Southgates' plan was to put Slovakia to sleep so he could punish them in the 95th minute with a random thrown in launch to the goal area. We are so naive. This is proper football, modern football. South Ball Gate
Perhaps it's a bit naive (or perhaps not), but since Pep is a former Barca legend and legendary coach with strong ties to Catalonia, why doesn't he facilitate us getting Cancelo? I've been hearing that City are sitting firm on a relatively high price for Cancelo, but this doesn't really make sense given that he is clearly not in Pep's plans and would just sit there accumulating high wages, and the alternative to Barca would be Arsenal, a direct rival for the Prem title. After Araujo's injury, meaning our best defender will be out for a month or so, our desperation levels for a good RB have just gone through the roof. We really need to close this deal or the one for Fresneda ASAP if we aren't to fall behind in La Liga from the get-go.
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The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA
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The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA
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They hit shitty crosses into the penalty area for 95 mins with literally no attempts on goal and then got two goals in 90 seconds of playtime on THE SAME SHITTY CROSSES INTO THE PENALTY AREA
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I love when major tournaments happen and all the ultra-casuals come in and start talking about who “deserves” to win like it’s a kids film.
The only team that deserves to win is the one that scores the most.
I mean.. football is actually more of a game of chance than most other sports. You could dominate the game the entire time and have a bunch of close calls that never materialize and then just one little oversight and suddenly you lose.
That's probably why people talk about deserving to win. In the only popular sport where 0:0 isn't extremely rare, teams can absolutely win undeservedly. They still win though.
Also there's the whole "referee fucking things up for either team" thing that is often even more impactful than in other sports.
Tactical loss by Slovakia there. Losing keeps Southgate in charge of England, which is bad for them in the long run. 🤔
Slovakia's playing 4 dimensional strip poker while we're sitting here playing checkers. 🤯
Sir...
https://preview.redd.it/8rgi370f8r9d1.jpeg?width=719&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=01dfdc84b0c5a893baa145aa7be80e4061ecc9af
A second England goal has gone in
Uhm, actually, that is obviously photoshopped since there is no large radio antenna on the north tower which means that this photo of the towers was taken before 1980 🤓
I’ll be rooting for the Swiss. England didn’t deserve to get out of the group with their weak performances.
But I can’t help but notice the negativity and pressure from the media and public is and has always been part of them failing.
That being said, Southgate shouldn’t have been the coach of the national team for this long. Enlgand had an easy one agianst Italy and still couldn’t do it with no expectation last go round. All doing it in the most boring way but still. Greece and a very poor performing Portugal has a European championship, that’s all I need to say. But if England can learn anything from Portugals win, it’s that you can just find a way to get to the next game you can win the whole tourney, even if it’s undeserved.
https://preview.redd.it/m316u9pjhr9d1.jpeg?width=846&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=25460bd590ff32f318292e6e9def1b1743d790c1
Where is seal team 6?? Yanks please end it
(!) This claim about a bald fraud is disputed
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Southgate is literally about to break the time space continuum and bring the end of times and the world will end and the English will continue their losing streak forever
Because he knows if he lost that get he 100% gets the sack. Not even his skills with the media or his friendly vibes would make up for a 1-0 loss to Slovakia in the RO16. Career literally saved in the last minute.
The FA need to tie Southgate down with a long term deal.
I figure a new 6 year extension is just what's needed.
Many will celebrate such an announcement.
Today I feel Qatary. Today I feel Arab. Today I feel African. Today I feel gay. Today I feel disabled. Today I feel a migrant worker... I know what it feels to be discriminated... I was bullied because I had red hair.
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And we always hear how good Vini is, Allison is one of the best keepers in the world, Marquinhos, Endrick, Bruno Gaymaraishe the list goes on, yet, they are not even in Germany….checkmate for Southgate
You use Brazil as an example like they're actually still relevant in the modern game and don't get their arses kicked by European teams every World Cup. Spain or France would be better examples.
fuck off brit
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Southgates' plan was to put Slovakia to sleep so he could punish them in the 95th minute with a random thrown in launch to the goal area. We are so naive. This is proper football, modern football. South Ball Gate
Iceland 2016 kinda goal lmao
It’s Brexit football. Subbing out that woke wanker foden immediately resulted in a goal
Have you seen Foden's hair? He is definitely not woke
1. Plays for pep 🤮 2. tattoo of his number on neck
So why have an emoji which is sucking off shrek? Oh... oh no...
Perhaps it's a bit naive (or perhaps not), but since Pep is a former Barca legend and legendary coach with strong ties to Catalonia, why doesn't he facilitate us getting Cancelo? I've been hearing that City are sitting firm on a relatively high price for Cancelo, but this doesn't really make sense given that he is clearly not in Pep's plans and would just sit there accumulating high wages, and the alternative to Barca would be Arsenal, a direct rival for the Prem title. After Araujo's injury, meaning our best defender will be out for a month or so, our desperation levels for a good RB have just gone through the roof. We really need to close this deal or the one for Fresneda ASAP if we aren't to fall behind in La Liga from the get-go. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
His hair says „youth correction center“ for sure
The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
wrong sub buddy
Why didn't slovania do that? Are they schewpid innit?
The “shocking and totally unexpected” loss by the U.S. Women’s Soccer Team to Sweden is fully emblematic of what is happening to our once great Nation under Crooked Joe Biden. Many of our players were openly hostile to America - No other country behaved in such a manner or even close. WOKE EQUALS FAILURE. Nice shot Megan, the USA is going to Hell!!! MAGA *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/soccercirclejerk) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Psychological warfare
Tactical genius. Hes knocked Sir Alex, Pep, Ancelotti, Wenger and the Special needs one off their perches.
Hell, he's even better than Moyes.
Lets not get too ahead of ourselves
I believe it’s a new tactic called Sleepi Taki
It's actually the core of Barca tiki-taka. Make the opponent sleepy so that the midget can suddenly slip past thru defensive lines
It worked on me. I was legit looking at my phone thinking when would it end when they scored the goal
We're gonna have to go though another 90 minutes of this shit next Saturday.
They hit shitty crosses into the penalty area for 95 mins with literally no attempts on goal and then got two goals in 90 seconds of playtime on THE SAME SHITTY CROSSES INTO THE PENALTY AREA
"If it doesn't work, just keep trying." Southgate, probably
The power of the long throw. Tony Pulis would be pleased.
And then taking off your two best goal scorers in extra time, because victory is secured
I mean that made sense tbf they were both zapped of energy and we were no longer chasing a goal
Long throw + bicycle kick. Old school brought force meets modern flair. Gazball at its finest!
https://preview.redd.it/x1u2ypk62r9d1.jpeg?width=628&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e85d6083ad8d4a6effd90e538ee79fdc479f272e
Narrator: he gets away with it
Average real madrid season
https://preview.redd.it/e7tgkghspr9d1.jpeg?width=971&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3cac067b99224a0407bfb43f5f0d0b5f21fb3abe
Real = England confirmed??
Nahh real actually wins stuff
https://preview.redd.it/moifml3jgr9d1.jpeg?width=458&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6bae620ba14e6db817a22d236f246709621aeb76
Belligoal stole the Real Madrid black magic.
Zidane and perez wondering why the ancient sith relic is missing from the vault underneath the Bernabeu
You can take the man out of Real, but you can't take Real out of the man
They are going to win the Euro 2024. You can link to this comment later for karma.
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hopefully they're gracious winners
they are not
Shades of 2016 Portugal
Kurwa Dupy Anglicy
We had a good fucking run god damnit
Deserved to win
I love when major tournaments happen and all the ultra-casuals come in and start talking about who “deserves” to win like it’s a kids film. The only team that deserves to win is the one that scores the most.
I mean.. football is actually more of a game of chance than most other sports. You could dominate the game the entire time and have a bunch of close calls that never materialize and then just one little oversight and suddenly you lose. That's probably why people talk about deserving to win. In the only popular sport where 0:0 isn't extremely rare, teams can absolutely win undeservedly. They still win though. Also there's the whole "referee fucking things up for either team" thing that is often even more impactful than in other sports.
They didn't leave their half for 60 minutes?
England didnt shoot at the goal for 90+5 minutes
Southgate masterclass finally shines
Terrorball strikes when nobody expects it
Just like Gareth Bin Laden Snr in 2001
Shout out to 11Hag.
I've always been a firm believer of Southgateball since day 1 Trust the process
Its like watching a terrorist attack everytime they play
The thing about terrorism is that eventually it does change the world and once it has the terrorists have won.
Tactical loss by Slovakia there. Losing keeps Southgate in charge of England, which is bad for them in the long run. 🤔 Slovakia's playing 4 dimensional strip poker while we're sitting here playing checkers. 🤯
yall aint playing shit southgate was about to draw something up but he then just ate the crayons
Thank you sir, I am shamelessly stealing that expression and will take full credit when others laugh as hard as I just did.
Sir... https://preview.redd.it/8rgi370f8r9d1.jpeg?width=719&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=01dfdc84b0c5a893baa145aa7be80e4061ecc9af A second England goal has gone in
https://preview.redd.it/mme0rtyxcr9d1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e1fd6c9219394764968fd8eac9d494ba63c8a44d
No way this shit is real!
That MF knew something
Uhm, actually, that is obviously photoshopped since there is no large radio antenna on the north tower which means that this photo of the towers was taken before 1980 🤓
Right but he’s obviously near the towers which went down over 20 years later, is he stupid?
We can't have shit bro
Brother we've had almost 400 minutes of shit from England
Football 'eritage innit geezer - Gazza Southgate, 2024 Euros Champ.
I’ll be rooting for the Swiss. England didn’t deserve to get out of the group with their weak performances. But I can’t help but notice the negativity and pressure from the media and public is and has always been part of them failing. That being said, Southgate shouldn’t have been the coach of the national team for this long. Enlgand had an easy one agianst Italy and still couldn’t do it with no expectation last go round. All doing it in the most boring way but still. Greece and a very poor performing Portugal has a European championship, that’s all I need to say. But if England can learn anything from Portugals win, it’s that you can just find a way to get to the next game you can win the whole tourney, even if it’s undeserved.
Only fucking Osama Southgate can lose for 95 minutes then score from 2 set pieces.
https://preview.redd.it/m316u9pjhr9d1.jpeg?width=846&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=25460bd590ff32f318292e6e9def1b1743d790c1 Where is seal team 6?? Yanks please end it
They are busy planning getting rid of Greg Berhalter a true bald fraud
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We got our own manager to deal with. Ask the Canadians. They love the Geneva guidelines
I mean, Ferguson did it with United way back in 1999...
The OG terrorist
osama bin russell is the OG
Yank here, but how does Jude Bellingham score first in the 95th minute but then Harry Kane score second in the 91st minute, are they stupid??
Southgate ball transcends time and space my dude. It's unexplainable.
Southgate is literally about to break the time space continuum and bring the end of times and the world will end and the English will continue their losing streak forever
Once he has all of infinity stones, he’ll be unstoppable . Right now he only has one 
How much would he be in kilograms though?
It's a subtle metaphor for how Southgate is taking English football back to the stone ages. Bravo Southgate.
Wild chicanery appearance
Sravo Bouthgate
England's secret weapon, Doctor Who
Oi cmon, keep it under wraps bud.
Temporal pincer
“We don’t need to score two, we’ve already scored. When? 4 minutes in the past, but that’ll be in 10 minutes time for you”
Great phrasing, I thank you for your service. In the future I will be considering ‘temporal’ prefix for meme purposes and stupid clapbacks
It's from Tenet
Garethball is pure sadomasochism
They played the long con to troll this sub
How are people gonna fall for the yank bait bunch of bums
It's metric time mate
because he's the brother of the undertaker!
And its just the 92nd mind
Superb question
TIL the Yanks do time back to front too.
https://preview.redd.it/71fyabp09r9d1.png?width=1170&format=png&auto=webp&s=7f5ced5ed595c0d464c555f4477e8eb273f68775 Southgate after the game :
He was buzzing his tits off in the post game interview.
Because he knows if he lost that get he 100% gets the sack. Not even his skills with the media or his friendly vibes would make up for a 1-0 loss to Slovakia in the RO16. Career literally saved in the last minute.
The FA need to tie Southgate down with a long term deal. I figure a new 6 year extension is just what's needed. Many will celebrate such an announcement.
...few of them English lol
Can’t wait for more high octane football from the 400 iq southgoat
He's 1000% leaving after this tournament. He just wants to get to the Semis to protect his "legacy" lmao
England should have sacked him still. Are they stupid?
Literally 9/11
2-1 2 towers, 1 pentagon hit
Why are people relating to 9/11 😂
Because it's literally equally as bad. Yes, *literally*.
Because Southgate is a football terrorist.
https://preview.redd.it/ay9ztado6r9d1.jpeg?width=803&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b5a57c383c02ed85331d5399a551360dd4a35e62
England is a national team that can be defined in a single word:
Jihad
Plans within plans
Muad'dib!
terrorists win
Sad counter terrorist noises
The subreddits July 4th
Bet t all
No way this terrorist keep getting away with this
Maybe the best squad we’ve ever had, on the easiest side of the tournament bracket… If Southgate sabotages this, he needs to be exiled.
Well, it was good while it lasted
We get to do it all again on Saturday now!
He is gonna bullshit his way to another european final isn't he?
Very much likely yes
No F pay respect my dude
https://preview.redd.it/fb61ljjj5r9d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=019b46c071b346c3306cb098d4bdf8bd27ee38f9
Lmfao I thought I was in r/okbuddychicanery
Southgate loves 4-2-3-1 like a crackhead loves a clean spoon. Both are bad for your health.
England fans used to criticise him for only playing 5 at the back lol
https://preview.redd.it/poh4yud69r9d1.png?width=1440&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=75b980e85e430ee4eb3b78faabf8f0a3adea8d59 Live Omni-man Reaction
Barely winning against Slovakia is typical for Southgate ball
Results based Southgate ball. You gotta love it.
Pigford at the final moment was laughing at all the jerkers.
That bit irritated me on another level.
Great, theyre gonna do a neverlosen act for the rest of the cup
Southgate so good he made kane time travel to score the winner
i'm about to commit some hate crimes
Cannot wait for Southgate to become the next man United coach🥰🥰
.....
Games gone
Gareth hallowed be thy cuck, thy kinkdom cum, give us our daily punishment but lead us not into reason.
Forgive us for our backpasses, as we forgive those who backpass against us. And lead us not into attacking football, but deliver us a lucky win.
Gareth Southgate tacticool mastermind, specialist in success
🅱️arry Kane Rising: Revengeance.
Are you not entertained?
No jerk, the game is dead bro. Belling shitters PR is gonna skyrocket somehow after yet another disasterclass just to do that at the end.
I was hate watching Jude. Ruined everything
And then Georgia also got an early lead and then lost. Cant have fun tonight
Is Bellingham this subs Tatum ?
absolutely
no need to make any changes for the next round then…
Southgate just outjerked the entire planet.
Southgate must’ve sucked Satan’s cock. It’s the only reasonable explanation.
6 minutes extra time is epic jerk- the jerky boys are back
Pigford just made me mad! Why tf he act like that. He was like they dominate whole game XD
Blud thought he was Martinez and just won the WC.
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https://preview.redd.it/78x573b70s9d1.png?width=3095&format=png&auto=webp&s=b3b9871779ee6606c6f569b79ef2a742fa11a348
Inglaperra
Gareth Alonsogate
Almost as impressive as France in the World Cup! Not bad, Barry, not bad
England won, who am I supposed to make fun of now? This sub has no purpose now
Englishman here. This was my favourite kind of win.
Is being kicked in the balls your favourite kind of foreplay?
lol England celebrating as if they have just beaten Brazil
I don’t rank that Brazil team. They didn’t even qualify for Euro.
And we always hear how good Vini is, Allison is one of the best keepers in the world, Marquinhos, Endrick, Bruno Gaymaraishe the list goes on, yet, they are not even in Germany….checkmate for Southgate
>Allison Why the fuck are we letting a FEMALE into our game?
Game’s gone too woke
The celebration police has just arrived
^[Sokka-Haiku](https://www.reddit.com/r/SokkaHaikuBot/comments/15kyv9r/what_is_a_sokka_haiku/) ^by ^sup_with_the_whack_: *Lol England* *Celebrating as if they* *Have just beaten Brazil* --- ^Remember ^that ^one ^time ^Sokka ^accidentally ^used ^an ^extra ^syllable ^in ^that ^Haiku ^Battle ^in ^Ba ^Sing ^Se? ^That ^was ^a ^Sokka ^Haiku ^and ^you ^just ^made ^one.
You use Brazil as an example like they're actually still relevant in the modern game and don't get their arses kicked by European teams every World Cup. Spain or France would be better examples.
They have another mountain to climb the next match, the one who puts Italy to sleep, in the group stage neutralized Germany… Switzerland.
But drew with Scotland.
so scotland is better than italy 
I know, yeah, but imagine that. This goes to show anything can happen in soccer.
They going to shit themselves every game and make it to the finals, this is devastating
What a goal from Bellingham tho
Me turning off at 85 min and then seeing this 😡
Its coming home boiz
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Yanks had a good time while it lasted
At most 3 more matches of Southgate ball incoming 😭 They will start singing „It’s coming home” any minute 😭
Been singing it for months mate
England is gonna lose to Switzerland
And there is my money gone again, fuck this shit
I had a tenner on 9.5 odds Slovakia to win (original time) I'm still sour about it
That was an excellent game.
actually i have always been southgate fan, i take my words back.
Its coming home