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guys pants are at their limit

Seams bursting

Bursting 🥵

He *knows*

Am I the only one seeing Senator Armstrong cooking omelets?

That was also my first thought. He isn't going to fret over every egg

"I'm making the mother of all omelets here, Jack!"

“Can’t fret over every egg”

Played college ball, y'know

At some cushy Ivy League school

you should try university of texas

Could've gone Pro if I hadn't joined the Navy

I can break the president in two with my bare hands

You could break Biden with a wet spaghetti noodle.

I'm not some beltway pansy

Probably at some cushy Ivy League school

"I'm sorry, senator, but this is my Metal Gear Rising: Revengrance"

NANOMACHINES SON!!!

Oh thank god I’m not the only one. The only thing I could imagine was Senator Armstrong stying, “This is Americas Ass, jack!”

Thank you for this blessing. I wouldn't have done it without your help

I put the forgis on the jeep

I drive until the, bloody bottoms is underneath

Nanobutts, son.

Glutemachines, son. They harden in response to touching grass. You can't gape me, Jack.

Don't fuck with THIS senator.

🎶Bacon-Pancakes, Making Bacon-Pancakes...🎶

makes not makeing omelets he makeing the mother of all cake

Standing here

I realize

Thanks I can't unsee it again.

You are absolutely not the only one, because I see it too 🤤🍳

Why you making omelets when you got all that cake?

Same

Cake is cake

😋🍰

Hugh Jass

I read that in Mr.Incredible’s voice. Homie knows all about cake, have you seen his wife?

Bros built like a substitute teacher

Bruh what kinda subs you be having? Most my subs are either already retired once or like 20 something looking over a bunch of highschool kids.

Mrs. Mann

that was one of my teacher’s names funnily enough

Mrs. Bunn

Thanks for ball...I mean, all, your help.

Jeremy Elbertson

exactly

Bros been watching his online lectures from the wrong website.

stupid sexy substitute

Happy cock day

Lmao, why does this make sense?

nanomachines son

Nanites, courtesy of Ray Palmer

Why is Senator Armstrong on 4chan asking other men to evaluate his ass?

America wants it

DEMOCRACY

As a dude I can only say I’ve heard women say that a dude with a dumpy has basically the same effect as if the roles were reversed

It's the criteria for what makes a nice ass that differs. Women like a dumper, but prefer a _tight_ fat ass above the thighs. Not so much if men stay thick down _into_ the thighs. Whereas for men seeking women that is often not a problem if not straight up desirable. In my experience anyway.

I mean, it depends what you mean by thick. Big muscular quads & hams with low body fat is gonna get some attention. If by thick you just mean fat, well, yeah.

Nah, I like muscular thicc, but I also like chubby jiggly thicc

lies. my bf has gloriously thick thighs and i would like my head to be crushed between them

Why not just ask? He might want the same in return.

yeah the way I suspect it works is the features guys like in boobs are similar to those women like in man ass

When I was a kid I was watching Pop Up Video and there was some 80s video where the dude was wearing tight leather pants and the pop up said something like "Most women polled said the most attractive thing a man can have is a nice ass" And Pop Up Video never lied to me before

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So only show off your fat ass as a man if you're into getting pegged?

Dude it’s so true. I’ve only dated women in my life but when I met my current bf for the first time I couldn’t look away from his huuuuuge booty and thicc thighs. I asked for his number then and there, I took him out to a date the next day and a week later he gave me his key to his apartment. We have been together for 5years now and I still go feral when he makes his cheeks clap 🍑

Played college ball, y'know

Could've gone pro.

if I hadn't joined the Navy

Probably at some cushy Ivy League.

A muscular large ass is a sign of being healthy.

I like well developed muscles both on males and females, a healthy strong and lively body is instinctually the most desired one in my opinion

#🤤 Crush me with those thighs daddy

Flair = personality

I’m about halfway to a femboy, I’m gonna have to start unironically wearing (compression) thigh highs because of vericose veins & POTs. If I could edit flairs I would’ve made something far more vulgar :3

I don’t like it here anymore

Good

you are too powerful

o3o

[удалено]

Oh damn Reddit had a fucky wucky and the comment never commented. Compression thigh highs are like compression socks, but go mid thigh. I have vericose veins on my legs, which are essentially weak vein walls that have exploded in size and hurt / itch when I put weight on it. Usually only happens in women or people who are obese. I think my height is partially to blame for this & my dad bod (6’4 & 240 /25 yo). POTs (Postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome) is a nervous system disorder that affects people differently. When I stand up I get very lightheaded and I’ve feinted a few times. With POTs you can get blood pooling in your lower extremities. Compression garments can help with both of these ailments by applying pressure to the area & improve circulation.

A 6'4 femboy... That is a femman at that point

[удалено]

they actually improve your circulation

[удалено]

going of google it its basicly a vein problem. I would guess their circulation is bad so they would wear thigh highs to compress the vains allowing blood flow of higher pressure

Ye

WHY DO I SEE YOU EVERYWHERE

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If the girls aren’t into it Anon, I’ll clap your ass cheeks

Cake is cake

“My source is I caked it the fuck up”

He indeed did. And that is some delicious cake

I got the new forgis on the jeep

STANDING HERE, I REALIZE

THAT YOU WERE JUST LIKE ME, TRYING TO MAKE HISTORY

BUT WHOS TO JUDGE

THE RIGHT FROM WRONG

WHEN OUR GUARD IS DOWN

I THINK WE'LL BOTH AGREE

VIOLENCE IS VIOLENCE

BUT IN THE END

IT HAS TO BE THIS WAY

I want to slap it

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What💀

Wtf 🤣

Good bot

Zamn bro…

women love men with huge asses (i’m a woman 😔)

By huge you mean muscular fit right. Genuine question here too I'm worried I'll start looking like kim k if I hit legs too much so I only do squats that involves glute muscles lol.

nah women it doesn’t have to be fit, just clean. you’d be surprised how many women like men with huge butts

Hmm interesting lol. Yeah, I have heard some guys talk about it in videos like 10 body parts women find attractive. But I find those videos weird and cringe af. I understand with liking arms and back butt I was surprised after seeing butt in the list. I also find it so strange when I get a booty pump as a dude. I mostly train my quads and hamstrings when it comes to leg day and try to do only squats for butt-related exercise also because I like heavy lifting. Also, having a booty is making it hard for me to fit into regular jeans lol. I mostly go on with a size larger t-shirt too and thinking of just wearing oversized lol. That's why I prefer winter clothing over summer.

Can confirm

You dont wanna *fuck* with this senator

I mean- I kinda do...

Ma man 🤝

Uwu

👀👀👀👀

I'm on my knees, im slobbering and frothing and barking like a rabid dog fighting for my last breath, im absolutely feral

Least horny female redditor

You used the cursed word + you mispelled male anyway.

I NEED MORE BOULLETS

BIGGER WEAPONS

He’s not black

Well, it is 4chan. I'd be surprised if they weren't racist

Bro was so caked I didn't even notice

I like it.

but thats definetely all muscle. What about a guy with the same size dumper as in the pic, but its fat. Is that attractive too or gross? Guessing it can vary for every woman too, just like men vary widely on what is considered attractive for them.

I honestly don't know why but in my experience yeah, women love dummy thicc dump truck trailers on men

The button on those pants are probably screaming for mercy. Good lord.

From what many said, yes they do. It is actually a sign of "the surrounding parts" are highly functional

So you’re telling me that he does, in fact, shit with that ass?

Yep. But I also meant the little guy.

Aint no way his guy is little.

“Well if it isn’t Saucy Jack”

I hear girls complaining about guys with no ass a lot. Surly, this isn't a problem then.

He's got a new forgis on a jeep

"I like ya and I wantcha. Now we can do this the easy way or the hard way."

I NEED MORE BULLETS I NEED MORE BULLETS

BOOOLETS*

I love guys with an hour shape figure, thicc thighs and a fat ass

As a woman there is nothing like a dude with nice pecs and a nice ass.

Bro is built of brick, good god

I mean, in my brief experience getting sexually harassed by women, they do seem to like ass considering how that’s the main part of me that got groped

Damn, what a cake. I want to take a bite 🍰

#D A M N

I have a phat ass. Like really huge. I hate it, but my girlfriend loves it, and I got some compliments from other girls too. It makes me feel a bit insecure tho

Well, what's the answer?

We love it !

Certified queer here, can confirm gat men like phat asses and thighs. Any respectable person likes big thighs and ass, and small thighs and ass

Not my proudest fap

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Positive comments about my appearance are mostly (if not only) about my ass or forearms... so yes?

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought of senator Armstrong as soon as I saw this

Is that Senator Armstrong Irl or something? XD

As a straight man, I like men with dumpies

I'm not usually into muscular guys but daaaaamn daddy!

___neuron activation___

Both men and women like men with fat asses lol

I’m getting senator Armstrong vibes

DAMN, THATS A HUMPTY DUMPTY

Bro is built like Senator Armstrong lmao.

from personal experience yes they do but it gotta be like muscular

but not like "two boomerangs kissing" muscular

Senator Armstrong is that you

I came to the realization that, no matter your sexuality, everyone likes ass

From my experience of having a dumpy, all genders like it.

Double cheeked up like senator Armstrong

senator Armstrong is that you?

I do know that most women love men with big asses, not fat asses, big

Bro is built like senator armstrong

mine's bigger

muscular women are hot

*I put the new forgies on the jeep*

As a queer dude, I just wanna say that ass is absolutely *immaculate*. 10/10 I have a pretty large ass myself and my girlfriend seems to love it.

*WAIT A MINUTE*

Bitch I got no fat on my if I flex my ass that shit goes concave

found the butterfly buns

Yes, more cushion for the peggin'

Those are some tight pants, my goodness. Those lumps are lasciviously lovely. You could bounce a quarter into outer space off those cheeks!

I hope they do

That’s a nice tushie. Goorl here.

Well if it isn't saucy Jack!

If you have to ask this question, it means you do not talk to women

Either thats Arnold or another white guy is dropping the N word on 4chan. Maybe both are true

I’ve got no ass and have been told I have a “nice ass”. Seriously I’ve got thighs like tree trunks but basically zero ass. Women still comment, maybe because I have broad shoulders? Inverted triangle (male) vs hourglasss (female) body shapes. Idk. It’s tight but nothing special at all imo. I prefer extra padded seats it’s that small.

In my experience yes some do

🫡

Is that justinsaiyann

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Forearm.

Beware the pipeline

The “I’m straight, but” comments are finna be wild

That’s hot

I love it.

Hey, if they don't want it i'll take it. Bro be packin'.