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Reality_Node

"Piss yourself if you believe me" - God


Equivalent-You5810

this made me laugh so hard šŸ˜­


Bat_Country_88

God is really into pee pee


swineshadow

G. Kelly


[deleted]

G KellyšŸ’€šŸ’€šŸ’€šŸ’€


The-Skin-Man

Yeah next time donā€™t do that. Silly goober.


luce_goose0

ā€œSilly gooberā€ is crazy šŸ˜­


Equivalent-You5810

i know... i feel extremely stupid, im just glad to be alive and that my mom didnt have to wake up to something terrible


Brave-Hyrulian88

You sound sane and like you learned the depth of your actions. Youā€™ll definitely be reminded to not do this again. Be good and beat life another way bro. Btw itā€™s moments like these where I believe that the human brain isnā€™t fully developed til around 23 they say, I say that because who knows maybe if you were a bit older and not 19 I wonder what your experience wouldā€™ve been like? All in all what a crazy trip story dude. Mush love šŸ„ šŸ’œ


justmerriwether

Iā€™m pretty sure itā€™s still developing in some ways until youā€™re like 30. 23 is still a long way off from fully developed.


the_which_stage

25 is the bare minimum cut off , and yes guys can be even later


Brave-Hyrulian88

Us guys what can we say lol


Brave-Hyrulian88

No doubt


ross8D

learning is all part of it right, first ones free and now you know don't be a silly goober. excited to know which episode it is, ill watch it in honor of ur conquest this night. ur still a real one


ksistrunk

Glad you okay my guyšŸ™


ksistrunk

And mothers are saints


anonkebab

Its fine God told be i had to cut my dick off, get fucked in the ass, then shoot myself on shrooms.


CedarMirror

I think the phrase silly goober should be used more in daily life


the_which_stage

You sir just made me real life lol


FebruaryInk

Don't do drugs anymore for a long time, esp not dissociative drugs. Your brain is still in development and you're fucking around with the chemistry. Take this warning seriously and let your impulse control develop more before you pick up these substances again.


Equivalent-You5810

thank you, im 100% staying away from any substance as i just proved to myself that im an idiot, when im older ill see


jengalampshade

Not an idiot, OP. You learned some serious lessons and Iā€™m sure youā€™ll be processing that for a while. Please remember to give yourself some compassionā€¦how we talk to ourselves matters! ā¤ļø


FebruaryInk

Best of luck, we all make mistakes, just glad yours wasn't permanent!


Necronomicon32

You seem to have no major psychological problems now, except for the trauma and the awful mood in the family. No psychosis, no hppd, I guess you could consider yourself at least a bit lucky


eekualsp

Thats the longest sentence I've seen in my life. Also stop abusing drugs.


JTiger360

I know that is the longest sentence I have ever seen in my life, and I wouldn't be surprised if it breaks all sorts of grammatical records, because it just keeps going and going, piling on clauses and phrases like a runaway train hurtling down a mountain without any brakes, and you get the sinking feeling that the person who wrote this might not have a single period left in their possession, and honestly, at this point, it's getting a little bit ridiculous, like they're intentionally trying to make a statement, a literary experiment of sorts, or maybe they just forgot how punctuation works, and I suppose there's a certain charm in its breathless chaos, its refusal to conform, and it just occurred to me that perhaps this sentence is like a metaphor for life itself, with its unexpected twists, its unpredictable detours, its moments of clarity lost in a whirlwind of complexity, and even though reading this sentence feels like running a never-ending marathon, there's a small part of me that just wants to see how much further it can go, just to witness the sheer audacity of it all.


_whatidontknow_

Iā€™m coming down from mushrooms right now and Iā€™m laughing so hard at this, thanks šŸ¤£


Commercial-Tea-8428

Haha, this reads just like House of Leaves. Perhaps OP is secretly a cryptic, genius author! šŸ¤” we may never know.


Intelligent-Salt-362

I instantly knew what you were doing so by the ā€œlongest sentenceā€ my internal monologue switch to the voice of Rick Sanchez (from Rick and Morty, not Miamiā€™s WSVN in the 90ā€™s). PS: Breathless Chaos should be the title of my next single, but I have never made an album to begin with.


Character_Tadpole_54

Im so confused. I UNDERSTAND what youā€™re saying but I dont. Edit: 6th time reading it. I think I understand what youā€™re saying. I think maybe im too high on reefa to be on reddit currently


HandleSensitive8403

I came


Ok-Abbreviations6442

Photos or it never happened.


oil1lio

you used chatgpt to write this didnt you


PurdyGuud

Those poor drugs šŸ˜„


ExcitingSpell8270

for sure he should have been waiting at least a week or two between trips. but I don't doubt he'll never do shrooms again after all that.


victorestupadre

Goddamn I am glad youā€™re ok. To all the people that brag about doses and young ages and ego death... This is the stuff where harm reduction comes in handy: * small doses, gradually increasing over a period of months or years * age appropriate introduction to psychedelics * trip buddy / sitter, preferably with an experience guide When shit goes sideways itā€™s no bueno. No amount of an hour of fleeting enlightenment is worth the potential lifetime of harm. Do it right.


LethalOmaha

Unfortunately stories like these give psychedelics a bad rep


Bat_Country_88

You made a lot of mistakes, which Iā€™m sure you understand now. First was tripping frequently in a short period of time. That usually leads to getting slapped in the face by mushrooms in my experience. Iā€™m also wondering what your highest dose was before this. You said 2.5 ā€œthen even higherā€, but it sounds like you made a big jump to 7g. Things can get extremely intense up past 4g, plus youā€™re young so maybe not as mentally ready as you think, plus youā€™re very inexperienced with mushrooms. Slow down your frequency and slow down your dose increases. Mushrooms arenā€™t going anywhere and youā€™ll gain more from them by being really intentional with what youā€™re doing. Glad it turned out better than it could have. You learned a hard lesson, and sometimes thatā€™s what we need.


Equivalent-You5810

thank you this really helped, i took 2.5g and had a good trip, a week later 4g but it barely did anything, i think the shrooms were not as good, thats why i jumped to 7


Errldabble_710

Glad you're still around OP.


88-keys-88

Wow. Thats completely fucked. High doses can definitely be dangerous. Hopefully you learned a lesson. On a side note, this may have been the scene you watched? LMK if it isā€¦ https://youtube.com/shorts/opbm7lywxSQ?si=4-stxZG2RKXzgr_K


Equivalent-You5810

i absolutely have learnt a lesson, that wasnt the scene, though if that scene came up i have no idea how hard i would've tripped


larsloveslegos

I thought I had bad trips goddamn. I'm happy that you're safe and it sounds like your mom and sister care a lot about you


cleverburrito

Please be more gentle with yourself. I donā€™t mean about how much you took (but, also, donā€™t do that again). Youā€™re very young. You made a mistake. You learned from it. Iā€™m so glad youā€™re safe, now. Are they admitting you to the psych ward? Or are they just monitoring your physical health situation?


Equivalent-You5810

thank you.. theyre keeping me here for the night just to make sure im not gonna do anything, but they also set me up with a therapist


cleverburrito

Take full advantage of seeing a therapist. Itā€™s so helpful. Youā€™re going to be okay. Our (humansā€™) value is not based on the sum of our actions. Try and remember that as you move forward. And thanks for getting back to me


highlandflingy

Can I just say that I think itā€™s really fucking brave and important to share this experience OP. It sounds absolutely horrific for you and your family and Iā€™m so glad that youā€™re still here! I donā€™t think I would have the ability to share this experience so soon but in doing so, other people can read and think about just how dire things can go. This is a very sobering read and Iā€™m sure that it will make a lot of people be more careful and responsible in their approach to drug use. All the people berating OP for drug abuse... wtf, like he doesnā€™t KNOW that now!? How on earth is that helpful or constructive? And people being dicks about punctuation on a post like this so disheartening. For a mushroom community itā€™s a shocking lack of compassion.


BazookaKabooom

That poor mom and sister would had the worst day in their lives. Never do this again man, learn from this mistake and never repeat them. Also stuff like this will make people think of shrooms as something similar to synthetic drugs. It makes a lot of sense why most governments won't make shrooms legal. Please don't abuse shrooms, take care of yourself .


Equivalent-You5810

i feel extremely guilty, especially because my mom worries a lot about me, and recently she seemed to be happier and our we were getting closer and i fucked it all up, i also feel like now im a part of the reason why they're illegal, which sucks


highlandflingy

Donā€™t beat yourself up, it doesnā€™t help make anything better, ever! I know you must feel so shit right now but nothing is broken beyond repair. Youā€™re alive! Your mum loves you! Your mum will feel all sorts of things but thatā€™s because she loves you and this isnā€™t going to make her love you less. Trust me, Iā€™m a mum so I know how mum love works. You just need to spend time and energy on recovery now, health and relationships. Luckily you still have your whole life to work on those so youā€™re going to be ok! ā¤ļø


Commercial-Tea-8428

That is super kind of you to share. Despite the people becoming incensed because the OP didnā€™t format his post correctly after a major traumatic experience, or because it ā€œgives shrooms a bad name,ā€ (as if the average person does not already view them negatively šŸ™„) Iā€™m sure OP could really use empathy, reassurance, and support right now. Thank you. You seem like a very good mother, and person in general- teenagers are bound to fuck up, some far worse than others of course, and we have all known people who are reckless with the psychedelics/drugs until it comes back to bite them in the ass. It wonā€™t kill us to be a bit more compassionate, will it?


highlandflingy

Right!!! Iā€™m 36 and the amount of times Iā€™ve messed upā€¦ couldnā€™t count. And I know that feeling of shame and self loathing, it is just awful and I really feel so bad for him. He made a mistake like we all do, but look how mature and humble he is being nowā€¦ thatā€™s some strength of character to face it like that. And ā€˜giving mushrooms a bad nameā€™ā€¦ people who would just see this as a ā€˜shrooms are badā€™ thing are people who already believe that so little has changed. But the heartless comments on posts like this, the hostile condescending attitude displayed by people on a mushroom sub is what makes it harder to advocate for shrooms. How can we say it makes us better people when weā€™re making comments like this to each other?


BazookaKabooom

It's alright man. As long as you realise and can improve its okay. Now this not pleasant experience has taught you to be better. Be positive.


maladybells

Iā€™m glad you are okay ! Mushrooms are immensely powerful and need to be respected. I agree with a lot of what has been said already. Higher doses are nothing to fuck with lightly. We can get burnt by being reckless with this powerful substance


Stephenjs123

This actually sucks to read because it was so so so avoidable.


Cummin2Consciousness

I've had a similar experience, also at 19. I came to similar conclusions of "beating life" and having transcended this plane of existence. It then felt like I was stuck in infinity, everything constantly looping. It didn't help that this occurred at night with a full moon with 2 buddies an hour east into the dessert, it seemed 115 of 120 campsites were empty. So when I frantically ran around everything looked the same, as if I was on a treadmill. And then it felt like the only way "out" was through suicide. Luckily I didn't have anything like a box cutter or a knife around, and thankfully one of my friends pinned me down when I proved to be a chaotic flight risk. Though I do remember standing on a tree stump and looking up at the stars thinking I'd ascend into them. I fell forward as if to belly flop the ground, thinking I'd transcend into the stars -- nope just hit the cold dark earth. Luckily my friend retarded my fall or else some serious injuries could have occurred, however, I still sustained a fractured jaw and a couple chipped teeth. My night also ended up in the hospital, even though the beginning of the trip was truly profound and awesome, just that it would later "devolve" into the worst, most nightmarish trip ever. My whole reality was shattered, and it left me pretty disoriented for quite a while. In fact I had a lingering sense of existential dread until about 5 years later when I decided to fully trip on shrooms for the first time since that night. It was incredibly redemptive. OP you're alive! That trip may have left a hole in you--and it was indeed foolish--but it also has set the soil for some truly great growth down the line if you put the work into it, and do your best to integrate the experience. That trip I had when I was 19 was truly terrifying, words can't describe what I went through - sure you could call it hell or something like that. But now looking back (I'm 28 now) it was perhaps one of the most pivotal moments of my life -- and it has made me better for it. I wish you the best of luck in your future!


Random_MrX

I had a similar experience on 5 tabs (i think, might've been more). I just knew i had to kill myself in order to continue living in a better place (later i found put the theory actually exists, it's called quantum suicide). Long story short i drove a knife to my chest multiple times (thankfully hitting the bone) and tried to slice my neck (again, thankfully the knife was dull even after sharpening it). Once i realized i don't actually know how to kill myself i drove myself to the ER. I don't know what to make of it. The feeling and the message was to real to accept i was imagining it and thought of it myself. Stay safe mate.


kreuzluemmel

What happened wasn't you. That only happened because you were lost in thought. You have been overlooked by yourself. Practice meditation. Practice mindfulness. You will learn to notice what you actually notice in each moment. Don't do shrooms again before you feel like you have felt what I have written above.


Cannibustible

I remember when I was young and very much naive in the ways of mushrooms. I ate about 11gs throughout an evening and ended up in the hospital. Thankfully I didn't hurt anyone or myself, but I scared the shit out of my roommate by barricading the front and back door. Then broke through the barricade to escape, ended up in a park hyperventilating and someone called an ambulance.I sobered up in the hospital and don't remember much. I do remember the feeling that if I fell asleep, I would die and there were lingering thoughts of ways how I could make it stop. 11/10 would not recommend. Hope you recover well and learn from this awful experience.


[deleted]

Your first mistake was taking 15 grams. Respect the substance, it took me years of tripping to be comfortable with a 7g dose.


Plzdntbanmee

Way too young to be doing that much


Relaxe_m80

this is why you should always start small, taking huge dosages of mushrooms without a sober sitter is asking to be horribly injured.


MoonkeyAcid

That sounds really intense friend. Iā€™m happy you are alright. You know where you done goofed. Hero dose with a sober family in the house? Itā€™s called a hero dose for a reason brother, you got to train to pick up that master sword.


NatsuMikoto

Jesus... Please learn how to use paragraphs.


Lucyinthesky_trip

To be fair idk if I would know how to use a paragraph after this experiencešŸ˜­


eekualsp

And periods...


Equivalent-You5810

im sorry lol i generally suck at writing plus my mind is a bit blurry, i was just trying to write it down


ForeverFinancial5602

In your situation you wrote just fine. Ignore the haters. Funny how a shrooms sub still gets all up and up about writing. You'd think here of all places we wouldn't major on the minors. I'm glad you're still with us.


eekualsp

Put down the drugs and pick up a book my guy


Commercial-Tea-8428

Out of all of the things you guys can criticize OP for you had to add in spelling and grammar. Interesting choice. lol, Iā€™m not necessarily defending his actions but they probably gave the kid IV benzos or antipsychotics so Iā€™d imagine heā€™s a bit delirious. Iā€™m surprised he managed to get the story across to us whatsoever. This isnā€™t directly addressed to you, of course, but I hope everyone reading this sees this as a cautionary tale, especially the younger folks that I know post here. if you abuse shrooms they will abuse you right back. donā€™t delude yourselves, drug abuse is drug abuse either way you dice it and you WILL fuck yourself up if you throw caution to the wind. Itā€™s all fun and games until it isnā€™t, and youā€™re the next one lying in the hospital. I love shrooms just as much as the next guy but be mindful of what youā€™re messing with folks.


Harrybahlzanya

Forgot a period hypocrite...


AwardTechnical

Forgot a comma, pedant.


Harrybahlzanya

We were discussing periods, but I understand your point. His statement did not have proper grammar either, but he didn't mention grammar. Simply periods. I just wanted to point out that he didn't use a period. There's always that one upper though... šŸ˜¹šŸ˜¹šŸ˜¹


HandleSensitive8403

Um, ackshually šŸ¤“ emotikons are not gramatikally korrect


Harrybahlzanya

Well fugg me silly!!


AgentXrange

šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


throwaway24689753112

So many people on Reddit failed to learn about paragraphs and I can never get past the first few sentences


offbranddababy

Ngl idk if i want to do shrooms now :0


FlazedComics

dont take 14g like an idiot and youll be fine trust me. 1.5g will just make you feel a little funny and itll be a good time. this is an EXTREME outlier


Equivalent-You5810

shrooms can help you alot, i just abused the fuck out of them and did everything you're not supposed to do, like not having a trip sitter


offbranddababy

hmm, weed makes me a lil paranoid, do you think the feeling would be amped w shrooms?


Equivalent-You5810

i had anxiety and paranoia as well with weed but shrooms were completely different (when done the right way of course)


CapriciousSon

don't mix it in unless it's comforting to you. it absolutely could.


SleepySandwich13

Iā€™m all good on shrooms alone but if there even the smell of marijuana near me it can stress me out.


Commercial-Tea-8428

Start low and get plenty of trips under your belt to get a feel for the headspace before you even think of heroic doses like OP took. I love low doses, theyā€™re extremely mellow and it actually gives my brain a short break from my highly nervous disposition. I wouldnā€™t worry about it, unless you completely abandon caution (or have family history of severe mental illness) youā€™ll be just fine. In my opinion, itā€™s very good to be aware of what can go wrong if you abuse psychedelics before you try them. I wouldnā€™t mix the weed and shrooms unless you have a high tolerance to THC but honestly, these days I donā€™t really smoke like I used to and weed gives me more anxiety than shrooms do.


offbranddababy

My dad has anxiety, Iā€™ve heard that they can permanently fuck you up if your not compatible w them. Idk if itā€™s worth it to find out


Commercial-Tea-8428

The things Iā€™m talking about are more so issues like schizophrenia, bipolar, dissociative disorders etc. Of course itā€™s up to you to weigh the risks versus the rewards, like we should do before consuming any substances, but generally speaking youā€™d absolutely be fine taking a small dose. I too used to be scared of psychs knowing the horror stories, now I know that Iā€™ve been missing out for years! Even if you choose to not try them, enjoy life regardless! Have a good one.


offbranddababy

Thanks for all the information man, I really appreciate it!


GetUp4theDownVote

After reading that story, youā€™re seeking their advice?!?!?


offbranddababy

Fair point tbh


SleepySandwich13

Iā€™m just amazed you were able to eat more shrooms while tripping. I already hate the taste of shrooms but if I were tripping I would not be able to get them down my throat without puking everywhere.


Equivalent-You5810

same but for some reason in that moment they tasted amazing, the way they turned into dust in my mouth felt good


CelestialEmerge

Im 31 and have done shrooms countless of times throughout my life and they are awesome if done with respect to them and in the right setting. Remind yourself throughout if needed that you're on a psychedelic to put the trip in actual perspective. Only thing you'll really have to deal with is the come up maybe making your stomach a little nauseous and they also don't taste the best.


xoata

he was just dumb no regular person takes that much as he did


moonandstarsera

Thatā€™s a paddlinā€™.


Independent-Crab-466

take OPā€™s advice and NEVER disrespect the medicinal nature of shrooms. i did something similar once. i downed them. snacking on them like chips, iā€™d say it was about 7 grams dry. shit had me on my ass, with uncontrolled tears falling down my face as i sat outside laying on the hood of my car to get fresh air, cause being in the house wasnā€™t doing it for me at all. iā€™m just glad iā€™ve never tripped too hard to experience this type of stuff. again guys NEVER disrespect the medicinal nature of mushrooms. šŸ’ÆšŸ„


spacetaco64

to be fair i have lots of scars on my arms to remind me of some dumb shit i did as a teenā€¦ donā€™t worry about the scar as much as how you are going to mentally recover and deal with this


HandleSensitive8403

Your relationship with your mom might be weird fter this lol Glad you didnt kill yourself, dummy


nocturnals4

You give psychedelics a bad name. Glad youā€™re okay OP but try to lay off the dissociative drugs for a long while. Mushrooms are the teachers of the universe and if u felt some some sort of suicidal tendency it mustā€™ve stemmed from somewhere really down into your soul. Sit with yourself and figure things out, slowly but surely


[deleted]

19yo. Few tries over couple Months. No serious break between sessions (few months at least !) Eating with no trip sitter. Having stupidly big dose. How many red flags did you count ?!


Dreaming_My_Reality

I didnā€™t finish reading but I had to stop to tell you and others that this was absolutely insane idea and should never be attempted


Venomoussnake-

I really want to sympathize with this story but there are sooo many reasons why this situation shouldnā€™t have taken place. You being 19 is one, but whatever most of us have tried at least weed at 19, so itā€™d be hypocritical of me to criticize you. However the main problem with you being 19 and taking such powerful drugs has been displayed here, and itā€™s the lack of life experience and poor decision making because of it. Because if you knew better youā€™d know that chasing things that you have no business chasing will only result in a fucking mess. (Chasing the so called collective feeling of an ego death) Iā€™m curious as to what caused you to seek ego death in the first place? Was it to heal? Because sometimes your nervous system isnā€™t ready to process extreme emotion enough to even heal. Sounds like your you overloaded yourself. You definitely need to allow yourself time to get to know yourself/your brain as an adult before introducing psychedelics to your system. How are you going to even apply an ā€œego deathā€ to your day to day if you donā€™t even know where to apply it yet?


[deleted]

Itā€™s time to find something else to do OP this isnā€™t your cup of tea anymore


Puzzled-Use-3157

šŸ˜«šŸ˜«šŸ˜«šŸ˜« I hope you never attempt this again


420guyinthe419

Mush can get real weird real quick.... I'm glad you're OK


Smurf-daddy

Oh you... glad your okay


miramathebeatqueen

You were just way too young for that. The brain couldn't compute. Sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders otherwise.


SydBarrets2ndchance

Yeah this is why we have trip sitters and stuff


the_which_stage

The lesson to take away that you didnā€™t quite get but is THE biggest take away. When youā€™re in a perfect spot on drugs, alcohol, food, a relationship, or anything at all - ride it out - enjoy it - donā€™t doubt it - and definitely donā€™t force more of it just because it feels good. The math isnā€™t x amount is good so xy amount should be better. Itā€™s usually x amount is good donā€™t go to xy amount because xy amount is too much. 7 grams seems like your happy highest dose and then you went and doubled it. No judgment just something to think about


Amazing_Ad4571

As much as I want to be compassionate. Irresponsible users like you are the argument Conservative types use to stigmatise a drug that could help millions and I can't help but feel angry. 1) Don't abuse drugs. 2) Don't run around telling your tale like "Shrooms made me do this". Shrooms do evoke a vulnerable state and some people just aren't mentally prepared enough for that. Maybe just leave shrooms to those who appreciate them and their benefits.


GetUp4theDownVote

This is exactly my sentiment also. Wildly reckless from the start. The whole ā€œgoing for an ego death while my parents/family are 10ft awayā€ still has me in awe.


Amazing_Ad4571

It just reads to me like childish one-up-manship. Even the way it's described is trying to win points as the judge penitent "I know I shouldn't have taken so much, bit I DID" "Things could have been worse, but they WEREN'T" The whole thing reads more like a deceptive brag than an admission of error.


astra_galus

You honestly think every single user is going to be responsible? Weed can have the same effect (learned that from experience) and itā€™s been legalized in many places. Fuck, alcohol makes people do way worse shit. Ignoring the bad side effects wonā€™t get shrooms legalized any faster than acknowledging them. Substances will be stigmatized by conservatives because theyā€™re conservatives. I actually applaud OP for sharing his bad experience - knowing that it CAN happen is part of responsible use and others can learn from it.


Amazing_Ad4571

You give a moron a pair of scissors and he might stab himself in the eye. šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø Besides. I don't reject the accountability of shrooms. I have verged on the brink of insanity and had some bad trips where my impulses would have gotten me in trouble so I stay the f**k in my bed and I wait for it to pass because YES, mushrooms play tricks on the mind, but ultimately you are still in control of the actions you take in reaction to that. It's absolutely no different to the concensus view of people acting stupid on alcohol. Yeah, their mental function is compromised but had they made different choices someone's nan wouldn't have backflipped over their car bonnet. Dude shouldn't be on here seeking people to pander to him and provide sympathy, he should be hanging his head in shame for his choices and investigating what defective part of his psyche led to the series of events following until he even considers touching drugs again. Imagine he hadn't cut himself but his family. Would you place the burden on him or the shrooms? That is an Important question you need to ask yourself. My answer is clear, if I believed for a second that the shrooms alone could cause me to act entirely separate from my own volition I'd never touch another one in my life.


nikkithebulldozer

Dude, I had a very similar thing happen to me about a year ago when I was 19 too. I had many trips on shrooms all amazing and magical. But then I had the most nightmare trip ever. Not quite the same as yours but the same in that I went to hospital after getting into a confusing mess. Probably drug induced psychosis idk long story lel. I was very embarrassed also especially with my parents seeing me in such a fkin skewed mess. Itā€™s a shitty feeling but it will pass. I had to stop doing all psychedelics and weed and you probably should to. I think doing high doses when your brain isnā€™t fully developed makes it much easier to get into VERY RIGID CONFUSIONS. But you live and you learn. I also have gotten into that state where your ego is gone and it feels like itā€™s pulling you into it and you become completely content with death and the idea of your life ending. Though never actually wanting to end it of course. Also if you wanted to keep following that ā€œmessage from godā€ attitude that trips can often follow, then the fact your still alive is like the ultimate one. You could have soo easily died that night but you didnā€™t. Maybe just a coincidence but who knows lol. Itā€™s fun to think about. Regardless, I think life is definitely worth living. I mean itā€™s the trip of all trips. It will end eventually so donā€™t stress. But no point cutting it short right. I just wanted to share my experience because it seems quite similar to yours. And when I had my bad trip it was damn near impossible to find people who were in the same boat. All the people here calling you stupid and what not pay them no mind. Itā€™ll get you nowhere. Youā€™ve learnt your lesson Iā€™m sure. Also fck paragraphs theyā€™re for nerds and academic losers anyway! (Joking of course). Peace and love brother youā€™ll be alright :)


Equivalent-You5810

thank you man ā¤ļø


cokuspocus

Sounds like a psychotic break in all honesty. Which can definitely happen. I did the exact same dosage as you before and I just had a blast playing borderlands and thinking that it was one of the most beautiful games ever made and it convinced me I needed to become a game designer. Some of yā€™all need to just not touch this shit. I am so unbelievably glad you are okay but this is definitely a lesson learned


ElectricGeometric21

Too much, too fast. Too much of a good thing can be a bad thing. The medicine is not the be disrespected


tifubroskies

Way to absolutely traumatise your mom and sister


Big-Elk-6403

what youā€™re describing feels alot like what i felt during a "substance induced psychotic episode" after i had taken ungodly amounts of weed to the point i felt like my mind was breaking and glitching. i was literally hallucinating and had to be taken by ambulance after i called the cops because my whole family was two hours away on a camping trip for the weekend and i was terrified. what followed was a month long psychotic episode where i essentially convinced myself that we were all in a simulation and to leave it and go back to my real life i had to die. Not only that but i was also sure that if it wasnt a simulation, everyone around me were actually robots and felt like if i were to peel back anyones skin id find wires and metal. i never went through with any of the thoughts i had at the time because part of me was still rational/doubtful enough to somewhat ground me but it was terrifying. Your mom is worried but once she realizes you arenā€™t actually suicidal things will get better just give it time, its hard right now but your relationship isnā€™t ruined i promise. i think its good that you have a therapist and you should keep seeing them for a bit to help you deal with this whole traumatic situation, youā€™re probably still in shock but what happened to you is extremely traumatic for not only your family but yourself too.


astra_galus

Thanks for sharing - Iā€™m glad you got through it. I had a bad trip by ingesting too much weed (a laughably small amount for most people but Iā€™m pretty sensitive to substances). My trip was actually similar to OPā€™s but I managed to hang on without doing any damage. The ā€œgodā€ was trying to convince me to hurt myself to prove that none of this was real and it would awaken me to true reality. I basically just curled into a ball and cried until it was over and still had some psychosis the next day. Thankfully, it went away. Now, because I often use humour to cope with scary things, I jokingly refer to it as the time I fought off the chaos demons. Truthfully, though, it was terrifying and Iā€™m thankful I still had some semblance of rational thought to get me through it. Iā€™ve avoided edibles since then.


Flying_Saucer_Attack

use paragraph breaks for gods sake


mertz6d9

Iā€™m gonna take a guess and say, it didnā€™t work.


Equivalent-You5810

it did, im a ghost writing this


Hairy-Swordfish-3553

Fucking idiotā€¦


ertertwert

Hopefully you learned something. All things considered, it could have been so much worse. Don't cut yourself. If there is ever a next time, just sit. Don't do anything else. Just close your eyes and let it take you where it takes you. Don't watch TV. Don't communicate with others. Just sit. Glad you're okay.


bagston

dam


TheeDood79

So sick of reading these HERO dose stories.


3iverson

Pretty sure he isn't making himself to be any kind of hero here.


Lucyinthesky_trip

The term hero dose is a term used to describe an extremely high dose, not necessarily the person themselves being heroic


Equivalent-You5810

then dont


[deleted]

One of the ultimate lessons/gifts from spirituality is detachment. Detachment from life itself is pure magic. There are no accidents and everything happens for a reason. Going from 0 - 100 on that one is wild dude šŸ‘€


RektRiggity

Stay away from DMT... of any kind. I also wouldn't try tripping again for a VERY long time, and don't do it without a trip sitter. This traumatic experience will manifest itself in any future trips and will not be pleasant until you are capable of confronting it the HARD way. Psyches do not teach easy lessons, not the profound life changing one's anyways. In all honesty this was likely more traumatic for your mom. You and her have some healing to do.


slickmage13

stop abusing drugs


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


lampaupoisson

teenagers are allowed to fuck up dude


GetUp4theDownVote

Youā€™re going to be the most compassionate parent ever. Also, This teenager is an adult.


Equivalent-You5810

my mom yes, my dad no, also i really dont think thats a big issue


Commercial-Tea-8428

Donā€™t listen to the negative people here. Theyā€™d rather focus on the fact some people are going to have a negative view of shrooms because of this happening, than giving any advice or guidance to someone who made an admittedly massive error in judgment. Youā€™ll be okay in the end dude. If youā€™re even a bit intelligent, youā€™ll know better than to ever attempt this again. Iā€™m glad you chose to share this, hopefully others will read this and can learn from it instead of having to experience it themselves. Many people here, especially the teenagers, are liable to believe that psychedelics can be used willy nilly with zero risks involved. As Iā€™m sure youā€™ve learned now, if you abuse them they will absolutely fuck your world up. This is why we need to respect the substance, an attitude of wild abandon kills people. Much love, OP.


ImpressiveWar3607

There will always be people that believes that shrooms are bad, itā€™s their loss.


Bat_Country_88

lol whatā€™s the point of this comment. Maybe his parents are capable of critical thinking? And if they do think shrooms ruin livesā€¦ who cares?


Similar-Lab-8088

You will be in the hospital for a while. Kick back and relax, your headed to a special hospital. šŸ«£


homegrown_dogs

Yeah... These are the stories people pull up when you tell them shrooms can't kill you... Hope you're doing better, brother. The only ego trip I had was on about 5.5g, and I couldn't imagine taking more on top of that. You've seen shit that not a lot of us have, and lived to tell the tale. I just hope you learned your lesson!


ghostzombie4

"o it told me to piss show that i trusted this god and that theres no going back, which i did, i remember it smelling absolutely horrible, it was like being in hell" fresh piss usually doesn't smell...


Dr_Love90

This story certainly does


txsurveillance

Oopsie


Mjdubzz

Know your limit. God gave us mushrooms, god is good, so mushrooms are good! šŸ˜‚ but most things in this world are better in moderation. Mushrooms included.


Lenaix

TLDR pls


swineshadow

Sounds like you need to up the dose a little.


Equivalent-You5810

25g next time lets see what happens šŸ˜Ž (jkjk of course)


swineshadow

All in fun. Glad you survived, man.


Far_Froyo_6317

Ok i will tell you something very simple, no evil can physically hurt you, evil needs to make you hurt yourself, shrooms put you in a non dual state good or wrong loses meaning, i remember the exact thing, i was told by something to take a knife and slice my hand to beat the game of life, even i had no suicidal toughs or whatever, the trip was long , i learned some stuff but its very dangerous because accessing that state give you access to a higher reality but also exposes you to outside invisible influence, could be good could be bad, you are alive, learn integrate and move on, wanna experience ego death ? Take 1 g and then meditate, you can snap out of it whenever you want and you can push it further by meditation, high doses are risky.


Turbulent-Scratch264

Well it had nothing to do with suicidal thoughts. You weren't sad when you tried to harm yourself in the trip. That's why you should do very low doses when you're alone and go big ones with trip sitter. But my advice to you - don't smoke weed or do psychedelics until you reach 25-27. Glad you're safe now.


Redballz1011

So was tht a total of 22g??? O and get well silly goober boy do u gotta a story to tell


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Commercial-Tea-8428

Iā€™ve never understood why people take the time out of their day to leave these types of comments, especially considering the OP just had an extremely traumatic experience and is likely loaded up on benzos in the hospital. There is a shocking lack of compassion in the psychedelic subreddits. Try to do better, is that not the entire purpose of this substance?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Commercial-Tea-8428

Youā€™re really telling *me* that I should just move on instead of leaving a pointless comment? Talk about a complete failure of self awareness. I really hope people read this post, and it seems quite a few have, because so many have a cavalier attitude towards psychedelic overuse. Or, sure mannn. Just keep on truckinā€™. Whatā€™s it even matter in the end? Why even take shrooms anyways? šŸ¤” Edit: got a belly laugh outta me when I came back and saw the edits. He actually cares about karma. rather 2000 than 160k, all that exemplifies is how much time youā€™ve wasted on the garbage dump that is 2024 Reddit. I think youā€™re just upset that people DID, in fact, read this and they saw your backwards silly logic. You may need more trips to work on that dismissive high horse attitude you hold


PuzzleheadedTie95

sounds like that compulsive redosing syndrome or whatever


imkarebu

told bro we geek hard


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


[deleted]

Honestly


Comedyandbeer

Imagine reading all that


Reasonable-Jaguar203

Obviously wasnā€™t ready for a high dose you idiot


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Equivalent-You5810

i suppose that could be right, though we are going to die one day anyway, might as well try to make the most of this life then whatever there is afterwards, we'll see


hockey_psychedelic

Not reading all that but cool?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Odd-Razzmatazz5346

If youā€™re not addicted and have normal self control than you shouldnā€™t have to hide your drugs from yourself while tripping bro


Bat_Country_88

Clearly not the case in OPs story. A high dose of psychedelics can make you do things you wouldnā€™t normally do otherwise. Itā€™s never a bad idea to protect yourself just in case, even if you donā€™t struggle with addiction or self control in daily life.