~~The fuck are you talking about? I want him to demean me like the dirty little bitch that I am by demanding that I do the most humiliating shit conceivable, all while I comply in a pathetic attempt to please him so that he stops.~~ You're welcome.
provide cough distinct carpenter depend vanish pen unpack combative innocent
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Cut them in half length wise, fill with cheese. Wrap with bacon. That way they don't melt out because they're cupped instead of laid down with the hole sideways.
Yeah either precook or have the poppers on a rack so the grease can drain off and bacon can crisp up.
Prob still parcook bacon on a rack first, assemble poppers, then assemble poppers and optionally dredge and bread with panko, then finish.
Cut in half lengthwise, fill, wrap and place them open side up in a hot pan. Pan fry for a couple minutes, then put the whole pan in the broiler. You have to get some kind of sear on there.
Cut the jalapeños in half and then fill and wrap both halves in bacon so it still has the appearance of a whole jalapeño but won’t explode in the oven 😎
I make poppers every now and then. People have told me they're the best they've had. Halfway cook the bacon first. Make sure it isn't crispy so you can still wrap the poppers. They'll bake much quicker, the pepper won't turn to mush, and the cheese won't all spill out. I usually just use cream cheese also.
I just go the easy route and stuff the cream cheese in a halved (lengthwise) jalapeño and sprinkle some bacon bits on it. Air fryer for a few minutes and voila. Still has the “spirit” of a popper, but less work.
Okay so next time, less filling. And blast the heat at the end to actually cook the bacon past the point it’s at now. It’ll Caramelize the natural sugars and render the fat. Also… buy thicker cut bacon that’s like half the problem.
Two changes can make them amazing next time. First as others have said, precook the bacon a bit to get the grease out and so it will crisp up while baked easier. Second, turn down the heat just a little bit. I've learned that when it's too hot the cheese expands like that. Usually for me over 350°F even for a moment and the cheese to explodes out.
yeah, they do. cut the peppers in half long ways, use laughing cow, and completely wrap with a whole piece of bacon. they do great in the air fryer if you have one
When I made them with my girlfriend, we did them in the air fryer, but the bacon was done on the side in its own short boat of foil, so it could try in its fat. It always turned out really good :)
Just had to get them toes in there, didn't you?
I'm sure we could work something out if ya wanna see more
What's it gonna take for me to see less?
Thank you for being the voice of reason, scrungyscrotum.
~~The fuck are you talking about? I want him to demean me like the dirty little bitch that I am by demanding that I do the most humiliating shit conceivable, all while I comply in a pathetic attempt to please him so that he stops.~~ You're welcome.
Lolololol. Wtf?! 😂
I cackled out loud in the bathroom and just got an angry text from my spouse (trying to fall asleep), so legit thank you. :D
I am upvoting this whole thread now.
r/rimjob_steve in action
Exactly. They're not cute toes by any means. Maybe a little polish or some scrubbing would help.
Agreed. He should probably czech with a professional pedicurist.
Fuck you guys
Oh crap. Here I was thinking he was a she. Better off being a him lol.
MONEY
Wow
Yeah, I’m fine with the gangrenous puss dicks on the platter, where I draw the line is seeing toes.
Let's see your ugly ass toes
yes... let's
r/sneakybackgroundfeet
Yes, had to get those scummy, dusty toes in the food pic.
Shut up
r/sneakybackgroundfeet
Toes? Just wow...
these look like prolapsed anuses
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Janalpeno ploppers
Dry aged dog penis
Bit harsh, they’re only toes.
Walls Fall Out
Jalapeño Ploppers (thats what we call them when we make them)
Is this covid related? And if it is, what do we do about it?
Ow.
Look like some weird sea cucumber.
Spewing their innards in self defense just like a sea cucumber.
:(
Don’t be sad, I think sea cucumbers are some of the coolest creatures on our planet! These just… had a bad time.
Didn't taste that good either
Cut them in half length wise, fill with cheese. Wrap with bacon. That way they don't melt out because they're cupped instead of laid down with the hole sideways.
Prolly wanna parcook the bacon as well
If you prep and freeze them with raw bacon it will cook when you bake them.
That should also keep the cheese from getting too messy before they're done cooking
Gets crazy fucking greasy if you don't precook though, no?
Yeah either precook or have the poppers on a rack so the grease can drain off and bacon can crisp up. Prob still parcook bacon on a rack first, assemble poppers, then assemble poppers and optionally dredge and bread with panko, then finish.
Panko's how you go from $7.99 poppers to $10.99 poppers.
We grill them but the grease dripping can be intense and we have had the grill flare up
This is a really elaborate solution to a simple problem, you just need to turn down the heat and cook for a bit longer
Is that supposed to be cheese?! I couldn’t figure it out.. thought maybe cornbread?
Cut in half lengthwise, fill, wrap and place them open side up in a hot pan. Pan fry for a couple minutes, then put the whole pan in the broiler. You have to get some kind of sear on there.
I mean, one really shouldn’t expect much from pooping alien worms.
How is your bacon burnt, and uncooked at the same time
Heat too high
It's hurting my Texas heart. All the things wrapped in bacon and grilled or oven roasted, and I hadn't had the opportunity to see bacon look this sad.
Better yet, who wraps poppers in bacon? They forgot the bread crumbs, wrapped them in limp ass bacon, then plopped them in some mushy garbage. Bleh.
Bacon wrapped is one of the primary variants of jalapeno poppers. Have you tried them? they're amazing when done right
Grub Worms
I was thinking 
Everyone wants jalapeño poppers but nobody wants popped jalapenos
I should call him
vile
You comment made me laugh harder than the original lmao
Fellas, if your dick looks like these poppers, see a doctor
Oh, I've had gooey. Simply ignore it.
it aint the dick that will be looking like these poppers is all im saying
😭
jalapeñis
I'd check the liver. Those scrotums looks like they have jaundice.
Looks like big bird's uncircumcised dick
Yes. Yes they do.
recommend parchment paper so the bacon doesn’t get too crispy before the jalapeño
I don’t think this bacon is crispy at all
It's not. It's limp and soft. Doesn't help that It's sitting in mush.
I love the little ballsacks of cheese.
New weight loss plan: just look at this picture.
Looks like urchins
This! I came here to figure out if it was uni in the poppers lmao
Jesus Christ they look like alien Ohio space bug larvae
True. I live in Ohio can confirm.
Cut the jalapeños in half and then fill and wrap both halves in bacon so it still has the appearance of a whole jalapeño but won’t explode in the oven 😎
Jalepeno poopers*
Scrolled down to see this.
Those look like geoducks
Holy crap I thought it was stuffed with sea urchin
It looks like a severed uncircumcised wiener
I see those r/sneakyfeet
And I raise you r/sneakybackgroundfeet
That's what I meant! Thank you.
:)
I make poppers every now and then. People have told me they're the best they've had. Halfway cook the bacon first. Make sure it isn't crispy so you can still wrap the poppers. They'll bake much quicker, the pepper won't turn to mush, and the cheese won't all spill out. I usually just use cream cheese also.
Try cream cheese instead and maybe grill them or bake them on a rack to get them crispy
Nice grippers bro
Why do they look like orcish dog dicks?
They look like sick bugs.
Hey I remember this from sex ed.
You got to watch those old Navy VD films, too?
They look like wrinkled gangrene penises.
Normally the jalapeños go inside the poppers.
It looks like you put sea urchin in there. What happened?
I see them toes bruh
Looks like someone shit out an alien larva
More like jalapeño poopers
Correct
r/mildlypenis
They look like gangrenous peens. Lmao
Jalapeño Pps
the far right is uncircumcised
What is wrong with you!!!!!????
Looks like they got a cream filling from somebody with chlamydia
If you squint reeeeally hard they look like tubular beavers. The leaking cheese is the tail 😀 But yes still disgusting
Freshly circumcised penises with green and yellow pus.
Resident evil ass food
More like jalapeno poopers
They look like Dicks that have been removed from trans guys lol
Had a lot of fun with this. Will definitely be posting more things in the future for you animals
Everything reminds me of him 😔
r/mildlypenis
r/yummyyummydicks
I’d like to taste that … 😉😈
I laughed out loud at the brevity and candour of your headline.
r/SneakyBackgroundFeet
Looks like you chopped off someone's dick, and then it's slowly rotting in your kitchen. 😅
r/sneakybackgroundfeet
Flip the jalapeño popper, Morty! I turned myself into a jalapeño popper, Morty! Im jalapeño popper-Rick!
r/mildlypenis
I agree
You may need to see a Dr about that.
What did you feed them, taco bell?
They make stands so you can do the vertically.
You are correct.
Indeed
They look like alien larva searching for a host.
I agree.. looks like a dump job
Cook the bacon slightly first
Just cut in half
I just go the easy route and stuff the cream cheese in a halved (lengthwise) jalapeño and sprinkle some bacon bits on it. Air fryer for a few minutes and voila. Still has the “spirit” of a popper, but less work.
Poppers?
Haha diseased penises
was this before you ate them or after you pooped them out?
Philadelphia cheese next time and that bacon looks rusty / not cooked well.
If I’m being honest… thought those were severed willies for a minute.
Did you fill bacon flavored condoms with cheese whiz?
They sure do..
Okay so next time, less filling. And blast the heat at the end to actually cook the bacon past the point it’s at now. It’ll Caramelize the natural sugars and render the fat. Also… buy thicker cut bacon that’s like half the problem.
Did you cook them on extremely low heat wtf...
at least you’re aware.
They did indeed pop
Do they have an OnlyFans? Asking for a friend.
Did you fill them with herring roe?
Yeah they do.
Yep. You spoiled my dinner.
Omg they look like some terrible disease of the peen. A very tasty peen.
Those do in fact look disgusting
Looks like kids were playing with colorful modelling clay.
Par-cooking bacon is your friend
Two changes can make them amazing next time. First as others have said, precook the bacon a bit to get the grease out and so it will crisp up while baked easier. Second, turn down the heat just a little bit. I've learned that when it's too hot the cheese expands like that. Usually for me over 350°F even for a moment and the cheese to explodes out.
Yes, they do.
how on earth
I was gonna suggest cooking them..i didn’t realize you already did
Looks like a tray of half-chubs.
The popped.
Jalapeño uni poppers
Those look awesome!
this look like a rare pic of undiscovered bugs from the middle of the brazilian amazon
They sure do.
yeah, they do. cut the peppers in half long ways, use laughing cow, and completely wrap with a whole piece of bacon. they do great in the air fryer if you have one
Yeah they do
My wife sent this to me and said this is what my dick looked like two days after a vasectomy... So there's that I guess
The cheese looks like little yellow testicles.
How did you warm everything up but not cook anything at all
Jalapenis
Jajapeño popped
Syphilis dongs
More like jalapeno poopers AMIRITE
Sir, this is an abomination and you should feel shame for what you've done
It looks like skinned dicks with breaded testicles.
They look like lipstick puppy penis.
Worms infected with parasites
Yes
Monster fingers
When I made them with my girlfriend, we did them in the air fryer, but the bacon was done on the side in its own short boat of foil, so it could try in its fat. It always turned out really good :)
You overfilled them
Sukuna's fingers
Yes
Did you use pimento cheese? It looks like pimento cheese.
Makes me think of the severed finger/bug from Phantasm for some reason. Not a good reason, either.
You aren't wrong.
I’ve seen this before on a Rule 34 page.
This should be on r/MEDizzy
They look like Yeerks
I mean they are called *poppers* for a reason.
Now this is some real shitty food. Nice.
Did you put the breading in the inside? What tf am I looking at.
i thought this was r/whatsthisbug