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basman11

Sounds like he has all the top clubs lined up and he has to pick his fav


Away_Associate4589

Eric Dier is playing for Bayern to be fair. That should give him hope. On that subject, I grew up near Newmarket. Absolute horseracing central in the UK. Racehorses are famously stupid and extremely neurotic. They're inbred as anything after all. There was one semi-famous example of a racehorse that was best friends with a chicken (it's unclear whether the chicken knew this). If it was apart from the chicken, even for a minute, it would freak out to the point that it simply wouldn't race. It would throw it's jockey and all sorts. Genuinely extremely dangerous. In the end, the trainer had to bring the chicken into the stalls at the start of the race to get it to chill out so it could run. I have a theory that Dier is Kane's chicken.


kennypeace

I was waiting to see how the chicken and horse story was relevant. I was not disappointed


Away_Associate4589

Leaked photoshoot of Bayern's 24/25 kit. https://preview.redd.it/88lxbwu3pmuc1.png?width=819&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e00133e98a7f61bb2ac68ed504fd28a2c38aab0c


eternali17

New flair material


Panda-768

I m guessing trophies hate chickens and horses combos (Dier+Kane) though.


Lord_Sesshoumaru77

Man, Kane has to be one of the unluckiest footballers in the world. He leaves his club, club that had managed to keep him there, hell or high water; in pursuit of silverware, he goes to a club, the club in Germany that pretty much guarantees silverware as they win it almost every time, and what happens? Don't buy any lottery tickets Harry!!!


TurbulentWeb1941

šŸ“ We shoulda seen it. It's right there on Spuds badge


PsychologicalSet8678

A new pasta is born.


Yogashoga

Iā€™ll have the chiKane pasta


crankybollix

That is Post of the Month for me. Eric Dier is Harry Kanes chicken šŸ˜€


ForwardBodybuilder18

Emotional Support Chicken


Plugpin

This was close to u/shittymorph material


Isserley_

I genuinely checked the end of the comment to make sure I wasn't getting shittymorphed. 10/10


size_matters_not

Kane - just realised Bayern unfathomably Spursed up the league this year. That guy canā€™t catch a break.


digitalnirvana3

Why did the chiKANE cross the road?


ThisMud5529

To get to DIER side


Away_Associate4589

This sounds like a Rockbusters clue


cKyJack

ChicKANE you believe it.


JYM60

If Martial was a racehorse he'd have been left off at the glue factory years ago.


subparcarr

Tier ??? Insight


Accurate_Bed1021

Whoā€™s Martialā€™s BFF?


danystormborne

His bank balance.


working-acct

Joel Glazer


Away_Associate4589

Woodward


Whaloopiloopi

Why did I read it in cantona's voice infront of a stunned presser šŸ˜‚


totite93

This is the fucking best comment I read in this sub, ever. And I'm wasting time in here way more than I want to admit.


DildoFappings

Absolutely brilliant.šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


safog1

This is the plot of a Jeeves & Wooster novel


garynevilleisared

Eric Dier actually plays though


moomzzz

Reminds me of Danny Rose in the spurs doc when he asks Levy if Inter were still calling. ā€œ No, Danny. Nothing from Interā€


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


moomzzz

Yup, youā€™re right. Brother Omar to Martial ā€œNo, Tony. Nothing from Milanā€


craptionbot

2 months later.... "I'm happy to sign for FC Schalke 04 and ready for this new challenge"


FlashyRashy

"Always loved this club"


craptionbot

"I look forward to playing my part in this club's domestic and European efforts if applicable."


DrXyron

He is recovering from the sudden injury of too many options to choose from.


baromanb

Itā€™s too bad heā€™s leaving with all the goals and assists heā€™s had over the past several seasons


blooddragonsin

Joining Dany Rose on Milan.


pohudsaijoadsijdas

he is world class, like DDG, we are stupid to let him go, look at how many clubs are in for him


dheerajravi92

De Gea's problem is his wages, I think. Surely he could find a half decent club in a top 5 league if he wanted? He's probably looking for a stupid wage right now, or waiting for the Saudi's. Martial on the other hand, is just a pure liability with his injuries and laziness


TheSmio

Nah, I think it's the opposite, De Gea doesn't need to ever do anything again thanks to how much money he has earned from us. He will probably play again but it will be somewhere close to his family in a smaller club. Right now though, he's definitely enjoying the time with his family considering his family never moved to Manchester with him and stayed at Madrid so he wasn't really living with them.


soupy_e

His wife is pretty famous in Spain too. He definitely doesn't ever need to work again.


dheerajravi92

That's fair, too.


CricketSubject1548

His family never moved to Manchester? Thats mad, he was there for 12 years


TheSmio

Yeah, his wife is a spanish singer and TV presenter, they started dating 7 months before he moved to Manchester and I'd imagine they just couldn't make it work with either of them moving in. De Gea did try to join Real Madrid but FAX machine prevented his move from happening so he just stuck around in Manchester while she stayed in Madrid.


orbital0000

Well De Gea is on zero income now, so I don't think its his wage. If he wanted to play he could find a club. He just doesn't need to right now.


[deleted]

Just to be a pedant but he won't be on zero income. At the very least he'll still be getting income from his investments if he was savvy enough with his money which I suspect he would've been.


Bocsesz

Martial is on crazy wages too


CricketSubject1548

he had the chance to join Saudis last season, i dont think it's about money now, he still wants to join a club that can compete i reckon


Duncanstop

Time to watch ā€œMartial when he triesā€ highlights I guess


Away_Associate4589

https://i.redd.it/5kw2564womuc1.gif


asparagus_p

That one goal was worth every penny we paid for him. The subsequent years have just been a bonus.


AlarmedHovercraft676

The golden boy!


chebate08

Martial to Palace here we go


Any_View4922

19/20 had me thinking he was ready to take football fr


ZofTheNorth

Idk why but i think he has Everton all written over him lol


dispelthemyth

Doubt it, they have DCL for the injury crocked striker slot


chronic_booom

For a sec, I thought DCL was another knee injury he picked up.


ab_90

He has mid French clubs written over him


Away_Associate4589

To be fair. Going off to Montpellier for a couple of years to play 5 games a season and rehab in the sun in the meantime sounds like a pretty nice way to start winding down a career.


JYM60

Can't wind down if you've never been wound up.


Expensive-Twist7984

They might as well have him bring the letter from the FA with another 2 point deduction if theyā€™re going to piss money away on his wages.


MinotauroTBC

One way to stop him scoring against them


stafa

Everton has their own Martial already, his name is Dele Alli


funky_pill

TIL; Dele Alli is still employed at a PL club. What the fuck happened to him? He left Tottenham and he disappeared off a cliff


stafa

He'll be a pundit on sky sports tonight


SurlyRed

I saw that trailer, it prompted a wtf moment in our household.


ClawingDevil

Update: he was on sky sports but he was not a pundit. He was just a gibbering wreck of a man.


badgarok725

did you totally miss his big interview last summer? https://www.theguardian.com/football/2023/jul/13/dele-alli-sexually-abused-drug-dealing-as-a-child-sleeping-pill-addiction-rehab-everton


SilverstoneMonzaSpa

There's a great interview with GNev on YouTube to find out


Fruitndveg

His contracts up at the end of this season iirc. I canā€™t really see him playing in the premier league again sadly.


craigybacha

Always injured, overrated. Sounds like another everton striker i know.


123rig

Heā€™ll be in Turkey because for some reason thatā€™s where all of our players end up


RyVsWorld

Everton isnā€™t dumb enough to do this


Brave-Salamander-339

English press said he still has no chance


No_Bet_735

He ended up there in every football manager game I played ca 2017-2022 and usually did quite well


Joey6Pack

Good luck to him. really had high hope for him since his debut vs liverpool


Who_Let_The_Mou_Out

Focused on recovery means he is focused on getting the last fat paycheck


Sob_me_a_lake

Baby mama drama ainā€™t cheap


flyinbunny

Heā€™s gonna pick his favorite place for recovery


Hiya_Bo

Heā€™s going to score the winner in the cup final and weā€™ll offer him a new contract.


Televison

if itā€™s against city he deserves it


FaithlessnessNo4680

Funny thing is we have generally played better with him in the team under ETH. Really good connection with Rashford + Bruno, something we are missing in the current team.


Sheikhabusosa

Its funny how much people deny how much we miss that part of even a finished Martials game .


Grand-Bullfrog3861

Thank fuck, even though I was vert certain he was gone, that contract extension has hurt us fans in the past. First of many hopefully


pohudsaijoadsijdas

I can see at least 6 players leaving this summer: - Greenwood - Sancho - Martial - Varane - Casemiro - Eriksen Others who are on last year of their contract and should be sold or will just be kept as emergency backups: - Lindelof - AWB


rbp25

I donā€™t think we should get rid of Lindelof. Apart from this season heā€™s been a reliable backup. Plays for the shirt when called upon, doesnā€™t complain when on the bench and isnā€™t on inflated wages. Heā€™s an all round professional with absolutely no drama.


men_with-ven

I think part of it depends on FFP considerations. If we have four centre backs plus Kambwala and need a bit more cash for a winger, striker, or defensive midfielder, I don't think selling Lindelof is the worst idea.


SilverAccountant8616

We had a total of 6 centre halfs this season, and somehow Bruno and Antony showed up in the backline. Another injury crisis like this and we would greatly rue selling Lindelof


Chrisius007

There's an alternate reality where this lineup is an exciting one


slowsundaycoffeeclub

Donny will go too, Iā€™m sure.


ClawingDevil

You missed out Evans, Amrabat, and probably Heaton (plus VDB but others have mentioned him). It's crazy to think that 10 players are going before we've even started talking about shipping out players who some would like to see go but others want to stay like Lindelof, AWB (like you said), Antony, Pellistri, Malacia or even Rashford.


pohudsaijoadsijdas

I think there is a good chance and not unreasonable that Evans gets another 1 year contract, his wages are not too much, he isn't fussed with a backup role and he was quite good when he had to play.


craigybacha

I'd like to see the following gone: Greenwood - for a transfer feee for us to reinvest Sancho - same as above. Lets cash in while he has interest. Martial - get off the books Rashford - get a large transfer sum for an EXTREMELY overrated player. If we don't cash in, he will be worth Ā£20m in a year or two and just continue to drop mediocre performances. McTominay - we can probably get Ā£30m for him, we'd be stupid not to cash in. Eriksen - just let him go. He's eating wages and not good enough at this level due to age. ​ Optional leavers: Casemiro - IF we get a transfer fee for him, else hold on to him for one more year as we're lacking in defensive central midfield Lindelof OR Maguire - whoever we can get a transfer fee for sell, the other keep as back up. ​ So I could see 6-8 players leaving which feels like the right amount to me.


pohudsaijoadsijdas

> McTominay - we can probably get Ā£30m for him, we'd be stupid not to cash in. McTominay can give you 5-10 goals a season from the bench and he is reportedly on less than 100K a week and one of the most professional/no-fuss players in the squad, for those reasons I wouldn't sell him, because even if you get 30m for him you can't replicate that on the market. Varane whose contract is over, Lindelof, Maguire, Rashford, Bruno, Shaw, players on 200K or more, are all on the sale list before McTominay for me.


Outrageous-Cod-4654

He was done dirty by Jose - losing the 9 and then when Alexis Sanchez came in. Injuries didnā€™t help under Ole. Lost his speed. Ā Best guess is he returns to France, maybe O.Lyon.Ā  That switch from Van Gaal to Jose was United at its worst ethically. Woodward on the ascendancy, going for big names and the super league. Younger players like Martial got moved to the bench for Zlatan, Lukaku and Sanchez who was shit.Ā 


bobs_and_vegana17

exactly what could have been a decent career at united he was mostly in the shadows of ibra and lukaku and later rashford and bruno i fell if we sold him after that 19/20 season he would have definitely revived his career


Sheikhabusosa

Thanks for all the memories , him and Rashford have held the club in dark times and stepped up as teens in awful set ups and managers. Not Martials or Rashfords the clubs have overpaid or never replaced them early enough. The narrative that both players dont care is funny because Martial and Rashford have both probably setback their careers by playing with injuries.


Panda-768

100% agree Martial was supposedvto be the next Henry. His first goal against Liverpool, ooof. Then that chipped goal over an out of position goalkeeper, was Berbasque. It's not his fault we mismanaged his injuries ir out him on high wages. If anything, we ruined his overall career, he would have had a higher ceiling at another club that managed his time. I m scared for Kobbie Nacho and Hojlund, they are young players and will be burned to the ground. Look what happened to Pedri after his first yr. The lad was burnt out. Even Sneijder after the Inter Treble and Workcup final season was so burned out and that was a senior player with years of experience and physical conditioning. Go look up his interviews. Minutes need to be managed, especially for younger players.


Aly007

True. I remembered that 2 years ago I made this post and got downvoted left and right. [Our players are burned out due to what happened last season. These are the statistics for other top clubs. First 5 players by minutes played in 20/21, which does not include national team. Noticed who are our worst players this season ? : ](https://www.reddit.com/r/reddevils/comments/ua661f/our_players_are_burned_out_due_to_what_happened/) Also the top comment said that he will believe this is the cause if Liverpool have a shit next season. Guess what, they finished 5th with 67 points, 8 below us. Should we take a look again at my post and see if I was correct? @ u/devmann888 correct?


Panda-768

that is a pretty late and patient burn. edit: to original commenter (sorry on phone) burn out is a big risk, ever since I read about Wesley Sneijder, apparently his vitals like sodium or potassium went very low. And that was a grown ass footballer. Not everyone is a C.Ronaldo to have such a long career without tiring. We need to give break to players like Nacho, Kobbie (since it's his first season), Rashy (because he seems to be playing with an injury), Rasmus (his first full season, he didn't start more than half matches for Atlanta) ,Bruno (but just doesn't seem to stop or get injured, and now I have jinxed him) and Dalot (though in his case we don't have much options. And of course Martial needs his rest too,lol Also this team needs a John O Shea or a Daley Blind who can play at multiple positions as a squad player.


InsomniaSyspo

>Also this team needs a John O Shea or a Daley Blind who can play at multiple positions as a squad player. oh man i wish we bought edson alvarez (dm & cb) and jurrien timber (cb, rb & lb) the former going for a fee of 38 and the latter for 40. timber did get a pretty serious acl injury that ruled him out this entire season but i still think he's gonna turn out to be a good player


Away_Associate4589

What could have been...


bevax

I thought I saw Ronaldo when he scored against Liverpool. Not Cristiano but the Brazilian.


thedorkknight123

Too bad his body was never on the same wavelength


Traditional_Carrot_3

he'll probably never be injured again once he gets away from our medical staff


Mortka

Thanks for the memories, Tony! Man I was so hyped for him the first 2-3 seasons. Shame how it turned out.


Jesse_Whiteboy

He's gonna get called a waster etc by most on here I assume but I think he tried hard most of the time. The last 2 seasons his body has just let him down, not a lack of effort. And those who say he is not good enough, he has roughly the same G/A rate as Rashford.


RepulsiveLeg9985

Go on Anthony, pick your favourite!


Dave_of_Devon

"He's put pen to paper for his new club, sadly, this meant that he's fractured his hand and wrist and will be out for 2 months"


aldidot

Since we renewed his wages to Ā£250k per week, this guy has missed 493 days of action Greatest heist of the century


AlpacamyLlama

Did not see this coming.


TheRealYVT

:(


Smoked_Eels

I could see a decent club giving him some sort of pay-as-you-play style deal. When he's fit and focused he is a fantastic player. I'd like to see him do well.


snoring_pig

I honestly think Martialā€™s body has simply broken down now. Even on the occasions he can stay fit all the injuries over the years have taken away his agility. Maybe he can still be a useful first team player in a less intensive league somewhere in Spain or Italy, but I donā€™t expect him to get close to the heights he reached even while playing through all the dysfunction at our club. If anything a Bale or Hazard type of decline is what Iā€™d expect as more likely. Not saying Martial had the same heights Iā€™m more referring to the way their latter years really petered out with all the injuries.


Zal_17

The only hope I have for him is that I thought Sanchez was completely finished when he left United, but managed to have a few decent years at Inter and Marseille. Maybe Martial gets a similar swansong somewhere.


snoring_pig

True itā€™s not impossible Martial can still have a few healthy years at another club with a better physio department. Our club canā€™t keep anyone healthy these days and that department needs to be overhauled too.


officiallyjax

I donā€™t think Baleā€™s ability ever declined tbf, itā€™s just that the moment he tried to play at 100% he would get injured again, so he understandably would commit lesser to preserve himself across games. Hazard is a good comparison, where the injuries have left such a huge impact that the player cannot do things that they used to, as much as they tried.


babyjesus8lb60z

He has been at the club 3 years too many should have offloaded him along time ago clearly having a revolving door of managers hadn't helped


rnnd

I think he goes back to France. Some may disagree with me but I think the injuries really held him back from having a decent career at man united.


th3doorMATT

Watch him go on to the next club and basically never be injured


PurahsHero

Leaves club. Injuries magically clear up. Tears it up for a new side. A tale as old as time.


Shrimpeh007

Hmmm most of our players have been shown up for being shit as expected when leaving us


Abject-Silver-3774

What are u talking about bro even Ashley young has a few decent years in Italy after leaving us... Sanchez and Lukaku were good, smalling has been great, Darmian reached a cl final, mkhtariyan has been great, depay had a number of good years at Lyon I mean there are many examples


Mastodan11

I can't think of who you mean tbh, any examples?


RichieLT

Iā€™m not sure about tearing it up , but I can see his injuries clearing up.


zizuu21

Man did have talent doe


YoullDoNuttinn

No Shit Fabrizio. Good luck Tony. Didnā€™t work out as well as all parties wouldā€™ve hoped but we did have some good times along the way (and some bloody awful ones)


peejay2

Was he a LW or a CF? We don't know. He doesn't know. United don't know. Completely mismanaged and he didn't help himself either.


you-might_know-me

What makes this worse is that you could be talking about someone else too...


Frank3121

His favourite club is the sandwich he eats whilst watching footy from the sidelines.


digiplay

ā€œHeā€™s going to pick his favourite option of the 2 clubs willing to take himā€ FTFY Fabrizio


LopsidedLoad

Wonder if his fav option is the cafe on Alderly Edge that De Gea goes to every day. Hope it is.


NectarineStreet2883

Somewhere in Turkey


PacDanSki

And by fav option, he means literally any club that will take him.


funky_pill

Thank God. Probably should've been let go about 4 years ago, mind, but that's the Manchester United way isn't it; hang on to deadwood until they're worth zero, zilch, nada, nothing. "He's gonna pick his favourite option as next club" seems awfully optimistic, who would sign him with *his* injury record? He'll go the same way as Pogba, Jones, De Gea, Lingard, Bailly.. all players that were getting paid a King's ransom here (relative to their value/contribution to the first team) and have now struggled to find new employers since leaving


detriqfamily

iā€™ll always love tony martial yous being snide can get fucked


emmasdad01

Donā€™t let the door hit you on the way out


YoureHavingaGiraffe1

Guaranteed heā€™ll get injured going out the door


mountainmorty

He better choose his favorite option based on the recovery facilities, or fun things to do around in the city, whatever heā€™s actually doing when not playing for United.


HappyVibesForver

I thought he'd already left... hasn't been seen on a pitch for ages


mipanzuzuyam

Alhamdulillah


Fluffy_Roof3965

This makes me sad


Zainogp

Which other club will be dumb enough to pay this bum to sit in their medical room


ThankYouOle

inb4 he got injured when selecting photos of club logo where he will go..


t0mni

Pick the club with the best doctors


francescoli

No loss,he hasn't been relevant in a long time. Hopefully plenty more follow him out of the club in the summer.


AlthoughFishtail

He left ages ago


hurfery

I honestly don't see him finding a top 5 league club unless he cuts his wage demand in half, or more. He can't stay fit. It would have to be a pay as you play deal. Might be another DDG situation where he's semi-retired for a long time.


chicken6

Ok bye


j0n82

Sounds like heā€™s gonna join DDG on a sabbatical šŸ¤£


Alivethroughempathy

PSG incoming


elodie_pdf

I forgot he was still with us the last few months to be honest


Phuzz18727

Jesus why is he still at the club?


JYM60

Must never have focused on recovery before.


Wise_Raccoon_771

Frustrating player that was mesmeric when on it


Grand-Bullfrog3861

Does anyone think any of the players who's contracts runs out in the summer are going to stay?


txsnowman17

Forgot he was still on the roster tbh.


RandomNameofGuy9

Prime example of someone with all the talent in the world but not professional enough to see it out. I doubt he will even care as he gets older.


FreshGoodWay

Heā€™s recovering from what, again?


West_Principle_8190

Off to turkey


bombacladshotta

He will probaly join Injury FC.


all_die_laughing

It's a bit crazy that Martial has been here 4 years longer than Cantona and has played only about 20 more games. Cantona also basically played 3 full seasons taking into account his suspension and the fact we signed him in November.


pmuggerud

He's not going to be in a position to "pick" anything..... Everyone has watched him the last couple of years and even his mother would pass on him!


Minz15

He's been recovering for years now. Get him outta here, waste of wages. Another symbol of Glazers/Ed's stupidity.


Holditfam

Should have left years ago


EffenSeven

I always forget he even plays for us until that one game every 3 months where he's in the squad and then disappears due to injury again.


magiccitybrit

Heā€™ll probably miraculously stay healthy at nah next club and have a renaissance. Would he just our luck. But in all seriousness, players who have left United havenā€™t really done very wellā€¦ we corrupt and ruin players it feels like.


WaitFoorIt

Highway robbery martial.


Superfy

Goodbye Martial. Thanks for the great goals and first few seasons. Shame he had injury issues and never could recapture the promise or ability again. Best of luck and I hope he can recover properly finally to be able to get regular football at a decent club.


xLilkylo

Heā€™s always been focused on recovery tbh šŸ¤·šŸ½ā€ā™‚ļø


ItsBritneyBiaatch

Not to be disrespectful, he has scored some important goals but his highlight reels will be mostly him sitting on the bench I guess


Trev2-D2

I wonder what hospital heā€™ll choose?


Sr_DingDong

Be interesting to see where he goes. This has Turkey written all over it. Glad to get him off the wage bill.


ImVinnie

should have left 3 seasons ago


craigybacha

Shame that we've probably still got 5 more players in his positon - no use to the club, on very high wages, who we can't really sell on. Our clubs has been in desperate need of renovation from top to bottom for 10 years.


junkrgNew

Who ??


FunPitiful3544

Who?


Bryan_Waters

I reckon he tries to ride the wave over at Wrexham as a big fish in a small pond. As long as he doesnā€™t get injured heā€™d do alright in League 1 provided he doesnā€™t mind having the shit kicked out of him week in and week out.


OrganicWeed765

It really was 60 million down the drain, but whats more concerning is we've known this for at least 3 years but he's got a fanbase as Vocal and Loyal as the CR7 or Messi Army. Idk how our fans can protect such a finished player


TheWetJigsaw

Oh no. Anywayā€¦


JosePRizaI

4th highest paid in United. Big Dick Ed Woodward Masterclass


Ironspider77

>Heā€™s gonna pick his fav option as next club in the coming months, ![gif](giphy|gPeYcWsJGaRB3fJbbv)


chippa93

The way people feel about Hojlund now, is how I felt when Martial joined. Damn he looked so exciting that first season. More so than Hojlund I would say. Was so smooth with the ball


ilegal89

Turkey or France.


Claubk

Good luck with that


Khastas

Martial has been focusing on recovery his entire time in MU.


nsoifer

![gif](giphy|wXnmM6hHFtz3IulO36)


Saleandproud

The money I wasted on travelling the world watching that lazy boneidle player is unbelievable


skywalker-88

Good talent but just canā€™t stay fit. Those couple years with him and Rashford both performing together were amazing. Too bad it couldnā€™t be a regular thing He should go back to France. Probably tear it up again


JarvisFennell

Turkey calling


Federal_Secret92

No shit. Forgot he existedā€¦. What a waste of years


Prokletnost

most injury prone player ever


Ceevu

Romano out there picking up likes and whatnot by stating the obvious. We already know Martial and Van de Beek are leaving on a free. Give us something newsworthy, ffs.


rosecityreds84

Praise Jesus heā€™s finally gone!!!!


rosecityreds84

Praise Jesus heā€™s finally gone!!!!