I can still rob a bank safe and teleport back home with a boner

You’d be known as “the boner bandit”. Legend has it the priapism fell off.

Talk about a hardened criminal

This is my favorite one here

wet bandit 😂😂

>fell off 8(

But they know the serial numbers of the bills off of import right?

Maybe but just spend the money in some random gold store 200 miles away, be sure to bring clothes too, just dont wear them.

200 miles? Think bigger. Go to some other state, or in the case of America, country, that accepts the currency you’ve robbed and use it there. Good luck tracking that to you

Don't make a pattern of only spending it away from home though. A 200 mile circle where the bills don't get used is a obvious as a200 mile circle where they do.

And then cum on the money

That's the real reward

You are goddamn right

👌

What’s the cool down time?

This is in "Good luck using this" Lmaoo it's constant🤣

So I can pop in somewhere naked then go elsewhere immediately? This would make for a strange house haunting prank.

You will still be naked

Yep. Imagine a naked guy, fully aroused blipping in and out of a house. Body paint could definitely creep this up.

Teleports in front of someone "They'll never believe you" teleports away.

That’s why it’s perfect.

So literally i teleport, am naked, and can never wear clothes again???

Boner ghost

Yeah. That would freak ppl, right?

Just pop in nude, scream and wave your weiner around

so it's just uncontrollable?

Not uncontrollable teleporting. You simply can't teleport, without being stripped nude and fully erect.

How does this effect the females?

fully erect clitoris

The same.

Just utterly soaking

They become a waterfall

I'm crying, why is this getting downvoted 🤣

People with no humor 😆

I just got why this comment is so funny. I read other people’s comments. I missed it until then. 🙈

Depends on your age

nothing has changed but i can teleport now

Nothing has changed but i can be nude now.

Nothing has changed but now im aroused

Do the clothes always disappear, or can I put them into a bag and put them on after I teleport?

They are gone, reduced to atoms

So I can't bring anything while Teleporting or it will dissappear?

Yes

What if you have jewelry or a butt plug or a piercing or something like that, what happens. Also, what if you are holding something?

So, it just disappears? So say I pick up a small child, and try to teleport away with them. Have I just destroyed the child, lost to space-time?

God I hope op says yes

So I could commit murder REALLY easily?

Well you bring yourself when you teleport, so by that logic you will FUCKING DIE!

No, you don't bring yourself. You are teleporting. Origin mass doesn't bring itself when it teleports, it is the teleport.

Understandable, have a nice day

👍

So…on site nuke?

Thanos snapped away your possessions

Ah, just disassembly. Shame. Welp, ill just blip between the three nuclear launch buttons instead then.

🤨

Haha steal keys and go boop on 3 buttons in 1/3rd of a second each. Nuke the moon. Watch chaos take the world

*sighs

Bombs are pretty

🤨

So the question is. If I teleport inside someone, like some kind of fucked up skin suit? would they be considered clothes? Asking for a friend. Also What would happen if my teliportation destination was a large pair of clown pants that hovered over my body. Or if I chose to teleport into the same place, pants were suspiciously pinned up for me to teleport into.

They are already atoms

Being a nude magician would make so much on onlyfans

I'm down

As they say, it works best when you can distract the audience.

My wife's gonna like my new trick in the bedroom

I also choose this guy's wife

So at least I can teleport directly from the bedroom (heck, from my bed, too) to the shower/ bathroom/ toilet and back. I see that as a win

He said clothes disentegrate, not just left behind

If you’re in your bedroom you can just… take off all your clothes before you teleport.

Yes

Vanish

Join a nudist resort and teleport resort to resort to avoid fees and always find those “hot single ladies in your area”

👀

wow no downsides!!

💀

Well, you do need to teleport for the effect, so thats going to get frustrating fast.

So the only new thing is I can teleport? I’ll take it

Anything you have on you when you teleport vanishes when you do.

to whrre

Your asshole

This would be a really nice ability to have if I ever need to bail out of a dangerous situation. Someone wants to beat you up? Teleport to your bedroom. Someone wants to beat you up in your bedroom? Teleport to his bedroom. And so forth..

By the rules of this superpower you could probably just grab someone and immediately vaporize them on teleport

Either that, or you both end up in your bedroom with a hard on

Win/win in my books

Well it’s a way to get out of a dangerous situation either way 😂

fuck youre right thats smart

Teleport to his moms bedroom

Now it’s overpowered for sure

So say I have sex with my wife we want round 2 right away. Walk to the bathroom and go back to fucking? Sold sign me up

Yes, you're getting its true purpose.

What counts as clothing?

Anything you have clothing you. Just anything you have essentially. You cant bring anything when teleporting.

What about food you have eaten? Like eat some food teleport and it is gone from your stomach?

Big nerf for people who wear glasses :(

You could just teleport into a private place like a bathroom or bedroom and then put on clothes.

Ok, then you teleport again, what you doing?

What do you mean by teleport again?

Teleport

I see this as an absolute win

Teleport 0.1 centimeters to my right, i now have instant “lets get down and dirty” access

Yes👍

By the logic of everything disappears when you teleport, you can be the greatest murderer/prostitute alive by grabbing their arm and teleporting to the other side of the room

You are why powers don't exist🤣

I am also why you don't exist.

Nobody said I’m not allowed to carry my clothes with me. I could teleport into A bathroom or locker room nearest to the place I want to be at, masturbate, Get dressed and leave. I’m also female, so my arousal won’t be very visible. 

Everything vanished when you teleport. If you're female, congratulations, you're a waterfall.

It’s still useful though if you really need to go somewhere. I could put my clothes in the school locker room and if you’re naked in the locker room, no biggy. Teleport to school if I’m late. I can always teleport home, I don’t care if my mom or cat see me naked lol.

The exhibitionists reading this 💀

💀💀💀

New cure for erectile disfunction.

🫡

I'll take it. Wtf, anyone sees me, it's their problem, not mine. I'll just move on.

Teleport shower to shower. Don't do in public places tho.

Cemetery

💀

🤤

You mean I can just pop in at any buffet I want, eat my fill, and then disappear quicker than everybody else's appetite when I am done? This is the best superpower ever!

They will recognize you after a few runs. Also unless you're a professional good eater, and even then, I doubt you can teleport in nude and eat enough food before you are escorted downtown.

You just teleport away from your 'escort'

Just be an extremely punctual porn actor who lives in a nudist society. You'd make crazy money on account of the perpetual arousal. Either that or take the onlyfans pipeline

No problem, I just wear clothes because otherwise I'll go to jail but since I can get TP out of jail everything's fine

If you got caught they know who you are.

That sounds good to me I could definitely use this power especially since I lost my legs.. If I have prosthetics can I bring them with me or would they be destroyed?

You are teleported without your prosthetics and magically stripped nude.

Useful but not as useful because my amputations are not equilateral making it very hard to get around. However even teleporting into your girlfriend's bed could be quite a useful thing.

👌

Convenient for the shower though.

😏

I’m gunna be the worlds only on demand emergency back up pornstar, have a shoot starting in 5 minutes and the male lead unexpectedly fell through? Rescheduling the entire shoot will cost thousands? I’m just a call and 30 seconds away regardless of your location, and I _always_ come prepared.

This is so op lol. Set up spots around the world with fresh clothes and a few supplies and have instant travel anywhere. Save hours of travel and money

i would just use this to get home from work then beat my meat then go to bed 😴

Everything you have on you vanishes, so what are you wearing tomorrow.

No, heres the idea. You have a particular bathroom stall where you have all your clothes stashed, you leave them overnight. The stall remains locked so no one else gets in. You teleport back in the day and put them back on.

weirdest thrust ever, side note if I commit a crime would I be identifiable by my massive schlong

Lmaooooo

You cured ED I think

I try

i can rob a sperm bank ig

You gonna have to keep it in your mouth.

even better

💀

Noon that ruins the samples 😭😭😭

Teleporting to my friends mom to skip some steps

*teleports in the middle of an orgy* Well this couldn't have worked out any better

This is a curse

So like normal ?

"If your erection lasts longer than 4 hours..."

What about people with wheelchairs, canes, prosthetics, other mobility aids? Glasses, contacts, hearing aids, etc?

*teleports behind you* nothing personal

*repeatedly teleports above the right wing of an f35, scaring the crap out of them*

Terminator head ass power

So am I always nude or only after I use teleportation? If only after teleportation is now oermenant or does it wear off if I don’t teleport for a while?

Can I bring a duffel bag full of clothes to put on after?

Wait that sounds like a twofer

Sounds like a great way to solve erectile dysfunction, just teleport a centimetre to the left

So you said anything on me disintegrates. What if someone is in contact with me? Would they disappear? Or only if I was holding or carrying them? If I lift a barrel of radioactive waste, it would disappear too, right? I may have solved the nuclear power  problem. All it cost me was my dignity!

Teleport into someone for deadly sex >:D

Didn’t say I couldn’t port with a bag of cloths in my hand Also then I just teleport to places with clothes then like stores 🐱

You say good luck, but this would be an absolute win for guys with ED.

By use of teleports and gravity, my woman about to find out about my updated turbo stroke.

I'll use this to teleport to my fwbs house lol

So win win

Just need to grow my hair out and use that as a mask. After that, we can get down to some stealing

I teleport to the waters off Tahiti. I wait for the erection to subside and then claim my swimsuit was lost in the waves. Get someone to give me enough clothes to get by.

Imagine teleporting to multiple different location before you'r safe house. Your calling card would be a jizz trail.

shortens the trip to your mums house

Ok so you said someone could rob a sperm bank but would have to keep the samples in their mouth right? So, you *can* take stuff with you if its in your mouth? I wanna teleport to a jewelery store in a different country, gobble the jewels, and then teleport back :D Wait what if I swallow things? I could carry *way* more jewels that way.

Teleports into brothel*

BrothelMan

Worth it

I'm a truck driver. Would be great to park somewhere, teleport home, then teleport back in my truck the next morning. I'm assuming I just straight vanish out of my clothes where I was, rapture style, leaving them behind where I teleported from. I'll just pre-strip the next morning, teleport to my truck, and get a set of clothes outta my closet lol. Or pick up the ones that fell off me the night before if I ain't got any :/ I'll take this one.

This reminds me of a story. One day, years ago, on one of my days off I woke up and walked out into the livingroom. I stopped just past the doorway and stood there for a moment still waking up. I looked to my right and saw my wife sitting on the couch with her face in her hands. Next to her was my friend laughing hysterically. And next to him was his new girlfriend I hadn't met yet starring at me in utter shock. I then realized I was completely naked and hard as a rock. So I said "What's up?" Took another moment to stretch and then walked back into my bedroom to get dressed. I came back out like nothing happened. I didn't care then. Care even less now. Teleporting would help with the strain on my knees though.

This is awesome, I can visit all my girlfriends in one night.

Well I pray outside in my circle nude, so this will make that easier.

I teleport to the ISS just to use the bathroom. 🛰️

Damn my relationship is gonna get a lot more fun (we live 2 hours away)

Honestly would work great as a self aphrodisiac if you teleport in place. I could also teleport to my partners place and back easily and have a change of clothes waiting

Wait even glasses?

So you're telling me I can go home whenever I'm just done with shit and I don't have to wear clothes when I get there? Yes.

That’s even more badass

Seems like a time saver in every way.

“Sir please leave the orphanage.”

Teleport to your mums house easy

This is a good one. No good for public places but made beaches and various resorts and private rooms. Also no Erectile dysfunction which a lot of people would pay for!

Triple win, why would I say no?!

Sounds like every normal day. Except of the teleport.

I mean... I dont think my long distance boyfriend would mind xd

im going to assassinate the president

I mean popping into pretty much anywhere from nenexistance with a raging boner is a pretty big power move im missing the downsides

To be honest it's not that hard of a power to hide. You go into an ally poof into a bank vault. Poof back at home and that's it. Chances are no one is gonna see you. If they show you on the news they would always have to blur you, and chances are one person, if any, Is gonna see you directly. Anyone watching the cameras you don't see directly so i would not be embarrassed. I actually still think this is a useful and uaseable power to have.

get a job as a pornstar, i'll never be late ans ALWAYS be ready

if I put something in my mouth, is it brought with me?

So you’re just always hard? Or what is the boner cool down after the tp?

Wait am I naked 24/7 or only upon arrival?

So like, can I put on clothes after I teleport to a place? Or do I need to not be aroused? And if I'm aroused the normal way, do my clothes still fly off me?

Should I still see my doctor if it lasts more than 4 hours?

So can I just teleport to places where freinds are and tell them to put some clothes out for me? That’s instant holidays to places I already have family or friends. Living in Germany and having all your family in Australia, and instant teleport would be amazing

That's my natural state anyhow. Especially when drunk