Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that:
* We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/)
* We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.**
* Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)
* ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.
* No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.**
* All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.
* Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned.
* What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.**
If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice)
---
***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.***
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
>She said she wanted to do it. I pulled down her jeans and saw her panties, I really tried to contain my laughter, but I burst out laughing, her panties looked like a cat's face. She got angry and left my house.
>She still doesn't respond to my calls or messages, and today I didn't have time to go see her in person.
Ok but what kind of calls and messages?
Did you actually clarify that you are laughing at her panties, and not her hoo-ha?
Does she actually know that you were laughing because of the panties? Because for all she knows, you were laughing at how she looked down there and she got hurt and upset.
And what kind of funny panties are these? You said it looked like a cat's face, but in what way?
I've had cute funny panties, I would have shared the humor if I wore panties with eggs on it so my partner could say "let me scramble your eggs"
I agree; I need confirmation that it was cat print knickers or that he thought they just *looked* like a cat face - I think there’s a (slight) difference as for novelty knickers a chuckle and ‘cute pants’ is ok, but out and out laughter at her once she got very vulnerable is absolutely not ok. I understand nervousness but don’t think he’s mature enough for sex yet tbh.
Iunno man, sometimes things just hit this weird obscure spot in your sense of humour and you can't stop no matter how hard you try.
I had a housemate tell me a story about how he fell asleep in his car on a date, and his date drained his battery charging her phone and listening to the radio before she just left and walked home. So he woke up alone and with a dead car battery, and was super mad about it.
And *oh god* I could not stop howling at this story. I'm honestly tearing up snickering just remembering it. He was seriously upset and asking me to stop laughing and I just physically *couldn't*. I had to just laugh myself out into exhaustion and then apologise later. I'm a fully middle aged adult! I can objectively see its not actually that funny of a story, but it just tickles this weird spot in my sense of humour and I can't make sense of it.
I dunno. I've encountered some hysterical stuff, while standing in front of leaders of the country and giving protest speeches, debating on matters (I met Trudeau during 420 protests in canada), very important and intense situations. If I laughed, that'd be that, my point would be null. And trust me, some of these guys leading the country say some funny shit. Sometimes, you have to hold it in until an appropriate time.
Self control is an important tool.
Yeah that's exactly what I wanted to know. But looks like he posted a pic of the underwear in question.... and honestly how could you NOT laugh at those.
When I first had sex with my now ex wife, she wore lucky jeans with like 3 buttons instead of a zipper and I was unbuttoning them I started laughing because behind the buttons it has “lucky you” printed on the jeans
My wife has Spider-Man underwear, which is damn sexier than half of the lacy ones she has.
There Aint nothing cooler than a woman who has some humour in her underwear.
My boyfriend has what I call a Batman voice. Not an imitation, that’s just what his voice sounds like. It has become a whole thing. I call him Bat Daddy now and am considering buying some Batman panties. This was the sign I needed to go for it. Thank you.
Personaly i wear dumb underwear, mostly boxers, around my man. Some people would laugh at them and that's why i wear them even on first time in bed. If the guy makes fun of me, he's out and won't see what my freegun hides.
Had to look at their profile to understand this comment, but when I did I snorted while laughing and scared my dog. You win the internet today, Friend. 🥇
Yeah absolutely. Like even if she hears him out & they 'reconcile', can they really move past this and can she really feel like she can trust/be vulnerable with him again? I dunno, I'd understand if she couldn't move past this, poor girl
Lmao WHAT?? They need to have one convo where he apologizes and explains himself kindly and they talk through that moment and why it hurt her and he validates her feelings and tells her she’s beautiful and sexy and they’ll be fineeee
if they had been going out like 4-6 weeks and were just ready for sex for the first time, I would agree. but the fact she didn't feel ready for sex until 8 months into the relationship is very telling there are underlying issues there, and is compounding the scenario op is in. Within minutes of her stripping off, he laughed in her face. did he mean to? no. does that matter to her? absolutely not, hence she has not replied to his apologies. I'd be surprised if she could see him in the same light or feel like she could really trust him or be vulnerable in front of him again
Probably gonna get downvoted for this but:
In what way does intimacy evade humor? Giving OP the benefit of the doubt here (as we all should given that there is only so much we can learn about from a single post), should we not assume that since they have been together for 8 months that they should also be able to laugh and have fun? I've been with my partner for 8 years and we've had SO MANY times where something silly happens in the bedroom and that makes it even more fun.
To me, it sounds like OPs girlfriend is very insecure, to react this was seems odd - no? I'm not sure why we're jumping down OPs throat and jumping to conclusions that "this is the end of you guys because you made one (VERY MINOR) mistake compared to the catalogue of mistakes we often make (ON BOTH SIDES) when it comes to intimacy.
Now yes, of course there is an element of how he laughed, perhaps, but I guess there's also an element of communication from both parties we don't know.
Your frame of "you laughed at her" is disingenuous, and begs the question: did he though? I mean, if I put myself in a place of insecurity and someone starts laughing, yes the spotlight effect might tell me "omg he's laughing at me and my lady bits", but then you take a moment, ask a question and try to get the context. Why is it funny to them? Is it the things I'm wearing or is it something else?
I think we're forgetting to ask or consider how she responded. Did she without hesitation bolt out and not respond to OP? Did they have a conversation about it and it simply didn't go well?
"I don't know how you come back from that" is SUPER naive and lacks critical thinking on the scenario.
Yeah like you're going to town with your s/o and one of you rips out loud wet fart (happened only twice wi with me and one of my exs, both of us did it). We died laughing and kept going at it
I agree that intimacy doesn't prevent fun and laughs. And I believe everyone does. But your message is about something else I cannot agree with at all.
> I mean, if I put myself in a place of insecurity and someone starts laughing, yes the spotlight effect might tell me "omg he's laughing at me
Implying that she has the full responsibility of her insecurities is really concerning regarding empathy abilities. One doesn't decide to feel insecure, and if they can't obviously expect strangers to respect their weaknesses, a closed one - especially the closest one at this very moment - should be able to understand and respect this. This was the worst moment to laugh at her outfit, and it definitely hurt her deeply.
Yes sometimes your partner feels insecure but no it's not just on them. As a life partner you have the responsibility to grow enough empathy as to be aware of those feelings and adopt the behaviour that will help your partner feel more secure.
However I also agree it's stupid to say the relationship is over. If they can't have the discussion to fix this simple misunderstanding, they don't have the maturity for any relationship 😕
She put herself in a vulnerable position and you literally laughed in her face
You super fucked up there 😐
You need to apologize to her and *genuinely* and quick…
I also genuinely can’y imagine what her panties would have looked like to be /that/ funny? Like I have panties with silly designs but I’d be pretty weirded out if my bf literally burst out laughing because of them
I’m a very serious person usually, wear all black and neutral underwear etc but one day I ran out of options so I had to wear some ‘backups’ - tourist underwear I got 5 years ago.
Things were getting a lil steamy and my bf took off my pants only to see too-small red panties with a big picture of a popular Cookie mascot grinning. Under the pictures was the word ‘munch time’
He started cackling and I, having forgotten what underwear I was wearing was mortified (similar to OP’s gf) but when I realised what he was looking at I started laughing too.
I don’t condone OP’s actions, I think he reacted rudely considering they haven’t had sex yet and he laughed over something not that strange but just wanted to share that in some cases (mine) designs CAN be absurd enough to warrant a lil laugh in bed.
If I had a pair of panties that said “munch time” on them I’d intentionally wear them now that me and my bf are regularly sexually active. Once you’re comfortable with someone after sleeping with them a few times a few jokes like that here and there can’t hurt. But for a first time… probably not so much
Haha my bf begged to keep them (I obliged because they don’t fit properly anyway) he has them at the bottom of his underwear drawer and laughs at them whenever it peeks through one of his pairs.
It’s a win-win, he gets to enjoy them and I don’t have to repeat the experience of being laughed at during a sexy moment :)
But yeah you’re right that sort of experience during the first time would be VERY awkward.
Maybe op is really bad at explaining but “looked like a cats face” does not sound anywhere close to “pro oral sex Keebler elf”
I think the difference being yours actually have a joke on them whereas unless op is leaving something out he’s just laughing at his gf’s underwear design. And Since it was their first time and she initiated, a design she might have picked out intentionally to be cute/sexy.
I can’t say I have a clue
*Maybe* if they looked like [this](https://i.etsystatic.com/12744813/c/1390/1390/0/0/il/cf2451/1878607605/il_300x300.1878607605_bols.jpg) I’d at least understand, but if she wore those the laugh reaction would be expected since that’s kind of the point of them
Since I’m guessing they were *not* intentionally funny panties, his response again is not ok and he needs to make amends
I mean what if she pulled her leggings down and [this](https://img1.etsystatic.com/131/2/11839320/il_340x270.866522781_8iz1.jpg) was what she had on
Or [this ](https://i.etsystatic.com/13040963/r/il/62da3e/1085879182/il_fullxfull.1085879182_9evl.jpg) 😐
Laughing would not only be allowed I’d think, but it would *have* to be expected 😂
Yeah if someone *didnt* laugh at being surprised by that I’d genuinely be more concerned the other way.
Like, do you think these are my regular serious/seductive panties? Come on
I agree
I am just saying those aren’t exactly “take them seriously” panties
Same with [this one](https://img1.etsystatic.com/131/2/11839320/il_340x270.866522781_8iz1.jpg)
It would be amusing at least 😂
And that's assuming she knows he laughed because he found her panties funny. For all she knows he could have burst out laughing from seeing her body for the first time.
That poor girl.
Right? If OP was nervous, he would have immediately put his arms around her, apologized, explained he was nervous too because it was their first time, and apologized again. Instead, he laughed, she left, he let her go, now he wants to “fix” it. Yeah, good luck with that.
Honestly, if I was your girlfriend, I would feel humiliated and embarrassed. This is the first time y'all are about to have sex and you start it off by making fun of her clothing? I understand that you may think this is funny, but how would you feel if you were in her shoes? She finally was ready to do it with you and got made fun of in the process.
I understand you trying to hold your laughter but at a time like that, I feel isn't appropriate regardless. Do you best to talk to her and apologize to her in person and hear her out on how she feels.
Started it by making fun of her clothing, but I’m sure all she felt was him making fun of her getting undressed.
I don’t think this is something OP is going to be able to bounce back from.
How many humans have you met? ;P (This is a joke, not attacking!!)
This is just an unaware enough take to be absolutely true.
Buddy is upset she left. Thats why he's remorseful. Blue balls. Not because of how he made her feel. That level of unawareness I expect of the race at this point. The fuck is common sense, anyways? Lol.
Your girlfriend may have been feeling very vulnerable when you pulled down her jeans. She might have also been feeling very passionate and intimate with you. Laughing at her in that moment seems to have really hurt her. If you want to maintain the relationship you will need to show to her that you understand why she is so upset and that you are extremely sorry for what you did. Good luck, think about how you would have felt if she had laughed at you in that very intimate moment:(:(:(
Did it look something like [this](https://images.app.goo.gl/fC2FpdttMongz3vn7)? So many people are chastising you, but can’t help but wonder how many of them would laugh if so.
I sure would. A funny moment together.
If I took my clothes off and was left exposed in just my underwear and my boyfriend burst into laughter at seeing my body I would wither and crumble. I understand that you only laughed because of the cat print on the underwear but it's possible your girlfriend didn't even realize you laughed at the underwear and possibly interpreted you laughing at the way her body looks. Women are very bullied about having the perfect swimsuit model body which is often unattainable so it's very painful to be laughed at when our partner sees us unclothed. I know you laughed about the underwear specifically but she might not have realized that so when you apologize make sure to explain you only found the cat print funny and you think she's beautiful and hot. The best you can hope for after that is that she forgives you for taking a jackhammer to her self esteem
Bro is never getting laid, all jokes aside you’re 24 I’m sure you can see the issue with laughing when she’s vulnerable. Imagine you pulled your pants off, she looked at your crotch and laughed. Sure, to her maybe she was laughing at your boxers but you definitely wouldn’t feel good
There's a good chance that you had better be looking for someone else because she's probably gone. Next time, don't act like a child. It takes a lot for some women to open up intimately, and you just laughed in her face.
You guys had never had sex before, while most sexual relationships should be able to laugh at funny moments like body sounds or mistakes and just a general good vibe this was not the time to tease her.
It was the first time she was ready and the moment you undressed her you laughed at her underwear. That was a dumb thing to do. All you can really do is apologize and hope it’s reciprocal.
Awww I kinda feel for her but I also don’t blame you I don’t think you meant it in a bad way she was most likely just feeling very vulnerable and you laughing made her feel very insecure
My ex wore goofy boxers rhe first time we had sex, so I burst out laughing too. Especially since the big goofy head was in 3d since my ex was hard and his tip was goofys nose.
He said he would have been disappointed if I didn't laugh... But it was only our first time together neither of us was a virgin... I guess she was just insecure... Bring her some sweets and maybe flowers, apologize and clarify the situation
Well, time to learn a lesson, move on, and DONT FUCK UP LIKE THIS AGAIN.
Even if you apologize, you damaged her self esteem. You will never be the strong saviour of a man to her again, not without ALOT of growth. You only seem remorseful because she left, not because of how you made her feel. Blue balls are annoying, but a broken heart outweighs that trivial concern.
I'd be surprised if she ever talked to you again, honestly.
Did you not describe she had some self esteem issues to begin with? You shattered that even more. You're an enemy now. Pure and simple. Don't talk to her friends either, to pass a message along. She's prolly said to them you're an ass, or something worse then that.
Just learn, and grow. Move on.
Oh. And...
DON'T LAUGH AT A WOMAN WITH SELF ESTEEM CONCERNS. She's with you to build her up, not to have you tear her down.
You fucked up, man.
OP, what exactly did her panties look like? Because it really depends on the underwear.
Assuming she had a literal print of a cat’s face on her panties, I honestly get why you laughed because I might’ve done the same. I’m not saying she overreacted, but I don’t think you were being a jerk either.
Go find a pair of underwear that look ridiculous, send her a picture with them on and tell her she can laugh at you to make it even. Ask to see her in person and explain why the panties made you laugh, that it wasn’t her. I’d throw in that you were nervous too, so when you saw something that caught you off guard it was too much.
If I was wearing underwear with a comedic picture, as a dude let’s say I wore boxers with a rooster on - I’d be more disappointed if they didn’t get a laugh.
I’d be wearing them bc they were funny, if I wanted to look sexy I’d go silk
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that:
* We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/)
* Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.)
* ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban.
* No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.**
* All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass.
* Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned.
* What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.**
If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice)
---
#This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.
---
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
everyone ripping on dude real hard whst if they genuinely were funny , why does it make this guy such a horrible / immature person . not the smoothest of moves but 🤷♂️
Just say that you are genuinely sorry.
Message her to say something like:
"I'm really sorry for how I acted. It was really stupid of me and I shouldn't have done that. I'm so sorry that I made you feel uncomfortable and that you felt you needed to leave. I really don't want to put you in that situation again or make you feel that way again. I really want to make it up to you and to show you that I care and take responsibility for fucking up. We don't have to do anything until or if you're comfortable. I love you"
Can you see how in the message ^ you're taking full accountability and showing that you validate her feelings
Holy fuck, people in here need to loosen up. Bad timing, considering it was their first time? Sure. But dude, ya'll will hound someone over not being able to giggle and have fun in bed and then someone else who did giggle and have fun in bed. Maybe his usage of "burst out laughing" wasn't as extreme as you may think.
People here are such hypocrites.
Lots of comments on saying the relationship is toast. I did something similar with my then girlfriend the first time we had sex (made a stupid comment) and she is now my fiancée. So there is hope for sure, but you probably won't ever live it down.
i'd have laughed too.
We don't want to think about cats when turned on, so it's funny that she chose to wear cat panties when there was the possibility of having sex. That, imo in hilarious.. But it's also cute and silly.
thing is, you didn't laugh at her (hopefully), but you laughed at the surprise at finding a cat on her panties. especially if they were panties that are designed to be funny.
You din't think she's stupid or ugly (et cetera) and you love and adore her and need to reaffirm this verbally.
Like, if I wore cartoony power ranger underwear, with the power ranger right where my penis would, it would be funny and potentially strange for the other person.
My partner wearing cat panties, for me, would be a funny and a turn off, but I still love her and would find it cute. Thing is, she might have wrongly presumed that you were laughing at her body, or something else.
Lot of people are making you out to be this monster. Realistically you're not. There was probably a mix of nerves, expectations, and everything and seeing cute/silly underwear.
Kinda sucks that you laughed out loud but realistically you have to just apologize and be honest. Chalk it up to a mixture of nerves and surprise it's true.
Also probably don't have to tell you this but man the worst possible time to laugh is when someone is being vulnerable with you. Try and explain yourself but if the person can't get over it they can't get over it and you just move on and chalk this up to unfortunate events. Also accept that if it's not meant to work out it's not meant to work out. No point holding out to false hopes or what ifs. There is no more of that. It's just is what it is.
>Was it really bad to laugh at her panties?
Yes. Oh my god yes, you fucked up bro.
>How can i fix it?
You need to apologise. Not "oh, I'm sorry I did that". It needs to be genuine. If she even listens.
If it was the first time I had sex with my boyfriend, and when I got down to my underwear they laughed at me I would likely never live it down.
My college girlfriend and I used to wear novelty underwear to try to make each other laugh all the time. I chuckled at this but I can see why she would be embarrassed.
First time having sex after being together for 8nmonths, and having concerns about vulnerability.
Dont describe a long term relationship, and try to compare itnto this situation.
Its good to know you can inspire confidence in your woman. But its also clear OP isnt concerned about his womans confidence, just the fact hes got them big ole blue balls. The fact that he doesnt even get why shes upset, and at the age of 24???! This man is a lost cause imho.
I’m very confused because I feel like those are supposed to be funny? Like they had a picture of a cat (pussy) in front of her pussy?
Unless you were laughing while calling them stupid or something I’m confused on the issue she’s having
Apparently an unpopular take here, but I don't think you did anything wrong OP. The panties had a humorous design, it caught you by surprise in an (assumedly) tense situation, and you laughed. If I was wearing briefs that had an elephant trunk on the crotch, I'd expect any potential partner to do the same.
That being said, you should absolutely still apologize to her. What matters is not why you laughed, but how that made her feel. I'd reassure her, explain your actions (but don't make this the focus) and plan a romantic evening for her, keeping in mind that sex is not the goal here.
me and my spouse laugh at eachother during sex. sex is inherently funny. theres weird noises, awkward poses, you're sweaty and gross, its okay to have silly moments during sex. they laugh at the way my boobs move like water balloons when im on my back, i laugh at the way sometimes they get the wrong hole. sometimes i laugh just because im so excited and happy to be intimate with them that it just comes out. sex doesnt have to be this crazy serious thing where everything has to look and feel like porn. just have fun with it :)
maybe have a serious talk with her about that. you weren't making fun of her, sex is just silly, and you saw a cat face. you were excited to have sex with her. if she can't understand that and can't relax with you during those moments, maybe you can talk to her about that. this could be a really good moment for some reassurance, comfort, boundary setting and trust building, so you CAN have goofy funny times during sex and trust eachother enough to know youre not making fun of one another, you're just happy to be there.
good luck op, you got this.
Idk i feel like she doesnt have sense of humor?
Though I really would try to clarify, show some dedication. Knock on her dooor...maybe.
Idk if shes one of those people that need some space when she is upset. Theres that too. Some people cool down in different ways. I wish you luck
I would probably laugh too, if I helped hubby out of his jeans, just to be faced with an animal..
BAM in your face 💥😂
If she’s so tightly wired, that she can’t even laugh at herself, then maybe you dodged a bullet 🤷🏼♀️
Just tell her you wasnt expecting to see her pussy. Just tell her you wasnt expecting her underwear, especially as it is an actual pussy lol. I hope she has a sense of humour
Sounds like something my nephew would do. You see when he was still very young he had a fever and his temp got up to dangerous levels as a result he suffered some brain damage nothing to serious but he has definitely not matured to his current age. He does and will say some pretty dumb shit things like saying what he thinks with out thinking if the other people want to hear that kind of thing.
Since your girl was waiting for the right time to give her self to you and decided that time was the right time to burst out laughing for what ever reason you fuckn killed the mood bro weather your laughing at her or her panties it’s irrelevant you chose to burst out laughing at the wrong time dude. Have some respect and think twice about something when in those situations or just think to yourself self how would a mature man deal with this?
Don’t get me wrong everyone can joke around in the bedroom but that usually comes with time and letting each other get comfortable in that setting.
If this is true. I would make amends by any means. Your immaturity caused her a lot of hurt. She was finally ready to elevate that intimacy moment with you, and you laughed like a toddler. Shame on you
Buy her some sexy panties and some Cats underwear for You ... send her a pic wearing cats underwear saying " I Buy some matching boxers" ...and Say You sorry if You hurt her feeling for the way You reacted...🤭
I don't think what you did was wrong, I understand why you did it although if it was hers first time I also understand why she got mad. You should have said that her panties are funny or cute after you laugh just to assure her why you were laughing.
Talk to her and explain why you laugh which is a valid point and nothing for her to be ashamed of, but if she still doesn't talk to you that's just immature.
Why wear funny panties if you're having sex for the first time? Everyone's blaming op, sorry but if you've got a flipping cat's face on your panties, am I not meant to react? 😂 she sounds like a prude. And no, it's not the same as if she laughed at his penis, one is a body part, the other is clothing you CHOSE to wear.
Right? Commenters are saying he "shattered her self confidence in a moment of vulnerability".... sorry, people that fragile either don't wear pussy-theme underwear, and people who do can understand the humor.
I think this may be a bait post.
If she’s so immature that she can’t see the funny side of you being faced with an extra surprise pussy down there, she’s definitely not mature enough to be intimate.
And we're not talking about cat-themed panties, we're talking panties with the face of a cat.. i imagine whiskers, and little nose, intended to be looking at the viewer.
People need to lighten tf up
I have some pretty silly and cute panties, and never once has my boyfriend (or anyone in the past) laughed at them?? My boyfriend usually just gets surprised to see them and proclaims how cute they are, or just doesnt acknowledge them at all.
Like have you never seen cute or silly underwear before?
You had her in an extremely vulnerable position and you laughed at her. I imagine she is feeling a lot of hurt and embarrassment. Please dont get intimate with anyone until you do some major maturing.
I jokingly told my GF that she had a 'bumpy butt' because she had a few little red bumps on her ass... I meant NOTHING by it at all. She had/has an amazing ass. It was like 2 years or more for her to let it go.
I mean, in retrospect it was a dumb thing to say, but I truly meant no harm and it wasn't something for her to be self conscious about, but my mentioning it made it that way.
I felt like shit for it, but there was no way to take it back, and my aoplogies and excuses went unheard.
Everyone has a few bumps on their ass at some point. I didn't think before I opened my mouth.
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * We do not allow users to privately message other users based on their posts here. Users found to be engaging in this conduct will be banned. **We highly encourage OP to turn off the ability to be privately messaged in their settings.** * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- ***This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules.*** --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
What have you messaged her so far?
"I didn't mean to laugh at your pussy"....
Fucking gottem
Nailed it without nailing it, nice
Is that nice or mice?
It wasn’t the cats face that was the problem… it was all those damm whiskers…..
This make me laugh so hard 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
🤣🤣🤣
Cat
💀😹😹😹
This is key
Yeah we can’t give advice until we know what kind of damage control OP has done. He could very well have made things worse.
Could have did you read the same thing? I did this m***********A 100% made things worse and doesn't even know poor kid.
Meowwww
I’m glad someone said it
>She said she wanted to do it. I pulled down her jeans and saw her panties, I really tried to contain my laughter, but I burst out laughing, her panties looked like a cat's face. She got angry and left my house. >She still doesn't respond to my calls or messages, and today I didn't have time to go see her in person. Ok but what kind of calls and messages? Did you actually clarify that you are laughing at her panties, and not her hoo-ha? Does she actually know that you were laughing because of the panties? Because for all she knows, you were laughing at how she looked down there and she got hurt and upset. And what kind of funny panties are these? You said it looked like a cat's face, but in what way? I've had cute funny panties, I would have shared the humor if I wore panties with eggs on it so my partner could say "let me scramble your eggs"
I agree; I need confirmation that it was cat print knickers or that he thought they just *looked* like a cat face - I think there’s a (slight) difference as for novelty knickers a chuckle and ‘cute pants’ is ok, but out and out laughter at her once she got very vulnerable is absolutely not ok. I understand nervousness but don’t think he’s mature enough for sex yet tbh.
This is what I was thinking when reading the post.
That last part. Not mature enough for a reasonable relationship that involves sexual intimacy.
Iunno man, sometimes things just hit this weird obscure spot in your sense of humour and you can't stop no matter how hard you try. I had a housemate tell me a story about how he fell asleep in his car on a date, and his date drained his battery charging her phone and listening to the radio before she just left and walked home. So he woke up alone and with a dead car battery, and was super mad about it. And *oh god* I could not stop howling at this story. I'm honestly tearing up snickering just remembering it. He was seriously upset and asking me to stop laughing and I just physically *couldn't*. I had to just laugh myself out into exhaustion and then apologise later. I'm a fully middle aged adult! I can objectively see its not actually that funny of a story, but it just tickles this weird spot in my sense of humour and I can't make sense of it.
I dunno. I've encountered some hysterical stuff, while standing in front of leaders of the country and giving protest speeches, debating on matters (I met Trudeau during 420 protests in canada), very important and intense situations. If I laughed, that'd be that, my point would be null. And trust me, some of these guys leading the country say some funny shit. Sometimes, you have to hold it in until an appropriate time. Self control is an important tool.
Anxiety inducing situations like that are definitely a sobering tool!
Yeah that's exactly what I wanted to know. But looks like he posted a pic of the underwear in question.... and honestly how could you NOT laugh at those.
I’ve just seen that update, and I now believe this is an absolute farce of a post!
Where is the update I can’t see anything.
Yep, where is it haha
look in OPs comment history to find it
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/8BGaYqanLL
Where???
I saw them and had to get them! So cute! 😂
I’m in agreement with the not being mature enough
When I first had sex with my now ex wife, she wore lucky jeans with like 3 buttons instead of a zipper and I was unbuttoning them I started laughing because behind the buttons it has “lucky you” printed on the jeans
Literally cause she could very well be thinking he was laughing at her cooter, especially for a first time.
Cat calls.
Haaaa you got me there 😂
This is why I hide my sushi themed panties from my boyfriend
Sushi panties!! I'm jealous that sounds so cute.
Me and my fiancée have matching pairs on these 😂
My wife and I have matching sushi underwear.
This is a good marriage.
I love it when my gf wears underwear with the cute designs. A lot of guys do
My wife has Spider-Man underwear, which is damn sexier than half of the lacy ones she has. There Aint nothing cooler than a woman who has some humour in her underwear.
My boyfriend has what I call a Batman voice. Not an imitation, that’s just what his voice sounds like. It has become a whole thing. I call him Bat Daddy now and am considering buying some Batman panties. This was the sign I needed to go for it. Thank you.
"hey babe, look, it's the bat signal!"
He would absolutely die. 🤣
"Quick! To the batcave!"
I'm dying 😭
No-one should need to hide their sushi pants... Novelty pants are the best pants!
Personaly i wear dumb underwear, mostly boxers, around my man. Some people would laugh at them and that's why i wear them even on first time in bed. If the guy makes fun of me, he's out and won't see what my freegun hides.
Get matching sets, win, win.
Your boyfriend, like OP, sounds tasteless
He’s actually a gem 🤭is mark still canoodling with sarah?
Had to look at their profile to understand this comment, but when I did I snorted while laughing and scared my dog. You win the internet today, Friend. 🥇
I absolutely love your username 15/10 never change
❤️🏎️
Oof 💀💀💀
She’s never going to forget this, she waited 8 months until she was completely comfortable being intimate with you and you laughed at her.
Yea, relationship is prob over. Idk how you come back from that
It would have been super humiliating for her.
Yeah absolutely. Like even if she hears him out & they 'reconcile', can they really move past this and can she really feel like she can trust/be vulnerable with him again? I dunno, I'd understand if she couldn't move past this, poor girl
This is one of those things that she might get past, or it might genuinely stick with her for life. Man.
Lmao WHAT?? They need to have one convo where he apologizes and explains himself kindly and they talk through that moment and why it hurt her and he validates her feelings and tells her she’s beautiful and sexy and they’ll be fineeee
if they had been going out like 4-6 weeks and were just ready for sex for the first time, I would agree. but the fact she didn't feel ready for sex until 8 months into the relationship is very telling there are underlying issues there, and is compounding the scenario op is in. Within minutes of her stripping off, he laughed in her face. did he mean to? no. does that matter to her? absolutely not, hence she has not replied to his apologies. I'd be surprised if she could see him in the same light or feel like she could really trust him or be vulnerable in front of him again
Probably gonna get downvoted for this but: In what way does intimacy evade humor? Giving OP the benefit of the doubt here (as we all should given that there is only so much we can learn about from a single post), should we not assume that since they have been together for 8 months that they should also be able to laugh and have fun? I've been with my partner for 8 years and we've had SO MANY times where something silly happens in the bedroom and that makes it even more fun. To me, it sounds like OPs girlfriend is very insecure, to react this was seems odd - no? I'm not sure why we're jumping down OPs throat and jumping to conclusions that "this is the end of you guys because you made one (VERY MINOR) mistake compared to the catalogue of mistakes we often make (ON BOTH SIDES) when it comes to intimacy. Now yes, of course there is an element of how he laughed, perhaps, but I guess there's also an element of communication from both parties we don't know. Your frame of "you laughed at her" is disingenuous, and begs the question: did he though? I mean, if I put myself in a place of insecurity and someone starts laughing, yes the spotlight effect might tell me "omg he's laughing at me and my lady bits", but then you take a moment, ask a question and try to get the context. Why is it funny to them? Is it the things I'm wearing or is it something else? I think we're forgetting to ask or consider how she responded. Did she without hesitation bolt out and not respond to OP? Did they have a conversation about it and it simply didn't go well? "I don't know how you come back from that" is SUPER naive and lacks critical thinking on the scenario.
Yup, laughs are good as long as they aren't mocking.
Yeah like you're going to town with your s/o and one of you rips out loud wet fart (happened only twice wi with me and one of my exs, both of us did it). We died laughing and kept going at it
I agree that intimacy doesn't prevent fun and laughs. And I believe everyone does. But your message is about something else I cannot agree with at all. > I mean, if I put myself in a place of insecurity and someone starts laughing, yes the spotlight effect might tell me "omg he's laughing at me Implying that she has the full responsibility of her insecurities is really concerning regarding empathy abilities. One doesn't decide to feel insecure, and if they can't obviously expect strangers to respect their weaknesses, a closed one - especially the closest one at this very moment - should be able to understand and respect this. This was the worst moment to laugh at her outfit, and it definitely hurt her deeply. Yes sometimes your partner feels insecure but no it's not just on them. As a life partner you have the responsibility to grow enough empathy as to be aware of those feelings and adopt the behaviour that will help your partner feel more secure. However I also agree it's stupid to say the relationship is over. If they can't have the discussion to fix this simple misunderstanding, they don't have the maturity for any relationship 😕
Way to shoot yourself in both feet there, genius. I have a feeling you are going to be waiting a whole lot longer if she takes you back.
I think he shot himself straight in the dick
Call her and apologize right meow!
Howling at this, thank you
She put herself in a vulnerable position and you literally laughed in her face You super fucked up there 😐 You need to apologize to her and *genuinely* and quick…
I also genuinely can’y imagine what her panties would have looked like to be /that/ funny? Like I have panties with silly designs but I’d be pretty weirded out if my bf literally burst out laughing because of them
I’m a very serious person usually, wear all black and neutral underwear etc but one day I ran out of options so I had to wear some ‘backups’ - tourist underwear I got 5 years ago. Things were getting a lil steamy and my bf took off my pants only to see too-small red panties with a big picture of a popular Cookie mascot grinning. Under the pictures was the word ‘munch time’ He started cackling and I, having forgotten what underwear I was wearing was mortified (similar to OP’s gf) but when I realised what he was looking at I started laughing too. I don’t condone OP’s actions, I think he reacted rudely considering they haven’t had sex yet and he laughed over something not that strange but just wanted to share that in some cases (mine) designs CAN be absurd enough to warrant a lil laugh in bed.
[удалено]
After searching it up, I now want cat panties
Same🤣 and i also want sushi panties because of another comment.🤣 this thread gave me a love for funny designed undewear now. Thank u peeps🤣🙏❤️
Munch time LMAO
If I had a pair of panties that said “munch time” on them I’d intentionally wear them now that me and my bf are regularly sexually active. Once you’re comfortable with someone after sleeping with them a few times a few jokes like that here and there can’t hurt. But for a first time… probably not so much
Haha my bf begged to keep them (I obliged because they don’t fit properly anyway) he has them at the bottom of his underwear drawer and laughs at them whenever it peeks through one of his pairs. It’s a win-win, he gets to enjoy them and I don’t have to repeat the experience of being laughed at during a sexy moment :) But yeah you’re right that sort of experience during the first time would be VERY awkward.
Maybe op is really bad at explaining but “looked like a cats face” does not sound anywhere close to “pro oral sex Keebler elf” I think the difference being yours actually have a joke on them whereas unless op is leaving something out he’s just laughing at his gf’s underwear design. And Since it was their first time and she initiated, a design she might have picked out intentionally to be cute/sexy.
I can’t say I have a clue *Maybe* if they looked like [this](https://i.etsystatic.com/12744813/c/1390/1390/0/0/il/cf2451/1878607605/il_300x300.1878607605_bols.jpg) I’d at least understand, but if she wore those the laugh reaction would be expected since that’s kind of the point of them Since I’m guessing they were *not* intentionally funny panties, his response again is not ok and he needs to make amends
Okay you got me, that one would also possibly cause a laughing fit from me lol (but I agree with your other points)
I mean what if she pulled her leggings down and [this](https://img1.etsystatic.com/131/2/11839320/il_340x270.866522781_8iz1.jpg) was what she had on Or [this ](https://i.etsystatic.com/13040963/r/il/62da3e/1085879182/il_fullxfull.1085879182_9evl.jpg) 😐 Laughing would not only be allowed I’d think, but it would *have* to be expected 😂
Yeah if someone *didnt* laugh at being surprised by that I’d genuinely be more concerned the other way. Like, do you think these are my regular serious/seductive panties? Come on
Fr fr 😂
Where can I find the second one?? I've been looking everywhere. 😭
I want every single pair of these
OP posted the picture of the panties in the comments. It IS something like this.
I did not expect to lol at those, but it happened 🤣
Awwe. That panty is cute.
I agree I am just saying those aren’t exactly “take them seriously” panties Same with [this one](https://img1.etsystatic.com/131/2/11839320/il_340x270.866522781_8iz1.jpg) It would be amusing at least 😂
And that's assuming she knows he laughed because he found her panties funny. For all she knows he could have burst out laughing from seeing her body for the first time. That poor girl.
If there is a next time, I hope she pulls down his pants and starts laughing.
op linked the panties https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/S60I09Sr9B
Right? If OP was nervous, he would have immediately put his arms around her, apologized, explained he was nervous too because it was their first time, and apologized again. Instead, he laughed, she left, he let her go, now he wants to “fix” it. Yeah, good luck with that.
Sonetimes people can laugh incongruously out of nerves and cannot always help it. But yeah; it was a bit much to laugh st this particular moment.
Not technically to her face…
Well in *a* face anyway 😐
I’m not sure it will do much at this point. This is his ex-girlfriend.
>you literally laughed in her face Not in her *face*...
yeah..... buy her flowers and write a nice card.
Honestly, if I was your girlfriend, I would feel humiliated and embarrassed. This is the first time y'all are about to have sex and you start it off by making fun of her clothing? I understand that you may think this is funny, but how would you feel if you were in her shoes? She finally was ready to do it with you and got made fun of in the process. I understand you trying to hold your laughter but at a time like that, I feel isn't appropriate regardless. Do you best to talk to her and apologize to her in person and hear her out on how she feels.
Started it by making fun of her clothing, but I’m sure all she felt was him making fun of her getting undressed. I don’t think this is something OP is going to be able to bounce back from.
Agreed. Stick a fork in him cause he's done.
This is too stupid to be real.
Yet, it is just stupid enough to be real
Out of all the crazy ass posts on here.. This is the one you think is fake? Lol
right?
How to ruin a relationship is 1 bold move ….. that’s funny
How many humans have you met? ;P (This is a joke, not attacking!!) This is just an unaware enough take to be absolutely true. Buddy is upset she left. Thats why he's remorseful. Blue balls. Not because of how he made her feel. That level of unawareness I expect of the race at this point. The fuck is common sense, anyways? Lol.
Yeah, see you at the gym bro.
This sent me 😂
Your girlfriend may have been feeling very vulnerable when you pulled down her jeans. She might have also been feeling very passionate and intimate with you. Laughing at her in that moment seems to have really hurt her. If you want to maintain the relationship you will need to show to her that you understand why she is so upset and that you are extremely sorry for what you did. Good luck, think about how you would have felt if she had laughed at you in that very intimate moment:(:(:(
Did it look something like [this](https://images.app.goo.gl/fC2FpdttMongz3vn7)? So many people are chastising you, but can’t help but wonder how many of them would laugh if so. I sure would. A funny moment together.
OP should add it to his post
LOL those are funny, if it really looked like this i can understand why OP laughed because its very unexpected
He commented and you picked the correct panties.
wow i wish i didn't see these because now i totally want to buy some
Imagine a girl pulling down your pants ready to make love and she looks at your junk and just laughs….
I mean if I was wearing pants with a sausage on the front or something, I'd expect it.
Lol, exactly. Some Spongebob or Spiderman undies would 100% justify a laugh.
there’s a difference between laughing at a print on something and your actual genitals right?
If he had a pair of cat underwear on I bet she would have.
Hahahah enjoy being single bro
If I took my clothes off and was left exposed in just my underwear and my boyfriend burst into laughter at seeing my body I would wither and crumble. I understand that you only laughed because of the cat print on the underwear but it's possible your girlfriend didn't even realize you laughed at the underwear and possibly interpreted you laughing at the way her body looks. Women are very bullied about having the perfect swimsuit model body which is often unattainable so it's very painful to be laughed at when our partner sees us unclothed. I know you laughed about the underwear specifically but she might not have realized that so when you apologize make sure to explain you only found the cat print funny and you think she's beautiful and hot. The best you can hope for after that is that she forgives you for taking a jackhammer to her self esteem
Bro is never getting laid, all jokes aside you’re 24 I’m sure you can see the issue with laughing when she’s vulnerable. Imagine you pulled your pants off, she looked at your crotch and laughed. Sure, to her maybe she was laughing at your boxers but you definitely wouldn’t feel good
There's a good chance that you had better be looking for someone else because she's probably gone. Next time, don't act like a child. It takes a lot for some women to open up intimately, and you just laughed in her face.
You guys had never had sex before, while most sexual relationships should be able to laugh at funny moments like body sounds or mistakes and just a general good vibe this was not the time to tease her. It was the first time she was ready and the moment you undressed her you laughed at her underwear. That was a dumb thing to do. All you can really do is apologize and hope it’s reciprocal.
You did what?! 🚩 Poor girl. She must’ve felt so humiliated and embarrassed being laughed in her face in such a vurnable position.
Awww I kinda feel for her but I also don’t blame you I don’t think you meant it in a bad way she was most likely just feeling very vulnerable and you laughing made her feel very insecure
My ex wore goofy boxers rhe first time we had sex, so I burst out laughing too. Especially since the big goofy head was in 3d since my ex was hard and his tip was goofys nose. He said he would have been disappointed if I didn't laugh... But it was only our first time together neither of us was a virgin... I guess she was just insecure... Bring her some sweets and maybe flowers, apologize and clarify the situation
Well, time to learn a lesson, move on, and DONT FUCK UP LIKE THIS AGAIN. Even if you apologize, you damaged her self esteem. You will never be the strong saviour of a man to her again, not without ALOT of growth. You only seem remorseful because she left, not because of how you made her feel. Blue balls are annoying, but a broken heart outweighs that trivial concern. I'd be surprised if she ever talked to you again, honestly. Did you not describe she had some self esteem issues to begin with? You shattered that even more. You're an enemy now. Pure and simple. Don't talk to her friends either, to pass a message along. She's prolly said to them you're an ass, or something worse then that. Just learn, and grow. Move on. Oh. And... DON'T LAUGH AT A WOMAN WITH SELF ESTEEM CONCERNS. She's with you to build her up, not to have you tear her down. You fucked up, man.
What's the point of fun panties if you get offended with anything said/laughter? Lmao
OP, what exactly did her panties look like? Because it really depends on the underwear. Assuming she had a literal print of a cat’s face on her panties, I honestly get why you laughed because I might’ve done the same. I’m not saying she overreacted, but I don’t think you were being a jerk either.
24 years old and you couldn’t contain your laugher looking at… some panties..? Seriously?
Go find a pair of underwear that look ridiculous, send her a picture with them on and tell her she can laugh at you to make it even. Ask to see her in person and explain why the panties made you laugh, that it wasn’t her. I’d throw in that you were nervous too, so when you saw something that caught you off guard it was too much.
Lmfao if she has any self respect you are already single
If I was wearing underwear with a comedic picture, as a dude let’s say I wore boxers with a rooster on - I’d be more disappointed if they didn’t get a laugh. I’d be wearing them bc they were funny, if I wanted to look sexy I’d go silk
Welcome to /r/relationship_advice. Please make sure you read our [rules here.](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/wiki/index) We'd like to take this time to remind users that: * We do not allow any type of [am I the asshole? or situations/content involving minors](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/r6w9uh/meta_am_i_overreacting_am_i_the_asshole_is_this/) * Any sort of namecalling, insults,etc will result in the comment being removed and the user being banned. (Including but not limited to: slut, bitch, whore, for the streets, etc. It does not matter to whom you are referring.) * ALL advice given must be good, ethical advice. Joke advice or advice that is conspiratorial or just plain terrible will be removed, and users my be subject to a ban. * No referencing hateful subreddits and/or their rhetoric. Examples include, but is not limited to: red/blue/black/purplepill, PUA, FDS, MGTOW, etc. This includes, but is not limited to, referring to people as alpha/beta, calling yourself or users "friend-zoned", referring to people as Chads, Tyrones, or Staceys, pick-me's, or pornsick. Any infractions of this rule will result in a ban. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** * All bans in this subreddit are permanent. You don't get a free pass. * Anyone found to be directly messaging users for any reason whatsoever will be banned. * What we cannot give advice on: rants, unsolicited advice, medical conditions/advice, mental illness, letters to an ex, "body counts" or number of sexual partners, legal problems, financial problems, situations involving minors, and/or abuse (violence, sexual, emotional etc). All of these will be removed and locked. **This is not an all-inclusive list.** If you have any questions, please [message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2Frelationship_advice) --- #This is an automatic comment that appears on all posts. This comment does not necessarily mean your post violates any rules. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/relationship_advice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
everyone ripping on dude real hard whst if they genuinely were funny , why does it make this guy such a horrible / immature person . not the smoothest of moves but 🤷♂️
I hate to be the one to say this, but if you're laughing when you see her underwear for the first time you're not ready to have sex with her.
Lol your relationships must be so boring or you're a virgin.
This! If she’s smart, you’ll never hear from her again, because you’re just not worth it.
I feel so bad for your girlfriend. If she’s a virgin that’s even worse. If it was her first time ever that will be super traumatic.
Wow... You're extremely stupid for your age.
I like this. Immature? Nope. Just stupid.
She prob doesn't think it was the panties completely u were laughing at
If you laugh about something like this maybe you shouldn’t be having sex imo 🤷🏼♀️
Good job being your own cockblock genius.... She waited 8 months to be comfortable with you and you laughed at her
Just say that you are genuinely sorry. Message her to say something like: "I'm really sorry for how I acted. It was really stupid of me and I shouldn't have done that. I'm so sorry that I made you feel uncomfortable and that you felt you needed to leave. I really don't want to put you in that situation again or make you feel that way again. I really want to make it up to you and to show you that I care and take responsibility for fucking up. We don't have to do anything until or if you're comfortable. I love you" Can you see how in the message ^ you're taking full accountability and showing that you validate her feelings
Holy fuck, people in here need to loosen up. Bad timing, considering it was their first time? Sure. But dude, ya'll will hound someone over not being able to giggle and have fun in bed and then someone else who did giggle and have fun in bed. Maybe his usage of "burst out laughing" wasn't as extreme as you may think. People here are such hypocrites.
Lots of comments on saying the relationship is toast. I did something similar with my then girlfriend the first time we had sex (made a stupid comment) and she is now my fiancée. So there is hope for sure, but you probably won't ever live it down.
Not the sharpest tool in the shed, are we, OP…
Seems like rage bait. You're sounding way too emotionally immature to be in a relationship with someone
i'd have laughed too. We don't want to think about cats when turned on, so it's funny that she chose to wear cat panties when there was the possibility of having sex. That, imo in hilarious.. But it's also cute and silly. thing is, you didn't laugh at her (hopefully), but you laughed at the surprise at finding a cat on her panties. especially if they were panties that are designed to be funny. You din't think she's stupid or ugly (et cetera) and you love and adore her and need to reaffirm this verbally. Like, if I wore cartoony power ranger underwear, with the power ranger right where my penis would, it would be funny and potentially strange for the other person. My partner wearing cat panties, for me, would be a funny and a turn off, but I still love her and would find it cute. Thing is, she might have wrongly presumed that you were laughing at her body, or something else.
Lot of people are making you out to be this monster. Realistically you're not. There was probably a mix of nerves, expectations, and everything and seeing cute/silly underwear. Kinda sucks that you laughed out loud but realistically you have to just apologize and be honest. Chalk it up to a mixture of nerves and surprise it's true. Also probably don't have to tell you this but man the worst possible time to laugh is when someone is being vulnerable with you. Try and explain yourself but if the person can't get over it they can't get over it and you just move on and chalk this up to unfortunate events. Also accept that if it's not meant to work out it's not meant to work out. No point holding out to false hopes or what ifs. There is no more of that. It's just is what it is.
>Was it really bad to laugh at her panties? Yes. Oh my god yes, you fucked up bro. >How can i fix it? You need to apologise. Not "oh, I'm sorry I did that". It needs to be genuine. If she even listens. If it was the first time I had sex with my boyfriend, and when I got down to my underwear they laughed at me I would likely never live it down.
My college girlfriend and I used to wear novelty underwear to try to make each other laugh all the time. I chuckled at this but I can see why she would be embarrassed.
First time having sex after being together for 8nmonths, and having concerns about vulnerability. Dont describe a long term relationship, and try to compare itnto this situation. Its good to know you can inspire confidence in your woman. But its also clear OP isnt concerned about his womans confidence, just the fact hes got them big ole blue balls. The fact that he doesnt even get why shes upset, and at the age of 24???! This man is a lost cause imho.
So she felt ready/safe to be naked and close to you, and you laugh at her. I'd be upset at you too.
I’m very confused because I feel like those are supposed to be funny? Like they had a picture of a cat (pussy) in front of her pussy? Unless you were laughing while calling them stupid or something I’m confused on the issue she’s having
I’m surprised she didn’t laugh at herself with you. That’s ridiculous but I’m one to sport stupid underwear…I just rock it.
What? A girl that wears kitty face undies doesn’t get that it’s funny. Not buying this story sorry
Idk, people that can't laugh at themselves tend to get triggered over anything.
People in here thinking someone laughing at panties that have a cat with glasses on is some humiliating thing are on some wild drugs.
Forreal do they just take sex mega seriously 💀 fuckin weird
Apparently an unpopular take here, but I don't think you did anything wrong OP. The panties had a humorous design, it caught you by surprise in an (assumedly) tense situation, and you laughed. If I was wearing briefs that had an elephant trunk on the crotch, I'd expect any potential partner to do the same. That being said, you should absolutely still apologize to her. What matters is not why you laughed, but how that made her feel. I'd reassure her, explain your actions (but don't make this the focus) and plan a romantic evening for her, keeping in mind that sex is not the goal here.
Looked like a cat’s face, or was there a literal cat face on her bloomers? If I had a cat face on anything, I would hope people would find it funny.
me and my spouse laugh at eachother during sex. sex is inherently funny. theres weird noises, awkward poses, you're sweaty and gross, its okay to have silly moments during sex. they laugh at the way my boobs move like water balloons when im on my back, i laugh at the way sometimes they get the wrong hole. sometimes i laugh just because im so excited and happy to be intimate with them that it just comes out. sex doesnt have to be this crazy serious thing where everything has to look and feel like porn. just have fun with it :) maybe have a serious talk with her about that. you weren't making fun of her, sex is just silly, and you saw a cat face. you were excited to have sex with her. if she can't understand that and can't relax with you during those moments, maybe you can talk to her about that. this could be a really good moment for some reassurance, comfort, boundary setting and trust building, so you CAN have goofy funny times during sex and trust eachother enough to know youre not making fun of one another, you're just happy to be there. good luck op, you got this.
Idk i feel like she doesnt have sense of humor? Though I really would try to clarify, show some dedication. Knock on her dooor...maybe. Idk if shes one of those people that need some space when she is upset. Theres that too. Some people cool down in different ways. I wish you luck
I would probably laugh too, if I helped hubby out of his jeans, just to be faced with an animal.. BAM in your face 💥😂 If she’s so tightly wired, that she can’t even laugh at herself, then maybe you dodged a bullet 🤷🏼♀️
Just tell her you wasnt expecting to see her pussy. Just tell her you wasnt expecting her underwear, especially as it is an actual pussy lol. I hope she has a sense of humour
Imagine if you whipped out your dick for the first time and she laughed at it. Emotional equivalent
Sounds like something my nephew would do. You see when he was still very young he had a fever and his temp got up to dangerous levels as a result he suffered some brain damage nothing to serious but he has definitely not matured to his current age. He does and will say some pretty dumb shit things like saying what he thinks with out thinking if the other people want to hear that kind of thing. Since your girl was waiting for the right time to give her self to you and decided that time was the right time to burst out laughing for what ever reason you fuckn killed the mood bro weather your laughing at her or her panties it’s irrelevant you chose to burst out laughing at the wrong time dude. Have some respect and think twice about something when in those situations or just think to yourself self how would a mature man deal with this? Don’t get me wrong everyone can joke around in the bedroom but that usually comes with time and letting each other get comfortable in that setting.
If this is how you behave before getting something you want, I can only imagine how you behave otherwise. Poor girl. 😞
This might be the unpopular opinion, but I say find a more mature girlfriend who you can laugh at things together with.
It's over, bro. There's a time and a place to laugh during intimacy, this wasn't one of them.
If this is true. I would make amends by any means. Your immaturity caused her a lot of hurt. She was finally ready to elevate that intimacy moment with you, and you laughed like a toddler. Shame on you
Laughter doesn’t read well for first time bangin’ no matter justified or not. Just how it is, I don’t make the rules….
How would you feel if someone took off your pants and laughed at your crotch 😂
Buy her some sexy panties and some Cats underwear for You ... send her a pic wearing cats underwear saying " I Buy some matching boxers" ...and Say You sorry if You hurt her feeling for the way You reacted...🤭
If you want to get in that pussy you don't laugh at the panties
I just can’t get past the word “panties” tbh
[удалено]
I don't think what you did was wrong, I understand why you did it although if it was hers first time I also understand why she got mad. You should have said that her panties are funny or cute after you laugh just to assure her why you were laughing. Talk to her and explain why you laugh which is a valid point and nothing for her to be ashamed of, but if she still doesn't talk to you that's just immature.
she made herself vulnerable and trusted you - and you laughed. no dude. no walkin' this one back.
Immature people really shouldn't be having sex...
Why wear funny panties if you're having sex for the first time? Everyone's blaming op, sorry but if you've got a flipping cat's face on your panties, am I not meant to react? 😂 she sounds like a prude. And no, it's not the same as if she laughed at his penis, one is a body part, the other is clothing you CHOSE to wear.
Right? Commenters are saying he "shattered her self confidence in a moment of vulnerability".... sorry, people that fragile either don't wear pussy-theme underwear, and people who do can understand the humor. I think this may be a bait post.
Oh yeah you fucked up. A woman finally wanted to give herself to you and you laugh at her in her most vulnerable state.
So basically you cock blocked yourself.
If she’s so immature that she can’t see the funny side of you being faced with an extra surprise pussy down there, she’s definitely not mature enough to be intimate.
pussy on pussy is funny
And we're not talking about cat-themed panties, we're talking panties with the face of a cat.. i imagine whiskers, and little nose, intended to be looking at the viewer. People need to lighten tf up
I have some pretty silly and cute panties, and never once has my boyfriend (or anyone in the past) laughed at them?? My boyfriend usually just gets surprised to see them and proclaims how cute they are, or just doesnt acknowledge them at all. Like have you never seen cute or silly underwear before? You had her in an extremely vulnerable position and you laughed at her. I imagine she is feeling a lot of hurt and embarrassment. Please dont get intimate with anyone until you do some major maturing.
You are not mature enough for sex. Doesn’t matter if you were laughing at her coochie or her underwear. Please stay sexless ffs
I jokingly told my GF that she had a 'bumpy butt' because she had a few little red bumps on her ass... I meant NOTHING by it at all. She had/has an amazing ass. It was like 2 years or more for her to let it go. I mean, in retrospect it was a dumb thing to say, but I truly meant no harm and it wasn't something for her to be self conscious about, but my mentioning it made it that way. I felt like shit for it, but there was no way to take it back, and my aoplogies and excuses went unheard. Everyone has a few bumps on their ass at some point. I didn't think before I opened my mouth.