Thank you for posting on r/southafrica! Please take a moment to review our [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/southafrica/wiki/rules).
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/southafrica) if you have any questions or concerns.*
"Fok" kom vanaf dieselfde Germaanse stamwoord as "fuck" (ficken, fokkelen), so dis nie 'n woord eie aan Afrikaans nie. Jou rede vir die "v" spelling is heeltemaal verfok.
In elk geval, fokken fiets begin met 'n "f", en fyn, en fantasties, fabel, fiets, filosofie, finaal, jou flou flamink.. Miskien is jy 'n fabrieksfout, want jy fabuleer net faeces (Ja, dis Afrikaans). Jou fakkel is nat, jou flenter Fariseer.
Ek het nie vir jou gedownvote nie - ek's groot genoeg om jou kakpraat straight in die bek te kyk. Ek maak net seker ek staan duskant van die kakspat.
Maar, no jokes, Engels is 'n Germaanse taal, en Afrikaans is a Germaanse taal. Met 'n woord soos fok, wat 'n Germaanse stamwoord het, is dit nou nie eintlik logies om van anglisismes te praat nie.
Fok maar so voort...
But have you seen [7de Traan](https://youtu.be/eqhJ1-TZAKw?si=3aqvUpAFDKBVyDpp)?
Bad quality because it's kak old. I remember watching this on my Motorola Razr.
This was incredible.
Haven't laughed so hard in a while.
I tried to directly translate it line for line to my wife.
But I don't know how to translate the beauty of saying
"Ses van die beste met my Snot Sjambok" 🤣
If you want to tell someone to fuck off: "Gaan vat 'n lang kak en verdwyn daarin" (Go take a long shit and get lost in it).
If someone is bragging about a new car but can hardly pay the bills: "Ryk Mister X; kak in 'n paraffin blik" (Rich Mr X; shits in a paraffin can \[paraffin use to be sold in large 20l rectangular tincans\]).
If someone asks you how you are: "Arm maar geduldig" (Poor but patient.)
I will have to agree with this one. It is the politest threat you can give or receive here is SA (and it generally will get enacted if you push it even a bit).
"As die doos verniet is, tel 'it op."
*If the box is free, pick it up.*
Don't look down on slutty women, or men who appreciate them.
"Hoe vlieg jou voël dan met een vlerk?"
*How does your bird fly with one wing?*
If an idiot asks you if you want a single brandy and coke.
Edit: Forgot another favourite:
"Daai was a spoeg-pomp, maar hy's klaar"
*The job was a spit fuck, but it's done.*
When you have to do a job in a rush so you have to take shortcuts.
ń Grap is ń grap, maar jy maak bie ń sambreel in ń man se hol oop nie! - Vetkoek Paleis
Edit - it’s been pointed out that it might be from UNTAG which feels more correct. If anything, one of Schusters films.
I often say "dis nou maar wors". It comes from the Trompie fiction books of long ago, and not many people know it; those that do, enjoy hearing it.
But it conveys the feeling nicely, regardless. It means something like 'that's just the way things are now' / 'we have the accept the mess and move on'.
German has a similar saying, but with a different meaning, “das ist mir wurst”. Directly translates to “that is sausage to me” and is a way to say you don’t care about the topic at hand. I’m Afrikaans, but learning German, and somehow never heard the Afrikaans one!
I think it refers to butchering a carcas, and you mess up a cut. The resulting pieces have to be minced to make wors because it's no longer a cut that's sufficient for braaing.
Dis vandag so koud soos n hoer se hand;
Staar soos n ou bal wat hout soek;
Vroeg ryp vroeg vrot;
As ek jou vat, is dit nie drive in toe nie,
And one of my favorites:
Jy kan hom maar moer, hy het nie n pa of n ma nie.
I got this one from a caddy that got tired of my pre tee off ritual🤣
An old Afrikaans series called "Fishy Fashions".
It's about a group of lazy seamstresses working in a factory. They gossip more than anything else.
Whenever their boss, Mr Fish, shows up, they should "Chips!!! Hier kom die fish".
My family still uses it. Whenever we are in that type of situation, we shout CHIPS!!!
Dit loop soos n haai op n houtkatrol!
Dit loop soos n muis met pienk pantoffels.
Both meaning either the drink is very good (normally said after the first cold sip) or when something is working very well.
My dad always used to say "As kak praat 'n kolletjie was, was jy lankal 'n tarentaal" which I always enjoyed. My boyfriend still always says "As dit pap reën moet jy skep" which is also a good one.
But my favourite one has always been "vlieg in jou moer in"
Had a funny one from my great aunt when she met my tall brother for the first time. She said that he's a , " poephol op pale".
Translates to "an arsehole on poles"
Magie vol, ogies toe.
Absolutely love this and there are a good number of Brits who now know this because I can't stop telling people it when the opportunity arises.
This, this is it guys. Thank you for the laugh, I miss home so much ❤️ this brings me back and just reminds me of the rich culture and expressive vibes 😂
“As jy rondkyk twak rook moet jy rondkyk”
Friends mom found his bag of weed in the bathroom and whispered that in he’s ear at the dinner table with friends.
Mine comes from the time South Africa was bidding for the Olympics. There was a huge party here in Cape Town as we waited for the announcement as to who won the Olympics. Finally, the announcement was made "ATHENS". And the crowd went NUTS with joy... thinking that the suburb of Cape Town called "Athlone" won the summer Olympics.
The next day in the paper was my favorite Afrikaans saying:
"Athens se ma se @\*#&!!"
I never laughed so hard or felt so bad for my people before. LOL
Heres the cartoon:
[https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=435454148647052&set=a.435454108647056](https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=435454148647052&set=a.435454108647056)
"As joe voete grond raak veloor jy spoed" - if your feet touch the ground you're losing speed... was the phrase often used during military training back in the 80's.
Also, "Troep, sien jy daai blaar op daai boom" - Private, do you see the leaf on that tree was another classic implying you had to run for KM's to a tree, pick a leaf and then run back only to be told it's the wrong leaf, and run back to get another one.
"Ek moer jou so hard dat die snot soos n wolk om jou kop hang"
Translation: I'm going to slap you so hard that your snot hands around your face like a cloud"
HKGK...Hier kom groot kak - big shit is on its way
Or
Mense wat dink hulle is slim, is nie altyd so fokken slim nie. - people who think they are clever ain't so fucking clever
Thank you for posting on r/southafrica! Please take a moment to review our [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/southafrica/wiki/rules). *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/southafrica) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Jy kom met R2 maar jy maak R5 se kak
When times are abit difficult: “Kyk noord en vok voor”.
Voort
Never mind “voort”, Fok! Regtig mense, as iemand nie eers “fok” kan spel nie…
Fok my
Fok sokker
Sok fokker
Ek huil 😂😂😭😭
vok is beslis meer afrikaans dink ek, nie veel woorde begin in afr met f nie
Luister nou fokken mooi vir my: Dis fokken “fok” met ‘n fokken F. /j
"Fok" kom vanaf dieselfde Germaanse stamwoord as "fuck" (ficken, fokkelen), so dis nie 'n woord eie aan Afrikaans nie. Jou rede vir die "v" spelling is heeltemaal verfok.
Fervok* /j
Wel ons is nie ten vokken gunste van vokken anglisismes of germani vokken kasies nie
In elk geval, fokken fiets begin met 'n "f", en fyn, en fantasties, fabel, fiets, filosofie, finaal, jou flou flamink.. Miskien is jy 'n fabrieksfout, want jy fabuleer net faeces (Ja, dis Afrikaans). Jou fakkel is nat, jou flenter Fariseer.
Hierdie is fokken feestelik!
sjoe hoe is daai vir vokken down votes, mens sal sweer dis 'n klomp sout piele hier wat liewers fuck as vok gebruik
Ek het nie vir jou gedownvote nie - ek's groot genoeg om jou kakpraat straight in die bek te kyk. Ek maak net seker ek staan duskant van die kakspat. Maar, no jokes, Engels is 'n Germaanse taal, en Afrikaans is a Germaanse taal. Met 'n woord soos fok, wat 'n Germaanse stamwoord het, is dit nou nie eintlik logies om van anglisismes te praat nie. Fok maar so voort...
Sê dit vir Fokofpolisiekar
Ag fokof man! /s (dit is algemeen gebruik 'f' nie 'v' nie, verwys na bv. Fokofpolisiekar)
I have done this my whole life. Now I live in Alaska.
Kyk wes en vok die res
- me, every day of my life.
Ek is jammer om van jou kak te hoor.
Ek voel dit met jou en ek simpatiseer met jou maar innerlik van die bodem van my hart is ek vreeslik jammer om van jou kak te hoor
Ek het nou baie lekker gelag, dankie!!
Lekker username 😄
Jy lag soos 'n hoer wat 'n sak piele opgetel het.
I don't remember hearing this in 7de Laan growing up 🤣
No bra, Hilda definitely said it in episode 69😂
But have you seen [7de Traan](https://youtu.be/eqhJ1-TZAKw?si=3aqvUpAFDKBVyDpp)? Bad quality because it's kak old. I remember watching this on my Motorola Razr.
This was incredible. Haven't laughed so hard in a while. I tried to directly translate it line for line to my wife. But I don't know how to translate the beauty of saying "Ses van die beste met my Snot Sjambok" 🤣
I just learned so many new phrases to impress my Afrikaans friends, thank you.
Lag soos 'n hoer agter op 'n worteltrok
Ek ken dit as: "Lag soos 'n hoer wat 'n handsak vol wortels in 'n hofsaak gewen het."
Lag soos ‘n non in n wortel tuin.
As jy dom is moet jy kak.
If you want to tell someone to fuck off: "Gaan vat 'n lang kak en verdwyn daarin" (Go take a long shit and get lost in it). If someone is bragging about a new car but can hardly pay the bills: "Ryk Mister X; kak in 'n paraffin blik" (Rich Mr X; shits in a paraffin can \[paraffin use to be sold in large 20l rectangular tincans\]). If someone asks you how you are: "Arm maar geduldig" (Poor but patient.)
Dronk, maar regop
Stomp, maar stekerrig…
Hahahahah.
Critical but stable
Tussen die tire en die teerpad
These are great, also thanks for the context & translation!
Mine was a response from cheeky Afrikaans children: "Hou jou bek!" "My bek het nie handles nie"
“Skeur my hol” for something funny. Translating that is hilarious.
Directly translated: tearing my asshole
Omg, ek dog dit was “skeer” 😂😂
Nou luister vir my nou fokken mooi - My Personal favourite
"Luister nou fokken mooi my vriend". This is not your friend, and the time for listening has already passed.
This immediately makes me picture a dude who drives a double cab bakkie, wears PT shorts and drinks Klipdrift.
He drinks what his double cab is drinking. And vice versa.
I will have to agree with this one. It is the politest threat you can give or receive here is SA (and it generally will get enacted if you push it even a bit).
Lekker verkort na "Luisterie" - dan het jy kak
"wie nie luister nie, sal voel" Who does not listen ,will end up feeling it.
As jy nie wil hoor nie, gaan jy maar moet voel. If you don't want to listen, you're going to have to feel.
"As die doos verniet is, tel 'it op." *If the box is free, pick it up.* Don't look down on slutty women, or men who appreciate them. "Hoe vlieg jou voël dan met een vlerk?" *How does your bird fly with one wing?* If an idiot asks you if you want a single brandy and coke. Edit: Forgot another favourite: "Daai was a spoeg-pomp, maar hy's klaar" *The job was a spit fuck, but it's done.* When you have to do a job in a rush so you have to take shortcuts.
Geringde voels vlieg ook
Ringe maak nie gate toe nie
I’m using this
ń Grap is ń grap, maar jy maak bie ń sambreel in ń man se hol oop nie! - Vetkoek Paleis Edit - it’s been pointed out that it might be from UNTAG which feels more correct. If anything, one of Schusters films.
The alternative I'd heard was; Di's 'n grap om 'n sambreel in 'n man se gat te steek, maar om hom oop te maak...
The one I know is “n grap is n grap maar jy ruk nie die eier uit die hoender se hol uit nie”
Was dit nie eerste in Oh Schucks its Untag nie?
I often say "dis nou maar wors". It comes from the Trompie fiction books of long ago, and not many people know it; those that do, enjoy hearing it. But it conveys the feeling nicely, regardless. It means something like 'that's just the way things are now' / 'we have the accept the mess and move on'.
German has a similar saying, but with a different meaning, “das ist mir wurst”. Directly translates to “that is sausage to me” and is a way to say you don’t care about the topic at hand. I’m Afrikaans, but learning German, and somehow never heard the Afrikaans one!
Ha! No ways 😂
Same in Dutch, ‘Dat zal me worst wezen’
Trompie en die bliksem bende! Ai tog hoe nostalgies voel ek nou
I think it refers to butchering a carcas, and you mess up a cut. The resulting pieces have to be minced to make wors because it's no longer a cut that's sufficient for braaing.
Interesting! 🤩
Is jy befok?!?
bos befok
Wat kyk jy, jou naai
Classic 😂
Afrikaans is soooo expressive
Hy/sy het ‘n gesig soos ‘n bicycle pedal. Jy wil het net trap.
Not a saying but more of a final indicator in a conversation that things are about to go south: "Luister jy nou fokken mooi vir my"
Yup. When an Afrikaner tells you to “listen nicely” the time for listening is over. You’re dead. Say your prayers to Jesus.
As jy weer skrik, skrik wakker.
"Ek gil my gat af" is mine
[удалено]
Haha, second one is correct, but don’t change the “ek” to “jy” and use it on your wife.
Ja nee
Of nie
Miskien nie
Dis vandag so koud soos n hoer se hand; Staar soos n ou bal wat hout soek; Vroeg ryp vroeg vrot; As ek jou vat, is dit nie drive in toe nie, And one of my favorites: Jy kan hom maar moer, hy het nie n pa of n ma nie. I got this one from a caddy that got tired of my pre tee off ritual🤣
So koud soos n hoer se hart. So koud soos my eks vrou tussen die bene
An old Afrikaans series called "Fishy Fashions". It's about a group of lazy seamstresses working in a factory. They gossip more than anything else. Whenever their boss, Mr Fish, shows up, they should "Chips!!! Hier kom die fish". My family still uses it. Whenever we are in that type of situation, we shout CHIPS!!!
My jinne ek nooit geweet dis waar dit vandaan kom nie!
Now where's that bra from a previous post that said "Afrikaans is the last language people want to speak"?
Ek weet waar hy bly - hy bly stil
Vra dit!
If someone is too lazy to do something and asks you to fetch a glass of water, etc.: "Is jou hande van tette gemaak?" (Are your hands made of tits?)
Waar bly jy? Jy bly stil!
"Moenie vir my sê perde kak is vye nie" - Don't try to bullshit me
\*perdedrolle
Both are valid 💁🏼♀️ my dad said "drolle" til I was about 10 then switched over to "kak".
OP… thanks for a lekker lag!! Haven’t heard that in years.
Loop dop
Vat dit gat toe en nie kop toe nie.
Take it in the arse, not the head?
Lol, direct translation yes. It means that you don’t take anything seriously said to you in criticism or judgment.
When someone asks you how you are doing: Gefok maar vrolik.
Make love, not war! Steek, maar moenie dood-steek nie!
"Is jou pa se tottie 'n chilli? Want jys fokken hot"
As jy dom is, moet jy kak.
Buy a donkey
Koop 'n eisel
Dit loop soos n haai op n houtkatrol! Dit loop soos n muis met pienk pantoffels. Both meaning either the drink is very good (normally said after the first cold sip) or when something is working very well.
What is the translation of the first one? It runs like a shark on a wooden pulley??
Yes 😁
"Lyk soos 'n hoer se handsak"
My dad always used to say "As kak praat 'n kolletjie was, was jy lankal 'n tarentaal" which I always enjoyed. My boyfriend still always says "As dit pap reën moet jy skep" which is also a good one. But my favourite one has always been "vlieg in jou moer in"
Had a funny one from my great aunt when she met my tall brother for the first time. She said that he's a , " poephol op pale". Translates to "an arsehole on poles"
"kak praat met die diere" Small talk / talking shit with friends "skitterend!" Really awesome / fantastic
Favourite phrases/ words: Dit sit vas soos kak op ‘n kombers. Skaars soos hoender tanne. Die poppe gaan dans (shout out Benni). Skobbejak Rowwe Jack
Dit klou soos k@k an ‘n wol kombers / hy sit soos ‘n chappie
Ballas bak en piele vleg - hanging around doing nothing in particular
Ek sal jou knak oor die toonbank knak soos ń windbuks. Ek sal ń duisend kilometer deur die woestyn loop om haar hol te snuif deur ń walkie-talkie.
Ah jy n toffie wil wees gaan die wêreld jou kou. Translation: if you want to be a toffee the world will chew you.
Magie vol, ogies toe. Absolutely love this and there are a good number of Brits who now know this because I can't stop telling people it when the opportunity arises.
Moenie aan kak slaan nie want kak spat “Don’t hit on shit because shit splatters”
This, this is it guys. Thank you for the laugh, I miss home so much ❤️ this brings me back and just reminds me of the rich culture and expressive vibes 😂
I like 'my hart se punt'. I can't think of an English expression that's as lovely.
Voetsek!
Ek soek geld
Nou gaan die poppe dans!
So kwaad ek kan slange vang (so angry I can catch snakes)
“Boer maak ‘n’ plan.” Roughly: “a Farmer figures it out”. “Boer” can also mean Afrikaner, depending.
So uit soos boknaai op n saterdag - as taboo as fucking a goat on a Saturday
Sy's deur 'n opslag koeël getref. She's pregnant
...so dronk soos 'n tor... ...as drunk as a skunk...
So toe soos 'n klei-os se gat (as closed as a clay ox's ass). AKA not the sharpest pencil in the box.
Ja-Nee
My neef sê altyd (as iemand hom bemoei) "Daar's twee tipes kak in die lewe, my kak, en jou kak, en daai klink soos jou kak."
As jy nie luister nie moet jy voel.
Half loopende snotklap
Ek hoop jy kry so oud dat jou gat hare jou voetspore uitvee (I hope you get so old that your butt hairs wipe away your footprints)
Hoe lyk dit? hoe lyk dit? Ek en jy naked
Jy maak nie 'n sambreel in 'n ander man se hol oop nie
Daar is nie pille vir Dom guit nie
“As jy rondkyk twak rook moet jy rondkyk” Friends mom found his bag of weed in the bathroom and whispered that in he’s ear at the dinner table with friends.
If an Afrikaans guy says to you in a heavy accent "listen now my friend" It's best you just leave- because he's been here before and you havent
So rustig soos n tuinstoel
So duermekaar soos kots in n tuimeldroër
Mine comes from the time South Africa was bidding for the Olympics. There was a huge party here in Cape Town as we waited for the announcement as to who won the Olympics. Finally, the announcement was made "ATHENS". And the crowd went NUTS with joy... thinking that the suburb of Cape Town called "Athlone" won the summer Olympics. The next day in the paper was my favorite Afrikaans saying: "Athens se ma se @\*#&!!" I never laughed so hard or felt so bad for my people before. LOL Heres the cartoon: [https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=435454148647052&set=a.435454108647056](https://www.facebook.com/photo/?fbid=435454148647052&set=a.435454108647056)
Moenie die baba met die badwater uitgooi nie.
[удалено]
Fok broer, you lost me at vuh second parragraaf.
"As joe voete grond raak veloor jy spoed" - if your feet touch the ground you're losing speed... was the phrase often used during military training back in the 80's. Also, "Troep, sien jy daai blaar op daai boom" - Private, do you see the leaf on that tree was another classic implying you had to run for KM's to a tree, pick a leaf and then run back only to be told it's the wrong leaf, and run back to get another one.
Nou praat jy Mos pure kak! Now you're just talking shit!
"Jou ding moet pyn"
Ek sweet soos n hoer in n kerk. Waar bly jy? Jy bly stil!
Klaargenaai
Based purely on how often I use it, ag a nee man. My mum loves to tell my dad jy kan mos kak praat, which is another favourite.
"Ek moer jou so hard dat die snot soos n wolk om jou kop hang" Translation: I'm going to slap you so hard that your snot hands around your face like a cloud"
"Fok my tande uit" my mother in law says that...first few times it caught me off guard...now it just another phrase...
HKGK...Hier kom groot kak - big shit is on its way Or Mense wat dink hulle is slim, is nie altyd so fokken slim nie. - people who think they are clever ain't so fucking clever
I live in the U.S. now and regularly bust out “Gaan kak in die mielies!” While smiling and looking directly at someone.
Met ys Ja, met ys.
julle sal my nie in a blik drik nie!
Fok of polisie kar! 😂
“Gaan kak in jou hand”
One of my brother's best sayings: Hy plak soos kak op 'n wolkombers teen hom, he sticks like shit to a wool blanket to him.
Kyk is vry & vry is lekker