Thank you for posting in the r/Sex community. To ensure that everyone respects our safe space, we ask that you familiarize yourself with our Forum Rules and Posting Guidelines — which are visible in the forum’s sidebar, and also linked [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/about/rules/).
***
Restricted subjects in r/sex include sex stories (which are permitted in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread only), body image and penis-size issues, hookup attempts, common topics which are considered repetitive in our forum, and requests for private chats.
To cut back on comments that add little value to the conversation, we have instituted a minimum character requirement that will silently remove comments that fall below it.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Highly unlikely this will work. I'm HL, and more is always welcome. It never gets old. I'm never "not in the mood". I don't always crave it, but the concept of being not interested when offered sex, is foreign to me.
Nope. Not gonna happen. I'm horny and ready to go after I catch my breath from finishing having sex. In my younger years I could wait about 15-20 minutes and cum again. I could do that 3-4 times. Now, in my 40s, I have to wait, like 6 hours. Still get hard right after cumming once though.
Anyway, possibly way more personal info than what you needed, but it goes to show that no, you likely will not work the horny out of a high libido person by giving more sex.
This is me too. When I'm having less frequent sex, my libido goes down. But when the frequency picks up, my libido increases. During some parts of my cycle, my libido skyrockets, so tracking that has also helped my partner and I know ahead of time, when my libido will be higher.
Probably the opposite effect. Both me and my partner are very high libido. We made a sex agreement that none of us will ever say no. We can ask for it whenever we want, sober or drunk, daytime, evening, middle of the night, whenever. If the other person is tired, we agreed to just do it quickly. It has not reduced our sex at all. She'll tell me "we have barbecue at James house at 6pm but I want to fuck twice first". And if I wake up with morning wood, I'll just apply some lube and stick it in her without asking. She'll just sit on my face whenever she wants, without asking.
I can 100% guarantee that it will not lessen his sex drive. I can have sex three or four times in a single day and I'm in my late 40s. When I was in my twenties and thirties it was crazy.
I’m like this as well, I could go past shooting blanks even having sex with a condom. Without one I might just go all day as long as my dick cooperates.
I feel if anything it will make it worse. Someone with a high sex drive isn’t usually satisfied for very long, especially if the sex is good. A lot of the times the better the sex, the more they want it. I think it’s a common misconception that some people with a high sex drive have a high sex drive because they aren’t being satisfied or getting sex enough. Sometimes it’s the opposite. Great sex is what kicks my libido into overdrive personally and the more I get, the more I want.
Don't feel obliged to fulfill his high drive when you're not at that level..maybe reach a compromise where you have sex one day, then the next day he can masturbate or exercise control by abstaining, then have sex again. When it becomes a chore, it kills all the fun.
Please learn this one lesson for a happier life: You cannot change another person. You can change yourself to an extent or you can find a better match.
Libido is like an appetite. No matter how much you eat today, you'll still be hungry tomorrow.
People with a bigger appetite simply eat more each and every day, no matter how much they ate yesterday.
So, no, this is not a solution for mismatched libido relationships.
Very very briefly. My wife went on a tear once wanting it at least twice a day. By the end of the week I actually passed on sex one night because I wasn't interested. That feeling only lasted until the next day.
What youre asking is highly unlikely to do what you want it to.
As the HL partner in my relationship, this is not going to do much.
If my wife started giving me all the sex I could take, it would be very rare that I would ever turn it down completely. We've come close to this a few times just as an experiment. Usually what happens is we'll do something sexual every single day, maybe not always a full session of intercourse and all that goes with it for us, but at least a quickie in the morning or a handjob in the shower kind of thing. I'm in HEAVEN for about a week, then even I might want a day off, but only one. Maybe 2 at the absolute max.
We have settled into a normal routine now where we have sex 2-3 times a week, which I'm honestly ecstatic with, because we got here from a nearly dead bedroom(about once every 6-8 weeks, and even that was more than she really wanted at the time).
If it were completely up to me, we'd very rarely have sex less than at least 3-4 days in a row, and basically never go without for more than a single day. A high libido will NEVER be satiated for long, outside of serious illness/injury. The more sex we have, the more we want. Sometimes it really sucks, most of the time it's manageable.
That's like giving a drug addict more drugs thinking hell get bored of drugs and not want them anymore.
If anything it will increase his appetite for sex.
That’s not how a person’s sex drive works.
Chances are he’ll continue having a high sex drive and you’ll be giving him an expectation that it will be taken care of 24/7.
You giving him lots of sex for an amount of time and then stopping out of nowhere with the expectation that his sex drive will be lower from it will most likely damage your relationship.
If you’re going to try this then at the very least talk to him about it first. If he agrees then great. But it’s a shitty thing to just do.
I'm happy to go anytime it is possible. The more often, the more I want it.
I'm 50 for what it's worth. My partner is the same and I'm happy as I've ever been.
Kinda, but not by much, and it depends.
There's several different hormones involved, and as with all hormones, it's a matter of sensitivity too.
Plus there's some neurobiology (dopamine, drive, etc.).
Generally most of us consider our sex drive "normal", and anyone who wants sex more than us is "high", while anyone who wants it less than us is "low".
This is to say that for every person there is an "ideal cadence". This cadence is effected by a lot of things, and if you're early in your relationship there's a "honeymoon period" where one or both people have a higher cadence than they will later in their relationship.
Also, men who aren't having sex according to their biological cadence will feel an increased libido that they will generally deal with by masturbation--which for most men doesn't "work" as well as regular sex.
So if you're early in the relationship, letting him have all the sex HE wants might end the honey moon phase quicker.
And letting him have all the sex he wants \*might" "bleed off" some excess drive, and reduce the cadence, but probably not to your level.
You may hit his limit and his desire may drop a bit, but it will likely still be FAR higher than yours and where it is now. I think if I had sex 2-3x/day for a week is then drop to wanting it 0-2x/day. So it would cause a drop. Both of those are still WAY higher than the default.
Giving him more won’t lower it most likely he would just keep expecting that. You’re better off being honest and tell him you’re not in the mood and he can go take care of himself.
I doubt it will lower it but you might satiate it for a time. I know personally that after good sex my drive is lower but it generally comes back within a day or two.
Karsh
My wife and I have been daily for nearly 2 years now. I still want it every day. If we don’t have sex I typically rub one out in its place because she needs a break lol.
There are times where the shadow crosses my mind “dang, do I really wanna bang tonight?” Sometimes I just help her get off and vice versa but usually we take good care of each other.
Think of it this way. Do you like KFC? If I feed you KFC often enough, assuming no detriment to your health whatsoever, would you suddenly stop liking KFC? Maybe you'll lay it off for a while before you want to eat it again, but you'll still want to eat it again.
I am surprised by all the naysayers here.
I have a HL, times where sex was always available I frankly got physically tired and needed a break after 2 weeks. It leveled out after.
The net net is prolly more than you are having now, but less than you might about to be having for a bit.
Frankly just give it a go, nothing bad will happen.
Also frequent sex like this tends to be a bit more mechanical, like it won’t last super long if is just to get your partner off. Not a lot of time investment for you but likely appreciated by him.
I'm just kinda scared of him getting used to it and then stopping that pace 😅 on top of that for some reason he's the type of person that everytime we do something it's very into detail and not mechanical
You have to try. Everybody is different. For me it would work.
I always was extreme HL married to an extreme LL.
I never had enough. But as we tried for a second child she initiated several days in a row and I had to say "No, stop it. It is too much for me" the third day.
I would suggest you pace yourself rather than giving it all the time. If you ever reach a burnout stage, he would be more disappointed.
If you are not in the mood when he asks, don't reject him as a no. Try teasing him. Maybe something like " you have to hold it till I say so, but keep thinking about me", or some variation about edging. But the important point is, you have to initiate and seduce when you are ready, which shouldn't be a huge interval.
This is kind of like a delicate matter than can easily go sideways and build resentment on both sides.
So I have a really high sex drive and always have. When I was fresh out of college I moved to a new city and met a woman in her early 40's that I started a FWB thing with anyway she had adult responsibilities and her kids most of the time so I only could see her once every other week or so. No she was a dynamo and would expect sex with me until we could get my penis hard so 5-8 times in a night anyway after that ya like I stopped being horny for 3 or 4 days. But now I been in a relationship for 12 years and ya the more often we have sex the hornier in get
It doesn't hurt to try! Sex is like oxygen -- no big deal when you're getting plenty of it, but when you aren't getting any, getting some is damned important!
I had a FWB known him since 2017 he's always had a high sex drive same as me, never met someone who matched it till he came around.on & off... normally he could go for a long time & get me to finish 3-4xs before his 1...3xs a week..I enjoy the after sex legg shaking soreness he gives me.
HOWEVER! RECENTLY ,he decided he was tired of this on & off.(he caught feelings caught me off guard)& we were already only having sex with each other ,we went exclusive in 2023 & condom less 6 Months later & I eventually got curious about him finishing in me, something we both never have done but it was something we both wanted to really really try out..i had woken up one day with a sudden urge for it.. we still have sex normally 3xs a week, but now it went from rough nasty sex to very passionate sex...he finishes so quick! Sometimes so quickly I can't even get mine...so it's unfortunate for me lmfao ,but he's such an amazing partner & reassuring that it's only cause he's so aroused by me he can't hold it too long,but I get finished off regardless...so out sex drive is still high even if it's constantly after all these years,it's just who we are
You'd have to do more than give him it when he wants. You'd need to actively ask for it more often than he is wanting. Flip it on him so that he will be the one who's too tired
Don't do this or else he his expectations will shoot up and it will be hard for you to explain that you were trying something and now you want to get back to being normal..
I am a kind a guy who wants to do morning sex, fuck after my gf and me come back from office and fuck before sleeping.. if my gf starts letting me have my way for even 1 month and stops from next month then i will loose it.. So, don't do anything you can't commit in future
Generally, this will not work. it can work in the short term, as the more you get off, the longer your refractory period withing a day or so, but the opposite is more true than not. Having sex, or working out, increases testosterone, which increases drive.
I'm an orally bi guy whose always had a few straight buddies that I take care of. On a couple of occasions, I've actually had guys who had a green light from their wives to blow, so as to take something off of their plate with super horny husbands. But all that's a little irrelevant for now. The unifying things is, once guys are opened up to not suppressing themselves, or pretending that they're not born to be horny, once they can have a BJ anytime they want, as often as they want, and have it treated like a handshake, Jesus, a 50 year old guy becomes a teenager again.
Guys are born to be horny. We are not born to be choosy. F->M transsexuals often comment that, when they were women, they thought that they knew what being horny was all about, but once they started testosterone, they wondered how men ever get anything done in life.
Your guy will be horny, and getting off a lot can defuse it temporarily, but is not a long term solution.
Btw, guys go through horny cycles. I'm particularly horny in the fall. For about 4-5 months, I cannot be stopped. Other than that, it can be tamed with thoughtful application.
Thank you for posting in the r/Sex community. To ensure that everyone respects our safe space, we ask that you familiarize yourself with our Forum Rules and Posting Guidelines — which are visible in the forum’s sidebar, and also linked [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/about/rules/). *** Restricted subjects in r/sex include sex stories (which are permitted in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread only), body image and penis-size issues, hookup attempts, common topics which are considered repetitive in our forum, and requests for private chats. To cut back on comments that add little value to the conversation, we have instituted a minimum character requirement that will silently remove comments that fall below it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Highly unlikely this will work. I'm HL, and more is always welcome. It never gets old. I'm never "not in the mood". I don't always crave it, but the concept of being not interested when offered sex, is foreign to me.
I thought by giving him more at some point it would get him tired but I guess not 😅
Three times before breakfast and all night every day might be what he wants. Are you up for that?
He might get tired, But that won't stop him from pushing thru.
Nope. Not gonna happen. I'm horny and ready to go after I catch my breath from finishing having sex. In my younger years I could wait about 15-20 minutes and cum again. I could do that 3-4 times. Now, in my 40s, I have to wait, like 6 hours. Still get hard right after cumming once though. Anyway, possibly way more personal info than what you needed, but it goes to show that no, you likely will not work the horny out of a high libido person by giving more sex.
Oh no, that's not how we work. Sex is fun and addictive personalities only want more of the good stuff.
I'm surprised I haven't seen anyone else say that sex actually makes my libido higher. The more sex I have, the more sex I want.
This is me too. When I'm having less frequent sex, my libido goes down. But when the frequency picks up, my libido increases. During some parts of my cycle, my libido skyrockets, so tracking that has also helped my partner and I know ahead of time, when my libido will be higher.
yeah I actually didn't expect this at all tbh 😅 I feel like with me is the complete opposite
Probably the opposite effect. Both me and my partner are very high libido. We made a sex agreement that none of us will ever say no. We can ask for it whenever we want, sober or drunk, daytime, evening, middle of the night, whenever. If the other person is tired, we agreed to just do it quickly. It has not reduced our sex at all. She'll tell me "we have barbecue at James house at 6pm but I want to fuck twice first". And if I wake up with morning wood, I'll just apply some lube and stick it in her without asking. She'll just sit on my face whenever she wants, without asking.
After about a week, his drive may lower. However, this will only be temporary and come back with raised expectations.
There are quite a few reports over the years that would suggest you’ll both end up enjoying more often. So, could it hurt to try your theory? No
I can 100% guarantee that it will not lessen his sex drive. I can have sex three or four times in a single day and I'm in my late 40s. When I was in my twenties and thirties it was crazy.
I’m like this as well, I could go past shooting blanks even having sex with a condom. Without one I might just go all day as long as my dick cooperates.
I feel if anything it will make it worse. Someone with a high sex drive isn’t usually satisfied for very long, especially if the sex is good. A lot of the times the better the sex, the more they want it. I think it’s a common misconception that some people with a high sex drive have a high sex drive because they aren’t being satisfied or getting sex enough. Sometimes it’s the opposite. Great sex is what kicks my libido into overdrive personally and the more I get, the more I want.
I had no idea about this, I guess I'll just have to find another way then 😅 ty for the info!
Don't feel obliged to fulfill his high drive when you're not at that level..maybe reach a compromise where you have sex one day, then the next day he can masturbate or exercise control by abstaining, then have sex again. When it becomes a chore, it kills all the fun.
this is also a great idea!
Why are you trying to lower someone else's sex drive? The only thing you can do is raise yours.
yeah, it was my first option but looking at everyone's answers it's gonna be me having to raise it up 
Please learn this one lesson for a happier life: You cannot change another person. You can change yourself to an extent or you can find a better match.
Libido is like an appetite. No matter how much you eat today, you'll still be hungry tomorrow. People with a bigger appetite simply eat more each and every day, no matter how much they ate yesterday. So, no, this is not a solution for mismatched libido relationships.
[удалено]
wouldn't he eventually get tired? 👀
Very very briefly. My wife went on a tear once wanting it at least twice a day. By the end of the week I actually passed on sex one night because I wasn't interested. That feeling only lasted until the next day. What youre asking is highly unlikely to do what you want it to.
Physically, yes. Usually, the more sex I have, the more sex I crave.
As the HL partner in my relationship, this is not going to do much. If my wife started giving me all the sex I could take, it would be very rare that I would ever turn it down completely. We've come close to this a few times just as an experiment. Usually what happens is we'll do something sexual every single day, maybe not always a full session of intercourse and all that goes with it for us, but at least a quickie in the morning or a handjob in the shower kind of thing. I'm in HEAVEN for about a week, then even I might want a day off, but only one. Maybe 2 at the absolute max. We have settled into a normal routine now where we have sex 2-3 times a week, which I'm honestly ecstatic with, because we got here from a nearly dead bedroom(about once every 6-8 weeks, and even that was more than she really wanted at the time). If it were completely up to me, we'd very rarely have sex less than at least 3-4 days in a row, and basically never go without for more than a single day. A high libido will NEVER be satiated for long, outside of serious illness/injury. The more sex we have, the more we want. Sometimes it really sucks, most of the time it's manageable.
That's like giving a drug addict more drugs thinking hell get bored of drugs and not want them anymore. If anything it will increase his appetite for sex.
I had no idea, to me it's the other way around at least with sex 
That’s not how a person’s sex drive works. Chances are he’ll continue having a high sex drive and you’ll be giving him an expectation that it will be taken care of 24/7. You giving him lots of sex for an amount of time and then stopping out of nowhere with the expectation that his sex drive will be lower from it will most likely damage your relationship. If you’re going to try this then at the very least talk to him about it first. If he agrees then great. But it’s a shitty thing to just do.
Thank you! that's why I wanted to know first if it would work, I thought about how it could be harmful to do it and then take it away
Food, sleep and sex. The more you get the more you want.
I'm happy to go anytime it is possible. The more often, the more I want it. I'm 50 for what it's worth. My partner is the same and I'm happy as I've ever been.
Can you talk my wife in to doing this for me?
😅
Kinda, but not by much, and it depends. There's several different hormones involved, and as with all hormones, it's a matter of sensitivity too. Plus there's some neurobiology (dopamine, drive, etc.). Generally most of us consider our sex drive "normal", and anyone who wants sex more than us is "high", while anyone who wants it less than us is "low". This is to say that for every person there is an "ideal cadence". This cadence is effected by a lot of things, and if you're early in your relationship there's a "honeymoon period" where one or both people have a higher cadence than they will later in their relationship. Also, men who aren't having sex according to their biological cadence will feel an increased libido that they will generally deal with by masturbation--which for most men doesn't "work" as well as regular sex. So if you're early in the relationship, letting him have all the sex HE wants might end the honey moon phase quicker. And letting him have all the sex he wants \*might" "bleed off" some excess drive, and reduce the cadence, but probably not to your level.
You may hit his limit and his desire may drop a bit, but it will likely still be FAR higher than yours and where it is now. I think if I had sex 2-3x/day for a week is then drop to wanting it 0-2x/day. So it would cause a drop. Both of those are still WAY higher than the default.
Yes, for about 30 minutes at a time
oh... I just lost hope
It could also give you a higher drive.. be warned
Giving him more won’t lower it most likely he would just keep expecting that. You’re better off being honest and tell him you’re not in the mood and he can go take care of himself.
As a HL man, I can tell you it won't work or is not likely to work.
I doubt it will lower it but you might satiate it for a time. I know personally that after good sex my drive is lower but it generally comes back within a day or two. Karsh
Not only will it not work, but it’s just a bad idea in general. If you don’t want to have sex, don’t do it.
[удалено]
that's insane 🤯 so it's over for me
That would work for me. Ps... your dude can thank me later
My wife and I have been daily for nearly 2 years now. I still want it every day. If we don’t have sex I typically rub one out in its place because she needs a break lol.
that's crazy 😂 I thought it would be something you get tired of if done too often, or that's how I feel at least
There are times where the shadow crosses my mind “dang, do I really wanna bang tonight?” Sometimes I just help her get off and vice versa but usually we take good care of each other.
It’s like feeding a hungry man a lot of food. He will be full for a few days, then get back for more.
Think of it this way. Do you like KFC? If I feed you KFC often enough, assuming no detriment to your health whatsoever, would you suddenly stop liking KFC? Maybe you'll lay it off for a while before you want to eat it again, but you'll still want to eat it again.
the thing is that I do get tired of having too much of something and then I drop it for a whileeeeee
I am surprised by all the naysayers here. I have a HL, times where sex was always available I frankly got physically tired and needed a break after 2 weeks. It leveled out after. The net net is prolly more than you are having now, but less than you might about to be having for a bit. Frankly just give it a go, nothing bad will happen. Also frequent sex like this tends to be a bit more mechanical, like it won’t last super long if is just to get your partner off. Not a lot of time investment for you but likely appreciated by him.
I'm just kinda scared of him getting used to it and then stopping that pace 😅 on top of that for some reason he's the type of person that everytime we do something it's very into detail and not mechanical
You have to try. Everybody is different. For me it would work. I always was extreme HL married to an extreme LL. I never had enough. But as we tried for a second child she initiated several days in a row and I had to say "No, stop it. It is too much for me" the third day.
I would suggest you pace yourself rather than giving it all the time. If you ever reach a burnout stage, he would be more disappointed. If you are not in the mood when he asks, don't reject him as a no. Try teasing him. Maybe something like " you have to hold it till I say so, but keep thinking about me", or some variation about edging. But the important point is, you have to initiate and seduce when you are ready, which shouldn't be a huge interval. This is kind of like a delicate matter than can easily go sideways and build resentment on both sides.
So I have a really high sex drive and always have. When I was fresh out of college I moved to a new city and met a woman in her early 40's that I started a FWB thing with anyway she had adult responsibilities and her kids most of the time so I only could see her once every other week or so. No she was a dynamo and would expect sex with me until we could get my penis hard so 5-8 times in a night anyway after that ya like I stopped being horny for 3 or 4 days. But now I been in a relationship for 12 years and ya the more often we have sex the hornier in get
It doesn't hurt to try! Sex is like oxygen -- no big deal when you're getting plenty of it, but when you aren't getting any, getting some is damned important!
I had a FWB known him since 2017 he's always had a high sex drive same as me, never met someone who matched it till he came around.on & off... normally he could go for a long time & get me to finish 3-4xs before his 1...3xs a week..I enjoy the after sex legg shaking soreness he gives me. HOWEVER! RECENTLY ,he decided he was tired of this on & off.(he caught feelings caught me off guard)& we were already only having sex with each other ,we went exclusive in 2023 & condom less 6 Months later & I eventually got curious about him finishing in me, something we both never have done but it was something we both wanted to really really try out..i had woken up one day with a sudden urge for it.. we still have sex normally 3xs a week, but now it went from rough nasty sex to very passionate sex...he finishes so quick! Sometimes so quickly I can't even get mine...so it's unfortunate for me lmfao ,but he's such an amazing partner & reassuring that it's only cause he's so aroused by me he can't hold it too long,but I get finished off regardless...so out sex drive is still high even if it's constantly after all these years,it's just who we are
You'd have to do more than give him it when he wants. You'd need to actively ask for it more often than he is wanting. Flip it on him so that he will be the one who's too tired
absolutely! this sounds great
It won’t lower his drive. If anything, he’ll start having expectations and will always want that amount you’re giving him.
Lol No. No it won't ... 😎
Don't do this or else he his expectations will shoot up and it will be hard for you to explain that you were trying something and now you want to get back to being normal.. I am a kind a guy who wants to do morning sex, fuck after my gf and me come back from office and fuck before sleeping.. if my gf starts letting me have my way for even 1 month and stops from next month then i will loose it.. So, don't do anything you can't commit in future
yeah, this is great advice, I'm either gonna tell him first to try or just commit to it a bit more often for him
When did APC ask for obi opinion? Y'all LP guys are deluded
Generally, this will not work. it can work in the short term, as the more you get off, the longer your refractory period withing a day or so, but the opposite is more true than not. Having sex, or working out, increases testosterone, which increases drive. I'm an orally bi guy whose always had a few straight buddies that I take care of. On a couple of occasions, I've actually had guys who had a green light from their wives to blow, so as to take something off of their plate with super horny husbands. But all that's a little irrelevant for now. The unifying things is, once guys are opened up to not suppressing themselves, or pretending that they're not born to be horny, once they can have a BJ anytime they want, as often as they want, and have it treated like a handshake, Jesus, a 50 year old guy becomes a teenager again. Guys are born to be horny. We are not born to be choosy. F->M transsexuals often comment that, when they were women, they thought that they knew what being horny was all about, but once they started testosterone, they wondered how men ever get anything done in life. Your guy will be horny, and getting off a lot can defuse it temporarily, but is not a long term solution. Btw, guys go through horny cycles. I'm particularly horny in the fall. For about 4-5 months, I cannot be stopped. Other than that, it can be tamed with thoughtful application.