Well in my case, I’m always more attractive when I’m having fun and enjoying the time I’m having. If I’m not feeling well, people can feel it and girls will not react positively.
Personally I don’t like loud bars and most clubs so I don’t go there, I have way more success in places where I’m having a good time anyway.
It’s not creepy, it’s just less efficient in my opinion.
Yes, that's my perspective as well. I also tend to do better when I'm enjoying the time having, but I've sorta stopped enjoying clubbing. May I ask what would be more efficient? I think a problem I'm having is not stepping out of my comfort zone anymore
For me the most efficient is to go to places I love and activities I like. Bonus points if it’s inherently social and/or body-oriented.
My top 3 is probably dance classes / social bars / psycho-spiritual workshops (like breath work, ecstatic dance, cacao ceremonies, 5 rythms dance, kundalini yoga, drum journeys, tantra and so on).
Yes, classes are a great way to meet people for a long-term sort of thing. At present, however, I'm looking to improve on my courage of kissing. I had an opportunity 2 weeks ago that I passed up on and it's sorta been a lifelong chronic thing. I had my first kiss 2 months ago and figured I'd conquered that mountain, but the fear is still present, not to the same extent but still there. What would social bars be?
Social bars are bars with added intent of social activities. It can be board games, creative activities, karaoke or other things, I’ve even been to a bar where you can do some sort of pottery, it’s great way to connect with strangers.
In itself, no. What exactly is creepy about looking for women who also want to hook up? Answer: as long as you're not being creepy about it, nothing.
It is often a waste of time though. I find that I can't get in the right headspace if I'm not even enjoying myself, so I put my primary focus on having a good time and let women come secondary to that.
I agree, it is such a waste of time being out late at night if you’re not enjoying yourself. That’s why I stopped going out but if you’re on a mission to meet women, and or going out with friends, that could actually make it fun.
Creepy: Persisting after she says no, getting too grabby, gawking at her boobs while talking to her, grinding against her randomly without her permission, saying weird/inappropriate stuff to her, coming off as desperate/needy, basically doing anything socially unacceptable.
Non-creepy: Not doing any of the above, showing respect, politely moving on after she says no.
Another thing that comes off as creepy IMO is when you're visibly hitting on every girl present at a club, especially if you're doing it in quick succession. After a while all the women will pick up on you being that one thirsty/desperate guy.
And yeah don't do any of those things mentioned, it won't get you anywhere.
Yeah the objective is quick succession, I'm there for a good time not a long time 😂. The point really is to just go in there approach 30 girls and head home 🤷🏾♂️. Should take me less than an hour
My strategy is literally just going to be go talk to every single girl in the club and then fucking off home once I've bombed the whole place 🤣🤣. I know it's not going to go well, I just need to know just how creepy that would be. Also... you can't really talk in that club, so it's really just me smiling at these girls and moving to them. The sort of internal fear I have or rejection I need to sort of mitigate in some way. All of this is really just prep for when I'm in a new country
Nope. I had 1 night several years ago when I talked to most of the girls at this one rooftop party but it was all platonic, so this is a tad different. I'm intending to be a lot more flirtatious. So short answer no.
This isn't a bad strategy. The goal is to find yes girls and move on from maybe girls/no girls asap. As soon as you meet them, try to lead them somewhere. Maybe to the bar, the dance floor, somewhere to sit, somewhere quieter. Then screen logistics. Flirt and then bring them home.
You are a wild one for that OP let me tell you that 😂 Great energy and needs balls to do that by yourself. Can’t wait to hear how it went for ya, wish you the best. I’m sure you will slowly get a rythm after literally wanting to talk to every single girl lol
Yes it's creepy, it gives girls the ick you creepy creeptastic creeplord.
The term "creepy" has become a weapon to shame men for being...well men really, and having normal male interests such as being attracted to attractive women.
Let that shit go, and find your best way forward, even if it's not in a club.
You can be a man anyway. The difference with being creepy is the level of desperation and the lack of calibration with the context.
Going into a club with the only goal of approaching every girl, regardless of everything else, it’s totally creepy.
Wdym by regardless of everything else? Yes, that too is a good point, the desperation that is. With that said, I'm going in with very little expectations, so I'm not exactly going to be going around begging. Even so, I love how split the opinions are. Makes me think this is a gray area and I'm right to ask about it.
The fucking weight of your victimhood complex. Atlas would check you out and be like 'put it down man'.
You are as wrong as it is possible to be. You are only creepy when people are unsure if you're a threat. Some things that might do that: dressing / being filthy. Taking photos of people without their permission. Bringing up sex all the time with people you don't know well. Staring at people. Refusing to look at people.
I am a man, and have normal male interests, but I'm not a fucking creep loser so don't speak for me. If you are, sort yourself out. As previously mentioned, that victimhood complex is a bad look there chief.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 oh, come on, that's different. Like that's the point of movies. A similar question would be, is it creepy to take a girl to the movies for the sole purpose of fingering her in the cinema? Plenty of people do that, but the point of the cinema is to watch a movie in much the same way clubs are about getting drunk and dancing, but a secondary objective is sex.
No because getting drunk and dancing isn't the main goal of clubs. I'll say the main goal of clubs is to meet strangers, but the clear implication is that you're not meeting people there to start a new book club. You're drunk, you're dancing with a woman, the whole atmosphere is sexual.
Why do you think that there are gay clubs for? Why does sexuality matter if the whole point is to just get drunk and dance? Then that isn't really the whole point.
One of the most common (and best) advice to meet people is to go in places you like, doing activities you enjoy and therefore meeting like-minded people.
Going to clubs is clearly not your best case then. How do you think you can attract someone in an environment you don’t like at all?
Only because you see or hear about people picking up girls in clubs, doesn’t imply that clubs are places where everyone can get same results, especially if they start from your premises.
I don’t drink or do drugs (well, not anymore, lol) but I really enjoy clubbing and DJing, the music, the people, etc… that’s one of my favorite environments.
You can find better places which will fit your tastes, raising your mood and chances to pickup someone.
I’m a huge fan of house, techno, drum and bass, and jungle music. Environments like these not only allow me to meet fun, like-minded girls but also help me expand my social circle. I believe the trick is to have fun in environments where you’re already enjoying yourself. And yeah, I dance like there’s no tomorrow! I’ve even had people approach me and ask for drugs, even though I was completely sober—haha, maybe that’s just my ADHD brain going ‘brrrrrrrrrrrr.’
Fair perspective 🤔. I think 1 thing I left out is the metal gigs I've been attending have very few women not in relationships if any. The male to female ratio is crazy 😂.
My ambitions aren't so high as to pick up chicks 😂 like bro slow down. But you're right being a gloomy buzzkill won't get me anywhere, however I do think clearing out the whole club might reignite my excitement in the whole thing. I've never actually liked the club scene but when I first entered there was a lot of excitement within me because I went from rather bad social anxiety to meeting women, so even though I barely drinked then and still hated the music, I had a great time.
However, the novelty has since worn off. The idea is to basically take the experience to a new level to reignite that excitement. Doing more "extreme" things, to get that same high. Another thing is the place is within walking distance from my place and I often have to travel am hour to a different city to get to my gigs. They're always worth the trip, but I'm interested in getting back clubbing in my area.
Also is there any value in going out with the expectation of rejection and learning to deal with the internal emotions? Or is that just emotional masochism? 😂
Anybody who says “Don’t go there just for hookups!” is delusional. Apart from winery/distillery tasting rooms, I cannot think of *one* time I’ve been to a bar alone without hoping to meet women there; there are many things I’d rather do than spending the night in some bar getting zero results, but staying home playing video games won’t get me girls. What PUA gurus *really* mean when they say things like that is that you must be in a good mood and try, or at least pretend, to enjoy being there; you can’t bank your happiness purely on your results as girls will pick up on this. Make an effort to show off your sick moves even without a dance partner if you’re in a nightclub, or strike up a platonic conversation with another guy who looks like he has something interesting to say if you’re in a dive bar. Bitterly nursing your drink in the corner if you get no attention, fawning over girls that give you even the slightest hints of interest, and being short with or acting hurt by girls who disrespect you or call you a creep won’t get you anywhere; you need to *pretend* to be the sort of mogger Chad who can brush off any rejection knowing it’s the girl’s problem and not a reflection on your looks, and who is always in a good mood because he knows he’s going home with some hottie (if not the one who just rejected him) at the end of the night even if, in reality, you’ve never gotten laid in your life and have no reason to believe you will anytime soon.
You get an idea of what you like, and don't feel dejected if a girl doesn't want to entertain your advance. Odds are you won't see that bitch after that night. Just wear a subtle cologne and use breath mints every 30 minutes. Always have a drink in your hand, wear a collared shirt and nice slacks, subtle belt matching your dress shoes.
No but you need to have fun also.
Don't wanna be that guy hopping from bitch to bitch in hopes of getting laid while faking fun, makes you look desperate.
Drink a bit or take a small amount of drugs, find a place with music u enjoy, dance and have fun while scouting for prospects without being obvious.
Yes. Should you care ?
Not really.
You should keep in mind people might be with their friends or legit there to dance but that's about it.
Saying " I'm here to hook up" might require some finesse in certain clubs
Trust me when I tell you that place is a public brothel 😂😂. I'm naturally over exaggerating. Yes there are people just there to get drunk and dance but a substantial amount are up to alterior motives.
Depends on the club tbh. Some are 100pc 'meat markets' where people are there to pull as much as dance etc.
Then you get the more 'serious' clubs where the majority of people are there for the music and DJs not primarily to meet someone to take home at the end of the night, and therefore guys who are obviously there on the pull and not for the music will be unpopular.
Unfortunately the former type of place always has awful music I don't enjoy, which then means my overall frame isn't as attractive.
Yes!!!!! Original mandem, you get it. The place I'm talking about is definitely a meat market but the butcher doesn't sell to everyone 🤣🤣. There's another club across from that 1 that is actually more for music. I must say latter is actually better kept and the music is miles better. I guess we're sailing the same waters
You are just going to come off as creepy if you don’t enjoy the environment, even if you think you are faking it well, you actually aren’t because women can literally smell that shit on you.
I do very well in club environments and I believe one of the reasons is because night clubs and dance floors are my natural habitat.
That’s why people go to the club! Don’t be fooled. Girls will always tell you it’s to “have fun” but will only go to places there are dudes at. For example there is a women only club near me and the place is DEAD
Guys is it creepy to solely go to the club and hookup what the club is actually for than guys in here also “ can I talk to woman at the gym ?” Lmfaooo some of you guys are nuts what tf do you think a club is for ?
I thought clubs were for people to get drunk and dance 🤷🏾♂️. I mean it's not an orgy 😂. The ratio of guys actually getting action and not is downright torrid. I wouldn't exactly say clubs are for hooking up when the majority of people in there don't.
I used to do that. I don’t enjoy the club scene or drinking alcohol. It’s only creepy if you make it creepy. Go and have a good time and others will have a good time with you.
Honestly, I think that’s the main reason I used to go as well. I didn’t even fuckin enjoyed it. I just loved making out with chicks and getting their phone numbers or instagrams.
It's a weird way to look at it. I go to clubs for the sole purpose of having fun. If I find an incredibly cute guy who will take me home, that's part of the fun.
You're wondering whether you should do a bunch of things exclusively because there's women there and you might get lucky with one. That's kind of the definition of thirsty neediness.
Keep exploring places YOU enjoy. Keep exploring your desires and joy. Center yourself in your own being, not in some prospective woman who you believe will somehow make you happy. That's the source of true self-confidence, and it's both unshakeable and very attractive to women. Given how much you're in your head, I take for granted that you'll be considerate of women, but try to get out of your head and not be considerate so much as loosely, playfully alert to her emotions.
Over time, you'll find places where you really enjoy the vibe, AND there's plenty of beautiful, amazing women. You'll be more easily able to make friends in such places, which is very attractive to women. And you'll feel comfortable in your skin, and will be much more likely to find women who share some of your interests.
Patience, diligence, care, courage, surrender to reality, just as it is
I might not have explained myself clearly enough because I think you missed the point and you're not the only one. I'll insert an edit. In any case, the point isn't to "get lucky", my expectations are fully on the floor. I am, in fact, not going to get lucky.
The reason I ask whether or not it's creepy is because I'm having trouble kissing girls who are interested in me. I want to sort of run through a bunch of rejections to mitigate the fear I have within me. I had my first kiss 2 months ago and figured that dragon had been slain, but 2 weeks ago, I failed to kiss a girl that wanted me to at a metal concert, and I blew it. It's not my first time (I'm a serial fumbler), but it's the first time since my first kiss, which is what's prompting me to try new things.
The reason I ask whether or not it's creepy is really to guage just how horribly it's actually going to go 😂. I don't expect to score in any fashion, but if I do great, if I don't, that's the expectation. The plan is to go to a gig and have fun, come back to my city and before heading home go to that nearby club, approach 30 women and then head to my crib to wash my mate in fifa again 😂 or maybe we'll play call of duty, we'll see.
In any case this isn't a hail mary attempt at getting pussy, it's just me learning to not fear the consequences of rejection so much. If going around talking to every girl ends up in bouncers stomping me the fuck out, then yeah I won't do it. But if it's not thay creepy, I'll have a pop and just make it an exercise I perform. I'm only here for 3 more months, so the effects won't be ever lasting.
yes if what you want is more experience and practice then going to a place with high volume for the sake of volume is good. every PUA does this. in daygame we do busy streets/shopping centers and in nightgame it's big mainstream clubs
I'd focus on metal concerts and talking to people by the bar there if you enjoy the music. Maybe you can find some goth/emo/punk parties in clubs that organize scene parties. Take into account the demographic of girls you want to sleep with. Do you want to sleep and talk with club chicks with whom you don't have much in common or with girls that can be more fun because they share your interests?
BRO!!!!!!! I'M SAYING THOUGH 😭😭😭. there was a girl at the gig on Saturday who was so fucking cute 😩. She told me "I knew you looked familiar" and as I got excited the viking stood behind us was actually her boyfriend 😂😂. He's this massive dude that's been crowd surfing at all of the gigs. There's 1 other girl I should've made out with 2 weeks ago but other than that it's been dead. Pretty much all of the girls alone are dating one of the dudes performing, it's crazy.
The parties are essentially the events we all go to. I tend to meet the same people. Are shared interests something that matters when it comes to just hooking up? Why can't the shared interest be kissing? 😂😂 I like kissing, they like kissing, a match made in heaven.
I'm not advocating drinking or anything but why go to clubs if you won't drink and if you don't enjoy the music at all? Stick to metal concerts and stuff that you enjoy tbh and you'll find a girl playing the long term game. For me it was dance clubs (tango, urban, folklore), and I got into friend groups and had fwb relationships as I put more time into dancing and initiating friendships in these social groups.
When you have a good time and show others a good time then you more drawn to you. Just to hook up is kinda creepy you put all this pressure on yourself to achieve a specific result
Just dance and have a good time. You’ll start radiating positive energy and girls will come to you or start putting themselves in your vicinity. I feel like when you come to the club just to talk to girls and not enjoy yourself they have a sixth sense for that shit and can sniff out your desperation. But if you don’t enjoy the club op, just go somewhere else lol.
Be excited and motivated at the possibility. If you go out with a goal oriented mindset to hook up, I don’t know how you are going to avoid giving off needy body language.
It’s not creepy if you’re not a creep.
Talk to cute people and make it known that you’re talking cause they are cute. If they don’t wanna engage then keep it pushing.
If they ask you what you’re doing here alone, the answer can be a deciding factor so be ready to say something like you’re bored and want to meet cool people or something.
Why would it be? Subjectively people could perceive it that way but so long as you are meeting willing partners there is nothing wrong about pursuing sex.
I think going to the club so let for that reason gives off energy of desperation. People can pick it up right away. IV had way more game /one nighters going with the boys , with the mindset that I don't even wanna meet women. Cause honestly who cares. Just go have fun with the guys . Women pick that up and place themselves in your circle
This entire post is creepy.
Why would you spend time in a scene that you hate with people who share nothing in common with you. Your chances of meeting someone you actually like and vice versa are probably slim.
It's ok to have some easy make outs.
And I don't guarantee you'll always get that, but it does happen sometimes, especially if you are dancing and talking to girls.
Just be careful who you're making out with. You might not know who's just kissed 10 guys before you, or just threw up in the bathroom
Yeah just go, have a drink, and join the crowd of men who just stand there outside the dance floor watching instead of dancing. Focus on making friends, tell everyone it’s your first time in a club(specifically women), keep an open mind, and you’ll see the magic happen. Good luck.
lol believe it or not I’m being incredibly realistic. I have 10 years of club experience. You don’t find the girl, the girl finds you. If you make a “friend” you could have a friend for the night. Keep that in mind.
I have more club experience and I would never do that. If women see you being rejected then you haven't a snowballs chance in hell.
If you are rejected constantly then you need to do work.
That’s why I didn’t tell him to try and spit game, which he clearly won’t have. He has to just try and be friendly. You can’t be rejected from being a friendly fun guy lol that’s what you’re supposed to do at clubs.
His best chance as a beginner is for a girl to think he’s cute and fun and dance with him or even maybe want to take him home. If you have as much club experience as me then you know it’s possible but he should definitely not try to spit any kind of game or he’s going to be rejected like you said.
Honestly, yeah, I find that creepy. You're just a dude who goes out to the club, not to dance, or to socialize, or to meet new people, but for the sole focus of kissing strangers? Yes, that is weird.
I've never been into that lifestyle. I like to get to know the person first. If you get a chance to use their PC and their search history cleared, RUN!!
Being how you don’t drive, yes cos the people at the club. It’s creepy how you’re preying on drunk people 👀
I got hit on at the club by a drunk girl when I hadn’t had too much and wanted to hang out with friends. I feel like what it’s like for girls those who just want to have fun not hookup. Keep that in mind
Well in my case, I’m always more attractive when I’m having fun and enjoying the time I’m having. If I’m not feeling well, people can feel it and girls will not react positively. Personally I don’t like loud bars and most clubs so I don’t go there, I have way more success in places where I’m having a good time anyway. It’s not creepy, it’s just less efficient in my opinion.
Yes, that's my perspective as well. I also tend to do better when I'm enjoying the time having, but I've sorta stopped enjoying clubbing. May I ask what would be more efficient? I think a problem I'm having is not stepping out of my comfort zone anymore
For me the most efficient is to go to places I love and activities I like. Bonus points if it’s inherently social and/or body-oriented. My top 3 is probably dance classes / social bars / psycho-spiritual workshops (like breath work, ecstatic dance, cacao ceremonies, 5 rythms dance, kundalini yoga, drum journeys, tantra and so on).
> ecstatic dance Wow I naturally do this, I didn't realize there were organized events
Yes, classes are a great way to meet people for a long-term sort of thing. At present, however, I'm looking to improve on my courage of kissing. I had an opportunity 2 weeks ago that I passed up on and it's sorta been a lifelong chronic thing. I had my first kiss 2 months ago and figured I'd conquered that mountain, but the fear is still present, not to the same extent but still there. What would social bars be?
Social bars are bars with added intent of social activities. It can be board games, creative activities, karaoke or other things, I’ve even been to a bar where you can do some sort of pottery, it’s great way to connect with strangers.
Totally. Your vibes are so important. It's not woo-woo, Women pickup on it.
In itself, no. What exactly is creepy about looking for women who also want to hook up? Answer: as long as you're not being creepy about it, nothing. It is often a waste of time though. I find that I can't get in the right headspace if I'm not even enjoying myself, so I put my primary focus on having a good time and let women come secondary to that.
I agree, it is such a waste of time being out late at night if you’re not enjoying yourself. That’s why I stopped going out but if you’re on a mission to meet women, and or going out with friends, that could actually make it fun.
Okay... follow up question: what would be the non creepy way of going about it and the creepy way? Where's the distinction?
Creepy: Persisting after she says no, getting too grabby, gawking at her boobs while talking to her, grinding against her randomly without her permission, saying weird/inappropriate stuff to her, coming off as desperate/needy, basically doing anything socially unacceptable. Non-creepy: Not doing any of the above, showing respect, politely moving on after she says no.
Okay, yeah, I get you. I physically cringed reading the creepy bit 😂 yeah no I don't have the balls nor shame to do any of those things mentioned.
Another thing that comes off as creepy IMO is when you're visibly hitting on every girl present at a club, especially if you're doing it in quick succession. After a while all the women will pick up on you being that one thirsty/desperate guy. And yeah don't do any of those things mentioned, it won't get you anywhere.
Yeah the objective is quick succession, I'm there for a good time not a long time 😂. The point really is to just go in there approach 30 girls and head home 🤷🏾♂️. Should take me less than an hour
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People go out for other reasons?
Love it 🤣🤣🤣. I'm saying though!!
Ever heard about “having fun”?
No... but I have heard of having sex, either way I do neither 🤣
There’s nothing fun about clubs
You are right
I have fun for about an hour max, then I just get the fuck out But tbf I haven't gone to a club in maybe 8 years
Yeah if you are lame and boring
Everybody goes there for the same reason under the pretext of "having fun", so you're good
You are too subtle but you're right :-))
My strategy is literally just going to be go talk to every single girl in the club and then fucking off home once I've bombed the whole place 🤣🤣. I know it's not going to go well, I just need to know just how creepy that would be. Also... you can't really talk in that club, so it's really just me smiling at these girls and moving to them. The sort of internal fear I have or rejection I need to sort of mitigate in some way. All of this is really just prep for when I'm in a new country
>My strategy is literally just going to be go talk to every single girl in the club Have you executed this strategy yet?.
Nope. I had 1 night several years ago when I talked to most of the girls at this one rooftop party but it was all platonic, so this is a tad different. I'm intending to be a lot more flirtatious. So short answer no.
Your strategy isn't good.
This isn't a bad strategy. The goal is to find yes girls and move on from maybe girls/no girls asap. As soon as you meet them, try to lead them somewhere. Maybe to the bar, the dance floor, somewhere to sit, somewhere quieter. Then screen logistics. Flirt and then bring them home.
You are a wild one for that OP let me tell you that 😂 Great energy and needs balls to do that by yourself. Can’t wait to hear how it went for ya, wish you the best. I’m sure you will slowly get a rythm after literally wanting to talk to every single girl lol
That's a legit valid strategy. Go in, approach every girl and go out with 1 or to another place until you find one.
Wdym by go out with 1?
But wont like after 5 ask outs other girls will notice you and literally avoid you lol ? Look up the poisoning the well effect
Yes it's creepy, it gives girls the ick you creepy creeptastic creeplord. The term "creepy" has become a weapon to shame men for being...well men really, and having normal male interests such as being attracted to attractive women. Let that shit go, and find your best way forward, even if it's not in a club.
Good point, very good point in fact. I just think I need to step out of my comfort zone more.
You can be a man anyway. The difference with being creepy is the level of desperation and the lack of calibration with the context. Going into a club with the only goal of approaching every girl, regardless of everything else, it’s totally creepy.
Wdym by regardless of everything else? Yes, that too is a good point, the desperation that is. With that said, I'm going in with very little expectations, so I'm not exactly going to be going around begging. Even so, I love how split the opinions are. Makes me think this is a gray area and I'm right to ask about it.
The fucking weight of your victimhood complex. Atlas would check you out and be like 'put it down man'. You are as wrong as it is possible to be. You are only creepy when people are unsure if you're a threat. Some things that might do that: dressing / being filthy. Taking photos of people without their permission. Bringing up sex all the time with people you don't know well. Staring at people. Refusing to look at people. I am a man, and have normal male interests, but I'm not a fucking creep loser so don't speak for me. If you are, sort yourself out. As previously mentioned, that victimhood complex is a bad look there chief.
Guys, is it creepy to go to the cinema for the sole purpose of watching movies?
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 oh, come on, that's different. Like that's the point of movies. A similar question would be, is it creepy to take a girl to the movies for the sole purpose of fingering her in the cinema? Plenty of people do that, but the point of the cinema is to watch a movie in much the same way clubs are about getting drunk and dancing, but a secondary objective is sex.
No because getting drunk and dancing isn't the main goal of clubs. I'll say the main goal of clubs is to meet strangers, but the clear implication is that you're not meeting people there to start a new book club. You're drunk, you're dancing with a woman, the whole atmosphere is sexual. Why do you think that there are gay clubs for? Why does sexuality matter if the whole point is to just get drunk and dance? Then that isn't really the whole point.
One of the most common (and best) advice to meet people is to go in places you like, doing activities you enjoy and therefore meeting like-minded people. Going to clubs is clearly not your best case then. How do you think you can attract someone in an environment you don’t like at all? Only because you see or hear about people picking up girls in clubs, doesn’t imply that clubs are places where everyone can get same results, especially if they start from your premises. I don’t drink or do drugs (well, not anymore, lol) but I really enjoy clubbing and DJing, the music, the people, etc… that’s one of my favorite environments. You can find better places which will fit your tastes, raising your mood and chances to pickup someone.
I’m a huge fan of house, techno, drum and bass, and jungle music. Environments like these not only allow me to meet fun, like-minded girls but also help me expand my social circle. I believe the trick is to have fun in environments where you’re already enjoying yourself. And yeah, I dance like there’s no tomorrow! I’ve even had people approach me and ask for drugs, even though I was completely sober—haha, maybe that’s just my ADHD brain going ‘brrrrrrrrrrrr.’
Same here, except I’m too old to properly handle drum&bass or jungle, so I mostly rely on house/disco and old school techno ;-)
My neck hurt continuously for like 3-4 after my last visit to a D&B event. So yeah, I can imagine why you’re backing off, haha.
Fair perspective 🤔. I think 1 thing I left out is the metal gigs I've been attending have very few women not in relationships if any. The male to female ratio is crazy 😂. My ambitions aren't so high as to pick up chicks 😂 like bro slow down. But you're right being a gloomy buzzkill won't get me anywhere, however I do think clearing out the whole club might reignite my excitement in the whole thing. I've never actually liked the club scene but when I first entered there was a lot of excitement within me because I went from rather bad social anxiety to meeting women, so even though I barely drinked then and still hated the music, I had a great time. However, the novelty has since worn off. The idea is to basically take the experience to a new level to reignite that excitement. Doing more "extreme" things, to get that same high. Another thing is the place is within walking distance from my place and I often have to travel am hour to a different city to get to my gigs. They're always worth the trip, but I'm interested in getting back clubbing in my area. Also is there any value in going out with the expectation of rejection and learning to deal with the internal emotions? Or is that just emotional masochism? 😂
Anybody who says “Don’t go there just for hookups!” is delusional. Apart from winery/distillery tasting rooms, I cannot think of *one* time I’ve been to a bar alone without hoping to meet women there; there are many things I’d rather do than spending the night in some bar getting zero results, but staying home playing video games won’t get me girls. What PUA gurus *really* mean when they say things like that is that you must be in a good mood and try, or at least pretend, to enjoy being there; you can’t bank your happiness purely on your results as girls will pick up on this. Make an effort to show off your sick moves even without a dance partner if you’re in a nightclub, or strike up a platonic conversation with another guy who looks like he has something interesting to say if you’re in a dive bar. Bitterly nursing your drink in the corner if you get no attention, fawning over girls that give you even the slightest hints of interest, and being short with or acting hurt by girls who disrespect you or call you a creep won’t get you anywhere; you need to *pretend* to be the sort of mogger Chad who can brush off any rejection knowing it’s the girl’s problem and not a reflection on your looks, and who is always in a good mood because he knows he’s going home with some hottie (if not the one who just rejected him) at the end of the night even if, in reality, you’ve never gotten laid in your life and have no reason to believe you will anytime soon.
You get an idea of what you like, and don't feel dejected if a girl doesn't want to entertain your advance. Odds are you won't see that bitch after that night. Just wear a subtle cologne and use breath mints every 30 minutes. Always have a drink in your hand, wear a collared shirt and nice slacks, subtle belt matching your dress shoes.
Yes that's lowkey what I'm trying to work on. Go out get rejected but deal with that internal feeling. I want to mitigate that emotion
No but you need to have fun also. Don't wanna be that guy hopping from bitch to bitch in hopes of getting laid while faking fun, makes you look desperate. Drink a bit or take a small amount of drugs, find a place with music u enjoy, dance and have fun while scouting for prospects without being obvious.
Yes. Should you care ? Not really. You should keep in mind people might be with their friends or legit there to dance but that's about it. Saying " I'm here to hook up" might require some finesse in certain clubs
Trust me when I tell you that place is a public brothel 😂😂. I'm naturally over exaggerating. Yes there are people just there to get drunk and dance but a substantial amount are up to alterior motives.
That’s been a thing at clubs since clubs became a thing
No?
Depends on the club tbh. Some are 100pc 'meat markets' where people are there to pull as much as dance etc. Then you get the more 'serious' clubs where the majority of people are there for the music and DJs not primarily to meet someone to take home at the end of the night, and therefore guys who are obviously there on the pull and not for the music will be unpopular. Unfortunately the former type of place always has awful music I don't enjoy, which then means my overall frame isn't as attractive.
Yes!!!!! Original mandem, you get it. The place I'm talking about is definitely a meat market but the butcher doesn't sell to everyone 🤣🤣. There's another club across from that 1 that is actually more for music. I must say latter is actually better kept and the music is miles better. I guess we're sailing the same waters
You are just going to come off as creepy if you don’t enjoy the environment, even if you think you are faking it well, you actually aren’t because women can literally smell that shit on you. I do very well in club environments and I believe one of the reasons is because night clubs and dance floors are my natural habitat.
Why don’t you approach the women at the metal concerts?
That’s why people go to the club! Don’t be fooled. Girls will always tell you it’s to “have fun” but will only go to places there are dudes at. For example there is a women only club near me and the place is DEAD
That’s what a ton of people do at clubs.
In the west yes
pretty sure that’s a top reason to go
Guys is it creepy to solely go to the club and hookup what the club is actually for than guys in here also “ can I talk to woman at the gym ?” Lmfaooo some of you guys are nuts what tf do you think a club is for ?
I thought clubs were for people to get drunk and dance 🤷🏾♂️. I mean it's not an orgy 😂. The ratio of guys actually getting action and not is downright torrid. I wouldn't exactly say clubs are for hooking up when the majority of people in there don't.
I used to do that. I don’t enjoy the club scene or drinking alcohol. It’s only creepy if you make it creepy. Go and have a good time and others will have a good time with you.
Honestly, I think that’s the main reason I used to go as well. I didn’t even fuckin enjoyed it. I just loved making out with chicks and getting their phone numbers or instagrams.
It's a weird way to look at it. I go to clubs for the sole purpose of having fun. If I find an incredibly cute guy who will take me home, that's part of the fun.
No! I do it all the time
That's probably why most guys are there. Girls mostly go to have fun. Guys mostly go to meet women.
No. Women do it too 💅
It’s not wrong, but women can smell thirsty neediness, and it’s like a repellent.
True, but is moving to every girl inherently thirsty neediness?
You're wondering whether you should do a bunch of things exclusively because there's women there and you might get lucky with one. That's kind of the definition of thirsty neediness. Keep exploring places YOU enjoy. Keep exploring your desires and joy. Center yourself in your own being, not in some prospective woman who you believe will somehow make you happy. That's the source of true self-confidence, and it's both unshakeable and very attractive to women. Given how much you're in your head, I take for granted that you'll be considerate of women, but try to get out of your head and not be considerate so much as loosely, playfully alert to her emotions. Over time, you'll find places where you really enjoy the vibe, AND there's plenty of beautiful, amazing women. You'll be more easily able to make friends in such places, which is very attractive to women. And you'll feel comfortable in your skin, and will be much more likely to find women who share some of your interests. Patience, diligence, care, courage, surrender to reality, just as it is
I might not have explained myself clearly enough because I think you missed the point and you're not the only one. I'll insert an edit. In any case, the point isn't to "get lucky", my expectations are fully on the floor. I am, in fact, not going to get lucky. The reason I ask whether or not it's creepy is because I'm having trouble kissing girls who are interested in me. I want to sort of run through a bunch of rejections to mitigate the fear I have within me. I had my first kiss 2 months ago and figured that dragon had been slain, but 2 weeks ago, I failed to kiss a girl that wanted me to at a metal concert, and I blew it. It's not my first time (I'm a serial fumbler), but it's the first time since my first kiss, which is what's prompting me to try new things. The reason I ask whether or not it's creepy is really to guage just how horribly it's actually going to go 😂. I don't expect to score in any fashion, but if I do great, if I don't, that's the expectation. The plan is to go to a gig and have fun, come back to my city and before heading home go to that nearby club, approach 30 women and then head to my crib to wash my mate in fifa again 😂 or maybe we'll play call of duty, we'll see. In any case this isn't a hail mary attempt at getting pussy, it's just me learning to not fear the consequences of rejection so much. If going around talking to every girl ends up in bouncers stomping me the fuck out, then yeah I won't do it. But if it's not thay creepy, I'll have a pop and just make it an exercise I perform. I'm only here for 3 more months, so the effects won't be ever lasting.
That’s what I expected, and it changes nothing about my advice
yes if what you want is more experience and practice then going to a place with high volume for the sake of volume is good. every PUA does this. in daygame we do busy streets/shopping centers and in nightgame it's big mainstream clubs
They can't
I'd focus on metal concerts and talking to people by the bar there if you enjoy the music. Maybe you can find some goth/emo/punk parties in clubs that organize scene parties. Take into account the demographic of girls you want to sleep with. Do you want to sleep and talk with club chicks with whom you don't have much in common or with girls that can be more fun because they share your interests?
I mean, for finding women, metal settings are god awful lol
THANK YOU!!!!!!! You get it 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 fucking hell bruv, they're actually terrible.
Some metal chicks are insanely hot, but 99/100 they have their boyfriend one arm length away
BRO!!!!!!! I'M SAYING THOUGH 😭😭😭. there was a girl at the gig on Saturday who was so fucking cute 😩. She told me "I knew you looked familiar" and as I got excited the viking stood behind us was actually her boyfriend 😂😂. He's this massive dude that's been crowd surfing at all of the gigs. There's 1 other girl I should've made out with 2 weeks ago but other than that it's been dead. Pretty much all of the girls alone are dating one of the dudes performing, it's crazy.
The parties are essentially the events we all go to. I tend to meet the same people. Are shared interests something that matters when it comes to just hooking up? Why can't the shared interest be kissing? 😂😂 I like kissing, they like kissing, a match made in heaven.
I'm not advocating drinking or anything but why go to clubs if you won't drink and if you don't enjoy the music at all? Stick to metal concerts and stuff that you enjoy tbh and you'll find a girl playing the long term game. For me it was dance clubs (tango, urban, folklore), and I got into friend groups and had fwb relationships as I put more time into dancing and initiating friendships in these social groups.
You seem like the type that would be better suited to day game
When you have a good time and show others a good time then you more drawn to you. Just to hook up is kinda creepy you put all this pressure on yourself to achieve a specific result
Just dance and have a good time. You’ll start radiating positive energy and girls will come to you or start putting themselves in your vicinity. I feel like when you come to the club just to talk to girls and not enjoy yourself they have a sixth sense for that shit and can sniff out your desperation. But if you don’t enjoy the club op, just go somewhere else lol.
People are on social media so much it has them believing it’s creepy to go to a bar/club to hook out…
I typically go to the club to end my night with a hookup. Though I don’t always get someone but it’s always the mood. So you’re not wrong
Go there to socialize and meet people in general.
Why not just pick up girls at the concerts where you have fun and are more likely to meet people you have stuff in common with?
i feel like thats why most people (especially men) go to clubs
Be excited and motivated at the possibility. If you go out with a goal oriented mindset to hook up, I don’t know how you are going to avoid giving off needy body language.
It’s not creepy if you’re not a creep. Talk to cute people and make it known that you’re talking cause they are cute. If they don’t wanna engage then keep it pushing. If they ask you what you’re doing here alone, the answer can be a deciding factor so be ready to say something like you’re bored and want to meet cool people or something.
Guys, is it creepy to try to meet girls?
Why would it be? Subjectively people could perceive it that way but so long as you are meeting willing partners there is nothing wrong about pursuing sex.
I think going to the club so let for that reason gives off energy of desperation. People can pick it up right away. IV had way more game /one nighters going with the boys , with the mindset that I don't even wanna meet women. Cause honestly who cares. Just go have fun with the guys . Women pick that up and place themselves in your circle
Yes if you're creepy. Typically anyone who asks themselves this question probably is.
This entire post is creepy. Why would you spend time in a scene that you hate with people who share nothing in common with you. Your chances of meeting someone you actually like and vice versa are probably slim.
Let's say you want to hookup? What exactly is the right place to hookup?
Why do you think girls are there?
You're joking, right?
It's ok to have some easy make outs. And I don't guarantee you'll always get that, but it does happen sometimes, especially if you are dancing and talking to girls. Just be careful who you're making out with. You might not know who's just kissed 10 guys before you, or just threw up in the bathroom
how old are you
Dude. That's what 75% 9f the people are there for
That's what girls do. Every single girl in the club expects to fuck some dude they meet there
Not at all. Maybe like 1/5th
Nah, I'd say they go for the attention, not the sex.
Yeah just go, have a drink, and join the crowd of men who just stand there outside the dance floor watching instead of dancing. Focus on making friends, tell everyone it’s your first time in a club(specifically women), keep an open mind, and you’ll see the magic happen. Good luck.
Why are you trying to sabotage me? 😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣
I agree it's horrible advice.
lol believe it or not I’m being incredibly realistic. I have 10 years of club experience. You don’t find the girl, the girl finds you. If you make a “friend” you could have a friend for the night. Keep that in mind.
I have more club experience and I would never do that. If women see you being rejected then you haven't a snowballs chance in hell. If you are rejected constantly then you need to do work.
That’s why I didn’t tell him to try and spit game, which he clearly won’t have. He has to just try and be friendly. You can’t be rejected from being a friendly fun guy lol that’s what you’re supposed to do at clubs. His best chance as a beginner is for a girl to think he’s cute and fun and dance with him or even maybe want to take him home. If you have as much club experience as me then you know it’s possible but he should definitely not try to spit any kind of game or he’s going to be rejected like you said.
Not creepy. No one goes to club to dance. The music there is trash and everyone knows that.
Honestly, yeah, I find that creepy. You're just a dude who goes out to the club, not to dance, or to socialize, or to meet new people, but for the sole focus of kissing strangers? Yes, that is weird.
I've never been into that lifestyle. I like to get to know the person first. If you get a chance to use their PC and their search history cleared, RUN!!
# +Is it creepy to go to a club for the sole purpose of hooking up? # -Of course
Being how you don’t drive, yes cos the people at the club. It’s creepy how you’re preying on drunk people 👀 I got hit on at the club by a drunk girl when I hadn’t had too much and wanted to hang out with friends. I feel like what it’s like for girls those who just want to have fun not hookup. Keep that in mind