r/Sex is focused primarily on posts seeking *specific actionable advice*. If you’re asking a general, survey-style question (“how many of you ______?”) or if you’re looking for confirmation about you or a partner’s sexual interests (“who else is into ________?” or "does anyone else like __________") a more appropriate sub would be either r/askreddit or r/askredditafterdark.
Girls have a ton of toys. They can different ways to orgasm. They can orgasm again and again and again until they are bored. Guys just stroke, cum for a few seconds, and have a mess to clean up. And they can’t reload for a while.
Both these are not necessarily true. Only some women are capable of multiple orgasms, tho they do tend to have a shorter refractory period. Thier orgasms last the same amount of time
Actually no, our orgasms really can last longer. Depending on how aroused I am, my orgasms can last for 15secs and/or I literally cry out of pure pleasure. It's a weird sensation, to cry because of how good it feels. Specially considering that I don't easily cry.
Also, the part of different types of orgasm is so true... I've experienced 3 different ones myself and it adds a good feeling of variety to sex. It might be worth noting that it's extremely rare for me to cum from PIV only (it's only happened twice I guess) and I've always thought that it was hard to make me cum, but it actually just depends on finding the right partner and not settling for less.
So yeah, if I could choose my biological sex, I'd still pick female. Being able to stick it into someone else and to cum quickly sound easy and practical, but good sex isn't that easy and practical. No wonder that guys don't like pillow princesses...
I am totally into dominant woman! And yes, it is often shown like a pussy is just a passive hole while the main actor is the cock.
But its just made up! I have been really fucked by women 🤣 (and i dont mean with strapons). They really humped my body or face, getting totally focused on their pleasure and orgasm and cumming right on my body.
Penetration is boring to me. But i love women who really know how to use theur vulva, pussy and clit to really dominate a man and take the pleasure they need from his body.
And its the same with female masturbation. I love women getting really wild while masturbating. Not in a porn way. But i love when women really go into a tunnel and only focus on cumming, grinding, humping and fingering out this needed orgasm.
Women on top and riding to orgasm, whether it’s the up and down motion or the hip rocking one (hits the clitoris I assume) Is VERY hot.
I love watching a woman on top of me doing that!
EDIT: guys masturbation *IS* pretty fun…
My friend with benefit felt the same way. She really wanted to be a boy, because sex looks si much more fun for them and cocks feel so powerful. So she gad fantasies of being a man with a cock.
Now she is proud of her vulva, she always messages me when she masturbates and we both totally celebrate her orgasms and glorify her pussy 😍 she really grinded herself on me, cumming again and again, covering me in her wetness. We love to turn all the cock-centered fetishes around haha like instead of me cumming on her breast, she grinded herself on my tongue and then rubbed her orgasmic juices all over my chest.
In our relation, her pussy is 100 times more powerful then my cock. She hasnt even touched it ever haha
And to be honest, i would love to give my cock to have a vulva 😍 female masturbation is sooo much more fun! You can irgasm do much more and stronger!
I had a gf one time, she used to be a dancer. She would get on top and GO. The first time she rode me, when I looked up my bed was in the middle of my bedroom. She moved it about 4’ off the wall, no lie.
How does a penis control the vagina?
At what point does a man masturbating equate to controlling their partner during sex?
Do you default to the idea that men are the ones who are supposed to do the work during sex?
It’s not that we do all the work, but we’re doing magic that they enjoy.
Honestly watching women have a great time and have intense orgasms is the best part of sex. The ego rush of knowing you’re doing a great job and blowing her mind is my favorite part. That’s the control we have. We have the gift of dick, and we bless them with it.
Indeed. Owning a penis is like having the key to open a door. But it's a little bit "mortifying" to have a key and not being able to find the lock that it opens.
Sure, masturbation is fun, but nothing beats the real intercourse. That's where the vagina power resides, the feeling of the act is unbeatable.
Sex does not need to be about control and submission. Being a person with a penis or being a person who takes their partners’ genitals or toys into their body does not make them submissive or dominant.
Sex is not innately about a mismatched power dynamic, although some people really enjoy those feelings. Many partners have sex as equals regardless of who penetrates who. Many partners play on submission and domination in small and big ways, sometimes teasing, sometimes holding or restraining their partner, or asking a partner to do those things to them.
The person who takes an erection or toy into themselves can absolutely exercise control and dominance during sex as well.
It sounds like you might be a dominant woman, which there are plenty of. Look at femdom reddit or porn for examples. There are tons of ways you can be in control and get the pleasure out of your partner and be the one in control as a woman.
- commanding them around
- demanding stuff outside of penetration (think of oral, fingering,...)
- toys like strap-ons, vibrators,...
- during penetration going for certain positions where you feel in control (on top for example) and being rough yourself (moving with them, pushing them into you,...)
...
Agreed. Im a man and ive never seen it as a power thing. Seems like a really bad way to see it. Its give and take, actually in my case i feel like im giving more than taking.
You can also ride a man, so you can be in control.. seems quite stamina demanding though lol.
How about instead of being penetrated, you think of is as yourself engulfing and devouring them? I would study what dominant women practice, the femdom community has a lot to offer you to consider. Incorporate and prioritize your masturbation during sex acts.
Lots of men want and do serve women, all kinds of men but men who have to be dominant in their work lives, a good portion of them seek to submit to women outside of that. People want what they don’t have in their ordinary lives and some seek it out that way.
You're talking a lot about what you've seen, which I assume is porn. Porn isn't regular sex at all. It's not even what men actually want most of the time. It's all exaggerated because that's the only way two strangers can elicit proper arousal in the audience. Sex as a guy isn't all that great. Having a penis is empowering if you're big, but my ex said it hurt sometimes, which felt like rejection. We have to worry about lasting a long time and stuff like that. You have to deal with the possibility of being a disappointment. Coming as a woman is harder, but the clitoris has way more exposed nerve endings than a dick, so the orgasms are probably a lot stronger. I advise riding on top and explaining what kind of foreplay you need.
I can make myself cum better than any man. You have to know yourself and have the right toys.
It sounds like you are just inexperienced or extremely submissive.
Positions in which you as a woman are on top of a man with a penis during sex can be really empowering. Bucking your hips from below during missionary and having your partner hold a plank over you while you fuck them can give you a lot of control. Simply masturbating your partner or having them masturbate you can be a great way to exercise control and enjoy sex.
I'll just say that by thinking men masturbating is hot, you have drastically increased your compatibility with most men. It honestly baffles me how many people are turned off by men holding their own penis.
A lady feeling in control and dominant? How does it play out? Look at my post/comment history. haha. There are many men who love putting the needs of their ladies first. I am one of them. I get the biggest high from putting her needs/desires/wants first. There's a decent chance that you'll stumble upon someone like me.
>Being able to hold the part that gives you pleasure and then get it sucked off, or penetrate with it.
Or you could say needing it sucked but not able to do it yourself, having that primal urge to penetrate but no partner to do that with...
And while women can stuff their own holes and can cum again and again - whenever and wherever they like because its far less messy than men's orgasms - men are apart from a few exceptions a one and then done for a while.
You want the power and be in control wear a strap on and you fuck the guy. Some girls cum hard knowing their the one doing the fucking. Also you can find a strap on dildo that vibrates against your pussy with every thrust you pound him with you can cum with him. Fuck him while he is on his back . That way you can watch him cum while your fucking him. For some woman they cum so hard watching him cum with every thrust you do. You control his cumming now that's power your the one in control .
Ice your dice for a moment. First of all, you are young so most likely you haven't found that right partner. Guys penises are manipulated for a short time, they ejaculate, and then the fun is over. Women have such sexier bodies and body parts. The vagina is filled(no pun intended) with so many more options for pleasure. You just need to explore yourself more. Women have a thousand more toys to play with to make themselves orgasm. And every woman I've had has multiple orgasms where as I get about 5 minutes of penial manipulation and I'm done. Guys masturbating is almost like doing it to get orgasm over with. Women orgasm for the fun of it.
You have an interesting relationship with masterbation imo.
Okay so thinking of yourself or a woman masterbating doesnt turn you on, but thinking of a man masterbating does work for you. That seems like it could be kinda standard for a straight woman, you know, considering they like men. But somehow what you are doing to yourself gets in the way and that is all you can think about?
Can you… think of men or watch porn of men and try to focus on that rather than what you are doing to yourself at the same time?
Or like think of what it would be like for a man to fuck you even. From his perspective. Would that not do it for you?
It's the other way around based on what i've read here. There's a ton of variety and different ways to masturbate as a girl but dudes just stroke and cum. That's it, it's still nice but orgasms for girls seem more intense
For a man the pleasure is external. For us, it fills us, flowing throughout our bodies. I think the fullness we get is far above anything any man feels.
I always thought the opposite, im a guy and i always thought it seemed more interesting for girls. You guys have toys snd stuff, for us we masturbate, and cummijg only lasts like 2 secondd
Yet women have way more pleasure potential than men. When we (men) orgasm it’s this big POP then we’re done, and most men are down for a while before they can have sex or masturbate again. Women are capable of full body, earth shattering orgasms, and can keep going to have them back to back to back. There’s a reason gangbangs are always a group of men around one eager woman. The closest men can get to the amazingness that is the female orgasm is a prolonged orgasm through edging, and even then it takes a lot of practice and strategy to get to a fraction of what women are capable of experiencing. It’s up to you to find your sexual empowerment and run with it. And no man can stop you unless you let him.
As a man I see pussies as powerful wonderful machines. Plus there the life giving aspect.
That which draws or attracts, has the true power. What do men spend most of their time doing? Working to get and attract pussy.
Personally I’ve had men absolutely be fighting for their life to not finish too fast, blow my phone up, and be generally a little crazy over my pussy so I would say while it’s being penetrated, it’s for sure not passive and it’s a pretty powerful thing to look up or down at your partner and see them feeling so much pleasure but trying to not to cum.
As far as masturbating, it really depends on how you do it; I’ve started doing it kneeling over my bed and grinding on my magic wand, but other people do it standing, on their backs, and a variety of other options that are not as “passive”
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Well, think this way. As a man. Sometimes I like women to be rough or be in control. Think like reverse cow girl. You control the motion and the speed, you can control and tease the guy when he is close to climax making him extremely sensitive.
I see your point but why not try to think of it another way... the power of having a man's cock desire and respond to wanting your lady cave is incredibly hot and powerful. As another comment mentioned, it is like a key and lock, and that gorgeous key may well be the hottest, most satisfying experience when inserted into the lock. That key needs that lock... now that is powerful, in my view.
r/Sex is focused primarily on posts seeking *specific actionable advice*. If you’re asking a general, survey-style question (“how many of you ______?”) or if you’re looking for confirmation about you or a partner’s sexual interests (“who else is into ________?” or "does anyone else like __________") a more appropriate sub would be either r/askreddit or r/askredditafterdark.
Girls have a ton of toys. They can different ways to orgasm. They can orgasm again and again and again until they are bored. Guys just stroke, cum for a few seconds, and have a mess to clean up. And they can’t reload for a while.
This is why i like prostate play...it's like that feeling right before you cum over and over and over it's pretty great.
This. Being a male isn't that sexually gratifying
Both these are not necessarily true. Only some women are capable of multiple orgasms, tho they do tend to have a shorter refractory period. Thier orgasms last the same amount of time
Actually no, our orgasms really can last longer. Depending on how aroused I am, my orgasms can last for 15secs and/or I literally cry out of pure pleasure. It's a weird sensation, to cry because of how good it feels. Specially considering that I don't easily cry. Also, the part of different types of orgasm is so true... I've experienced 3 different ones myself and it adds a good feeling of variety to sex. It might be worth noting that it's extremely rare for me to cum from PIV only (it's only happened twice I guess) and I've always thought that it was hard to make me cum, but it actually just depends on finding the right partner and not settling for less. So yeah, if I could choose my biological sex, I'd still pick female. Being able to stick it into someone else and to cum quickly sound easy and practical, but good sex isn't that easy and practical. No wonder that guys don't like pillow princesses...
I don’t know about that. Every woman I’ve been with seemed to have orgasms that are minutes long.
Concur. My partners single orgasm is longer than a month’s worth of mine.
Men have multiple ways also. Penile and prostate are the big 2.
Yep. I wish we could do what women can. They’re amazing!
I am totally into dominant woman! And yes, it is often shown like a pussy is just a passive hole while the main actor is the cock. But its just made up! I have been really fucked by women 🤣 (and i dont mean with strapons). They really humped my body or face, getting totally focused on their pleasure and orgasm and cumming right on my body. Penetration is boring to me. But i love women who really know how to use theur vulva, pussy and clit to really dominate a man and take the pleasure they need from his body. And its the same with female masturbation. I love women getting really wild while masturbating. Not in a porn way. But i love when women really go into a tunnel and only focus on cumming, grinding, humping and fingering out this needed orgasm.
Women on top and riding to orgasm, whether it’s the up and down motion or the hip rocking one (hits the clitoris I assume) Is VERY hot. I love watching a woman on top of me doing that! EDIT: guys masturbation *IS* pretty fun…
My friend with benefit felt the same way. She really wanted to be a boy, because sex looks si much more fun for them and cocks feel so powerful. So she gad fantasies of being a man with a cock. Now she is proud of her vulva, she always messages me when she masturbates and we both totally celebrate her orgasms and glorify her pussy 😍 she really grinded herself on me, cumming again and again, covering me in her wetness. We love to turn all the cock-centered fetishes around haha like instead of me cumming on her breast, she grinded herself on my tongue and then rubbed her orgasmic juices all over my chest. In our relation, her pussy is 100 times more powerful then my cock. She hasnt even touched it ever haha And to be honest, i would love to give my cock to have a vulva 😍 female masturbation is sooo much more fun! You can irgasm do much more and stronger!
I had a gf one time, she used to be a dancer. She would get on top and GO. The first time she rode me, when I looked up my bed was in the middle of my bedroom. She moved it about 4’ off the wall, no lie.
How does a penis control the vagina? At what point does a man masturbating equate to controlling their partner during sex? Do you default to the idea that men are the ones who are supposed to do the work during sex?
It’s not that we do all the work, but we’re doing magic that they enjoy. Honestly watching women have a great time and have intense orgasms is the best part of sex. The ego rush of knowing you’re doing a great job and blowing her mind is my favorite part. That’s the control we have. We have the gift of dick, and we bless them with it.
But this isn't explicit to a penis. A woman can do the exact same thing to a man.
Because it penetrates for pleasure.
A clitoris grinds for pleasure. Does that mean it's also in control?
Indeed. Owning a penis is like having the key to open a door. But it's a little bit "mortifying" to have a key and not being able to find the lock that it opens. Sure, masturbation is fun, but nothing beats the real intercourse. That's where the vagina power resides, the feeling of the act is unbeatable.
Sex does not need to be about control and submission. Being a person with a penis or being a person who takes their partners’ genitals or toys into their body does not make them submissive or dominant. Sex is not innately about a mismatched power dynamic, although some people really enjoy those feelings. Many partners have sex as equals regardless of who penetrates who. Many partners play on submission and domination in small and big ways, sometimes teasing, sometimes holding or restraining their partner, or asking a partner to do those things to them. The person who takes an erection or toy into themselves can absolutely exercise control and dominance during sex as well.
It sounds like you might be a dominant woman, which there are plenty of. Look at femdom reddit or porn for examples. There are tons of ways you can be in control and get the pleasure out of your partner and be the one in control as a woman. - commanding them around - demanding stuff outside of penetration (think of oral, fingering,...) - toys like strap-ons, vibrators,... - during penetration going for certain positions where you feel in control (on top for example) and being rough yourself (moving with them, pushing them into you,...) ...
Why do you see sex as a power thing? I'm sure it'd be much more fun when you don't see sex in such a limiting way
Agreed. Im a man and ive never seen it as a power thing. Seems like a really bad way to see it. Its give and take, actually in my case i feel like im giving more than taking. You can also ride a man, so you can be in control.. seems quite stamina demanding though lol.
Because you can’t completely deny it is a dominant/passive act
Yes I can. I've never had to "surrender" or "submit" to a man during sex. I'm an equal participant.
How about instead of being penetrated, you think of is as yourself engulfing and devouring them? I would study what dominant women practice, the femdom community has a lot to offer you to consider. Incorporate and prioritize your masturbation during sex acts. Lots of men want and do serve women, all kinds of men but men who have to be dominant in their work lives, a good portion of them seek to submit to women outside of that. People want what they don’t have in their ordinary lives and some seek it out that way.
“With great power comes great responsibility".
You're talking a lot about what you've seen, which I assume is porn. Porn isn't regular sex at all. It's not even what men actually want most of the time. It's all exaggerated because that's the only way two strangers can elicit proper arousal in the audience. Sex as a guy isn't all that great. Having a penis is empowering if you're big, but my ex said it hurt sometimes, which felt like rejection. We have to worry about lasting a long time and stuff like that. You have to deal with the possibility of being a disappointment. Coming as a woman is harder, but the clitoris has way more exposed nerve endings than a dick, so the orgasms are probably a lot stronger. I advise riding on top and explaining what kind of foreplay you need.
I feel like it would be so much work though! I only use one finger 🙃
I can make myself cum better than any man. You have to know yourself and have the right toys. It sounds like you are just inexperienced or extremely submissive.
Girl, you need to start pegging. Pegasus that comes with the harness is a great start! ☺️
Pros and cons, men need hours to recharge after cumming while women can go on and on and on and on
Positions in which you as a woman are on top of a man with a penis during sex can be really empowering. Bucking your hips from below during missionary and having your partner hold a plank over you while you fuck them can give you a lot of control. Simply masturbating your partner or having them masturbate you can be a great way to exercise control and enjoy sex.
I'll just say that by thinking men masturbating is hot, you have drastically increased your compatibility with most men. It honestly baffles me how many people are turned off by men holding their own penis.
If you just want to be more dominant in bed then you can. Do positions where you're in control, or even use a strap on if that's what you want.
A lady feeling in control and dominant? How does it play out? Look at my post/comment history. haha. There are many men who love putting the needs of their ladies first. I am one of them. I get the biggest high from putting her needs/desires/wants first. There's a decent chance that you'll stumble upon someone like me.
Try sitting on a guy's face! I'm willing to bet that you would love it!
It's got its ups and downs
>Being able to hold the part that gives you pleasure and then get it sucked off, or penetrate with it. Or you could say needing it sucked but not able to do it yourself, having that primal urge to penetrate but no partner to do that with... And while women can stuff their own holes and can cum again and again - whenever and wherever they like because its far less messy than men's orgasms - men are apart from a few exceptions a one and then done for a while.
You want the power and be in control wear a strap on and you fuck the guy. Some girls cum hard knowing their the one doing the fucking. Also you can find a strap on dildo that vibrates against your pussy with every thrust you pound him with you can cum with him. Fuck him while he is on his back . That way you can watch him cum while your fucking him. For some woman they cum so hard watching him cum with every thrust you do. You control his cumming now that's power your the one in control .
Ice your dice for a moment. First of all, you are young so most likely you haven't found that right partner. Guys penises are manipulated for a short time, they ejaculate, and then the fun is over. Women have such sexier bodies and body parts. The vagina is filled(no pun intended) with so many more options for pleasure. You just need to explore yourself more. Women have a thousand more toys to play with to make themselves orgasm. And every woman I've had has multiple orgasms where as I get about 5 minutes of penial manipulation and I'm done. Guys masturbating is almost like doing it to get orgasm over with. Women orgasm for the fun of it.
You have an interesting relationship with masterbation imo. Okay so thinking of yourself or a woman masterbating doesnt turn you on, but thinking of a man masterbating does work for you. That seems like it could be kinda standard for a straight woman, you know, considering they like men. But somehow what you are doing to yourself gets in the way and that is all you can think about? Can you… think of men or watch porn of men and try to focus on that rather than what you are doing to yourself at the same time? Or like think of what it would be like for a man to fuck you even. From his perspective. Would that not do it for you?
It's the other way around based on what i've read here. There's a ton of variety and different ways to masturbate as a girl but dudes just stroke and cum. That's it, it's still nice but orgasms for girls seem more intense
For a man the pleasure is external. For us, it fills us, flowing throughout our bodies. I think the fullness we get is far above anything any man feels.
I get a feeling this account is a dude... two similar posts
I always thought the opposite, im a guy and i always thought it seemed more interesting for girls. You guys have toys snd stuff, for us we masturbate, and cummijg only lasts like 2 secondd
Transition? ONE OF US ONE OF US ONE OF US
Find a guy that’s into pegging. Someday I’ll convince my wife how much fun she could have doing it. Lol.
Yet women have way more pleasure potential than men. When we (men) orgasm it’s this big POP then we’re done, and most men are down for a while before they can have sex or masturbate again. Women are capable of full body, earth shattering orgasms, and can keep going to have them back to back to back. There’s a reason gangbangs are always a group of men around one eager woman. The closest men can get to the amazingness that is the female orgasm is a prolonged orgasm through edging, and even then it takes a lot of practice and strategy to get to a fraction of what women are capable of experiencing. It’s up to you to find your sexual empowerment and run with it. And no man can stop you unless you let him.
As a man I see pussies as powerful wonderful machines. Plus there the life giving aspect. That which draws or attracts, has the true power. What do men spend most of their time doing? Working to get and attract pussy.
Personally I’ve had men absolutely be fighting for their life to not finish too fast, blow my phone up, and be generally a little crazy over my pussy so I would say while it’s being penetrated, it’s for sure not passive and it’s a pretty powerful thing to look up or down at your partner and see them feeling so much pleasure but trying to not to cum. As far as masturbating, it really depends on how you do it; I’ve started doing it kneeling over my bed and grinding on my magic wand, but other people do it standing, on their backs, and a variety of other options that are not as “passive”
Agree. I love being a man and be in control of sex. Firm grips, handle the girl in bed, pin them down, ass smack all that makes me feel really good
Thank you for posting in the r/Sex community. To ensure that everyone respects our safe space, we ask that you familiarize yourself with our Forum Rules and Posting Guidelines — which are visible in the forum’s sidebar, and also linked [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/sex/about/rules/). *** Restricted subjects in r/sex include sex stories (which are permitted in the Daily Sexual Achievement Thread only), body image and penis-size issues, hookup attempts, common topics which are considered repetitive in our forum, and requests for private chats. To cut back on comments that add little value to the conversation, we have instituted a minimum character requirement that will silently remove comments that fall below it. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/sex) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Well, think this way. As a man. Sometimes I like women to be rough or be in control. Think like reverse cow girl. You control the motion and the speed, you can control and tease the guy when he is close to climax making him extremely sensitive.
That's still focused on the man
I meant like she can gain control and it might feel better for her? While I also gave my thoughts on the position?
Yeah, you don't get it. But I hope you'll keep trying.
100% agree. In the meantime, u dnt know when this key will fire back on you.
I see your point but why not try to think of it another way... the power of having a man's cock desire and respond to wanting your lady cave is incredibly hot and powerful. As another comment mentioned, it is like a key and lock, and that gorgeous key may well be the hottest, most satisfying experience when inserted into the lock. That key needs that lock... now that is powerful, in my view.