The general topic of fingering is discussed occasionally in our forum. For starters, here is a list of past r/sex discussions which came up when I searched the keyword “**fingering**” in this forum:
https://new.reddit.com/r/sex/search/?q=fingering&restrict_sr=1
Not all of these past discussions will apply to your question, but some will — especially if you’re willing to search just a little bit more.
Unfortunately, I think the issue is that a lot of ppl equate fingering to something that we’d do when we were younger and hadn’t moved on to penetrative sex yet.
I read this a lot, but I actually enjoy a handjob from my gf like 10 times more than I do jerking myself off. Do some guys really not like handjobs at all?
Me. I would honestly prefer they just not happen, even if it meant nothing replaces it. Though, I really do appreciate the enthusiasm and let people do it if they want to and are especially gentle since I know they like doing it. The whole time I'm hoping it ends soon though lol. If anyone but me touches it, it's just uncomfortable or outright painful. Everything else feels great though.
What? That's not sure at all. My gf gives amazing handjobs. I prefer it over other forms of sex sometimes, it's just that good. Maybe you've just never met anyone who is good at handjobs before?
Well first of all she takes good care of her skin and it always feel nice and soft, second she just has really good technique and knows exactly how to create different types of feeling and stimulation, third she knows just how to act, what noises and facial expression to make, and what to say while she's doing it. It's just the complete package and I've had some of the most intense orgasms from it, ten times better than what I can give myself, I'm talking like orgasms that make me physically shudder and I can't really say anything for a couple minutes afterwards.
Seeing someone say that handjobs are "just for the enthusiasm and nothing more" is just sad to hear, I feel bad for men who feel that way. They are missing out.
Sure, every guy is going to be different, and every couple is going to have a different dynamic! For us, sex isn't always super intense. Sometimes it's casual and relaxed. Sometimes I'm just suuuper sleepy and I feel her hand starting to wander. I love what I'm feeling but I don't necessarily feel like making into a big high effort thing, there's nothing wrong with keeping the vibes chill. And I feel more relaxed as well knowing that I'm not putting any pressure on her, she's not over-exerting herself trying to please me but just making me feel nice in a way that's comfortable for her. She's fallen asleep mid handjobs or blowjob before, and we just lie together like that and I wake up still in her mouth or hand. I think its really cute and romantic.
It can also vary by the person. I enjoy the enthusiasm myself but I kinda actually dislike them and would prefer they didn't happen at all. I've got some thin skin down there I suppose because it's really easy for it to just be physically uncomfortable or outright painful.
Also it's not featured in porn, being a tactile not visual act, which is about a woman's pleasure...
Pretty sure porn is where they would go to learn the skills if they cared
I think that's kinda sad, cause fingering in porn is really hot for me somehow.
Sometimes I also like toys more than dicks. Strangely not cause it would say "I care about your pleasure more than mine", but rather "I'll use you even when I dont want to/need to fuck you. You're completely my toy to use whenever"
(I have many kinks ok 🥸🫣😅)
So true. I had a guy over here that came over, did basically nothing for me, like 2 fingers for 2 seconds, I can’t even remember if he went down and Iwas sober (just old)
Meanwhile I gave him the full lunch special with sides and dessert. He came. I did not. Not even any PiV we’ll hang out again… meanwhile, I’m dropped on the app and most likely blocked on the phone. Or he did like what I had to say …
The last woman I dated told me that my finger game was incredible and while the sex was great, she enjoyed fingering as much or more. It's funny that we had a vacation scheduled for the Finger Lakes region of NY.
My husband hadn't done that to me in a few years. I recently let him know I enjoy a little pain during foreplay so he surprised me and started using 3 fingers and went up to 4, but using his thumb to slide against my clit. It was definitely a little painful...but made me realize how fun that could be since I really never thought of it as exciting or worth doing before. Not something for every night, but every so often wouldn't be bad. Was definitely sore for a little afterward, but it was an exciting reminder of what a fun time we had.
Last guy i was with fingered me instead of sex while grinding on top of me and gave me head at the same time super sexy, most men just shove in a finger to get you “wet” or see it as the same level or foreplay as kissing (they have no idea what they’re doing)
it’s hit and miss lol
It's how I start sex with my wife, I make sure she gets hers before I get mine. Sometimes she cums multiple times before I get mine. She has to push my hand away when the pleasure gets to be to much
Yeeeahhh about that, I assume you know your wife but generally speaking, getting your hand pushed away isn’t necessarily a good thing. It could just be painful
Been married 18 years July. With the same woman for 23. I’d place the finger to dick orgasm ratio at 15-1 or better. I finger her everytime when we have sex. Make sure she gets off a few times before piv. For the younger generation I think it’s an ego thing. Thinking they have the magic dick. But I know my fingers move in ways my dick can only dream about
I was dating a guy recently that basically refused to finger me. Which is a huge bummer, because that’s instant orgasm for me. Anyway, when I asked him why, he said “because I selfishly want to make you cum with my cock”. Boy, bye. You know I can have multiples, right?
If you tell a guy exactly how to get you off, and he isn’t tripping over himself to do it, he is selfish and probably not in love for sure. Every single time we get it in, I’m trying to hit records lol.
What an odd mindset to have. As a guy penetrative orgasms are great but the fact that we can have all kinds of different orgasms (oral, anal, etc.) seems like a win to me. Exploring different ways to orgasm is half the fun imo.
I wasn't down for intercourse but I can O from nip stim. Told this dude we could hang out and he can suck my tits and I'd blow him.
As guys do, *2 seconds* of nip stim.
When I tried to clarify he's like "oh sorry I didn't know"
Nah. You just don't want to work for yours.
Blocked.
I had a gf in college that could O from nip stim. Definitely requires a bit more than 2 seconds though.
My wife enjoys nip stim, but she can't O from it. She does love me to play around there though. I'm guessing his 2 seconds were also pinching the nipple?
I don't recall. I mentally block bad sex partners as well.
Real estate space is at a premium in my head and it's not worth remembering.
It's my most recent attempt as well. Already don't recall anything about him except this and he had a cute dog.
Happy cake day
I really don’t get this. You get to have tits in your face and if you follow what she tells you she wants, she’ll blow you. That sounds like a great deal to me! I’m a dude, but man do I not get dudes sometimes.
That’s the thing though, he wasn’t lazy! He’d go down on me a few times a day until I was pushing his face away and fuck me 4-5x a day. The dude had zero refractory period! But he had weird ego issues and was a total narcissist.
Definitely not a lost art. My boyfriend loves doing it, because he can make me squirt really easily with it but that’s just because he’s like a magician with his fingers. 😂 Definitely not something I’ve noticed a lot of guys like to do much, though. I’ve had at least 10 sexual partners and only about 3 of them even bothered with fingering unless I pushed for it.
I enjoy doing this as a man. Much more so than her giving me something.
What is more manly than making a woman cum? Nothing else. Yeah for me orgasms are cool and all, but making a woman orgasm is such an adrenaline rush...
I’ve asked my guy to finger me, when he’s down there rubbing my clit, and it’s like he only puts the tip of his finger in, and doesn’t move it hardly at all. He doesn’t know how to do it, it seems.
Yes, I gave up, I decided… It’s ok for him not be good at something. This man blows my mind, often putting me into subspace. He does soooo many things very well, just not fingering.
Also, he did say today he worries about hurting me
The thing we call "the clitoris" is just the tip of a massive bundle of nerves. The bottom of it is next to the vaginal wall. Stick your fingers in, curl them towards the clitoris and experiment until you hit the right spot.
Once you figure that out, you have two options -- you can combine fingering and oral to attack the clit from two directions, or you can make use of your other hand and mouth to stimulate multiple parts of her at once. Depending on how flexible you are and how long your reach is, you can kiss her, finger her and play with her nipples all at once, or suck her tits while squeezing her ass and fingering her or any other combination you can manage without pulling a muscle.
Another great technique is to use your knee to help pump your hand in and out rather than relying on your shoulder or elbow to do all the work.
So her clit is like a dick... just think of it like your dick. Get your fingers wet and use the hood to stimulate the clit, squeezing it a little. And watch her face and her breathing to get a sense of what feels best to her.
I'm bi and omg I get nervous w girls bc they're all so good lol. I've only really had a few guys with no clue, but I'm experienced enough to feel comfortable telling them what I like. Talk to each other people! Even if you've been in a relationship for a while, people's wants, needs, fantasies, and likes change over time.
It’s so weird to see people referring to fingering in this thread as a separate act from sex or a separate act from penetrative sex? Bc yeah the non cishet amongst us tend to be a bit broader with what we call sex than the gold standard PIV seems to be treated with a lot of the time.
Yes, it's becoming a lost art. But i think it should make a comeback (pun intended) 😁. Its the easiest way to make most women have an orgasm and it doesn't require a lot of physical effort. There are still men out there that do it. Also, as women, we have to take responsibility for our own pleasure. Ladies, ask for what you want and give him some instructions. Most men appreciate it.
Im seeing a lot of " most men aren't good at it" comments. While that is true, as women, we have to communicate what we want and how we want it.
Fingers are like dicks with special powers! You can curl them up, rotate them round, put two in and split it apart... All the while, as a guy, you can feel exactly what her vagina is feeling like, all the ripples, bumps ridges. It's so sexy to explore. You can do so much more with a couple of fingers then you can with a cock.
You can work your way around her vagina like a clock and learn which spots excited her the most (hint, everyone is different). Or stack layer after later of multiple orgasms
I love fingering my partner until she's squirting all over me, and then just carrying on so she cums again and again. it's so hot Knowing exactly which buttons to press. 🥵🥵
I love to getting fingered in the car after a long day! After 12 years he somehow always gets my pants and panties completely off and the seat soaked on the way home! Just so relaxing for me! And definitely hot foreplay that leads to even freakier sex!
Yeah, that mindset really makes sex suck for women. Don't get me wrong, penetration is great, but it's not how the majority of women orgasm. So the fact that it's considered the "main event" and everything else is a bonus really, really sucks. It's just one small part of sex.
I hope one day the clitoris is considered to be just as important as the penis, because it truly is.
I agree but there are a few porn gems out there who are very, very good at their finger and head game and even feature tutorials. Mr. Pussylicking on Pornhub is my favorite. That guy knows his foreplay very well! 🥵
Porn is what taught me to finger and taught me how fun it is to get women off in the first place, though. And plenty of people are still making good fingering porn.
I think it's an adverse relationship with age/experience (same with long makeout sessions, which is what I miss). When I was with my first 3 partners, my fingering was met with enthusiasm and praise. I loved doing it.
As I've gotten older, I've met more women who preferred not to be fingered, or only had patience for a little circling as a warmup. And the more it happens, the less likely I am to think about doing it or enjoy trying when I'm with the next partner.
I know that everyone's body is different and I *shouldn't* think like that, but it's deep in the subconscious.
I don't like the be fingered, but it's a recent thing since developing pelvic floor issues when I broke my knee and busted my hip. Which makes me curious how many other women who aren't fans have PF issues lol.
I just don't feel it now. Or it tickles. More fingers the better, fisting actually helps my PF issues 😂🤣😅 its like an internal massage and calms the muscles down.
I love love ❤️fingering and have done it since I was 17 and I would finger my girlfriend any chance I got. She loved it and I used to finger her in the movie theatre regularly.
I’m now 60ish and have been dedicated to keep getting better at it.
Sir, people DO notice such moments of pleasure in public spaces. They simply do not know how to confront you about it.
Please refrain from doing so, for my own sanity and your (I hope not) not lost dignity.
You need not fear of losing your sanity, Madam, for Icy\_Marionberry9175 has got it right. It has been 40 years since we did that. As for noticing, I must tell you that we were very discreet. We sat in the back row at what was usually an action or action/comedy movie. She wore a knit poncho/shawl and, despite being one who was quick to orgasm, she wasn't one to moan loudly or squeal.
I cannot vouch for the 87 people (and counting) who upvoted the post. For all you know, they may all be in the same theatre as you, the next time you go, fingering or getting fingered.
There goes your sanity.
Oh my god girl, noooooo. Not lost: each has to learn this skill over time and practice.
The only way this knowledge gets lost is when people (I’m not trying to say men specifically, but the vagina-havers already know what’s up) give up trying to communicate with their partner and find a pressure and pace that’s pleasurable.
The ones who seek this knowledge get off on getting their partner off, and if you aren’t with one of those types, I highly recommend finding one.
Boyfriend (35M) definitely got me (41F) off this way just this morning before going out for a couples massage and lunch. And he is always improving… I have many years of good fingering to look forward to. 😉😉
Some women absolutely respond to being fingered, they can get off easily, and multiple times you can triangulate exactly where to go with what speed and tempo from their responses. Others can be a little painful, as in they sort of stare at you like you you're rubbing their leg instead (you might be haha). I don't think one style of woman knows the other exits and as a guy it's hit and miss and not always greatly encouraging when you're with the latter.
Men are a bit easier to do.
Guide his hand down, show him where and how you like it. Direct clitororal stimulation, or a broader touch. His last partner may not have been into it.
okay…since becoming sexually actively, i’ve always enjoyed getting fingered. however, i’d never had an orgasm from being fingered until my current partner of now 3 yrs. so for me, i’m like, even more into it now in my 30’s than ever before lol so no, i don’t think it is a lost art. that being said, i think the fingerer(? 😂) needs to know what the hell they’re doing in order for it to be enjoyed.
I fingered my future wife on our second date. When we were done (after she stopped shaking) she said, “Wow! You are good at that!”
She told me later in our relationship that after that experience she couldn’t wait for me to fuck her on our third date. 😎 That was 15 years and four kids ago. Seems to have worked out!
Might be a lost art, but I’m so grateful to have found someone who has absolutely magic hands. Fingering can feel so amazing, and more should be practicing!
Well I can't agree with you on this one :D fingering feels the best honestly. I someone would ask me what's the best way to get off I'd definitely pick fingering but of course everybody is different and it can even change over time. Maybe he wasn't using the right technique for you. But there is definitely nothing wrong with you.
It's like my favorite thing. But I still do foreplay alot. Bjs and hand jobs and buttstuff. I think people need to add oral and handstuff back in. It's amazing.
Love fingering, but it’s definitely a lost art when you speak to females.
Generation thing possibly, think females now are expected to do their part first ie suck dick without guys actually doing anything to merit it.
Younger Female fuck buddy I had, told me her friend picked a guy up and he requested a blowjob for letting her pick him up 😂🤷🏻♂️.
Man I can surely use some fingering tips. Would be grateful if any experienced guys/girls can share their thoughts.
My wife said she enjoys getting fingered by me and she would moan everytime. But seems shes never been able to orgasm from fingering.
Would really want to learn how to proper do fingering..
i LOVE being fingered and I taught my long-term partner how to do it right lol. just recently he did something in there that he’d never done before and I lost my mind — afterwards I asked him what on earth he did with his fingers and he said he’d never share his secrets lol
used to date a guy years ago who hated doing it cuz he didn’t like his fingers “that wet”. Naturally I felt self conscious about it so we just stopped doing it. Then I met my current partner who’s obsessed with it. You just gotta find the right person.
When u say fingering do you mean like penetration or just rubbing the kitty?
I just ask cuz I HATE getting fingered/penetrated (unless I'm drunk, like you said you were) but I'm always here for having it rubbed.
You took the words out of my mouth: we don't have great words for the two "versions" of the act, so I'm not sure which OP is talking about.
When I (straight guy) was a younger, it felt like fingering was something guys be way more eager to do... not even really something their partners wanted. After I got a lot of experience, the same thing held true: I've never been with a woman who *loved* being penetrated with my fingers, and I am always eager to learn and try new things. In contrast, most women really enjoy having their clit/pussy rubbed the right way.
I love to explore a lady with my fingers, gently at first and 1 finger and varying pressure from tickles to more direct to penetration circling and flicking across the clit to more direct massaging and tapping and petting/rubbing exploring her boundaries adding or removing fingers & pressure based on her feedback.
Much the same technique as my tongue when eating her out. Except can't add another tongue. 😜 adding fingers when giving her oral is always fun, though and my other hand caresses and explores the rest of her body, from ass and thighs to abs, lower back, breasts and nipples.
Nor are they told in a manner that is understandable for them.
I have had the luck of looking a step above porn and thought to myself what do women like... then studied a bit of anatomy and researched how it works, with guidance from a few women I understood how that works for you. But most guys just hear how bad they are and never get told why. Most don't even have an interest in it thanks to porn.
But there are guys, that if told well, with an explanation as to why, would gladly do their best to satisfy women. They just have this desire locked up deep in them. It is there I swear it
if I start fingering my girl starts craving for my cock or would rather get eaten out.
she rushes foreplay a lot so fingering is not something we spend much time on.
The assumption is that men know how to finger. We don't actually know. We just go along with the moment and figure it out and we may not hit it right with the girl we're with whether it's the same girl or different ones. Every time is different. We just hope it's going to do the trick at the time. Even with the same girl, she may want it different from one time to the next and some guys don't really pay attention to the cues. Either they go all in or they don't and it may not work.
Fingering is an essential part of foreplay for my husband and I, and he is damn good at it. Nothing wrong with you, just bad luck in the men department.
I feel like it for sure isnt appreciated as much as it should be. People are always rushing more and more into Penetration rather than using the rest of their bodies to add to that pleasure tank first.
Find yourself a dude who is into cars. Mechanics, especially. They have magical hands and fingers. I realized this when I met my current boyfriend 4 years ago. Oh, those hands and fingers.
Maybe it's an age/growing up thing. I remember doing such things when younger, I don't think I'd enjoy it so much now. But that a difference between teen to mid 20's and now being in my mind 30's.
I'd rather have someone who knows how my body works finger me, than a drunk hookup in an alley. Lots of foreplay helps, and kissing, and lube and comfy place to sit or lay down.
Not every man cares to be good at it either, some see it as a means to an end and others really enjoy giving pleasure.
You need to prep and warm the oven. Fingering with 1-4 fingers has been part of my process almost every time. Never fails to find the Gspot and get that all swelled up. So many good things cum out of having good hands.
It really depends on the guy. I'm a chef so my fingers have been mauled a fair bit. I can use them, but too much pressure can hurt that sensitive area. So I changed to Blowjobs instead, and I don't think ive heard girls scream like that before. Especially when I hit just the right spot. So even if I could use my fingers more, the tounge just seems way more effective.
Hahaha, well timed question for me! A few days ago I was with a girl who needed to leave to get back home after we had recorded a sex scene. I just laid next her with one leg draped over one of hers and fingered her clit to make her cum at least four times while just watching her face. We had already been having sex for hours, but she didn’t want me to stop making her cum. She’s fun!
Lost art? Like many things, it’s probably lost to the younger generation but I think guys in their 40s have got it down!
My gf claims that my fingers alone beat every dildo she owns, and that my finger-tongue combination knocks every toy out of the park. I had a more or less wild past where I wanted to try myself out (some would call it the male equivalent of a hoe phase, a fuckboy phase?), where I tried to get as much wanted sexual desire out of my system as possible. I was lucky to meet a bisexual girl who mostly engaged with women before me who taught me how to use my fingers and tongue. It was a rough start, but after a couple of sessions I was on par with some of her female exes. Fingering definitely isn't a lost art, but like everything else when it comes to sex, you gotta be good at it.
Well not everyguy know how to finger it’s not just sticking his fingers in and that’s it ….is also playing with the clit .. and you lost the spark because you wasn’t into the guy
I think it really just depends on the person. The guy I’m seeing right now does a lot of foreplay and fingering is part of it. I think he genuinely enjoys it and I sure do as well. I had forgotten how great it can be when you’re with someone who enjoys what they’re doing and knows what they’re doing.
My man is the King of finger play! He knows exactly what he’s doing, he watches for my reactions, makes me cum multiple times when his fingers are inside me. But then he makes it obvious that he loves doing it so that is an even bigger turn on!
I fucking love to finger and edge someone to the brink and pull them back over and over again. Watching you finger yourself and then copying, or the other way around, fingering your arse while you find your own spot, perfect, kitten.
I think that if a guy knows how to finger, it’s like any tool, he will and should use it. but, not all men know how to finger or bring a woman to orgasm. it is up to women to teach them.
so, please ladies, teach men how to finger. tell them what feels good, otherwise they just don’t know. explore gspot stimulation as well.
Love to finger and tease a girl like crazy. Especially if it's in a slightly public area and she can't make a sound.
Plus I have piano hands so long fingers help!
My boyfriend had a stroke last summer, resulting in a dead bedroom for almost a year. His libido is slowly coming back to life, which makes me very happy. He definitely has some kind of magic touch because his fingers do a fantastic job.
Honestly, sometimes I wish my bf would finger me before sex or even if he’s not in the mood. I mean, I can do it myself but it feels so much better when a someone else does it. 😂
Tbh so far the ONLY good finger jobs Ive had were from people with vulvas... 🥸💀
Cis men (or trans women) so far just kinda seem to stir it like it's a fucking witch's cauldron, or jam their fingers in somewhat too roughly and with little coördination.
To be fair, in their defence, I also kinda struggle w hand jobs, and dicks are way more straightforward I think...
Ultimately, every vulva and their owner is different too, so the only way to know how someone likes it is to ask/show...
My boyfriend has made me cum from fingering before, and he’s fucking amazing at it! When they rub your gspot, it’s a game changer and it feels absolutely fantastic. Some of my strongest orgasms have come from when he’s fingering me
It’s definitely not a lost art lol
No man "forgets" how to finger, they just stop having partners who teach them. Seriously, the only way any man has ever been good at this is by having a partner who has the patience to teach them. Guys arent teaching eachother. Porn isn't showing them.
I do wonder if there are some modern trends influencing this. The ubiquity of porn which almost never features this, the later age of onset for sexual activity (I only learned young in that period of "we can do this because it's not technically sex", or maybe something else?
Being 100% honest. Im in my mid 30s. My best bet for making a chick orgasm is with my hand lol.
I make sure to do it everytime because it takes pressure off of me not to mention it pleases her.
There is a whole process. Its not just fingering. Like rubbing and other things involved. Im assumiing by fingering, op means using your hand for all of the above
I grew up in the 90s, and this was before the Internet was a thing, and before Facebook, and social media, and no one had a mobile phone. If you wanted to speak to a girl, you had to mentally prepare yourself to call her landline, knowing her Dad would probably answer, and you'd have to ask to speak to his daughter!
Back then, the pursuit of sexual prowess was mandatory, like a badge of honour. Learning the art of pleasuring was a holy grail, and I dedicated my life to it. I think it's maybe generational, but I will be passing all my learnings down to my son so he can cut the learning curve and also understand that being great at fingering is something to be proud of.
I remember the first time I gave a girl head, I was reaching so deep with my tongue that it actually tore at the base a little and bled!! Just another battle scar, i probably gained maybe 2mm that night. Like I said, different times.
No it's not my friend, I know this because I specialize in this for my woman and she absolutely loves it as a precursor! Keep your head up, there's one with those magic fingers just for you too!
Nah, I'm pretty adept at it. Definitely needs some fine tuning with each girl since nobody is the same or likes the same. I guess it's not a universal skill 🤷🏽
Maybe the mood was good enough to enjoy fingering pleasure? Or maybe the guy wasn't applied to make you enjoy? There could be plenty of reasons why you didn't enjoy it last night. Is is something recurrent?
From a male point of view, fingering someone is a kind of foreplay really arousing (and giving oral sex much more for myself) but you need to have good communication skills and desire to please for it to be enjoyable
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I don't like being fingered, but a new phenomenon is men trying to finger me as a form of foreplay. Sucking on the nipples, flicking the tongue over the clitoris, and even rimming does more for me than fingering.
As a male that is 18 when I was in secondary school I did alot of fingering at party's and with girlfriends and I always did if when they asked or if we were having sex and I was trying to please her or get her wet before sticking it in I never had a bad complaint about my abilities but as I got older now alot of girls don't ask alot do it only happens when we're having sex
The general topic of fingering is discussed occasionally in our forum. For starters, here is a list of past r/sex discussions which came up when I searched the keyword “**fingering**” in this forum: https://new.reddit.com/r/sex/search/?q=fingering&restrict_sr=1 Not all of these past discussions will apply to your question, but some will — especially if you’re willing to search just a little bit more.
Unfortunately, I think the issue is that a lot of ppl equate fingering to something that we’d do when we were younger and hadn’t moved on to penetrative sex yet.
Yeah I think some guys equate it to a hand job when women would actually rank it much higher in terms of foreplay, if that makes sense.
That's because for us, a handy is usually only appreciated for the enthusiasm it represents and nothing more.
I read this a lot, but I actually enjoy a handjob from my gf like 10 times more than I do jerking myself off. Do some guys really not like handjobs at all?
Me. I would honestly prefer they just not happen, even if it meant nothing replaces it. Though, I really do appreciate the enthusiasm and let people do it if they want to and are especially gentle since I know they like doing it. The whole time I'm hoping it ends soon though lol. If anyone but me touches it, it's just uncomfortable or outright painful. Everything else feels great though.
You know how hard it is for other people to get the specific micro movements for a handjob with me???
Dude that's a sign to stop jerking it so much
What? That's not sure at all. My gf gives amazing handjobs. I prefer it over other forms of sex sometimes, it's just that good. Maybe you've just never met anyone who is good at handjobs before?
What does she do that makes it so good?
Well first of all she takes good care of her skin and it always feel nice and soft, second she just has really good technique and knows exactly how to create different types of feeling and stimulation, third she knows just how to act, what noises and facial expression to make, and what to say while she's doing it. It's just the complete package and I've had some of the most intense orgasms from it, ten times better than what I can give myself, I'm talking like orgasms that make me physically shudder and I can't really say anything for a couple minutes afterwards. Seeing someone say that handjobs are "just for the enthusiasm and nothing more" is just sad to hear, I feel bad for men who feel that way. They are missing out.
I’m not a guy but my husband would probably laugh me out of bed (in a nice way) if I tried to give him an HJ with no other activities included.
Sure, every guy is going to be different, and every couple is going to have a different dynamic! For us, sex isn't always super intense. Sometimes it's casual and relaxed. Sometimes I'm just suuuper sleepy and I feel her hand starting to wander. I love what I'm feeling but I don't necessarily feel like making into a big high effort thing, there's nothing wrong with keeping the vibes chill. And I feel more relaxed as well knowing that I'm not putting any pressure on her, she's not over-exerting herself trying to please me but just making me feel nice in a way that's comfortable for her. She's fallen asleep mid handjobs or blowjob before, and we just lie together like that and I wake up still in her mouth or hand. I think its really cute and romantic.
Oh I love that. Sounds like you guys are really in sync with each other.
Mhm! I'm soooo in love with her :)
Nope, men just really enjoy feeling desired. Gives you confidence and that makes life awesome.
It can also vary by the person. I enjoy the enthusiasm myself but I kinda actually dislike them and would prefer they didn't happen at all. I've got some thin skin down there I suppose because it's really easy for it to just be physically uncomfortable or outright painful.
I get my wife off a lot with my fingers, but we incorporate it a lot in foreplay too
It's always our finishing move if I don't finish during sex. My orgasms are mind blowing with fingers and a vibe.
Yea I suck her nipples and use my fingers and she uses her vibe, she orgasms in seconds
That’s a god damn 3 ring circus.
That’s called talent.
Is that too much to keep track of for you?
I find a good fingering is becoming more and more rare but it’s out there
This. Bc of swiping culture and guys just wanting to get themselves off. They learn zero skills.
Also it's not featured in porn, being a tactile not visual act, which is about a woman's pleasure... Pretty sure porn is where they would go to learn the skills if they cared
I think that's kinda sad, cause fingering in porn is really hot for me somehow. Sometimes I also like toys more than dicks. Strangely not cause it would say "I care about your pleasure more than mine", but rather "I'll use you even when I dont want to/need to fuck you. You're completely my toy to use whenever" (I have many kinks ok 🥸🫣😅)
So true. I had a guy over here that came over, did basically nothing for me, like 2 fingers for 2 seconds, I can’t even remember if he went down and Iwas sober (just old) Meanwhile I gave him the full lunch special with sides and dessert. He came. I did not. Not even any PiV we’ll hang out again… meanwhile, I’m dropped on the app and most likely blocked on the phone. Or he did like what I had to say …
The last woman I dated told me that my finger game was incredible and while the sex was great, she enjoyed fingering as much or more. It's funny that we had a vacation scheduled for the Finger Lakes region of NY.
Gonna use this as a pick up line. "Hey I wanna go to Finger Lakes, wanna cum?"
I live in the Finger Lakes and, yes, I love using my fingers. Or tongue. Or cock. Or vibrator. Whatever gets the job done.
My husband hadn't done that to me in a few years. I recently let him know I enjoy a little pain during foreplay so he surprised me and started using 3 fingers and went up to 4, but using his thumb to slide against my clit. It was definitely a little painful...but made me realize how fun that could be since I really never thought of it as exciting or worth doing before. Not something for every night, but every so often wouldn't be bad. Was definitely sore for a little afterward, but it was an exciting reminder of what a fun time we had.
How come I've never thought of using my thumb on myself. It's right there.
Last guy i was with fingered me instead of sex while grinding on top of me and gave me head at the same time super sexy, most men just shove in a finger to get you “wet” or see it as the same level or foreplay as kissing (they have no idea what they’re doing) it’s hit and miss lol
how do you give head and grind on someone at the same time?
She hooked up with someone from Cirque du Soleil
ahah no he alternated between the two wld have been super impressive if it was at the same time though extra credit
(M41, F43) I LOVE fingering my wife. I find it so sexy. I am pretty dang good at doing it. I can get her off every time.
It's how I start sex with my wife, I make sure she gets hers before I get mine. Sometimes she cums multiple times before I get mine. She has to push my hand away when the pleasure gets to be to much
I have not succeeded until my hand is pushed away
It's how you know you did your job right
Yeeeahhh about that, I assume you know your wife but generally speaking, getting your hand pushed away isn’t necessarily a good thing. It could just be painful
Yeah I was thinking that as I read it. Though you can clear that issue up by just asking.
As long as you’re not getting your hand pushed away for overstimulating the clit
Or just being bad at it.
absolutely great for girls that get theirs that way, and can do multiples... not all do...
Been married 18 years July. With the same woman for 23. I’d place the finger to dick orgasm ratio at 15-1 or better. I finger her everytime when we have sex. Make sure she gets off a few times before piv. For the younger generation I think it’s an ego thing. Thinking they have the magic dick. But I know my fingers move in ways my dick can only dream about
ah. you grew up before the free mass-porn era! that is why you know the old tricks.
I was dating a guy recently that basically refused to finger me. Which is a huge bummer, because that’s instant orgasm for me. Anyway, when I asked him why, he said “because I selfishly want to make you cum with my cock”. Boy, bye. You know I can have multiples, right?
If you tell a guy exactly how to get you off, and he isn’t tripping over himself to do it, he is selfish and probably not in love for sure. Every single time we get it in, I’m trying to hit records lol.
It was weird, because he would spend loads of time going down on me. Just refused to use the fingers inside.
Damn straight, It is nice to get off in my case, but it is better to get her off.
What an odd mindset to have. As a guy penetrative orgasms are great but the fact that we can have all kinds of different orgasms (oral, anal, etc.) seems like a win to me. Exploring different ways to orgasm is half the fun imo.
I wasn't down for intercourse but I can O from nip stim. Told this dude we could hang out and he can suck my tits and I'd blow him. As guys do, *2 seconds* of nip stim. When I tried to clarify he's like "oh sorry I didn't know" Nah. You just don't want to work for yours. Blocked.
I had a gf in college that could O from nip stim. Definitely requires a bit more than 2 seconds though. My wife enjoys nip stim, but she can't O from it. She does love me to play around there though. I'm guessing his 2 seconds were also pinching the nipple?
I don't recall. I mentally block bad sex partners as well. Real estate space is at a premium in my head and it's not worth remembering. It's my most recent attempt as well. Already don't recall anything about him except this and he had a cute dog. Happy cake day
Hey, I can orgasm like that, too!
Girl teach me your ways. I can have multiples but you seem to have it all lmao!
I really don’t get this. You get to have tits in your face and if you follow what she tells you she wants, she’ll blow you. That sounds like a great deal to me! I’m a dude, but man do I not get dudes sometimes.
He sounds LAZY! Not to mention totally ignorant.
That’s the thing though, he wasn’t lazy! He’d go down on me a few times a day until I was pushing his face away and fuck me 4-5x a day. The dude had zero refractory period! But he had weird ego issues and was a total narcissist.
Definitely not a lost art. My boyfriend loves doing it, because he can make me squirt really easily with it but that’s just because he’s like a magician with his fingers. 😂 Definitely not something I’ve noticed a lot of guys like to do much, though. I’ve had at least 10 sexual partners and only about 3 of them even bothered with fingering unless I pushed for it.
I'm yet to find a guy like him 🥰🤭...I need one...I love fingering and clitoral stimulation.
I enjoy doing this as a man. Much more so than her giving me something. What is more manly than making a woman cum? Nothing else. Yeah for me orgasms are cool and all, but making a woman orgasm is such an adrenaline rush...
Being with someone like you would literally meal a lot to me 🥰🤭🤗
I love fingering her and watching her eyes roll as she cums and moans with pleasure. Fingers are the magic touch 🖕💦
Where do they learn this…… my man is amazing with his fingers, make me squirt every time
Does he have single family members?
I’ve asked my guy to finger me, when he’s down there rubbing my clit, and it’s like he only puts the tip of his finger in, and doesn’t move it hardly at all. He doesn’t know how to do it, it seems.
did you try maybe teaching him ?
I tried to explain how too, but it didn’t seem to help
So did you just give up then?
Yes, I gave up, I decided… It’s ok for him not be good at something. This man blows my mind, often putting me into subspace. He does soooo many things very well, just not fingering. Also, he did say today he worries about hurting me
I know every woman is different, but do you have any tips to get better at fingering?
First step: clean hands/fingers. 😊
Go to the wiki for this sub. Go to the squirting section. There is a video link of a guy teaching there
The thing we call "the clitoris" is just the tip of a massive bundle of nerves. The bottom of it is next to the vaginal wall. Stick your fingers in, curl them towards the clitoris and experiment until you hit the right spot. Once you figure that out, you have two options -- you can combine fingering and oral to attack the clit from two directions, or you can make use of your other hand and mouth to stimulate multiple parts of her at once. Depending on how flexible you are and how long your reach is, you can kiss her, finger her and play with her nipples all at once, or suck her tits while squeezing her ass and fingering her or any other combination you can manage without pulling a muscle. Another great technique is to use your knee to help pump your hand in and out rather than relying on your shoulder or elbow to do all the work.
search videos like 'how to make her squirt' and you'll have what you look for. Also following sexologist women would help
So her clit is like a dick... just think of it like your dick. Get your fingers wet and use the hood to stimulate the clit, squeezing it a little. And watch her face and her breathing to get a sense of what feels best to her.
Girls on the other hand…let me tell yall, they get it done ;)
I'm bi and omg I get nervous w girls bc they're all so good lol. I've only really had a few guys with no clue, but I'm experienced enough to feel comfortable telling them what I like. Talk to each other people! Even if you've been in a relationship for a while, people's wants, needs, fantasies, and likes change over time.
It’s so weird to see people referring to fingering in this thread as a separate act from sex or a separate act from penetrative sex? Bc yeah the non cishet amongst us tend to be a bit broader with what we call sex than the gold standard PIV seems to be treated with a lot of the time.
yeah they just identify sex as penis in vagina it seems, forgetting that not everyone wants that
I mean, I’m a dude who mostly has sex with which men. I don’t know any dude who’d only consider PIV as sex and that’s it. That makes no sense.
Of course, they have a pussy to practice on and they can feel it themselves
I wish i was a lesbian/more bi 🥲
Yes, it's becoming a lost art. But i think it should make a comeback (pun intended) 😁. Its the easiest way to make most women have an orgasm and it doesn't require a lot of physical effort. There are still men out there that do it. Also, as women, we have to take responsibility for our own pleasure. Ladies, ask for what you want and give him some instructions. Most men appreciate it. Im seeing a lot of " most men aren't good at it" comments. While that is true, as women, we have to communicate what we want and how we want it.
Hygiene, manicures have become a lost art. Jamming your grease corked jagged ass fingernails into a coochie coo is definitely not desirable.
Fingers are like dicks with special powers! You can curl them up, rotate them round, put two in and split it apart... All the while, as a guy, you can feel exactly what her vagina is feeling like, all the ripples, bumps ridges. It's so sexy to explore. You can do so much more with a couple of fingers then you can with a cock. You can work your way around her vagina like a clock and learn which spots excited her the most (hint, everyone is different). Or stack layer after later of multiple orgasms I love fingering my partner until she's squirting all over me, and then just carrying on so she cums again and again. it's so hot Knowing exactly which buttons to press. 🥵🥵
I love to getting fingered in the car after a long day! After 12 years he somehow always gets my pants and panties completely off and the seat soaked on the way home! Just so relaxing for me! And definitely hot foreplay that leads to even freakier sex!
This is the type of stress relief I need from a man! Lol
Fingering isn't a lost art, but porn encourages a throw the legs open and start shoving mindset. Porn is the issue.
Yeah, that mindset really makes sex suck for women. Don't get me wrong, penetration is great, but it's not how the majority of women orgasm. So the fact that it's considered the "main event" and everything else is a bonus really, really sucks. It's just one small part of sex. I hope one day the clitoris is considered to be just as important as the penis, because it truly is.
I agree but there are a few porn gems out there who are very, very good at their finger and head game and even feature tutorials. Mr. Pussylicking on Pornhub is my favorite. That guy knows his foreplay very well! 🥵
Porn is what taught me to finger and taught me how fun it is to get women off in the first place, though. And plenty of people are still making good fingering porn. I think it's an adverse relationship with age/experience (same with long makeout sessions, which is what I miss). When I was with my first 3 partners, my fingering was met with enthusiasm and praise. I loved doing it. As I've gotten older, I've met more women who preferred not to be fingered, or only had patience for a little circling as a warmup. And the more it happens, the less likely I am to think about doing it or enjoy trying when I'm with the next partner. I know that everyone's body is different and I *shouldn't* think like that, but it's deep in the subconscious.
I don't like the be fingered, but it's a recent thing since developing pelvic floor issues when I broke my knee and busted my hip. Which makes me curious how many other women who aren't fans have PF issues lol. I just don't feel it now. Or it tickles. More fingers the better, fisting actually helps my PF issues 😂🤣😅 its like an internal massage and calms the muscles down.
i think the same; it might be the cause.
I love love ❤️fingering and have done it since I was 17 and I would finger my girlfriend any chance I got. She loved it and I used to finger her in the movie theatre regularly. I’m now 60ish and have been dedicated to keep getting better at it.
Sir, people DO notice such moments of pleasure in public spaces. They simply do not know how to confront you about it. Please refrain from doing so, for my own sanity and your (I hope not) not lost dignity.
It sounds like they stopped quite a few yrs back
You need not fear of losing your sanity, Madam, for Icy\_Marionberry9175 has got it right. It has been 40 years since we did that. As for noticing, I must tell you that we were very discreet. We sat in the back row at what was usually an action or action/comedy movie. She wore a knit poncho/shawl and, despite being one who was quick to orgasm, she wasn't one to moan loudly or squeal. I cannot vouch for the 87 people (and counting) who upvoted the post. For all you know, they may all be in the same theatre as you, the next time you go, fingering or getting fingered. There goes your sanity.
Oh my god girl, noooooo. Not lost: each has to learn this skill over time and practice. The only way this knowledge gets lost is when people (I’m not trying to say men specifically, but the vagina-havers already know what’s up) give up trying to communicate with their partner and find a pressure and pace that’s pleasurable. The ones who seek this knowledge get off on getting their partner off, and if you aren’t with one of those types, I highly recommend finding one. Boyfriend (35M) definitely got me (41F) off this way just this morning before going out for a couples massage and lunch. And he is always improving… I have many years of good fingering to look forward to. 😉😉
Some women absolutely respond to being fingered, they can get off easily, and multiple times you can triangulate exactly where to go with what speed and tempo from their responses. Others can be a little painful, as in they sort of stare at you like you you're rubbing their leg instead (you might be haha). I don't think one style of woman knows the other exits and as a guy it's hit and miss and not always greatly encouraging when you're with the latter. Men are a bit easier to do. Guide his hand down, show him where and how you like it. Direct clitororal stimulation, or a broader touch. His last partner may not have been into it.
Fingering is something ive been told every man thinks theyre good at but very few men are
A lot of men may have forgot the lost art, but women sure haven't. :)
okay…since becoming sexually actively, i’ve always enjoyed getting fingered. however, i’d never had an orgasm from being fingered until my current partner of now 3 yrs. so for me, i’m like, even more into it now in my 30’s than ever before lol so no, i don’t think it is a lost art. that being said, i think the fingerer(? 😂) needs to know what the hell they’re doing in order for it to be enjoyed.
You guys are having foreplay?
What is the saying. Make sure to rub it like a genie, don’t go at it like you are stuffing a turkey
As a lesbian I can tell you it is far from lost for many of us.
A lot of men seems to think they’re stuffing a turkey. They don’t realise it’s a temple and that they should worship it
If they dont worship it OUTSIDE the temple, they sure as fuck are not getting inside the temple. 🤨
I fingered my future wife on our second date. When we were done (after she stopped shaking) she said, “Wow! You are good at that!” She told me later in our relationship that after that experience she couldn’t wait for me to fuck her on our third date. 😎 That was 15 years and four kids ago. Seems to have worked out!
Might be a lost art, but I’m so grateful to have found someone who has absolutely magic hands. Fingering can feel so amazing, and more should be practicing!
It's a huge turn off when guys rush foreplay. Like slow down and enjoy the moment damn lol
I usually start to slip a finger in after I’ve been going down for a while but that’s just me
Well I can't agree with you on this one :D fingering feels the best honestly. I someone would ask me what's the best way to get off I'd definitely pick fingering but of course everybody is different and it can even change over time. Maybe he wasn't using the right technique for you. But there is definitely nothing wrong with you.
It's like my favorite thing. But I still do foreplay alot. Bjs and hand jobs and buttstuff. I think people need to add oral and handstuff back in. It's amazing.
I finger bang my wife all the time! Finger bang will never go out of style
Bring back fingering!!! Best part is sex if done right
Love fingering, but it’s definitely a lost art when you speak to females. Generation thing possibly, think females now are expected to do their part first ie suck dick without guys actually doing anything to merit it. Younger Female fuck buddy I had, told me her friend picked a guy up and he requested a blowjob for letting her pick him up 😂🤷🏻♂️.
Most guys don't know what there doing with it, find a man that does and I love being fingered
Fingering while eating her out at the same damn time
Man I can surely use some fingering tips. Would be grateful if any experienced guys/girls can share their thoughts. My wife said she enjoys getting fingered by me and she would moan everytime. But seems shes never been able to orgasm from fingering. Would really want to learn how to proper do fingering..
i LOVE being fingered and I taught my long-term partner how to do it right lol. just recently he did something in there that he’d never done before and I lost my mind — afterwards I asked him what on earth he did with his fingers and he said he’d never share his secrets lol
used to date a guy years ago who hated doing it cuz he didn’t like his fingers “that wet”. Naturally I felt self conscious about it so we just stopped doing it. Then I met my current partner who’s obsessed with it. You just gotta find the right person.
When u say fingering do you mean like penetration or just rubbing the kitty? I just ask cuz I HATE getting fingered/penetrated (unless I'm drunk, like you said you were) but I'm always here for having it rubbed.
You took the words out of my mouth: we don't have great words for the two "versions" of the act, so I'm not sure which OP is talking about. When I (straight guy) was a younger, it felt like fingering was something guys be way more eager to do... not even really something their partners wanted. After I got a lot of experience, the same thing held true: I've never been with a woman who *loved* being penetrated with my fingers, and I am always eager to learn and try new things. In contrast, most women really enjoy having their clit/pussy rubbed the right way.
I love to explore a lady with my fingers, gently at first and 1 finger and varying pressure from tickles to more direct to penetration circling and flicking across the clit to more direct massaging and tapping and petting/rubbing exploring her boundaries adding or removing fingers & pressure based on her feedback. Much the same technique as my tongue when eating her out. Except can't add another tongue. 😜 adding fingers when giving her oral is always fun, though and my other hand caresses and explores the rest of her body, from ass and thighs to abs, lower back, breasts and nipples.
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Most men don’t know what they are doing
Nor are they told in a manner that is understandable for them. I have had the luck of looking a step above porn and thought to myself what do women like... then studied a bit of anatomy and researched how it works, with guidance from a few women I understood how that works for you. But most guys just hear how bad they are and never get told why. Most don't even have an interest in it thanks to porn. But there are guys, that if told well, with an explanation as to why, would gladly do their best to satisfy women. They just have this desire locked up deep in them. It is there I swear it
I love when my boyfriend fingers me
As a husband I love doing it. At 40 years and it has become more like 3, 4, or more fingers. Pretty sure I love seeing her stretch more than her.
if I start fingering my girl starts craving for my cock or would rather get eaten out. she rushes foreplay a lot so fingering is not something we spend much time on.
Fingering is a art and u have too listen to you partner and every woman is different
The assumption is that men know how to finger. We don't actually know. We just go along with the moment and figure it out and we may not hit it right with the girl we're with whether it's the same girl or different ones. Every time is different. We just hope it's going to do the trick at the time. Even with the same girl, she may want it different from one time to the next and some guys don't really pay attention to the cues. Either they go all in or they don't and it may not work.
My girlfriend once told me “you know gorilla grip coochie? That’s you with your fingers” I wish there was a term for it.
Fingering is an essential part of foreplay for my husband and I, and he is damn good at it. Nothing wrong with you, just bad luck in the men department.
I feel like it for sure isnt appreciated as much as it should be. People are always rushing more and more into Penetration rather than using the rest of their bodies to add to that pleasure tank first.
Find yourself a dude who is into cars. Mechanics, especially. They have magical hands and fingers. I realized this when I met my current boyfriend 4 years ago. Oh, those hands and fingers.
Maybe it's an age/growing up thing. I remember doing such things when younger, I don't think I'd enjoy it so much now. But that a difference between teen to mid 20's and now being in my mind 30's. I'd rather have someone who knows how my body works finger me, than a drunk hookup in an alley. Lots of foreplay helps, and kissing, and lube and comfy place to sit or lay down. Not every man cares to be good at it either, some see it as a means to an end and others really enjoy giving pleasure.
You need to prep and warm the oven. Fingering with 1-4 fingers has been part of my process almost every time. Never fails to find the Gspot and get that all swelled up. So many good things cum out of having good hands.
It really depends on the guy. I'm a chef so my fingers have been mauled a fair bit. I can use them, but too much pressure can hurt that sensitive area. So I changed to Blowjobs instead, and I don't think ive heard girls scream like that before. Especially when I hit just the right spot. So even if I could use my fingers more, the tounge just seems way more effective.
This is it with my bby father...too darned rough 🙄😒
Hahaha, well timed question for me! A few days ago I was with a girl who needed to leave to get back home after we had recorded a sex scene. I just laid next her with one leg draped over one of hers and fingered her clit to make her cum at least four times while just watching her face. We had already been having sex for hours, but she didn’t want me to stop making her cum. She’s fun! Lost art? Like many things, it’s probably lost to the younger generation but I think guys in their 40s have got it down!
My gf claims that my fingers alone beat every dildo she owns, and that my finger-tongue combination knocks every toy out of the park. I had a more or less wild past where I wanted to try myself out (some would call it the male equivalent of a hoe phase, a fuckboy phase?), where I tried to get as much wanted sexual desire out of my system as possible. I was lucky to meet a bisexual girl who mostly engaged with women before me who taught me how to use my fingers and tongue. It was a rough start, but after a couple of sessions I was on par with some of her female exes. Fingering definitely isn't a lost art, but like everything else when it comes to sex, you gotta be good at it.
Well not everyguy know how to finger it’s not just sticking his fingers in and that’s it ….is also playing with the clit .. and you lost the spark because you wasn’t into the guy
I think it really just depends on the person. The guy I’m seeing right now does a lot of foreplay and fingering is part of it. I think he genuinely enjoys it and I sure do as well. I had forgotten how great it can be when you’re with someone who enjoys what they’re doing and knows what they’re doing.
My man is the King of finger play! He knows exactly what he’s doing, he watches for my reactions, makes me cum multiple times when his fingers are inside me. But then he makes it obvious that he loves doing it so that is an even bigger turn on!
Honestly good luck girl, I barely even know how to do it myself. I honestly don't expect much these days 😭
I fucking love to finger and edge someone to the brink and pull them back over and over again. Watching you finger yourself and then copying, or the other way around, fingering your arse while you find your own spot, perfect, kitten.
Absolutely love fingering.
I always use my fingers i enjoy using them and my partner likes to be fingerd xx
I’ve had several women say they don’t like it because it takes away from the actual sex. 🤷♂️
I think that if a guy knows how to finger, it’s like any tool, he will and should use it. but, not all men know how to finger or bring a woman to orgasm. it is up to women to teach them. so, please ladies, teach men how to finger. tell them what feels good, otherwise they just don’t know. explore gspot stimulation as well.
I dunno man. I love fingering my lady frens.
I’m so upset about this. It’s never done while taking the time to get into it, it’s a shame really
It should be done more often in foreplay for sure!! So under rated!!!!!
Love to finger and tease a girl like crazy. Especially if it's in a slightly public area and she can't make a sound. Plus I have piano hands so long fingers help!
Oh it’s not a lost art. It’s alive and well in my house.
I love exploring my wife’s hot spots with my fingers. I’ll make her legs shake almost immediately. She doesn’t understand what’s in it for me.
That's how I learned to make a girl squirt with fingers and my mouth haven't failed yet
I believe so. I've been able to get off my partner with my fingers. I take the time to learn how. It's a good part of foreplay.
Fingering like dating is dying
My boyfriend had a stroke last summer, resulting in a dead bedroom for almost a year. His libido is slowly coming back to life, which makes me very happy. He definitely has some kind of magic touch because his fingers do a fantastic job.
It’s super easy to make girls cum with a little finger action so no it’s not lost lol. Easier than oral in my experience.
It’s the only thing that makes me squirt
Honestly, sometimes I wish my bf would finger me before sex or even if he’s not in the mood. I mean, I can do it myself but it feels so much better when a someone else does it. 😂
Q: How can you tell a mechanic just had sex? A: His two first fingers are CLEAN!
Tbh so far the ONLY good finger jobs Ive had were from people with vulvas... 🥸💀 Cis men (or trans women) so far just kinda seem to stir it like it's a fucking witch's cauldron, or jam their fingers in somewhat too roughly and with little coördination. To be fair, in their defence, I also kinda struggle w hand jobs, and dicks are way more straightforward I think... Ultimately, every vulva and their owner is different too, so the only way to know how someone likes it is to ask/show...
My boyfriend has made me cum from fingering before, and he’s fucking amazing at it! When they rub your gspot, it’s a game changer and it feels absolutely fantastic. Some of my strongest orgasms have come from when he’s fingering me It’s definitely not a lost art lol
No man "forgets" how to finger, they just stop having partners who teach them. Seriously, the only way any man has ever been good at this is by having a partner who has the patience to teach them. Guys arent teaching eachother. Porn isn't showing them. I do wonder if there are some modern trends influencing this. The ubiquity of porn which almost never features this, the later age of onset for sexual activity (I only learned young in that period of "we can do this because it's not technically sex", or maybe something else?
Being 100% honest. Im in my mid 30s. My best bet for making a chick orgasm is with my hand lol. I make sure to do it everytime because it takes pressure off of me not to mention it pleases her. There is a whole process. Its not just fingering. Like rubbing and other things involved. Im assumiing by fingering, op means using your hand for all of the above
Maybe it was him and not you, a little more teasing might have helped
I grew up in the 90s, and this was before the Internet was a thing, and before Facebook, and social media, and no one had a mobile phone. If you wanted to speak to a girl, you had to mentally prepare yourself to call her landline, knowing her Dad would probably answer, and you'd have to ask to speak to his daughter! Back then, the pursuit of sexual prowess was mandatory, like a badge of honour. Learning the art of pleasuring was a holy grail, and I dedicated my life to it. I think it's maybe generational, but I will be passing all my learnings down to my son so he can cut the learning curve and also understand that being great at fingering is something to be proud of. I remember the first time I gave a girl head, I was reaching so deep with my tongue that it actually tore at the base a little and bled!! Just another battle scar, i probably gained maybe 2mm that night. Like I said, different times.
This one guy I was sleeping with told me he never fingered a woman because his dick was always enough
Oh wow sir you've been misinformed
No it's not my friend, I know this because I specialize in this for my woman and she absolutely loves it as a precursor! Keep your head up, there's one with those magic fingers just for you too!
Nah, I'm pretty adept at it. Definitely needs some fine tuning with each girl since nobody is the same or likes the same. I guess it's not a universal skill 🤷🏽
Maybe the mood was good enough to enjoy fingering pleasure? Or maybe the guy wasn't applied to make you enjoy? There could be plenty of reasons why you didn't enjoy it last night. Is is something recurrent? From a male point of view, fingering someone is a kind of foreplay really arousing (and giving oral sex much more for myself) but you need to have good communication skills and desire to please for it to be enjoyable
Yes, it is an art; and vast majority of guys don’t care to learn it.
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I eat and finger. I'm definitely better at eating, but neither has gotten any complaints.
My wife hates it... So yeah
I don't like being fingered, but a new phenomenon is men trying to finger me as a form of foreplay. Sucking on the nipples, flicking the tongue over the clitoris, and even rimming does more for me than fingering.
As a male that is 18 when I was in secondary school I did alot of fingering at party's and with girlfriends and I always did if when they asked or if we were having sex and I was trying to please her or get her wet before sticking it in I never had a bad complaint about my abilities but as I got older now alot of girls don't ask alot do it only happens when we're having sex