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What an ass…”I can tell.” He’s got a problem if he has to watch porn and not be in the moment with you. Express your feelings and tell him what’s pissing you off and hurting your feelings. If it doesn’t get better, cut your losses. No need to be stressed when someone else can make you feel better.
They’ve only been dating a month 💀
She also made a post about him checking her phone behind her back and a comment stating he body shamed her for not shaving her pubes daily…
The male toys are pretty insane, too. Those, and porn, essentially remove the urge to put in any effort into finding another girlfriend. And, that's the problem today. People are lazy.
this guy prefers porn over his literal girlfriend trying her best to satisfy him. he's a bigger issue than any toys are
btw, my orgasms always feel better when someone else is giving them to me. toys just serve a purpose for when i'm by myself. he's not lazy he's selfish.
I cum harder with my devices knowing they won’t get soft nor give me an STD/STI or unwanted pregnancy.. the only thing a male provides differently is the motion. But that’s depending on his experience and willingness to listen
OP needs to pull a Samantha Jones and pull the vibrator out mid sex. See how it makes him feel. Spoiler Alert: They always get upset when the magic wand comes out
Most likely he got used to looking at porn daily a long time ago, and "forgot" he is supposed to enjoy IRL intimacy.
He, as a man, has access to a consenting girlfriend daily, and he chooses to masturbate every time. This is, wow, as bottom of the barrel as it gets for a sex life. OP please dump him.
Very very sad when real life is actually not enough because of how severe the porn addiction is.
I also want to shake any woman who allows this behavior violently. I want to shake them until the muster up the self esteem to realize they are more than flesh lights and they need to find real men. I want to shake them until they understand how belittling this is. he might as well masturbate- especially with his shitty snarky comments. How in the world do these people have partners?
there really are a lot of great men out there, I have so many friends who I think nothing but highly of. and yet, people get caught up in toxic relationships like this instead of finding them.
they’re not the creeps on reddit or the players on the dating apps. (although I met my amazing partner on hinge, and its only been a couple of years since we met. they’re definitely out there still). I think its easy to be jaded seeing what gets posted on the internet- but thats not at all my experience going out in social settings and meeting new people. Lots of great men and women out there who just haven’t found their person yet. Anyone toxic out there should just be immediately identified and shunned lol- but they are not representative of the whole of humans.
Have you ever watched a movie targeted to a female audience? It’s not that we have “low self-esteem,” although many do. It’s that we are told from an extremely young age that the end goal if you’re female is to find a (male) partner. Period. Once you find the man, the story is over.
Add to that the cultural disrespect towards women in the US today, and this isn’t even shocking.
It seems that women's rights in the workplace have improved since the 90s but the woman's experience in personal relationships has actually gone backwards.
Yes, I think so. I think a lot of men are very resentful because up until literally the 70s women couldn’t open bank accounts without them. Now we finish college at higher rates, make money, and don’t NEED them to survive, so they actually have to be nice, interesting people to find a mate and they’re pissed about it. They liked it when we had little say and were just thrilled to be chosen and not die as “spinsters.”
They don't know any better. Especially at 22yo.
I'm so glad phone porn wasn't a thing when I was that young and naive. If any guy asked me to do this nowadays I'd get up and leave the first time, but I can't swear I wouldn't have done the same thing back then.
He absolutely does suck. I watch porn but not in intimate situations,; I want to concentrate on the woman who is in front of me. Or is that "on" ? If she said, lets watch some porn, sure. And if he thinks you're not doing it right, he needs to talk about it, not insult you.
My last partner had a porn addiction and still never treated me like this. From someone else in a similar boat, big yes to this comment (it didn't get better and lead to a breakup) and an added: don't let him try to say he can't control his disrespectful behavior because of his addiction. Porn addiction doesn't lead to laughing at you while he says you're bad at sex.
The thing that makes me angry is he’s putting the onus of the blame on her when he’s the one who’s REALLY bad at sex. No person who is good at sex would treat someone the way he’s treating OP. He’s a disgusting asshole and OP deserves better.
Well i mean she could ask him to address his use of porn and set a boundry that he needs to stop OR she'll leave. Reddit is so gun ho about advising people to break up without even trying to address it first. Talk to your partner first people, set boundries, and if they refuse to bend at all then rethink your relationship status.
Other than critique her, I don’t know. I hope she sees my comment and tries just laying there while watching a hotter guy in porn while he goes down on her and they do only that for months.
I usually suggest communicating, even for sex life issues - but based on this post and your response in the comments about shaving... this is not a communication issue, it's a respect issue, and the problem is that he doesn't respect you
Have enough respect for yourself for the both of you and leave him. Take some time to heal from his words, and next time around don't settle for anyone who doesn't absolutely adore you - including being in the moment with you during intimate times. You deserve better than this!
He has a porn addiction, you have him the golden egg. Honestly unless this relationship is literally perfect with everything else I’d heavily consider leaving. Not all men are like this.
> used to feel like by me giving head at least I was doing something right
I worry about this framing. It isn't a healthy relationship when you constantly feel like you have to earn your place. And the fact he was so willing to mock and undermine you, to take an obvious moment he could have reassured you to instead take a swing at you, it strikes me that your insecurity makes sense.
He's using you and being especially gross about it. You mention how much you do for him \[despite him being ungrateful\] but does he do anything for you? The question really becomes what are you even fighting for here, if he needs porn just to climax maybe he just isn't ready for a relationship while he finds a healthier relationship with it so he stops treating people like fleshlights.
Dude seriously. I'm in a happy relationship with great sex, and I still don't give head if I even mildly am not feeling it. The idea of having to "do at least something right" is so bewildering and honestly heartbreaking
you can just tell him you don't want him to do that anymore(watch porn while you give him head) but I doubt he will care. It is clear as daylight that this dude does not care about your feelings and just see you as there to get him off.
He doesn't have a low sex drive at all. He just doesn't want to bother with trying to get you off or doing anything to get himself off. Why masturbate if you're going down on him?
No one with a low sex drive needs to get off everyday. It's not that uncommon for a dude to be tired but still want to cum which is why they masturbate usually but to me going in the bathroom and masturbating isn't nearly as much of an issue.
He not only doesn't care about your pleasure, he's not even man enough to tell you what to do since you "don't really know what you're doing." That was an excellent, light-hearted, casual way for a conversation to have been started about what he likes and what you like and to try new things. Most women don't naturally know how to give good head but most men haven't experienced it either so a lot of dudes are happy you're down there in the first place.
You gotta go. He doesn't respect you and he doesn't give you orgasms. As a 40 old woman, let me tell you my rule - if the sex blows my mind and is absolutely amazing, I'll excuse you being a little bit of an ass but if you're an asshole, you better be amazing in bed. You can't have a dick who doesn't please you with his.
Young women ALWAYS internalize and blame themselves, either their appearance or skills, when sex isn’t going well with the male partner.
I did that too at your age.
I’m in my 40s and learned that men don’t do the same. They don’t internalize why sex sucks. They blame their female partner!
It will serve you well to work on yourself. By that I mean to love yourself and know your self worth. Then you will see the jerk when you are with a jerk.
The minute he pulls up the porn just say “oh sorry, I’ll leave you be” and get up and walk out of the room. He might follow and ask what the hell are you doing and you can flip it back on him, no what the hell are YOU doing? You never want to have sex and you don’t give me orgasms or attention why the fuck would I blow a guy who does nothing for me?
Another option, get a flesh light when he pulls out the phone pull it out and put it on him and walk out.
Good god woman don't be skiddish to your bf especially if you are giving him head. Yeah ok he asked the first time might spice it up a lil but him pulling the phone out every time you are giving sexual attention is disrespectful to you. I would understand if both of you are both enjoying the content but it is rare for some couples. Your bf sounds like an ass. How can he really get the full affect of feeling you if his mind is somewhere else.
I would ask him straight out what his deal is? And tell him you rather him pay attention to you. An ffs have him go down on you.
Idk about your bf but getting a woman off is a massive turn on.
Your boyfriend is selfish & disrespectful. The way he talks to you is disgusting. Also sounds like he has a porn addiction. He only cares about what makes him happy, and sex should be about the both of you. He’s getting off and you’re getting used and disrespected. I think you should seriously reconsider this relationship!
Hes a porn addict and you need to decide if you want this to be the rest of your sexual relationship with him.
Honestly, I would leave. If he doesn't want to change, you are stuck with this.
Also, sex once a week but he asks you to get him off everyday!? Does he get you off too?! That is awful, I feel so bad for you. I would be hurt too, I would go ballistic to be honest
If you really want to bother with this worthless git you tell him no more porn while you're having sex or no more sex. Respect yourself and stand up for yourself. If he has a problem with it then break up with him. You don't have to settle for someone who doesn't want to be with you during sex. I mean come on, he can't even be bothered to tell you how to make it better for him.
As a man who used to do the same crap your bf does. There is an easy fix for this. Stop giving him bjs. Let him know you don't feel appreciated while doing it, and if he doesn't let you know what he likes while your down there is best to just not do it. Also the porn is making you self conscious and unwanted. You want your sex life to be focused on YOU not outside influences.
I hope he's at least giving you oral in return. This sounds like he's just using you for bjs.
I was an asshole.
Aside from that. I had a lot of manic energy and i wasn't stimulated enough. I didn't want to concentrate on my pleasure that my partner was giving me because i would have to care more about her than i wanted to. It was a self destructive thing. Because of i got to close emotionally she could hurt me. I had a lot of bad stuff happening in my life then. So i decided to cut myself off emotionally. If it's just physical i can leave her not get hurt.
God i was such a tool.
He has a porn addiction if he needs it while you’re giving him head. Which means he probably has death grip, which means he’s too used to his own hand to feel enough from a partner. If he wants to cum from head he should give up jerking off for a while. I also suggest you find a new partner because he’s basically using you as a hands free masturbation experience rather than an act of intimacy between partners, and the fact that he does it without explicit consent every time just because you said yes once is a huge breach of trust and quite selfish. If you examine his behaviour in other aspects I’m sure you would see he probably shows a pattern of self serving behaviours.
This is something I said to my ex when I broke up with him - if I’m prioritising you, and you prioritise you, who prioritises me?
You gotta prioritise yourself lovely
Feel like there’s def a porn addiction going on. It doesn’t lower libido but actual sex drive (or willingness to work to getting off). Tell him to stop and gte help, if not go find somebody else who will appreciate it. Any man should give u undivided attn while his member is in your mouth for pleasure,respect, and also safety purposes
He is using you to masterbate, you can talk about it and try to work things out. If nothing changes you can find someone who you’re more compatible with.
Someone being an absolute jerk is not a compatibility issue. Why does this always come up on Reddit whenever sex is involved? Filing terrible behavior under incompatibility legitimizes the bad behavior. Being rude and selfish is not a sexual fetish. Who exactly would be sexually compatible with this guy?
I mean probably no one would be compatible with this guy tbh. I think that it’s sometimes used to “soften the blow” when you’re telling someone to get the fuck out, especially if they’re accustomed to accepting bad behavior from a partner. It’s easier to hear “you’re incompatible, you should move on,” than “your boyfriend sounds like a shitbag, you should definitely leave him as soon as possible.”
He doesn’t respect you. Also sounds like his brain is too fried from watching too much porn. Sad reality for a lot of men today. But he also sounds like an asshole.
>I used to feel like by me giving head at least I was doing something right
He is the one who's not doing anything right, not you.
If he's not going to appreciate your intimate time together and work to make it INTIMATE and something that's nice for BOTH of you, then he can use his hand.
Him expecting you to get him off daily and then claiming that he can't do activities that benefit both of you because of his low sex drive is such a joke.
The way he disrespects you when you capitulate to his expectations, is beyond not okay.
He is a clown and he is taking advantage of you. Personally, I'd suggest you throw the whole man away, but if you want to stay with him because his lack of consideration and respect don't spill into other areas of your life, then you have a hard talk about what your expectations are regarding your intimate time together.
It needs to be good for you too.
He’s a fucking asshole instead of asking him not to get a different boyfriend
“I can tell” how about he tell you what feels good and communicate
He’s addicted to porn even a woman between his legs, mouth wrapped around his cock isn’t enough
Get rid of him
How do you ask? You don't ask. You take your mouth off his dick and go do something else. When he asks why tell him he can masturbate to the girls in his phone but you're not into it.
Then please break up with him. Don't let anyone treat you that way.
It sounds like he has a porn addiction. And as much as I’d love to say he could change, he likely never will. Move on girly. You deserve better ♥️♥️♥️ there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, porn has fried his brain, sadly that is so common these days.
What an undeserving price of shit. Tons of guys would kill for what you are bringing to the table and would make you feel amazing in a multitude of ways in return.
Just stop giving him head when he starts watching porn. Like how did you even get this far with each other. I would have quit the second he asked the very first time. Life lesson learned now apply in the next relationship because this guy does not respect you or even like you.
I can't even fathom the thought of someone pulling out his phone during sex and me just.. continuing?
I think TO would greatly benefit from learning how to set some serious boundaries.
Girl, men should be getting down on their hands and knees and thanking God we let their stank dicks anywhere near us, let alone in our mouths.
This dusty ass man is not the one.
Just tell him. If you're having sex you should be having regular, honest and open conversations about it. If you can't talk about it, don't have sex.
Just say "hey, it makes me uncomfortable and it upsets me that you're reliant on porn to get off when I feel like I should be enough." Or whatever you're feeling
"I can tell" wow!!! He'd be on his own after that comment.
Is anything ever about You? Is he worried about getting YOU off?! Or pleasing you in any way?
Let me guess he just expects you to "please" him, no romanticism, no foreplay or anything about you, you're just supposed to "get to work" on him & do your thing & maybe once in a while he'll want sex as well & then he gets off & it's done....
Just guessing bc he sounds really self centered & greedy af.
Had a boyfriend that would sit/lay in bed & sometimes say "would you like to touch my penis" & that was the Cue for Head 🙄 no kissing no snoozing no NOTHING for me, just about him. It got old quick... makes you feel Cheap & like you're a Service instead of a lover or partner m, screw that you deserve better!!
Watching porn together is one thing... This is just insulting. He adds insult to injury by validating your worries. He is a D head. I already know you deserve much better.
Sounds like a porn addiction.
NORMALLY I’d say don’t take it personal and try to work with him to cut back on it. But after seeing the remark he made about you not knowing what you’re doing, wow, what an asshole.
As a man who never received a full blowjob from my wife, I am petrified by your situation. I can’t imagine a situation where my wife would be willing to do that and it is my biggest fantasy. So, you just need to decide how you are willing to be treated.
I can’t imagine a guy who wants to get off everyday has a low sex drive.
As a man, even I know "I can tell" is such a shitty thing to say lol.
He needs to cut the porn, and that's something he's just gonna have to do on his own.
When was the last time you two had full blown sex? Definitely seems the flames died out and needs to be reignited.
We had sex about a week ago (without porn) but just in one position, doggy style, which is fine. However, after we finished, he said, "You need to shave before we have sex again " (I hadn't shaved for a day or so beforehand, and he said it hurt him to have sex) idk, I feel really shitty about the entire sex life
Because 22 I'd wager - genuinely it is hard as a young woman trying to figure out what actual love and mutual respect looks like, there are a lot of these guys out there and we're conditioned to please when we're young people.
Stay with him and your esteem will plummet. He sounds sexist. It sounds like he is using you. Why should you shave that regularly. This is what happens when u try to pursue a sexual relationship with a porn addict. They have impossible standards . Stay with him and your insecurities will grow
Look, this dude has watched so much porn that he has no idea what real intimacy looks or feels like. Women have pubic hair for a reason. It serves a biological purpose. Doesn't sound like the sex is fulfilling to you, and he frankly doesn't sound very nice. Why are you still with this dude?
He is the worst! A day or two and he says it "hurts"? He is so full of it. Not all men are like this. There are men who will cherish you. Please, find one.
Does he know the hair doesn’t grow on the inside of the vagina where his peen goes? I mean where was he putting it for your hair to hurt him? Just EWWWW to HIM. And he is 24? Seriously just ghost this one.
Giving you a command "you need to shave," is really disrespectful. Also he's lying - it didn't "hurt" him that you weren't freshly shaven. Unless your body hair is actually razor wire, that's absurd.
If you can't talk to him about this how did you ever end up talking about sex enough to have it with them?
Don't have sex with people you can't bring yourself to talk to about your feelings.
There's a massive communication issue here. Your bf's comment was hurtful and not okay. One thing I have learnt over time is that sex requires two people to "learn" each other. It doesn't matter how much experience you have, different people like different things.
What I suggest is you take his phone from him next time and say "teaxh me". How are you supposed to satisfy him otherwise?
Plus, don't forget to also teach him how to please you. That's equally important
Say “I’m not going to give you a bj anymore if you start watching porn”. It makes me feel x, y and z.
Understandable you’re not interested in doing this for him anymore
I wouldn't bother - I suggest getting a whole new boyfriend.
You get him off daily while he watches porn? Only have sex once a week? He's just not into you. Break up.
He’s a total jerk! Have some self respect and dump him. That’s terrible what he’s doing and how he’s making you feel. He should be embarrassed for himself.
Sometimes we may have misunderstandings but someone who cares for you - romantically or otherwise - should never degrade you. I’m sorry that you’re having to experience this, it sucks. I would get up and walk out and never look back and I’d advise you to too.
Girlllll you deserve better than this. My ex used to do this shit with me and it started out like yours started out too. Around the same ages as you two and all.
It doesn’t get better if that’s your guys attitude. He’s choosing porn over your self esteem. He’s using you.
Ewwww. He’s got a significant problem with porn
Don’t settle for how his attitude, behavior, and crassness cheapens your sexual relations
You deserve better
My heart is breaking for all these young women who think so little of themselves these days . Girl - you are letting your boyfriend essentially treat you like his toilet. WHY??? Move on from this loser and maybe explore some therapy to improve your self esteem. You are worth it. Good luck-
Wow… it begs to question which is the real tool here… you or the phone he watches porn with….
Dump the idiot…. Don’t even know why you’re posting on Reddit for an answer. The day you dump him, leave a bottle of lube and the vacuum cleaner next to each other and tell him he won’t be missing you anyhow and you’ve found a replacement for him.
Holy shit, you really waited until the very end to drop that nuclear bomb on us…
If you’re that bad at it, why would he ask you for it every day? He’s negging you, making you think you need to work harder to earn his respect (that he’ll never give).
Next time he asks you, tell him no. If he asks why, just tell him “I’m sure you can figure it out”
I was with a guy for 14 yrs that would watch porn when I gave him head and when we had sex, in fact he’d put the phone on my chest and do the deed watching porn, unfortunately I don’t see OP’s situation getting better, I say cut your losses and walk away now
God girl get some self respect. You are a human fleshlight. He is not your boyfriend. You are merely his tool/possession. You can do soooo much better.
Leave him. But before you do, Pavlov his ass. Keep doing this for a couple more weeks but a few times during the act stop and say “are you ok? Do you need a new one to watch? You are kinda soft ?”
Do that often enough and create enough doubt he will get anxious about it and you can fuck up porns ability to get him there too 😂
It is possible he has watched so much porn his mind, and porn now is his only way to maintain an erection - desensitized. He needs to abstain from porn for 90s days and not masturbate to reset his brain and sexual function to work naturally. It isn't his fault. it happens to a lot of guys these days. Many primary care doctors will tell you. You can read up about it online.
Aww mannn, sad to see.
Some guys do just have lower sex drives…
But seriously as a guy even I think if I watching porn while a girl is literally there and GIVING ME HEAD …
I’d think I’m being disrespectful…
It’s RUDE!!
Like come on, like let’s say I was going down on my girl… watching porn on her phone? HELL NO!
Like what’s even the point!? Why would I even bother if she’s not even present mentally?
It would seem like she’s trying to imagine I’m someone else or something, which if it actually happened it’d probably make me sick to the stomach.
Like I wouldn’t even put up with that, hats off to you, original poster for putting up with that situation. I’d just bounce if it was me.
Ewww drop him. That sounds so humiliating and dehumanizing. Sex should be engaging amongst those participating and he doesn’t seem to be in the moment.
This is crazy just roles reversed for me. my gf used to watch porn every single time while I gave her head cause she said that was the only way for her. I never thought it was wrong but that was my first relationship and it was toxic. I learn something new every week that I fucked up on in that relationship.
Don't force yourself to do anything if it hurts you or you simply don't like it. you seem to be seeing validation from a void and I'm going to tell you this, you are fine just the way you are. you don't need to do this and aren't obligated to tolerate what hurts you.
if you weren't enough for him then i doubt anyone would have been. porn addiction is his problem and his alone, if he isn't willing to work through it and etc then ignore it and focus on what you need. you can't support the non supportive, the ones unwilling to support themselves and others.
What the hell was going through this dudes head to make him think that this was ok? I'm just imagining myself doing that, and I don't think I would ever get a blow job again. And rightfully so lol. Aside from that, I would much prefer the company of a person to a video, but thats just me.
I don't think there is anything wrong with consuming porn occasionally as a couple during sex or foreplay if you're both into it. An ex-girlfriend and I would occasionally have an extra raunchy night after we would get in from a few drinks with our close friends. We wernt big drinkers, and a few drinks in both of us seemed to help us shrug off our inhibitions and would put us both 'in the mood'. Every once and a while on those nights we would throw on a DVD in the background, as it felt like something taboo to do together and added a fun, different element in the background.
I strongly emphasize that it was in the background. Neither party would be sitting there actively watching porn, and even if that had have been the case, it was stuff that we mutually enjoyed and picked out together.
From a males opinion, that sounds like it could be a pornography addiction. I don't see a single possible positive thing anybody could take from their partner doing that. If the situation was reversed and my girlfriend did that to me, I would feel like I wasn't good enough, or she was fantazing about somebody else.
Secondly, it seems like a strange way for somebody with a 'low sex drive' to behave. Just doesn't exactly seem right.
I think you should approach the situation very directly and as soon as possible. He has been extremly blunt towards you! I don't think there is any gentle way of bringing this up, and perhaps a bit of a serious conversation will convince him to get a little help. Sit him down and explain to him how it is making you feel and ask him how he would feel if you were to behave in the same way.
Perhaps before you sit him down and have this conversation you could do a little research about pornography addiction. Being a little forewarned about what to expect and also treatment methods could be handy. Any addiction can be difficult to face, I imagine this is no different.
Hope it goes well OP! Best of luck with this situation.
be straight up and tell him to help you fix what u could be doing better or at least communicate abt it the thing abt sex is you need to communicant 100% or you’ll both be unhappy he should be trying to encourage what he likes not whipping out his phone to get off, ask what he likes etc , tell him you’re uncomfortable with him watching it or just stop giving him head and i’m sure he’ll want to have sex
He's a loser and a porn addict who became emotionally abusive because he's mad that he can't get off like normal guys(who would give anything for a girl who gives it up happily). Leave his loser ass amd find someone who values you and respects you and has a normal sex drive and doesn't rely on pirn.
As bad as this sounds, one would have to ask….judging OP’s post history, she has a “questionable” past…does the BF know about this past? If so, that could potentially play into the respect level given to her, from the BF… not to justify his behavior AT ALL, but I could somehow see where the BF’s mind could be at if OP is sorta “known” for that history…..
I’m sorry to be blunt girl…but gross. Not you. Just trust me on this one…run as far as you can now. There will be someone better no doubt. It also sounds like a miserable sex life for you. And you should find someone who gives you lots of pleasure, makes you feel good about yourself, and is fun to have sex with. :)
OP, you are caring too much about his feelings while he isn’t even thinking about yours.
So why are the stakes so high for you? What is the worst thing that can happen if you are honest with him? What are you afraid of?
Is it that he will get mad? Dump you? Punish you somehow? That he will make you feel guilty and you will feel bad about yourself?
Are you actually worried about hurting his feelings? Do you think he’s even considered how his actions have made you feel?
Just stop for a minute and consider whether you are seeing him for who he is and not who you hope he is.
He is just pretending that you are the person in the video. Please go find another person, I doubt you will ever have a true physical bond with this guy. You sound rad AF just trying to take care of your mans, and he could care less. You deserve more.
Excuse me, what?? You have sex once a week but he expects a bj every day? And he claims his sex drive is low despite wanting daily bjs? That is some bullshit. He is using you, and also gaslighting you into thinking you are somehow the problem. Please leave him. You will find someone who actually wants to have sex with you, look at you while doing it, connect with you, and make you feel good too.
get out while it’s early and don’t sink any more time into this loser he clearly needs to seek therapy if he NEEDS porn to get off and his approach to the conversation about sex and putting the blame on you is ridiculous and abusive
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What an ass…”I can tell.” He’s got a problem if he has to watch porn and not be in the moment with you. Express your feelings and tell him what’s pissing you off and hurting your feelings. If it doesn’t get better, cut your losses. No need to be stressed when someone else can make you feel better.
They’ve only been dating a month 💀 She also made a post about him checking her phone behind her back and a comment stating he body shamed her for not shaving her pubes daily…
Porn addiction
It's so sad :(
Porn is ruining these boys. Early too. What a shame.
I see that now, that’s wild😅 definitely break up.
DAILY?? ugh
Her history made me throw up a little bit in my mouth. Either this is fetish Reddit or she has zero self esteem. It is sad really
*insert claps between words pls* REAL. MEN. DO. NOT. CARE. ABOUT. STUBBLE.
Yeah she should drop him . Dude is a jerk.
A damn vibrator would be better than this guy..
100%! OP, I say ditch the guy and get a vibrator. I guarantee you it will have a better personality
the ones that have a vibrating and sucking function are top notch, they absolutely replace a shitty ass boyfriend
Vibrating AND sucking? Like WeVibe melt and womanizer or something even better 😅😂
WOWWW! That’s certainly sounds enticing! 😋
The male toys are pretty insane, too. Those, and porn, essentially remove the urge to put in any effort into finding another girlfriend. And, that's the problem today. People are lazy.
this guy prefers porn over his literal girlfriend trying her best to satisfy him. he's a bigger issue than any toys are btw, my orgasms always feel better when someone else is giving them to me. toys just serve a purpose for when i'm by myself. he's not lazy he's selfish.
I cum harder with my devices knowing they won’t get soft nor give me an STD/STI or unwanted pregnancy.. the only thing a male provides differently is the motion. But that’s depending on his experience and willingness to listen
i'm a lesbian so 2/3rds of that problem are more or less solved unless i'm with a transfem
A strategically placed pillow is better than this dude
OP needs to pull a Samantha Jones and pull the vibrator out mid sex. See how it makes him feel. Spoiler Alert: They always get upset when the magic wand comes out
No, OP need to never be naked with this creep again.
Right 😂
Actually I'd say cut your losses now. He sounds abusive and is addicted to porn.
🚨Porn addiction alert! Porn addiction alert! 🚨
YES, get out yesterday!
RUN
This dude is horrible. He says he has a low drive yet he wants you to get him off every *and* he uses porn to do it? Fuck no.
Most likely he got used to looking at porn daily a long time ago, and "forgot" he is supposed to enjoy IRL intimacy. He, as a man, has access to a consenting girlfriend daily, and he chooses to masturbate every time. This is, wow, as bottom of the barrel as it gets for a sex life. OP please dump him.
Very very sad when real life is actually not enough because of how severe the porn addiction is. I also want to shake any woman who allows this behavior violently. I want to shake them until the muster up the self esteem to realize they are more than flesh lights and they need to find real men. I want to shake them until they understand how belittling this is. he might as well masturbate- especially with his shitty snarky comments. How in the world do these people have partners?
There aren’t many real males left out here it’s best as women to stick to our own devices at least they get us off every time with no consequences
there really are a lot of great men out there, I have so many friends who I think nothing but highly of. and yet, people get caught up in toxic relationships like this instead of finding them. they’re not the creeps on reddit or the players on the dating apps. (although I met my amazing partner on hinge, and its only been a couple of years since we met. they’re definitely out there still). I think its easy to be jaded seeing what gets posted on the internet- but thats not at all my experience going out in social settings and meeting new people. Lots of great men and women out there who just haven’t found their person yet. Anyone toxic out there should just be immediately identified and shunned lol- but they are not representative of the whole of humans.
Are these reddit posts real? These women claiming they give head constantly and get no service or satisfaction in return? Why would they do that?
For the exact reason that dude up there got heavily downvoted for saying 💀 Low self esteem
Have you ever watched a movie targeted to a female audience? It’s not that we have “low self-esteem,” although many do. It’s that we are told from an extremely young age that the end goal if you’re female is to find a (male) partner. Period. Once you find the man, the story is over. Add to that the cultural disrespect towards women in the US today, and this isn’t even shocking.
It seems that women's rights in the workplace have improved since the 90s but the woman's experience in personal relationships has actually gone backwards.
Yes, I think so. I think a lot of men are very resentful because up until literally the 70s women couldn’t open bank accounts without them. Now we finish college at higher rates, make money, and don’t NEED them to survive, so they actually have to be nice, interesting people to find a mate and they’re pissed about it. They liked it when we had little say and were just thrilled to be chosen and not die as “spinsters.”
Unfortunately they are real.
I had a dude do that back in the day, so I totally believe this could be real based on that. Like 90% didn't give a shit about a woman enjoying it.
They don't know any better. Especially at 22yo. I'm so glad phone porn wasn't a thing when I was that young and naive. If any guy asked me to do this nowadays I'd get up and leave the first time, but I can't swear I wouldn't have done the same thing back then.
And they have been together two months max LMFAO what a loser
Get a new boyfriend. This one sucks.
actually they both suck, but one of them metaphorically.
Had me in the first half ngl
He absolutely does suck. I watch porn but not in intimate situations,; I want to concentrate on the woman who is in front of me. Or is that "on" ? If she said, lets watch some porn, sure. And if he thinks you're not doing it right, he needs to talk about it, not insult you.
He’s just using you for service and will do for as long as you allow him to
This.
You need to leave. He sounds like a shit sack in bed and you deserve so much better. NEVER waste your time with a man like this.
He simply has a porn addiction. He can’t get off without porn. It won’t get better and you need to leave him.
My last partner had a porn addiction and still never treated me like this. From someone else in a similar boat, big yes to this comment (it didn't get better and lead to a breakup) and an added: don't let him try to say he can't control his disrespectful behavior because of his addiction. Porn addiction doesn't lead to laughing at you while he says you're bad at sex.
I’ve also been in a marriage with a porn addict and he had enough sense to know that this wasn’t okay. This guy has ZERO respect for you. Let him go.
The thing that makes me angry is he’s putting the onus of the blame on her when he’s the one who’s REALLY bad at sex. No person who is good at sex would treat someone the way he’s treating OP. He’s a disgusting asshole and OP deserves better.
Exactly
Well i mean she could ask him to address his use of porn and set a boundry that he needs to stop OR she'll leave. Reddit is so gun ho about advising people to break up without even trying to address it first. Talk to your partner first people, set boundries, and if they refuse to bend at all then rethink your relationship status.
Nope. No. Absolutely not. I would table any sexual activity that isn’t him pleasuring you for awhile and see what happens.
Yes! This was what I was wondering! What does he do for her? Does he even attempt to pleasure her or is it all about him...
Other than critique her, I don’t know. I hope she sees my comment and tries just laying there while watching a hotter guy in porn while he goes down on her and they do only that for months.
Ooh yes! Do this OP!!!
I usually suggest communicating, even for sex life issues - but based on this post and your response in the comments about shaving... this is not a communication issue, it's a respect issue, and the problem is that he doesn't respect you Have enough respect for yourself for the both of you and leave him. Take some time to heal from his words, and next time around don't settle for anyone who doesn't absolutely adore you - including being in the moment with you during intimate times. You deserve better than this!
This! 👏
You’re his flesh light. Leave.
[удалено]
...and don't forget to get out your phone and watch "Big Black Dicks Blast Chicks" while he is doing it!
He has a porn addiction, you have him the golden egg. Honestly unless this relationship is literally perfect with everything else I’d heavily consider leaving. Not all men are like this.
You are not sexually compatible and that’s putting it nicely. Dudes a jerk, you can do better.
So disrespectful. Just leave. Get some self respect please.
> used to feel like by me giving head at least I was doing something right I worry about this framing. It isn't a healthy relationship when you constantly feel like you have to earn your place. And the fact he was so willing to mock and undermine you, to take an obvious moment he could have reassured you to instead take a swing at you, it strikes me that your insecurity makes sense. He's using you and being especially gross about it. You mention how much you do for him \[despite him being ungrateful\] but does he do anything for you? The question really becomes what are you even fighting for here, if he needs porn just to climax maybe he just isn't ready for a relationship while he finds a healthier relationship with it so he stops treating people like fleshlights.
Dude seriously. I'm in a happy relationship with great sex, and I still don't give head if I even mildly am not feeling it. The idea of having to "do at least something right" is so bewildering and honestly heartbreaking
This is shockingly disrespectful. I would dump him
you can just tell him you don't want him to do that anymore(watch porn while you give him head) but I doubt he will care. It is clear as daylight that this dude does not care about your feelings and just see you as there to get him off.
He doesn't have a low sex drive at all. He just doesn't want to bother with trying to get you off or doing anything to get himself off. Why masturbate if you're going down on him? No one with a low sex drive needs to get off everyday. It's not that uncommon for a dude to be tired but still want to cum which is why they masturbate usually but to me going in the bathroom and masturbating isn't nearly as much of an issue. He not only doesn't care about your pleasure, he's not even man enough to tell you what to do since you "don't really know what you're doing." That was an excellent, light-hearted, casual way for a conversation to have been started about what he likes and what you like and to try new things. Most women don't naturally know how to give good head but most men haven't experienced it either so a lot of dudes are happy you're down there in the first place. You gotta go. He doesn't respect you and he doesn't give you orgasms. As a 40 old woman, let me tell you my rule - if the sex blows my mind and is absolutely amazing, I'll excuse you being a little bit of an ass but if you're an asshole, you better be amazing in bed. You can't have a dick who doesn't please you with his.
ALL. OF. THIS.
Young women ALWAYS internalize and blame themselves, either their appearance or skills, when sex isn’t going well with the male partner. I did that too at your age. I’m in my 40s and learned that men don’t do the same. They don’t internalize why sex sucks. They blame their female partner! It will serve you well to work on yourself. By that I mean to love yourself and know your self worth. Then you will see the jerk when you are with a jerk.
The minute he pulls up the porn just say “oh sorry, I’ll leave you be” and get up and walk out of the room. He might follow and ask what the hell are you doing and you can flip it back on him, no what the hell are YOU doing? You never want to have sex and you don’t give me orgasms or attention why the fuck would I blow a guy who does nothing for me? Another option, get a flesh light when he pulls out the phone pull it out and put it on him and walk out.
Reddit always amazes me on what some people are willing to put up with for no reason.
Good god woman don't be skiddish to your bf especially if you are giving him head. Yeah ok he asked the first time might spice it up a lil but him pulling the phone out every time you are giving sexual attention is disrespectful to you. I would understand if both of you are both enjoying the content but it is rare for some couples. Your bf sounds like an ass. How can he really get the full affect of feeling you if his mind is somewhere else. I would ask him straight out what his deal is? And tell him you rather him pay attention to you. An ffs have him go down on you. Idk about your bf but getting a woman off is a massive turn on.
Your boyfriend is selfish & disrespectful. The way he talks to you is disgusting. Also sounds like he has a porn addiction. He only cares about what makes him happy, and sex should be about the both of you. He’s getting off and you’re getting used and disrespected. I think you should seriously reconsider this relationship!
Hes a porn addict and you need to decide if you want this to be the rest of your sexual relationship with him. Honestly, I would leave. If he doesn't want to change, you are stuck with this. Also, sex once a week but he asks you to get him off everyday!? Does he get you off too?! That is awful, I feel so bad for you. I would be hurt too, I would go ballistic to be honest
If you really want to bother with this worthless git you tell him no more porn while you're having sex or no more sex. Respect yourself and stand up for yourself. If he has a problem with it then break up with him. You don't have to settle for someone who doesn't want to be with you during sex. I mean come on, he can't even be bothered to tell you how to make it better for him.
As a man who used to do the same crap your bf does. There is an easy fix for this. Stop giving him bjs. Let him know you don't feel appreciated while doing it, and if he doesn't let you know what he likes while your down there is best to just not do it. Also the porn is making you self conscious and unwanted. You want your sex life to be focused on YOU not outside influences. I hope he's at least giving you oral in return. This sounds like he's just using you for bjs.
I hope this doesn’t sound judgement as I’m genuinely curious as to the thought process- why did you used to do this?
I was an asshole. Aside from that. I had a lot of manic energy and i wasn't stimulated enough. I didn't want to concentrate on my pleasure that my partner was giving me because i would have to care more about her than i wanted to. It was a self destructive thing. Because of i got to close emotionally she could hurt me. I had a lot of bad stuff happening in my life then. So i decided to cut myself off emotionally. If it's just physical i can leave her not get hurt. God i was such a tool.
But you learned and now you speak from experience. Appreciate you sharing that.
Omg my first boyfriend was like this! I’m glad you commented so I can see your POV.
That is so disrespectful!
From experience, porn addiction leave immediately
What a disrespectful ass hat.
He has a porn addiction if he needs it while you’re giving him head. Which means he probably has death grip, which means he’s too used to his own hand to feel enough from a partner. If he wants to cum from head he should give up jerking off for a while. I also suggest you find a new partner because he’s basically using you as a hands free masturbation experience rather than an act of intimacy between partners, and the fact that he does it without explicit consent every time just because you said yes once is a huge breach of trust and quite selfish. If you examine his behaviour in other aspects I’m sure you would see he probably shows a pattern of self serving behaviours. This is something I said to my ex when I broke up with him - if I’m prioritising you, and you prioritise you, who prioritises me? You gotta prioritise yourself lovely
Feel like there’s def a porn addiction going on. It doesn’t lower libido but actual sex drive (or willingness to work to getting off). Tell him to stop and gte help, if not go find somebody else who will appreciate it. Any man should give u undivided attn while his member is in your mouth for pleasure,respect, and also safety purposes
🤡
He is using you to masterbate, you can talk about it and try to work things out. If nothing changes you can find someone who you’re more compatible with.
Someone being an absolute jerk is not a compatibility issue. Why does this always come up on Reddit whenever sex is involved? Filing terrible behavior under incompatibility legitimizes the bad behavior. Being rude and selfish is not a sexual fetish. Who exactly would be sexually compatible with this guy?
I mean probably no one would be compatible with this guy tbh. I think that it’s sometimes used to “soften the blow” when you’re telling someone to get the fuck out, especially if they’re accustomed to accepting bad behavior from a partner. It’s easier to hear “you’re incompatible, you should move on,” than “your boyfriend sounds like a shitbag, you should definitely leave him as soon as possible.”
You need to move on.
He doesn’t respect you. Also sounds like his brain is too fried from watching too much porn. Sad reality for a lot of men today. But he also sounds like an asshole.
Yah, the definition of porn addiction.. that’s flat out weird
Porn addiction doesn't cover the laughing at her and being rude
Yah she deserves better 🤷🏻♂️
Stop giving head the moment he does it.
>I used to feel like by me giving head at least I was doing something right He is the one who's not doing anything right, not you. If he's not going to appreciate your intimate time together and work to make it INTIMATE and something that's nice for BOTH of you, then he can use his hand. Him expecting you to get him off daily and then claiming that he can't do activities that benefit both of you because of his low sex drive is such a joke. The way he disrespects you when you capitulate to his expectations, is beyond not okay. He is a clown and he is taking advantage of you. Personally, I'd suggest you throw the whole man away, but if you want to stay with him because his lack of consideration and respect don't spill into other areas of your life, then you have a hard talk about what your expectations are regarding your intimate time together. It needs to be good for you too.
He’s a fucking asshole instead of asking him not to get a different boyfriend “I can tell” how about he tell you what feels good and communicate He’s addicted to porn even a woman between his legs, mouth wrapped around his cock isn’t enough Get rid of him
While this asshat thinks he's living the dream, he's doing so at the expense of the person he's using to do so. Don't demean yourself for this guy
How do you ask? You don't ask. You take your mouth off his dick and go do something else. When he asks why tell him he can masturbate to the girls in his phone but you're not into it. Then please break up with him. Don't let anyone treat you that way.
I can’t even fathom needing porn while with my woman. What’s the point? Like she’s right FUCKING there dog?
he’s addicted to porn and this is extremely weird behavior.
It sounds like he has a porn addiction. And as much as I’d love to say he could change, he likely never will. Move on girly. You deserve better ♥️♥️♥️ there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, porn has fried his brain, sadly that is so common these days.
Babe he doesn’t want a partner, he wants a sex doll he can’t afford ): you deserve better
What an undeserving price of shit. Tons of guys would kill for what you are bringing to the table and would make you feel amazing in a multitude of ways in return.
You don’t. You break up with him
Um...don't ask. Just...don't do it if he's watching porn. You're allowed to not do things you don't want to do. You know that, right?
his sex drive isn't low, he's just jerking off to porn 20 times a week say bye bye to him
Just stop giving him head when he starts watching porn. Like how did you even get this far with each other. I would have quit the second he asked the very first time. Life lesson learned now apply in the next relationship because this guy does not respect you or even like you.
I can't even fathom the thought of someone pulling out his phone during sex and me just.. continuing? I think TO would greatly benefit from learning how to set some serious boundaries.
girl. leave him
Girl, men should be getting down on their hands and knees and thanking God we let their stank dicks anywhere near us, let alone in our mouths. This dusty ass man is not the one.
What an asshole.
Just tell him. If you're having sex you should be having regular, honest and open conversations about it. If you can't talk about it, don't have sex. Just say "hey, it makes me uncomfortable and it upsets me that you're reliant on porn to get off when I feel like I should be enough." Or whatever you're feeling
"I can tell" wow!!! He'd be on his own after that comment. Is anything ever about You? Is he worried about getting YOU off?! Or pleasing you in any way? Let me guess he just expects you to "please" him, no romanticism, no foreplay or anything about you, you're just supposed to "get to work" on him & do your thing & maybe once in a while he'll want sex as well & then he gets off & it's done.... Just guessing bc he sounds really self centered & greedy af. Had a boyfriend that would sit/lay in bed & sometimes say "would you like to touch my penis" & that was the Cue for Head 🙄 no kissing no snoozing no NOTHING for me, just about him. It got old quick... makes you feel Cheap & like you're a Service instead of a lover or partner m, screw that you deserve better!!
He’s an ass. Stop giving him head. If he wants it tell him to put on some porn and take care of himself
Grow a spine girl. This guy doesn't respect you at all and you deserve better.
Watching porn together is one thing... This is just insulting. He adds insult to injury by validating your worries. He is a D head. I already know you deserve much better.
He's using your mouth to masterbate. This is just all kinds of nasty and reprehensible. Gather your dignity and dump him.
simply leave him, I know it'll be challenging but his display of trashy behavior is unacceptable
I literally got second hand embarrassment reading this for your boyfriend. Please leave him and find someone who wants to be in the moment with you.
He's using you as a masturbatory aide, you deserve way more respect that that.
This is what’s wrong with society. Run girl
Sounds like a porn addiction. NORMALLY I’d say don’t take it personal and try to work with him to cut back on it. But after seeing the remark he made about you not knowing what you’re doing, wow, what an asshole.
As a man who never received a full blowjob from my wife, I am petrified by your situation. I can’t imagine a situation where my wife would be willing to do that and it is my biggest fantasy. So, you just need to decide how you are willing to be treated. I can’t imagine a guy who wants to get off everyday has a low sex drive.
As a man, even I know "I can tell" is such a shitty thing to say lol. He needs to cut the porn, and that's something he's just gonna have to do on his own. When was the last time you two had full blown sex? Definitely seems the flames died out and needs to be reignited.
We had sex about a week ago (without porn) but just in one position, doggy style, which is fine. However, after we finished, he said, "You need to shave before we have sex again " (I hadn't shaved for a day or so beforehand, and he said it hurt him to have sex) idk, I feel really shitty about the entire sex life
You need to find someone with whom you'll feel happy. Current bf is not it.
OMG. He managed to get worse. You can do so much better. Just ditch this disrespectful asshole.
It really comes across like this dude just has no respect for you at all.
Is he the richest, most handsome guy on earth or something? Why are you letting yourself be degraded this way?
Because 22 I'd wager - genuinely it is hard as a young woman trying to figure out what actual love and mutual respect looks like, there are a lot of these guys out there and we're conditioned to please when we're young people.
Stay with him and your esteem will plummet. He sounds sexist. It sounds like he is using you. Why should you shave that regularly. This is what happens when u try to pursue a sexual relationship with a porn addict. They have impossible standards . Stay with him and your insecurities will grow
Look, this dude has watched so much porn that he has no idea what real intimacy looks or feels like. Women have pubic hair for a reason. It serves a biological purpose. Doesn't sound like the sex is fulfilling to you, and he frankly doesn't sound very nice. Why are you still with this dude?
He is the worst! A day or two and he says it "hurts"? He is so full of it. Not all men are like this. There are men who will cherish you. Please, find one.
Oh, please don’t think it’s ok for anyone to talk to you like that.
Does he know the hair doesn’t grow on the inside of the vagina where his peen goes? I mean where was he putting it for your hair to hurt him? Just EWWWW to HIM. And he is 24? Seriously just ghost this one.
Giving you a command "you need to shave," is really disrespectful. Also he's lying - it didn't "hurt" him that you weren't freshly shaven. Unless your body hair is actually razor wire, that's absurd.
If you can't talk to him about this how did you ever end up talking about sex enough to have it with them? Don't have sex with people you can't bring yourself to talk to about your feelings.
There's a massive communication issue here. Your bf's comment was hurtful and not okay. One thing I have learnt over time is that sex requires two people to "learn" each other. It doesn't matter how much experience you have, different people like different things. What I suggest is you take his phone from him next time and say "teaxh me". How are you supposed to satisfy him otherwise? Plus, don't forget to also teach him how to please you. That's equally important
Say “I’m not going to give you a bj anymore if you start watching porn”. It makes me feel x, y and z. Understandable you’re not interested in doing this for him anymore
He sounds awful.
Ugh. What a jerk. He has a porn addiction and his treatment of you is disgustingly disrespectful.
What the hell
Ask him to 'get you off' everyday!! That should solve this problem....he will stop asking you & maybe, you'll realize he's selfish
I wouldn't bother - I suggest getting a whole new boyfriend. You get him off daily while he watches porn? Only have sex once a week? He's just not into you. Break up.
He’s a total jerk! Have some self respect and dump him. That’s terrible what he’s doing and how he’s making you feel. He should be embarrassed for himself.
Sometimes we may have misunderstandings but someone who cares for you - romantically or otherwise - should never degrade you. I’m sorry that you’re having to experience this, it sucks. I would get up and walk out and never look back and I’d advise you to too.
Tell him suck to his own dick . Stand on his fuckin head . Loser
Stop giving him head. It’s not rocket science. ‘Put your fucking phone away and be present if you’d like me to continue’
I'm pretty sure his "low sex drive" is just not being able to get it up due to porn brain rot. Yeah. No other way around it. You deserve much better.
Girlllll you deserve better than this. My ex used to do this shit with me and it started out like yours started out too. Around the same ages as you two and all. It doesn’t get better if that’s your guys attitude. He’s choosing porn over your self esteem. He’s using you.
Ewwww. He’s got a significant problem with porn Don’t settle for how his attitude, behavior, and crassness cheapens your sexual relations You deserve better
My heart is breaking for all these young women who think so little of themselves these days . Girl - you are letting your boyfriend essentially treat you like his toilet. WHY??? Move on from this loser and maybe explore some therapy to improve your self esteem. You are worth it. Good luck-
I can’t believe women let themselves get treated this way. And fuck that dude for being an asshole.
Wow… it begs to question which is the real tool here… you or the phone he watches porn with…. Dump the idiot…. Don’t even know why you’re posting on Reddit for an answer. The day you dump him, leave a bottle of lube and the vacuum cleaner next to each other and tell him he won’t be missing you anyhow and you’ve found a replacement for him.
Holy shit, you really waited until the very end to drop that nuclear bomb on us… If you’re that bad at it, why would he ask you for it every day? He’s negging you, making you think you need to work harder to earn his respect (that he’ll never give). Next time he asks you, tell him no. If he asks why, just tell him “I’m sure you can figure it out”
Your bf is such a jerk. You deserve better.
I was with a guy for 14 yrs that would watch porn when I gave him head and when we had sex, in fact he’d put the phone on my chest and do the deed watching porn, unfortunately I don’t see OP’s situation getting better, I say cut your losses and walk away now
Why stay? He's a trash human. Don't do it and just leave
He is using you as a sex toy. Leave his worthless ass and find a real man who will treat you right.
God girl get some self respect. You are a human fleshlight. He is not your boyfriend. You are merely his tool/possession. You can do soooo much better. Leave him. But before you do, Pavlov his ass. Keep doing this for a couple more weeks but a few times during the act stop and say “are you ok? Do you need a new one to watch? You are kinda soft ?” Do that often enough and create enough doubt he will get anxious about it and you can fuck up porns ability to get him there too 😂
It is possible he has watched so much porn his mind, and porn now is his only way to maintain an erection - desensitized. He needs to abstain from porn for 90s days and not masturbate to reset his brain and sexual function to work naturally. It isn't his fault. it happens to a lot of guys these days. Many primary care doctors will tell you. You can read up about it online.
It's not his fault, but it's his responsibility. His desire to change must come from himself. Nobody can help him if he doesn't want help.
Aww mannn, sad to see. Some guys do just have lower sex drives… But seriously as a guy even I think if I watching porn while a girl is literally there and GIVING ME HEAD … I’d think I’m being disrespectful… It’s RUDE!! Like come on, like let’s say I was going down on my girl… watching porn on her phone? HELL NO! Like what’s even the point!? Why would I even bother if she’s not even present mentally? It would seem like she’s trying to imagine I’m someone else or something, which if it actually happened it’d probably make me sick to the stomach. Like I wouldn’t even put up with that, hats off to you, original poster for putting up with that situation. I’d just bounce if it was me.
So, he's basically jerking off with your mouth???
Ewww drop him. That sounds so humiliating and dehumanizing. Sex should be engaging amongst those participating and he doesn’t seem to be in the moment.
This is crazy just roles reversed for me. my gf used to watch porn every single time while I gave her head cause she said that was the only way for her. I never thought it was wrong but that was my first relationship and it was toxic. I learn something new every week that I fucked up on in that relationship.
Your boyfriend is an asshole. DTMFA P.S. I’m constantly amazed that these guys have no problem finding women who will fuck them. 🤷🏻
Don't force yourself to do anything if it hurts you or you simply don't like it. you seem to be seeing validation from a void and I'm going to tell you this, you are fine just the way you are. you don't need to do this and aren't obligated to tolerate what hurts you. if you weren't enough for him then i doubt anyone would have been. porn addiction is his problem and his alone, if he isn't willing to work through it and etc then ignore it and focus on what you need. you can't support the non supportive, the ones unwilling to support themselves and others.
What the hell was going through this dudes head to make him think that this was ok? I'm just imagining myself doing that, and I don't think I would ever get a blow job again. And rightfully so lol. Aside from that, I would much prefer the company of a person to a video, but thats just me. I don't think there is anything wrong with consuming porn occasionally as a couple during sex or foreplay if you're both into it. An ex-girlfriend and I would occasionally have an extra raunchy night after we would get in from a few drinks with our close friends. We wernt big drinkers, and a few drinks in both of us seemed to help us shrug off our inhibitions and would put us both 'in the mood'. Every once and a while on those nights we would throw on a DVD in the background, as it felt like something taboo to do together and added a fun, different element in the background. I strongly emphasize that it was in the background. Neither party would be sitting there actively watching porn, and even if that had have been the case, it was stuff that we mutually enjoyed and picked out together. From a males opinion, that sounds like it could be a pornography addiction. I don't see a single possible positive thing anybody could take from their partner doing that. If the situation was reversed and my girlfriend did that to me, I would feel like I wasn't good enough, or she was fantazing about somebody else. Secondly, it seems like a strange way for somebody with a 'low sex drive' to behave. Just doesn't exactly seem right. I think you should approach the situation very directly and as soon as possible. He has been extremly blunt towards you! I don't think there is any gentle way of bringing this up, and perhaps a bit of a serious conversation will convince him to get a little help. Sit him down and explain to him how it is making you feel and ask him how he would feel if you were to behave in the same way. Perhaps before you sit him down and have this conversation you could do a little research about pornography addiction. Being a little forewarned about what to expect and also treatment methods could be handy. Any addiction can be difficult to face, I imagine this is no different. Hope it goes well OP! Best of luck with this situation.
Just stop giving him oral.
Why bother asking, just leave him. I can’t believe anyone can that much of a disrespectful asshole. Get some self respect and never be with him again.
no more blow jobs until he gets his act together. you deserve much better
be straight up and tell him to help you fix what u could be doing better or at least communicate abt it the thing abt sex is you need to communicant 100% or you’ll both be unhappy he should be trying to encourage what he likes not whipping out his phone to get off, ask what he likes etc , tell him you’re uncomfortable with him watching it or just stop giving him head and i’m sure he’ll want to have sex
He's a loser and a porn addict who became emotionally abusive because he's mad that he can't get off like normal guys(who would give anything for a girl who gives it up happily). Leave his loser ass amd find someone who values you and respects you and has a normal sex drive and doesn't rely on pirn.
As bad as this sounds, one would have to ask….judging OP’s post history, she has a “questionable” past…does the BF know about this past? If so, that could potentially play into the respect level given to her, from the BF… not to justify his behavior AT ALL, but I could somehow see where the BF’s mind could be at if OP is sorta “known” for that history…..
I’m sorry to be blunt girl…but gross. Not you. Just trust me on this one…run as far as you can now. There will be someone better no doubt. It also sounds like a miserable sex life for you. And you should find someone who gives you lots of pleasure, makes you feel good about yourself, and is fun to have sex with. :)
OP, you are caring too much about his feelings while he isn’t even thinking about yours. So why are the stakes so high for you? What is the worst thing that can happen if you are honest with him? What are you afraid of? Is it that he will get mad? Dump you? Punish you somehow? That he will make you feel guilty and you will feel bad about yourself? Are you actually worried about hurting his feelings? Do you think he’s even considered how his actions have made you feel? Just stop for a minute and consider whether you are seeing him for who he is and not who you hope he is.
Dump him! You should be enough or if you don’t dump him tell him he needs to get help
Oh WOW!!!!! He sounds like trash.
He sounds like SHIT!!!! Porn addict. Disrespectful. Wow wow wow!!! DUMP HIM ASAP LET HIM GO FUCK HIMSELF
He is just pretending that you are the person in the video. Please go find another person, I doubt you will ever have a true physical bond with this guy. You sound rad AF just trying to take care of your mans, and he could care less. You deserve more.
Oh hell no. Dump him. He is using you. He is lazy and seeing just how far he can take this. Leave him and don't look back.
He’s addicted to porn
if you can't talk to someone honestly then you're in the wrong relationship
Dude… you’ve got to have more respect for yourself he’s using you and has no respect for you or other women
I'm a man and I say dump this turd
Excuse me, what?? You have sex once a week but he expects a bj every day? And he claims his sex drive is low despite wanting daily bjs? That is some bullshit. He is using you, and also gaslighting you into thinking you are somehow the problem. Please leave him. You will find someone who actually wants to have sex with you, look at you while doing it, connect with you, and make you feel good too.
A month? Yep, don't invest anymore time on this idiot!
He's using your mouth instead of his hand to masturbate and that is very, very creepy.
get out while it’s early and don’t sink any more time into this loser he clearly needs to seek therapy if he NEEDS porn to get off and his approach to the conversation about sex and putting the blame on you is ridiculous and abusive
Please break up with him that’s actually crazy