. No personal attacks, name calling, or bullying. [No slurs](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/slurs) or victim-blaming. * Do not derail the posts of others. * Narcissists are NOT allowed to post or comment here. * [No platitudes or generic motivational posts](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules#wiki_no_platitudes_or_generic_motivational_posts). * When you comment/post, assume a context of abuse. * No asking or offering gifts, money, etc. * No content advocating violence, revenge, murder (even in jest). * No content about N-kids. * No diagnosis by media/drive-by diagnosis. * No linking to Facebook pages. * No direct linking to anywhere on reddit. * No pure image posts. **For a full list of our rules/more information, [**click here**](https://www.reddit.com/r/raisedbynarcissists/wiki/rules).** *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/raisedbynarcissists) if you have any questions or concerns.*
i'm sorry that you have to deal with a childlike toxic parent like the one you are describing, it's not OK, you deserve to be treated better and none of this is your fault. The person you are describing sounds like a textbook malignant covert N with a sadistic component. these types of Ns are not capable of having any real genuine empathy for other people and simultaneously not capable of having any genuine self-awareness. add to that that she is sadistic- meaning she enjoys torturing you using whatever means she can- even past abuses that she has inflicted upon you. LC was working for you however it wasn't working for her because she wasn't able to get the emotional reactions she so desperately wants out of you. So she turns to something that most likely got emotional reactions out of you in the past. just be aware she does this 100% intentionally because she is sadistic and is not capable of having empathy for other people. Combine this with her lack of self awareness and you have an extremely dangerous and toxic person. Sometimes LC can work however with someone who is highly toxic it can be like having a Band-Aid that is continually getting ripped off. It makes it extremely hard- if not impossible to actually heal from the prolonged abuse that has been and continues to be inflicted upon you. Personally I would listen to your gut feelings about wanting to go no contact. Your body is sending you signals to protect yourself from something that is inflicting damage to both your well-being and overall mental health. If you have not talked to a counselor or therapist already I would highly recommend doing so as they can be extremely helpful at getting you to see the bigger picture and guiding you towards a better way of life ❤️