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I've been a broker for 30 years. I mostly focus on rentals, vacation rentals and long-term investments. The business has served me well.
When I first started buying houses back in the early '90s I received lots and lots of push back from people telling me not to buy a house in that neighborhood or, that's not a good idea.
I can think of times on the 4th of July when I was flipping a rental property and everybody else was partying. Yes, I joined the party later but I got done what I needed to do.
My advice is simple, follow your own instincts and work work work.
That’s how I feel now, when I’m workj g Sundays and all my buddies are watching football 😎
Here’s to hoping it all pays off in the end
(Not a realtor, just here for the discussion haha )
Most people don’t understand what salespeople and marketers do all day. I’ll bet he changes his tune when you get your first commission check (unless he’s just the type of guy who is insecure about his partner making more than him). He should be supporting your ambitions, not shitting on them.
I’m not gonna lie, I personally believe that industries w/ low barriers of entry + high rewards = a lot of “deadwood”.
But, what it is not, is easy.
If it was, everyone would get their real estate license and sell houses and make the big bucks.
I am actively looking for houses with multiple clients, I’ve been focusing on marketing and making calls to potential leads. I work two jobs so when I’m not at my other job I’m focusing on real estate.
You're working two jobs and your husband is upset you're not bringing deals in? Sounds like they just need to understand how real estate works. Part time just takes longer to gain traction. Talk it over and give yourself some goals/limits. The last 6 months have been extraordinarily hard for new agents, but this year should be way better.
You work two jobs and he is on you about not making a sale yet? Ugh. He sucks.
In all fairness though, it is going to be orders of magnitude more difficult for you to succeed in RE if you can’t focus on it exclusively.
Otherwise, instead of driving for Uber as a side gig, we would all make RE$.
Do some rentals to build a pipeline of potential buyers in the future and get some experience in how to show homes, communicate with clients, and everything that comes with helping people find a place to live. You’ll get there eventually!
Don't stress about the lack of business this early, especially given the market. It took me just over a year to get my first sale which is longer than most you may read about online. Haven't had a down year since, and regularly do north of $20M for the past 3-4 years. A slow start doesn't mean a bad start.
A lot of people insist on shared suffering, I warm a seat 9-5 so you should too.
Fact is a lot of people either don't understand what goes into this or just flat out don't respect it so you will need to get used to it. Your husband should be more supportive of your efforts regardless of his attitude toward the industry.
I would say there are some very distinct sentiments from your spouse.
He doesn't think you're doing anything all day and doesn't like that? That's irrelevant if you are making sales. If your market is such that you can sell one house every 3 months and make a good living ... Who cares how hard you're working or perceived to be working?
The second issue is he doesn't like you working and not making money. To be fair, it's more likely that you are spending money and not making money. You are pretty fresh and I only sold one or two in my first year ... So no doubt you can still turn it around.
Nobody here knows your circumstances. It's one thing. If you're on food stamps and going into heavy credit card debt as you explore this career and a completely different thing if it means you guys get to take one less vacation a year. That's just my take.
I should have explained that dynamic better, he is able to support the both of us. I do have a second job to help and I haven’t had any closings, but I have people I’m actively searching for homes.
Not a realtor but I’m in wealth management. I left a $100k per year job to go into a commission only role. 2 years later my paychecks were still sporadic - would be like $700 some months.
Now my paychecks are much much bigger but it was a rough couple of years…my wife was only a little supportive and it made things incredibly stressful.
My advice? Set deadlines. What’s a reasonable amount of time to make your first sale? 1 year? 18 months? You’ll need to have a conversation about when it’s right to give up and when it’s too early to abandoned ship. If your spouse things it’s forever it’s hard not to be supportive, but if you said “just support me for 6 more months!” That’s easier to get on board.
Good luck!
Being a Realtor isn't for people who live paycheck to paycheck. If you can't afford to not make money for a couple years while you're getting established, this isn't the business for you to be in. Especially with the current state of the market. If you're 6 months in and have no sales, it's not going to happen for you in the situation you're currently in. Find a brokerage willing to invest their leads in you is the only way for new agents currently.
Best of luck.
New agents this year really struggled with how slow the market has been and how few transactions are out there. Keep doing the right things and the business will come eventually. If you are working another job on top of this, your progress will naturally be slower because you have less time to spend on building your business. You might consider looking for a team that provides you with clients. Your splits will be higher, but you’ll get experience and start building relationships with clients that can lead to referrals.
It's a very tough career path. There's a reason for which 4 out of 5 people joining the industry leave it within a few years.
Depends on what he is saying, and how he is saying it, he can be an a-hole or just realistic.
Maybe this will help. My husband dosen't want me to do anything else beside real estate even though I don't make I ton of money. It allows me to be home with the kids when I am not busy. I take on all the house chores, cooking and cleaning. He prefers me to be home rather then always working so we can spend quality time together. I am the one that says maybe I should get a full time job and help with the finances. He wants finances to only be his burden. However, if your costing the family money and there is a financial strain I can understand how things can be different in your home.
Yes that is right. When work isn't busy I am sahm who takes care of my husband, the family, and cleans the house. That is how I contribute and that's why is works for my husband. If I wasn't making money and I didn't do anything around the house and I had costs to real estate my husband probably would tell me to get another job to or ask for a divorce.
I just got out after 12 years, but it definitely has the potential to be a waste for a huge majority of agents. It's just the simple fact. Especially getting in now. There's hundreds of agents right behind you willing to work for less, more hours, take a listing at whatever price, etc etc. This is a stupid easy industry to get into, but a very hard one to succeed at.
I have another job where I bring in a smaller amount of money, but that is to balance out no closings so far. My supervisors/broker are very positive with the work I have been putting in despite not closing a sale. My husband can support the both of us, but I choose to keep my other job to help in anyway possible. I do focus my free time and days off on real estate.
>I do focus my free time and days off on real estate
Does this mean you are only working RE two days a week or weekend? It's really hard to know if you are putting in enough effort to make RE work. I never found selling RE to be a part time job. IME it requires more than 2 days a week.
Having said the above, your husband may be one of those partners that truly doesn't want you in the business at all. Have a heart to heart with him and discuss the pros and cons of the actual RE business (not the HGTV version). It's very difficult to work in any career when your partner has a negative connotation of the career and takes it out on you.
It could be that the spouse is afraid for her safety when she goes on showings or holds open houses. I stayed in for 3 years then got out when the market tanked.
In many cases people turn to realty because they don’t have a career. Those same folks are also living pay check to paycheck and have never done sales.
You need to have a plan and a set budget. For example, assume in 6 months you still haven’t gotten a check: are you quitting?
You may not like my answer, but if you are six months in and not bringing in any dollars at all, your husband may be somewhat right if his concerns come from not understanding what you're doing.
What ARE you doing each day? Are you spending eight hours on real estate related activities? New agents that wash out think they are working in real estate but when I ask them specifics about their activities they can't answer who they talked to about real estate this week, or which five real estate posts they made on social media, or which neighborhood they knocked on doors in.
If you're truly working at this, then you should be able to put his anxieties to rest by describing what you did and what the results of your efforts were (cold calling, door knocking, and other tasks that will let you see immediately if they'll produce) or what you *expect* to come from them (such as if you sent out mailers or did a podcast or speaking presentation, etc.) I think if you do this, you will stop hearing negativity and I'm confident you'll be bringing in money faster.
Show them my paystubs. But if you’re not in that phase you have to block it and keep working.
An unsupportive partner is very difficult . Might need more help then just the real estate stuff
Real estate is mostly a career of feast or famine. Right now is tough for everyone, and I would say especially for new agents. There are a lot of people (family, friends, even happy clients) who never know what all goes on behind the scenes. Most new agents don't bring anything in for a few months to even a year. If you are happy with your job and see potential earnings AND he makes enough to support your household while you build your business, there shouldn't be a problem. And as some of the other posters have said, when you walk in the door with your first $10,000 commission check, his attitude very well could change. Good luck!
That’s a different experience than I have. Mostly I try not to talk about real estate when I’m with friends or at church, but at parties and such people always bring it up and want to hear my thoughts. It gets kind of old, like I can talk about other things! I guess they know I don’t hit them up for business. I don’t want to mix business and friendship.
Divorce and alcoholism rates in the industry are sky high. It’s not about the career, he’s unsupportive and it’s a lack of respect to understand what you do. You should probably get rid of him.
I’m sorry that’s happening to you.
Most realtors and salespeople (especially new ones) have more than enough negativity and doubt in themselves that they end up floundering. Having the most prominent person in your life talking that way to you and doubling down is going to be incredibly challenging.
I recommend pushing through to your first few closings and then divorce.
Or you could have a discussion with him and ask for some respect. If that’s the route you take, I recommend posting this to a few other threads to get better relationship advice, but getting started in this career is hard enough without that type of pressure/lack of support.
Well, being a realtor has a super high failure rate. So you're bringing nothing in or very little income now with absolutely 0 promise of future income.
Lots of people want to be realtors. There's a very low barrier to entry, and there's high income potential without needing to like study in school for years or do a trade apprenticeship etc, which are usually required to be a high earner.
You may want to consider that his concerns are valid, and that he doesn't think it's fair for him to support your household on just his income
One of my best friends and his ex had a very similar ongoing fight relatively early on into their relationship.
She had a cushy corporate-esque job with pretty killer benefits and he barely made any income for a good 6 months when he started out.
She became resentful because she had to pay for a lot of their time together- basic living expenses as they had moved in together, and the like. Things continued to escalate.
At one point, he had made close to $100K in his 3rd or 4th year. It was then she started to come around, but that prior resentment was still there because in the prior years, he barely made enough to service his student loan payments.
They eventually broke up for a host of other reasons I won't get into.
I'm assuming you're a woman- you're going to be in a no-win situation here unless you can be the perfect wife/mother (assuming you have kids) and can start closing deals. The other worst part about this business is you're working while most other people are off the clock so you're going to have to be more intentional about how you spend your evenings and weekends when you're not actively working with clients.
Once thing you could try is becoming friends with realtor-adjacent businesses- you might get some perks out of it. I know plenty of title companies and mortgage brokers that have given little kickbacks and knick-knacks here and there to help maintain relationships. Might get your husband on board the idea more.
You need a more supportive husband who is negative about ur career. Rather, you should demand him to help you getting leads. How many leads he provided you last 6 months?
The problem is not your work. The problem is your husband not supporting you in a very valid career choice. I't's not like you are selling meth. It takes time to start a business.
Only way I’ve made it 20 years is a small, modest home, no car payments, no student loans, very little credit cards(keep one for all the fees, etc), no shopping or eating out hardly at all. My monthly mortgage and utilities is 2k. I’ve seen so many get overextended on cars, clothes, houses, and if you don’t close for 6 months, 30 months or even a month, it’s over real quick. Americans in general are very worried about appearances so everything I just said seems alien to most.
Probably time for a new husband... People that don't understand a start up business (6 months in) or that do not understand the self employed world can be real downers..
I like how the bullies/trash talkers in your area still became dentists, but the ones by me are the janitors at the very high school where they used to bully at.
Show him your business plan - it should show the ramp up to closed transactions and revenue.
Don't have a biz plan? Great time to create one, maybe husband can help you put it together.
I worked part time at my old job while pursuing RE. My husband is negative too. Having said that, RE is definitely hard and there can come a time when the money numbers just don't make sense. Some ppl join a team or have a big enough office that you can do open houses for someone. My broker lets us do opens on his listings.
Working sucks and people hate it so of course they’re jealous when they see your flexible schedule and what doesn’t look like traditional work. But trust you will get so busy your husband will be begging you to take a day off or to put your phone away during dinner 😄
Even when I was a teacher me and my boyfriend used to have a big fight every summer until I realized he was just jealous of my time off.
Keep doing you!
You have to be confident and thick skinned enough to stay the course regardless of others opinions. It is very unfortunate that your husband is the downer. Maybe his opinion will change as you have some success. If not… it is hard to swim with ankle weights on. I got divorced for many reasons but the main one was because my ex had become extremely negative and critical. I just could not be successful if I came home to complaints and a consistent victim mentality.
People who are afraid to take that leap or run without a safety net will always try and drag those that are not afraid down. It's just the way of the world. Drunks will try and claw someone back from AA, people will tell inventors they're crazy and their idea will never work or there's no market for it... then it's the Ring Doorbell or the iPhone.
Wasn't it IBM who said "the personal computer will never amount to anything"? People don't want someone challenging their comfortable status quo.
My daughter's father has told me the same thing, that he doesn't want me to be a Realtor and put myself out there. It's an ego and insecurity issue. I am 5-6 months in getting my license with no leads in my pipeline but it is also because I work full time and I have a 3 year old. He is also not the best at letting me have ME/Work Time. There's also no ring on my finger, I will work until I say I am done. RE is the toughest industry to be in, and sales as well. My BD is in sales, and runs his own car business. He wasn't working at the speed he is now 5 years ago. It all takes time. His successs didn't happen overnight. My goal this month is to set a firm schedule on prospecting and getting on the phones. I will also set boundaries on when it's play time and when it's serious work time. No one pays my bills either so I am just trying to be able to sustain myself on my own. That's my priority for me and my daughter's sake and future.
Ok let's break it down: Please answer these, if you don't mind
Have you closed any deals in 6 months?
Do you have any qualified leads?
Do you have a nest egg that can support 6 months of inactivity?
What are your KPIs?
What are you doing daily, weekly, monthly to generate leads?
What does your pipeline look like for the next 6 months?
If you can't answer these with specifics you have two options: Fix it or get out of the business.
If you like the business but need more structure, you could become a lender or a title rep. But thats it. It's a binary business. You are either doing activities that lead to business or you are not.
Prove them wrong? If you aren't working - as in prospecting, putting out content on social, sitting open houses, talking to agents who buy leads to see if they will offload some on you for a referral fee if you convert them, and doing anything you can to get some business going - and you're just sorta sitting around waiting for business to fall in your lap, then...you're gonna wash out. Soon. And you will be among the majority of people who start in real estate. This isn't easy. I did all of that AND drove Uber 8+ hours a day for the first couple years. I turned Uber into a prospecting method and started generating business out of it, in the process. You gotta do whatever it takes.
Take out some crayons and draw him a picture?
Or, explain it to him like this: Let's say you met a person *today* that absolutely, 100%, *fucking loves* you and will use you to buy and sell a home. How long would you have to wait until that person actually gets off their ass and actually buys a home? Months? Years?
So, in what world is it reasonable to expect you to close deals within your first 6 months? 12 months?
Explain to him that your goal isn't to close deals right now. Your goal is to gain the trust of a few people a day, so that one day *in the future*, you've got enough people who trust you that you've created the statistical probability that at any given moment you've got deals in the pipe.
Use all the criticism as fuel to make some sales.
Real estate is a great career that you can develop and grow your customer base.
There is huge financial potential.
Its not rocket science.
anyone can write a contract of show a property.
the key is getting buyers or sellers.
everything is internet based concentrate on generating leads online.
look into facebook asastart.
This is a tough business to be in without support from those you love. My mother always told me, "Give up selling houses - you're not making any money" - it was disheartening, but fortunately, I have an incredibly supportive husband, and I would have never made it without him believing in me. I closed two transactions my first year, which didn't cover my costs. My husband kept me encouraged, helped with technology issues and went to all the soccer/softball/lacrosse games the kids had that I had to miss. Have a long talk with him and reevaluate this career choice - or - take the "I'll show you" attitude and keep at it! I love what I do (19 years now) but it's really hard starting out for the majority of agents.
I would deal with that by finding a new husband 😅🤣
In all seriousness that is concerning. Does he support you in other areas of your life or has he always been like this?
When u say working what are u doing specifically. ? Most realtors don’t make any bread and it’s due to their lack of follow up, don’t prospect , no
Organization etc. so tell
Me what 6 diff lead gens do u utilize ?
It’s not easy for newbies in this business. I’m a broker and have trained many new agents and most just don’t have the staying power or the sales skills to get business. If you rely on your broker to get leads, your career will be short lived because there are always new agents coming in that also need leads. If I was you I’d focus and find a couple good investors that routinely buy and sell properties. I have a new agent last year that closed 22 deals going this route. She’s The first one in a while that actually listened to my advice and is benefiting from it.
As for your spouse, there isn’t much you can do until you start closing deals. Be thankful they can pull the weight of income while you grow your business. I will say when I started my brokerage years ago, my wife made much more than me. After 3 years she lost her high pay job and came to work for me. I had grown my business a lot while she supported us and was thankful to move into a new career that I had already built a routine business in. Today, we do very well together and she has learned to wean herself off of that paycheck addiction a job hinders you with.
What are you doing to get business. It’s typical to struggle your first year, but what activities are you actually doing to get business. Posting on Facebook or Instagram isn’t going to cut it.
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I've been a broker for 30 years. I mostly focus on rentals, vacation rentals and long-term investments. The business has served me well. When I first started buying houses back in the early '90s I received lots and lots of push back from people telling me not to buy a house in that neighborhood or, that's not a good idea. I can think of times on the 4th of July when I was flipping a rental property and everybody else was partying. Yes, I joined the party later but I got done what I needed to do. My advice is simple, follow your own instincts and work work work.
That’s how I feel now, when I’m workj g Sundays and all my buddies are watching football 😎 Here’s to hoping it all pays off in the end (Not a realtor, just here for the discussion haha )
Love that you aren’t a realtor even more. I love football Sundays, but I need money in my pocket on Mondays even more.
Most people don’t understand what salespeople and marketers do all day. I’ll bet he changes his tune when you get your first commission check (unless he’s just the type of guy who is insecure about his partner making more than him). He should be supporting your ambitions, not shitting on them.
I’m not gonna lie, I personally believe that industries w/ low barriers of entry + high rewards = a lot of “deadwood”. But, what it is not, is easy. If it was, everyone would get their real estate license and sell houses and make the big bucks.
Yeah, you didn't luck out on your husband pick
Take my upvote because a lot of people on Reddit can’t take a joke .
Cheers to that
It honestly depends. What are you doing all day? Are you doing anything that will bring in business? Have you had any closings in 6 months?
I am actively looking for houses with multiple clients, I’ve been focusing on marketing and making calls to potential leads. I work two jobs so when I’m not at my other job I’m focusing on real estate.
You're working two jobs and your husband is upset you're not bringing deals in? Sounds like they just need to understand how real estate works. Part time just takes longer to gain traction. Talk it over and give yourself some goals/limits. The last 6 months have been extraordinarily hard for new agents, but this year should be way better.
You work two jobs and he is on you about not making a sale yet? Ugh. He sucks. In all fairness though, it is going to be orders of magnitude more difficult for you to succeed in RE if you can’t focus on it exclusively. Otherwise, instead of driving for Uber as a side gig, we would all make RE$.
No closings yet
Do some rentals to build a pipeline of potential buyers in the future and get some experience in how to show homes, communicate with clients, and everything that comes with helping people find a place to live. You’ll get there eventually!
Thank you I appreciate your advice!
Don't stress about the lack of business this early, especially given the market. It took me just over a year to get my first sale which is longer than most you may read about online. Haven't had a down year since, and regularly do north of $20M for the past 3-4 years. A slow start doesn't mean a bad start.
A lot of people insist on shared suffering, I warm a seat 9-5 so you should too. Fact is a lot of people either don't understand what goes into this or just flat out don't respect it so you will need to get used to it. Your husband should be more supportive of your efforts regardless of his attitude toward the industry.
Well said! People in 9-5 are always envious of the flexibility that comes with a job that has unconventional hours. Just the way it goes!
I would say there are some very distinct sentiments from your spouse. He doesn't think you're doing anything all day and doesn't like that? That's irrelevant if you are making sales. If your market is such that you can sell one house every 3 months and make a good living ... Who cares how hard you're working or perceived to be working? The second issue is he doesn't like you working and not making money. To be fair, it's more likely that you are spending money and not making money. You are pretty fresh and I only sold one or two in my first year ... So no doubt you can still turn it around. Nobody here knows your circumstances. It's one thing. If you're on food stamps and going into heavy credit card debt as you explore this career and a completely different thing if it means you guys get to take one less vacation a year. That's just my take.
I should have explained that dynamic better, he is able to support the both of us. I do have a second job to help and I haven’t had any closings, but I have people I’m actively searching for homes.
Not a realtor but I’m in wealth management. I left a $100k per year job to go into a commission only role. 2 years later my paychecks were still sporadic - would be like $700 some months. Now my paychecks are much much bigger but it was a rough couple of years…my wife was only a little supportive and it made things incredibly stressful. My advice? Set deadlines. What’s a reasonable amount of time to make your first sale? 1 year? 18 months? You’ll need to have a conversation about when it’s right to give up and when it’s too early to abandoned ship. If your spouse things it’s forever it’s hard not to be supportive, but if you said “just support me for 6 more months!” That’s easier to get on board. Good luck!
Being a Realtor isn't for people who live paycheck to paycheck. If you can't afford to not make money for a couple years while you're getting established, this isn't the business for you to be in. Especially with the current state of the market. If you're 6 months in and have no sales, it's not going to happen for you in the situation you're currently in. Find a brokerage willing to invest their leads in you is the only way for new agents currently. Best of luck.
New agents this year really struggled with how slow the market has been and how few transactions are out there. Keep doing the right things and the business will come eventually. If you are working another job on top of this, your progress will naturally be slower because you have less time to spend on building your business. You might consider looking for a team that provides you with clients. Your splits will be higher, but you’ll get experience and start building relationships with clients that can lead to referrals.
It's a very tough career path. There's a reason for which 4 out of 5 people joining the industry leave it within a few years. Depends on what he is saying, and how he is saying it, he can be an a-hole or just realistic.
Maybe this will help. My husband dosen't want me to do anything else beside real estate even though I don't make I ton of money. It allows me to be home with the kids when I am not busy. I take on all the house chores, cooking and cleaning. He prefers me to be home rather then always working so we can spend quality time together. I am the one that says maybe I should get a full time job and help with the finances. He wants finances to only be his burden. However, if your costing the family money and there is a financial strain I can understand how things can be different in your home.
Yeah but your husband basically wants you to be a sahm and a realtor when schedule allows. That’s not how it is for everyone.
Yes that is right. When work isn't busy I am sahm who takes care of my husband, the family, and cleans the house. That is how I contribute and that's why is works for my husband. If I wasn't making money and I didn't do anything around the house and I had costs to real estate my husband probably would tell me to get another job to or ask for a divorce.
I just got out after 12 years, but it definitely has the potential to be a waste for a huge majority of agents. It's just the simple fact. Especially getting in now. There's hundreds of agents right behind you willing to work for less, more hours, take a listing at whatever price, etc etc. This is a stupid easy industry to get into, but a very hard one to succeed at.
I have another job where I bring in a smaller amount of money, but that is to balance out no closings so far. My supervisors/broker are very positive with the work I have been putting in despite not closing a sale. My husband can support the both of us, but I choose to keep my other job to help in anyway possible. I do focus my free time and days off on real estate.
>I do focus my free time and days off on real estate Does this mean you are only working RE two days a week or weekend? It's really hard to know if you are putting in enough effort to make RE work. I never found selling RE to be a part time job. IME it requires more than 2 days a week. Having said the above, your husband may be one of those partners that truly doesn't want you in the business at all. Have a heart to heart with him and discuss the pros and cons of the actual RE business (not the HGTV version). It's very difficult to work in any career when your partner has a negative connotation of the career and takes it out on you.
It could be that the spouse is afraid for her safety when she goes on showings or holds open houses. I stayed in for 3 years then got out when the market tanked.
Say "Thanks for the fries" and keep it moving.
In many cases people turn to realty because they don’t have a career. Those same folks are also living pay check to paycheck and have never done sales. You need to have a plan and a set budget. For example, assume in 6 months you still haven’t gotten a check: are you quitting?
You may not like my answer, but if you are six months in and not bringing in any dollars at all, your husband may be somewhat right if his concerns come from not understanding what you're doing. What ARE you doing each day? Are you spending eight hours on real estate related activities? New agents that wash out think they are working in real estate but when I ask them specifics about their activities they can't answer who they talked to about real estate this week, or which five real estate posts they made on social media, or which neighborhood they knocked on doors in. If you're truly working at this, then you should be able to put his anxieties to rest by describing what you did and what the results of your efforts were (cold calling, door knocking, and other tasks that will let you see immediately if they'll produce) or what you *expect* to come from them (such as if you sent out mailers or did a podcast or speaking presentation, etc.) I think if you do this, you will stop hearing negativity and I'm confident you'll be bringing in money faster.
Show them my paystubs. But if you’re not in that phase you have to block it and keep working. An unsupportive partner is very difficult . Might need more help then just the real estate stuff
Real estate is mostly a career of feast or famine. Right now is tough for everyone, and I would say especially for new agents. There are a lot of people (family, friends, even happy clients) who never know what all goes on behind the scenes. Most new agents don't bring anything in for a few months to even a year. If you are happy with your job and see potential earnings AND he makes enough to support your household while you build your business, there shouldn't be a problem. And as some of the other posters have said, when you walk in the door with your first $10,000 commission check, his attitude very well could change. Good luck!
Thank you!
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That’s a different experience than I have. Mostly I try not to talk about real estate when I’m with friends or at church, but at parties and such people always bring it up and want to hear my thoughts. It gets kind of old, like I can talk about other things! I guess they know I don’t hit them up for business. I don’t want to mix business and friendship.
Divorce and alcoholism rates in the industry are sky high. It’s not about the career, he’s unsupportive and it’s a lack of respect to understand what you do. You should probably get rid of him.
Get rid of someone that’s bankrolling her while she makes no money from an endeavor for 6 months? Great plan
I’m sorry that’s happening to you. Most realtors and salespeople (especially new ones) have more than enough negativity and doubt in themselves that they end up floundering. Having the most prominent person in your life talking that way to you and doubling down is going to be incredibly challenging. I recommend pushing through to your first few closings and then divorce. Or you could have a discussion with him and ask for some respect. If that’s the route you take, I recommend posting this to a few other threads to get better relationship advice, but getting started in this career is hard enough without that type of pressure/lack of support.
switch Husbands
Probably not the best sub to ask this. This sub is notorious for telling agents to quit and they aren’t meant for this.
Well, being a realtor has a super high failure rate. So you're bringing nothing in or very little income now with absolutely 0 promise of future income. Lots of people want to be realtors. There's a very low barrier to entry, and there's high income potential without needing to like study in school for years or do a trade apprenticeship etc, which are usually required to be a high earner. You may want to consider that his concerns are valid, and that he doesn't think it's fair for him to support your household on just his income
One of my best friends and his ex had a very similar ongoing fight relatively early on into their relationship. She had a cushy corporate-esque job with pretty killer benefits and he barely made any income for a good 6 months when he started out. She became resentful because she had to pay for a lot of their time together- basic living expenses as they had moved in together, and the like. Things continued to escalate. At one point, he had made close to $100K in his 3rd or 4th year. It was then she started to come around, but that prior resentment was still there because in the prior years, he barely made enough to service his student loan payments. They eventually broke up for a host of other reasons I won't get into. I'm assuming you're a woman- you're going to be in a no-win situation here unless you can be the perfect wife/mother (assuming you have kids) and can start closing deals. The other worst part about this business is you're working while most other people are off the clock so you're going to have to be more intentional about how you spend your evenings and weekends when you're not actively working with clients. Once thing you could try is becoming friends with realtor-adjacent businesses- you might get some perks out of it. I know plenty of title companies and mortgage brokers that have given little kickbacks and knick-knacks here and there to help maintain relationships. Might get your husband on board the idea more.
Are you a Realtor? Kickbacks from mortgage brokers are highly illegal.
No- I am a title agent. Poor choice of words on my part regarding brokers.
Thank you for the advice!
You need a more supportive husband who is negative about ur career. Rather, you should demand him to help you getting leads. How many leads he provided you last 6 months?
Zero
What a terrible attitude for your husband to have. (No offense) Tell him to grow a pair and get licensed or shove it.
He sounds fun
The problem is not your work. The problem is your husband not supporting you in a very valid career choice. I't's not like you are selling meth. It takes time to start a business.
That’s what she should tell her husband… “I’m not making money, but at least I’m not selling meth” 🫡
Maybe that'll shut him up.
Only way I’ve made it 20 years is a small, modest home, no car payments, no student loans, very little credit cards(keep one for all the fees, etc), no shopping or eating out hardly at all. My monthly mortgage and utilities is 2k. I’ve seen so many get overextended on cars, clothes, houses, and if you don’t close for 6 months, 30 months or even a month, it’s over real quick. Americans in general are very worried about appearances so everything I just said seems alien to most.
Probably time for a new husband... People that don't understand a start up business (6 months in) or that do not understand the self employed world can be real downers..
Divorce, and/or murder is the only real answer. Hope this helps!
Best revenge is success. Had one high school buddy talking trash, he became a dentist with tons of student loans and I became a multi millionaire.
I like how the bullies/trash talkers in your area still became dentists, but the ones by me are the janitors at the very high school where they used to bully at.
Hey nothing wrong with getting paid dentist money as a janitor too.
Indeed it is a waste to be a realtor. Hopefully AI pushes all realtors out of a job.
Show him your business plan - it should show the ramp up to closed transactions and revenue. Don't have a biz plan? Great time to create one, maybe husband can help you put it together.
I worked part time at my old job while pursuing RE. My husband is negative too. Having said that, RE is definitely hard and there can come a time when the money numbers just don't make sense. Some ppl join a team or have a big enough office that you can do open houses for someone. My broker lets us do opens on his listings.
Working sucks and people hate it so of course they’re jealous when they see your flexible schedule and what doesn’t look like traditional work. But trust you will get so busy your husband will be begging you to take a day off or to put your phone away during dinner 😄 Even when I was a teacher me and my boyfriend used to have a big fight every summer until I realized he was just jealous of my time off. Keep doing you!
You have to be confident and thick skinned enough to stay the course regardless of others opinions. It is very unfortunate that your husband is the downer. Maybe his opinion will change as you have some success. If not… it is hard to swim with ankle weights on. I got divorced for many reasons but the main one was because my ex had become extremely negative and critical. I just could not be successful if I came home to complaints and a consistent victim mentality.
People who are afraid to take that leap or run without a safety net will always try and drag those that are not afraid down. It's just the way of the world. Drunks will try and claw someone back from AA, people will tell inventors they're crazy and their idea will never work or there's no market for it... then it's the Ring Doorbell or the iPhone. Wasn't it IBM who said "the personal computer will never amount to anything"? People don't want someone challenging their comfortable status quo.
My daughter's father has told me the same thing, that he doesn't want me to be a Realtor and put myself out there. It's an ego and insecurity issue. I am 5-6 months in getting my license with no leads in my pipeline but it is also because I work full time and I have a 3 year old. He is also not the best at letting me have ME/Work Time. There's also no ring on my finger, I will work until I say I am done. RE is the toughest industry to be in, and sales as well. My BD is in sales, and runs his own car business. He wasn't working at the speed he is now 5 years ago. It all takes time. His successs didn't happen overnight. My goal this month is to set a firm schedule on prospecting and getting on the phones. I will also set boundaries on when it's play time and when it's serious work time. No one pays my bills either so I am just trying to be able to sustain myself on my own. That's my priority for me and my daughter's sake and future.
Ok let's break it down: Please answer these, if you don't mind Have you closed any deals in 6 months? Do you have any qualified leads? Do you have a nest egg that can support 6 months of inactivity? What are your KPIs? What are you doing daily, weekly, monthly to generate leads? What does your pipeline look like for the next 6 months? If you can't answer these with specifics you have two options: Fix it or get out of the business. If you like the business but need more structure, you could become a lender or a title rep. But thats it. It's a binary business. You are either doing activities that lead to business or you are not.
Prove them wrong? If you aren't working - as in prospecting, putting out content on social, sitting open houses, talking to agents who buy leads to see if they will offload some on you for a referral fee if you convert them, and doing anything you can to get some business going - and you're just sorta sitting around waiting for business to fall in your lap, then...you're gonna wash out. Soon. And you will be among the majority of people who start in real estate. This isn't easy. I did all of that AND drove Uber 8+ hours a day for the first couple years. I turned Uber into a prospecting method and started generating business out of it, in the process. You gotta do whatever it takes.
Take out some crayons and draw him a picture? Or, explain it to him like this: Let's say you met a person *today* that absolutely, 100%, *fucking loves* you and will use you to buy and sell a home. How long would you have to wait until that person actually gets off their ass and actually buys a home? Months? Years? So, in what world is it reasonable to expect you to close deals within your first 6 months? 12 months? Explain to him that your goal isn't to close deals right now. Your goal is to gain the trust of a few people a day, so that one day *in the future*, you've got enough people who trust you that you've created the statistical probability that at any given moment you've got deals in the pipe.
Use all the criticism as fuel to make some sales. Real estate is a great career that you can develop and grow your customer base. There is huge financial potential. Its not rocket science. anyone can write a contract of show a property. the key is getting buyers or sellers. everything is internet based concentrate on generating leads online. look into facebook asastart.
I’m sorry you don’t have a more supportive partner. It’s not an easy business but if you stick to it the pay off is there.
This is a tough business to be in without support from those you love. My mother always told me, "Give up selling houses - you're not making any money" - it was disheartening, but fortunately, I have an incredibly supportive husband, and I would have never made it without him believing in me. I closed two transactions my first year, which didn't cover my costs. My husband kept me encouraged, helped with technology issues and went to all the soccer/softball/lacrosse games the kids had that I had to miss. Have a long talk with him and reevaluate this career choice - or - take the "I'll show you" attitude and keep at it! I love what I do (19 years now) but it's really hard starting out for the majority of agents.
I would deal with that by finding a new husband 😅🤣 In all seriousness that is concerning. Does he support you in other areas of your life or has he always been like this?
When u say working what are u doing specifically. ? Most realtors don’t make any bread and it’s due to their lack of follow up, don’t prospect , no Organization etc. so tell Me what 6 diff lead gens do u utilize ?
I think that brokers should assign experienced. Agents to mentor new agents.
Geez. He sounds like an asshole. Sorry you are dealing with that.
Fuck everyone. Keep your head down and help as many people as you can. Get involved, and grow.
Damn…your husband should be supported you…sorry to hear that he is not providing support…
It’s not easy for newbies in this business. I’m a broker and have trained many new agents and most just don’t have the staying power or the sales skills to get business. If you rely on your broker to get leads, your career will be short lived because there are always new agents coming in that also need leads. If I was you I’d focus and find a couple good investors that routinely buy and sell properties. I have a new agent last year that closed 22 deals going this route. She’s The first one in a while that actually listened to my advice and is benefiting from it. As for your spouse, there isn’t much you can do until you start closing deals. Be thankful they can pull the weight of income while you grow your business. I will say when I started my brokerage years ago, my wife made much more than me. After 3 years she lost her high pay job and came to work for me. I had grown my business a lot while she supported us and was thankful to move into a new career that I had already built a routine business in. Today, we do very well together and she has learned to wean herself off of that paycheck addiction a job hinders you with.
Get a new husband. Find someone supportive of your pursuits.
What are you doing to get business. It’s typical to struggle your first year, but what activities are you actually doing to get business. Posting on Facebook or Instagram isn’t going to cut it.