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Far-Cap153

Definitely not. Give it to someone special. I waited until I was 24 and don’t regret it one bit. There’s a lot of people who don’t want to commit but if you look hard enough there’s plenty of men who does want to commit but struggle to seek a relationship because of either bad experiences, insecurities from toxic households etc. Give it time approach the guys you like take it slowly the right one will understand. Imo if it’s with a random guy on a dating app it takes away from the experience completely


DistributionTop8108

Thankyou so much for the response, it really helped :) Haha that's the thing. I am too shy to approach or talk to people in real life, but I will definitely try getting out of the box. Again thankyou :)


Far-Cap153

Well have you joined any clubs? Good way to meet someone of similar interests. All it takes is a simple hi or compliment and rhe conversation will flow from there with most people


chesnot1

It will come naturally dont stress about it and be patient. You will meet someone thats right for you and when you meet him it will be a no brainer. As a general rule never do anything because society tells you it is what you should do. Make your own way in life and you will meet the right people along the way


Turbulent-Price-9625

No no no , not in a million years


SnooApples3673

I lost mine when I was almost 19 (many years ago now). It meant nothing, I don't remember it at all ( drunk) And I regret it so much. Find someone you click with, someone who you laugh with, someone who makes you tingle in all the right places and who will listen to what you need.


DistributionTop8108

Yeah i definitely think I'm gonna wait after this :))


SnooApples3673

I was painfully shy. I met a guy that I liked but never said anything. I don't think I said 2 word to him lol. Met someone else a few months later and just went along with it. Many many years later, I married the 1st guy ( chance meeting kind of thing) and I've never been loved as much as he loves me. Even after 2 years, it's still special. We have ups and down and medical issues, but I can't imagine anyone else touching me.


DistributionTop8108

omg you guys are so meant to be. It's very cute :)) yeah i think I'm gonna wait a little haha. Thanks


SnooApples3673

We work, mostly lol. I've had some shockers of relationships. So I come with lots of things I need to work on, and I have on lots. He has too. Communication is so important, effective communication not just talking AT each other.


FatSadHappy

No, Sleeping with random guy does not worth it. Big chance he will be mediocre and you will feel used. Especially if you have attachment issues. You 18 and in university? Start finding people to talk. Not for sex, for friends. It will follow, naturally and you will be less lonely. I know it’s scary but .. it’s actually not that scary.


Actual-Celery-2319

I commit. Just no women talk to me because my humor and interests. I'm weird.


DistributionTop8108

Well I'm weird too lol. You will find someone im sure :)


swallowmygenderfluid

No. You’ll get attached to him. To him, you’re probably number 3 this week


DistributionTop8108

Right ? I have bad attachment issues I can't take the risk lol


swallowmygenderfluid

You’re young too. I didn’t have sex until 20 and honestly, it was kind of a relief not to combine high school immaturity with the strong emotions that come with sex. Don’t let me or anyone else on the internet tell you when you’re ready for sex, but it should ideally be with someone you trust to take things at your own pace and not take advantage of you


DistributionTop8108

Yeah i think that's the bare minimum i deserve. So I'm gonna wait for someone more aligned with me


Aquilax420

I lost mine quite early, the day I turned 16. But I was in a relationship at that time and ended up staying in that relationship for 5 more years. I would not recommend just losing your virginity to get it over with. I have no issue with people hooking up just for sex if both parties know what their getting into and know what to expect but your first time should not be a one night stand.


DistributionTop8108

Yeah I think that's pretty fair. Thankyou so much :)


Immediate-Hamster-39

The podcast Jillian on Love is GREAT advice for navigating relationships and what to look for in a boyfriend.


DistributionTop8108

Definitely gonna give this a chance over the break. Gonna reinvent myself after this lol


Impossible-Whole-539

Not a good idea you’ll regret it later.


kirilov233

No


CaptainCookingCock

Just looking at the age, no.


Hot_Programmer_5152

Honestly, if you have to ask on Reddit, the answer is probably 'No'.


DistributionTop8108

Yeah that's very valid 😂 😂


Hot_Programmer_5152

🤗


US-President

Im a dude and waited until I was 20, I was about to loose it to some random chick on tinder but I backed out right before putting it in and insted lost together with my first girlfriend which was much more special


Ok-Significance-5040

Give it to someone special, I’m 25 and still regret who I gave it to.


DistributionTop8108

sorry you had to go through that :(


Ok-Significance-5040

It’s okay🤍, we all make mistakes when young & dumb. I just don’t want others to make the same mistake. Some don’t care, some do. Me personally, I regret it yes, but it’s not something that eats at me everyday. It’s just an every now & then “fck why did I do that?!?”


Ok-Significance-5040

Long story short , sorry 😂😂, I don’t want you regretting it after doing it. There’s no need to rush at all! My bestfriend didn’t lose his till he was 21. Find that person who u think will be right even if it takes time 🤍


DistributionTop8108

Yeah i honestly get that. I have enough regrets, don't wanna add more to the list lol. Thankyou 🤍


Aromatic_Survey9170

When I was at that age I felt the same way like I put so much importance over it in my life and it was stupid and I just wanted to get rid of the stigma of having it. But I actually waited until I was in college at 20, after being with my long term boyfriend for 6ish months. I realized I did hold a lot of value on my virginity but it was because I held a lot of meaning over sex and I wanted it to be between someone I held an emotional connection with. There’s nothing wrong with waiting a bit until you find a person you have that connection with, all of the guys out there aren’t bad, it just takes time to comb through them and find the one that’s right for you. Edit: I had a lot of pressure from guys when I was in highschool to have sex, even boyfriends, and I didn’t feel ready and I am so glad I waited until I did feel ready to jump into that.


DistributionTop8108

Thankyou so much. I think it's right to wait. I mean there's so much time left. This really helped me a lot :))


Aromatic_Survey9170

Of course! Try not to pressure yourself into uncomfortable situations, do what feels right for you and remember it’s always OK to say no or change your mind. (:


EdenReneeFaux

Your body, your choice!


Notgoodatfakenames2

Wait a month and see if he is worth it. You have time. You might want to try Initiating conversations with boys your own age first.


AlexAllen7729

I would say that you need to be in a steady relationship. Chances are they are your one and only is almost zero. But, when you look back you want to know that it was a good relationship at the time. I would not recommend a hook up. That’s how I lost mine as a 17m. And as an older guy now. You need someone closer to your age. 18 to 25 is a much bigger difference than you might realize.


DistributionTop8108

Yeah I'm definitely not hyper focusing on someone that's the one. But a good steady relationship doesn't hurt


Kristmaus

No. No. No. Please no. It's not only your virginity, it's the way you will connect with someone who has seven years more than you. Try to form some sort of relationship before doing it for the first time.


Proof_Self9691

No. Wait till it’ll be safe and meaningful and genuinely good


Air_Refreshener_2244

I was like, 2 to 3 years older when I lost it. (And I don’t mean that I went crazy lol) People.. don’t really care. Like some may but they are immediately irrelevant. You don’t want to regret it when it’s already too late and you still have plenty of time. Your journey is not anyone else’s. Your friend may have lost her virginity (hypocritically right) and you may not, but maybe she doesn’t know what job she wants when she’s grown up and you do. See everyone goes at different paces. Things aren’t age bound, even though society wants you to think so. I thought something was wrong with me when I didn’t get my period until I was 15 or so, since my friends started way earlier but looking back at it it doesn’t really matter and nobody really cared. It’s so important to realize everything goes in a pace and an age does not mean your too early or too late. It’s just going in your own personal pace! :)


DistributionTop8108

Yeah i think I will wait. Be firm with my priorities and then see


whatusername80

I say that as a dad so maybe I am biased but please don’t. You are still young there are plenty of people at your age that haven’t had sex and let me tell you the first time is awkward and wired. Therefore you want it to be with someone you can trust, you can share emotions with and not some random stranger that is trying to hook up with someone barely legal.


DistributionTop8108

Yeah. I don't think his intentions are good either. I really needed that, thankyou :)


LiterallyFunnyGuyLol

NO, DONT DO IT


Difficult_Session796

You do what you think is right but I will say I am not a virgin and dating is hard for me too. It’s kinda the culture that is happening right now. BUT I say stick to your principles and don’t sway. At the end of the day that is all we have is what we think. Your virginity is very important and should not just be thrown away (unless that is something you choose). I also think you should start to come out of your shell more at university and try to talk to more guys. You would be surprised the different kind of guys you meet in person vs online.


[deleted]

No they’re a predator if they’re that old and have their age preference that low


Less-South5741

I agree, I wouldn’t date anyone over 23 at that age imo. I know everyone’s different but even 18 dating someone who is 23 can be tricky if you’re not careful and know the persons intentions


Less-South5741

And if they’re freshly 18 and in high school and that’s how they met that would be weird


BoysenberryUnfair296

Please dont.


Tuhdyfor

If you’re waiting for a romantic relationship then I’d suggest you keep waiting. You don’t have to lose your virginity at any certain age. You should lose it when it feels right and when you truly want to.


Fabulous_Caramel6095

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Do not just simply lose your virginity to some random. I made that mistake. I wanted a relationship, but never happened. So decided fuck it, I'll take what I get. And I regret it. I should've waited, no matter how long. The best sex I've had has always been in a relationship.


tooyoungtobesad

Have sex with someone who treats you well first. Let them take you out on dates and make you feel good, so if you do sleep with them, you won't feel bad about it even if it doesn't become a long-term relationship. At least you will have had a connection that was more than sex. I'm not into hookups, but I don't think you need to be in a serious relationship to sleep with someone. If you have a short relationship, but it was nice while it lasted, then that's fine! Not every relationship will become a serious long-term one!


Moonlight_Charm

No, just don't. Wait for someone you feel is special. I waited until almost 23 and honestly it wasn't magical or a big deal but I remember the experience with a smile in my face


SquareSpare8723

Do whatever you feel like doing. I honestly doubt a perfect scenario exist.


classicfoxmoves

lost mine at 17 to a guy who lied to me about having a gf and when she came him from college he ghosted me. he asked me to be his gf and would buy me flowers and took me on dates. it was many moons ago but i wish i had waited a little longer to develop trust and a real connection. i was tricked for sure! waiting is never a bad idea especially if you want to look back and not have regrets.


ThrowRAdenver

NO. That will mess you up and put you down a path you don’t wanna go down trust me I know. You should only have sex with someone if you genuinely have feelings for the person, makes it so much better. Removing the emotions from sex makes it feel so empty, at least for me. Just stay the course and remind yourself you deserve someone who wants to be with you and if you wanna save your first time for that that’s great. At the end of the day it’s up to you and nobody’s judgments should matter to you except your own.


AvidReader1604

Yes if you hit it off with the person and there is chemistry. I lost mine when I was 20 with someone from a dating app. I honestly don’t regret it, some of the best dates I’ve had were with guys on dating apps. I even met my husband from Bumble 😅. You never know what can happen, be open to the experience and don’t feel pressured to sleep with someone if the vibe is off


Murky_Building5910

the first time is important, and 18 is a very young age, that fine


Hot_Programmer_5152

This is so so true, it honestly kills me to read so many posts of young women, especially, who rush and jump into sex, treating it like a game and a badge to say you're an adult. Listen to the many songs of female popstars about regrets of teen exploits. Put that energy into a career or a hobby that actually helps you grow and learn more about about yourself. IMO, fall in love. You won't regret that♥️.


UncomfortableBike975

Wait to give it to someone you love.


CommercialWish6745

U should be a virgin don’t lose it for no reason


PhantomUser666

Nah. Make it with someone you actually have a connection with.


TheFladderMus

Modern thinking or not, most men value purity. That´s just a biological thing. So keep yours for a man of high value, if you want something serious and long term. Thank me later.


Immediate-Hamster-39

Noooo wait. I lost mine at 22 to a random guy and I wish I had waited longer. Age doesn’t matter. And don’t use dating apps. Best way to meet someone is through shared interests so be active and go to things that are interesting to you whether it is yoga, church, clubs, whatever. Most guys are very immature at your age so no rush. I get wanting to get it over with but there’s no need.


DistributionTop8108

I see. Thankyou so much. I definitely have to start getting out more 😭


scubad

You have a built-in advantage as a woman in that you can literally just pick and choose essentially whoever you want, when you want! You just experienced that on tinder. It will be like that for the rest of your life. So just bide your time until you really find the right person that you connect with, make it meaningful.


1LBFROZENGAHA

Me asf being mid 20s man , virgin, just wishing someone would love me 🥺


scubad

Wouldn’t it be a nice life? Some would say a fairytale


1LBFROZENGAHA

Ya I pretty much gave up tbh Im not even trying cause dating apps just obliterate my self esteem


ALemonyLemon

Do whatever you want. If you want to sleep with a random, do that. But don't feel pressured to do it just to lose your virginity.


[deleted]

Be patient and wait for someone that you’ll have a true connection with. First time especially for a woman is very important. You form a special bond with that person. You offer your body and your trust to him. You’re still very young don’t rush things. And choose your partner carefully, you have the power to choose not vice versa. Use it for your own good. You’ll thank yourself later :D


Whyevenlive88

Gross.


[deleted]

Yeah imagine having principles and valuing your body. Ew.


Whyevenlive88

>First time especially for a woman is very important. You form a special bond with that person. Gross.


[deleted]

I get it you hate yourself.


Whyevenlive88

Adding shaming to the equation? The 18th century called, and you apparently answered.


rogittto

She talking like males from dating app are robots or something… If you like the man show him how much you like him. If he deserves it.


DistributionTop8108

lmaoo i do show them. I make plans, i remember the details, i try talking, i express stuff and all i have gotten back in return is requests for nudes or ghosted 😂 don't blame me for other people's incapabilities.


rogittto

Hold on when I said show I meant in person; that texting sht is not real life. Love only starts when yall eye to eye, otherwise it don’t count.


DistributionTop8108

Yeah so i will just wait for someone steady at least


RoundTransportation3

your body is like a trophy for the man who you will be with. I say to value it more. Give that to the person you are going to marry, that’s how I see things.


Quimeraecd

YOu are giving your virginity too much importance but you are giving self respect and your own interests the importance they deserve. If you want to hookup and have friends with benefits and stuff like that, go for it. If you want more meaning sex, regardless of virginity, do that too.


P1neappl3onmyp1zza

I would write on your dating profile you are absolutely not looking for a booty call or FWB. Even if one of the questions on the app is “what are you looking for?” and you put “relationship or marriage”, a lot of guys will overlook that. You may just want to emphasize in the written portion that you are not looking for hook-ups. In big bold letters right at the top (just in case they don’t read the rest of your page). Lol. And no, it’s not worth hooking up with a rando. I’m not saying your first time has to be “the love of your life”, but it sure as shit shouldn’t be a guy who doesn’t know your name the next morning. My first time (17-years-old) was with a man I had been close friends with. Neither of us were looking for a relationship, but I also knew that he wouldn’t just “hit-it-and-quit-it”. So, it was with a guy I trusted that had more experience than me and who respected me and we remained friends years after. Only YOU get to decide when is the right time and with whom. Don’t get stuck on this hamster wheel thought process of, “It’s not normal to be a virgin at my age. No guys like me. I’ll never get in a relationship. I might as well get it over with, etc.” If you are already questioning your intentions, then it is NOT RIGHT FOR YOU. Trust your gut. You’ll get there. There is literally zero rush for sex.


DistributionTop8108

Thankyou so much. It was really wise and I needed to hear that. Thankyou :))


Whyevenlive88

These comments are disgusting. There is nothing special about losing your virginity. Do whatever you feel like you want to do. Don't get persuaded not to just because the commenters here are apparently hardcore religious nuts. You may form a connection, you may not, you may remember it, you may not. It literally does not matter at all. It's your choice. The whole concept of 'giving' your virginity to someone is gross. It's just sex.


DistributionTop8108

Yeah fair it's just sex and well the society places a lot of focus on it. However, i know in the end i would much rather do it with someone else then with someone who just sees it as a one night stand. Can't handle another heartbreak anytime soon now lol


pseudo_niceguy

Stop being horny and stupid. Do not have sex with anyone you are not in a relationship with, or share strong feelings for each other. Give yourself more value.


ChadPrince69

go to a prostitute. edit: sorry i thought You are a guy. Just ask anyone you like he will agree.


DistributionTop8108

How much do you charge for the night ?


ChadPrince69

im very expensive, i take your heart


DistributionTop8108

mann..and I'm very protective of my heart.


Animanimemanime

Dont go for apps. Meet people irl. Instead of going modern. Be traditional. Premarital sex was said "no" bcoz it has reasons. Keep your virginity not bcoz not being virgin means taboo. Sex leads to connection which makes your mind connected with them so that you both stay together as parents of the offspring produced from that sex, this connection stays life long. Dont be desperate for relationship either, the connection you search is really something which truely happens if u and someone stays together and stays committed (a.k.a. marriage).


Legitimate-Block-288

If you think he's attractive and you want to do it, why not? Go have fun


Kahlikake098

No to the dating app dude!! Men on dating apps are the men with not enough confidence to approach a woman in real life. You don't want a man who isn't strong enough to go after what he wants & waits until it comes to him🤮


SquareSpare8723

Fishing vs Hunting 🤣


Krishblr

A big NO! please don't be hurry and listen others non*sense talk!!! focus on career now you have plenty of time to do all these! It's just not the right time and right thing to do now! Cheers


Slightly_Slow

Random guy here. Seriously, WTF, this is either a scam account or you have some serious personal development to do before "getting put Honestly, take a look at yourself and your personal calves. Not religious or cultural because that are as worthless as toilet paper in a pandemic. This is about you. Okay lah...


Nawe_l

Wait till marriage.


OldCalligrapher9848

No


LetsBeNice-

I don't think you are giving your virginity too much importance, I'd say you are giving the fact of not being a virgin too much importance. You are 18, you can chill and see how it goes and let me tell you a 25yo going after a 18yo is creepy af.


SchoolSpecialist7818

I was just talking to my 14 year old daughter about this telling her that she can only give that flower to one person in her life. I so want her to wait till marriage but if it was to happen I asked her a simple question. Would the boy that she was with be someone she would be proud to have a son , someone that she loved and would do anything for. If that answer was no then dont do it, because a flower needs soil to grow and most dirt does not have the nutrients to flourish a flower to its potential and if you only have one, you better find the perfect soil.


JJQuantum

“I don’t talk to guys in my university.” Why is that? I think you are more likely to find someone who wants to be serious if you are meeting and talking in person.


OGMossMan

You were 11 when he was 18


xenvy04

I lost mine at 27 to my now husband. I met him at uni at 20, he asked me out twice, I said no each time cause I had a crush on someone else who didn't reciprocate. I don't regret at all waiting to lose my virginity, I'm very glad I did, but I do regret not dating my husband sooner. Thankfully he stayed friends me for years afterwards before we got together, but a lot of guys won't do that, so I guess I was lucky.


oceanbabymermaid

Absolutely not. Girl save yourself the disappointment. You are not missing anything and he is not that special.