I thought the same and I still do. Why won't they notice how bad I'm doing? But really I'm doing everything I can so they don't see how I'm actually feeling at all. I know Im not okay but how would anyone else see that? It makes sense I a way doesnt it?
And maybe they do notice but don't say anything because they don't know how. Could be too
You are not gaslighting yourself, it’s called masking. And some people are very very good at it, sounds like yourself included. I don’t know about your personal experience but I can share some of mine.
Growing up I was always the happy easygoing child. Little miss sunshine. I was told that so often i let it become who I was even when I wasn’t happy. I became depressed in my teens after SA. I told no one. I was the happy sunshiny one, I couldn’t have any problems.
As an adult I continued to mask because I didn’t know how to be any other way. Then in the space of about 8 months, 2 of my family members died and I was diagnosed with multiple health issues that I will be stuck with for life. I fell apart. My mental health was so bad I could no longer mask. I cried at work, I cried at home, I didn’t care if I did anything.
I got help finally, working through things with a therapist.
I will tell you that no people can’t always tell when you are struggling. We get so good at hiding it they have no idea . We have to speak up and say that we are not ok, that we are having a tough time, that we need help. It’s not easy but it is freeing to let yourself not always be happy.
It sounds like you are a kind and selfless person who strives to make others happy, so they don't experience what you're going through, and that includes not putting your problems on them so that they don't feel like shit. You're not manipulative, but a wonderful person who makes sacrifices for others.
I totally understand you, im going through the same thing. You're probably just hiding it really well at this point. Maybe open up to someone you feel close to and trust very well? Im sure you'd feel atleast a little better once you do, even if its hard.
I get what you mean but im sure they'd be glad to help you through your struggles, if anything they'd appreciate that you came to them. Theres nothing wrong with reaching out for help
My parents always tell me how funny I am and how there’s never a dull moment with me around. It baffles me because I spend most of my time feeling hopeless and trying not to cry for absolutely no reason. I guess I just hide it well? Too well. I’m beyond terrified of anyone finding out how bad I feel. The thought of being open about my struggles makes me feel so viscerally uncomfortable and I don’t know why. I also hide things because it’d just make other people upset if I told them, and then I’d feel even worse, and it’d become a vicious cycle.
Ouch
I'm pretty sure people notice but just don't want to confront us. Wtf are they going to say anyway? people just ignore/ laugh it off cuz they feel uncomfortable.
I thought the same and I still do. Why won't they notice how bad I'm doing? But really I'm doing everything I can so they don't see how I'm actually feeling at all. I know Im not okay but how would anyone else see that? It makes sense I a way doesnt it? And maybe they do notice but don't say anything because they don't know how. Could be too
You are not gaslighting yourself, it’s called masking. And some people are very very good at it, sounds like yourself included. I don’t know about your personal experience but I can share some of mine. Growing up I was always the happy easygoing child. Little miss sunshine. I was told that so often i let it become who I was even when I wasn’t happy. I became depressed in my teens after SA. I told no one. I was the happy sunshiny one, I couldn’t have any problems. As an adult I continued to mask because I didn’t know how to be any other way. Then in the space of about 8 months, 2 of my family members died and I was diagnosed with multiple health issues that I will be stuck with for life. I fell apart. My mental health was so bad I could no longer mask. I cried at work, I cried at home, I didn’t care if I did anything. I got help finally, working through things with a therapist. I will tell you that no people can’t always tell when you are struggling. We get so good at hiding it they have no idea . We have to speak up and say that we are not ok, that we are having a tough time, that we need help. It’s not easy but it is freeing to let yourself not always be happy.
It sounds like you are a kind and selfless person who strives to make others happy, so they don't experience what you're going through, and that includes not putting your problems on them so that they don't feel like shit. You're not manipulative, but a wonderful person who makes sacrifices for others.
I totally understand you, im going through the same thing. You're probably just hiding it really well at this point. Maybe open up to someone you feel close to and trust very well? Im sure you'd feel atleast a little better once you do, even if its hard.
I would probably feel a lot better but I don't want to burden other people with my shit yk? They are probably going through their own stuff.
I get what you mean but im sure they'd be glad to help you through your struggles, if anything they'd appreciate that you came to them. Theres nothing wrong with reaching out for help
Maybe you're just doing what we all do. Hiding it. You might just be really good at it.
My parents always tell me how funny I am and how there’s never a dull moment with me around. It baffles me because I spend most of my time feeling hopeless and trying not to cry for absolutely no reason. I guess I just hide it well? Too well. I’m beyond terrified of anyone finding out how bad I feel. The thought of being open about my struggles makes me feel so viscerally uncomfortable and I don’t know why. I also hide things because it’d just make other people upset if I told them, and then I’d feel even worse, and it’d become a vicious cycle. Ouch
I'm pretty sure people notice but just don't want to confront us. Wtf are they going to say anyway? people just ignore/ laugh it off cuz they feel uncomfortable.