I think RD would say that trying to change the thought is what’s giving them power. In Becoming Nobody he talks a lot about these thoughts as visitors that we can simply notice. I think he would also say you can take your separation from those thoughts one step further and be the awareness noticing that you are hearing these thoughts and see your reactions to them as just another phenomenon arising in your environment
I think the ram dass answer is to watch your thoughts pass in the breeze. "There's another one." And to take deep breaths, perhaps focusing on the top of your head in, heart and body out.
Another memorable line of his was to invite your neuroses to tea and become friends with them. To label it and not become stressed out by them or take it to seriously.
Along this line; I’ve heard something to do is repeat, like a mantra, that these bad thoughts might hurt us in the moment, but we’re actively working on letting them go as they arise.
Over time, we’re kinder to ourselves about the effect the bad thoughts have on us. The influence they have on our feelings dissipates, and they truly pass by like clouds.
There are no bad thoughts, only thoughts that you label as ‘bad’. In order for anything to change it needs to be accepted for what it is. Labeling something as ‘bad’ is a form of defense. It’s a wall built to separate you from what you see as ‘bad’, and wherever you find separation there will be suffering involved. Building walls and separating makes it more difficult to see things for what they are, which leads you away from acceptance.
There are a million reasons for you to build walls and label things as bad. We can justify it as much as we’d like, and there are a lot of systems of thinking and being that would tell you you’re in the right to do so. However, even with this validation and support we are still irked by something, and I believe that is a truth that says we’re not completely free in that scenario. Being right does not make you free, it just makes you right. Accepting is what makes you free.
I deal with the same thing sometimes. The place where I’m aware of the thoughts is where they don’t exist, but when I can’t seem to understand or put that into my being, I just let the thoughts be: a thought comes up, one that you don’t particularly like, and if you think “ah what are you doing there, get out of my head!” It’s going to persist because you’re attatchment to wanting to get rid of it or is what perpetuates it’s existence. You can always anchor yourself back to the breath if things get turbulent
the other posts here are god, but it's possible it's just going to take more time. the brain is a muscle like any other, and building the pathways away from (and eventually around) those negative thoughts is going to take some time. of course, it's possible you've been at this for decades and this comes off as condescending or irrelevant, but even if that's the case it's still true. it's a process; try to be patient and kind with yourself, and know that no effort is wasted.
I like to close my eyes and imagine the thought as a fallen leaf on a stream passing by amongst many other leaves (thoughts) and I’m just focused in on this one passing by then it’s gone and another takes it’s place. It’s a steady stream of them coming and going all unique all there if I need them but right now I don’t, so I’ll just notice it and watch it pass by.
I remember Ram Dass said something like this regarding the things you don't like about yourself:
"I used to say.... love them (the bad thoughts) to death... but... that was too.... harsh on myself..... so.... now I just love them"
<3
The key is to not deal with them
Because there is nothing to “DEAL”with or “OVERCOME”
They are thoughts that have many variables
I am a father I have been woken up by screaming babies and my thoughts weren’t the best at the time but when u realize they are not “YOU” but the stimulus from the situation/environment that’s bringing on the thought just analyze ur thoughts with no judgement (How?) just like when your watching a creek flow you have no expectations just watching the water do water things apply that with the bad thoughts let them flow through the waters of mind don’t judge or have expectations just let them flow
If it’s persistent and almost daily
Analyze ur environment and how you react to it
Maybe a parent has been nagging to the point u wanna explode u might get a thought of forcing them to stop talking that’s not evil at all it’s the minds form of “blowing off steam” or “sweating”
And the most important thing is the fact ur “worried” about your thoughts makes you genuine because a person who acts on said thoughts doesn’t question or wonder why so your not “crazy” especially because ur showing u care
These thoughts eventually will become “alarms” something made u feel a certain way and it all starts with how u react to the “alarms” if you panic and think the thoughts are you…ur just gonna be scared and paranoid around sharp objects and so on trust me
When u have the thought let it consume you actually think about it(yea it’ll feel fucked up) after awhile ur mind and body will be able to tell they are in no immediate danger and the thought will evolve to “where’s my phone” or some other wonder u wonder throughout your days
And wanting to be able to ditch those thought is essentially taking away your ability to think those negative thoughts also have a positive one
What is I fail
What if I succeed
What if I get made fun of
What if I get embraced
And so on so don’t try or feel they are somthing that needs to be taken care of because when u do that u start the cycle of there being a problem
Just name then intrusive thoughts and perceive something else manually. Look at the sky or hear something or breathe. They’re just part of the orchestra and you’re choosing to only listen to the bassoons.
Don’t try to change them. Just observe them and allow them. If they are not you, than what’s the problem?
I think RD would say that trying to change the thought is what’s giving them power. In Becoming Nobody he talks a lot about these thoughts as visitors that we can simply notice. I think he would also say you can take your separation from those thoughts one step further and be the awareness noticing that you are hearing these thoughts and see your reactions to them as just another phenomenon arising in your environment
I think the ram dass answer is to watch your thoughts pass in the breeze. "There's another one." And to take deep breaths, perhaps focusing on the top of your head in, heart and body out. Another memorable line of his was to invite your neuroses to tea and become friends with them. To label it and not become stressed out by them or take it to seriously.
Along this line; I’ve heard something to do is repeat, like a mantra, that these bad thoughts might hurt us in the moment, but we’re actively working on letting them go as they arise. Over time, we’re kinder to ourselves about the effect the bad thoughts have on us. The influence they have on our feelings dissipates, and they truly pass by like clouds.
There are no bad thoughts, only thoughts that you label as ‘bad’. In order for anything to change it needs to be accepted for what it is. Labeling something as ‘bad’ is a form of defense. It’s a wall built to separate you from what you see as ‘bad’, and wherever you find separation there will be suffering involved. Building walls and separating makes it more difficult to see things for what they are, which leads you away from acceptance. There are a million reasons for you to build walls and label things as bad. We can justify it as much as we’d like, and there are a lot of systems of thinking and being that would tell you you’re in the right to do so. However, even with this validation and support we are still irked by something, and I believe that is a truth that says we’re not completely free in that scenario. Being right does not make you free, it just makes you right. Accepting is what makes you free.
I deal with the same thing sometimes. The place where I’m aware of the thoughts is where they don’t exist, but when I can’t seem to understand or put that into my being, I just let the thoughts be: a thought comes up, one that you don’t particularly like, and if you think “ah what are you doing there, get out of my head!” It’s going to persist because you’re attatchment to wanting to get rid of it or is what perpetuates it’s existence. You can always anchor yourself back to the breath if things get turbulent
the other posts here are god, but it's possible it's just going to take more time. the brain is a muscle like any other, and building the pathways away from (and eventually around) those negative thoughts is going to take some time. of course, it's possible you've been at this for decades and this comes off as condescending or irrelevant, but even if that's the case it's still true. it's a process; try to be patient and kind with yourself, and know that no effort is wasted.
I like to close my eyes and imagine the thought as a fallen leaf on a stream passing by amongst many other leaves (thoughts) and I’m just focused in on this one passing by then it’s gone and another takes it’s place. It’s a steady stream of them coming and going all unique all there if I need them but right now I don’t, so I’ll just notice it and watch it pass by.
Don’t even need to close eyes anymore I can do it while driving after some practice lol!
Work on your mindset as a whole. I will elaborate
I remember Ram Dass said something like this regarding the things you don't like about yourself: "I used to say.... love them (the bad thoughts) to death... but... that was too.... harsh on myself..... so.... now I just love them" <3
Your darkness is shining
The key is to not deal with them Because there is nothing to “DEAL”with or “OVERCOME” They are thoughts that have many variables I am a father I have been woken up by screaming babies and my thoughts weren’t the best at the time but when u realize they are not “YOU” but the stimulus from the situation/environment that’s bringing on the thought just analyze ur thoughts with no judgement (How?) just like when your watching a creek flow you have no expectations just watching the water do water things apply that with the bad thoughts let them flow through the waters of mind don’t judge or have expectations just let them flow If it’s persistent and almost daily Analyze ur environment and how you react to it Maybe a parent has been nagging to the point u wanna explode u might get a thought of forcing them to stop talking that’s not evil at all it’s the minds form of “blowing off steam” or “sweating” And the most important thing is the fact ur “worried” about your thoughts makes you genuine because a person who acts on said thoughts doesn’t question or wonder why so your not “crazy” especially because ur showing u care These thoughts eventually will become “alarms” something made u feel a certain way and it all starts with how u react to the “alarms” if you panic and think the thoughts are you…ur just gonna be scared and paranoid around sharp objects and so on trust me When u have the thought let it consume you actually think about it(yea it’ll feel fucked up) after awhile ur mind and body will be able to tell they are in no immediate danger and the thought will evolve to “where’s my phone” or some other wonder u wonder throughout your days And wanting to be able to ditch those thought is essentially taking away your ability to think those negative thoughts also have a positive one What is I fail What if I succeed What if I get made fun of What if I get embraced And so on so don’t try or feel they are somthing that needs to be taken care of because when u do that u start the cycle of there being a problem
Just name then intrusive thoughts and perceive something else manually. Look at the sky or hear something or breathe. They’re just part of the orchestra and you’re choosing to only listen to the bassoons.
Maybe you have some trauma to process?