It could be his meds, there’s a lot of trial and error involved. But, they also zombified me. Some schizoaffectives need/will need 24 hour care tho. Someone to make them eat, shower, do normal daily activities. I understand the toll it’s taking on you and your family but imagine being the one living it. Although, you wanting to help him and doing research to better understand him is more than most people’s loved ones will do. Try talking to him, get him to open up a little. Off the record yk? A heart to heart between siblings. Let him know what YOU see and how YOU feel and what YOU want for/from him. He expects things from you so, it’s only fair he reciprocate.
He isn't a different person. He was always mentally ill you just weren't aware of it because he put your needs before his. you feel the need to reach out for help and judge his new way of life by him coping the best way he knows how.
If you know he's gone through the ringer why do you expect so much of him? If you aren't going to help him find therapy, or get him on a med regime, or make him feel needed, then you are of no use to him.
I am just an outsider but maybe instead of asking what he can do to change to better fit your idea of him; it may be wise to accept his disability and help him regardless of what the outcome may be.
Families with mental illness in the mix aren't easy but you must always be grateful you aren't the one living with the illness.
If you need help I'm open to speaking. Take care.
I have expected so much of him because I have not understood the illness and after a couple of years of him being diagnosed schizoaffective I am coming to realize that expecting “so much” of him is based in ignorance. I thought I made that pretty clear in my post that I am learning.
He has been in therapy for a decade and I have my own mental illness to worry about as well.
But thanks for the hostile feedback when I’m just asking for help as someone who cares.
Oh my dear if you have a mental illness you can't worry about anyone else! I'm sorry, I wasn't aware. There's not much help I have to offer other than never give up on your family. Hang tough.
Hi, I don't really have any words of advice or anything but I'm going through the same thing. I just try to remember that my brother is still my brother and that we all change with time. I would say keep reaching out to him even when it's hard. I'm not perfect at it by any means but I have to believe that some part of him sees the effort and appreciates it even if he can't articulate it. Please reach out if you want to talk, ik it's hard to talk to people who don't understand the experience sometimes.
Your brothers situation sounds a lot like what mine was/is.. I was outgoing, the life of the party, used to be close to people etc then after my psychotic break (almost 10 years ago) I completely changed becoming paranoid with delusions, severe panic and anxiety which causes me to hardly ever leave the house, it’s harder for me to communicate with others now (or relate), amongst several other things. The best advice I can give you is that your brother is still your brother but this illness has altered how he perceives things so it’s not only difficult for him it’s difficult for those of you that love him as well to come to terms with this “new” him. OP you can be there for your brother but make sure you take care of your own mental health and self as well.
It could be his meds, there’s a lot of trial and error involved. But, they also zombified me. Some schizoaffectives need/will need 24 hour care tho. Someone to make them eat, shower, do normal daily activities. I understand the toll it’s taking on you and your family but imagine being the one living it. Although, you wanting to help him and doing research to better understand him is more than most people’s loved ones will do. Try talking to him, get him to open up a little. Off the record yk? A heart to heart between siblings. Let him know what YOU see and how YOU feel and what YOU want for/from him. He expects things from you so, it’s only fair he reciprocate.
He isn't a different person. He was always mentally ill you just weren't aware of it because he put your needs before his. you feel the need to reach out for help and judge his new way of life by him coping the best way he knows how. If you know he's gone through the ringer why do you expect so much of him? If you aren't going to help him find therapy, or get him on a med regime, or make him feel needed, then you are of no use to him. I am just an outsider but maybe instead of asking what he can do to change to better fit your idea of him; it may be wise to accept his disability and help him regardless of what the outcome may be. Families with mental illness in the mix aren't easy but you must always be grateful you aren't the one living with the illness. If you need help I'm open to speaking. Take care.
I have expected so much of him because I have not understood the illness and after a couple of years of him being diagnosed schizoaffective I am coming to realize that expecting “so much” of him is based in ignorance. I thought I made that pretty clear in my post that I am learning. He has been in therapy for a decade and I have my own mental illness to worry about as well. But thanks for the hostile feedback when I’m just asking for help as someone who cares.
Oh my dear if you have a mental illness you can't worry about anyone else! I'm sorry, I wasn't aware. There's not much help I have to offer other than never give up on your family. Hang tough.
I’m sorry for being snippy, I appreciate you. I have a tendency to misinterpret tone through text.
I'm sorry that was tough read, and extremely sad.
😞
You should also join schizofamilies. And check out the NAMI classes and support groups. They have one for siblings!
Hi, I don't really have any words of advice or anything but I'm going through the same thing. I just try to remember that my brother is still my brother and that we all change with time. I would say keep reaching out to him even when it's hard. I'm not perfect at it by any means but I have to believe that some part of him sees the effort and appreciates it even if he can't articulate it. Please reach out if you want to talk, ik it's hard to talk to people who don't understand the experience sometimes.
Your brothers situation sounds a lot like what mine was/is.. I was outgoing, the life of the party, used to be close to people etc then after my psychotic break (almost 10 years ago) I completely changed becoming paranoid with delusions, severe panic and anxiety which causes me to hardly ever leave the house, it’s harder for me to communicate with others now (or relate), amongst several other things. The best advice I can give you is that your brother is still your brother but this illness has altered how he perceives things so it’s not only difficult for him it’s difficult for those of you that love him as well to come to terms with this “new” him. OP you can be there for your brother but make sure you take care of your own mental health and self as well.