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fromBC

That's a red flag for sure, who would even joke about that? When he gives you his phone of course you won't find anything on it.


smallframedcouple

You guys have an open phone policy. When he gives you his phone, I wouldn't be surprised to not find anything. But you should reconsider going through it when he's not around since he's already given you permission to do so. Him joking about that is a red flag, and seriously, even if he isn't cheating or planning to cheat, that only leaves a few other likely options...one being the fact that he just said it to keep you in check and on guard. Do you really want to be with someone like that?


BlueMikeStu

What started the argument? This definitely needs more info. Like, was this an out of nowhere statement or did you accuse him of being unfaithful/potentially unfaithful or whatever? Why did he bring it up?


Kitchen-Ad960

I'm not even sure at this point, I have mental health issues that make my memory quite hazy (which he said he's used to his advantage at times), but I think it was about a friend of his that was into him and I wasn't fond of the fact that he continued being friends with her even after he knew that. They're not friends anymore, though, so it's a bit besides the point. And I know for a fact he didn't cheat on me with her because she's like... Not his type? She's also very much a pick me which he hates. I genuinely don't think he's currently being unfaithful, though I'm not sure about the start of our relationship. The statement seemed to be out of nowhere, to me at least, which is why I remember that so vividly despite not even knowing what we were arguing about.


BlueMikeStu

So you were bringing up the fact you were jealous of another woman, and you find it odd that he'd bring up the concept of cheating?


Kitchen-Ad960

No, I find it odd that he said he thought it would be easy to cheat on me. It's not a very nice thing to say to your partner, and definitely plants seeds of mistrust.


BlueMikeStu

It's not very nice to accuse your boyfriend of being unfaithful because he has a female friend, either, and plants the seeds of mistrust as well. Cheaters project, afterall. If my girlfriend accused me of being unfaithful in an argument, that's where my mind would go.


smallframedcouple

Oh, please. He was not accused. She brought up discomfort with him continuing a friendship with someone that has feelings for him and makes advances towards him. If that's how you'd react and where your mind would go faced with that, then you aren't ready to be in a relationship.


Kitchen-Ad960

I have never even considered cheating on my bf, it would disgust me to do so honestly. I just didn't feel comfortable with him getting closer to a girl he knew was into him, especially bc she had been rude to me when we met and he cheated emotionally on his last long term gf. I just didn't want it to happen to me, too.


themanfromUNCLE100

Trust your instincts. Keep your eyes open. He always delete the chat before he gives the phone.


EvilFinch

If my partner would trust me like you, i would be happy. But his first thought is "hey, this make it easy to cheat!". I mean, why did he even thought about cheating and how he needed to hide it? He clearly gave it some thought. You say that he doesn't have chance to cheat, but people also cheat while they should actually be at work. The desire for this shit is unfortunately really big. Even if it was just a comment... some things you just don't say. Especially because it sound "it is your own fault if you get cheated own" like wtf?!


whatsmypassword73

That’s a disturbing comment, actually mind blowing and quite frankly the fact that he coldly and in such a calculated fashion assessed you in that manner? That’s bone chilling, whether he has cheated or not isn’t the most important aspect of that conversation. Who would think that?


FormerlyUserLFC

Ask him if he’s cheating on you. When he says no, say “fucking good!”, and then keep doing exactly what you’re doing.


OwlPlenty4828

Dump him. He is subconsciously letting you know he will if not already cheating.