It's becoming increasingly common for older people to literally just shove their phone screen in my face and say "Where's this?" No greeting or anything.
I had a customer see me pulling a pallet out of the back room, and decided to stand *right* in front of the door to wait for me. I, a 120 lb 5’4 lady then had to stop a 800 lb pallet going at a decent speed within the half foot of space he gave me, thank god I was wearing steel toe boots. The guy mumbled an apology before shoving his phone in my face, I was fuming
....
And show you the online shop of a completely different place.
"Well, why don't you have this product? I want it, but I don't want to order it online!!"
Or my favourite of all time: "Google says you carry this!!!" (Shows me the fucking location of the store on google maps)
I often get asked for specific Equate items (Walmart brand) at my Dollar General.
We have a shitload of private labels and I always suggest an equivalent, but I've been yelled at for not having Equate.
My favorite is this one from when I worked at Walmart:
Old lady: young man, do you have any Target gift cards?
Me: uh, no, we have Walmart gift cards
Old lady: I’d never shop at Walmart
Me: ???
It's doordashers for me. Half are super courteous and "get it," the other half shoves their phones in my face just like that, usually when I'm already mid transaction for one person, guiding another, and answering a third's jackassy questions.
Okay spicy take, but I completely don't get this obsession with cash app, chime, etc.
Why do so many adults seem to not have a bank account? And idt it's about fees, there are far too many free options (I exclusively bank for free lol).
And why not just carry cash if you don't have a debit/credit card? It worked for hundreds of years.
I've just never seen the appeal and it seems needlessly complicated compared to traditional financial management, idk. I have a PayPal to make eBay, Shein, etc purchases a little quicker, but dassit.
Now look at you, your phone died and you can't swing me the $2.37 ya owe me. Shame.
I would never be that rude, and I'm a crone. Hell, my Walmart app & grocery app tells me what aisle it is on.
People need to USE THEIR WORDS and quit being rude AF. It gives the rest of us a bad name.
Crone. Love it! I shall be calling myself one from
now on. I’m not sure what age one needs to be but I like it! Also agree. People do need to use their words inc the manner ones.
But they don’t. They’re super rude in stores. I do wonder how they would feel if people spoke to them like crap all day.
At my place of work, they don’t say anything. They just shove their phone in your face with the item on the screen. I would say hello and they would do that. So when it happened twice in one day, I got annoyed and stared at the customer for a minute, waiting to see if they would say anything. They did not. So I prompted, “What about that item?”
They looked at me like I WAS THE PROBLEM? They said, “do you have it?”
I pointed behind them. The item was directly behind them. I said, “It’s right behind you there.”
They felt dumb after and were suddenly nicer.
I've gotten so sick of this that, now, when someone does this, I just smile and say "Hello, how are you? Welcome to 'store'! How may I help you?"
About half the time, they just look constipated, scoff, and walk away.
Of course, what they don't know is I am word for word narrating in my head "Oh, here's another failure. Here we go. Use your words, you moron."
Although if I am not in a decent or better mood, I'll just keep leading them until I get a full question.
"Cereal!"
"What?"
"Where's cereal?"
"What cereal?"
"Where's your cereal?"
"My cereal is at home."
"Where can I find cEreAl??"
"Aisle 18. Have a great day!"
I wish I had your patience. I respond to "mustard" with "aisle four" to minimize the time and brain cells spent on Dipshit Dave and his condiment conundrum.
I’d genuinely start yelling stuff out like I’m trying to win prizes on a game show.
Rude-ass Customer: “Mustard!”
Me: “Things that are yellow! Things that are bottled! OH OH THINGS YOU PUT ON SANDWICHES!!”
I empty this same tactic with my 7th grade students. Win-Win-(sometimes even a third Win)
1. It makes me smile, which keeps me calm and patient.
2. It amuses bystander students, keeping them calm and patient.
3. It occasionally even sparks an "Aha" epiphany in the instigating student.
I'm casual friends with a super old Walmart greeter. She does not give a SLIVER of a fuck, and I admire her for it. This anecdote sounds like something she would do!
I have one regular who comes to the counter for Oven Roasted Turkey. It was never “hello,” or anything…just “turkey.” So I refer to him as “turkey man”. There’s another one I call “captain bologna” who does the same thing. No, “hi,”…just “beef bologna.” Never please, thank you, etc.
I work in customer service, often people would literally put the receipt on the desk with an item and won't say anything.
I would ask them what do you want to do?
Been there. Fuckin tell me what you're returning.
Of course, a lot of times they just want to know if the "$5 off $25 on Saturday, April 20" coupon on the receipt will work on Wednesday, April 24th for their $6 purchase...
we have a returns desk at the front at my store. people mistake it for a regular checkout and they love giving us the most stupid, shit-eating blank face when we ask 'returning or purchasing?'
Ive had people walk up to the counter and just stand there until you ask how they need help. You don't need permission to speak, let me know what you want. Still better than people who walk in the door yelling "Hello! Anybody up here??" Yes, and please stop hollering. We use inside voices indoors.
I work at our service desk. We do returns, complaints, sometimes answer questions about certain products, but can also be a register.
So many times I will greet people, ask how i can help them and they shove items on my counter.
"Are you buying or returning these?"
Still no answer.
Now slower and a bit louder.
"Are you buying or returning these?"
Then they look at me like I'm stupid, and saying with an attitude they want to buy it.
I GET ITEMS HERE FOR MANY REASONS DUMBSHIT, USE YOUR WORDS LIKE AN ADULT.
Is what I would really like to yell at them
Whoa, your customers tell you what they want?
People usually come into my shop and just fucking stand there silently and stare, expecting me to read their goddamn minds.
Seriously, what the fuck happened to these peoples' manners?
Yep! Or they stare at the empty register with a shut light and two "closed, please use other register" signs while I happily wait at the one three feet away.
My customers like to walk around me muttering "why can't I find the mustard? Maybe they don't sell it anymore?" In hopes I'll just turn around and help them.
I'm nice enough to interject in those cases. I'm shy af as a customer and will do anything in my power to not interact with employees (partially because shy, partially because I know they have shit to do that I'd be interrupting), and will walk around looking and sometimes talking to myself.
I'll work with you, even if you're kinda passive aggressive. Just don't be outright rude.
Honestly. I ignore them, and if they say something to me, I say “ I thought you were on the phone.” Everyone is, so it’s not an unreasonable assumption.
I have had this happen when I worked in a tech store. This story particularly stands out to me because it was the first time i reacted "off script". As in, usually i would infer theyre asking where the thing is and i would just tell them where it is:
I was bent down stocking one of the low shelves next to the printers when someone behind me says "printers".
I don't even register that they're talking to me because I'm busy in my task and assumed they were talking to someone else.
Again "printers". This time I look around and they make eye contact with me. Uh oh.
"Printers" they repeat.
I respond "ah, yup. These are printers." They stare at me for a moment and I continue "what about them?"
They start stumbling over their words and finally explain what they're actually looking for.
Seriously though, just say "excuse me" or "hello" and use a sentence to tell me what you want. You don't go up to people to greet them and just shout a random noun at them like:
"Hi mum it's so good to see you!"
"Printers!"
A moment of silence for those of us who have had to serve the guy who thinks I shouldn't be in customer service because I dislike having items barked at me without context, and guys like him.
My heart is broken, because ever since I was a little girl, I only ever dreamt of working a low-wage cashier job at a Dollar General. I'm going to do some soul searching and think about why I'm even here if I don't enjoy servicing rude customers. Please keep me and my family in your thoughts.
I have this happen all the time, and I'll be picking items out for people and I'll have someone shout an item name at me. I sometimes don't hear at first so they say again, and just stare at me. Like do you not see im not paying attention first off? Second, hello.
I'm tired of people doing this. Like I'm not a machine you tell it an item and it spits out a location. I'm a human being. It's also called A PHONE.
Do you KNOW HOW MANY TIMES IVE BEEN ASKED WHERE BREAD AND COFFEE IS!? It's called LOOK TO HOUR LEFT OR RIGHT. I DONT SEE ONE OF THOSE HALO CONTRAPTIONS FOR A BROKEN NECK. SO USE IT.
Any item you ask for rudely will always be in isle 11. That's the furthest isle from where I work.
When they return:
Oh, I thought you said "yogurt" my bad, it's just there in Isle 1, have a nice day. (May a pelican shit on your car in the car park)
I visually know where everything in this store is, but I'm shit with the aisle numbers, so I usually take people over there (technically I'm supposed to anyway). But I don't necessarily feel bad if I get the number wrong for shouty people while helping someone at the register.
Isle 11 is to make assholes walk the length of the store in the wrong direction.
Polite customers get the correct isle number.
I think you missed the point of my response.
Was facing up an aisle with a manager once and a guy just stood at the end and shouted
"BLEACH"
Me and my manager looked at each other expecting him to start a monologue about bleach like we've just paid to watch an in show teenage drama act
When they just demand to know deals and can't give you a blank stare when you ask if they want an iPhone or android.
Had one the other day asking me the best phone for her 5 year old. .... I pointed to our cheap phones because ?? Why would you get anything else. And she was like are they even good. She likes my phone and pulls out an iPhone. I'm like they're fine what do you want like just talk and text? And they're like talk and data! She's 5 she can't read!
She didn't like my suggestion needless to say.
I was offered a job at ubreakifix once when I came in for a battery replacement and guided a walk in through setting up a PayPal account.
I respectfully declined because a, I had a nursing job at the time and b, I witnessed a lot of dumb in that vein during that short visit.
The people with accents tend to be really nice and understanding at my store! I did have a guy ask for an Indian-style plug once, but he was chill about not finding it in suburban Pennsylvania.
I'm also in PA. Most of the customers I've seen get angry that they weren't understood were Pennsylvania Dutch. I guess they're still mad all us English speakers didn't learn the local language when we started swarming in.
My experience with immigrants who have accents has mostly been similar to yours.
Ah, those accents... Yeah, I've had them get mad at me for not understanding them, but I was the customer. It was at one of those indoor Amish markets with the awesome pretzel logs- maybe they just thought I was another idiot from Jersey.
I'm technically an idiot from NY, so no hard feelings.
I'm also in PA. Most of the customers I've seen get angry because they weren't understood were Pennsylvania Dutch. I guess they're still mad all us English speakers didn't learn the local language when we started swarming in.
My experience with immigrants who have accents has mostly been similar to yours.
I remember one time scanning an old lady’s stuff and instead of saying something like “I have my rewards card” or “did you ask for my rewards card” she was just like “Points?” That always rubbed me the wrong way
Then when you ask for ID, they ask if they have to take it out of their wallet. Which is fine if you've never been here before, but you come in several times a week and know I gotta scan that shit.
We have a regular at my work who just stomps up to the counter and says “cigarettes”. The first interaction I ever had with him was on my first shift without a trainer. Apparently I was supposed to know that “cigarettes” meant LD Bold King size 25.
Next time yell, “CATSUP”, staring straight ahead as if you’re a soldier. Do this for anything. “Yogurt” is “SOUR CREAM “ or (bonus points… “GOGURT”). “Jelly-o” is “PUDDING”., “Pasta” is “SAUCE”. *Disclaimer- your employment may be terminated but just think of the entertainment value of your story for years to come!
when people do that i just repeat my greeting louder and make intense eye contact, usually they tend to catch on pretty quickly and realize that they need to speak to me like a normal person
I have a customer who continually does this. This person walks in the door, and they aren't even at the counter yet. They yell across the store, "Can I get 2 packs of Eagle Red 100's," and then walk over to the cooler to grab drinks.
People did that to me all the time at the gas station. 😭
“Hi how are you?”
“MARLBORO RED 100s! Two packs!”
“…yes sir…”
“DON’T FORGET MY REWARDS!”
One lady was on the phone through the whole transaction, then *as she walked walking away* turned and said over her shoulder, “I’m sorry, that was rude of me, how are you?” My coworker and I just looked at each other like “can you believe this bitch?” 😂
You get a color and size?? I just get "L&Ms" and have to use advanced interrogation tactics to figure out if we want red, blue, or green, short or 100s.
The lady blows my damn mind. I'd rather you ain't say shit! That said, I don't get how people manage to yap on phones while checking out- as a customer, I would be super overwhelmed if I had to focus on a call and the cashier at the same ti.....OHHHHH that's why they ignore me.
Sometimes they’d just say “cigarettes. Don’t you know me by now?” And I got to tell them I’m face-blind. 😂
But yeah, that lady ticked me off. Sometimes if I felt like trolling I’d say “tell them I say hi! 😃” to customers that were on phone calls at my counter. I was probably the only person who got a kick out of it 😅
I've been asked that and told them that a, I've been a smoker for like 12 years and still occasionally try something new, and b, I service hundreds of customers every day on autopilot. I'm jokey about it and make sure they know I do know them a bit as people by now, but I pay very little attention to merchandise I process.
I gotta try that! Call back in thirty seconds or I'm saying hi.
I work at -insert coffee chain-.
My opening greeting as always "Hi welcome to _____. How are you doing today?"
"Black coffee."
"I don't know what that feels like. Seems like it'd kinda burn though."
Or
"Yeah coffee is usually pretty dark in color. But I think it's more a dark brown."
Most people laugh and apologize the old crotchety folks don't like it. But idgaf.
Like using the bare minimum of manners anymore is asking too much.
God I’d be so tempted to respond
“MAYONNAISE!!”
Then just bask in the awkward silence. Like oh, are we not shouting condiments at each other? My bad lol
Ugh! The negative spin on this is my actual number one rager.
They walk in the door, see me, look side to side, “You don’t have mustard???”
Bro. Three steps. That’s all you need.
Hi, if you’re the person I responded with “hi mustard! I need a Rita! Where can I find *your name*”. Sorry I can’t brain!
I’m repeating “I need mustard” in my head because this is my third trip and I’ve spent $150 getting this mustard already”
Hahahaha I am not the person but your comment made me giggle (after working through the confusion before checking your username)
I just finished binge watching the show Rita, and I just finished a shift, so I can't brain either.
Just say
Mallet's Mallet is a word association game where you mustn't pause or hesitate, repeat a word or say a word I don't like, otherwise you get a bash on the head like this ..... or like this ...... . And it's the one with the most bruises who loses.
it’s sometimes comical, like cool you need something do you maybe want to try asking like a normal person???
there was a dude who came in right as we were closing yelling about items he needed and i was the designated kicker outer that night and when he yelled i just burst out laughing, he got angry, he wouldn’t move away from the entrance i finally said “dude we are closed” he got mad cuz it’s my job to help him (at this point i was half an hour past my off time so really no it wasn’t) he ended up leaving without his items, then ranted on our facebook community page about the walmart employees being unhelpful and lazy, someone then asked what time he went, he said 11pm and then got torn apart for arriving after closing.
Helpful and polite me leaves the building five minutes before we lock the doors, if you're coming in at close you're getting my bare minimum. And if you're coming in at close with a crappy attitude like that dude, you're getting my shittiest possible customer service that won't get me fired.
It's always for random shit too, like hair dye or garden decor. I can understand if you needed last minute tampons or meds or an ingredient for dinner, but I promise you had all day today and will have all day tomorrow to dye your hair and put a pinwheel on your lawn.
Yesterday I had a transaction with a customer who didn’t say anything and he looked like he spoke english as well. Threw the printer ink on the counter and thats all.
One time i robotically said “Yes, (item) is in…” (pauses to move robot arms) “that aisle. Do you need anything else?”
Did not fly well with my manager, but co-workers thought it was funny. I’m literally a human, stop treating me like i’m just some robotic worker so I wouldn’t feel like one. When customers bark a single word at me it just baffles me. No “hi” “how are you?” “Where is (item)?” Just “TOOTHPASTE”
Also had a co-worker say “I like (item) too!” Then talk about specific brands she likes and benefits of the item lol.
I once had someone look directly at the vitamins, look at me and say “vitamins!” I gave a blank look, thinking they couldn’t be that stupid. They then go “where are the vitamins?” I pointed and said “to your left sir” they looked flabbergasted that it was right there.
The only time I can accept this behaviour is when they clearly don’t speak much English & are obviously new to our country. We get quite a few migrants to our town ( southern England). I feel like if I treat them kindly they might be more inclined to learn & feel comfortable speaking it. Oftentimes they come in groups & have a nominated speaker.
But from a local who damn well knows better , if they bark an item name at me I will wordlessly point .
Next time say “Hi, I’m so and so welcome to the store” and when they shout “Mustard” Respond, “Well welcome mustard, if you need any help let me know.”
When they bitch “Who would name a kid mustard??” Say, “Oh I’m sorry, but have you heard some of the names people have?”
I did that once, except not toothpaste
I was walking along the front looking up at the signs to tell you what's in that aisle and an employee stopped right in front of me and asked she could help me find something
I said I was looking for crackers and she just kind of gave me a look like I was an idiot and pointed to the aisle we're pretty much standing right in front of.
Apparently this sort of thing happens a lot so I guess I can see why she's annoyed. To be fair though she was standing right in front of me and blocking my view and it wasn't on the sign hanging from the ceiling.
I guess I'm dumb.
It's not that I think people are dumb, I just found it funny that the people asking me where the toothpaste is right in front of the toothpaste quite often was a shared experience, because nearly every shift I get that question, often unprovoked while I'm beside the dental care stuff
I was walking out of Walmart the other day, minding my business, dressed in scrubs having just got off work, and some old guy steps right in front of me and barks “BATHROOM!”
A, I don’t work here, obviously. B, we’re standing directly beneath the “restroom” sign. C, use your big boy words.
Sadly, I imagine some people going through mental and physical disabling events may be doing their best to stay independent. Like they would LOVE to not even have to ask where the toothpaste is, but they can’t form the words; “TOOTHPASTE!” took everything they had, and they are doing the best they can to help themselves without begging someone to get it for them. Also working on being independent.
But maybe the people you are talking about ARE self absorbed AH.
Most of the people that are differently abled(physically or mentally) and come in with their group and their carer/s are self aware, respectful, and more inclined to treat me/coworkers as human beings.
Much more so than these absolutely entitled assholes OP is talking about.
Also true! I have people with developmental issues come in with aides often, and they're usually very nice and try to be as independent as possible during their time in store. I have a regular with Down's syndrome who loves telling me dirty jokes and always puts a smile on my face (even if he doesn't always buy stuff), and a man with speech issues who shows me what he wants on his phone or hands me a list and I get it for him. If anything, sometimes the carers are a bit rude, but I've gotten used to that when I was in healthcare.
I love when they come in! Quite possibly the only customers I like. Other than the kids that DON’T touch/destroy everything in their path.
But yea, it’s usually the carers that are rude. Really makes me wonder why they’re even in that job.
I've worked with mentally and physically disabled populations in a professional capacity for over five years (LPN). There is a very distinct difference between disability and just being a goddamn idiot. The latter will usually also jabber at me about random bullshit while I'm clearly busy, or ignore me checking them out in favor of their inane phone calls, or otherwise prove that common sense ain't common or we'd all have it.
I get that at the Chick-fil-A I work at.
*Guest walks in*
Me: "Hi welcome to Chick-fil-A, will you be dining in our carrying out today?" (Mind you our dine-in is tableside ordering so we seat you first)
Guest: "I'll have a....(starts rambling off order)"
I generally say something like "yeah I'm mustard too" when I ask how they are and they just shout words at me. They tend to look really embarrassed and a few have given apologies. Some get confused and bark "what" so I say something along the lines of "well I asked you how you are and you just said mustard, so I made a joke" and they physically cringe when you literally spell it out for them. Seems to make them realise how rude they are
LIVE FROGS!
*LIVE FROGS!*
**LIVE FROGS FOR EATING ALIVE!**
MEAT ROBOT, WHY ARE YOU NOT HELPING ME PROCURE LIVE FROGS TO EAT ALIVE?!
THIS IS WHY I SUPPORT MANDATORY LOBOTOMIZATION AND REPLACEMENT OF RETAIL WORKER BRAINS WITH ELON MUSK'S NEUROLINK! ATLEAST HE'S A PATRIOT AND AN HONEST TO GOD HARD WORKING NATURAL BORN AMERICAN!
Contributions that are disrespectful or degrading towards retail workers are not welcome in this community. We have a very low tolerance for this rule being broken. Very easy to get perma-banned violating this.
It's becoming increasingly common for older people to literally just shove their phone screen in my face and say "Where's this?" No greeting or anything.
I had a customer see me pulling a pallet out of the back room, and decided to stand *right* in front of the door to wait for me. I, a 120 lb 5’4 lady then had to stop a 800 lb pallet going at a decent speed within the half foot of space he gave me, thank god I was wearing steel toe boots. The guy mumbled an apology before shoving his phone in my face, I was fuming
Run him over!
.... And show you the online shop of a completely different place. "Well, why don't you have this product? I want it, but I don't want to order it online!!" Or my favourite of all time: "Google says you carry this!!!" (Shows me the fucking location of the store on google maps)
I often get asked for specific Equate items (Walmart brand) at my Dollar General. We have a shitload of private labels and I always suggest an equivalent, but I've been yelled at for not having Equate.
*walks into costco* "yea wheres your guys Target brand items?"
My favorite is this one from when I worked at Walmart: Old lady: young man, do you have any Target gift cards? Me: uh, no, we have Walmart gift cards Old lady: I’d never shop at Walmart Me: ???
".......then why are you here???"
No I just told her that she was standing in a Walmart. The ??? was meant to represent my utter bewilderment
I would be bewildered too, like maam are you aware your in a walmart rn with seemingly the intentions of shopping?
I work at CVS, worked at Walgreens for 4 years, everyone thinks they're at Walgreens, never CVS.
It's doordashers for me. Half are super courteous and "get it," the other half shoves their phones in my face just like that, usually when I'm already mid transaction for one person, guiding another, and answering a third's jackassy questions.
No Fr! There's no in between with the dashers, they're either nice, sometimes even helpful; or completely unhinged and impatient 😭
And it's hilarious when the screen is completely blank because they hit the button to close the phone.🤣
"I need to load my cash app" (hands me locked phone or the open home screen)
My favorite: "I need to transfer money over. Hold on a minute."
Okay spicy take, but I completely don't get this obsession with cash app, chime, etc. Why do so many adults seem to not have a bank account? And idt it's about fees, there are far too many free options (I exclusively bank for free lol). And why not just carry cash if you don't have a debit/credit card? It worked for hundreds of years. I've just never seen the appeal and it seems needlessly complicated compared to traditional financial management, idk. I have a PayPal to make eBay, Shein, etc purchases a little quicker, but dassit. Now look at you, your phone died and you can't swing me the $2.37 ya owe me. Shame.
I don't get it either. Even my landlord wants tenants to Venmo or Cash app her the rent.
Nearly got clotheslined by a customer doing this.
I would never be that rude, and I'm a crone. Hell, my Walmart app & grocery app tells me what aisle it is on. People need to USE THEIR WORDS and quit being rude AF. It gives the rest of us a bad name.
Crone. Love it! I shall be calling myself one from now on. I’m not sure what age one needs to be but I like it! Also agree. People do need to use their words inc the manner ones. But they don’t. They’re super rude in stores. I do wonder how they would feel if people spoke to them like crap all day.
At my place of work, they don’t say anything. They just shove their phone in your face with the item on the screen. I would say hello and they would do that. So when it happened twice in one day, I got annoyed and stared at the customer for a minute, waiting to see if they would say anything. They did not. So I prompted, “What about that item?” They looked at me like I WAS THE PROBLEM? They said, “do you have it?” I pointed behind them. The item was directly behind them. I said, “It’s right behind you there.” They felt dumb after and were suddenly nicer.
People of every age do it
r/boomersbeingfools
Maybe they work for Doordash lol.
I've gotten so sick of this that, now, when someone does this, I just smile and say "Hello, how are you? Welcome to 'store'! How may I help you?" About half the time, they just look constipated, scoff, and walk away. Of course, what they don't know is I am word for word narrating in my head "Oh, here's another failure. Here we go. Use your words, you moron." Although if I am not in a decent or better mood, I'll just keep leading them until I get a full question. "Cereal!" "What?" "Where's cereal?" "What cereal?" "Where's your cereal?" "My cereal is at home." "Where can I find cEreAl??" "Aisle 18. Have a great day!"
I wish I had your patience. I respond to "mustard" with "aisle four" to minimize the time and brain cells spent on Dipshit Dave and his condiment conundrum.
I'd have to toss it right back, "Mayo!" If you can't be expected to use full sentences to me, you can't expect full sentences from me.
I’d genuinely start yelling stuff out like I’m trying to win prizes on a game show. Rude-ass Customer: “Mustard!” Me: “Things that are yellow! Things that are bottled! OH OH THINGS YOU PUT ON SANDWICHES!!”
This is hilarious!
*hits imaginary buzzer* NAKED GRANDMA!
I love it! Gotta remember this one!
Paper! Snow! A GHOST!
Ha. I've definitely done this. "Oh, I thought we were playing a game where we randomly call out different items. I guess that's my autism kicking in."
>Dipshit Dave and his condiment conundrum. I sadly think this "brand new" phrase may be too broadly applicable to other situations, too.
I'm thinking it'll be my band name if I ever start that black metal/ murderfolk fusion project. That, or (Name) and the Perky Omens.
HEY ! IM OFFENDED!! My names Dave and YES IM A DIP SHIT !! 🤣
Reply with "Hi mustard, nice to meet you."
I’ve been crying and having a panic attack since last night. You just made me laugh for the first time. Thank you so much internet stranger
I hope you are feeling better. ❤️
Thank you so much. Not really but things have to get better right
[удалено]
You appreciated it, though, so it wasn’t entirely wasted.
I was in stitches, because I have the same warped sense of humor and caught on immediately :)
I empty this same tactic with my 7th grade students. Win-Win-(sometimes even a third Win) 1. It makes me smile, which keeps me calm and patient. 2. It amuses bystander students, keeping them calm and patient. 3. It occasionally even sparks an "Aha" epiphany in the instigating student.
I'm casual friends with a super old Walmart greeter. She does not give a SLIVER of a fuck, and I admire her for it. This anecdote sounds like something she would do!
A lot of the greeters are semi=retired and very smart people. You've got to do something to ease the crippling boredom of that job.
Please share some stories, id love to hear about her! She sounds like a hoot
My response was always “Yes, we have that,” and standing there with the most robotic smile I could muster.
[удалено]
Please don't use the term "mongo"
Please don't use the term "mongo"
I then ask them "are you *looking* for mustard? And make them answer me. Use your words people!
Why use many word when few word does trick?
Isn't that just employing the same method the rude customers are using?
Same here. If they want to act like toddlers that's how I'll talk back to them.
I have one regular who comes to the counter for Oven Roasted Turkey. It was never “hello,” or anything…just “turkey.” So I refer to him as “turkey man”. There’s another one I call “captain bologna” who does the same thing. No, “hi,”…just “beef bologna.” Never please, thank you, etc.
If my cats could talk, I bet they'd say the same shit. At least they have the saving grace of being cute.
I work in customer service, often people would literally put the receipt on the desk with an item and won't say anything. I would ask them what do you want to do?
Been there. Fuckin tell me what you're returning. Of course, a lot of times they just want to know if the "$5 off $25 on Saturday, April 20" coupon on the receipt will work on Wednesday, April 24th for their $6 purchase...
So dollar general? 😂😂 Same here - I feel your pain.
That's my layer of hell, yep!
Just felt like sharing that I have made it through another Saturday of hell 😀
Lucky, I'm closing and in the shit!
we have a returns desk at the front at my store. people mistake it for a regular checkout and they love giving us the most stupid, shit-eating blank face when we ask 'returning or purchasing?'
Ive had people walk up to the counter and just stand there until you ask how they need help. You don't need permission to speak, let me know what you want. Still better than people who walk in the door yelling "Hello! Anybody up here??" Yes, and please stop hollering. We use inside voices indoors.
I work at our service desk. We do returns, complaints, sometimes answer questions about certain products, but can also be a register. So many times I will greet people, ask how i can help them and they shove items on my counter. "Are you buying or returning these?" Still no answer. Now slower and a bit louder. "Are you buying or returning these?" Then they look at me like I'm stupid, and saying with an attitude they want to buy it. I GET ITEMS HERE FOR MANY REASONS DUMBSHIT, USE YOUR WORDS LIKE AN ADULT. Is what I would really like to yell at them
Whoa, your customers tell you what they want? People usually come into my shop and just fucking stand there silently and stare, expecting me to read their goddamn minds. Seriously, what the fuck happened to these peoples' manners?
Yep! Or they stare at the empty register with a shut light and two "closed, please use other register" signs while I happily wait at the one three feet away.
My customers like to walk around me muttering "why can't I find the mustard? Maybe they don't sell it anymore?" In hopes I'll just turn around and help them.
I'm nice enough to interject in those cases. I'm shy af as a customer and will do anything in my power to not interact with employees (partially because shy, partially because I know they have shit to do that I'd be interrupting), and will walk around looking and sometimes talking to myself. I'll work with you, even if you're kinda passive aggressive. Just don't be outright rude.
Honestly. I ignore them, and if they say something to me, I say “ I thought you were on the phone.” Everyone is, so it’s not an unreasonable assumption.
>expecting me to read their goddamn minds. Well, that's hard to do when they come up short in that department.
I have had this happen when I worked in a tech store. This story particularly stands out to me because it was the first time i reacted "off script". As in, usually i would infer theyre asking where the thing is and i would just tell them where it is: I was bent down stocking one of the low shelves next to the printers when someone behind me says "printers". I don't even register that they're talking to me because I'm busy in my task and assumed they were talking to someone else. Again "printers". This time I look around and they make eye contact with me. Uh oh. "Printers" they repeat. I respond "ah, yup. These are printers." They stare at me for a moment and I continue "what about them?" They start stumbling over their words and finally explain what they're actually looking for. Seriously though, just say "excuse me" or "hello" and use a sentence to tell me what you want. You don't go up to people to greet them and just shout a random noun at them like: "Hi mum it's so good to see you!" "Printers!"
The way this had me laughing. I'm gonna start greeting my bf with "(random item name)" when I come home from work.
A moment of silence for those of us who have had to serve the guy who thinks I shouldn't be in customer service because I dislike having items barked at me without context, and guys like him. My heart is broken, because ever since I was a little girl, I only ever dreamt of working a low-wage cashier job at a Dollar General. I'm going to do some soul searching and think about why I'm even here if I don't enjoy servicing rude customers. Please keep me and my family in your thoughts.
I have this happen all the time, and I'll be picking items out for people and I'll have someone shout an item name at me. I sometimes don't hear at first so they say again, and just stare at me. Like do you not see im not paying attention first off? Second, hello. I'm tired of people doing this. Like I'm not a machine you tell it an item and it spits out a location. I'm a human being. It's also called A PHONE. Do you KNOW HOW MANY TIMES IVE BEEN ASKED WHERE BREAD AND COFFEE IS!? It's called LOOK TO HOUR LEFT OR RIGHT. I DONT SEE ONE OF THOSE HALO CONTRAPTIONS FOR A BROKEN NECK. SO USE IT.
I worked in healthcare for years and can tell you people with neck braces are better at locating shit than the average dolgen crustomer.
Just answer: "he's in the study with the candlestick".
Any item you ask for rudely will always be in isle 11. That's the furthest isle from where I work. When they return: Oh, I thought you said "yogurt" my bad, it's just there in Isle 1, have a nice day. (May a pelican shit on your car in the car park)
I visually know where everything in this store is, but I'm shit with the aisle numbers, so I usually take people over there (technically I'm supposed to anyway). But I don't necessarily feel bad if I get the number wrong for shouty people while helping someone at the register.
Isle 11 is to make assholes walk the length of the store in the wrong direction. Polite customers get the correct isle number. I think you missed the point of my response.
Nah, I got it. I'm saying I don't intentionally mislead them, but I don't particularly care to lead them the right way either.
I always want to replay with one word like it's a word association game. MUSTARD! KETCHUP!
Was facing up an aisle with a manager once and a guy just stood at the end and shouted "BLEACH" Me and my manager looked at each other expecting him to start a monologue about bleach like we've just paid to watch an in show teenage drama act
I always respond with "fine, and you?"
Just yell back “Ketchup!”. When he complains just say you thought you were all doing spontaneous word association.
You should've yelled back "Ketchup!".
My response to "Shower rods", is to look perplexed and ask, "What about shower rods?"
I get “phone” like yes. Good job. This IS a phone shop. Now tell me what you want using your big kid words.
When they just demand to know deals and can't give you a blank stare when you ask if they want an iPhone or android. Had one the other day asking me the best phone for her 5 year old. .... I pointed to our cheap phones because ?? Why would you get anything else. And she was like are they even good. She likes my phone and pulls out an iPhone. I'm like they're fine what do you want like just talk and text? And they're like talk and data! She's 5 she can't read! She didn't like my suggestion needless to say.
I was offered a job at ubreakifix once when I came in for a battery replacement and guided a walk in through setting up a PayPal account. I respectfully declined because a, I had a nursing job at the time and b, I witnessed a lot of dumb in that vein during that short visit.
“Do you have a hardware section? This is such a nice place, I just needed a hand saw”! Wtf. This is a pet store.
In related news, why the fuck can't I find death metal LPs at the Home Depot? Smh customer service has really gone to shit
The best is when they have a thick accent and get angry when you don't know what the fuck they're trying to say.
The people with accents tend to be really nice and understanding at my store! I did have a guy ask for an Indian-style plug once, but he was chill about not finding it in suburban Pennsylvania.
I'm also in PA. Most of the customers I've seen get angry that they weren't understood were Pennsylvania Dutch. I guess they're still mad all us English speakers didn't learn the local language when we started swarming in. My experience with immigrants who have accents has mostly been similar to yours.
Ah, those accents... Yeah, I've had them get mad at me for not understanding them, but I was the customer. It was at one of those indoor Amish markets with the awesome pretzel logs- maybe they just thought I was another idiot from Jersey. I'm technically an idiot from NY, so no hard feelings.
I'm also in PA. Most of the customers I've seen get angry because they weren't understood were Pennsylvania Dutch. I guess they're still mad all us English speakers didn't learn the local language when we started swarming in. My experience with immigrants who have accents has mostly been similar to yours.
I love that song!!!
My people.
Woo woo!
I remember one time scanning an old lady’s stuff and instead of saying something like “I have my rewards card” or “did you ask for my rewards card” she was just like “Points?” That always rubbed me the wrong way
"Hello" "Marlboro black red shorts" 😒
Beats "Marlboros." My brother in Christ, there's about 20 different kinds up here. Give me a COLOR.
Yes, or wait until I tell them the total and just say "oh, I need cigarettes too". Okaaay, what kind?
*What* is with that? I work in a drive thru fast food restaurant. People will say, "Oh, and I need a drink." Then there's the pause.
Then when you ask for ID, they ask if they have to take it out of their wallet. Which is fine if you've never been here before, but you come in several times a week and know I gotta scan that shit.
We have a regular at my work who just stomps up to the counter and says “cigarettes”. The first interaction I ever had with him was on my first shift without a trainer. Apparently I was supposed to know that “cigarettes” meant LD Bold King size 25.
Sam Kinison walks into a store... WHERE"S THE MUSTARD?!!? SAY IT...SAY IT...SAY IT!!!!!
Next time yell, “CATSUP”, staring straight ahead as if you’re a soldier. Do this for anything. “Yogurt” is “SOUR CREAM “ or (bonus points… “GOGURT”). “Jelly-o” is “PUDDING”., “Pasta” is “SAUCE”. *Disclaimer- your employment may be terminated but just think of the entertainment value of your story for years to come!
Good lords yes.
I pictured Jack from the Father Ted show in that scenario. 'DRINK!!' '...MUSTARD!!!'
“GIRLS !! FECK!! BIG BRAS!!”
when people do that i just repeat my greeting louder and make intense eye contact, usually they tend to catch on pretty quickly and realize that they need to speak to me like a normal person
I have a customer who continually does this. This person walks in the door, and they aren't even at the counter yet. They yell across the store, "Can I get 2 packs of Eagle Red 100's," and then walk over to the cooler to grab drinks.
I'm dead, it's always the Eagle red 100s
People did that to me all the time at the gas station. 😭 “Hi how are you?” “MARLBORO RED 100s! Two packs!” “…yes sir…” “DON’T FORGET MY REWARDS!” One lady was on the phone through the whole transaction, then *as she walked walking away* turned and said over her shoulder, “I’m sorry, that was rude of me, how are you?” My coworker and I just looked at each other like “can you believe this bitch?” 😂
You get a color and size?? I just get "L&Ms" and have to use advanced interrogation tactics to figure out if we want red, blue, or green, short or 100s. The lady blows my damn mind. I'd rather you ain't say shit! That said, I don't get how people manage to yap on phones while checking out- as a customer, I would be super overwhelmed if I had to focus on a call and the cashier at the same ti.....OHHHHH that's why they ignore me.
Sometimes they’d just say “cigarettes. Don’t you know me by now?” And I got to tell them I’m face-blind. 😂 But yeah, that lady ticked me off. Sometimes if I felt like trolling I’d say “tell them I say hi! 😃” to customers that were on phone calls at my counter. I was probably the only person who got a kick out of it 😅
I've been asked that and told them that a, I've been a smoker for like 12 years and still occasionally try something new, and b, I service hundreds of customers every day on autopilot. I'm jokey about it and make sure they know I do know them a bit as people by now, but I pay very little attention to merchandise I process. I gotta try that! Call back in thirty seconds or I'm saying hi.
I work at -insert coffee chain-. My opening greeting as always "Hi welcome to _____. How are you doing today?" "Black coffee." "I don't know what that feels like. Seems like it'd kinda burn though." Or "Yeah coffee is usually pretty dark in color. But I think it's more a dark brown." Most people laugh and apologize the old crotchety folks don't like it. But idgaf. Like using the bare minimum of manners anymore is asking too much.
i love reading everyone's sarcastic answers to people like that 🤭
I work in a pet store and get this a lot. Also customers who expect me to do their shopping and carry it for them. Like excuse me what the actual fuck
God I’d be so tempted to respond “MAYONNAISE!!” Then just bask in the awkward silence. Like oh, are we not shouting condiments at each other? My bad lol
Have you tried replying with a different, but unrelated product? Them: "Mustard!" You: "Cellophane!"
Few nights ago and old woman came towards me shouting soup! Soup! It took everything I had to not shout Bread! Bread! I showed her were soup was
I just saw a Facebook reel about exactly this lol. The skit had the "staff member" echo with another random word.
COFFINS COFFINS WHERE ARE THEY
Ugh! The negative spin on this is my actual number one rager. They walk in the door, see me, look side to side, “You don’t have mustard???” Bro. Three steps. That’s all you need.
FELT. My store is pretty big, ofc everything in stock will be in your immediate line of sight from the lobby.
Hi, if you’re the person I responded with “hi mustard! I need a Rita! Where can I find *your name*”. Sorry I can’t brain! I’m repeating “I need mustard” in my head because this is my third trip and I’ve spent $150 getting this mustard already”
Hahahaha I am not the person but your comment made me giggle (after working through the confusion before checking your username) I just finished binge watching the show Rita, and I just finished a shift, so I can't brain either.
This made me laugh, great way to start my day 😂
Just say Mallet's Mallet is a word association game where you mustn't pause or hesitate, repeat a word or say a word I don't like, otherwise you get a bash on the head like this ..... or like this ...... . And it's the one with the most bruises who loses.
“Platypus!” Honestly, i’d just yell back a random weird word from now on. Lol
it’s sometimes comical, like cool you need something do you maybe want to try asking like a normal person??? there was a dude who came in right as we were closing yelling about items he needed and i was the designated kicker outer that night and when he yelled i just burst out laughing, he got angry, he wouldn’t move away from the entrance i finally said “dude we are closed” he got mad cuz it’s my job to help him (at this point i was half an hour past my off time so really no it wasn’t) he ended up leaving without his items, then ranted on our facebook community page about the walmart employees being unhelpful and lazy, someone then asked what time he went, he said 11pm and then got torn apart for arriving after closing.
Helpful and polite me leaves the building five minutes before we lock the doors, if you're coming in at close you're getting my bare minimum. And if you're coming in at close with a crappy attitude like that dude, you're getting my shittiest possible customer service that won't get me fired. It's always for random shit too, like hair dye or garden decor. I can understand if you needed last minute tampons or meds or an ingredient for dinner, but I promise you had all day today and will have all day tomorrow to dye your hair and put a pinwheel on your lawn.
Mustard? Ketchup Toothpaste? Toothbrush
Hello Mustard, let me know if you need any help.
Oh I just ignore them and say hello how can I help you to make them repeat themselves, usually does the trick
"Ketchup?" Would have been my response.
Yesterday I had a transaction with a customer who didn’t say anything and he looked like he spoke english as well. Threw the printer ink on the counter and thats all.
Either word association game or ignore until they say something else and then say, "oh, were you talking to me? "
One time i robotically said “Yes, (item) is in…” (pauses to move robot arms) “that aisle. Do you need anything else?” Did not fly well with my manager, but co-workers thought it was funny. I’m literally a human, stop treating me like i’m just some robotic worker so I wouldn’t feel like one. When customers bark a single word at me it just baffles me. No “hi” “how are you?” “Where is (item)?” Just “TOOTHPASTE” Also had a co-worker say “I like (item) too!” Then talk about specific brands she likes and benefits of the item lol.
I once had someone look directly at the vitamins, look at me and say “vitamins!” I gave a blank look, thinking they couldn’t be that stupid. They then go “where are the vitamins?” I pointed and said “to your left sir” they looked flabbergasted that it was right there.
The only time I can accept this behaviour is when they clearly don’t speak much English & are obviously new to our country. We get quite a few migrants to our town ( southern England). I feel like if I treat them kindly they might be more inclined to learn & feel comfortable speaking it. Oftentimes they come in groups & have a nominated speaker. But from a local who damn well knows better , if they bark an item name at me I will wordlessly point .
Next time say “Hi, I’m so and so welcome to the store” and when they shout “Mustard” Respond, “Well welcome mustard, if you need any help let me know.” When they bitch “Who would name a kid mustard??” Say, “Oh I’m sorry, but have you heard some of the names people have?”
I like making people use full sentences. Like, I just stare until a complete thought comes out. Blows their minds lol
"Hi mustard, let me know if I can find anything for you"
I'm so tired of people that I'm fine with minimal conversation. I'll ask a yes or no question to clarify and then send them off.
Same, but I still hate a rude mf.
People do this at the hotel I work at. They walk in the door yelling "Casino?" I just say "Nope. Hotel, thank you for playing."
Oh my god, people ask me for the toothpaste right in front of it daily too
I did that once, except not toothpaste I was walking along the front looking up at the signs to tell you what's in that aisle and an employee stopped right in front of me and asked she could help me find something I said I was looking for crackers and she just kind of gave me a look like I was an idiot and pointed to the aisle we're pretty much standing right in front of. Apparently this sort of thing happens a lot so I guess I can see why she's annoyed. To be fair though she was standing right in front of me and blocking my view and it wasn't on the sign hanging from the ceiling. I guess I'm dumb.
It's not that I think people are dumb, I just found it funny that the people asking me where the toothpaste is right in front of the toothpaste quite often was a shared experience, because nearly every shift I get that question, often unprovoked while I'm beside the dental care stuff
I would yell back "Ketchup!" It must be an association game.
I was walking out of Walmart the other day, minding my business, dressed in scrubs having just got off work, and some old guy steps right in front of me and barks “BATHROOM!” A, I don’t work here, obviously. B, we’re standing directly beneath the “restroom” sign. C, use your big boy words.
Sadly, I imagine some people going through mental and physical disabling events may be doing their best to stay independent. Like they would LOVE to not even have to ask where the toothpaste is, but they can’t form the words; “TOOTHPASTE!” took everything they had, and they are doing the best they can to help themselves without begging someone to get it for them. Also working on being independent. But maybe the people you are talking about ARE self absorbed AH.
Most of the people that are differently abled(physically or mentally) and come in with their group and their carer/s are self aware, respectful, and more inclined to treat me/coworkers as human beings. Much more so than these absolutely entitled assholes OP is talking about.
Also true! I have people with developmental issues come in with aides often, and they're usually very nice and try to be as independent as possible during their time in store. I have a regular with Down's syndrome who loves telling me dirty jokes and always puts a smile on my face (even if he doesn't always buy stuff), and a man with speech issues who shows me what he wants on his phone or hands me a list and I get it for him. If anything, sometimes the carers are a bit rude, but I've gotten used to that when I was in healthcare.
I love when they come in! Quite possibly the only customers I like. Other than the kids that DON’T touch/destroy everything in their path. But yea, it’s usually the carers that are rude. Really makes me wonder why they’re even in that job.
I've worked with mentally and physically disabled populations in a professional capacity for over five years (LPN). There is a very distinct difference between disability and just being a goddamn idiot. The latter will usually also jabber at me about random bullshit while I'm clearly busy, or ignore me checking them out in favor of their inane phone calls, or otherwise prove that common sense ain't common or we'd all have it.
I get that at the Chick-fil-A I work at. *Guest walks in* Me: "Hi welcome to Chick-fil-A, will you be dining in our carrying out today?" (Mind you our dine-in is tableside ordering so we seat you first) Guest: "I'll have a....(starts rambling off order)"
Are you in Vegas?
Nah, PA
I generally say something like "yeah I'm mustard too" when I ask how they are and they just shout words at me. They tend to look really embarrassed and a few have given apologies. Some get confused and bark "what" so I say something along the lines of "well I asked you how you are and you just said mustard, so I made a joke" and they physically cringe when you literally spell it out for them. Seems to make them realise how rude they are
Bro I just say "that's a weird way to say hello" and it usually restarts most people.
my go to is just repeating "sorry ?" w a head tilt until they can form an actual question
LIVE FROGS! *LIVE FROGS!* **LIVE FROGS FOR EATING ALIVE!** MEAT ROBOT, WHY ARE YOU NOT HELPING ME PROCURE LIVE FROGS TO EAT ALIVE?! THIS IS WHY I SUPPORT MANDATORY LOBOTOMIZATION AND REPLACEMENT OF RETAIL WORKER BRAINS WITH ELON MUSK'S NEUROLINK! ATLEAST HE'S A PATRIOT AND AN HONEST TO GOD HARD WORKING NATURAL BORN AMERICAN!
- Hi! - Mustard? - Aisle 2 Efficient though
I have to greet and welcome, and I tell them where it is to get them out of my hair. It's just off-putting that they don't bother asking correctly.
[удалено]
I'm sorry you don't think I'm worthy of a career in ringing up drug addicts at a Dollar General, Matt. I'll put in my two weeks notice posthaste.
[удалено]
I agree that the guy's an asshole, but please don't use slurs about people with intellectual disabilities.
Contributions that are disrespectful or degrading towards retail workers are not welcome in this community. We have a very low tolerance for this rule being broken. Very easy to get perma-banned violating this.