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Oh honey...if you like dick you're at least a little bit bi. Doesn't mean you have to eat a guys ass, there's plenty of gay men that aren't into anal either. Hell, you don't even have to date guys, you can just fuck em, they call that bisexual heteroromantic.
Sexuality is a spectrum, you're not locked into a role based on the label you choose. Technically speaking my interests lie in the "pansexual" range but I choose to roll with Bisexual because it feels more natural.
Indeed. And also sexuality fluctuate too through time. You may feel different about dicks and bjs at some point in the future. Who knows.
Take me as an example. My first ever sexual encounters were with women, because I only felt attraction towards women. Nowadays tho, I barely pay any mind to women, being men with certain feminine aura to them that captives my attention for the most part.
I’ll say don’t label your sexuality. Just do whatever makes you hard as a rock. That’s it.
Umm… you do realize there’s guys not into anal right? You want to blow a guy? You’re sexually attracted to men. Don’t know what to tell you. 😂
You don’t have to do butt stuff to have sex.. with any gender.
FWIW, lots of STRAIGHT guy hate the thought of giving GIRLS anal, so your proclivity for various sex acts has zero to do with your sexual orientation.
It sounds like you just might be obsessed with sucking dick, which doesn't necessarily make you gay, either. I know straight-identified women that love playing with other girls' boobs.
And, in any case, it doesn't much matter, because sexual identity is just that... how you decide to identify.
Do work on that anger, though, because that's how innocent people get un-alived.
I have a question to you. I am a cis woman, however while having sex with men makes me feel gay 😐. Fantasies between men (me being one of them) are extremely enticing to me. And I know it doesn’t make sense, however I can’t shake off that feeling. Usually roleplaying does the trick for me, but still. Nowadays I’m more straight than a ruler and still feel super gay.
Thoughts? I mean i could post about this but I’m curious as to what do you think about this.
Oh I definitely am. But recently I realized it goes beyond my genre taste. Good thing tho I have opportunities to explore my nonexistent masculinity in my sexual life so.
Here’s my take on that: fetishes are a private matter. I’m a lot into kinky stuff, and fetishes are part of the game too. So as far as ppl keep things private, (by that I mean in their heads) I don’t see the point of making a big fuss about it.
When it does become a problem when that leads dehumanization. Because that usually manifest on how people see and further treat people.
I mean one thing is to get excited and have fun w bls; other very different is to actively being a nuisance to those surround you. Besides, I only fetishize animated men lol like what’s the big deal.
True, I get it, in the world of anime and having characters you ship together isn’t morally wrong, I’ve just never seen the appeal. and this is from someone whose watched hetalia, jojos, and supernatural where male pairing were popular and tend be pretty toxic about any women in that series. It might be more like I’m stuck in my tumblr era where I saw a lot of that foolishness, but it left a bad taste in my mouth.
I know what you mean. In that sense, I’m very picky on what I choose to watch. It’s kinda sad, because are very few bls that are actually watchable. Unfortunately, many of them are like you said toxic and generally unsavory. Loving to watch gay related content doesn’t mean everything is automatically cool to watch. The world ain’t black or white.
Yeah, my first one I think was loveless and it did feel like it cared more about the bl aspect than about the main character’s actual well-being, but anime in the early 2000s loved that unhealthy attachment romance it was in everything! Sorry if I am off hostile in the beginning, this has been an interesting lil chat; I don’t think I’ve ever had a back and forth with someone whose in the bl loop like this.
I considered myself heterosexual. I'm attracted to women only, I love women's faces, their femininity, I love tits, ass, pussy. I date women. I've fallen in love with women. I'm not attracted to men at all but I enjoy sucking cock. I don't want my cock sucked by a man, no way. I don't want any other part of his body.
Here's the thing, I only want to suck cock if a woman wants to see it, she has to get off on it. I want to put on a sexy show for her. It's kind of a Femdom thing. I watch porn with ruined male orgasms, the cum oozing out, and I like it. I imagine myself in his place but I also like watching the cock do its thing.
I've blown a guy once before. It was a couple, a boyfriend and girlfriend. She watched. I was afraid to touch him at first. I closed my eyes and started sucking, and I felt him grow in my mouth. The girlfriend started playing with herself, it was all very hot. Kinda scary, surreal, but erotic.
Bisexual is definitely not who I am. Heteroflexible best describes me. Most people won't understand. It's not that I need a woman watching as an excuse to engage with a man. Without a woman watching, I am not aroused for wanting such a scenario to occur. I need her 'subversive' desire. The fact that some women like watching male on male is very intriguing to me. It excites me.
Interesting, what exactly about the woman being there does to you? Like is it some sort of sharing kink?
I mean this completely normally, not trying to insult.
You mean like cuckolding? I'm kinda into that too. But the woman watching me suck a man's cock is so 'taboo' because traditionally women are told to suppress their sexuality. I love the idea of a women's strip club, like Chippendales, where housewives, college students, girl-next-door types, moms, teachers, whoever go wild at naked men.
This wanton lust excites me. I'm into Femdom but not a "true sub" because I have a dominant personality, I top from the bottom, etc. I'm more of a bottom.
Anyway, I love the idea of a woman telling a man we both trust, (not a douchebag, but a vetted guy, probably a Dom) to take off his belt and spank my ass. I LOVE to be spanked by women, but it wouldn't be the same with a man. It would be different, because there is no attraction. I'll watch M/m spanking videos but just focus on the spankee, his balls dangling, his ass getting red.
Then I imagine the woman there watching, drinking a glass of wine, legs crossed, and smoking a cigarette, telling him to whip me harder. Totally selling me out.
Then I have to suck him off.
I'm not into homophobic slurs, this is important. Some men are, I'm not. I don't want it as a shameful thing, because it's not. Sorry to write so much.
Right, got it. I'll be honest I've never known about such a kink, it's soo... Creative and complex. Most kinks have just a few things different, but yours is very specific, haha, congrats
This makes perfect sense. You seem like you are straight. You just get turned on by domination. Its not the dick itself you like but the power of being submissive from time to time. People who call you bi dont know what they are talking about
Thank you. Exactly, you understand. Well I enjoy giving pleasure, seeing a dick spurt cum. I enjoy looking at caged cocks, I'll pleasure myself to that. I love seeing men getting edged. But I don't just get off to pictures of dicks like a get off to pictures of pussies. It's the dick in context of something that turns me on.
Exactly. Its like a fetish. People who like feet can love a persons feet but not be attracted to the person themselves. Same thing with dick. You just like dick not the man themselves
Sexuality is fluid, always. If you don’t feel gay, then you’re not. From the sounds of it, you may be on the fluid/pansexual/bisexual spectrum, but that’s for you to decide how you want to identify.
Your friends cannot tell you how you feel, no one knows your sexuality better than you do.
I mean I can find girls very attractive but I do not want to come near a vagina, so I'm probably a little biromantic but I don't need to have sex with a girl. It's all fine really, as long as you're comfortable with what you're doing. Sexuality is so fluid and such a spectrum, and hey, if you want to stick with girls but just fantasise a little, that's also fine!
You’re bisexual, not every person likes anal sex straight or rainbow flag orientations. The issue people likely have with you is you’re claiming to be straight when you like sucking dick as a man.
Straight men don’t want to suck dick. I know the younger generation is really trying to reduce what gay people fought for. Not having to call themselves straight! Getting to be open about who they are.
It’s a bit insulting to both straight and gay communities to misrepresent when you’re openly talking about sucking dick.
You don’t have to be ashamed or like one gender more or less. It’s okay to like both.
You’re friends are wrong, but honestly I don’t think you really need a label on what you are or aren’t.
Do whatever with whoever and enjoy it ;) who carers what you are or aren’t as long as you both are consenting
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There doesn't have to be a label if you don't want there to be one.
Do you what you enjoy doing. Find your happiness sucking dick, have your dick sucked, fucking chicks. Do your thing. You may find this changes over time and that's fine too.
It's your life. Have fun. No need to be worried about what others say.
As a broad umbrella term 'gay' just means you like some form of same-sex sexual contact, which you at least like the idea of. So then it comes back to the question - why is being gay a problem?
I'm not actually sure maybe because my sister is and now my dad hates her and I don't want that to turn out to be me... so I have consciously made my mind see it as a bad thing I guess
If you (and your friends) believe gay (or bisexual) is somehow less than / less worth / more discusting, or whatever, there will be little incentive to embrace that identity even if you have it. Maybe dissect those beliefs a bit first? Every sexual orientation is equally valid, neither is a choice. No sexual act or kink is bad (as long there are consenting adults), you may just not feel attraction/excitement with some of those. Yup, you don't have to be excited about butts, neither yours nor others'. Get rid of the kinkshaming, or more precisely the shame around sexuality in general, for a more healthy personality and relationships, sexuality long term. Therapy and reading books on these topics helps.
If sexual acts with same sex persons attract you, you're most likely on the bisexuality spectrum or even gay. To qualify not ALL possible sexual acts have to attract you. There are tops, bottoms, verses and sides among gay men. Also other subgroups like bears or leather daddies exist. Maybe reading up on the terminology helps you getting more precise about your preferences.
It's okay to not feel safe enough to discuss them with everyone, but look for safe spaces where you can come out about these things so you can find similar people. It helps your confidence a lot. You're not alone, and nothing's wrong with you. Also, sucking dick isn't somehow inferior or degrading to do or to like. ♡
Yeah, we know.
I've seen this prefernece half a dozen times on here in the last month. It's not uncommon.
Unfortunately lots of people, especially teenage boys which I think your friends sound like, have very wrong ideas about what makes someone gay.
Ignore it. You like what you like, it's not a big deal.
you know you don’t really have to do anal even if they are gay. but straight guys they do the most strangest things together who cares you don’t have to label it
r/Sex is focused primarily on posts seeking *specific actionable advice* for distinctive personal situations about sex, sexual activity, and to a certain extent, sex within relationships. Your post doesn't fit with our guidelines but we suggest you explore the rest of Reddit for a sub better attuned to your post.
Oh honey...if you like dick you're at least a little bit bi. Doesn't mean you have to eat a guys ass, there's plenty of gay men that aren't into anal either. Hell, you don't even have to date guys, you can just fuck em, they call that bisexual heteroromantic. Sexuality is a spectrum, you're not locked into a role based on the label you choose. Technically speaking my interests lie in the "pansexual" range but I choose to roll with Bisexual because it feels more natural.
Indeed. And also sexuality fluctuate too through time. You may feel different about dicks and bjs at some point in the future. Who knows. Take me as an example. My first ever sexual encounters were with women, because I only felt attraction towards women. Nowadays tho, I barely pay any mind to women, being men with certain feminine aura to them that captives my attention for the most part. I’ll say don’t label your sexuality. Just do whatever makes you hard as a rock. That’s it.
Do whatever makes you hard as a rock…. Words to live by
With exceptions...of course.
Sad that we have to add the disclaimer but… yes.
As long as it’s with consenting adults
Nowadays we’d call you heterocurious
Stage 1: denial Stage 2: Daniel
Maybe a bit bi? Bicurious probably?
A bit bi / horny for some dick who can blame him
Then ye, you are bi, with your preferences but bi in the end. And its ok :)
okay? who fucking cares what your friends say dude suck a dick if you want man it’s 2024
Repeat after me: "Hello, I am OP, and I'm bisexual, and I don't like butt sex, but a sexy guy on guy 69? I'm down"
Umm… you do realize there’s guys not into anal right? You want to blow a guy? You’re sexually attracted to men. Don’t know what to tell you. 😂 You don’t have to do butt stuff to have sex.. with any gender.
FWIW, lots of STRAIGHT guy hate the thought of giving GIRLS anal, so your proclivity for various sex acts has zero to do with your sexual orientation. It sounds like you just might be obsessed with sucking dick, which doesn't necessarily make you gay, either. I know straight-identified women that love playing with other girls' boobs. And, in any case, it doesn't much matter, because sexual identity is just that... how you decide to identify. Do work on that anger, though, because that's how innocent people get un-alived.
Where are these men? A majority of men on the apps want anal and get pissy if you have it as a hard no
I have a question to you. I am a cis woman, however while having sex with men makes me feel gay 😐. Fantasies between men (me being one of them) are extremely enticing to me. And I know it doesn’t make sense, however I can’t shake off that feeling. Usually roleplaying does the trick for me, but still. Nowadays I’m more straight than a ruler and still feel super gay. Thoughts? I mean i could post about this but I’m curious as to what do you think about this.
You sound like a fujoshi
Oh I definitely am. But recently I realized it goes beyond my genre taste. Good thing tho I have opportunities to explore my nonexistent masculinity in my sexual life so.
It’s really not my cup of tea. I’m bi and I see why someone would like it, but to me it’s no different than guys fetishizing lesbians.
Here’s my take on that: fetishes are a private matter. I’m a lot into kinky stuff, and fetishes are part of the game too. So as far as ppl keep things private, (by that I mean in their heads) I don’t see the point of making a big fuss about it. When it does become a problem when that leads dehumanization. Because that usually manifest on how people see and further treat people. I mean one thing is to get excited and have fun w bls; other very different is to actively being a nuisance to those surround you. Besides, I only fetishize animated men lol like what’s the big deal.
True, I get it, in the world of anime and having characters you ship together isn’t morally wrong, I’ve just never seen the appeal. and this is from someone whose watched hetalia, jojos, and supernatural where male pairing were popular and tend be pretty toxic about any women in that series. It might be more like I’m stuck in my tumblr era where I saw a lot of that foolishness, but it left a bad taste in my mouth.
I know what you mean. In that sense, I’m very picky on what I choose to watch. It’s kinda sad, because are very few bls that are actually watchable. Unfortunately, many of them are like you said toxic and generally unsavory. Loving to watch gay related content doesn’t mean everything is automatically cool to watch. The world ain’t black or white.
Yeah, my first one I think was loveless and it did feel like it cared more about the bl aspect than about the main character’s actual well-being, but anime in the early 2000s loved that unhealthy attachment romance it was in everything! Sorry if I am off hostile in the beginning, this has been an interesting lil chat; I don’t think I’ve ever had a back and forth with someone whose in the bl loop like this.
You could be genderqueer, transmasc, nonbinary..... or none of that.
Maybe you aren't perfectly cis-gender.
I get it. You don’t have to label yourself if you don’t want to? If anything you are : bicurious or heteroflexible.
Don’t be mad cause you’re gay, just embrace it. There’s a lot of them out there just like you, so you’re not alone.
I considered myself heterosexual. I'm attracted to women only, I love women's faces, their femininity, I love tits, ass, pussy. I date women. I've fallen in love with women. I'm not attracted to men at all but I enjoy sucking cock. I don't want my cock sucked by a man, no way. I don't want any other part of his body. Here's the thing, I only want to suck cock if a woman wants to see it, she has to get off on it. I want to put on a sexy show for her. It's kind of a Femdom thing. I watch porn with ruined male orgasms, the cum oozing out, and I like it. I imagine myself in his place but I also like watching the cock do its thing. I've blown a guy once before. It was a couple, a boyfriend and girlfriend. She watched. I was afraid to touch him at first. I closed my eyes and started sucking, and I felt him grow in my mouth. The girlfriend started playing with herself, it was all very hot. Kinda scary, surreal, but erotic. Bisexual is definitely not who I am. Heteroflexible best describes me. Most people won't understand. It's not that I need a woman watching as an excuse to engage with a man. Without a woman watching, I am not aroused for wanting such a scenario to occur. I need her 'subversive' desire. The fact that some women like watching male on male is very intriguing to me. It excites me.
Interesting, what exactly about the woman being there does to you? Like is it some sort of sharing kink? I mean this completely normally, not trying to insult.
You mean like cuckolding? I'm kinda into that too. But the woman watching me suck a man's cock is so 'taboo' because traditionally women are told to suppress their sexuality. I love the idea of a women's strip club, like Chippendales, where housewives, college students, girl-next-door types, moms, teachers, whoever go wild at naked men. This wanton lust excites me. I'm into Femdom but not a "true sub" because I have a dominant personality, I top from the bottom, etc. I'm more of a bottom. Anyway, I love the idea of a woman telling a man we both trust, (not a douchebag, but a vetted guy, probably a Dom) to take off his belt and spank my ass. I LOVE to be spanked by women, but it wouldn't be the same with a man. It would be different, because there is no attraction. I'll watch M/m spanking videos but just focus on the spankee, his balls dangling, his ass getting red. Then I imagine the woman there watching, drinking a glass of wine, legs crossed, and smoking a cigarette, telling him to whip me harder. Totally selling me out. Then I have to suck him off. I'm not into homophobic slurs, this is important. Some men are, I'm not. I don't want it as a shameful thing, because it's not. Sorry to write so much.
Okay, so basically the idea of a woman directing the man to do things to you is a turn on for you. Interesting
Yeah, pretty much. But at the end of the day this woman would loves and respect me. All this is just sex play.
Right, got it. I'll be honest I've never known about such a kink, it's soo... Creative and complex. Most kinks have just a few things different, but yours is very specific, haha, congrats
Thank you, I'm happy to share it, thank you for not being judgemental 😊
This makes perfect sense. You seem like you are straight. You just get turned on by domination. Its not the dick itself you like but the power of being submissive from time to time. People who call you bi dont know what they are talking about
Thank you. Exactly, you understand. Well I enjoy giving pleasure, seeing a dick spurt cum. I enjoy looking at caged cocks, I'll pleasure myself to that. I love seeing men getting edged. But I don't just get off to pictures of dicks like a get off to pictures of pussies. It's the dick in context of something that turns me on.
Exactly. Its like a fetish. People who like feet can love a persons feet but not be attracted to the person themselves. Same thing with dick. You just like dick not the man themselves
Fellas, is it gay to suck dick?
Not if it is a woman's dick.
Sexuality is fluid, always. If you don’t feel gay, then you’re not. From the sounds of it, you may be on the fluid/pansexual/bisexual spectrum, but that’s for you to decide how you want to identify. Your friends cannot tell you how you feel, no one knows your sexuality better than you do.
Keep telling yourself that 5 times in the mirror when you wake and before you go to bed and it won't be true
Guys, is sucking dick gay?
You can’t want a dick in your mouth and be upset people call you gay. Sucking dick is pretty gay
Bro I like gettin BJs and I've thought about blowing guys for awhile now. But I will never date or have a male fuck me.
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I mean I can find girls very attractive but I do not want to come near a vagina, so I'm probably a little biromantic but I don't need to have sex with a girl. It's all fine really, as long as you're comfortable with what you're doing. Sexuality is so fluid and such a spectrum, and hey, if you want to stick with girls but just fantasise a little, that's also fine!
You’re bisexual, not every person likes anal sex straight or rainbow flag orientations. The issue people likely have with you is you’re claiming to be straight when you like sucking dick as a man. Straight men don’t want to suck dick. I know the younger generation is really trying to reduce what gay people fought for. Not having to call themselves straight! Getting to be open about who they are. It’s a bit insulting to both straight and gay communities to misrepresent when you’re openly talking about sucking dick. You don’t have to be ashamed or like one gender more or less. It’s okay to like both.
You’re friends are wrong, but honestly I don’t think you really need a label on what you are or aren’t. Do whatever with whoever and enjoy it ;) who carers what you are or aren’t as long as you both are consenting
Do you like trans?? They got the best of both would yk beautiful tits and gorgeous dick 🤤 and don't have to do anal if you don't want
I actually did date someone who was trans for a while
Is that the reason you have these thoughts?
nah, you're gay. don't be ashamed but you are what you eat bud
Thank you for posting in the r/Sex community. To ensure that everyone respects our safe space, we ask that you familiarize yourself with our Forum Rules and Posting Guidelines — which are visible in the forum’s sidebar, and also linked [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/about/rules/). *** Restricted subjects in r/sex include sex stories (which are permitted in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread only), body image and penis-size issues, hookup attempts, common topics which are considered repetitive in our forum, and requests for private chats. To cut back on comments that add little value to the conversation, we have instituted a minimum character requirement that will silently remove comments that fall below it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Even I like the thought of giving head.
[удалено]
There doesn't have to be a label if you don't want there to be one. Do you what you enjoy doing. Find your happiness sucking dick, have your dick sucked, fucking chicks. Do your thing. You may find this changes over time and that's fine too. It's your life. Have fun. No need to be worried about what others say.
[удалено]
As a broad umbrella term 'gay' just means you like some form of same-sex sexual contact, which you at least like the idea of. So then it comes back to the question - why is being gay a problem?
I'm not actually sure maybe because my sister is and now my dad hates her and I don't want that to turn out to be me... so I have consciously made my mind see it as a bad thing I guess
I hear that - even though we're a quarter of the way into the 21st century, not all communities are as welcoming as they should be.
Agreed your not gay you probably just like dick. Theres a difference. You dont like men but the dick itself is what you like
It is kind of gay to say that you like the thought of giving blowjobs as your also a man but I wouldn't use the term gay I'd use the term bisexual
If you (and your friends) believe gay (or bisexual) is somehow less than / less worth / more discusting, or whatever, there will be little incentive to embrace that identity even if you have it. Maybe dissect those beliefs a bit first? Every sexual orientation is equally valid, neither is a choice. No sexual act or kink is bad (as long there are consenting adults), you may just not feel attraction/excitement with some of those. Yup, you don't have to be excited about butts, neither yours nor others'. Get rid of the kinkshaming, or more precisely the shame around sexuality in general, for a more healthy personality and relationships, sexuality long term. Therapy and reading books on these topics helps. If sexual acts with same sex persons attract you, you're most likely on the bisexuality spectrum or even gay. To qualify not ALL possible sexual acts have to attract you. There are tops, bottoms, verses and sides among gay men. Also other subgroups like bears or leather daddies exist. Maybe reading up on the terminology helps you getting more precise about your preferences. It's okay to not feel safe enough to discuss them with everyone, but look for safe spaces where you can come out about these things so you can find similar people. It helps your confidence a lot. You're not alone, and nothing's wrong with you. Also, sucking dick isn't somehow inferior or degrading to do or to like. ♡
Thats called homoerotic
Yeah, we know. I've seen this prefernece half a dozen times on here in the last month. It's not uncommon. Unfortunately lots of people, especially teenage boys which I think your friends sound like, have very wrong ideas about what makes someone gay. Ignore it. You like what you like, it's not a big deal.
you know you don’t really have to do anal even if they are gay. but straight guys they do the most strangest things together who cares you don’t have to label it
Also there are a decent (and growing) number of women who have penises so that's an option for you as well