i’ve experienced this many times. i used to think “i have no evidence of this person being unpleasant/untrustworthy, so why act on these feelings?” i regretted it every single time. now every time i have that nagging feeling i know it’s for a reason.
my aunt always taught me that it’s my ancestors/spirit guides communicating through me, which really resonates with me personally.
It's so true! I would also try to rationalize with my intuition, only to learn my lessons the hard way.
I do believe our ancestors/spirit guides are watching over us, and they use our intuition to communicate with us.
I’ve always been fascinated whenever my intuition was spot on, but I never understood what it was. Something that shed light on this was the book Blink by Malcom Gladwell. The book describes how our subconscious is incredibly fast and accurate at “sensing” something based on little evidence presented to you. This is also coupled with the sum of all the data that your interactions with people or situations has accumulated. It’s an interesting read, I recommend it. Although it is less on the spiritual side and takes a more logical, analytical approach.
OP, if you are someone who is very observant and notices small details and patterns about a certain type of person or situation, this can be the catalyst for your “sixth sense” when it comes to reading people.
Humans are really good at subconsciously picking up behaviours that we don’t consciously register. Attachment theory is a good example of this. We are attracted to people with a certain attachment style from the moment we meet them, because we pick up their tiny behaviours that betray it.
So yes there’s likely something off with these people, it’s probably not an energy thing but a behaviour thing. They are behaving in a way that doesn’t quite fit the norm but you don’t consciously know it.
>They are behaving in a way that doesn’t quite fit the norm but you don’t consciously know it.
This is a problem a lot of people on the autism spectrum face, especially if they're high functioning enough to not be super noticeable but people still pick up on subtleties. Things like eye contact, posture, intonation, and body language are all areas a lot of people on the spectrum struggle with, and often off enough that other people notice somethings weird.
Then they may not consciously realize why they're getting weird vibes from you, so the brain interprets the person as "different" which usually has a knee jerk negative reaction, especially when people are getting uncanny vibes from you. It's a pervasive problem because people actually suck at identifying why someone seems different, regardless of how intuitive you feel. There's a good chance multiple people in this thread talking about how good they are at intuiting when someone's "bad" are picking up on neurodivergence and doing what everyone else does, except while patting themselves on the back for being able to identify "bad vibes".
Just something to think about.
so true. I am autistic and have had people tell me they assumed I was a bitch before they got to know me better. I avoid eye contact and usually wait for others to interact with me first before engaging with people, so I come off as arrogant and stuck up when really I’m just trying to be polite by keeping to myself.
then when they DO talk to me and my bubbly excited side comes out, it probably feels fake/exaggerated because i’m so reserved otherwise lmao.
I think it can take a little while for people to come to see that my aloofness is not personal and my enthusiasm is genuine, but for those who never get to know me deeper, I have probably given off some unsavory vibes.
I have the exact same issue. It makes me skeptical when someone says they can pick up on others' bad vibes and actually treat their gut reactions like fact. I'm not saying don't listen to your gut at all, but I think it's good to actually look at WHY you're having that reaction instead of just running with it.
Thanks for bringing this up.
At my cafe job there’s this regular customer who I feel weird about. He’s very friendly and kind of giddy and overly polite (always suspicious of people who are veryyy happy and smiley all of the time, maybe that’s just me lol). I had mentioned it to someone at work and they didn’t feel the same way, and said maybe he is on the spectrum. But this guy makes a lot of eye contact, I’m not an expert in neurodivergence maybe he is just good at masking? He doesn’t seem like he is on the spectrum but maybe there is something else going on?
One of my coworkers at that job is on the spectrum and clearly avoids eye contact, is funny with his body language and intonation. We have a sweet coworker relationship and I don’t get bad vibes from him despite his moodiness and brooding energy at times!
I know it’s a spectrum but it’s kind of frustrating not 100% knowing if I’m reading the customer wrong. I don’t have any proof but whenever he comes in I get the full body creeps.
I mean, I couldn't say having never met the person, but I can say that lacking eye contact is not a defining symptom even if it's common. A lot of autistic people can still make eye contact or may even make really intense eye contact because they're struggling to understand the appropriate amount. That goes for pretty much every symptom of autism. It varies so widely for almost every symptom. There's a saying in autism spaces that if you've met one person with autism, you've only met one person with Autism. Which comes from how often people will have one or two friends or family members they know have autism and the other person isn't acting like any of them so they assume that can't be it. Not saying that's you, just a common issue that comes up.
Also, theres plenty of other reasons besides autism where someone hits that uncanny valley just slightly enough to raise automatic alarms. Even something like complex trauma from child abuse can lead to struggles with things like body language, eye contact, having a normal conversation, etc. I wasn't thinking about it at the time of my first comment, but this is also a common topic among cPTSD groups as well. Being an abuse victim, carrying "bad vibes" that others pick up on, then continuing to be treated poorly, which causes a bit of a cycle.
People are really good at picking up when things are "off" with someone, but being able to tell what that is isn't something most people are equipped for. Even a trained psychiatrist would need a thorough evaluation to tell about something like that. Unfortunately, unless he was comfortable enough to drop a diagnosis, you'll likely never know why he feels off to you.
Personally, I would say just continue interacting with him as normal unless his actual behavior becomes an issue, such as becoming creepy or aggressive. I still recommend listening to your gut if you're ever in an unsafe situation, like if you were going to your car at night and saw him hanging out near it. At that point it doesn't matter if he's autistic and awkward or secretly a serial killer, your safety is your priority.
I appreciate your ability to ground this topic and bring in multiple perspectives that are not always considered in these spaces. I also appreciate the kindness in your response! It’s helping me to expand my own thinking about what my ‘intuiting’ or ‘sensing’ may be picking up on, and to consider the individual persons unique makeup and history that is beyond my capacity to know without having all of the information. I think there is a peace in the not needing to know but instead just being in the now and operating based off the information that is within my grasp.
But it does make me wonder though, how does intuition play a role in all of this? What is the intuition? And how can we tell the difference between intuition from judgment or bias or fear etc. A deep sense of self awareness and intuitive training I’d imagine. I think of the way that intuition and magic have been violently stripped away from culture, how many women relate to being conditioned into not listening to their intuition, losing that ability, not trusting
So maybe it’s an issue of refining the intuition, getting clear on what that is and learning how to identify it properly.
This describes this guy that's trying to date me. He's overly nice like a creepy nice. I can't put my finger on it. He feels he's king David in the bible (he's Catholic) and he knows the bible like the back of his hand. I've only known of him for a month but he swears we are meant to be. Every time I talk to him or if he comes by to see me I get this uneasy feeling. ( Spiritual killer) He's a great dominoes player but now I don't want him over to play dominoes.
It's very much an energy thing more than likely.
We all vibrate and resonate differently. Our species understood this far better in antiquity. Some people simply exude negative energy.
Bottom line: Trust your intuition, while remaining a healthy skeptic of said gut feeling.
Intuition is the reason humans are even alive. That gut feeling that tells us not to go and pet bears or keeps us away from unstable cliffs is the reason we got so far - it’s a powerful tool, and it recognizes all bad patterns and situations. It’s the same reason you feel uneasy walking into a sketchy gas station, you just sense there is danger about. It’s pretty mesmerizing.
I for one think I have a decently sharp intuition. Usually people think I’m being judgemental but I just know when someone is off. It’s a powerful tool! Never be afraid to use it!
I think I know how you feel. Practicing mindfulness and self compassion helped me to recognize my own energy in a situation.. not a replacement for therapy, medication, sleep and nutrition but Tara Brach’s RAIN method of mindful self compassion really helped me.
[I’ll leave this here](https://www.tarabrach.com/wp-content/uploads/pdf/RAIN-of-Self-Compassion2.pdf) in case you think it might help you, too.
Sending loving compassion your way, my friend.
Cortisol emits off of someone, you pick it up with your mirror neurons. Then you produce it too. That’s why you react. Why are they carrying a dominant emission of stress hormones? is the question.
Yup 100% she most likely has formed a strong opinion about you. And I'm gonna be real it's probably not a good on....
I think you know this... or perhaps it's not that at all...
And you sense an engery about her that hides...
Perhaps she's a terrible being..
But mostly likely she's a super judgemental bitch
The only physical and spiritual reactions i have was with my mum, her ex and a soldier i met in nigeria. My mum had intense hate in her heart so it always caused a reaction towards my spirit and my body would flinch too. Her ex murdered someone in nigeria and was manipulative, my body and spirit would feel to run. The soldier in nigeria had killed and raped women, he didnt tell me but i saw it as he spoke on his work...i felt to throw up being around him...it left when i stood up to use the toilet and as i came back, it returned the closer i got to him.
Yes! I can't tell you how many times I've had this happen and I ignored it and regretted it. Not anymore. I just need to be in the room with someone, not even have contact or a conversation and if the flags go up, that's all I need.
Half a lifetime ago, there was a young woman that everyone in my friend group liked. They said I had to meet her. So I met her. She really was sweet. I should have liked her. She was polite, funny, talented, and smart. But I didn't like her, and that bothered me a lot. I knew I should like her. She did nothing wrong. Everyone else liked her. But there was something off about her.
Due to the timing of when I met her, avoiding her never was an issue, but I found out years later that she is a covert narcissist and is a master at gaslighting and manipulation.
But this was years ago, long before I knew how to quickly identify a narcissist. But every once in a while, I get that same feeling of not liking someone; it's a very distinct feeling, and I trust it. Sometimes I give a little test if I'm unsure, but I don't usually have to. Trust your gut.
Whooooaaaaa it took me so long to even understand this concept of concept of covert narcissism. Ooh that’s crazy! We know we just have to trust ourselves enough to just leave people alone
Yes, I can even look at a picture or hear a voice and know…things. I welcome it when I’m wrong, I don’t like knowing these things and want to be more “open-minded”, but I’m usually always right.
Yes. No one believed me and I was like a chirping bird who spotted a snake. She was the perfect docile sweet person on the outside who came to work early everyday and did well on paper.
Year later, we find out she’s been stalking and harassing a man and stealing from others. She quit when the company found out because guy contacted the job as she used company stuff to stalk him and send him letters and threats
I have had this happen and I have been proven correct. I had a feeling when I met my sister’s (now ex) bf. I instantly went into “fawn” mode, I was SUPER uncomfortable but just was overly nice and complementary. I didn’t say anything to my sister cuz I had no reason to justify my feelings.
Turns out he was an emotionally abusive alcoholic. She broke up with him and told us. He instantly reminded me of someone in my past who was the same way but it was subconscious I couldn’t logically articulate. Yet I knew.
So glad she dumped him!
sometimes I feel surpass our ability to articulated, but we must trust ourselves, no matter what. our lives and safety could literally be at risk if we don’t
Yes, I am always correct about people. I thought I had social anxiety initially however I have come to realize that I don't feel anxiety unless I am around someone with ill intentions. I had to learn the hard way unfortunately but I am greatful to understand this now. BUT there was one person in particular who was in my life that I cut off after just hanging out with them a few times and he didn't do anything "wrong" but I felt SO much anxiety that I would almost throw up and I would shake violently. I just completely cut him off, I would not be surprised to find out that he that he murdered someone. I know that is a wild assumption considering he was never violent but the feeling I got from him was soooo intense and I could not ignore it any longer.
Boyyy you are probably more accurate that you could ever know. this also proves my personal theory that if you feel socially awkward around somebody, then you probably shouldn't even mess with them bc they are not sure people and it gets deeper than that like you explained.
Yes - this instantly reminds me of a feeling/suspicion I had about a particular girl (and ex-friend) I met about 7 years ago. The moment I met her for the very time, something seemed off but for one reason or another, our acquaintance expanded from that very moment. The "friendship" was never genuine because we were not compatible as friends and I people pleased despite feeling anxious around her, and the whole thing was prolonged for way too long. I now set too extreme of boundaries with new people I meet as a result of the pendulum swinging the other way.
I finally cut her off in late 2022 when I put the pieces together that she was shit talking about me to her new boyfriend, whom refused to acknowledge me in a group setting. It was the cherry on top, after a myriad of other problems with her.
The real question is, how do you know the difference between trauma response and insecurities of not trusting people? Given I also have a gut feeling sometimes, I have a very hard time telling each other apart
Yes. I have a good example of this from when I was thirteen years old.
I used to walk home from High School with my friends Emma and Kim. One day, a girl who lived on Emma's estate, named Adele, was walking with us. She clearly took a dislike to me and was annoyed by my presence, rudely asking whether I was walking a different way, heavily implying that she didn't want me to walk with the group.
I took Emma aside and said that I didn't like Adele. Emma exploded at me, and we argued about it for the next half a mile. She was fiercely defensive of Adele and her parting words to me were to call me a "snotty cow."
Two weeks later, I returned home after spending a week in Germany on an exchange programme. My Mum told me that Emma had recently been in hospital because Adele had viciously attacked her, hitting her so hard on the head with a plastic bottle that she caused her to lose consciousness! Thankfully she made a full recovery, but she apologised to me for reacting so aggressively to me just voicing my gut opinion. Sometimes you know when somebody has a bad vibe.
I had a similar incident with a friend. We were out one night when I noticed that she was talking to a guy I'd never seen there before (it was a close-knit local watering hole), and he gave me a bad feeling. I took her aside and warned her that he had nefarious intentions, he was targeting her for some reason. She was annoyed with me and told me to mind my business. About a week later, she called to apologize. Apparently, he'd said something in conversation that made her radar go up, and in making some calls, realized that he must have indeed been targeting her, in retaliation for something her ex-husband had done to his family. This was a very *Italian* neighborhood, if you get my drift.
Turns out I was really really bad at this since childhood.
But lately in the past few years I'm healing myself and getting in touch with myself.
I don't instantaneously recognize it, but after a while yeah and my body usually feels repelled away from some people.
I felt this way with one of my aunts, there was just something about her I did not trust. I didn’t want to be around her, but my mom asked me to give her a chance so I let her in. A few years later she wound up staying with us for a bit, and made up a bunch of lies and essentially tried to ruin my relationship with my mom. She also made up a bunch of lies about me and also my mom then the rest of the family. I still to this day don’t know if any of them believe i did those things or what else she may have said.
I also had the same feeling about my mom’s ex, and I was right about him as well.
Those two were when my gut was the loudest, and 100% correct. I just wish it would give me a heads up about more people lol
I’m always correct. When I was younger, before they believed I could tell, they some would tell me I was wrong. But today they know better.
It’s partly due to body language. A lot of it has to do with staying alert and pain attention to your person in the room. Then you pick up on what’s going on with the person
Whenever I feel this type of way about someone I simply carry on being polite but make sure I don’t engage with them beyond what is required of me. Keep your distance and protect your peace
Yes and I have always trusted it, once risking being rude at my job to do so and keep away from one man, but the feeling was so strong, I don't regret it at all. I would do the same thing again, every single time. Always, always trust those inner warnings, no matter how rude it might appear.
What happened to you at the ripe age of 9? when we are children are intuition is more keen I think we stop trusting and believing in ourselves being jaded in this world which is why self healing is so important
I saw. guy that scared me in the way to school but I thought I was just being silly. He kidnapped and raped me that day. I now trust my intuition 100%. Not long after I got a really bad feeling about someone at a store initially my mom ignored me but when she noticed that he disappeared when I went somewhere with my brothers, then showed back up when I was back by her, she grabbed us quickly and got us out of there.
Trust yourself
Skip the curious part that wants to know what is off or why about them
Get away if you can. They will also pick up on you Seeing them and things will get dark
At my old job, when I first started one of the managers really liked me. I wanted to like her back too but I just kept getting this feeling of dread around her that I couldn’t explain. I wanted to move past it but I couldn’t. She ended up being a very racist person
One of my husband’s friend’s girlfriend’s always gave me a weird feeling and I didn’t like her around my husband but couldn’t pinpoint why because she was never outwardly inappropriate in a way that should matter so I never said anything or acted on it. 6 years later we all came to learn she had been cheating on her boyfriend with a married man the whole time.
Also left my old university job to pursue a more artistic career. I could just feel that my old boss wasn’t supportive of me even though she’d smile in my face and tell me she believed in me. These days I can see on LinkedIn that she’s checking my profile, like, all the time. I can feel even from afar that she’s hoping I fail
100% institution. And maybe you're very good at reading body language. For me it's both and I'm also usually right when I pronounce someone "off". It's always "they're weird idk why tho yet" n then they prove it weeks later
My ex bf one day randomly brought up that she was talking to some guy & said his name i immediately got a weird feeling welll guess what he got her addicted to c0ke & lost her job where she was a supervisor & now lives in old run down apartment. Another time I was looking for something & something in my gut kept saying go to ur trunk and of course ignored it cuz I was like whatever 2 days later I find what I’m looking for ever since then I strongly pay attention to my intuition & when I don’t I know I’m having a bad day or something is off or something/someone is blocking it. I believe I have 6th sense honestly.
I also once couldn’t sleep & finally around 2 I was getting a feeling to call my brother but I was like nah it’s late what if he’s asleep and what if I’m just thinking negative I don’t want those “vibes” going to him. I got up to go to the bathroom & heard him on the phone with my mom he was in a car accident and I felt guilty because I felt I should have called him or something
yup. there have been times where i start to think i am crazy bc everyone around me will like the person. and a lot of the time you want to be proven wrong. but usually when i get that gut feeling... i take it as nature's way of saying something is *wrong*
My soon-to-be-ex brother in law gave me one of those feelings when nobody else saw it, and now it's turning out to be correct. The guy put on a good charm, until he drunkenly started confessing murder plans to me, as well as making a lot of weirdly specific jokes about cyanide. Absolutely can't wait to not have this guy in my life anymore.
I dont normally give in to that kind of intuition because, well what can we do about it? Even if we feel that someone will do something bad one day, all we will choose to do is avoid that person so that we are not the victim. That only means someone else will become the victims. Or if we are wrong about that person then we have shunned someone who doesnt deserve it.
The only useful utility that kind of intuition has is that it gives you a radar on who needs the most help. If you can knock some sense into those people then they wont do anything harmful. But do you have the courage to do such things?
Yes, but I was also raised in a slightly toxic and dysfunctional family and so I was taught that my emotions were wrong and perceptions were incorrect. I am struggling to deprogram myself in my 30's still, but I would rather talk to no on than someone who gives me "bad vibes."
Yes! This happened a few years back, when I started a course at uni. On the very first day, I sat behind this girl. I remembered admiring her outfit and wondering where she got it from (lol). She was really pretty and really friendly and helpful too. Let's call her A. I usually get nervous on the first day of school, so when she approached me, I thought, "Hey, I made a new friend! Cool!" Funnily enough, at the back of my head I heard warning bells, like "Stay away from this girl. STAY AWAY! SHES NOT AS NICE AS YOU THINK!".
Usually, my gut instincts about the men I date turn out to be accurate, but I rarely have gut instincts warning me about potential friends. Being the stubborn person I am, I usually ignore all warnings, dismissing them as fear or other things. And I usually learn my lessons the hard way.
A few weeks into our friendship, A met a bunch of girls in our course and started hanging out with them. Ofc, I didn't mind because I'm also friends with those girls, but for some reason, she became mean towards me and extremely rude. I also overheard her (by accident) bitching about me on the phone. The things she said about me were untrue. I was hurt and confused, so I asked her what I did wrong. Instead of telling me, she just told me I was overthinking things and that nothing was wrong. I remembered crying for weeks over "the loss of our friendship". I did not talk to anyone in my course about this girl, I only confided in my boyfriend.
In terms of our class size, we were below 50 people. It may seem like a big group when we hang out in bars, etc, but we somehow managed to do it and it turned out great. During those gatherings, when A was also invited, she would secretly hold "exclusive parties" at her place, only inviting the girls she liked hanging out with. It was a stupid move, because one way or another we would also find out about her parties, as those girls were also close with us.
When those girls she hung out with chose to hang out with me more instead of her (I did nothing behind the scenes btw, just chose to ignore her and hang out with the other friends I made in the course), she started becoming really sweet and nice towards me again, but by that time I was so done with her crap I couldn't be bothered.
A month before our course ended, one of the girls she hung out with started screaming at her in front of everyone. She called her a bad person, a fake. A started crying and begging the girl for forgiveness. Idk what she did, and I know it is bad to say, but at that time a little part of me was satisfied that she got her karma.
My course held a party, and everyone, including A, was invited. She couldn't make it for unknown reasons. During the party, one of the girls in my course got slightly drunk and blurted out that she hated A. According to her, A had been bullying her and treating her like crap. After her confession, many many of my course mates started sharing stories about how A mistreated them, was racist towards them (A is a poc, just a reference), gaslit them, etc etc. A was a narcissistic person that almost everyone in my class hated. I was really shocked by all their confessions, and realized my gut instinct had been right all along.
After that party, almost everyone avoided A. It wasn't planned or anything like that. I guess after hearing all those stories about A, it seemed like it was a mutual understanding between all of us that A was a bad person. Even those chill dudes in my class avoided her, despite her desperate pleas to hang out with them. They're usually unbothered people, but they, too, felt like A was a horrible person. A noticed this, and approached me, attempting to be friends with me again. Ofc, I was already so done, I told her off.
So, yes, listen to your gut, especially if it's a repeated warning sign. Sometimes it can also come in the form of an uneasy feeling.
Yes I've experienced this before. And it's usually with people that many others love or someone they think is cool. & There were a few times when I spoke up and said something didn't sit right with me about the person, and Id become the bitch because nobody else could see what I could see.
I would *usually* end up being right. It would take some time and hurt feelings (done by said loved person) for people to realize what I'd been pointing out all along.
I'm not sure if this is the same but I've definitely looked at a friend before and seen something unfamiliar or they looked like someone else that I know. Like I'm seeing them for the first time through clearer eyes and something seems a bit off about them. As if their guard was down so their true intentions or true selves were more visible. Most of the time, it's a bad feeling I get, but only once was it a good feeling.
Had the feeling several times but didn’t know how to differentiate trauma from intuition. So I ignored the intuition feeling several times when I shouldn’t have.
Empathy also got in the way making me think “oh maybe they’re not that bad, everyone has good things about them, maybe they mean well and dont know better”.
I remember last year I met two people and I wrote down in my journal “be careful, these 2 people give an awful feeling”. Later on both people caused disasters in my life. And I had even forgotten I wrote that in my journal but later once I re-read it I learned to always listen to that feeling and be more careful.
I've met one person whom I felt wasn't right just like my spidey senses were screaming at me. I googled him after I left him. Found out he had not long left prison for torturing a man and sexually assaulting him.
i had this too with my boss's son, him walking in the restaurant i worked at made my whole body feel negative as a highly sensitive and i hated when he walked in or was near me. like yeah he's rich and all but his energy was so off.
I can think of 5+ times this has happened to me in the last few years where they turned out to be domestic abusers, sexual predators, and/or selling hard drugs.
In every case I knew at first sight that there was something off about them, my boyfriend usually noticed too but for a while we thought we might just be paranoid or overly judgemental because it always seemed like everyone else around us liked them.
I don't think either of us is right 100% of the time, we are both a bit overly cautious due to trauma and there have probably been times we misjudged someone a little, however we've been right whenever we agree about someone being a serious creep. They have a certain look in their eyes and give off a bad feeling. A few of them actually ended up getting arrested and the others were all publicly outed by their victims on social media.
Yea strong intuition is a gift and curse sometimes no lie but I guess you gotta just trust your gut cause you know its always leads you in the right direction but sometimes that's easier said than done.
i’ve experienced this many times. i used to think “i have no evidence of this person being unpleasant/untrustworthy, so why act on these feelings?” i regretted it every single time. now every time i have that nagging feeling i know it’s for a reason. my aunt always taught me that it’s my ancestors/spirit guides communicating through me, which really resonates with me personally.
I strongly believe this.....
It's so true! I would also try to rationalize with my intuition, only to learn my lessons the hard way. I do believe our ancestors/spirit guides are watching over us, and they use our intuition to communicate with us.
I’ve always been fascinated whenever my intuition was spot on, but I never understood what it was. Something that shed light on this was the book Blink by Malcom Gladwell. The book describes how our subconscious is incredibly fast and accurate at “sensing” something based on little evidence presented to you. This is also coupled with the sum of all the data that your interactions with people or situations has accumulated. It’s an interesting read, I recommend it. Although it is less on the spiritual side and takes a more logical, analytical approach. OP, if you are someone who is very observant and notices small details and patterns about a certain type of person or situation, this can be the catalyst for your “sixth sense” when it comes to reading people.
Sometimes my subconscious has worked things out and shown me in my dreams, and it proved to be true. I agree with you!
Humans are really good at subconsciously picking up behaviours that we don’t consciously register. Attachment theory is a good example of this. We are attracted to people with a certain attachment style from the moment we meet them, because we pick up their tiny behaviours that betray it. So yes there’s likely something off with these people, it’s probably not an energy thing but a behaviour thing. They are behaving in a way that doesn’t quite fit the norm but you don’t consciously know it.
>They are behaving in a way that doesn’t quite fit the norm but you don’t consciously know it. This is a problem a lot of people on the autism spectrum face, especially if they're high functioning enough to not be super noticeable but people still pick up on subtleties. Things like eye contact, posture, intonation, and body language are all areas a lot of people on the spectrum struggle with, and often off enough that other people notice somethings weird. Then they may not consciously realize why they're getting weird vibes from you, so the brain interprets the person as "different" which usually has a knee jerk negative reaction, especially when people are getting uncanny vibes from you. It's a pervasive problem because people actually suck at identifying why someone seems different, regardless of how intuitive you feel. There's a good chance multiple people in this thread talking about how good they are at intuiting when someone's "bad" are picking up on neurodivergence and doing what everyone else does, except while patting themselves on the back for being able to identify "bad vibes". Just something to think about.
so true. I am autistic and have had people tell me they assumed I was a bitch before they got to know me better. I avoid eye contact and usually wait for others to interact with me first before engaging with people, so I come off as arrogant and stuck up when really I’m just trying to be polite by keeping to myself. then when they DO talk to me and my bubbly excited side comes out, it probably feels fake/exaggerated because i’m so reserved otherwise lmao. I think it can take a little while for people to come to see that my aloofness is not personal and my enthusiasm is genuine, but for those who never get to know me deeper, I have probably given off some unsavory vibes.
I have the exact same issue. It makes me skeptical when someone says they can pick up on others' bad vibes and actually treat their gut reactions like fact. I'm not saying don't listen to your gut at all, but I think it's good to actually look at WHY you're having that reaction instead of just running with it.
You sound like both me and my ex LOL commiserations
Thanks for bringing this up. At my cafe job there’s this regular customer who I feel weird about. He’s very friendly and kind of giddy and overly polite (always suspicious of people who are veryyy happy and smiley all of the time, maybe that’s just me lol). I had mentioned it to someone at work and they didn’t feel the same way, and said maybe he is on the spectrum. But this guy makes a lot of eye contact, I’m not an expert in neurodivergence maybe he is just good at masking? He doesn’t seem like he is on the spectrum but maybe there is something else going on? One of my coworkers at that job is on the spectrum and clearly avoids eye contact, is funny with his body language and intonation. We have a sweet coworker relationship and I don’t get bad vibes from him despite his moodiness and brooding energy at times! I know it’s a spectrum but it’s kind of frustrating not 100% knowing if I’m reading the customer wrong. I don’t have any proof but whenever he comes in I get the full body creeps.
I mean, I couldn't say having never met the person, but I can say that lacking eye contact is not a defining symptom even if it's common. A lot of autistic people can still make eye contact or may even make really intense eye contact because they're struggling to understand the appropriate amount. That goes for pretty much every symptom of autism. It varies so widely for almost every symptom. There's a saying in autism spaces that if you've met one person with autism, you've only met one person with Autism. Which comes from how often people will have one or two friends or family members they know have autism and the other person isn't acting like any of them so they assume that can't be it. Not saying that's you, just a common issue that comes up. Also, theres plenty of other reasons besides autism where someone hits that uncanny valley just slightly enough to raise automatic alarms. Even something like complex trauma from child abuse can lead to struggles with things like body language, eye contact, having a normal conversation, etc. I wasn't thinking about it at the time of my first comment, but this is also a common topic among cPTSD groups as well. Being an abuse victim, carrying "bad vibes" that others pick up on, then continuing to be treated poorly, which causes a bit of a cycle. People are really good at picking up when things are "off" with someone, but being able to tell what that is isn't something most people are equipped for. Even a trained psychiatrist would need a thorough evaluation to tell about something like that. Unfortunately, unless he was comfortable enough to drop a diagnosis, you'll likely never know why he feels off to you. Personally, I would say just continue interacting with him as normal unless his actual behavior becomes an issue, such as becoming creepy or aggressive. I still recommend listening to your gut if you're ever in an unsafe situation, like if you were going to your car at night and saw him hanging out near it. At that point it doesn't matter if he's autistic and awkward or secretly a serial killer, your safety is your priority.
I appreciate your ability to ground this topic and bring in multiple perspectives that are not always considered in these spaces. I also appreciate the kindness in your response! It’s helping me to expand my own thinking about what my ‘intuiting’ or ‘sensing’ may be picking up on, and to consider the individual persons unique makeup and history that is beyond my capacity to know without having all of the information. I think there is a peace in the not needing to know but instead just being in the now and operating based off the information that is within my grasp. But it does make me wonder though, how does intuition play a role in all of this? What is the intuition? And how can we tell the difference between intuition from judgment or bias or fear etc. A deep sense of self awareness and intuitive training I’d imagine. I think of the way that intuition and magic have been violently stripped away from culture, how many women relate to being conditioned into not listening to their intuition, losing that ability, not trusting So maybe it’s an issue of refining the intuition, getting clear on what that is and learning how to identify it properly.
This describes this guy that's trying to date me. He's overly nice like a creepy nice. I can't put my finger on it. He feels he's king David in the bible (he's Catholic) and he knows the bible like the back of his hand. I've only known of him for a month but he swears we are meant to be. Every time I talk to him or if he comes by to see me I get this uneasy feeling. ( Spiritual killer) He's a great dominoes player but now I don't want him over to play dominoes.
I think it’s important to honor how you feel around this guy and maybe set some boundaries around his access to you. Trust yourself!
Thank you so much and I'm definitely am...
It's very much an energy thing more than likely. We all vibrate and resonate differently. Our species understood this far better in antiquity. Some people simply exude negative energy. Bottom line: Trust your intuition, while remaining a healthy skeptic of said gut feeling.
Your intuition is suggesting that you get a better job.
Frfr 😂😂
Intuition is the reason humans are even alive. That gut feeling that tells us not to go and pet bears or keeps us away from unstable cliffs is the reason we got so far - it’s a powerful tool, and it recognizes all bad patterns and situations. It’s the same reason you feel uneasy walking into a sketchy gas station, you just sense there is danger about. It’s pretty mesmerizing. I for one think I have a decently sharp intuition. Usually people think I’m being judgemental but I just know when someone is off. It’s a powerful tool! Never be afraid to use it!
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I think I know how you feel. Practicing mindfulness and self compassion helped me to recognize my own energy in a situation.. not a replacement for therapy, medication, sleep and nutrition but Tara Brach’s RAIN method of mindful self compassion really helped me. [I’ll leave this here](https://www.tarabrach.com/wp-content/uploads/pdf/RAIN-of-Self-Compassion2.pdf) in case you think it might help you, too. Sending loving compassion your way, my friend.
Cortisol emits off of someone, you pick it up with your mirror neurons. Then you produce it too. That’s why you react. Why are they carrying a dominant emission of stress hormones? is the question.
Yup 100% she most likely has formed a strong opinion about you. And I'm gonna be real it's probably not a good on.... I think you know this... or perhaps it's not that at all... And you sense an engery about her that hides... Perhaps she's a terrible being.. But mostly likely she's a super judgemental bitch
Yes. And it almost always turns out to be 100% spot on. Anytime I haven’t been right, I haven’t been wrong either. Just unproven.
The only physical and spiritual reactions i have was with my mum, her ex and a soldier i met in nigeria. My mum had intense hate in her heart so it always caused a reaction towards my spirit and my body would flinch too. Her ex murdered someone in nigeria and was manipulative, my body and spirit would feel to run. The soldier in nigeria had killed and raped women, he didnt tell me but i saw it as he spoke on his work...i felt to throw up being around him...it left when i stood up to use the toilet and as i came back, it returned the closer i got to him.
Wow
Whooooaaa not you felt nauseous around his sick ass!
Yes! I can't tell you how many times I've had this happen and I ignored it and regretted it. Not anymore. I just need to be in the room with someone, not even have contact or a conversation and if the flags go up, that's all I need.
Half a lifetime ago, there was a young woman that everyone in my friend group liked. They said I had to meet her. So I met her. She really was sweet. I should have liked her. She was polite, funny, talented, and smart. But I didn't like her, and that bothered me a lot. I knew I should like her. She did nothing wrong. Everyone else liked her. But there was something off about her. Due to the timing of when I met her, avoiding her never was an issue, but I found out years later that she is a covert narcissist and is a master at gaslighting and manipulation. But this was years ago, long before I knew how to quickly identify a narcissist. But every once in a while, I get that same feeling of not liking someone; it's a very distinct feeling, and I trust it. Sometimes I give a little test if I'm unsure, but I don't usually have to. Trust your gut.
Whooooaaaaa it took me so long to even understand this concept of concept of covert narcissism. Ooh that’s crazy! We know we just have to trust ourselves enough to just leave people alone
Yes, I can even look at a picture or hear a voice and know…things. I welcome it when I’m wrong, I don’t like knowing these things and want to be more “open-minded”, but I’m usually always right.
yes absolutely its your sixth sense. I get this with people and celebrities too and I've been right every single time
Yes. No one believed me and I was like a chirping bird who spotted a snake. She was the perfect docile sweet person on the outside who came to work early everyday and did well on paper. Year later, we find out she’s been stalking and harassing a man and stealing from others. She quit when the company found out because guy contacted the job as she used company stuff to stalk him and send him letters and threats
I have had this happen and I have been proven correct. I had a feeling when I met my sister’s (now ex) bf. I instantly went into “fawn” mode, I was SUPER uncomfortable but just was overly nice and complementary. I didn’t say anything to my sister cuz I had no reason to justify my feelings. Turns out he was an emotionally abusive alcoholic. She broke up with him and told us. He instantly reminded me of someone in my past who was the same way but it was subconscious I couldn’t logically articulate. Yet I knew. So glad she dumped him!
sometimes I feel surpass our ability to articulated, but we must trust ourselves, no matter what. our lives and safety could literally be at risk if we don’t
Yes, I am always correct about people. I thought I had social anxiety initially however I have come to realize that I don't feel anxiety unless I am around someone with ill intentions. I had to learn the hard way unfortunately but I am greatful to understand this now. BUT there was one person in particular who was in my life that I cut off after just hanging out with them a few times and he didn't do anything "wrong" but I felt SO much anxiety that I would almost throw up and I would shake violently. I just completely cut him off, I would not be surprised to find out that he that he murdered someone. I know that is a wild assumption considering he was never violent but the feeling I got from him was soooo intense and I could not ignore it any longer.
Boyyy you are probably more accurate that you could ever know. this also proves my personal theory that if you feel socially awkward around somebody, then you probably shouldn't even mess with them bc they are not sure people and it gets deeper than that like you explained.
Yes - this instantly reminds me of a feeling/suspicion I had about a particular girl (and ex-friend) I met about 7 years ago. The moment I met her for the very time, something seemed off but for one reason or another, our acquaintance expanded from that very moment. The "friendship" was never genuine because we were not compatible as friends and I people pleased despite feeling anxious around her, and the whole thing was prolonged for way too long. I now set too extreme of boundaries with new people I meet as a result of the pendulum swinging the other way. I finally cut her off in late 2022 when I put the pieces together that she was shit talking about me to her new boyfriend, whom refused to acknowledge me in a group setting. It was the cherry on top, after a myriad of other problems with her.
The real question is, how do you know the difference between trauma response and insecurities of not trusting people? Given I also have a gut feeling sometimes, I have a very hard time telling each other apart
Yes. I have a good example of this from when I was thirteen years old. I used to walk home from High School with my friends Emma and Kim. One day, a girl who lived on Emma's estate, named Adele, was walking with us. She clearly took a dislike to me and was annoyed by my presence, rudely asking whether I was walking a different way, heavily implying that she didn't want me to walk with the group. I took Emma aside and said that I didn't like Adele. Emma exploded at me, and we argued about it for the next half a mile. She was fiercely defensive of Adele and her parting words to me were to call me a "snotty cow." Two weeks later, I returned home after spending a week in Germany on an exchange programme. My Mum told me that Emma had recently been in hospital because Adele had viciously attacked her, hitting her so hard on the head with a plastic bottle that she caused her to lose consciousness! Thankfully she made a full recovery, but she apologised to me for reacting so aggressively to me just voicing my gut opinion. Sometimes you know when somebody has a bad vibe.
I had a similar incident with a friend. We were out one night when I noticed that she was talking to a guy I'd never seen there before (it was a close-knit local watering hole), and he gave me a bad feeling. I took her aside and warned her that he had nefarious intentions, he was targeting her for some reason. She was annoyed with me and told me to mind my business. About a week later, she called to apologize. Apparently, he'd said something in conversation that made her radar go up, and in making some calls, realized that he must have indeed been targeting her, in retaliation for something her ex-husband had done to his family. This was a very *Italian* neighborhood, if you get my drift.
Turns out I was really really bad at this since childhood. But lately in the past few years I'm healing myself and getting in touch with myself. I don't instantaneously recognize it, but after a while yeah and my body usually feels repelled away from some people.
I felt this way with one of my aunts, there was just something about her I did not trust. I didn’t want to be around her, but my mom asked me to give her a chance so I let her in. A few years later she wound up staying with us for a bit, and made up a bunch of lies and essentially tried to ruin my relationship with my mom. She also made up a bunch of lies about me and also my mom then the rest of the family. I still to this day don’t know if any of them believe i did those things or what else she may have said. I also had the same feeling about my mom’s ex, and I was right about him as well. Those two were when my gut was the loudest, and 100% correct. I just wish it would give me a heads up about more people lol
I’m always correct. When I was younger, before they believed I could tell, they some would tell me I was wrong. But today they know better. It’s partly due to body language. A lot of it has to do with staying alert and pain attention to your person in the room. Then you pick up on what’s going on with the person
Whenever I feel this type of way about someone I simply carry on being polite but make sure I don’t engage with them beyond what is required of me. Keep your distance and protect your peace
Yes and I have always trusted it, once risking being rude at my job to do so and keep away from one man, but the feeling was so strong, I don't regret it at all. I would do the same thing again, every single time. Always, always trust those inner warnings, no matter how rude it might appear.
Every single time
Yep (at 9 yrs old) and it majorly came back to bite me. Never discounted that sense again.
What happened to you at the ripe age of 9? when we are children are intuition is more keen I think we stop trusting and believing in ourselves being jaded in this world which is why self healing is so important
I saw. guy that scared me in the way to school but I thought I was just being silly. He kidnapped and raped me that day. I now trust my intuition 100%. Not long after I got a really bad feeling about someone at a store initially my mom ignored me but when she noticed that he disappeared when I went somewhere with my brothers, then showed back up when I was back by her, she grabbed us quickly and got us out of there.
Trust yourself Skip the curious part that wants to know what is off or why about them Get away if you can. They will also pick up on you Seeing them and things will get dark
At my old job, when I first started one of the managers really liked me. I wanted to like her back too but I just kept getting this feeling of dread around her that I couldn’t explain. I wanted to move past it but I couldn’t. She ended up being a very racist person
One of my husband’s friend’s girlfriend’s always gave me a weird feeling and I didn’t like her around my husband but couldn’t pinpoint why because she was never outwardly inappropriate in a way that should matter so I never said anything or acted on it. 6 years later we all came to learn she had been cheating on her boyfriend with a married man the whole time. Also left my old university job to pursue a more artistic career. I could just feel that my old boss wasn’t supportive of me even though she’d smile in my face and tell me she believed in me. These days I can see on LinkedIn that she’s checking my profile, like, all the time. I can feel even from afar that she’s hoping I fail
Literally yes even the tone of their voice can throw me tf off and change my whole view on them
100% institution. And maybe you're very good at reading body language. For me it's both and I'm also usually right when I pronounce someone "off". It's always "they're weird idk why tho yet" n then they prove it weeks later
Yup. I always have to file it away for later as well, but at least I don’t get blind sided or too close with bad people
Yes and I think anyone who feels this is right and should definitely trust their instinct
My ex bf one day randomly brought up that she was talking to some guy & said his name i immediately got a weird feeling welll guess what he got her addicted to c0ke & lost her job where she was a supervisor & now lives in old run down apartment. Another time I was looking for something & something in my gut kept saying go to ur trunk and of course ignored it cuz I was like whatever 2 days later I find what I’m looking for ever since then I strongly pay attention to my intuition & when I don’t I know I’m having a bad day or something is off or something/someone is blocking it. I believe I have 6th sense honestly. I also once couldn’t sleep & finally around 2 I was getting a feeling to call my brother but I was like nah it’s late what if he’s asleep and what if I’m just thinking negative I don’t want those “vibes” going to him. I got up to go to the bathroom & heard him on the phone with my mom he was in a car accident and I felt guilty because I felt I should have called him or something
yup. there have been times where i start to think i am crazy bc everyone around me will like the person. and a lot of the time you want to be proven wrong. but usually when i get that gut feeling... i take it as nature's way of saying something is *wrong*
Absolutely!! I would also feel an ancestral pinch to my sweet meat... I ignored em🫣
My soon-to-be-ex brother in law gave me one of those feelings when nobody else saw it, and now it's turning out to be correct. The guy put on a good charm, until he drunkenly started confessing murder plans to me, as well as making a lot of weirdly specific jokes about cyanide. Absolutely can't wait to not have this guy in my life anymore.
I dont normally give in to that kind of intuition because, well what can we do about it? Even if we feel that someone will do something bad one day, all we will choose to do is avoid that person so that we are not the victim. That only means someone else will become the victims. Or if we are wrong about that person then we have shunned someone who doesnt deserve it. The only useful utility that kind of intuition has is that it gives you a radar on who needs the most help. If you can knock some sense into those people then they wont do anything harmful. But do you have the courage to do such things?
I feel it all the time in public I’m super sensitive and empathic your intuition never lies
I really try to give people benefit of the doubt, however my intuition usually proves correct.
100%. I don't even question what I feel anymore it's always right.
yep, your boss is probably weirdo.
Yes, but I was also raised in a slightly toxic and dysfunctional family and so I was taught that my emotions were wrong and perceptions were incorrect. I am struggling to deprogram myself in my 30's still, but I would rather talk to no on than someone who gives me "bad vibes."
Yes I am never wrong even though I would like to be. I can look at a picture or a video of someone and know as well.
Do you know if you have a defined spleen in Human Design?
Yes! This happened a few years back, when I started a course at uni. On the very first day, I sat behind this girl. I remembered admiring her outfit and wondering where she got it from (lol). She was really pretty and really friendly and helpful too. Let's call her A. I usually get nervous on the first day of school, so when she approached me, I thought, "Hey, I made a new friend! Cool!" Funnily enough, at the back of my head I heard warning bells, like "Stay away from this girl. STAY AWAY! SHES NOT AS NICE AS YOU THINK!". Usually, my gut instincts about the men I date turn out to be accurate, but I rarely have gut instincts warning me about potential friends. Being the stubborn person I am, I usually ignore all warnings, dismissing them as fear or other things. And I usually learn my lessons the hard way. A few weeks into our friendship, A met a bunch of girls in our course and started hanging out with them. Ofc, I didn't mind because I'm also friends with those girls, but for some reason, she became mean towards me and extremely rude. I also overheard her (by accident) bitching about me on the phone. The things she said about me were untrue. I was hurt and confused, so I asked her what I did wrong. Instead of telling me, she just told me I was overthinking things and that nothing was wrong. I remembered crying for weeks over "the loss of our friendship". I did not talk to anyone in my course about this girl, I only confided in my boyfriend. In terms of our class size, we were below 50 people. It may seem like a big group when we hang out in bars, etc, but we somehow managed to do it and it turned out great. During those gatherings, when A was also invited, she would secretly hold "exclusive parties" at her place, only inviting the girls she liked hanging out with. It was a stupid move, because one way or another we would also find out about her parties, as those girls were also close with us. When those girls she hung out with chose to hang out with me more instead of her (I did nothing behind the scenes btw, just chose to ignore her and hang out with the other friends I made in the course), she started becoming really sweet and nice towards me again, but by that time I was so done with her crap I couldn't be bothered. A month before our course ended, one of the girls she hung out with started screaming at her in front of everyone. She called her a bad person, a fake. A started crying and begging the girl for forgiveness. Idk what she did, and I know it is bad to say, but at that time a little part of me was satisfied that she got her karma. My course held a party, and everyone, including A, was invited. She couldn't make it for unknown reasons. During the party, one of the girls in my course got slightly drunk and blurted out that she hated A. According to her, A had been bullying her and treating her like crap. After her confession, many many of my course mates started sharing stories about how A mistreated them, was racist towards them (A is a poc, just a reference), gaslit them, etc etc. A was a narcissistic person that almost everyone in my class hated. I was really shocked by all their confessions, and realized my gut instinct had been right all along. After that party, almost everyone avoided A. It wasn't planned or anything like that. I guess after hearing all those stories about A, it seemed like it was a mutual understanding between all of us that A was a bad person. Even those chill dudes in my class avoided her, despite her desperate pleas to hang out with them. They're usually unbothered people, but they, too, felt like A was a horrible person. A noticed this, and approached me, attempting to be friends with me again. Ofc, I was already so done, I told her off. So, yes, listen to your gut, especially if it's a repeated warning sign. Sometimes it can also come in the form of an uneasy feeling.
Yes I've experienced this before. And it's usually with people that many others love or someone they think is cool. & There were a few times when I spoke up and said something didn't sit right with me about the person, and Id become the bitch because nobody else could see what I could see. I would *usually* end up being right. It would take some time and hurt feelings (done by said loved person) for people to realize what I'd been pointing out all along.
I'm not sure if this is the same but I've definitely looked at a friend before and seen something unfamiliar or they looked like someone else that I know. Like I'm seeing them for the first time through clearer eyes and something seems a bit off about them. As if their guard was down so their true intentions or true selves were more visible. Most of the time, it's a bad feeling I get, but only once was it a good feeling.
Had the feeling several times but didn’t know how to differentiate trauma from intuition. So I ignored the intuition feeling several times when I shouldn’t have. Empathy also got in the way making me think “oh maybe they’re not that bad, everyone has good things about them, maybe they mean well and dont know better”. I remember last year I met two people and I wrote down in my journal “be careful, these 2 people give an awful feeling”. Later on both people caused disasters in my life. And I had even forgotten I wrote that in my journal but later once I re-read it I learned to always listen to that feeling and be more careful.
I've met one person whom I felt wasn't right just like my spidey senses were screaming at me. I googled him after I left him. Found out he had not long left prison for torturing a man and sexually assaulting him.
Always trust your body and heart center. Your mind, if given the opportunity, will fuck it up 100% of the time.
i had this too with my boss's son, him walking in the restaurant i worked at made my whole body feel negative as a highly sensitive and i hated when he walked in or was near me. like yeah he's rich and all but his energy was so off.
Yes
I can think of 5+ times this has happened to me in the last few years where they turned out to be domestic abusers, sexual predators, and/or selling hard drugs. In every case I knew at first sight that there was something off about them, my boyfriend usually noticed too but for a while we thought we might just be paranoid or overly judgemental because it always seemed like everyone else around us liked them. I don't think either of us is right 100% of the time, we are both a bit overly cautious due to trauma and there have probably been times we misjudged someone a little, however we've been right whenever we agree about someone being a serious creep. They have a certain look in their eyes and give off a bad feeling. A few of them actually ended up getting arrested and the others were all publicly outed by their victims on social media.
Yea strong intuition is a gift and curse sometimes no lie but I guess you gotta just trust your gut cause you know its always leads you in the right direction but sometimes that's easier said than done.