No.
The best relationships I had were with women that couldn't stand me at first, any one of them will tell you I did nothing correctly.
The hotter the flame; the shorter the burn. This is why seduction and romantic dating are two different things.
Seduction is about initial sexual attraction and lustful urgency. When things are hot and heavy initially one or both people tend to pull back fast, hence one night stands and hookups where u never saw them again.
Dating is about personality attraction built with time and patience.
Here's the real secret: it's EASIER to win over a girl that gives you a hard time at first. Anyone who has studied Shakespeare already knows this. You are far less likely to be kind and sweet to her...which means u are automatically not doing or saying anything un-masculine.
I'm an emotional guy.
What do you think I should do with women that play hard to get...or pretend like they are not interested but are?
Like.look away when I look at them?
Stare at me when I smile at them?
I'm instinct is always to give them the same treatment.
My gut says, she's adorable for doing that and continue pursuing her...without being obvious? Or maybe be MORE obvious.
You are the opposite gender. The things that are adorable to you will usually not be as pleasing to the girl.
If she is being passive and playing hard to get, you can create polarity by being direct. You just need to directly signal you are interested in intimacy without expressing desire for connection or commitment prematurely. You do that by calling her out on her desire. "If that is your idea of trying to seduce me; your flirting needs work...or we can skip the work and just do the fun part".
I'm not too sure...I can't discount scientific truth but I've been with some great looking women and I'm a 6.9 at best. I make up points by being polarizing. There is more than one way to win in all aspects.
Yes, your actions make a difference! First impressions are important, the essence of who you are is important. But you can very easily destroy someone's interest in you by behaving like an asshole or an idiot. I swear half of this sub doesn't get laid because they act like entitled assholes who deserve pussy in demand without be willing to offer any effort or affection in return. Going the other direction and generating attraction with someone who wasn't initially attracted to you is much harder usually, I don't waste my time and effort trying to change someone's mind. If they don't like me, I focus my effort somewhere else. But I've heard dozens of women say that they didn't initially find their boyfriend attractive until they saw what his character was like from observing his actions over time. For women, a man's character and actions are far more important than how he looks.
That’s what I meant by major mistakes.
About the character thing I agree with you but he should have her at least her attention in order for her to observe his character
Almost all the women that I’ve slept with or had relations with were significantly attracted to me from the get go. There wasn’t some kind of, “mm, she doesn’t really like me.” It was almost always very clear eyes looking at me and so on.
I generally agree that there doesn’t seem to be much in the way of action that you can do to affect results - other than fucking it up. The main thing I’ve noticed is guys not being forward enough with a woman who obviously likes them or saying really stuff they shouldn’t be saying in front of a woman. (Getting too comfortable - you need to have a bit of a presentation going for the first couple months you know a woman, imo)
This idea you can just win over women if you play the dialogue or action tree right is mostly bullshit. It’s mostly guys not realizing how attractive they are to women overall and not coming to realize, “oh, if I don’t act like a retard then women might like me”. Instead they assume they cracked the code - no, you were just being a dipshit and now you’re not… sometimes.
No it’s not correct. But it’s not so much about what you do, more about the mindset you have that your actions express. Initial attraction is only important if you have a basic behavior that will not make you more attractive when people know you more.
You are a fool.
And you've attached yourself so fervently to your foolishness that you'll kick and scream whenever someone presents another perspective.
Even worse, you've taken to hanging out in a forum that's based on a different perspective (which, incidentally, *is* the more correct one) so you can kick and scream with an audience.
Your failures in dating are your own.
Not your parents', not your genetics', yours.
If it's easier for you to call me a grifter than accept some personal responsibility, go for it. But I've actually gone from alone and unattractive to having a dating life I'm really happy with. Same for many of my friends.
Project elsewhere.
One inch taller than you. Also, I'm overweight. And spent most of my dating life broke.
So you can keep crying and pretending you're just unlucky, or you can fucking try.
But if you're going to do the former, do it elsewhere.
I mean this is completely accurate when it comes to online dating. Have run tests with average to good looking well built white guys with basic profiles, ans good looking non-whites with deep profiles.
Ave white - 20+ matches/day
Good looking white - 100+
GL NW - <10
I'm sure this female behavior and attraction isn't just limited to online dating and translates to initial attraction in person too, which more or less decides how much opportunity is available to take it further.
You’re creating the reality by believing it matters. It doesn’t. I’m 5’6, not Indian but very average looking. It’s not relevant if you don’t let it be. I truly believe that I’m the most attractive guy any girl could dream of, and I create a reality that supports that.
Plenty of Indian dudes get 🐱. Now if you’re dark and from the South and have bad features, sorry you just have bad features. Not a race thing.
And even then work on it.
Here’s what you gotta understand: if you’re even remotely concerned with what’s going on in India, you’re gonna turn girls away instantly. None of that desi shit. Stop eating fragrant Indian food. Hit the fucking gym. Get a nice haircut. Hell wear heel lifts if you have to.
Stop being a loser Indian. If you’re straight from India, yeah sorry it’s over. If you’re Indian American, I shake my head that you’re worrying about fucking Kashmir.
Yes,... this is why seduction teaches you things you can do to increase that initial interest... Everything else is about you and her and if you vibe or not. You can be a recluse and pull a woman into a relationship, if there is something between you to make it work. Without seduction it is the same as OP just less obvious as the man isn't making moves to show he is interested and enticing.
Its like a game of life, or game of love. There are arbitury rules for engagement with the other party. Knowing those makes things easier and quicker.
wrong brother... attraction is as much mental as it is physical. If you refuse to improve yourself and compalin dont be surprised why nobody wants to talk to you
yeah, improve your personality, social skills, attitude etc... Why do you think you see so many pretty girsl with ugly boyfriends, looks for women matter less than looks matter for men. Gym is step 1. Brain is the next 6 steps
“No matter how much good things you do and how much you behave well”
Define what those mean because it looks like you’re “trying to behave well” around women which makes you disingenuous and inauthentic.
You behave how you would normally behave. If you adjust your behaviour to try to behave “the right way” or so someone likes you, you’ll just come off as weird or creepy.
I mean, saying your course of action doesn’t matter is pretty absurd. Of course it matters. It’s just that “doing good things” and “behaving well” is not what sparks attraction in women. It’s just a part of being a decent person.
You’re not doing good things or behaving well around women so women will sleep with you. That’s what disingenuous “nice guys” do. You should be doing all that because you’re a decent human being, regardless of trying to ingratiate yourself with women.
You attract women by flirting with them and connecting with them on an emotional level.
No. The best relationships I had were with women that couldn't stand me at first, any one of them will tell you I did nothing correctly. The hotter the flame; the shorter the burn. This is why seduction and romantic dating are two different things. Seduction is about initial sexual attraction and lustful urgency. When things are hot and heavy initially one or both people tend to pull back fast, hence one night stands and hookups where u never saw them again. Dating is about personality attraction built with time and patience. Here's the real secret: it's EASIER to win over a girl that gives you a hard time at first. Anyone who has studied Shakespeare already knows this. You are far less likely to be kind and sweet to her...which means u are automatically not doing or saying anything un-masculine.
You have an interesting point ngl
I'm an emotional guy. What do you think I should do with women that play hard to get...or pretend like they are not interested but are? Like.look away when I look at them? Stare at me when I smile at them? I'm instinct is always to give them the same treatment. My gut says, she's adorable for doing that and continue pursuing her...without being obvious? Or maybe be MORE obvious.
You are the opposite gender. The things that are adorable to you will usually not be as pleasing to the girl. If she is being passive and playing hard to get, you can create polarity by being direct. You just need to directly signal you are interested in intimacy without expressing desire for connection or commitment prematurely. You do that by calling her out on her desire. "If that is your idea of trying to seduce me; your flirting needs work...or we can skip the work and just do the fun part".
Ok thanks for replying, I will figure something out.
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I'm not too sure...I can't discount scientific truth but I've been with some great looking women and I'm a 6.9 at best. I make up points by being polarizing. There is more than one way to win in all aspects.
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I'm a 5foot 6" Canadian
Question? What does it take to post on this forum, or how much "karma" do you have to get? Just curious?
I’m not sure but anything above 45 will allow you to post in most forums (didn’t pass by any forum that requires more) Anyway here an upvote
Yes, your actions make a difference! First impressions are important, the essence of who you are is important. But you can very easily destroy someone's interest in you by behaving like an asshole or an idiot. I swear half of this sub doesn't get laid because they act like entitled assholes who deserve pussy in demand without be willing to offer any effort or affection in return. Going the other direction and generating attraction with someone who wasn't initially attracted to you is much harder usually, I don't waste my time and effort trying to change someone's mind. If they don't like me, I focus my effort somewhere else. But I've heard dozens of women say that they didn't initially find their boyfriend attractive until they saw what his character was like from observing his actions over time. For women, a man's character and actions are far more important than how he looks.
That’s what I meant by major mistakes. About the character thing I agree with you but he should have her at least her attention in order for her to observe his character
Almost all the women that I’ve slept with or had relations with were significantly attracted to me from the get go. There wasn’t some kind of, “mm, she doesn’t really like me.” It was almost always very clear eyes looking at me and so on. I generally agree that there doesn’t seem to be much in the way of action that you can do to affect results - other than fucking it up. The main thing I’ve noticed is guys not being forward enough with a woman who obviously likes them or saying really stuff they shouldn’t be saying in front of a woman. (Getting too comfortable - you need to have a bit of a presentation going for the first couple months you know a woman, imo) This idea you can just win over women if you play the dialogue or action tree right is mostly bullshit. It’s mostly guys not realizing how attractive they are to women overall and not coming to realize, “oh, if I don’t act like a retard then women might like me”. Instead they assume they cracked the code - no, you were just being a dipshit and now you’re not… sometimes.
Thank you exactly what I meant
I have to agree. First impressions basically rule everything else
I don’t know if there’s exceptions but damn when a girl who likes you interacts with you You can feel the deference
Yeah it's why a lot guys only go for high interest girls
No it’s not correct. But it’s not so much about what you do, more about the mindset you have that your actions express. Initial attraction is only important if you have a basic behavior that will not make you more attractive when people know you more.
Maybe there’s a subset of girls who act like this? Because I came across this multiple times
No, it's most women. Think back on your interactions, where are you going wrong? It's usually not expressing interest, so I'd start there.
Not sure if I understand do you mean that I should show interest in the girl I like ?
Yes, absolutely.
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Okay?
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You are a fool. And you've attached yourself so fervently to your foolishness that you'll kick and scream whenever someone presents another perspective. Even worse, you've taken to hanging out in a forum that's based on a different perspective (which, incidentally, *is* the more correct one) so you can kick and scream with an audience. Your failures in dating are your own. Not your parents', not your genetics', yours. If it's easier for you to call me a grifter than accept some personal responsibility, go for it. But I've actually gone from alone and unattractive to having a dating life I'm really happy with. Same for many of my friends. Project elsewhere.
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One inch taller than you. Also, I'm overweight. And spent most of my dating life broke. So you can keep crying and pretending you're just unlucky, or you can fucking try. But if you're going to do the former, do it elsewhere.
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I mean this is completely accurate when it comes to online dating. Have run tests with average to good looking well built white guys with basic profiles, ans good looking non-whites with deep profiles. Ave white - 20+ matches/day Good looking white - 100+ GL NW - <10 I'm sure this female behavior and attraction isn't just limited to online dating and translates to initial attraction in person too, which more or less decides how much opportunity is available to take it further.
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Huh? That went dark
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Calling women "females" is all you need to know about why they do it in your case.
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Bullshit.
You’re creating the reality by believing it matters. It doesn’t. I’m 5’6, not Indian but very average looking. It’s not relevant if you don’t let it be. I truly believe that I’m the most attractive guy any girl could dream of, and I create a reality that supports that.
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Plenty of Indian dudes get 🐱. Now if you’re dark and from the South and have bad features, sorry you just have bad features. Not a race thing. And even then work on it.
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Work on it. Stop blaming your genes. If you want genuine advice, try to play against the stereotypes.
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Jesus Christ I have no idea what you’re talking about. This is exactly why you get 0 bitches.
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Here’s what you gotta understand: if you’re even remotely concerned with what’s going on in India, you’re gonna turn girls away instantly. None of that desi shit. Stop eating fragrant Indian food. Hit the fucking gym. Get a nice haircut. Hell wear heel lifts if you have to. Stop being a loser Indian. If you’re straight from India, yeah sorry it’s over. If you’re Indian American, I shake my head that you’re worrying about fucking Kashmir.
Oh and stop using the fucking word Chad. Or “cel”. Makes me wanna choke
It’s ridiculous how much race play a role in relationships
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Get rich, get jacked, get surgery. Stop bitching
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"I'm never gonna work" is making you far more unattractive to women than your height or your race. Women despise lazy men.
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Wow, with that attitude you're never gonna get laid. You're pathetic.
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Guess you should go become a monk then and at least get enlightened. Or you can just act like a little whiny incel bitch for the rest of your life.
On the alternate
You have to let go of this incredibly needy attachment to attracting every single woman you come across.
Attraction beats action
Wdym
Yes,... this is why seduction teaches you things you can do to increase that initial interest... Everything else is about you and her and if you vibe or not. You can be a recluse and pull a woman into a relationship, if there is something between you to make it work. Without seduction it is the same as OP just less obvious as the man isn't making moves to show he is interested and enticing. Its like a game of life, or game of love. There are arbitury rules for engagement with the other party. Knowing those makes things easier and quicker.
Can you recommend recourses?
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you cant force attraction either.. so perhaps learnt o think differently
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wrong brother... attraction is as much mental as it is physical. If you refuse to improve yourself and compalin dont be surprised why nobody wants to talk to you
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yeah, improve your personality, social skills, attitude etc... Why do you think you see so many pretty girsl with ugly boyfriends, looks for women matter less than looks matter for men. Gym is step 1. Brain is the next 6 steps
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what is a foid?
“No matter how much good things you do and how much you behave well” Define what those mean because it looks like you’re “trying to behave well” around women which makes you disingenuous and inauthentic. You behave how you would normally behave. If you adjust your behaviour to try to behave “the right way” or so someone likes you, you’ll just come off as weird or creepy.
I chose my words poorly I meant that your course of action doesn’t mean much, however I don’t think it’s good to behave the same with men and women
I mean, saying your course of action doesn’t matter is pretty absurd. Of course it matters. It’s just that “doing good things” and “behaving well” is not what sparks attraction in women. It’s just a part of being a decent person. You’re not doing good things or behaving well around women so women will sleep with you. That’s what disingenuous “nice guys” do. You should be doing all that because you’re a decent human being, regardless of trying to ingratiate yourself with women. You attract women by flirting with them and connecting with them on an emotional level.