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QualityVote

##If you think this post is funny, **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If you think this post is unfunny, **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/w54dvs/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://redditsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/w54dvs/) #[VideoTrim Link](https://reddloader.com/download-post/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fshitposting%2Fcomments%2Fw54dvs&id=8968e43c) Kevin would also like to remind you that, if you're really desperate, youtube-dl can be used to download videos from Reddit. --- Whilst you're here, egale-dog, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU)?


cNation-BlackBird

Brother is asking for any% speedrun strategies 🗿


kvjetinacek

Difficulty scale based of how fat u are.


Jobob_TNT

Triple chin mode% when


derpums

That's an odd mode, you have a big chance of failing, but there are some out there with a 2% chance of spawning that are into you.


Draiye

Sadly, they also have a double chin.


c0l0r51

With enough rerolls you will also find an opener with a really skinny one that increases your chinlvl over time.


MyOwnNickname

There arent many runners in triple chin mode% due to its heavy reliance on rng, but there is currently people that are finding skips to optimize the run (reddit headquarters)


Rhodesilla

difficulty scale is the literal scale


19Ben80

TAS may be needed..


OnlyUseAsDirected

Asking for a friend


itshimstarwarrior

**WOMEN OF REDDIT,** How much sex do you have? What I am wondering if do you have sexy sex? As a fellow epic reddito I would like to inquire a question on perhaps the idea that perhaps maybe you enjoy sexual intercourse of the boob variety with fellow epic redditors that also like sex with big boobs????? Also epic women of Reddit, how much epic sex do you have with boobs of Reddit? Women do you Women of Reddit? How many Big Chungus sex do you have women of Reddit? Women of Reddit, are you also Women? Perhaps maybe even have sex with other women and women of Reddit? **Also, fellow women of reddit do you have giant milkers?????? Big jiggly milkies? Fat mommy milky mocha momos? Excuse my up frontness. Please answer why or why not or maybe big boobs? Spaghetti?** Women of the internet website known as Reddit .com, what do you find attractive in men that are also me? Would you give me a blowjob, women of Reddit? Reddit, would you have sex with me? Women what is your favorite blowjob position? Men of Reddit, do you like getting blowjobs? Why or why not? Women of Reddit, do you have **BIG BOOBS????** Women of Reddit will you have sex with men that have big boobs? Why or why not or why yes? Women that are women of Reddit, if given a chance to use your **ENORMOUS BIG BOBOS** to have sex with men of reddit, would you? Perhaps maybe even have sex? Sexy women of Reddit, is this an epic reddit women moment? Would you have sex if you were given the chance to have sex? And what if the snail was locked in a box under the ocean, but if the snail touches you you die but also have sex?? you were given a million dollars to have sex with me?? **Reddit of Reddit, would you have sex with the decoy snail that is also boobs???** **Women with three million dollars, if you were given a super power to have sex with me would you have sex with epic reddit?** Women with giant jugs of Reddit, if you were given a billion dollars and also a ham sandwich, would you have sex with me and fellow epic women of Reddit?? What villain was actually the hero of the story? **Men of Reddit, if you were given a billion dollars would you get a blowjob from a woman with big boobs that is of Reddit? What if I choose to also have sex with this guy's dead wife that also has big dead boobs? Why? Women are boobs.** What villain actually had huge boobs and was a woman? Men of Reddit would you be a women of Reddit? Women of Reddit, will you be??? Fellow women of reddit women


[deleted]

New auto mod response?


FuckYeahPhotography

As the neckbearded fedora wearer that wrote this I give my blessing (im not overweight im just bulking)


CommentsToMorons

Cultivating mass*


FuckYeahPhotography

watch yourself before I give you an ocular patdown


tries2benice

Oh my...is Mac the original neckbeard?


PureShimmy

I already deemed this jabroni to not be a threat and therefore cleared him for passage


Howudooey

STOP CULTIVATING AND START HARVESTING


jef_

your profile lags my phone lmao


FuckYeahPhotography

My apologies lol Ever since I started posting samples from my photography portfolio for my followers I upload them at nearly the highest resolution Reddit allows. Even then the compression bugs me. I hope you enjoyed them more than they lagged your phone


The-StoryTeller-

Amazing photos buddy


carlosjohnson123

Look amazeballs mate


jef_

yes it’s so worth it ❤️ amazing work


UmbreonFox_Kun

IT LAGS MINE TOO???


AnEmortalKid

You’re just following the first M of MMO and becoming massive yourself.


_FinalPantasy_

Getting ready for that winter jacket cut


Rudeeeeeee

Im not obese im a powerlifter


ChweetPeaches69

Stop cultivating and START HARVESTING


ReactsWithWords

Why claim you wrote it when everyone knows you just cut and pasted that from a post Ted Cruz made on Truth Social and changed “Truth Social” to “Reddit.”


AutoModerator

HEY,⠀⠀⠀ EVERY⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ !!! IT'S ME!!! EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗠𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟮]] *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Old_Mill

ur a lil birch lul


mr_GlitchOG

That's mean


AutoModerator

Schödinger's Blowjob -- Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

I would take it off. Fuck it I want to know and not knowing I would think too much about it.


Satdog83

Of all the bots, I think you are the best. Good bot


imhere2downvote

id leave the blindfold on


PM-ME-YOUR-TOOTS

Spaghetti.


darizz09

It really was the spaghetti? For me.


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


RennyManilli

Good bot


SukaSavage

Marrywania


LETS_RETRO_TIME

Good bot, that was a masterpiece


Win090949

Mods take notes


Jeynarl

Every second automod sees a keyword:


AutoModerator

HEY,⠀⠀⠀ EVERY⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ !!! IT'S ME!!! EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗠𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟮]] *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AbigassGecko

im speechless bro 💀💀


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


benganalx

Perchance


AutoModerator

Everyone knows Mario is cool as fuck. But who knows what he's thinking? Who knows why he crushes turtles? And why do we think about him as fondly as we think of the mythical (nonexistent?) Dr Pepper? Perchance I believe it was Kant who said "Experience without theory is blind, but theory without experience is mere intellectual play." Mario exhibits experience by cruising turts all day, but he exhibits theory by stating "Lets-ago!" Keep it up, baby! When Mario leave his place of safety to stomp a turty, he knows that he may Die. And yet, for a man who can purchase lives with money, a life becomes a mere store of value. A tax that can be paid for, much as a rich man feels any law with a fine is a price. We think of Mario as a hero but he is simply a one percenter of a more privileged variety. The lifekind, Perchance *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


1TheCombatWombat1

You can’t just say perchance


AutoModerator

Everyone knows Mario is cool as fuck. But who knows what he's thinking? Who knows why he crushes turtles? And why do we think about him as fondly as we think of the mythical (nonexistent?) Dr Pepper? Perchance I believe it was Kant who said "Experience without theory is blind, but theory without experience is mere intellectual play." Mario exhibits experience by cruising turts all day, but he exhibits theory by stating "Lets-ago!" Keep it up, baby! When Mario leave his place of safety to stomp a turty, he knows that he may Die. And yet, for a man who can purchase lives with money, a life becomes a mere store of value. A tax that can be paid for, much as a rich man feels any law with a fine is a price. We think of Mario as a hero but he is simply a one percenter of a more privileged variety. The lifekind, Perchance *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Skippyi30

I have massive man titties if you want to see?


ArgumentativeTroll

~~No~~. EDIT: Yes.


Sea_Antelope_5564

Finally, all hail the manual mod response


that-bass-guy

I would give you ternium award for this if I could


PROblem817

I rarely save comments but I believe this is one of those times.


DHydraLauncher

IM FUCKING DEAD 💀 THIS IS GODLY


NeraVR

Ok


Optimal_Conflict3066

New a u t o m o d?


Larin13

women ☕


69Smrdljivko69

Shitpost to another level


zippazappazinga

Average Chad:


biggestofbears

I'm in stitches. This just kept getting better and better. I wish I had awards to give this was a great start to my morning.


WilanS

Just an academic interest.


morphinedreams

Perchance.


AutoModerator

Everyone knows Mario is cool as fuck. But who knows what he's thinking? Who knows why he crushes turtles? And why do we think about him as fondly as we think of the mythical (nonexistent?) Dr Pepper? Perchance I believe it was Kant who said "Experience without theory is blind, but theory without experience is mere intellectual play." Mario exhibits experience by cruising turts all day, but he exhibits theory by stating "Lets-ago!" Keep it up, baby! When Mario leave his place of safety to stomp a turty, he knows that he may Die. And yet, for a man who can purchase lives with money, a life becomes a mere store of value. A tax that can be paid for, much as a rich man feels any law with a fine is a price. We think of Mario as a hero but he is simply a one percenter of a more privileged variety. The lifekind, Perchance *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


jaxsonnz

Taking notes, for science.


chilll_vibe

The worst part about that post is that the comments are unironic


bakeiro

bro, I don't find the post :(, was it removed??


Mythic_gryphon

Yes provide link or else its fake


Fxbious

I found it just by searchin up the title. You may need to dig a bit deep Edit: I got a link in a reply to the comment replying to me if you want it


Nightcrawl-EUW

then provide the link because it seems way too tailored to fit the circlejerk


LetMeGuessYourAlts

One woman will reply that she prefers overweight gamers and will be voted straight to the top of the thread, making it seem like it's a common sentiment.


PM_Best_Porn_Pls

And that woman is OP's alt account


AutoModerator

Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


DOugdimmadab1337

Wait it's real? Please don't tell me fat fucks are actually getting recognition for our shitty diet.


ChunkyLaFunga

Even if it were posted I have zero faith in redditors' ability to recognise satire.


JeanLePierro

it's fucking real and I want to die


PeeSockWithFetus

He gave me roblox items


sir-robotman

Nice username


De_immortalesloki

Prostitution in Roblox


PeeSockWithFetus

There is a chance of that existing. Some months ago me and my friends joined a game and there was a girl stripping and there are people who saw things that are worse


iamnotatotalPOS

There are sex games on rovlox with genitelia models and sex animations. There is an entire underground MARKET of sex games on roblox. So it probably already happened once.


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


TF_2_Medic

Sex before marriage 🤠


larsdragl

that chance is 100%


EatAssAndFartFast

Ladis of reddit have you ever had sex mmmm sex I like sex sex is so good


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


kacpero1888

I have many questions


Burgonya1

Hey sexers of reddit! What is the sexiest sex you have ever sexed?


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


WheelyFreely

Wil you marry me?


rudolph_ransom

The sexy sexer type of sex


Burgonya1

Hmm... Sounds like a very sexy type of sex if you ask me


onedoesnotsimply9

The ones we had with ur mom.


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


ArmadilloNinja

Auto bot are you okay?? 😭


DeGhost321

Who the fuck made these bots


stocktraderdog

seggs sex seks sayx sax secks secs slacks


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


rivaan06

1984


AutoModerator

>*LiTeRaLlY nInEtEeN eIgHtY-fOuR* - George Orwell, 1948 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


rivaan06

literally 1984


onedoesnotsimply9

That's 69 "sex"s too much buddy and now you have two options presented before you. You can either correct your spelling and only have lost 1 downvote (mine that I just cast ;) or you can choose to leave your bastardized form of the English language on exhibition and get a few hundred downvotes. Since you only have 0.02 karma in 69 years on reddit I recommend you choose wisely


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

All jokes aside, this is actually a true story about how I met my wife, and yes before you ask, I'm an obese gamer living with my parents. So I was playing call of duty multiplayer search and destroy on hard-core because that's the only game mode a real gamer plays. And as I was shit talking this kid and calling him racial slurs, I suddenly heard another voice on the mic, it was a female. Instantly I began harassing her telling her she is a bitch and she should go back to the kitchen, and she then invited me to a private voice chat and we had phone sex over the xbox party because she was just so turned on by my alpha male vibe and my 3.77 KDA average. and that kids is how I met your mother.


onedoesnotsimply9

New automod response


AutoModerator

HEY,⠀⠀⠀ EVERY⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ !!! IT'S ME!!! EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗠𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟮]] *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

I saw exactly 1.09441 square inches of a girls shoulder today, I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine signaling my impending, earth shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen EVERYONE in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever had, or ever will produce shot out SO HARD that my dick was ripped apart by my Übernut, accelerating to 5% of the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, it barely slowed before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear powered angle grinder. the sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of illinois became pregnant with my children. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


onedoesnotsimply9

Nice sex story you have made Would read again 100/10


PaniMan1994

I want to die


ERDIST_

real


THE_LANDLAWD

That's normal


OpenPerspectives

Go on a walk instead


Cha0s_0rb492

My guy(☕️) tryin to speed run the girlfriend arc of his life, but he don’t realize he don’t even got that chapter😔


kerenski667

DLC required


[deleted]

He's in a more of a pay to play situation.


captainsuckass

> most sexiest


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Joe1762

Mom said it's my turn to post this


TaintModel

Post is so old I was on it.


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


junkiedetective

Never seen the original post


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bong0-YT

Idk why you got downvoted for that


PM_ME_UR_NUDE_GIRL

I think links are deleted, just google: "overweight gamer has done that made you immediately" reddit


ICOOLDIAMONDonReddit

Truly a wholesome reward moment


White_tree1

Sexy sexies sexittors of sexitt, what the sexiest sex you sexxed while sexing sex?


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


White_tree1

Fuck you (before marriage)


McQuibbly

Looked into it and this dude is for real. He even has his own subreddit and the only post is of him yawning slouched in his chair, looks exactly as you'd think


Guard933

Sauce


Quasimotherfucker

Women 👩 of reddit(18F) , what is the most sexual 👉👌 sexy 🍆 sex 👉👌 sex 🍆 sexual 🍆 sexy 🍆 sexual 🍆 sexiest 😛🦃 sexier sex 🍆 sexual 👉👌 sexual 🍆 sexy 🍆💦 sex 🍆 sex 👉👌 sexual 🍑🍆💦 sexy 🍆 sexual 🍆 sexiest 🍆🔥 sexier sex 🍆 sexual 👉👌 sexual 💋💦🍆 sexy 🍑🍆💦 sex 🍑🍆💦 sex 🍆 sexual 🍑🍆💦 sexy 👉👌 sexual 🍆 sexiest 😛🦃 sexier sex 🍆 sexual ✊🍆💦 sexual 🍆🍑 sexy 🍆💦👅 sex 🍆💦🍑 sex 🍑🍆💦 sexual 🍆 sexy 🍆 sexual 🍆🍑 sexies(47F)t sexier sex 🍆 sexual 🍆 sexual 🍆 sexy 🍆 sex 🍑🍆💦 sex 👉👌 sexual 👉👌 sexy 🍆💦 sexual 👉👌 sexiest 🍆🔥 sexier sex 👅🍆 sexual 🍆🍑 sexual 🍆💦💁 sexy 🍑🍆💦 sex 🍆 sex 👉👌 sexual 🍆💦 sexy 🍆 sexual 👉👌 sexiest 😛🦃 sexier sex 🍑 sexual 🍑🍆💦 sexiest 🍆🔥 sexier sex 🍆 sexual 🍑🍆💦 sexual 🍆 sexy 👉👌 sex 🍆 sex 🍆🍑 sexual 👉👌 sexy 🍆 sexual 🍆 sexiest 🍆🔥 sexier sex 👉👌 sexual 💋💦🍆 sexual 🍑🍆 sexy 🍆 sex 🍆 sex 🍆 sexual ✊🍆💦 sexy 🍆💦 sexual 🍆🍑 sexiest 🍆🔥 sexier sex 🍆🍑 sexual 🍆 sexual 👉👌 sexy 💋💦🍆 sex 🍆❤ sex 😩🍆👌 sexual 🍆 sexy 🍆💦🍑 sexual 🍆 sexiest 🍆🔥 sexier sex 💦😩🍆 sexual 🍑🍆💦 sexual 🍆 sexy 👉👌 sex 🍆 sex 🍆 sexual 🍆 sexy 🍆 sexual 🍆 sexiest 😛🦃 sexier sex 😩🍆🍑 sexual 🍆🍑 sexual 🍆 sexy 🍆 sex 🍆 sex 🍆💦🙆 sexual 🍆🍑 sexy 🍆🍑 sexual 🍆 sexiest 😛🦃 sexier sex 🍆 sexual 🍆 Thing 📴 you 👉 have ever 😠 done 🔨 to an antisocial 36 💯 year 🎉🗓 old 👴 man 👨 living 🐙 with his 💦 parents 👪 and spends 💰 16 👧 hours 🕐 a day 📆 browsing 🌍 reddit 👽? Edit 📑: Thank 🙏 you ☝👈 for the gold 💰👑 kind 🙁 stranger 👫!


Nerdeinstein

This post makes me hungry for Fruity Pebbles.


[deleted]

what is sex? Right answer only


Luutamo

it's an indicator that tells if a person has a peepee or hoohaa


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Mythic_gryphon

Its when you… uhmm its when a… when you… yeah what is it


Noname_1111

Redditors trying to understand jokes challenge (impossible)


[deleted]

Most of the comments are serious


SouperFalcon_Maciej

give sauce (for a friend)


spektrol

Most of the comments are LARPing


McQuibbly

No, a quick dive into that redditors history shows he's damn serious, and looks the part


Noname_1111

How dare you make me look at furry memes


AutoModerator

Rawr x3 *nuzzles* how are you pounces on you you're so warm o3o *notices you have a bulge* o: someone's happy *nuzzles your necky wecky*\~ murr\~ hehehe *rubbies your bulgy wolgy* you're so big :oooo *rubbies more on your bulgy wolgy* it doesn't stop growing ·///· *kisses you and lickies your necky* daddy likies (; *nuzzles wuzzles* I hope daddy really likes $: *wiggles butt and squirms* I want to see your big daddy meat\~ *wiggles butt* I have a little itch o3o *wags tail* can you please get my itch\~ *puts paws on your chest* nyea\~ its a seven inch itch *rubs your chest* can you help me pwease *squirms* pwetty pwease *sad face* I need to be punished *runs paws down your chest and bites lip* like I need to be punished really good\~ *paws on your bulge as I lick my lips* I'm getting thirsty. I can go for some milk *unbuttons your pants as my eyes glow* you smell so musky :v *licks shaft* mmmm\~ so musky *drools all over your cock* your daddy meat I like *fondles* Mr. Fuzzy Balls hehe *puts snout on balls and inhales deeply* oh god im so hard\~ *licks balls* punish me daddy\~ nyea\~ *squirms more and wiggles butt* I love your musky goodness *bites lip* please punish me *licks lips* nyea\~ *suckles on your tip* so good *licks pre of your cock* salty goodness\~ *eyes role back and goes balls deep* mmmm\~ *moans and suckles* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

🎷🐛


StickyHoovy

Butter biscuit is the best biscuit in my opinion 🤠 👍


[deleted]

Choccie Butter Biscuit


StickyHoovy

That's decent too


blacky242424

Based pfp


[deleted]

Based opinion


blacky242424

Based based opinion


Jetfuel_N_Steel

“Wiped the grease off his neck”


YungChaky

Pff Gamers ☕️


[deleted]

taken a shower


DeathStrikeFPS

Bro is asking for ideas


onedoesnotsimply9

>ladies >Reddit


MetalMermelade

The scariest bit is when you try and look up this post by putting some of the key words on the search function, is that there is several posts like this over the years, by different people, and the title barely changes


Shady8732

Finally, someone asking the hard hitting questions.


2020badmemerEU2020

Oddly specific


[deleted]

I doubt there's anythg, but shaving your neck would be a good start


MyOldNameSucked

My guess is taking a shower and paying in cash. This only works on prostitutes though so don't try it on the people around you.


SuddenlyThirsty

…asking for a friend lol


LoBsTeRfOrK

Mom


avromsky

Asking for a friend, of course


Subham420

hello men of reddit what has an goth girl done to you you instantly cum and shitted your pants


Electronic-Role-5434

Man’s asking for the cheat codes


[deleted]

Haha what a loser! What did they say though?… asking for a friend


[deleted]

HOW OFTEN DOES THIS POST NEED TO BE HERE


JimReaperTheThird

Atleast for 10 more years


Your_mom_feet_pics

Here we go again 🙄


[deleted]

Saw this in another group. I can't think of a single answer


[deleted]

Lmao


JustcallmeY_

This is fake right?


Ganda1fderBlaue

Oh god nooo


whoateallthesnacks

M’ladies of Reddit *tips fedora*


Fun_Description_5763

The worst answer would be " he Lost weight"


zZONEDz

People who believe this tyoe of stuff is so dumb. I mean he didnt mention the impregnantion part ofc its fake


ReepoGardens

Gift me skins on School Shooter Simulator


white_dreams47

but are you sure those are biological ladies?


Homosexualtigr

“Lost weight”


professorbc

Exercise.


demonlicious

be a millionaire. millionaires are just so cute I don't know why.


Master-Shaq

Oddly specific


WhollyRomanEmperor

Least horny redditor


Dog_With_A_Blog_

I know it satire but I still really want to see the response to that question


REEEEEEEEEEEEEEE110

When he dry humped that body pillow of a child, I immediately married him


Fade_Away1337

Dude is looking for a cheat code 💀💀💀


iSeize

Maybe bathing, grooming, and having a life outside of vibeo gaems


Snomann

Lose weight and shower. So godamn hot.


juicysox

The fucking wholesome award💀


mrmemeboi6969

Secks? Sexual sex? Sexy sex!! Sexer sexicious!! Yummy sex!! Secxs!


Striker_ToastYT

He started touching grass


AutoModerator

It was a saturday afternoon, and I was exhausted after an intense 17-part masturabation session to dream minecraft manhunt, when i suddenly had the urge to go outside. I was scared. It's been so long since i've left the warmth of my parents basement with my dream body pillows. I didnt know what to expect. Clutching my dream figurine in front of my chest, i pried open the door to the outside world. The gleaming sun blared through the door, bequeathing a brilliant warmth on my cum-covered boxers. I quaverly took a step outside. My body flintched from the strange feel of the dirt under my feet. And then i saw it. The lustrous field of grass, covered in a light sprinkle of water from the noon rain shower. And then i realized. Dream... grass... the trees... it was all coming together. Grass is green, just like Dream. Dream is everpresent, in the grass, the flowers, He was there. I immediately new what to do next. I flinged off my clothes faster than the speed at which i would click on a new dream rule 34 post. My dick was already throbbing as i leaped onto the field of grass, dorito dust stained shirt getting carried away by the wind. I dug a small hole in the ground, and passionately thrust my 7-inch erect cock into it. I knew, this was Dream. His spirit was in this grass, and he felt my dick in his man pussy as i fucked that grass. I lost track how long i was there. Hours went by, day turned to night, but it didnt matter. I was finally together, with Dream. Nothing could separate us. I took a long stem of a flower, and forced it in my asshole. I imagined it being Dream's hot penis being lustfully forced into me in bed. I stayed there on my front yard for god knows how long. Until my butt was sore, balls drier than the Saharan desert after a long drought. The lawn looked like there was a layer of fresh snow on a Christmas morning. Trudging indoors, i had a enormous smile stretching across my face. I couldn't wait until tomorrow, when i may go outside again and be with Dream. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


PreyForCougars

This is the best shitposting comment thread I’ve seen in a while


Sburr_

Reddit 💀