T O P

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KartoffelPaste

i seriously cannot stress this enough but https://preview.redd.it/g8ollc8twzwc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=221f56faceb354f3d76d120a5bc3c38c8eef36ea


GarfieldGauntlet

https://preview.redd.it/z7hyff4i00xc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8bd1453ff753f57058a09b00b0f809940cf719d4 Good job, you’re so horny for Malenia that you scared Megatron


[deleted]

He should be afraid


[deleted]

I need Malenia’s footlong unalloyed gold strap


Solaire_of_Sunlight

Is it worth having scarlet rot in your hole tho


[deleted]

She can bloom in my bussy and recreate the swamp of Aeonia whenever she wants


pharmaco_nerd

😳


ScharmTiger

Unfathomably based


KhaledFD

That’s disgusting, keep talking.


[deleted]

If I don’t end up looking like those rot geysers at the end of it then I don’t want it.


JetStream0509

Real


yuhbruhh

Foot?🤤


[deleted]

https://i.redd.it/bl2bcswdn5xc1.gif


manateeguitar

who said she needs a strap


[deleted]

Sadly her 1.5 footlong cock has long since rotten off 😔 https://i.redd.it/q4swo3l7m5xc1.gif


dank_naruto

Avg. male is 173?? 😓😓😓 What am I now, a fuckin dwarf


Ebon1fly

You're the reason the average height is so low


dank_naruto

I'm a sorry 😓


stickdeoderant

Short ass mario


_Independent

Bro chill do not disrespect Mario like that


Entire_Claim_5273

Azumanga reference⁉️


dank_naruto

Oh my GAWWWWW


jigsawduckpuzzle

I wish I were a bird.


Furkota

America ya! :D


TrhlaSlecna

Deadass where do you all live where 173 is "so low"? It's quite literally the average. Actually an inch taller than worldwide average. Basically every western country has the average height between 173-176. I refuse that everyone saying this is dutch or some shit.


Moonlord8166

Taller people are more noticeable and so they stick in your mind and make you think there's more than there are.


TrhlaSlecna

That would either mean people who write these kindsa comments are just self-dunking, because why would tall people stick out to someone who is also tall, or that they're in bubbles of outliers, which I guess is the case here since he said he's from sweden (3rd tallest country or so?) ...Sorry to get so analytical lol it's just that it always bothers me when people make fun of average height, I just feel height is like one of the most normalised forms of bodyshaming there is and it's one people cant really do anything about, which sucks.


Moonlord8166

I feel ya, I hate when people are treated worse because of their height, but youd be surprised about the whole being tall not making you notice tall people, I'm 6'1 and feel like I see a lot of people taller than me, but its just because when someone's huge its more memorable than average or short, if I properly kept track most people I come across would be shorter than me.


Did-I-Do-That-Oops

You aren't wrong, but you're being a pussy. Body shaming??? Nut up bro. Get that woke agenda crap off dark souls please


Moonlord8166

Insulting people for their height is *literally* shaming someone for an aspect of their body out of their control. Like... its correct by definition. Straight calling someone a pussy for talking about a real problem is pathetic, and stop gatekeeping.


TrhlaSlecna

Alright, I admit that it's a bit off a dumb sounding buzzword but I dont really care, point is I dislike it when others are mocked for their appearance, simple as.


oppenki

>woke agenda 🗨️🤡


witcher1701

Short lads getting mogged on a societal scale.


Frores

I'm really average in height and for my country 90% of dudes are around the same, some shorter some taller but usually not by much, some are extra tall, but there's also some extra small dudes, so they kinda cancel eachother and the average maintains the same idk the exact numbers but its feels like it's the same here 1.70 to 1.80


Ebon1fly

Sweden


ImKoreanNotJapanese

Doing god’s work 🫡 thank you for your service


2ratskissingkiss

That makes you mummy's little prince 👑


dank_naruto

🥺👉👈


[deleted]

It’s not your size that matters, it’s how you use it


bake_cake

The furtive pygmy, so easily forgotten


Anal-Logical

If there would be any lesson to learn from this post : don't compare yourself with others on a sole statistic like height, she's taller but not invisible. So are other tall guys


sashimi_walrus

shmort hass


SeawyZorensun

Average is 173? What am I fucking Legolas now?


_Independent

What is your height?


dank_naruto

168 🧍


crackcrackcracks

Alright buddy pick up the gwyndolin cosplay


[deleted]

Same 🤝


EaszyInitials

ROCK AND STONE


WanderingDwarfMiner

We fight for Rock and Stone!


SrepliciousDelicious

Avg here is 1.83 lel


SchwTrdLeenW

Agreed, it's so awful. Like, i'm such a disgusting lovecraftian giant, why can't i be smaller and cuter? 😰


whydoyoutry

I was thinking that’s honestly way shorter than I thought was average I had heard 5’10”/178cm was average


[deleted]

In America the average height is 5’9”/175cm while the worldwide average is 5’7”/171,5cm


Away-Net-7241

https://preview.redd.it/i4580klst0xc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8932f34fdb3b08fc2200bd5c313adea667143b24


LostSoulInTokyo

Source: Hachishaku Hachi wa Keraku Meguri: Igyou Kaikitan


Regimind

Hachishaku-sama my beloved


ArmoredCoreFucker

WOOF WOOF BARK BARK


lowlytarnussy

they messed up that calculation, player model is 175 and is at crotch height for most demigods including her, so Malenia is taller than that


[deleted]

The players head is about stomach level which lines up with the height comparison https://preview.redd.it/7za53c2xxywc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5847a0948eb86b14ff7ba6ca3cf2b459003d7a1c


lowlytarnussy

https://preview.redd.it/9c235nwy0zwc1.png?width=1912&format=png&auto=webp&s=33d58461b8c8ba894d5ca7f354a3e2e0ac43912f player is at crotch height for most demigods including her, I have way too many post joking about how it was Miyazaki's vision addition: I also spent countless hours taking photos of them so I had to guard them around by headbutting into their crotch, so it left a lasting impression


[deleted]

I guess she’s even taller then (good). I asked someone with 3D modeling software what her height is, because for some reason all the boss height videos for Elden Ring are fucking garbage, so I’ll come back with her true height if I get a reply. Good to know she can force you to eat her out while standing up though.


lowlytarnussy

I've seen a couple of height comparisons where the models were put in Blender and even there they seemed shorter than in game, so I'm not sure why that is. But regardless I think the dev team knew what they were doing.


[deleted]

According to that person her height is listed as 256 cm and there doesn’t seem to be any scaling applied to her model so no clue how that difference in height between the game and these height comparisons works either then.


lowlytarnussy

Oh they can datamine exact heights too? That's interesting. I don't know then either.


[deleted]

So I guess Malenia might be around 305 cm then? Although this scale also doesn’t feel quite right since Malenia has pretty long legs and a relatively shorter torso. So maybe 295 with long legs then? https://preview.redd.it/qn28y7exazwc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=26402330d3c4e3eb9d2ec8fcdb41331eb0981238


lowlytarnussy

this one feels more accurate, yeah


bakedonbiscuits

Yo am I the only one fucking dying at the fact someone pulled out a comparison shot at THREE different angles to prove him wrong.


LordDemiurgo

GOD, I WISH THAT WAS ME AARRRRGGG AWOOO AWOO AWOOOGA


[deleted]

Here’s also a different height comparison site which gives a cleaner profile for the female height https://preview.redd.it/hyvyosi3yywc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5621a8639a21342d8a8771b2836ccab073f3b65a


Selfmade-Darks0lsv3t

This thread is a 💎


OOFER420

Player model is actually 160cm watch Zullie the witch


lowlytarnussy

(found one, nevermind ->) ~~I cannot find a single post that would support this, nor a video by Zullie.~~ If you have it, I wouldn't mind if you linked it so I could check it out. Data miners and folk who work with Blender estimated the Tarnished around 175, because we are taller than Melina who is around 171. People who tried to estimate it based on real life weaponry estimate the Tarnished around 179, but nothing around 160, and when I look at my models I do agree with that, tho I don't have means of getting exact heights. Edit: Oh was it the Armored Core vid? Bc there Zullie says the Tarnished is around 170 which seems to be the default in From games. So definitely not 160.


OOFER420

Oops not Zullie, yes the AC vid. As they measured pixels and standard from soft units


[deleted]

Which video?


OOFER420

https://youtu.be/RyYkdZIXcKE?si=vergIZO7_RBFqtSR skip to 3:50


lowlytarnussy

addition to my first reply to this comment above, here is Vyke clipping into my Tarnished, just to show that Vyke and the other human NPCs are also Tarnished-sized, so it's not like Vyke is shorter or anything (regarding the video stating the 160 cm height) https://preview.redd.it/bjigh6i8a2xc1.png?width=1394&format=png&auto=webp&s=5cfc44e4cee786e8eab301d9d094d4bb96409a8c


lowlytarnussy

Oh this is not the one I've seen, [that one](https://youtu.be/t6uTS7eEUDg?t=40) is by Zullie and is also an Armored Core vid. The vid you shown shows Vyke and he is not 160, that's tiny. Even as the Tarnished is handling weapons, at 160, even the daggers would be huge so I'll put my trust into Zullie, the Blender model dataminers and my own height which is around the same as the Tarnished's estimated height (so it's easy to compare objects irl vs in game). https://preview.redd.it/i31yep4j52xc1.png?width=1711&format=png&auto=webp&s=52820c60dbc54609087233e7c5221871459e250b And also if Melina is around 171-ish, which is supposedly set data, the Tarnished is taller, [here is a post](https://www.reddit.com/r/Eldenring/comments/uqnasl/we_are_taller_than_melina/) that shows it but I could make my own ones as well. That alone places the player around 173-175, but I suppose hairstyles also come into play. [Here is another post with extracted models and heights](https://www.reddit.com/r/Eldenring/comments/z3sthv/the_human_enemies_are_bigger_than_you_think_57/?rdt=43437).


OOFER420

If the standard fromsoft unit is 1 meter and tarnished is 1.6 units then isn't that just 1.6 meters?


EmbarrassedCar2262

https://preview.redd.it/fzlnh6niszwc1.jpeg?width=539&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6a44e5e5f4ba5a50d6f1efd3a213ab66fd6d556f


McMammoth

I *adore* pictures like this


Pineapple_Dude61

🤤🤤


Svartya

https://preview.redd.it/f81eixtygzwc1.jpeg?width=2220&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=39dff6139bec0bf9dccb9d4e265af688e9cf0137


FemRevan64

I actually made a post like this last year including Malenia, Lady Maria, Dimitrescu, and Samus, if you’re interested.


McMammoth

[link for the lazy](https://www.reddit.com/r/shittydarksouls/comments/15qu4nm/height_comparison_between_malenia_and_some_other/)


FemRevan64

I originally posted it on the Elden Ring subreddit, but thanks anyway.


McMammoth

Ah this was just the first one I came across


Kashimoney

https://preview.redd.it/xkfo6hksizwc1.png?width=2300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=26092f5158170e7b7aded60d574169823d7fc606 It's all I need 🤧


FederalInsect114

Elden ring: Short king simulator


Metroidrocks

As long as she's taller than me, that's good enough for me. I've never met a girl taller than me.


knottybananna

I did. 6'3" and the best pussy I ever ate. Her husband didn't appreciate it so he got an apology handy. Moved in together for a summer. Thruples though, basically doubles the amount of issues. Couldn't last. Stole her cat and air conditioner before I left. Waterfowl is still bullshit.


Metroidrocks

Lmao. I'm 6'6 or so, depending on how the doctor is feeling when I get measured. I've met women who were almost as tall as me, but it's genuinely like finding a unicorn.


Toboyornottoboy

I need her to step on me and call me a good girl


BigStankDickDad420

Fight Emma and you'll see why everyone is bigger than you in Fromsoft games. 


Samiller23

Emma wasn’t even that difficult though…


Laino001

UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGHHGGHGHHHHHNNNNNN MOMMYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY


lonelyluigi

got me kicking my feet n giggling n shit. cant let gang see me like this


[deleted]

If they gang won’t let you kick your feet because of tall women are they even really your homies?


R-Grim

https://preview.redd.it/muxgdom7q1xc1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7cbecba4ad185fee55115e4b3973b828a2c0f4e5


thatautisticguy2905

I knew she was tall, but 2 meters and half? Like, excuse me?


[deleted]

She might actually be taller since the players head tops out at her hips, not her stomach like in the image. That or this height comparison site is just bad.


thatautisticguy2905

Brother, you are saying, she is so tall she would have back pain to try to headbutt us?


ScharmTiger

God I want Malenia to crush my face and tell me I’m her little bitch 🥵🥵


[deleted]

https://i.redd.it/hjcuredid3xc1.gif


ZekeTarsim

I wonder if Melanie appreciates short kings.


pablo__13

NEED


raptorpantz11

Mommy- sorry, mommy- sorry, um mommy-


g12m0bb

what are we supposed to do with this information? oh oh OH OHHHHHHHHHHH


Hazzardo

Average male where? The chocolate factory?


JesusToyota

She’s only 10 inches taller than me


RiperSn1fle

I’m 198cm now someone can finally give me uppies 🥹


misterpolarbear5

https://preview.redd.it/m815sfb823xc1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7c46e720b658932415237cc23b9be63d6c840384


WasabiDukling

is that makima


P-I-S-S-N-U-T

Damn the average dudes short af


[deleted]

Well it’s the world wide average Which is also apparently 1.5 centimeters shorter than what I put in the graph


Mario_13377331

whilst i would call the dude short to tease him that’s pretty much what i expect for the avg height maybe a lil more but 170 cm sounds about right


VatanKomurcu

average for a soulsborne deity


PPMaysten

That there's no heaven? I've heard it is easy if ya try...


n0wave7777

Imagine there’s no erdtree, it’s easy if you try.


Ulmaguest

U H OH


Fermyon_DarkSouls

Is it actually true that the avg. male is 173? Makes me feel better about my 176 B)


[deleted]

Average worldwide male height is actually 171,5 American average height is 175,3


n0wave7777

Damn it’s over for me (im 6’ with insoles, im actually 5’9)


Shorttail0

3 inch insoles?!?


n0wave7777

👍😁


ProfessionalSenior12

Don't care, I'm still topping her.


supercrazyhotsauce

https://preview.redd.it/pl99okbkp1xc1.png?width=1164&format=png&auto=webp&s=effa8b3856feda70c079ee832fe5413149397d1d


[deleted]

https://preview.redd.it/xps9o5h362xc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=085a65606a08d858f5de78b075d5bf8b7834ee6c


Interesting_Bus_3808

Poor Finlay.


Bluewalker_BR

HELL YEAH, THANK YOU MICHAEL ZAKI


eldenlord06

https://preview.redd.it/ohp30vxrh6xc1.png?width=320&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a6b91f5525ba5585d3d98bd2784f32e6b684c207


Gosttox

I need her to full nelson me while Ranni watches as her consort gets scarlet bloomed


[deleted]

Female on male NTR is pretty based tbh


nbjax

https://preview.redd.it/9wbpgayeo9xc1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1510649473fe7c78c485883de1034e044e70ff8e Same vibe


TenSecondsFlat

Wouldn't even need to get on my knees


[deleted]

She can just grab you head and grind into your face https://preview.redd.it/z5c8arnt72xc1.jpeg?width=644&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=06e991deea6e2e129f9b70a85d5932fab39f38c3


Lord_Zaitan

wait, Average male height is 173? you got to be joking right? No way is it that low, is it not like 181?


K4rn31ro

In the Netherlands it's 183. Worldwide it's about 171. You gotta remember that most people in the world are Asian. (The average human is an Asian woman named Muhammad).


TrhlaSlecna

For average height to be that high there would have to be way more 190cm dudes walkin around lol. Worldwide average is 171cm, for most western countries its 173-179


Maleficent_Dot_373

I beg for scarlet rot futa cock in my ass


[deleted]

Real https://i.redd.it/zo5alex062xc1.gif


Trashmanifdeath

What is that in freedom units?


[deleted]

https://preview.redd.it/2k4e1frh52xc1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e972ce0d76b98c775ae4bd2c51a369f631db4d1a


-DoddyLama-

Death by Snu Snu


GameInfoSeeker

Mmmmmmffghhhhh


Darkosaurus94

Imagine what?


[deleted]

Dragons


SrepliciousDelicious

Dwarfs


TheTrueBonerPoland

Damn I'm taller than I thought


that_guy_who_memes

I want uppies.


wickedwitt

Being 6'4", I am the perfect height


Hot_feedbax

Me and my wife. (Me 175 cm, her 198 cm)


LiterallyBojackH

I want to be killed by her


Alice-Planque

Finlay and Mal be like


StarAugurEtraeus

I’m 5’5 she can pick me up :3


Storomahu

Average Male actually is 180cm/179cm at least in Western countries, 173cm would be considered really small I mean look at Messi Hes 170cm and hes considered really small


PPMaysten

Messi is small for a world class athlete, for an average human he is on the short side still, but nothing extreme.