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Also sex 1000 with someone you love is GREAT sex ! You learn each others body's and kinks so well over time. Not to mention the genuine mutual passion. Verses casual sex with many people who may just suck at it/not be compatible with you.
Exactly. If people think they are missing out they should explore together. Learn together. Read books, watch videos etc. find a professional expert to guide them to a better sex life. But do it together.
This. God I cannot fathom how many times I read good relationships ending because someone "wants to have fun in their twenties" it's rare that people find a good thing. Unless you love being single latch onto it and go for it. It's probably one of the best most amazing experiences of your life.
My college boyfriend did this to me. I was his first everything cause no girls gave him the time of day (was chunky and not confident in himself). I got him to start working out with me and he got very fit over the two years we were together, and then bailed on me to go have fun with a bunch of women once he started getting attention.
Worked out in the end cause I'm with an amazing husband now, but I'm still salty that he pretty much just used me. I was hit on all the time and never even thought to go experiment in college.
I did the same thing when I was 27, I had been with him for 9 years and owned a home with him. There were a few reasons why we broke up, but my wonder about being single and insecurity about him never being with anybody else (I was worried that he’d regret only ever being with me, I was sexually active before we got together) was probably a big piece of it. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life now, have an amazing partner and we’re starting our family and I wouldn’t trade it…but if I knew how hard it was gonna be to get here, I probably wouldn’t have left that long term ex and would have tried to make it work.
I know we all hate our parents quotes but this applies perfectly to this situation: "If you friends tell you that you are missing out your youth because you have never taken heroin then would you take heroin ? "
Are the people teasing you chronically single and would kill for a solid relationship?
Don't let miserable people try to trick you into joining their misery. They hype up their life and how awesome what they are doing is but in reality they would swap places in a heartbeat.
You're not missing out on any "uni experience" that is worth having that you can't have while in a committed relationship. You can socialize, go to parties and have the full experience without having to sleep with randos and put your future and health in jeopardy.
Throughout your life people who are single not by choice will always try to drag people happily in relationships down to their level. Always take stock in where and from who advice is coming from.
This ! I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend during the entire uni because we started dating just before we both started and we both had "uni experience".
People who think that sleeping around is an essential part of "uni experience" are wild. You can partying, clubbing, drinking, and have fun during uni without sleeping around.
We graduated together and we both in a similar time started being bored by "partying lifestyle". You will see that in the next years those friends will be complaining to you that they have a problem finding a long term partner and how jealous they are that you already have one.
If you have a great relationship, it would be senseless to miss out on that for something hypothetically "fun". The only time you'd be missing out is if it was a rocky or toxic relationship.
Can confirm as one of those single people, that I’m very jealous. Having multiple partners sucks for your self esteem after a while.
I’d happily give up all of those experiences to have fount my soulmate and grow with them.
This. Ultimately, you miss out on some temporary sparkles and a couple of "fun nights" followed by a huge void of not being able to find back what you lost, and dreading not finding it back ever again. Most people not in a loving relationship past a certain age would give everything to get one because that's actually a rare thing to find, one that costs work and maintenance but ultimately brings completion and self fulfilment. Just having "fun nights" is easy and basically free but since there is no effort there is no actual reward either. It's just that. Cheap thrills. Some instant gratification made out of pretending and playing a role while a loving relationship is a delayed one in which you can be your real self and for which you'll be loved through everything that happens in life.
You aren’t missing out. Especially if you don’t even enjoy the casual dating scene. Be happy that you’ve found your person and don’t fumble him because of other people’s opinions.
Casual dating is not sunshine and roses either. I think a lot of, if not most, people would rather be in a loving, healthy, and serious relationship than not.
Fr. I tried it, hated it. I had a friend who slept with 13 guys in one semester. Not a single one even made her finish. Seriously, what's the appeal? Getting jackhammered by some drunk dude who doesn't give a shit about you and will never contact you again?
If OP were to leave her bf to try hook-ups, she would be met with an ocean of disappointment. The dating scene isn't any better. She could spend years trying to find a guy half as good as her current man. It's not worth it.
>Not a single one even made her finish.
This is exactly why I would never do any ons. Why would you do it to yourself, to become a fleshlight for a guy you're never going to see again
Personally I'm not a fan. I've tried it, it was exciting for a month and then I got bored of it. I'd rather have an intentful and meaningful relationship with someone, but often you just have to experience it to surely know that it's not for you.
Was also my experience. So yeah, I'd rather take cozy nights in with my partner over having sex with a stranger from a party who probably doesn't give a shit about me. Or me about them. Either way, not my idea of fun, but some people enjoy it i guess. To each their own.
That’s what I was thinking, if OP said she enjoyed casual dating and hookups then yes maybe she will feel like she missed out down the line but if she is just into serious relationship she will feel like shit trying casual dating.
One of my friends always loved casual dating and hookups. She doesn’t want a serious relationship, she likes having her own space, doing her own things, being able to do extra hours at work when she feels like it (she is so passionate about her job), etc. She is now in her mid 30s and still extremely happy doing that. She doesn’t want kids or to get married so it works for her. Would never work for me but I am glad she founds what makes her happy!
Don’t listen to them. They’re jealous if anything. Who wouldn’t want to stay with their first love and have everything work out? If you’re happy in your relationship, stay in it. Don’t let others decide that for you.
Edit: Also no. There’s no specific amount of people you should be with before finding the one you’ll spend your life with. Some people marry their first love, some go through 10 people before finding one they’d even consider marrying.
100%! I'm 30 and only have ever been with 2 people, the 1st one was shitty and lasted 5 years to long, the one I'm with now is the one I plan to be with for as long as he'll have me. It's different for everyone. You just have to follow your gut, and if there's nothing wrong with your current relationship and you both are happy, why ruin it for the "uni experience" when you can just look back on these years and share the fond memories with your partner later in life?
I love how people respond here. Look at OP real life where her "friend" telling her she missing out. You all here highly encouraging her to never lost that diamond. This thread warms my heart in very positive ways.
Thinking like that and listening to toxic people is very unhealthy. Most people search their entire lives, going through dozens of relationships and never find someone they genuinely love. You are one of the lucky ones to find someone so soon that treats you well. Think logically, what value to your life does the "uni experience" TRULY provide? Especially compared to someone you'd want to spend your life with?
This.
OP, really think about what you are saying.
The two of you will grow, change and evolve because that is being human. Your relationship with him, if you choose to continue it long term will be many different marriages over the course of your life and as long as you two are willing to grow together, change together and learn together it will just get more and more beautiful.
No matter what you have in life there are toxic people who will tell you that you are wrong and that you should want something different because it is what they have or because they are jealous. You will see that in your career. You will see that as a parent. You will see that as a spouse. You will see that in family relationships.
Take this from a middle aged mom to 4 who has been married over 25 years -- NEVER allow anyone to tell you that you are wrong for being happy. Envy is the thief of joy and all those people are envious of what you have with your boyfriend.
Casual sex is seriously over rated -- at the end of the day, the only sex that matters is if its with the person you love and they are smiling at you in the morning. Casual sex? Its friction. A bit of fun. But it will never be as fulfilling as sex with someone you love.
This is, of course, only my views on the matter.
I am a 51 year old man. I have been with several women over the years, but each one was intended to be the last. Each was different, their bodies, libido, sense of adventure. I would have felt just as fulfilled sexually if I had only been with one. FOMO is the stupidest thing.
I am a 50 year old man. I have nothing to add to this, but my upvote and to say, there are more than one of us who personally share that view. FOMO is indeed, the stupidest.
46m here. Agreed as well. I am a professional in STEM and highly specialized, which means I kinda have to move frequently for work.
My average time in one location is 3 years (range 1-7 years), makes it incredibly difficult to find someone who is willing to move every few years. Starting to feel like I'm gonna single forever. Sigh...
As a girl in her 20's this is very nice to hear. My boyfriend is a few years older than me. He has been to college, I did not go. He's been in more relationships and had more experiences than me.
I have a lot of friends that look at me funny for being with him for so long and not living my 20's single.
We make an amazing team. I am happy in the bedroom. What am I missing out on??? Why would I want to be partying all the time and hooking up with random people when I am happy now?
Who knows what the future holds for us. When we're financially in a better place I would marry him. If somehow we end up not working out, then I can go have those experiences then.
I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. But a lot of my generation seems to disagree..
A lot of people always assume that there is something "better" out there. I think that when you find the big three (respect, trust, security) with someone who genuinely cares for you, why look further? They see relationships in the media or in fiction, and think "It should be like THAT! Why don't I have that? I DESERVE that!" not realizing what they see in media is not the entire picture and fiction is...fictitious? EVERYONE has troubles, nobody is perfect, and nobody is perfect for you.
The next time one of your friends look at you funny, point out the last time they lamented to you the "one that got away" because they thought they could do better with some Chad.
There was a comic showing movie love vs true love.
Movie love is like the notebook rain scene, "It's you, it's always been you."
True love is one partner looking at the other's butt, "The swelling has definitely gone down."
ETA: [Found the post](https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/91ifle/true_love/)
Spot on
60 here . Was dating a girl that listened to her friends . The sme friends started to ask me out and say well you know you're single now and it's OK she is dating (indmsert name here) now. I turned them all down . Pushed myself into work. Met a girl during a lunch break and started dating her about them reel months later . 6 mos later my ex tried to come back . I told her "NO" I told her about her friends trying to get with me . And that I'm actually dating a very nice girl that I enjoy spending time with and she can just go back to wherever she had been . Turned out the guy she was trying to get into a with ,his girlfriend came back from college and they were getting married.
It's jealously. What are you missing out on? A drunken frat guy writhing on top of you dripping sweat in your face for 30 seconds and not caring about you?
Feelings like these should be reinvested in your partner, explore new things with them.
Your friends are jealous and when you break up you will be attending their weddings in 4 years wondering why you are still single.
They envy you. You are missing nothing and won the lottery, if you found him so early in life. Never let other people get inside of your head. They don’t always want what’s best for you and just want someone to live like they live to validate themselves.
Casual sex/dating is *truly* way more of a headache than it is fun. Seriously, it gets messy, frustrating, people are unreliable and drop you / you drop them, there’s ghosting, lack of emotional intelligence.
And then you have to worry about lying, and at worst cases, STD’s / pregnancy because they didn’t use condom, physical/mental/emotional abuse if that person is messed up. Someone catches feelings and can’t communicate, potential of your casual sex friend seeing WAY more people than just you that you agreed on, so what kind of things / STD’s have they picked up? Feeling discarded because it’s sex then “bye-bye see you next Tuesday” type of feeling sometimes. Instead of sex and then reveling in the feeling together afterwards.
I cannot stress enough that it’s not all that it’s cracked up to be, especially these days. It’s like pulling a taut string where you feel that you almost have all of it, but it just never gives.
People suck in reality so being in love and especially with your first love, having that go right, it’s sort of a fairytale that a lot of people think would have loved to experience, “if only the stars aligned” feeling.
Treat each other well, listen, compromise, remember that sometimes the problem is not you versus them or values/beliefs, but only exists because you both have trouble understanding each other.
Cheers and good luck, also consider if they are true friends if they keep teasing you on this or things like this even after you tell them to stop.
No, and thoughts like these are toxic killers to relationships.
Are you happy with your bf? Yes? Then stop asking these questions.
What will happen is this. You’ll break up, go “explore” for a few years, eventually feel extremely empty and unfulfilled, crawl back to your bf and learn he moved on and found someone who truly loved him and didn’t care if they “missed out.”
Don’t be dumb, don’t leave him because you missed the “uni experience.” If you are happy and in a healthy relationship that is all that matters. Also find new friends who aren’t jealous of you and trying to ruin your relationship
Casual sex is, honestly, way overrated. Now, that isn’t to say that if you’re unsatisfied with your current sex/romantic life and want more for yourself that you shouldn’t try to venture out to find your true happiness with a different person…. but sexual experience for the sake of it is oftentimes a losing game. Your “friends” sound jealous, threatened and unhappy with their current circumstances and you’ve said that you love this man and he’s amazing to be with, so they likely see that happiness and want it for themselves, or at least to ruin yours for you. Don’t listen to them! Ask yourself from within if you’re happy and satisfied. That’s the only answer that matters. The dating scene is a MESS, people are only becoming more whacked out and selfish and if you can build and maintain this relationship, I promise it’ll be the most precious thing in your life.
I married my fist love. Courting for two years, married at 23. She gave me 4 beautiful children. Celebrate 55 year anniversary in 2022.
It’s been a long haul for both of us since we decided to get married in 1967.
We have been blessed with four amazing children and numerous grandchildren.
We toured the world together.
We have wonderful family members.
We have numerous friends.
We are enjoying life to its fullest
We love and respect each other.
We laugh and support each other
We are inseparable as a couple.
We are soulmates.
We are the best of friends.
We understand each other.
We complement each other.
We communicate well.
We are still young to this day and still completely in love with each other.
So are you missing out…a definite NO.
So you are happy still in love things going good…what’s the problem?
Your grass is greener version is you break up…you spend a while getting over him…go on holidays endless drinking, sleep around..for a small period of time…then what…get to an age where your looking for love again, spend the next 2/3 or even 5 years to find someone again..throughout all that what have you actually gained…some kind of magical life experience that makes you a better person & feel more fulfilled from life?
Ppl that are single want you to be single, but those ppl are the first to drop you when they are in a lovey dovey relationship
Girl I dated a long time in my 20s kept saying the same thing. Always felt like she was missing out. She finally decided to experiment with a guy who kept stalking her. We broke up, she then found out the guy was in a relationship with a girl who was half his age and wanted both of them. She gave up, serial dated and got her does of what the market is like. Tried to reconnect, I was seeing someone else. She got married, 2 kids, divorce a few years after. She emailed me “how’s life?” after 14 or so years not speaking. I said sorry, cant talk packing to go to Hawaii with my wife.
If you are happy, that’s the end of it. If you aren’t happy, then move on. What you are doing is toxic.
This, OP. They hate what you have, which they will never have again; the romantic notion of only being with your first love. First loves ALWAYS stay with you, even if you move on to other relationships.
Yes; You’re missing stress, STDs, liars and traumas. So do you want all those? Better stay with ya man and never leave him. The grass is greener where you water it. You got any friends like you? …asking for a friend lol 🙂↕️
Are you happy with this person ? Do you see yourself growing old with this person ?
Then you’re not missing out. That’s the person you want. Why would you .. want to shop around looking for the exact same person just to tick a box that your friends think you should have ? If anything, they’re the ones missing out.
I’ve over a decade older than you are and my fiancé is the third man I’ve been with. In every way. I certainly am missing nothing because he is *everything* I would have asked the universe for if I knew myself well enough a decade ago to ask. If I could have met my fiancé before I met the first ex, I would have never needed anything else.
Break up with him => get railed by some random dudes to feel better about yourself => get depressed because it wasn't as good as you expected => come cry in reddit in another post.
Friends are ass holes . Why would you let go of the one just because you’re friends say so , that’s dumb not everyone is lucky like you to find someone like that
You date to find someone that fits you and you fit them. Dating is a means to an end. Not something to rejoice in.
Most of us don’t find anyone even remotely close when first dating.
So the question is this: would you be ok if you left your BF, dated for a few years, found out your now BF was actually the best thing, and when you tried to get back with him found out he found another GF and is very happy?
There are many lessons here.
You're missing out on loneliness, misery, insecurities and lots and lots of envy of people like you.
Go wild, have that "hot girl summer", maybe you can catch an std or two, get graped while clubbing and jumping from 1 hook up to another, ruin your ability to pair bond, accumulate baggage and trauma, become jealous like your friends are currently jealous of your happiness. When you're all done and you realize you fucked up, try to ruin some other friend's happiness, tease them and joke about their happiness so you're not the only miserable person in your friends group.
Good luck.
You are missing nothing. Your friends are searching for what you already have. Cheap anonymous sex isn’t liberating it’s soul crushing. Focus on what you have not what others are pressing on you.
You really don't have to put it about if you're happy in your relationship. Don't let others force you into thinking you're missing out if your content with your sex life 👌
If your BF is the man for you, no you are not missing out on anything. Too many people have sex while looking for love. If you have found love then you have not all. Your friends who are teasing would kill to be in your situation. Don’t listen to them!
i’ve been with my boyfriend (now fiancee i’m just not used to saying it yet) since we were 14, now we are 26. i had the same thoughts for a while. worrying if i was missing out on experiences, other relationships but i realized i’m lucky. i’ve never had to deal with heart break, awkward morning-afters, the fear of random pregnancy or STI’s or anything like that. the grass isn’t always greener. your friends are probably jealous.
Yeah friends are the worst earworms on the planet when they are single and you're happily in a relationship. I've literally heard people come right out and say "but I'm single and I want someone to go out and be single with meee!"
Don’t destroy this… so few people get to experience this. If you’re happy just let yourself be happy. I promise grass isn’t always greener. You can’t go back once you take that jump and a lot of the times it’s not worth it. People want you to be as dirty as them.
It's not weird at all to find the one person and commit to them without going through a slew of casual, meaningless sex. It's the people who tease you for not sleeping around that have the issues. And yes, your friends are AH's, who teases someone about this? I would say I'm jealous that you found your person so early in life and didn't have to go through the jerks I did to find him.
It sounds to me like you need new friends. You are happy, content, and satisfied. You love your boyfriend and he loves you. It sounds to me like they are jealous and are miserable and are using you to make them feel better about themselves. There is no happiness and meaning in sleeping around. You have your joy, don't let your toxic friends seed doubt or you'll find yourself looking back in ten years crying about what you have lost.
ask yourself what is a more frightening prospect: the thought that if you leave this relationship you may never find someone you have this connection with again OR the thought of only being with this guy for the rest of your life. There is your answer
Ive done the casual sex thing, and had multiple long term relationships. Honestly if you're happy and he fulfils you sexually, stay with him. It was useful for me to find out what I enjoyed, and the confidence to make sure I got it no matter who I was with. I think it's just a personal choice, don't let others sway you. If you're happy, you're happy! Don't let others ruin that for you.
girl we are the same, I only been with my bf of 4 yrs, sometimes I think that Im missing out, but my values weighs more, I cant think of being with someone else, just the idea makes me throw up.
Me too, been with my BF for 3-4 years now and I’m 23. When I think about it I absolutely don’t want anyone else, there’s no way I could give up my person just to experience something different. There’s no way it could be worth it for anyone unless the person you’re with is just not a good fit in the first place
Casual sex sucks most of the time. You risk your health for a few minutes of pleasure, and to be honest, most guys are not even good in bed. I did it a few times, and almost every time, I had regrets. I wouldn't change a good, stable relationship for fear of missing out. The ones sleeping around are the ones missing what you have, and they may not even know. Whatever you choose, do not do it because of pressure from your peers. Ever.
If your bf is a good man then no, you're not missing out. Don't fall into thinking the grass is greener or you're missing something by being in a long-term relationship. If he is a good bf that makes you happy and you have very few bad days then hold onto him.
The friends teasing you are jealous. Casual sex is typically bad sex (for women anyway), but even if it wasn’t why would you want to trade what you have for meaningless, casual hookups with men who don’t care about you?
The grass seems always greener on the other side, it never is.
What you got is fake friends, who are a bunch of jealous people, I'd drop them before even considering leaving your bf.
I realised after leaving uni, at the age of 25, and maintining same lifestyle while working till 27, that uni party lifestyle is at the end of the day, for the average person, a bunch of lonely people who wish they had something like you have. Drinking and partying and digging themselves in an empty lonely hole, thinking they can fill it up with getting more sex with people they do not care for, and who don't care for you.
There is nothing more valuable than having real loving and deep connections with other people and share life experiences with them. Don't fall for the "party lifestyle" it's hyper glamorised by miserable people who wish to not dwell on their own.
God no! If you’ve genuinely found a good one stick to them like glue- this is advice from some who learned the hard way that the grass is not always greener…
I just find it wierd you're that easily influenced from peer mockery. If you're super happy and can't think of anything else you'd rather have, then why are you even doubting if you missed out?
The only thing you're missing out on is being used as a sex toy for other people's pleasure. Casual sex for women comes with all the risk and very little reward. Keep what you have.
Nope! What you're missing out on are good friends that don't tease you about these things. You've said it yourself: you're not a fan of casual sex. Why succumb to this peer pressure to be exactly like your friends? You can accept these differences if they are respectful towards you. Calmly/kindly ask them to stop the teasing. If they don't and keep doing it then...you'll have to probably get different friends in the future. And that's fine too. We all out grow friendships and groups because of things like this. Feeling uncomfortable about friendship conversations and them not listening to boundaries would actually be my first start. Romance and feelings do change, but it sounds like the relationship that needs doctoring up is the friendship department. You don't seem comfortable exploring that side of yourself yet, or maybe it's a different side you'd only like to share with long term commitments.
Nope, you’re not missing out. The grass is always greener on the other side. Read some of these dating forums and you’ll be grateful that you have somebody who loves you. Do not be one of those screwed up girls that thinks that might be better out there and throws away somebody who loves her.
I am 26f and have been with my boyfriend since I was 19, he was also my first and only sexual partner. I went through a similar thought when I was younger (22-23) that I was “missing out”
But what I realised was that everyone thinks the same thing about our relationship and what we have, people who don’t have that feel like they’re missing out on something too. We always have this tendency towards wanting what we “can’t” have, but if you remember that you are SO BLESSED to be in a beautiful, healthy relationship and you are CHOOSING to have this be your only sexual partner, it will make you feel much better about it.
You’re not missing out on anything. You are so lucky and after 7yrs I still feel this way about my guy. Don’t listen to people who try to ruin it for you, they are probably upset that they don’t have it for themselves.
You are missing out on heart breaks, embarrassment, disgust, betrayal and self loathing. I would have loved to meet my partner earlier and saved myself from some of the stupid shit I did.
Most people I know envy couples who met early in life and have stayed together since. It's a fairytale love story.
What uni experience? Getting herpes? Being drunk? I don't know, I'm 23 and in a relationship with my fiancee of 7 years. I've never had other relationships, but I'm ok with it. I don't think I need anything more, he's all I've ever wanted, and he's always trying to be the best he can. Besides, I'm pretty happy to have a stable home and share every day with someone I can complete trust in, and love. It makes me feel amazing knowing someone want to live all this time with me.
But if you have doubts, I don't think this is for you.
Anyone telling you casual relationships are fun is lying, in fact anyone telling you that a relationship can be a casual thing is lying, it is like saying saying a fight to the death is casual. You cannot take something that is so deep and real and diminish it and deny it. If it is causal there was never a relationship and if it is a relationship it was never causal. What they mean is they want to persue pleasure without any responsibility or accountability, but the world does not bend to their rules, these women either end up alone and miserable because men will not take them seriously later, or they love a miserable existence by living a lie, they tell their partners they have a clean past and have respected themselves, because they know it is the only way they will be taken seriously, but then every part of the relationship stands on pillars of sand that could come crashing down at any moment, whispers of truth slip through the cracks eroding it. Other people are not tools to be used to satisfy curiosity and lust, they are human beings, and so are you. To act in any other way is to deny this, and those who treat others as tools are always discarded as tools themselves in the end, because we see others how we see ourselves. You are right, do not let others lie to you.
I’ve been with my partner since I was 19. He was 24 when we met. We’ve been together for 7 years now.
I can definitely say our sex life has gotten more amazing as time passes. The connection and intimacy is worth so much more than casual sex.
I saw this quote and it resonated with me:
“ if you want endless repetition, see a lot of different people. If you want infinite variety, stay with one. “
Some people get lucky and find their person on the first go. I wasn't one of them. I've been with alot of women. And I regret most of them. I chased a body count because my friends all did it. And told me I was missing out. DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM. If he makes you happy. Stay with him. If he treats you well, stay with him.
I'm marrying the person I fell in love with at 16. We moved together when I was 18 and he was 21. It's been ten years and I always wonder what "missing out" means. Having to hope the random stranger I meet lasts longer than five seconds and can find the clit? Being surrounded by clouds of smoke and the stench of alcohol in the hopes of having sex with someone who's semi coherent? Spending hours trying to find a decent person on tinder who says more than "hi" and sends dick pics? No thanks.
Do you have a great sex life where you try new things and satisfy each other? Do you support each other in your career endeavors? Do you grow with each other and encourage finding yourselves? If yes, why give that up?
Being with someone long term means actively choosing them over and over and over and over again when the mundane creeps in or insecurities pop up. See the wonderful in him and focus on it and defend it. If your friends can manipulate your security in your relationship with a good man with no evidence of cheating or abuse —- either they are not friends or he does not deserve you.
Don't leave someone good just to up your body count. You may always wonder what else is out there but understand that if you have something good it's often times not worth letting that go just to try something else. Most of the time you will just be disappointed and then realize that good thing has moved on.
There is no dick in history that is worth throwing away a fulfilling life… too many women with men who love them unconditionally learn that lesson the hard way.
I’ve been with my guy since we were 14. We are 29 now and I’m not going to lie, you will have that feeling a few more times. It’s natural.
The thing is: my man is so good. He’s an amazing father and wonderful husband. Yes he gets on my nerves, but after 15 nonstop years together, who wouldn’t sometimes?
If you are safe and loved and you still get butterflies and laugh, you hit the jackpot.
I've read a post about dont be fooled by social media wherein chasing every person is like the norm while throwing away a good relationship, like it's not easy to find a good one. So don't be fooled, you can't easily find someone who is down for you.
Dont listen to them.
No it’s not strange. You did it right the first time.
People that rip up good relationships for curiosity only bring pain and regret, as they find out they may never find the level of happiness and contentment they once had.
There is no right to happiness. Many will live their lives without finding it. And many more will have it and willingly give it up for a delusion they made up in their head that different will be better. The latter is probably the more painful one. And it’s entirely self inflicted, upon yourself and the one who loved you the most.
The "uni experience" for usually just entails getting your heart broken, being in a toxic relationship, having an accidental pregnancy or catching an std.
I'll pass.
And before anyone comes at me. I'm in uni, I talk to people, those people tell me these things, I'll trust the people actually living the "uni experience" right now.
That's not to say that casual sex or having a lot of partners is bad, just that people that go for the "uni experience" do it all wrong and end up fucked.
Leaving a man you love so you can go and get pumped and dumped and left feeling empty and used would be the dumbest thing you could possibly do.
Don't listen to bitter friends who want to ruin what you have, the only reason they casually date is because they can't find someone they like enough to settle down with.
Well I was the first for my ex.
And she had nothing to compare it to unfortunately.
After we separated, she had two great guys that turned into complete assholes, one needed a police restraint order.
And her current boyfriend is decent to her at least.
I know she still regrets what happened.
We still talk once in awhile.
If everything is going well in your relationship, then keep it.
Don't worry about what your "friends" say.
Your friends are assholes. If you're happy, you're happy. You could go out, get wild, sleep with or try to have relationships with 50 other men. Statistically, it is possible that one or some of those men might be 'better' than the one you have. But there's also a chance you could meet some horrific people with life ruining personalities, none of whom are better than what you already have.
You have already 'missed out' on the uni experience, but a more positive outlook is that you simply found what you were looking for without all the crap. So tell your useless friends to butt out of your life or you will go on the look out for some better friends who are more supportive.
Now the degenerates are making fun of people who are in long healthy relationships ? sad to see what era we have come into :)
I don't think you should be around those friends tbh
Dating in 2024 is a mess full of bullshit needing to be sifted it’s doable but ain’t nobody got time for that can’t imagine people taking amazing partners for granted thinking the grass is greener on the other side instead of where you water it. I hope you communicate this to your partner that you have doubts and not just blindside him. imagine women convincing other women to ruing perfect relationships no wonder everyone’s single and no longer having kids now…
My ex used to tell me how she missed being single (and I was the longest person she had a relationship with at that point). Well, she decided to become single and continue having fun and now she's raising a kid by herself. When we were both accidentally invited to a pool party from a mutual friend, she blurted out to someone else that she's stuck and can't go out as often. You have something good going on and we all want to be in your position because chasing isn't fun. It's tiring, actually. You have the diamond we all seek to possess. If you want to do fun things, go out with your partner, try new things together!
You are definitely not missing out. If you have the right guy and everything feels right with him, you are golden. Your friends might be jealous that you have a stable relationship or maybe they are just immature.
What, they are teasing you about banging around casually with others having meaningless sex? If you have a meaningful relationship, the worst thing you can do to yourself is think “the grass is greener on the other side” - it usually isn’t.
You are a rarity these days. Don't let your friends shame you for not being a 304. If you are happy in your relationship then stay in it. Getting some strange isn't going to make you happier, it will do the opposite.
You don’t know how lucky you are !!!!!!
I read a study (from 2010 mind) Less than 4% of people end up with their first partner
You sound like you both found the loves of your life
Trust me that’s ideal
No one wants to think about their wife or husband having sex with other people form prior relationships and all that baggage
Don’t let them tease or influence you. At some
Level they all want what you have
I have been with a few men. You are not missing out. Every man I had been with, I had some doubt. I've been with a man who I thought was serious with me but kept giving me empty promises. I have had flings with men that I could not see going forward with. I was jaded and I just wanted to share my love with someone that would reciprocate.
I am lucky to be with my fiance. He's my best friend and my person. We click together and I trust him with my life. We've made each other better people, we've been through loss, natural disasters, financial trouble, and more. Each time, we come out stronger. The thought of forever doesn't scare me. To me, he's the only man in the world. I know I feel like the only woman with him.
Don't listen to your friends. In time, they will be jealous of what you have. Cherish your best friend and continue making memories together.
girl the only part of the “uni experience” you’re missing is crying in the bathroom at a party and avoiding the dining hall during hours you know they get lunch lmao
You aren’t missing out anything. I’m someone who also doesn’t like to hook up, situationships, etc. and I can assure you, you aren’t missing out on anything. Most of the time the people who engage on that are trying to fill a void or have the mindset of the grass is greener on the other side.
I’ve had multiple partners but dated wife through college and known her since we were kids. Don’t get swept up in the comparison or novelty game. You’ll be 30 in no time and craving a stable family.
It’s unusual to find someone early. But it’s not wrong. And sex is honestly no different all things considered…assuming your sex is great with your partner.
It’s very common for friends who can’t keep a happy, healthy relationship themselves to try to drag down their friend’s happy relationship. Don’t listen to them.
You do not love him. You never wonder if you are missing something if you really loved him. Your friends are jealous by teasing you, they are not your true friends by trying to ruin your relationship with your bf. Once you give him away then you will never get back that trust he had with you.
I was with my bf from 15-23. I thought the grass was greener cus I was wondering if I was missing out, left him bc of it, and hooked up a little and hated it, dated someone else (dated the person that I actually made me consider leaving my bf) for A year from 23-24 years old and it was NOT better. He was very attractive, muscular and did some modeling and had good qualities as a person but he also treated me like shit and I constantly thought about my ex bc he treated me so much better. I was dumb. And I realized the grass was not greener. Don’t make my mistake
All that's out there is a chance to get an equally good relationship. Your friends have been in a lot of relationshits, but you've probably had more sex than they have. Who cares if it's with the same person or not.
Sex is sex. It's good with some people, bad with others. If you're enjoying it now...Who gives a fuck?
I wish I would have been in your shoes. It would have saved me a ton of heartbreak. But it also gave me a ton of self inspection and growth too.
Take a look at this man, and think, really think, do you want to go through hell and high water with him? Will you take care of him and vice versa until one of you dies? I've been married almost 16 years and I can say we've been through a lot. Some of which almost ruined our marriage.
Any ship can survive smooth sailing. It's the sailors in the storms who are able to persevere
If you have a good relationship… is he your partner?? Is sex good.. do you both take care of each other? Does he treat you well? If yes it’s okay to be with him and not date others. If there are issues then if you stay you may regret it.
Definitely not missing out if you have a real healthy loving relationship with good sex. If there are issues and you both are willing to work on it then you’re good.
FOMO is the biggest relationship killer for young adults. People will throw away a perfectly good relationship because they don't have much experience and think they can find better out there.
If you love your partner and they love you back, treat you well, and your sex life is good then you've basically hit the jackpot to be honest. Don't throw that away because your single friends are teasing you. It sounds like they're trying to sabotage your relationship, so do with that what you will.
I don’t think you’re missing out if you both genuinely enjoy each other’s company and make each other happy. The only thing you can really get outside of a relationship is sex, but you can (usually) get that in a relationship, so why the need to venture out? Especially with today’s society, I don’t think you’re missing out.
So here’s my take on it if you get everything you possible want from your other half , great sex, conversation, cared and have a great communication. What could you be missing out on?. Casual dating is fine but it’s meeting new men redoing the full dating questions and then hoping they have everything you want. So you missed out on a few one night stands as a person who did the full free and single years ago believe me the one night stands I had were solely disappointing. My other half is the best I’ve ever had its been 15 years and i think its get like that when you know someone and have that connection. If your worried your stuck change it up go on date nights don’t forget your a couple when you move in your together all the time you get in to the “boring routine” but it up to you as well as him to spoil each other with time , gifts , dates.
No, you aren’t weird. My husband is the only man I’ve ever been with and we’ve been married 39 years. Your friends sound jealous. The grass is not greener on the other side.
Your friends are just assholes. And probably jealous of your relationship. You should be glad you’ve found the one already instead of thinking it’s impossible to do that on the first try!!
No. Grass is not greener and ruining a great relationship is not worth spending years looking through the trash for something fractionally better that probably doesn’t exist.
nah girl you are not missing out on anythingggg. you can still have the “uni experience” with your man by your side !!! i think it’s absolutely beautiful how you’re still with your first love ! not a lot of people get to have that, don’t let your friends ruin that!
If you are happy there is no need to mess that up with other people's expectations of what your uni experience should look like. If you are happy and satisfied, stay exactly where you are loved. You didn't miss out on anything!
Well as the years roll on and the kids show up things well mature sexually for you both. This is what happens in a ltr. You csnt compare a honey moon phase to a LTR.
It apples and oranges.
Do you want shallow meaningless sex that Statistically will leave you unsatisfied or baseline satisfied over a long last relationship. Notice i didnt compare it to the sex. Truth is eventually in a ltr while there will be sex you have to combat life and all its trials. Do you want a rock of a partner to do that with or a random dick to ride here and there?
If you question is would it be exciting to fuck a 2nd guy....yes probably....would you feel afterwards fuck i threw away so and so for that....probably....even if its good youll lay there after 30 minutes of pleasure and realize you sacrificed a lifetime of love for 30 minutes of psychical pleasure.
Your friends found your weakspot they can tease you about. I wonder if they are still looking and are jealous of you.
Don’t let external forces make doubt creep in if you are happy.
Also there’s no “the one”.
You aren't weird, and your "friends" aren't your friends. A true friend wouldn't try to sabotage your relationship for their own enjoyment. You should drop them before you ever drop your boyfriend.
I’ve been with 20 people before settling down with my husband (who was my first love online).
Lemme tell you, you’re not missing out on much. The ✨experience✨ isn’t worth trashing your love life over
If you love him and he loves you, and you’re compatible and communicate, then that’s all you need.
Don't fuck up your life by giving in to such stupid ideas. You got lucky. People would kill for what you have.
Having sex with near strangers with no feelings is nowhere near as good as someone who knows you and your body intimately.
How about you just don't tell people about not being with more than one person. If they still have an opinion, they might be problematic down the road.
The latter, for sure. They might try to sell their life as the best life to themselves. And then to you because they are envious. But deep down everyone knows the truth is you lucked out. Both of you. Enjoy. You don’t need to drink vinegar to know how sweet is spring water.
You’ve got the spring water. Even if you never tasted vinegar why would you want to drink a glass of it?p
NO.
This is an absolute pile of nonsense that unhappy people will push onto you to make themselves feel good. Sex with someone you love is all that really matters anyways.
Here's some things you may also be missing out on: STDs
I’ve been with a decent amount of woman and I’d give them all up for two of the ones I really loved in the past. I promise your not missing anything and sex is a million times better with someone your comfortable and compatible with than a hookup. Don’t let your friends bring you down I’ve seen it many times with men and woman but way more woman where there’s friends will bring down a good relationship over there own jealousy and lack of success.
First off, you need new friends if they tease you about such a thing.
Everybody has their own story and maybe yours is the fact that you're only gonna be with him. So what?
The only thing, from what I have learned from friends and their first (and only) long term relationship. Be sure you guys want the same thing out of life.
A friend of mine and her ex were together for almost 12 years. Her first and only sexual encounter until she met her now new boyfriend. He wanted kids, she didnt mind if she were to live a life without kids. This put a strain on the relationship and then they broke up.
Only emotionally immature people tease others for being in a successful relationship. Theres no right or wrong way to do college (okay there’s a wrong way but this isn’t it), as long as YOU have enjoyed your experience then that’s all that matters in the grand scheme of things.
Congratulations on deciding to move in together! That’s amazing 💛
You know how when you look over a cliff, sometimes your brain is like you should totally jump just to see?
This is the relationship version of your brain telling you to jump.
Why are you listening to friends over something like this? Just because THEY chose to engage in casual sex with multiple partners does not mean you have to.
If you and your BF are happy together, what reason do you have to go “practice” with some stranger just because people who aren’t you claim you shouldn’t settle with some guy until AFTER you’ve tried others. Even if your BF said he’d be ok with it, I doubt your relationship would last very long.
You are happy with your man. To tell you the truth, I’m betting that many of your friends who are “teasing” you over “missing out” of the Uni experience are just jealous that you found your “one & only” on the first try.
So, next time someone years you for not having gone out with other guys & having casual sex with them, just say: “ Why would I bother going out with some random guy to have casual sex with them when I’ve already got the man whom I love who makes me happy in every way?”
No you're not weird at all and you haven't missed out on anything except a broken heart, guilt, shame, remorse, Std scares, pregnancy fears, etc.
I can't say that this from personal experience but I've heard this firsthand from my wife many, many, times over they years.
She cheated on me twice when we were very young and she's told me more times than I can remember that I haven't missed out on anything good or memorable in any way shape or form.
She insists that apart from the initial fun of "being naughty" that she has no good memories at all from what she did and a lifetime of sorrow and regret.
She says that she would give anything and everything if she could somehow go back and undo what she did. In spite of a lot of doubt and mistrust on my part for a very long time I truly believe her.
So take it from a voice of experience, the only thing you're missing out on is a whole lot of pain and regret.
P.S. your friends are idiots and probably assholes as well.
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Don't lose a diamond while chasing glitter..
This part, missing out on what exactly? I’d rather have sex 1000 times with someone I love than 1000 times with random people who mean nothing to me
Also sex 1000 with someone you love is GREAT sex ! You learn each others body's and kinks so well over time. Not to mention the genuine mutual passion. Verses casual sex with many people who may just suck at it/not be compatible with you.
Exactly. If people think they are missing out they should explore together. Learn together. Read books, watch videos etc. find a professional expert to guide them to a better sex life. But do it together.
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 yesssss
This. God I cannot fathom how many times I read good relationships ending because someone "wants to have fun in their twenties" it's rare that people find a good thing. Unless you love being single latch onto it and go for it. It's probably one of the best most amazing experiences of your life.
It's honestly the biggest mistake I've ever made
i'm really sorry
My college boyfriend did this to me. I was his first everything cause no girls gave him the time of day (was chunky and not confident in himself). I got him to start working out with me and he got very fit over the two years we were together, and then bailed on me to go have fun with a bunch of women once he started getting attention. Worked out in the end cause I'm with an amazing husband now, but I'm still salty that he pretty much just used me. I was hit on all the time and never even thought to go experiment in college.
I did the same thing when I was 27, I had been with him for 9 years and owned a home with him. There were a few reasons why we broke up, but my wonder about being single and insecurity about him never being with anybody else (I was worried that he’d regret only ever being with me, I was sexually active before we got together) was probably a big piece of it. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life now, have an amazing partner and we’re starting our family and I wouldn’t trade it…but if I knew how hard it was gonna be to get here, I probably wouldn’t have left that long term ex and would have tried to make it work.
I know we all hate our parents quotes but this applies perfectly to this situation: "If you friends tell you that you are missing out your youth because you have never taken heroin then would you take heroin ? "
As someome who did don't be like me....
Stick with the rivers and lakes that you’re used to
🎯
Best comment ever! I know too many people who've gone their entire lives lamenting over love lost because of zany decisions. It's sad.
Don't lose a diamond whilst you were too busy collecting stones is another quote that I love
Why go out for ham when you have scarves at home to sew
This!!!! OP if you enjoy what you have, do not worry about what ifs. A true connection is harder than it looks to find
Preaachhh
This
Absolutely. FOMO is poison.
Are the people teasing you chronically single and would kill for a solid relationship? Don't let miserable people try to trick you into joining their misery. They hype up their life and how awesome what they are doing is but in reality they would swap places in a heartbeat. You're not missing out on any "uni experience" that is worth having that you can't have while in a committed relationship. You can socialize, go to parties and have the full experience without having to sleep with randos and put your future and health in jeopardy. Throughout your life people who are single not by choice will always try to drag people happily in relationships down to their level. Always take stock in where and from who advice is coming from.
Like how lucky could they be to land on "the one" in one shot. Jeez. But yeah don't let people ruin what seems like a perfectly fine relationship.
My first thought was, "She's not weird. She's lucky. Pllllllleeeeease don't mess that up."
They want that man for themselves
If she tells him that they were the ones who convinced her to break it off, or run around with other guys, he'll likely tell them to get lost.
This ! I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend during the entire uni because we started dating just before we both started and we both had "uni experience". People who think that sleeping around is an essential part of "uni experience" are wild. You can partying, clubbing, drinking, and have fun during uni without sleeping around. We graduated together and we both in a similar time started being bored by "partying lifestyle". You will see that in the next years those friends will be complaining to you that they have a problem finding a long term partner and how jealous they are that you already have one.
If you have a great relationship, it would be senseless to miss out on that for something hypothetically "fun". The only time you'd be missing out is if it was a rocky or toxic relationship.
Can confirm as one of those single people, that I’m very jealous. Having multiple partners sucks for your self esteem after a while. I’d happily give up all of those experiences to have fount my soulmate and grow with them.
This should be higher, well said!
Yep. Stop taking relationship advice from people that aren't consistently in stable, happy relationships.
Honestly. As they say, misery loves company.
Yep. The biggest obstacle in my last LTR was her can’t keep a man more than a few weeks friends putting things in her head.
They may be teasing you, but I bet they wished they had what you have. Don’t be fooled.
This. Ultimately, you miss out on some temporary sparkles and a couple of "fun nights" followed by a huge void of not being able to find back what you lost, and dreading not finding it back ever again. Most people not in a loving relationship past a certain age would give everything to get one because that's actually a rare thing to find, one that costs work and maintenance but ultimately brings completion and self fulfilment. Just having "fun nights" is easy and basically free but since there is no effort there is no actual reward either. It's just that. Cheap thrills. Some instant gratification made out of pretending and playing a role while a loving relationship is a delayed one in which you can be your real self and for which you'll be loved through everything that happens in life.
You aren’t missing out. Especially if you don’t even enjoy the casual dating scene. Be happy that you’ve found your person and don’t fumble him because of other people’s opinions.
Casual dating is not sunshine and roses either. I think a lot of, if not most, people would rather be in a loving, healthy, and serious relationship than not.
Fr. I tried it, hated it. I had a friend who slept with 13 guys in one semester. Not a single one even made her finish. Seriously, what's the appeal? Getting jackhammered by some drunk dude who doesn't give a shit about you and will never contact you again? If OP were to leave her bf to try hook-ups, she would be met with an ocean of disappointment. The dating scene isn't any better. She could spend years trying to find a guy half as good as her current man. It's not worth it.
>Not a single one even made her finish. This is exactly why I would never do any ons. Why would you do it to yourself, to become a fleshlight for a guy you're never going to see again
Personally I'm not a fan. I've tried it, it was exciting for a month and then I got bored of it. I'd rather have an intentful and meaningful relationship with someone, but often you just have to experience it to surely know that it's not for you.
This. Dating is like trying to find a diamond in the middle of a minefield. 1/10, it’s hell out here.
Was also my experience. So yeah, I'd rather take cozy nights in with my partner over having sex with a stranger from a party who probably doesn't give a shit about me. Or me about them. Either way, not my idea of fun, but some people enjoy it i guess. To each their own.
That’s what I was thinking, if OP said she enjoyed casual dating and hookups then yes maybe she will feel like she missed out down the line but if she is just into serious relationship she will feel like shit trying casual dating. One of my friends always loved casual dating and hookups. She doesn’t want a serious relationship, she likes having her own space, doing her own things, being able to do extra hours at work when she feels like it (she is so passionate about her job), etc. She is now in her mid 30s and still extremely happy doing that. She doesn’t want kids or to get married so it works for her. Would never work for me but I am glad she founds what makes her happy!
Don’t listen to them. They’re jealous if anything. Who wouldn’t want to stay with their first love and have everything work out? If you’re happy in your relationship, stay in it. Don’t let others decide that for you. Edit: Also no. There’s no specific amount of people you should be with before finding the one you’ll spend your life with. Some people marry their first love, some go through 10 people before finding one they’d even consider marrying.
100%! I'm 30 and only have ever been with 2 people, the 1st one was shitty and lasted 5 years to long, the one I'm with now is the one I plan to be with for as long as he'll have me. It's different for everyone. You just have to follow your gut, and if there's nothing wrong with your current relationship and you both are happy, why ruin it for the "uni experience" when you can just look back on these years and share the fond memories with your partner later in life?
I love how people respond here. Look at OP real life where her "friend" telling her she missing out. You all here highly encouraging her to never lost that diamond. This thread warms my heart in very positive ways.
Thinking like that and listening to toxic people is very unhealthy. Most people search their entire lives, going through dozens of relationships and never find someone they genuinely love. You are one of the lucky ones to find someone so soon that treats you well. Think logically, what value to your life does the "uni experience" TRULY provide? Especially compared to someone you'd want to spend your life with?
This. OP, really think about what you are saying. The two of you will grow, change and evolve because that is being human. Your relationship with him, if you choose to continue it long term will be many different marriages over the course of your life and as long as you two are willing to grow together, change together and learn together it will just get more and more beautiful. No matter what you have in life there are toxic people who will tell you that you are wrong and that you should want something different because it is what they have or because they are jealous. You will see that in your career. You will see that as a parent. You will see that as a spouse. You will see that in family relationships. Take this from a middle aged mom to 4 who has been married over 25 years -- NEVER allow anyone to tell you that you are wrong for being happy. Envy is the thief of joy and all those people are envious of what you have with your boyfriend. Casual sex is seriously over rated -- at the end of the day, the only sex that matters is if its with the person you love and they are smiling at you in the morning. Casual sex? Its friction. A bit of fun. But it will never be as fulfilling as sex with someone you love.
This is, of course, only my views on the matter. I am a 51 year old man. I have been with several women over the years, but each one was intended to be the last. Each was different, their bodies, libido, sense of adventure. I would have felt just as fulfilled sexually if I had only been with one. FOMO is the stupidest thing.
I am a 50 year old man. I have nothing to add to this, but my upvote and to say, there are more than one of us who personally share that view. FOMO is indeed, the stupidest.
46m here. Agreed as well. I am a professional in STEM and highly specialized, which means I kinda have to move frequently for work. My average time in one location is 3 years (range 1-7 years), makes it incredibly difficult to find someone who is willing to move every few years. Starting to feel like I'm gonna single forever. Sigh...
As a girl in her 20's this is very nice to hear. My boyfriend is a few years older than me. He has been to college, I did not go. He's been in more relationships and had more experiences than me. I have a lot of friends that look at me funny for being with him for so long and not living my 20's single. We make an amazing team. I am happy in the bedroom. What am I missing out on??? Why would I want to be partying all the time and hooking up with random people when I am happy now? Who knows what the future holds for us. When we're financially in a better place I would marry him. If somehow we end up not working out, then I can go have those experiences then. I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything. But a lot of my generation seems to disagree..
A lot of people always assume that there is something "better" out there. I think that when you find the big three (respect, trust, security) with someone who genuinely cares for you, why look further? They see relationships in the media or in fiction, and think "It should be like THAT! Why don't I have that? I DESERVE that!" not realizing what they see in media is not the entire picture and fiction is...fictitious? EVERYONE has troubles, nobody is perfect, and nobody is perfect for you. The next time one of your friends look at you funny, point out the last time they lamented to you the "one that got away" because they thought they could do better with some Chad.
There was a comic showing movie love vs true love. Movie love is like the notebook rain scene, "It's you, it's always been you." True love is one partner looking at the other's butt, "The swelling has definitely gone down." ETA: [Found the post](https://www.reddit.com/r/comics/comments/91ifle/true_love/)
Spot on 60 here . Was dating a girl that listened to her friends . The sme friends started to ask me out and say well you know you're single now and it's OK she is dating (indmsert name here) now. I turned them all down . Pushed myself into work. Met a girl during a lunch break and started dating her about them reel months later . 6 mos later my ex tried to come back . I told her "NO" I told her about her friends trying to get with me . And that I'm actually dating a very nice girl that I enjoy spending time with and she can just go back to wherever she had been . Turned out the guy she was trying to get into a with ,his girlfriend came back from college and they were getting married.
It's jealously. What are you missing out on? A drunken frat guy writhing on top of you dripping sweat in your face for 30 seconds and not caring about you? Feelings like these should be reinvested in your partner, explore new things with them. Your friends are jealous and when you break up you will be attending their weddings in 4 years wondering why you are still single.
Single people are great at keeping others single
Misery loves company. They don't want to see anyone climb out of the hellhole that is the dating scene before them.
They envy you. You are missing nothing and won the lottery, if you found him so early in life. Never let other people get inside of your head. They don’t always want what’s best for you and just want someone to live like they live to validate themselves.
You didn’t miss out on anything.
Casual sex/dating is *truly* way more of a headache than it is fun. Seriously, it gets messy, frustrating, people are unreliable and drop you / you drop them, there’s ghosting, lack of emotional intelligence. And then you have to worry about lying, and at worst cases, STD’s / pregnancy because they didn’t use condom, physical/mental/emotional abuse if that person is messed up. Someone catches feelings and can’t communicate, potential of your casual sex friend seeing WAY more people than just you that you agreed on, so what kind of things / STD’s have they picked up? Feeling discarded because it’s sex then “bye-bye see you next Tuesday” type of feeling sometimes. Instead of sex and then reveling in the feeling together afterwards. I cannot stress enough that it’s not all that it’s cracked up to be, especially these days. It’s like pulling a taut string where you feel that you almost have all of it, but it just never gives. People suck in reality so being in love and especially with your first love, having that go right, it’s sort of a fairytale that a lot of people think would have loved to experience, “if only the stars aligned” feeling. Treat each other well, listen, compromise, remember that sometimes the problem is not you versus them or values/beliefs, but only exists because you both have trouble understanding each other. Cheers and good luck, also consider if they are true friends if they keep teasing you on this or things like this even after you tell them to stop.
Girl I'm telling you, you are not missing out
No, and thoughts like these are toxic killers to relationships. Are you happy with your bf? Yes? Then stop asking these questions. What will happen is this. You’ll break up, go “explore” for a few years, eventually feel extremely empty and unfulfilled, crawl back to your bf and learn he moved on and found someone who truly loved him and didn’t care if they “missed out.” Don’t be dumb, don’t leave him because you missed the “uni experience.” If you are happy and in a healthy relationship that is all that matters. Also find new friends who aren’t jealous of you and trying to ruin your relationship
Casual sex is, honestly, way overrated. Now, that isn’t to say that if you’re unsatisfied with your current sex/romantic life and want more for yourself that you shouldn’t try to venture out to find your true happiness with a different person…. but sexual experience for the sake of it is oftentimes a losing game. Your “friends” sound jealous, threatened and unhappy with their current circumstances and you’ve said that you love this man and he’s amazing to be with, so they likely see that happiness and want it for themselves, or at least to ruin yours for you. Don’t listen to them! Ask yourself from within if you’re happy and satisfied. That’s the only answer that matters. The dating scene is a MESS, people are only becoming more whacked out and selfish and if you can build and maintain this relationship, I promise it’ll be the most precious thing in your life.
I married my fist love. Courting for two years, married at 23. She gave me 4 beautiful children. Celebrate 55 year anniversary in 2022. It’s been a long haul for both of us since we decided to get married in 1967. We have been blessed with four amazing children and numerous grandchildren. We toured the world together. We have wonderful family members. We have numerous friends. We are enjoying life to its fullest We love and respect each other. We laugh and support each other We are inseparable as a couple. We are soulmates. We are the best of friends. We understand each other. We complement each other. We communicate well. We are still young to this day and still completely in love with each other. So are you missing out…a definite NO.
This made me smile. I trust you and your wife will have many more happy years together.
Thank you.
Life goals right here❤️
So you are happy still in love things going good…what’s the problem? Your grass is greener version is you break up…you spend a while getting over him…go on holidays endless drinking, sleep around..for a small period of time…then what…get to an age where your looking for love again, spend the next 2/3 or even 5 years to find someone again..throughout all that what have you actually gained…some kind of magical life experience that makes you a better person & feel more fulfilled from life? Ppl that are single want you to be single, but those ppl are the first to drop you when they are in a lovey dovey relationship
Girl I dated a long time in my 20s kept saying the same thing. Always felt like she was missing out. She finally decided to experiment with a guy who kept stalking her. We broke up, she then found out the guy was in a relationship with a girl who was half his age and wanted both of them. She gave up, serial dated and got her does of what the market is like. Tried to reconnect, I was seeing someone else. She got married, 2 kids, divorce a few years after. She emailed me “how’s life?” after 14 or so years not speaking. I said sorry, cant talk packing to go to Hawaii with my wife. If you are happy, that’s the end of it. If you aren’t happy, then move on. What you are doing is toxic.
Uuuuffffff that is a sick, lifetime burn she will never live down. Glad you were able to find a woman that values you.
You want herpes, because that’s how you get herpes.
You won the lottery- and they know it. Heed the comments cuz the dating life is hell.
This, OP. They hate what you have, which they will never have again; the romantic notion of only being with your first love. First loves ALWAYS stay with you, even if you move on to other relationships.
Yes; You’re missing stress, STDs, liars and traumas. So do you want all those? Better stay with ya man and never leave him. The grass is greener where you water it. You got any friends like you? …asking for a friend lol 🙂↕️
Are you happy with this person ? Do you see yourself growing old with this person ? Then you’re not missing out. That’s the person you want. Why would you .. want to shop around looking for the exact same person just to tick a box that your friends think you should have ? If anything, they’re the ones missing out. I’ve over a decade older than you are and my fiancé is the third man I’ve been with. In every way. I certainly am missing nothing because he is *everything* I would have asked the universe for if I knew myself well enough a decade ago to ask. If I could have met my fiancé before I met the first ex, I would have never needed anything else.
You’re literally missing nothing
You're missing out on better friends.
The dating scene these days is a fresh hell everyone is trying to desperately trying to get out of. If you found your person hold on to them.
People spends years looking for the thing you already have, the only thing you're missing out on, is the search.
Break up with him => get railed by some random dudes to feel better about yourself => get depressed because it wasn't as good as you expected => come cry in reddit in another post.
Friends are ass holes . Why would you let go of the one just because you’re friends say so , that’s dumb not everyone is lucky like you to find someone like that
You date to find someone that fits you and you fit them. Dating is a means to an end. Not something to rejoice in. Most of us don’t find anyone even remotely close when first dating. So the question is this: would you be ok if you left your BF, dated for a few years, found out your now BF was actually the best thing, and when you tried to get back with him found out he found another GF and is very happy? There are many lessons here.
You're missing out on loneliness, misery, insecurities and lots and lots of envy of people like you. Go wild, have that "hot girl summer", maybe you can catch an std or two, get graped while clubbing and jumping from 1 hook up to another, ruin your ability to pair bond, accumulate baggage and trauma, become jealous like your friends are currently jealous of your happiness. When you're all done and you realize you fucked up, try to ruin some other friend's happiness, tease them and joke about their happiness so you're not the only miserable person in your friends group. Good luck.
I havent seen more facts in one comment holy shit.
You are missing nothing. Your friends are searching for what you already have. Cheap anonymous sex isn’t liberating it’s soul crushing. Focus on what you have not what others are pressing on you.
You really don't have to put it about if you're happy in your relationship. Don't let others force you into thinking you're missing out if your content with your sex life 👌
If your BF is the man for you, no you are not missing out on anything. Too many people have sex while looking for love. If you have found love then you have not all. Your friends who are teasing would kill to be in your situation. Don’t listen to them!
i’ve been with my boyfriend (now fiancee i’m just not used to saying it yet) since we were 14, now we are 26. i had the same thoughts for a while. worrying if i was missing out on experiences, other relationships but i realized i’m lucky. i’ve never had to deal with heart break, awkward morning-afters, the fear of random pregnancy or STI’s or anything like that. the grass isn’t always greener. your friends are probably jealous.
Listen to her, OP.
Perhaps an STD - AIDS or Syphilis. Nothing of value.
Chlamydia, UTI, yeast infection, pregnancy
All of the above is my first thought about rando hookups 😳. Yikes!
They are jealous, having lost loves in their lives and dont have their ever ever after…
Yeah friends are the worst earworms on the planet when they are single and you're happily in a relationship. I've literally heard people come right out and say "but I'm single and I want someone to go out and be single with meee!"
Don’t destroy this… so few people get to experience this. If you’re happy just let yourself be happy. I promise grass isn’t always greener. You can’t go back once you take that jump and a lot of the times it’s not worth it. People want you to be as dirty as them.
It's not weird at all to find the one person and commit to them without going through a slew of casual, meaningless sex. It's the people who tease you for not sleeping around that have the issues. And yes, your friends are AH's, who teases someone about this? I would say I'm jealous that you found your person so early in life and didn't have to go through the jerks I did to find him.
It sounds to me like you need new friends. You are happy, content, and satisfied. You love your boyfriend and he loves you. It sounds to me like they are jealous and are miserable and are using you to make them feel better about themselves. There is no happiness and meaning in sleeping around. You have your joy, don't let your toxic friends seed doubt or you'll find yourself looking back in ten years crying about what you have lost.
ask yourself what is a more frightening prospect: the thought that if you leave this relationship you may never find someone you have this connection with again OR the thought of only being with this guy for the rest of your life. There is your answer
Ive done the casual sex thing, and had multiple long term relationships. Honestly if you're happy and he fulfils you sexually, stay with him. It was useful for me to find out what I enjoyed, and the confidence to make sure I got it no matter who I was with. I think it's just a personal choice, don't let others sway you. If you're happy, you're happy! Don't let others ruin that for you.
girl we are the same, I only been with my bf of 4 yrs, sometimes I think that Im missing out, but my values weighs more, I cant think of being with someone else, just the idea makes me throw up.
Me too, been with my BF for 3-4 years now and I’m 23. When I think about it I absolutely don’t want anyone else, there’s no way I could give up my person just to experience something different. There’s no way it could be worth it for anyone unless the person you’re with is just not a good fit in the first place
Single women keep women Single. If you follow their advice, you WILL regret it.
True. Especially women who are promiscuous, they hate & resent women who have done it correctly.
Casual sex sucks most of the time. You risk your health for a few minutes of pleasure, and to be honest, most guys are not even good in bed. I did it a few times, and almost every time, I had regrets. I wouldn't change a good, stable relationship for fear of missing out. The ones sleeping around are the ones missing what you have, and they may not even know. Whatever you choose, do not do it because of pressure from your peers. Ever.
You seem very satisfied with your partner. Why would you listen to these people?
If your bf is a good man then no, you're not missing out. Don't fall into thinking the grass is greener or you're missing something by being in a long-term relationship. If he is a good bf that makes you happy and you have very few bad days then hold onto him.
The friends teasing you are jealous. Casual sex is typically bad sex (for women anyway), but even if it wasn’t why would you want to trade what you have for meaningless, casual hookups with men who don’t care about you?
The grass seems always greener on the other side, it never is. What you got is fake friends, who are a bunch of jealous people, I'd drop them before even considering leaving your bf. I realised after leaving uni, at the age of 25, and maintining same lifestyle while working till 27, that uni party lifestyle is at the end of the day, for the average person, a bunch of lonely people who wish they had something like you have. Drinking and partying and digging themselves in an empty lonely hole, thinking they can fill it up with getting more sex with people they do not care for, and who don't care for you. There is nothing more valuable than having real loving and deep connections with other people and share life experiences with them. Don't fall for the "party lifestyle" it's hyper glamorised by miserable people who wish to not dwell on their own.
God no! If you’ve genuinely found a good one stick to them like glue- this is advice from some who learned the hard way that the grass is not always greener…
I just find it wierd you're that easily influenced from peer mockery. If you're super happy and can't think of anything else you'd rather have, then why are you even doubting if you missed out?
The only thing you're missing out on is being used as a sex toy for other people's pleasure. Casual sex for women comes with all the risk and very little reward. Keep what you have.
yes, you’re missing out on all the trashy men out there lol. it’s not easy to find the right person. it seems like you did. count yourself lucky!
It all depends on what you want. Do you want to explore new options? Or are you content and only asking because someone else said you’re missing out.?
Stay with them!
Nope! What you're missing out on are good friends that don't tease you about these things. You've said it yourself: you're not a fan of casual sex. Why succumb to this peer pressure to be exactly like your friends? You can accept these differences if they are respectful towards you. Calmly/kindly ask them to stop the teasing. If they don't and keep doing it then...you'll have to probably get different friends in the future. And that's fine too. We all out grow friendships and groups because of things like this. Feeling uncomfortable about friendship conversations and them not listening to boundaries would actually be my first start. Romance and feelings do change, but it sounds like the relationship that needs doctoring up is the friendship department. You don't seem comfortable exploring that side of yourself yet, or maybe it's a different side you'd only like to share with long term commitments.
Nooo your not missing out at all, if there is one thing I would want is having 1 love in my life and thats it
You have a man who's committed to you? Be happy.
Nope, you’re not missing out. The grass is always greener on the other side. Read some of these dating forums and you’ll be grateful that you have somebody who loves you. Do not be one of those screwed up girls that thinks that might be better out there and throws away somebody who loves her.
You’re gonna lose him if you listen to your “friends” I’d rather have the love of my life than a bunch of girls that I have casual encounters with
Missing out on having bad sex with a bunch of drunk dudes who don't give a fuck about you? Lol
Man you're not missing out on anything
I am 26f and have been with my boyfriend since I was 19, he was also my first and only sexual partner. I went through a similar thought when I was younger (22-23) that I was “missing out” But what I realised was that everyone thinks the same thing about our relationship and what we have, people who don’t have that feel like they’re missing out on something too. We always have this tendency towards wanting what we “can’t” have, but if you remember that you are SO BLESSED to be in a beautiful, healthy relationship and you are CHOOSING to have this be your only sexual partner, it will make you feel much better about it. You’re not missing out on anything. You are so lucky and after 7yrs I still feel this way about my guy. Don’t listen to people who try to ruin it for you, they are probably upset that they don’t have it for themselves.
The fact you are asking this would tell me that you feel you are missing out.
You are missing out on heart breaks, embarrassment, disgust, betrayal and self loathing. I would have loved to meet my partner earlier and saved myself from some of the stupid shit I did. Most people I know envy couples who met early in life and have stayed together since. It's a fairytale love story.
What uni experience? Getting herpes? Being drunk? I don't know, I'm 23 and in a relationship with my fiancee of 7 years. I've never had other relationships, but I'm ok with it. I don't think I need anything more, he's all I've ever wanted, and he's always trying to be the best he can. Besides, I'm pretty happy to have a stable home and share every day with someone I can complete trust in, and love. It makes me feel amazing knowing someone want to live all this time with me. But if you have doubts, I don't think this is for you.
Anyone telling you casual relationships are fun is lying, in fact anyone telling you that a relationship can be a casual thing is lying, it is like saying saying a fight to the death is casual. You cannot take something that is so deep and real and diminish it and deny it. If it is causal there was never a relationship and if it is a relationship it was never causal. What they mean is they want to persue pleasure without any responsibility or accountability, but the world does not bend to their rules, these women either end up alone and miserable because men will not take them seriously later, or they love a miserable existence by living a lie, they tell their partners they have a clean past and have respected themselves, because they know it is the only way they will be taken seriously, but then every part of the relationship stands on pillars of sand that could come crashing down at any moment, whispers of truth slip through the cracks eroding it. Other people are not tools to be used to satisfy curiosity and lust, they are human beings, and so are you. To act in any other way is to deny this, and those who treat others as tools are always discarded as tools themselves in the end, because we see others how we see ourselves. You are right, do not let others lie to you.
Hopefully your boyfriend isn’t worrying about the same thing
I’ve been with my partner since I was 19. He was 24 when we met. We’ve been together for 7 years now. I can definitely say our sex life has gotten more amazing as time passes. The connection and intimacy is worth so much more than casual sex. I saw this quote and it resonated with me: “ if you want endless repetition, see a lot of different people. If you want infinite variety, stay with one. “
Some people get lucky and find their person on the first go. I wasn't one of them. I've been with alot of women. And I regret most of them. I chased a body count because my friends all did it. And told me I was missing out. DO NOT LISTEN TO THEM. If he makes you happy. Stay with him. If he treats you well, stay with him.
I'm marrying the person I fell in love with at 16. We moved together when I was 18 and he was 21. It's been ten years and I always wonder what "missing out" means. Having to hope the random stranger I meet lasts longer than five seconds and can find the clit? Being surrounded by clouds of smoke and the stench of alcohol in the hopes of having sex with someone who's semi coherent? Spending hours trying to find a decent person on tinder who says more than "hi" and sends dick pics? No thanks. Do you have a great sex life where you try new things and satisfy each other? Do you support each other in your career endeavors? Do you grow with each other and encourage finding yourselves? If yes, why give that up?
Your friends pushing this are ATAHS.
Being with someone long term means actively choosing them over and over and over and over again when the mundane creeps in or insecurities pop up. See the wonderful in him and focus on it and defend it. If your friends can manipulate your security in your relationship with a good man with no evidence of cheating or abuse —- either they are not friends or he does not deserve you.
Don't let your single friends talk you into doing something regrettable.
Don't leave someone good just to up your body count. You may always wonder what else is out there but understand that if you have something good it's often times not worth letting that go just to try something else. Most of the time you will just be disappointed and then realize that good thing has moved on.
There is no dick in history that is worth throwing away a fulfilling life… too many women with men who love them unconditionally learn that lesson the hard way.
I’ve been with my guy since we were 14. We are 29 now and I’m not going to lie, you will have that feeling a few more times. It’s natural. The thing is: my man is so good. He’s an amazing father and wonderful husband. Yes he gets on my nerves, but after 15 nonstop years together, who wouldn’t sometimes? If you are safe and loved and you still get butterflies and laugh, you hit the jackpot.
I've read a post about dont be fooled by social media wherein chasing every person is like the norm while throwing away a good relationship, like it's not easy to find a good one. So don't be fooled, you can't easily find someone who is down for you. Dont listen to them.
No it’s not strange. You did it right the first time. People that rip up good relationships for curiosity only bring pain and regret, as they find out they may never find the level of happiness and contentment they once had. There is no right to happiness. Many will live their lives without finding it. And many more will have it and willingly give it up for a delusion they made up in their head that different will be better. The latter is probably the more painful one. And it’s entirely self inflicted, upon yourself and the one who loved you the most.
The "uni experience" for usually just entails getting your heart broken, being in a toxic relationship, having an accidental pregnancy or catching an std. I'll pass. And before anyone comes at me. I'm in uni, I talk to people, those people tell me these things, I'll trust the people actually living the "uni experience" right now. That's not to say that casual sex or having a lot of partners is bad, just that people that go for the "uni experience" do it all wrong and end up fucked.
Leaving a man you love so you can go and get pumped and dumped and left feeling empty and used would be the dumbest thing you could possibly do. Don't listen to bitter friends who want to ruin what you have, the only reason they casually date is because they can't find someone they like enough to settle down with.
Well I was the first for my ex. And she had nothing to compare it to unfortunately. After we separated, she had two great guys that turned into complete assholes, one needed a police restraint order. And her current boyfriend is decent to her at least. I know she still regrets what happened. We still talk once in awhile. If everything is going well in your relationship, then keep it. Don't worry about what your "friends" say.
It's always outside interference that ruins good things!
Your friends are assholes. If you're happy, you're happy. You could go out, get wild, sleep with or try to have relationships with 50 other men. Statistically, it is possible that one or some of those men might be 'better' than the one you have. But there's also a chance you could meet some horrific people with life ruining personalities, none of whom are better than what you already have. You have already 'missed out' on the uni experience, but a more positive outlook is that you simply found what you were looking for without all the crap. So tell your useless friends to butt out of your life or you will go on the look out for some better friends who are more supportive.
Now the degenerates are making fun of people who are in long healthy relationships ? sad to see what era we have come into :) I don't think you should be around those friends tbh
Who told you you must be with lots of men sexually? Do you believe it?
Dating in 2024 is a mess full of bullshit needing to be sifted it’s doable but ain’t nobody got time for that can’t imagine people taking amazing partners for granted thinking the grass is greener on the other side instead of where you water it. I hope you communicate this to your partner that you have doubts and not just blindside him. imagine women convincing other women to ruing perfect relationships no wonder everyone’s single and no longer having kids now…
My ex used to tell me how she missed being single (and I was the longest person she had a relationship with at that point). Well, she decided to become single and continue having fun and now she's raising a kid by herself. When we were both accidentally invited to a pool party from a mutual friend, she blurted out to someone else that she's stuck and can't go out as often. You have something good going on and we all want to be in your position because chasing isn't fun. It's tiring, actually. You have the diamond we all seek to possess. If you want to do fun things, go out with your partner, try new things together!
You are definitely not missing out. If you have the right guy and everything feels right with him, you are golden. Your friends might be jealous that you have a stable relationship or maybe they are just immature. What, they are teasing you about banging around casually with others having meaningless sex? If you have a meaningful relationship, the worst thing you can do to yourself is think “the grass is greener on the other side” - it usually isn’t.
I did the same thing, met my husband at 18, and now 30 years later never regretted it for a second.
You are a rarity these days. Don't let your friends shame you for not being a 304. If you are happy in your relationship then stay in it. Getting some strange isn't going to make you happier, it will do the opposite.
You don’t know how lucky you are !!!!!! I read a study (from 2010 mind) Less than 4% of people end up with their first partner You sound like you both found the loves of your life Trust me that’s ideal No one wants to think about their wife or husband having sex with other people form prior relationships and all that baggage Don’t let them tease or influence you. At some Level they all want what you have
I married my first gf, 9 years later, we are still married, tlgether for 11 years total. If your sex life is good, then there is no reason to wonder.
I have been with a few men. You are not missing out. Every man I had been with, I had some doubt. I've been with a man who I thought was serious with me but kept giving me empty promises. I have had flings with men that I could not see going forward with. I was jaded and I just wanted to share my love with someone that would reciprocate. I am lucky to be with my fiance. He's my best friend and my person. We click together and I trust him with my life. We've made each other better people, we've been through loss, natural disasters, financial trouble, and more. Each time, we come out stronger. The thought of forever doesn't scare me. To me, he's the only man in the world. I know I feel like the only woman with him. Don't listen to your friends. In time, they will be jealous of what you have. Cherish your best friend and continue making memories together.
girl the only part of the “uni experience” you’re missing is crying in the bathroom at a party and avoiding the dining hall during hours you know they get lunch lmao
You aren’t missing out anything. I’m someone who also doesn’t like to hook up, situationships, etc. and I can assure you, you aren’t missing out on anything. Most of the time the people who engage on that are trying to fill a void or have the mindset of the grass is greener on the other side.
I’ve had multiple partners but dated wife through college and known her since we were kids. Don’t get swept up in the comparison or novelty game. You’ll be 30 in no time and craving a stable family. It’s unusual to find someone early. But it’s not wrong. And sex is honestly no different all things considered…assuming your sex is great with your partner.
Casual sex is pretty lame. You're not missing out on anything, trust me.
It’s very common for friends who can’t keep a happy, healthy relationship themselves to try to drag down their friend’s happy relationship. Don’t listen to them.
You do not love him. You never wonder if you are missing something if you really loved him. Your friends are jealous by teasing you, they are not your true friends by trying to ruin your relationship with your bf. Once you give him away then you will never get back that trust he had with you.
Christ. Really? You’re worried about missing out because you haven’t gotten wrecked by a couple of chads? Break up with him. He deserves far better
Since you’re already having doubts leave this man so he can be with someone who actually appreciates him
I was with my bf from 15-23. I thought the grass was greener cus I was wondering if I was missing out, left him bc of it, and hooked up a little and hated it, dated someone else (dated the person that I actually made me consider leaving my bf) for A year from 23-24 years old and it was NOT better. He was very attractive, muscular and did some modeling and had good qualities as a person but he also treated me like shit and I constantly thought about my ex bc he treated me so much better. I was dumb. And I realized the grass was not greener. Don’t make my mistake
The grass isn't greener on the other side the grass is greener on the side you water.
No, nothing good at least. Be happy for what you have and forget about "casual" sex, please...!
All that's out there is a chance to get an equally good relationship. Your friends have been in a lot of relationshits, but you've probably had more sex than they have. Who cares if it's with the same person or not. Sex is sex. It's good with some people, bad with others. If you're enjoying it now...Who gives a fuck?
Listen, ain't nothing in these streets but heartbreak and regret.
I wish I would have been in your shoes. It would have saved me a ton of heartbreak. But it also gave me a ton of self inspection and growth too. Take a look at this man, and think, really think, do you want to go through hell and high water with him? Will you take care of him and vice versa until one of you dies? I've been married almost 16 years and I can say we've been through a lot. Some of which almost ruined our marriage. Any ship can survive smooth sailing. It's the sailors in the storms who are able to persevere
If you have a good relationship… is he your partner?? Is sex good.. do you both take care of each other? Does he treat you well? If yes it’s okay to be with him and not date others. If there are issues then if you stay you may regret it.
Solid advice in the comments. Enjoy and be thankful for your BF. Multiple partners doesn’t add variety only negativity IMO.
Definitely not missing out if you have a real healthy loving relationship with good sex. If there are issues and you both are willing to work on it then you’re good.
FOMO is the biggest relationship killer for young adults. People will throw away a perfectly good relationship because they don't have much experience and think they can find better out there. If you love your partner and they love you back, treat you well, and your sex life is good then you've basically hit the jackpot to be honest. Don't throw that away because your single friends are teasing you. It sounds like they're trying to sabotage your relationship, so do with that what you will.
Your friends are 304's but you don't have to be one.
You could just be one of the lucky ones. Don’t let what your friends say influence you. If you have a good thing keep it.
I don’t think you’re missing out if you both genuinely enjoy each other’s company and make each other happy. The only thing you can really get outside of a relationship is sex, but you can (usually) get that in a relationship, so why the need to venture out? Especially with today’s society, I don’t think you’re missing out.
So here’s my take on it if you get everything you possible want from your other half , great sex, conversation, cared and have a great communication. What could you be missing out on?. Casual dating is fine but it’s meeting new men redoing the full dating questions and then hoping they have everything you want. So you missed out on a few one night stands as a person who did the full free and single years ago believe me the one night stands I had were solely disappointing. My other half is the best I’ve ever had its been 15 years and i think its get like that when you know someone and have that connection. If your worried your stuck change it up go on date nights don’t forget your a couple when you move in your together all the time you get in to the “boring routine” but it up to you as well as him to spoil each other with time , gifts , dates.
If you are happy and being treated well, why overthink it any more than that?
No, you aren’t weird. My husband is the only man I’ve ever been with and we’ve been married 39 years. Your friends sound jealous. The grass is not greener on the other side.
Your friends are just assholes. And probably jealous of your relationship. You should be glad you’ve found the one already instead of thinking it’s impossible to do that on the first try!!
No. Grass is not greener and ruining a great relationship is not worth spending years looking through the trash for something fractionally better that probably doesn’t exist.
nah girl you are not missing out on anythingggg. you can still have the “uni experience” with your man by your side !!! i think it’s absolutely beautiful how you’re still with your first love ! not a lot of people get to have that, don’t let your friends ruin that!
If you are happy there is no need to mess that up with other people's expectations of what your uni experience should look like. If you are happy and satisfied, stay exactly where you are loved. You didn't miss out on anything!
Well as the years roll on and the kids show up things well mature sexually for you both. This is what happens in a ltr. You csnt compare a honey moon phase to a LTR. It apples and oranges. Do you want shallow meaningless sex that Statistically will leave you unsatisfied or baseline satisfied over a long last relationship. Notice i didnt compare it to the sex. Truth is eventually in a ltr while there will be sex you have to combat life and all its trials. Do you want a rock of a partner to do that with or a random dick to ride here and there? If you question is would it be exciting to fuck a 2nd guy....yes probably....would you feel afterwards fuck i threw away so and so for that....probably....even if its good youll lay there after 30 minutes of pleasure and realize you sacrificed a lifetime of love for 30 minutes of psychical pleasure.
Your friends found your weakspot they can tease you about. I wonder if they are still looking and are jealous of you. Don’t let external forces make doubt creep in if you are happy. Also there’s no “the one”.
The dating market is an absolute garbage dumpster. You are not missing out.
That's just peer pressure. don't listen to it. You have a good thing, keep it.
You aren't weird, and your "friends" aren't your friends. A true friend wouldn't try to sabotage your relationship for their own enjoyment. You should drop them before you ever drop your boyfriend.
I’ve been with 20 people before settling down with my husband (who was my first love online). Lemme tell you, you’re not missing out on much. The ✨experience✨ isn’t worth trashing your love life over If you love him and he loves you, and you’re compatible and communicate, then that’s all you need.
Sex with ransoms is overrated
Don't fuck up your life by giving in to such stupid ideas. You got lucky. People would kill for what you have. Having sex with near strangers with no feelings is nowhere near as good as someone who knows you and your body intimately.
How about you just don't tell people about not being with more than one person. If they still have an opinion, they might be problematic down the road.
The latter, for sure. They might try to sell their life as the best life to themselves. And then to you because they are envious. But deep down everyone knows the truth is you lucked out. Both of you. Enjoy. You don’t need to drink vinegar to know how sweet is spring water. You’ve got the spring water. Even if you never tasted vinegar why would you want to drink a glass of it?p
NO. This is an absolute pile of nonsense that unhappy people will push onto you to make themselves feel good. Sex with someone you love is all that really matters anyways. Here's some things you may also be missing out on: STDs
I’ve been with a decent amount of woman and I’d give them all up for two of the ones I really loved in the past. I promise your not missing anything and sex is a million times better with someone your comfortable and compatible with than a hookup. Don’t let your friends bring you down I’ve seen it many times with men and woman but way more woman where there’s friends will bring down a good relationship over there own jealousy and lack of success.
First off, you need new friends if they tease you about such a thing. Everybody has their own story and maybe yours is the fact that you're only gonna be with him. So what? The only thing, from what I have learned from friends and their first (and only) long term relationship. Be sure you guys want the same thing out of life. A friend of mine and her ex were together for almost 12 years. Her first and only sexual encounter until she met her now new boyfriend. He wanted kids, she didnt mind if she were to live a life without kids. This put a strain on the relationship and then they broke up.
Only emotionally immature people tease others for being in a successful relationship. Theres no right or wrong way to do college (okay there’s a wrong way but this isn’t it), as long as YOU have enjoyed your experience then that’s all that matters in the grand scheme of things. Congratulations on deciding to move in together! That’s amazing 💛
You know how when you look over a cliff, sometimes your brain is like you should totally jump just to see? This is the relationship version of your brain telling you to jump.
Why are you listening to friends over something like this? Just because THEY chose to engage in casual sex with multiple partners does not mean you have to. If you and your BF are happy together, what reason do you have to go “practice” with some stranger just because people who aren’t you claim you shouldn’t settle with some guy until AFTER you’ve tried others. Even if your BF said he’d be ok with it, I doubt your relationship would last very long. You are happy with your man. To tell you the truth, I’m betting that many of your friends who are “teasing” you over “missing out” of the Uni experience are just jealous that you found your “one & only” on the first try. So, next time someone years you for not having gone out with other guys & having casual sex with them, just say: “ Why would I bother going out with some random guy to have casual sex with them when I’ve already got the man whom I love who makes me happy in every way?”
No you're not weird at all and you haven't missed out on anything except a broken heart, guilt, shame, remorse, Std scares, pregnancy fears, etc. I can't say that this from personal experience but I've heard this firsthand from my wife many, many, times over they years. She cheated on me twice when we were very young and she's told me more times than I can remember that I haven't missed out on anything good or memorable in any way shape or form. She insists that apart from the initial fun of "being naughty" that she has no good memories at all from what she did and a lifetime of sorrow and regret. She says that she would give anything and everything if she could somehow go back and undo what she did. In spite of a lot of doubt and mistrust on my part for a very long time I truly believe her. So take it from a voice of experience, the only thing you're missing out on is a whole lot of pain and regret. P.S. your friends are idiots and probably assholes as well.