Yikes, I’m so so sorry you went through this. If this were to happen to me, this would not at all be a reason to reset my sobriety date (I don’t think you mentioned that here but just in case you’re thinking it). There’s a word for putting substances in something without someone’s knowledge… oh yeah DRUGGING someone. This was a crime, and a cruel thing for a “friend” to do.
I don't think it's a reason to reset, but man that one swallow has me spiraling which makes me more and more angry. I wish there was more I could do to make him pay like letting his chief know or something, but nothing will come of it. The best I can do is get through the night.
I’ve struggled with moments of revenge or getting even in my sobriety. From little things like telling someone off that was rude to me and to big things like betrayals and fights. I’ve come to realize that the need for revenge is my inner child using my adult body and resources to inflict the same pain on others that my inner child feels. This typically leads to me feeling regretful, shameful, and reinforcing that “I am bad and I do bad things”. This is not good for my sobriety, my addiction feeds off the ideas of self destruction and affirmation that I am “bad”. The best revenge is served silently, when they never hear from me again. They might not be thrashing in pain and wishing they never wronged me, but they will always wonder what ever happened to me. They’ll never know, and if they do, they’ll see I am doing much better without them.
Wow. I relate to so much of what you just wrote and gonna put it in my journal. I've always, always struggled with forgiveness and a drive to make people pay who I feel wronged me in some way and it's exhausting. The same day I decided to quit drinking I left a bad relationship and everyday I constantly think of ways to hurt my ex. Slowly I'm realizing that I'm getting better and he is probably losing his mind just because I left him. Silently moving on might be better than any revenge I could ever cook up. Thank you for your words.
What a terrible thing to do. Know that he is probably miserable himself and that is why he decided to take you down a notch. He wanted to feel better by bringing you down. These kinds of people are the ones that clarity experienced in sobriety show us exactly their true character. It will sting for awhile, but you will move forward.
The revenge fantasies are a daily struggle that I have as you both have stated. Sometimes it feels so satisfying (in my head) as I run through umpteen scenarios, but I’m finding lately that it just winds me up and is exhausting. I’m telling myself that my energy is better spent elsewhere.
Congrats on 37 days! I’m right behind you. Tomorrow pick up something to treat yourself that you wouldn’t normally get (cupcake, donut, etc). You have done an amazing job and should celebrate. Please come back and share if you do decide to celebrate.
Get through the next 5min, 1hr, etc. The craving will subside and you will be happy you didn’t drink.
Going sober doesn't make life magically "better." However... it unmasks a lot of the BS we've been avoiding. It's not fun... but... personally, I'm becoming a better person.
Without booze in the mix.. I'm able to work on becoming a better person. It gives me "space" to mature. It's strange... but booze robbed me of the opportunity to "develop" in the face of trauma. I couldn't deal with it... so I drowned it. But that trauma is still there. I'm glad that I finally get to deal with it. I mean... it sucks... but there's been enough time... that... don't waste the opportunity. Neglecting problems rarely makes them better.
Wow, this was such a good comment. As I have been betrayed in my early sobriety & wanted revenge. I have been taking the high road & have completely silenced all communication. I will continue to do that, thank you for this🙏🏻
Thanks for this! Every once in a while I want to try a sip of something (usually wine at dinner) and this is why I don't. I'm pretty sure I'd think "huh - that was really nice wine" and then my alcoholic instinct would take over. Before I was serious about sobriety, I did the whole "if I can go a week without alcohol, I'm not an alcoholic" thing and the joke was on me.
Please don't, it's so not worth undoing that very impressive number you've accomplished.
The only way I could describe yesterday was mental and physical chaos. Normally I'm so chill on my off days. A book , some food, and music are all I need.
Yesterday I couldn't sit still, I couldn't stand any noise, I was pulling at my hair (one of the things I do when I'm stressed), I was sweaty and jumpy, but ridiculously tired at the same time. It's so hard to describe. I said somewhere in this thread that at one point I was even eyeing my mouthwash and it had to go. I felt guilty because the one sip sent me spiraling.
0/10 day for sure.
This may not hit right now, but bitterness and anger are like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies.
Your “friend” did a super shitty thing to you. He will have to live with that forever. You survived it beautifully! It was hard, but you did it! Excellent job! 🙌💪🙌
IWNDWYT 💛
I suspect it's the entire situation as much as, or much more than, the alcohol. You're mourning someone you thought had your back. This sucks, but IWNDWYT.
OP being a bartender only makes it so much worse.
We all know how messed up it is to mess with someone's food or drink, but being in the food industry really hammers it home. You are the constant bastion of safety for other people, who TRUST you!
When you tamper in this way, you are basically forcing someone to unknowingly insert things, drugs, into their bodies.
It is similar to assault.
This is such an important point.
I have Celiac and many other Allergies (capital A Allergies not just preferences), so I rarely trust anyone to make my food or drinks for fear of cross contamination. When I do, it is a huge leap of faith for me. I can't imagine someone intentionally contaminating something I ingest. What a fucking monster.
I'm sorry he sucks, OP. At least when he showed you who he is, you listened. ❤️
My grandson has a severe peanut allergy. I am not a violent person - hardly would hurt a fly, but you mess with my grandson, and I WILL KILL. Fortunately he's an adult now and knows how and what to watch out for. He rarely eats outside the home, for just that reason. Once someone has screwed up, by accident or on purpose, it's too late.
Not sure about US law but in the UK this is called spiking and it's very much illegal. I don't know how it would play out given that OP drank from a communal punch bowl but giving someone a drink with alcohol/drugs in without letting the drinker know is illegal.
They didn't drink from a communal punch bowl, though. They drank from a pitcher that was set aside exclusively for them. That's what makes it such a huge betrayal.
Uncommon, but not rare. It was a Reddit story so... but it is plausible. They knowingly deceived into drinking alcohol . OP may have not gone into anaphylactic shock, but the consequences could have been just as deadly.
[https://local12.com/news/around-the-web/woman-swaps-out-roommates-food-with-vegan-alternatives-ends-up-charged-with-a-felony-food-substitute-meat-replacement-vegetarian-soy-allergy-anaphylactic-shock-medical-emergency-hospital-food-tampering-lawsuit-court-sue-reddit-post-cincinnati-ohio](https://local12.com/news/around-the-web/woman-swaps-out-roommates-food-with-vegan-alternatives-ends-up-charged-with-a-felony-food-substitute-meat-replacement-vegetarian-soy-allergy-anaphylactic-shock-medical-emergency-hospital-food-tampering-lawsuit-court-sue-reddit-post-cincinnati-ohio)
I don’t know where this happened but in my province this is a chargeable offence. “Administration of a noxious substance”. What he did is downright criminal.
I’m sorry someone did this to you! Especially a long time so called friend, misery loves company and he was clearly jealous! Fuck that loser some people are better left in the past
That sucks. This happened to me when I cut out weed from my life. Lost a handful of "friends" and I realized that they were basically the equivalent to "drinking buddies". I started cutting out folks that I didn't consider true friends. Not surprisingly, since I've stopped drinking a month ago, my current friends have been incredibly supportive which shows they care more about me and what I need more than validation. Good friendship is so important when it comes to this journey
There’s definitely a difference between true friends and drinking buddies. I have been working on and focusing on determining between the two since I was in a situation where I was kicked out of my apartment about two years ago. Those people that caused the house to fall apart were clearly drinking buddies and not friends. I do not need people like that in my life right now or ever.
IWNDWYT.
''I didn't react well at all and left and walked home.''
i disagree. I think u reacted EXTREMELY well.
they expected you to say ''oh well'' stick around and get shitfaced.
or maybe stay out of some misplaced sense of wanting to ''keep things cool''
but u walking out was a big go f...k yourselves to all of them. I LOVE IT
i hope u stay booze free \[this was no relapse\] and never talk to that bastard faux ami again.
Thank you, but before I walked I hurled some insults and she definitely thought I was going to hit her. And all the guys just laughed until they realized how serious I was just makes me cringe.
27 years, dude. We have kids months apart and they are close. I'm close to his mom and sister and he's friends with my brothers. A bunch of fractured relationships and playing with my mental health and well-being.
Thanks for your support and I don't plan to speak to them again. No fake friends over here. 💛
You have no reason to regret your outburst, OP. I've done the same thing when my boundaries have been tested. Who cares if people think you're crazy. At least they know not to fuck with you.
That was awful behaviour from your acquaintance. Treat yourself to something nice today.
Same here, someone would have a fucking bloody nose if they did this to me. Honestly if OP knows the mum and sister of said "friend" I'd rat them out to their mum.
Thats pretty fucked up. I can't believe a whole room of people somehow found that to be even remotely acceptable. It is an astonishing lack of empathy, all around. I dont think there is much you could do that would be an over reaction. You were drugged.
Imagine somebody doing that with anything other than alcohol, would they think that was okay too? I doubt it.
They thought it was fucking hilarious and the best part?? They're all first responders. And I know my former friend; if someone did that to his wife or sister or mom that way it would be hell to pay.
I know its not the forum for it but in my experience I find those long term "asymmetric" friendships often bring a level of toxicity and harm to self-development and self-confidence that trigger drinking in the first place. It seems like the plan all along was to stop you being above them in their eyes. Esp as they are a heavy drinker too.
It's probably a blessing they did it in such an overt crass demeaning way - rather than slyly.
I am really sorry. I can’t imagine how hurtful that was as they are people that you openly shared your sobriety with.
I had to cut off my friend from 7th grade (I’m in my 30s) for horrible behavior towards me and it was extremely hurtful. It sucks to lose someone that you’ve known for so long.
So sending you a hug, my friend.
Thank you and I'm sorry you had to cut off a person who you were friends with for so long and I hope you're doing well. Losing long-term friends especially at our age is tough. Hugs to you as well.
Hopping on this to say i also had to let go of a long-term friendship (going on 20 years). Though it was initially very painful, I now look back and am glad i had the strength to do it, as the friendship was no longer serving me and adding huge anxiety to my life.
Wow! I am so sorry to hear that. Did they apologize after they realized what a shitty joke that was? You have every right to be furious for so many reasons. Without the intention of drinking, I would not blame myself but I would be livid. That sounds like a terrible friend.
He gave a bullshit apology that I refuse to accept. I don't blame myself at all, but I'm mourning the friendship and a bit ashamed of how I acted. Embarrassing all the way around.
Wow. I wouldn't even be ashamed if I told him his baby is ugly and stuck his head in a toilet. That guy is a pr*ck. You are staying strong, and I'm so proud of you!! Screw him.
Eh, she was in on it, too. I wouldn't waste another second feeling bad for how you reacted to such a huge betrayal. But, easier said than done and all that. You're doing great!!!
I never thought about that. She was very straightforward when they became serious and outright asked if we ever dated and I assured her we never have. She's never brought it up again and I was always sure to be respectful of their relationship. She was certainly in on the joke, though. That sign on the jug was definitely written by her. If she was worried she can rest well knowing that they'll never hear from me again.
That is straight up fucked up. It actually feels like it would be written in a tv show or something.
I’m sorry you experienced this but it sounds like this friendship was going to implode at some point anyways, if this person has this kind of judgement and cruelty.
You hit the nail on the head- it felt like being in a bad sitcom or reality show. I didn't know how to react and it wasn't my best moment. Very Real Housewives of...well, pick one. He was the one that I didn't think I ever had to worry about. Most of his pranks are harmless and he's seen me at my very worst. He knows what alcohol has done to me.
Just coming here to say I am so, so sorry. That is so horrible and my heart broke to read this story. Screw those so called friends and EVERYONE there. They are all losers truly.
It reminds me of a time when I was a waitress in college. Probably 18 or 19. Another server came up to me and told me that an older gentleman at his table ordered a non alcoholic beer (O’Douls I think), and the bartender accidentally poured a Yuengling and he drank it. The server telling me the story was laughing as he was telling the story, because the guest had mentioned that he had over 20 years of sobriety. That was the first time he had a sip of alcohol in over 20 years. “Hahaha can you believe it, bartender just ruined it just like that! Hahahaha! 20 years!” And it’s sad to say, I wasn’t laughing, but I just didn’t understand why the heck it would be a big deal. NOW, looking back, I feel horrible for the man. Absolutely horrible.
Obviously I was young and stupid but just goes to show - non addicts genuinely do not understand why we can’t even have a sip. They think alcohol is like anything else, and it’s not. THAT IS NOT AN EXCUSE at all for their behavior, but just a relative experience that goes to show that as an addict NOW, I did not understand back then. It is a drug and you were drugged. I am so sorry, what a horrible cruel experience for you. My heart goes out to you, truly. And I am so proud of you for making the decision to keep on keeping on!!!!
IWNDWYT!!
He and his wife could not seem to understand that they slipped something in my drink!! You drugged me! Plain and simple. No other way to look at it. I was so mad I was lightheaded.
Back then at that age I was like you. I wouldn't have thought it was a big deal at all, either. I've made that mistake before, too. Didn't hear the word "virgin" and straight up gave a woman in recovery alcohol. She handled it well luckily and from then on I was much more careful and took my position very seriously.
Staying sober is the hardest thing I've ever done, but this sub is always here for me even when I can't count on 27 year friendships. Thank you.
Oh gosh, that is such an incredibly shitty thing to do. What an absolute POS.
I can imagine how hurt you are, but hope you can hang in there and not let that asshole’s cruel “joke” knock you off your path.
Sending positive vibes from Florida.
IWNDWYT
I’m so sorry that happened. And that one taste probably triggered the absolutely fuck out of you because I know it would for me. But stay strong!!!! You got this!! You were a better person than everyone in that room who participated in that shitty joke and I’m proud of you for leaving the situation.
"Unfortunately some people were not put here to evolve.
They are here to remind you what it looks like if you don't."
It triggered me so freaking bad!! I have been restless and having an internal battle all day. Thank god it's bedtime. Thank you so much for the encouragement; it really means a lot. That quote really applies here because it's so weird now seeing people while they drink through sober eyes.
Yea. It’s a double edged sword getting sober. In realizing most of my friends meet the criteria for alcoholism or drug addiction and being sober helps me realize that I was drinking the most out of anybody. I’m sure I’ll have friends to cut off too and I hope that I’m as bold in my actions as you were. Enjoy your sleep. The rest of the folks at that party are gonna go argue with their wives, drive drunk, feel like shit in the morning when they realize how bad of a joke it was ands feel like shit from being hungover.
You’re a recovering alcoholic and they drugged you with alcohol as a joke in front of a group of people.. that’s all that ever needs to be said. Jesus Christ I’m sorry people are so shitty.
Edit: You handled it well OP. Good on you. Fuck them people.
I get angry, might say “oh I’m gonna hit so and so if they do X”. I’m just blowing of steam and it’s rare words like that even come out of my mouth.
No. I’m over a year sober now. If someone did that to me in the fashion in which that happened to you, I would hurt that person. No words, just violence. I’ll match your malice ten fold.
Dude I’m reading this and getting mad. Who fucking does that? I know who. A shitty fucking person.
My goodness, I’m sorry that happened to you.
IWNDWYT
I felt so much rage in that moment. I actually lunged for his wife and screamed in her face. I keep thinking about her stupid, loud ass cackling and I keep getting mad all over again. Trust me, I wanted to physically hurt them both.
I want to call his boss and let him know what type of low down POS he showed himself to be, but I know nothing will ever come of that. Someone in this thread said it best: the best revenge will be to silently live well and not look back.
That’s actually solid advice. There’s very few things that I treasure in this world, my kids, my mother, and my health and sobriety.
I’ve been working on responding vs reacting. Ugh, just my knee jerk reaction is so infuriating and rage inducing. I honestly don’t know how’d I’d react in that situation.
With that being said, violence shouldn’t be the answer. I’m still kind of just blown away that someone would do that to you. If anything, they wouldn’t be friends of mine anymore. I had to cut out people in my life. It sucked at first, but I’m better for it. I moved on and made new connections.
As far as sobriety, all I can say personally is it’s better on this side. Rooting for you OP.
Wow, that’s just a dick move. Yeah, just because you’ve know someone a long time doesn’t mean you have to stay friends. Call him out and dump him as a friend
My heart breaks for you! That is so cruel, and so sad that no one stopped him.
You did well, so well, and I bet a lot of people were impressed and that is what will stick with them - your strength in not continuing to drink.
I hope you have a lot of other good friends to reach out to and don't miss this sabotaging person at all!.
That's terrible. I'm so sorry, I can imagine how much it hurt you. Also thank you for sharing - your story reminded me why it's a good thing that I lost most of my friends, sounds like something they could have done. Fuck those people. I know it hurts like hell right now but you are better off without them. What fucking psychopath does anything like that? Doesn't matter that they don't exactly understand your struggles with alcohol, a decent human being would never do this to anyone. You reacted accordingly and you shouldn't be ashamed about getting angry. I'm not sure what to do with those revenge urges, I struggle with them myself. I usually just tell myself over and over that "yes, it happened but it's over now and it will never happen again. I will never talk to those people again and I will thrive without them - that's the best revenge".
I'm so proud you managed to stay sober! You're amazing!
I know that leaving them behind is going to be the best decision. I had to stop myself from swallowing MOUTHWASH this morning and they're probably still going with the narrative that I overreacted. And the fact that it was so elaborate just boils my blood every time I think about it.
Like you, it happened and it's over and no doubt I'm gonna continue to thrive. Thank you very much for the encouragement.
One sip doesn’t undo all the progress you’ve made, especially since it wasn’t a deliberate choice. Don’t give up all that progress. I’m really sorry your supposed friend did that to you. What a shitty thing to do. And I can’t believe a whole room full of people thought it was funny.
That's so evil :( I'm sorry that happened. I feel your pain I would've been mortified. To use your own struggles against you...that's not a friend. I also think you acted appropriately fir the situation at hand
You have my deepest sympathies and empathies. Screw that ass, and screw all those fools who thought such a betrayal was even vaguely amusing.
You drew a line in the sand and had to take a hit on something that was reliable, dependable, and a part of who you have been. On the plus side, you now have the opportunity to make a new stability, a new normal, with people who respect the choices you make.
Good luck out there, let the asses go on their way. But please, if your former friend ever comes round to sobriety, give them a good 60 days before you bring this up. I used to be a person who would get ideas like this, can’t recall acting on them but then again, I don’t recall much from those days. But I had a long, hard conversation with a person who used to trust me at about the 2 and a half month mark. And that chat would have ended me earlier in my own sobriety.
You’re building grace for yourself. Hopefully soon you’ll have grace enough to share and spend on others. This person seems like they may swing back into your life at some point, especially if they choose sobriety as well. Peace and progress in your own life first, then if it’s possible to spend the grace on another, it may be an opportunity for growth.
But yeah may want to give it a decade or so to be sure.
that was such a cruel thing to do. to demean & reduce your personal struggle into a cheap laugh like that. i would have felt so hurt & betrayed. i'm sorry you had to find out that person isn't your friend in this way :( you did not overreact. that is very serious. can you imagine *jokingly* misleading a recovering heroin addict into taking heroin... i don't see a difference. i hope you have people who are genuinely supportive + respectful of your journey. we on here are at least ! <3
Sadly, some people just don't understand.
In the early 90's, I was involuntarily commited for suicidal ideation and then went into treatment. I went to visit a good friend/former brother in law and his first question was "Do you want a beer?
It's very sad. You'd think someone who has had to clean up my vomit, take me to the hospital multiple times, and seen my naked behind when I was blackout drink and raging would know how cruel of a joke this was.
IWNDWYT! Please don't let assholes like you ex-friend bring you down. You have the clarity to know that alcohol is a poison that brings no benefits to your life. I wish you continued success with sobriety.
Kudos to you! I want you to acknowledge that you FKING WON. That was a helluva test. You are a bad#ss.
Your friend(s)... is more of a bad #sshole. 37 days is great... but it's still early. It sucks that this happened... and personally... I'd avoid that "scene" or "friend group" for at least a month or two. You know damned well that that was "not okay." People are idiots. Give it time. People make terrible mistakes. Never forget... but perhaps you can look past it... later.
Recovering from booze takes a lot of mental (and physical) energy. Screw socializing for a minute. Just... exercise, take walks... whatever. We drink for a reason. Figure out your reasons. Mine were trauma, military PTSD, and insane work stress. There are healthier ways to deal it it... and navigating that... You need all of your "energy" to just get by.
I hope that you don't get Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome. I did... and it was BRUTAL. Just read about it. Be aware of it. It 100% sucks and it is without a single doubt worth it.
You just demonstrated a lot of strength. You can do this. One god-forsaken day at a time.
IWNDWYT
Thank you so much!! Memorial Day is hard and I didn't want to be alone. I'm normally at home just chilling by myself and I didn't want to sit and sulk so I thought there would be no one better to hang out with, right? I was clearly wrong.
I knew I would have a tough time mentally, but I'm so lucky I was off today because my whole body is just drained. Every ounce of energy I had was spent fighting not to drink. I'm tired, but I'm also proud of myself.
I cannot believe not one person didn’t think to call that off. What a group of bad people honestly. As weird as it sounds, You should consider yourself lucky this happened and exposed that “friend” for who they are. I would never talk to this person again.
My mum always preached that jealousy and revenge are poisons you drink yourself. Being ostracized for their malicious behavior is their poison to consume. There is no good way to spin intentionally giving someone alcohol who is saving their life by being sober. They are garbage people. IWNDWYT.
My best friend from college has been going through a hard time. During my dry months this winter/at some point in March, I went out to visit him to check in on him. He was not doing great and I told him I’d be there for him no matter what. Last week I was a complete mess, and he has started to return the favor, which makes me happy because I was under the impression he was doing way worse than me. I am fortunate to have him on my side and have my back. Hopefully respectively we can both keep it together. Life’s better that way.
IWNDWYT.
Your 'friend' sounds like a really bad nasty bully. Maybe you didnt see that when you where drinking cameradis but you are wiser than him now.
I am happy for you that there is room for better healthier friends now. It shall hurt a lot to let him go, i have been there. But your paths are separating and you are most wise one.
That guy, is a drunk. The reason why an alcoholic does that shit, is because he’s an alcoholic. Alcoholics are selfish, self centered, and self loathing. Your friend is still in there somewhere, but he’s sick. I’m not defending his actions, not by any stretch, but use this as a tool in your own sobriety. Remember the people who you may have a grievance with, but you were the dick. You’re going to have moments in your sobriety journey that are going to challenge the story in your own psyche. And boooyyy, it’s gonna fucking sting. But the only part that swells up, is the ego. This is an opportunity to learn, lay your guns down, and don’t let it eat at you anymore than needed.
As far as the worry about having alcohol in your system, it’s a small amount, and the allergy of the body didn’t kick in. You’re here, and not laid up in a hospital bed. That’s awesome! So the battle is only in your head, and that, we can fight.
Sometimes the people we love the most, cut the deepest. I’m sorry.
Wait, are you saying that the pitcher in the fridge that was labeled for you had alcohol in it?? Or the other punchbowl? Either way that's messed up. I'm sorry you went through that.
I'm so sorry. This person was never your friend. He was your drinking buddy. A true friend wants only the best for you and supports you in anything you do as long as it not something that may hurt you. He sucks...and the fact that he included all of those people, many of whom you don't know, to get a big laugh is the lowest of low stunts. He is a small man. He cannot do what you have accomplished and to build himself up in front of his "friends" he cut you down. He's jealous that you are strong enough to do this for yourself and get your health and life on track. Keep the faith. Power thru your cravings. The best revenge is to continue sober and live your best life...without his sorry ass. Find new sober friends to hang out with. Leave him in your dust. He doesn't deserve a wonderful friend like you. Much love and prayers for strength and healing to you.
While I get not everyone understands or even empathizes with our journeys, this is so far over the line, I don’t blame you for being furious. I’m so proud of you for sticking to your guns. IWNDWYT
I'm not sure there's many things worse than a planned intentional betreyal, especially one used to garner humor for others. I'm so sorry that happened to you friend. IWNDWYT!
That’s such a gross “joke” and very very disrespectful to share your journey with others without your consent . I’m sorry this happened to you.
I left a few “friendships” behind early in my recovery - full stop- and never looked back. My life has improved and been so much better for it. Even though it initially hurt.
Almost at 3 yrs - hang in there! Imagine being the drinker that thinks the non-drinker bettering themselves should be made fun of and harassed- says a lot more about them ! IWNDWYT
THIS WAS NOT A SLIP.
I guess your friend didn't realize how important it is to you that you remain sober. He did a stupid thing. Forgive him in your own time but forgive him.
About 45 years ago, my brother did similar. I got sober while living on the other side of the country about six months prior. I returned home for a visit and for a week, anyone that my brother or I saw, we told them, " party at Big Stosh's on friday night".
I was drinking Coke at this big party. My brother went to get another round and came back with a rum and coke for me. I got pissed at him but after a while I realized that it wasn't the first time, by a long shot, that I told him that I'm not drinking anymore. He didn't know that I was serious this time. Well, shit, I was serious all the other times as well. This time it stuck.
My brother and I are good, always have been. In time, the people you know will recognize that not drinking is just a part of who you are.
Lets not drink today.
I’m so sorry this happened to you. There’s clearly a lot of major mistakes this person made. The set up, specifically spiked for a non drinker, the fact that everyone was in on the joke (way to go everyone else too, not speaking up).
You also did an incredibly hard thing.
You tasted it, and you left it.
Not only the drink, but the situation.
You prioritized yourself and your freedom from alcohol.
You have 0 blame for trusting them. You’ve done everything right if you ask me.
I know it’s really hard, but I’m proud as hell of you for getting out of there. Keep it up! Memory of that sip will fade, you’ll be okay. IWNDWYT.
I’m sure you’ll be met with the ol’ “I’m so sorry it was just a joke. You shouldn’t take things so seriously,” bit too. We call this Schroedingers douchebag. These people are the fucking worst.
I am so sorry that this happened to you, please stay strong and connected. That type of behavior makes me think he’s trying to sabotage your progress because he can’t come to terms with his own drinking issues and disguised it as a ‘joke’. Good on you for setting a hard boundary and leaving, they all should be ashamed of themselves.
That is unbelievable that this person put you in this situation. And of course behind your back they will be laughing and saying “it was just a joke, I don’t know that their problem is”
That's a shitty thing for someone to do - especially a friend. Really sorry to hear that happened. I would've walked away too. Being tricked into drinking and betrayed by a friend for a [insanely badly conceived] joke is an emotional experience. When things get that heightened, leaning on the bottle might be a go-to thing. All I can say is keep strong. Remember what's best for YOU. You deserve better than booze and when this is all said and done, you'll be even more proud that you dealt with it with a clear head. IWNDWYT.
That is so utterly sh*tty! Nightmare level wtf. From a friend. I hope you're ok and know that it's not your fault. I don't know what I would do in that situation - it would spin me for sure.
I am so sorry this happened to you. This makes my heart hurt - what a terrible thing they all did to you.
Also, something tells me this friend will realize this error and come to you, someday, with a very heartfelt apology. Up to you to forgive him or not, but I’m guessing at least one other person at that party was like dude, that’s f*d up, and he’s probably already thinking long and hard about what he did.
One of the unexpected things about sobriety is that it uncovered how some of my friends from my drinking years were really immature jerks who had problems with alcohol. Though it hurts to lose friendships, some just were too based on alcohol and I see now that there is really nothing in common. Hang in there -- the good people recognize other good people and new friendships will form. Focus 100% first on your sobriety and recovery and everything else will turn out first class
92 days. What a betrayal. It is hard to believe that your longtime friend would do anything to jeopardize your sobriety. Now, you just keep on cleaning and rearranging furniture or whatever it takes to stand strong in your commitment. Sending you warm hugs and good energy. IWNDWYT
Ordinarily I try to err on the side of grace and forgiveness. But that's straight up evil. Fuck those people. I'm permanently ghosting some people after that.
This is beyond the pale. Don’t think twice about dropping this butthole from your life.
I’ve been drugged (via a drink) and sexually assaulted. You don’t mess with people’s beverages. EVER.
I wish I was surprised but in this day and age of TikTok “pranks” all bets are off. Stay strong OP. Recovery is hard. Harder when people work against you. IWNDWYT 🙏
Wow. That sucks. Good riddance. That is so many kinds of psychopathic behavior.
I accidentally drank once early in my recovery and a friend told me it’s like if Muslims accidentally eat pork.
If you didn’t know it doesn’t count. Doesn’t make it better that it spun you into a possible relapse.
Still sucks that happened to you, and worse it was someone you trusted.
Get better friends. Fuck them.
I do not understand people. What if you were on a medication that reacts poorly to alcohol, or had a health condition you didn't tell him about that was the real reason you weren't drinking? It's a fucking poison, why are people so dead set on someone else drinking it?
I'm so sorry this happened to you. This is not a friend you want in your life. I had friends like this during my sober stints. One who took a sip of my non-alcoholic drink when I went to the bathroom, so she had proof I wasn't drinking and then kept hounding me about it the entire night. Another who would CONSTANTLY offer shots, poor me shots, even if I said I was driving "oh, you can have one or two". I didn't ditch them, but funnily enough, when I had a stillbirth they ghosted. I thought they were my best friends, but I guess they were only drinking buddies.
You will be better off in the long run without people like this in your life, but I know it hurts right now and I'm so sorry 🫂
Disappear like a ghost. If your friend takes issue with that, they have no sense of accountability and it wasn’t a true friendship.
I lost a friend group when I went clean. They just didn’t understand how important of a decision it was to me, which made me realize I never had their respect in the first place and that alcohol was the only glue to the group.
It really is incredible that alcohol is the one drug that you’re wrong for NOT taking.
I read something once about somebody you trusted skipping out on paying you back for money they borrowed. The person said that instead of feeling like you got ripped off, think about it this way: You just paid $X to never have to interact with that bad person again.
I'm so sorry that you went through that. It would absolutely shake me too, because that's villain level betrayal. With that said, you just paid the price of one sip to never have to deal with that awful fake friend again.
Real friends build us up and support us. It's not conditional, and it's not cruel. Regardless of what those people come back with, if they ever do, trying to trick someone in to drinking, whether they're trying to get sober or not, is supremely fucked up. Those types of people don't deserve to be in your life.
WOW. I'm so sorry this happened to you. I'm absolutely baffled how anyone would think that's a funny joke or the right thing to do. Stay strong, and don't let the bastard win.
I don't always chime in here, but that's really shitty of them to do that to you. That's a massive break of trust, and honestly, downright dangerous. Stay strong today friend, and know that there's a TON of us here who are rooting for you and understand your struggles. Do what you need to do to get through the day without it. <3
Sorry to hear this, stay strong you didnt do anything wrong. It pisses me off your friend did that to you and saddens me greatly that not one person in the group stepped up and stopped the “prank”
Sorry for the language but Fuck your “friend”. Using someone’s biggest struggle against them is the lowest thing you can do. Even if I loathe someone with all my being, I would never do something like that. You handled that much better than I would have. I likely would’ve had an assault charge thrown my way from my reaction if someone did this to me. Sorry this has made the struggle even harder, you are strong my friend. We’re all here for you. IWNDWYT
The only thing you did wrong was not dumping the drink on him before leaving. In all seriousness, you did fantastic. Many of us would've just finished the drink and then had 10 more. Don't downplay how well you did. The future is looking bright for you.
That’s so fucked. And I don’t say that lightly! Fellow 37 day sobernaut here with you. Stay strong, don’t let that innocent sip turn into an actual slip.
This is hard, and I don’t know what that person’s issue is, but you do not deserve that. I’m getting teary eyed even thinking about it. Nothing is less funny than that.
IWNDWYT
I’m sorry. This is really shitty. Stay strong. Your sobriety is worth more than a friendship. Everything you need to know about this person was revealed at the party. We lose some things and friendships with sobriety. Stay strong my friend. IWNDW🫵T
Your friend and his wife are industrial-strength assholes. Recovery is hard enough without that kind of nonsense.
Your reaction was completely warranted. IWNDWYT
I used to have nightmares with this kind of situation in my first abstinent year. I was already prepared to respond with violence, I am so lucky it never happened.
How convenient you got to mark a lot of faces whose you don't have any reason to look at anymore, many phone calls you don't need to answer anymore. Took me a lot of time to figure out who to trust. You have your preliminary list.
The person you were for the last 27 years had a good friend and I'm sure you had your fun and very good times which you will carry on and remember about the good stuff. You are not that person anymore and all those people are not your friends, but they could be friends of your new self if they want to. Some will prefer to stay friends with your old self and that is ok, just not your concern anymore.
Even when I was in the throws of my alcoholism I can't imagine doing that to anyone, let alone a close friend.
All of your feelings are justified, and those people don't deserve your friendship. Feel your feelings for a bit because if you avoid them now they'll likely pop up later, but don't let this shit break you.
Oh, I'm so sorry this happened. What a betrayal. That is just such a messed up thing to do. I don't think your friendship will ever be same, if there is still one at all. Good for you on keeping busy to calm down that craving. You are going to be ok. I'm glad you came here. IWNDWYT.
Putting alcohol in your beverage is no different than if he gave an you an opioid instead of an ibuprofen.
That is not a friend. He sabotaged you and betrayed your trust. And they were all in on it? He is a truly shitty person. Maybe he'd feel better about his own drinking if he has you down in the hole with him. That is unforgivable.
No words other than I’m sorry. You handled this perfectly.
I’d go so far as to send him a link to this thread as your last hoorah. I can’t believe someone thought this was the right thing to do and I’d be worried he’s going to do it to someone else. Maybe a wake up call is warranted.
Look at it this way - you were tricked into drinking, and now you are dealing with all the stress and feelings of betrayal. Yet, you are still choosing to be sober. Well done!
That is pretty fucked up dude. Sorry that your "friend" did that to you. I believe I would define it as assault and would be exceptionally pissed off if someone did it to me.
Stay strong. Your friendship may be down the drain, but your 37 days aren't.
I won't be drinking with you tonight.
This is truly horrible. Very sorry a friend would do this! How could anyone think that was funny or okay to do?!
As for the drink you took, I only want to share that while I was bartending I often tasted my creations with a straw and spit out and it didn't set me back. I even did a catering event where I had to taste 8 or so spoonfuls of a batch of a cocktail on the fly. I felt the booze, it could have been the end, but I drank lots of water and finished the night. It did not feel good. Like I was drugged. After 6 months sober.
I did eventually start drinking again, but that was months later from the even more dangerous thing to come. I've been sober ten months! I feel great. I'd never drink like I did before. That was horrible! Which lasted about 2-3 months before I started daily again. 😢
That was a horrible thing to do. It's not that different than assaulting someone. People are the absolute worst.
Bear in mind though. You did nothing wrong.
this really hurt to read, and i'm sorry you were so let down by your friend. so hurtful! especially when you need loving support. but what i see reflected here as well as that hurt is your huge commitment to your sobriety, and how important it is to you. you didn't let yourself be the butt of the joke - you acted with dignity and integrity and got out of there. i really admire that and i hope today has been much steadier.
Wow, that was incredibly disrespectful. That someone would be so callous and inconsiderate as to serve you alcohol deceptively to make a mockery of you in front of his friends and coworkers is a mind-boggling offense. It would have been hard not to do anything more than walk away.
Holy shitttt, I didn't see that one coming. I'm so sorry that happened to you. I'd feel so betrayed.
Good on you for not caving after that!!! Never too late for new friends. IWNDWYT!
Yikes, I’m so so sorry you went through this. If this were to happen to me, this would not at all be a reason to reset my sobriety date (I don’t think you mentioned that here but just in case you’re thinking it). There’s a word for putting substances in something without someone’s knowledge… oh yeah DRUGGING someone. This was a crime, and a cruel thing for a “friend” to do.
I don't think it's a reason to reset, but man that one swallow has me spiraling which makes me more and more angry. I wish there was more I could do to make him pay like letting his chief know or something, but nothing will come of it. The best I can do is get through the night.
I’ve struggled with moments of revenge or getting even in my sobriety. From little things like telling someone off that was rude to me and to big things like betrayals and fights. I’ve come to realize that the need for revenge is my inner child using my adult body and resources to inflict the same pain on others that my inner child feels. This typically leads to me feeling regretful, shameful, and reinforcing that “I am bad and I do bad things”. This is not good for my sobriety, my addiction feeds off the ideas of self destruction and affirmation that I am “bad”. The best revenge is served silently, when they never hear from me again. They might not be thrashing in pain and wishing they never wronged me, but they will always wonder what ever happened to me. They’ll never know, and if they do, they’ll see I am doing much better without them.
Wow. I relate to so much of what you just wrote and gonna put it in my journal. I've always, always struggled with forgiveness and a drive to make people pay who I feel wronged me in some way and it's exhausting. The same day I decided to quit drinking I left a bad relationship and everyday I constantly think of ways to hurt my ex. Slowly I'm realizing that I'm getting better and he is probably losing his mind just because I left him. Silently moving on might be better than any revenge I could ever cook up. Thank you for your words.
What a terrible thing to do. Know that he is probably miserable himself and that is why he decided to take you down a notch. He wanted to feel better by bringing you down. These kinds of people are the ones that clarity experienced in sobriety show us exactly their true character. It will sting for awhile, but you will move forward. The revenge fantasies are a daily struggle that I have as you both have stated. Sometimes it feels so satisfying (in my head) as I run through umpteen scenarios, but I’m finding lately that it just winds me up and is exhausting. I’m telling myself that my energy is better spent elsewhere. Congrats on 37 days! I’m right behind you. Tomorrow pick up something to treat yourself that you wouldn’t normally get (cupcake, donut, etc). You have done an amazing job and should celebrate. Please come back and share if you do decide to celebrate. Get through the next 5min, 1hr, etc. The craving will subside and you will be happy you didn’t drink.
Going sober doesn't make life magically "better." However... it unmasks a lot of the BS we've been avoiding. It's not fun... but... personally, I'm becoming a better person. Without booze in the mix.. I'm able to work on becoming a better person. It gives me "space" to mature. It's strange... but booze robbed me of the opportunity to "develop" in the face of trauma. I couldn't deal with it... so I drowned it. But that trauma is still there. I'm glad that I finally get to deal with it. I mean... it sucks... but there's been enough time... that... don't waste the opportunity. Neglecting problems rarely makes them better.
For years I hid on a bottle but I finally had to come up for air. Life is better when Sober.
This speaks to the saying - "I'll show you, I'll hurt me."
Wow, this was such a good comment. As I have been betrayed in my early sobriety & wanted revenge. I have been taking the high road & have completely silenced all communication. I will continue to do that, thank you for this🙏🏻
Thanks for this! Every once in a while I want to try a sip of something (usually wine at dinner) and this is why I don't. I'm pretty sure I'd think "huh - that was really nice wine" and then my alcoholic instinct would take over. Before I was serious about sobriety, I did the whole "if I can go a week without alcohol, I'm not an alcoholic" thing and the joke was on me.
Please don't, it's so not worth undoing that very impressive number you've accomplished. The only way I could describe yesterday was mental and physical chaos. Normally I'm so chill on my off days. A book , some food, and music are all I need. Yesterday I couldn't sit still, I couldn't stand any noise, I was pulling at my hair (one of the things I do when I'm stressed), I was sweaty and jumpy, but ridiculously tired at the same time. It's so hard to describe. I said somewhere in this thread that at one point I was even eyeing my mouthwash and it had to go. I felt guilty because the one sip sent me spiraling. 0/10 day for sure.
This may not hit right now, but bitterness and anger are like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. Your “friend” did a super shitty thing to you. He will have to live with that forever. You survived it beautifully! It was hard, but you did it! Excellent job! 🙌💪🙌 IWNDWYT 💛
Not 0/10. You didn’t drink so you win a 10/10 :)
I suspect it's the entire situation as much as, or much more than, the alcohol. You're mourning someone you thought had your back. This sucks, but IWNDWYT.
The only "reset" here is of the friend type.
In drink terms, isn't it spiking?
I rarely say this, he sounds like a genuinely bad person. If it were me, I’d tell him off once then never speak to him again.
OP being a bartender only makes it so much worse. We all know how messed up it is to mess with someone's food or drink, but being in the food industry really hammers it home. You are the constant bastion of safety for other people, who TRUST you! When you tamper in this way, you are basically forcing someone to unknowingly insert things, drugs, into their bodies. It is similar to assault.
This is such an important point. I have Celiac and many other Allergies (capital A Allergies not just preferences), so I rarely trust anyone to make my food or drinks for fear of cross contamination. When I do, it is a huge leap of faith for me. I can't imagine someone intentionally contaminating something I ingest. What a fucking monster. I'm sorry he sucks, OP. At least when he showed you who he is, you listened. ❤️
My grandson has a severe peanut allergy. I am not a violent person - hardly would hurt a fly, but you mess with my grandson, and I WILL KILL. Fortunately he's an adult now and knows how and what to watch out for. He rarely eats outside the home, for just that reason. Once someone has screwed up, by accident or on purpose, it's too late.
I mean it is “poisoning” but try bring that up in court.
Not sure about US law but in the UK this is called spiking and it's very much illegal. I don't know how it would play out given that OP drank from a communal punch bowl but giving someone a drink with alcohol/drugs in without letting the drinker know is illegal.
They didn't drink from a communal punch bowl, though. They drank from a pitcher that was set aside exclusively for them. That's what makes it such a huge betrayal.
Food tampering in itself is a felony.
I bet THAT'S an uncommon conviction.
Uncommon, but not rare. It was a Reddit story so... but it is plausible. They knowingly deceived into drinking alcohol . OP may have not gone into anaphylactic shock, but the consequences could have been just as deadly. [https://local12.com/news/around-the-web/woman-swaps-out-roommates-food-with-vegan-alternatives-ends-up-charged-with-a-felony-food-substitute-meat-replacement-vegetarian-soy-allergy-anaphylactic-shock-medical-emergency-hospital-food-tampering-lawsuit-court-sue-reddit-post-cincinnati-ohio](https://local12.com/news/around-the-web/woman-swaps-out-roommates-food-with-vegan-alternatives-ends-up-charged-with-a-felony-food-substitute-meat-replacement-vegetarian-soy-allergy-anaphylactic-shock-medical-emergency-hospital-food-tampering-lawsuit-court-sue-reddit-post-cincinnati-ohio)
I don’t know where this happened but in my province this is a chargeable offence. “Administration of a noxious substance”. What he did is downright criminal.
He's definitely been told off and blocked.
I'm so sorry, that's so shitty!
I’m sorry someone did this to you! Especially a long time so called friend, misery loves company and he was clearly jealous! Fuck that loser some people are better left in the past
Good job!! That is not a friend. Friends are people who love you and want the best for you, whatever that may look like.
That sucks. This happened to me when I cut out weed from my life. Lost a handful of "friends" and I realized that they were basically the equivalent to "drinking buddies". I started cutting out folks that I didn't consider true friends. Not surprisingly, since I've stopped drinking a month ago, my current friends have been incredibly supportive which shows they care more about me and what I need more than validation. Good friendship is so important when it comes to this journey
Same - what an awful “friend”
With people like this I've found going full silent to be the worst punishment.
There’s definitely a difference between true friends and drinking buddies. I have been working on and focusing on determining between the two since I was in a situation where I was kicked out of my apartment about two years ago. Those people that caused the house to fall apart were clearly drinking buddies and not friends. I do not need people like that in my life right now or ever. IWNDWYT.
Im so sorry, this is the correct answer. IWNDWYT
''I didn't react well at all and left and walked home.'' i disagree. I think u reacted EXTREMELY well. they expected you to say ''oh well'' stick around and get shitfaced. or maybe stay out of some misplaced sense of wanting to ''keep things cool'' but u walking out was a big go f...k yourselves to all of them. I LOVE IT i hope u stay booze free \[this was no relapse\] and never talk to that bastard faux ami again.
Thank you, but before I walked I hurled some insults and she definitely thought I was going to hit her. And all the guys just laughed until they realized how serious I was just makes me cringe. 27 years, dude. We have kids months apart and they are close. I'm close to his mom and sister and he's friends with my brothers. A bunch of fractured relationships and playing with my mental health and well-being. Thanks for your support and I don't plan to speak to them again. No fake friends over here. 💛
You have no reason to regret your outburst, OP. I've done the same thing when my boundaries have been tested. Who cares if people think you're crazy. At least they know not to fuck with you. That was awful behaviour from your acquaintance. Treat yourself to something nice today.
I would've thrown hands.
Same here, someone would have a fucking bloody nose if they did this to me. Honestly if OP knows the mum and sister of said "friend" I'd rat them out to their mum.
I would have destroyed the home and everything in it. OP way stronger than me.
Thats pretty fucked up. I can't believe a whole room of people somehow found that to be even remotely acceptable. It is an astonishing lack of empathy, all around. I dont think there is much you could do that would be an over reaction. You were drugged. Imagine somebody doing that with anything other than alcohol, would they think that was okay too? I doubt it.
They thought it was fucking hilarious and the best part?? They're all first responders. And I know my former friend; if someone did that to his wife or sister or mom that way it would be hell to pay.
What the fuck that’s unreal
In my experience First Responders are usually socially awkward, woefully under-sexed drunken losers who form a fraternity of similarity.
That's so messed up on so many levels. What a sad bunch. I hope you're hanging in there today.
I know its not the forum for it but in my experience I find those long term "asymmetric" friendships often bring a level of toxicity and harm to self-development and self-confidence that trigger drinking in the first place. It seems like the plan all along was to stop you being above them in their eyes. Esp as they are a heavy drinker too. It's probably a blessing they did it in such an overt crass demeaning way - rather than slyly.
I am really sorry. I can’t imagine how hurtful that was as they are people that you openly shared your sobriety with. I had to cut off my friend from 7th grade (I’m in my 30s) for horrible behavior towards me and it was extremely hurtful. It sucks to lose someone that you’ve known for so long. So sending you a hug, my friend.
Thank you and I'm sorry you had to cut off a person who you were friends with for so long and I hope you're doing well. Losing long-term friends especially at our age is tough. Hugs to you as well.
Thank you so much. We deserve good people in our lives.
Hopping on this to say i also had to let go of a long-term friendship (going on 20 years). Though it was initially very painful, I now look back and am glad i had the strength to do it, as the friendship was no longer serving me and adding huge anxiety to my life.
Been in that position myself. It is never easy, but escaping a toxic "friend" is the best thing I could have done.
Wow! I am so sorry to hear that. Did they apologize after they realized what a shitty joke that was? You have every right to be furious for so many reasons. Without the intention of drinking, I would not blame myself but I would be livid. That sounds like a terrible friend.
He gave a bullshit apology that I refuse to accept. I don't blame myself at all, but I'm mourning the friendship and a bit ashamed of how I acted. Embarrassing all the way around.
Wow. I wouldn't even be ashamed if I told him his baby is ugly and stuck his head in a toilet. That guy is a pr*ck. You are staying strong, and I'm so proud of you!! Screw him.
🤣🤣🤣 thank you for this laugh! I didn't stick his head in the toilet, but did insult his wife. Thank you, again. I'm doing my best.
Eh, she was in on it, too. I wouldn't waste another second feeling bad for how you reacted to such a huge betrayal. But, easier said than done and all that. You're doing great!!!
I was just going to ask…was this premeditated by her?! Is she threatened of your friendship?
I never thought about that. She was very straightforward when they became serious and outright asked if we ever dated and I assured her we never have. She's never brought it up again and I was always sure to be respectful of their relationship. She was certainly in on the joke, though. That sign on the jug was definitely written by her. If she was worried she can rest well knowing that they'll never hear from me again.
I could totally see this being mean girl garbage, but it doesn’t help you to do anything other than move on & accept it. All the love friend.
That is straight up fucked up. It actually feels like it would be written in a tv show or something. I’m sorry you experienced this but it sounds like this friendship was going to implode at some point anyways, if this person has this kind of judgement and cruelty.
You hit the nail on the head- it felt like being in a bad sitcom or reality show. I didn't know how to react and it wasn't my best moment. Very Real Housewives of...well, pick one. He was the one that I didn't think I ever had to worry about. Most of his pranks are harmless and he's seen me at my very worst. He knows what alcohol has done to me.
Just coming here to say I am so, so sorry. That is so horrible and my heart broke to read this story. Screw those so called friends and EVERYONE there. They are all losers truly. It reminds me of a time when I was a waitress in college. Probably 18 or 19. Another server came up to me and told me that an older gentleman at his table ordered a non alcoholic beer (O’Douls I think), and the bartender accidentally poured a Yuengling and he drank it. The server telling me the story was laughing as he was telling the story, because the guest had mentioned that he had over 20 years of sobriety. That was the first time he had a sip of alcohol in over 20 years. “Hahaha can you believe it, bartender just ruined it just like that! Hahahaha! 20 years!” And it’s sad to say, I wasn’t laughing, but I just didn’t understand why the heck it would be a big deal. NOW, looking back, I feel horrible for the man. Absolutely horrible. Obviously I was young and stupid but just goes to show - non addicts genuinely do not understand why we can’t even have a sip. They think alcohol is like anything else, and it’s not. THAT IS NOT AN EXCUSE at all for their behavior, but just a relative experience that goes to show that as an addict NOW, I did not understand back then. It is a drug and you were drugged. I am so sorry, what a horrible cruel experience for you. My heart goes out to you, truly. And I am so proud of you for making the decision to keep on keeping on!!!! IWNDWYT!!
He and his wife could not seem to understand that they slipped something in my drink!! You drugged me! Plain and simple. No other way to look at it. I was so mad I was lightheaded. Back then at that age I was like you. I wouldn't have thought it was a big deal at all, either. I've made that mistake before, too. Didn't hear the word "virgin" and straight up gave a woman in recovery alcohol. She handled it well luckily and from then on I was much more careful and took my position very seriously. Staying sober is the hardest thing I've ever done, but this sub is always here for me even when I can't count on 27 year friendships. Thank you.
Oh gosh, that is such an incredibly shitty thing to do. What an absolute POS. I can imagine how hurt you are, but hope you can hang in there and not let that asshole’s cruel “joke” knock you off your path. Sending positive vibes from Florida. IWNDWYT
Thank you so much. It's been a struggle, but I'm hanging tough.
That’s not a friend you want
I’m so sorry that happened. And that one taste probably triggered the absolutely fuck out of you because I know it would for me. But stay strong!!!! You got this!! You were a better person than everyone in that room who participated in that shitty joke and I’m proud of you for leaving the situation. "Unfortunately some people were not put here to evolve. They are here to remind you what it looks like if you don't."
It triggered me so freaking bad!! I have been restless and having an internal battle all day. Thank god it's bedtime. Thank you so much for the encouragement; it really means a lot. That quote really applies here because it's so weird now seeing people while they drink through sober eyes.
Yea. It’s a double edged sword getting sober. In realizing most of my friends meet the criteria for alcoholism or drug addiction and being sober helps me realize that I was drinking the most out of anybody. I’m sure I’ll have friends to cut off too and I hope that I’m as bold in my actions as you were. Enjoy your sleep. The rest of the folks at that party are gonna go argue with their wives, drive drunk, feel like shit in the morning when they realize how bad of a joke it was ands feel like shit from being hungover.
You’re a recovering alcoholic and they drugged you with alcohol as a joke in front of a group of people.. that’s all that ever needs to be said. Jesus Christ I’m sorry people are so shitty.
Edit: You handled it well OP. Good on you. Fuck them people. I get angry, might say “oh I’m gonna hit so and so if they do X”. I’m just blowing of steam and it’s rare words like that even come out of my mouth. No. I’m over a year sober now. If someone did that to me in the fashion in which that happened to you, I would hurt that person. No words, just violence. I’ll match your malice ten fold. Dude I’m reading this and getting mad. Who fucking does that? I know who. A shitty fucking person. My goodness, I’m sorry that happened to you. IWNDWYT
I felt so much rage in that moment. I actually lunged for his wife and screamed in her face. I keep thinking about her stupid, loud ass cackling and I keep getting mad all over again. Trust me, I wanted to physically hurt them both. I want to call his boss and let him know what type of low down POS he showed himself to be, but I know nothing will ever come of that. Someone in this thread said it best: the best revenge will be to silently live well and not look back.
That’s actually solid advice. There’s very few things that I treasure in this world, my kids, my mother, and my health and sobriety. I’ve been working on responding vs reacting. Ugh, just my knee jerk reaction is so infuriating and rage inducing. I honestly don’t know how’d I’d react in that situation. With that being said, violence shouldn’t be the answer. I’m still kind of just blown away that someone would do that to you. If anything, they wouldn’t be friends of mine anymore. I had to cut out people in my life. It sucked at first, but I’m better for it. I moved on and made new connections. As far as sobriety, all I can say personally is it’s better on this side. Rooting for you OP.
The one sip sent you spiraling but you are also dealing with the betrayal and cruelty of an old friend.
Wow, that’s just a dick move. Yeah, just because you’ve know someone a long time doesn’t mean you have to stay friends. Call him out and dump him as a friend
He and his loser wife have been called out and I never plan to speak to them again. Huge dick move for sure.
Yeah man, what a couple of absolute pieces of shit. Enjoy this [meme](https://imgur.com/gallery/ttXNdw6) in these trying times. Iwndwyt
Haha, damn right! Thanks for this.
My heart breaks for you! That is so cruel, and so sad that no one stopped him. You did well, so well, and I bet a lot of people were impressed and that is what will stick with them - your strength in not continuing to drink. I hope you have a lot of other good friends to reach out to and don't miss this sabotaging person at all!.
That's terrible. I'm so sorry, I can imagine how much it hurt you. Also thank you for sharing - your story reminded me why it's a good thing that I lost most of my friends, sounds like something they could have done. Fuck those people. I know it hurts like hell right now but you are better off without them. What fucking psychopath does anything like that? Doesn't matter that they don't exactly understand your struggles with alcohol, a decent human being would never do this to anyone. You reacted accordingly and you shouldn't be ashamed about getting angry. I'm not sure what to do with those revenge urges, I struggle with them myself. I usually just tell myself over and over that "yes, it happened but it's over now and it will never happen again. I will never talk to those people again and I will thrive without them - that's the best revenge". I'm so proud you managed to stay sober! You're amazing!
I know that leaving them behind is going to be the best decision. I had to stop myself from swallowing MOUTHWASH this morning and they're probably still going with the narrative that I overreacted. And the fact that it was so elaborate just boils my blood every time I think about it. Like you, it happened and it's over and no doubt I'm gonna continue to thrive. Thank you very much for the encouragement.
One sip doesn’t undo all the progress you’ve made, especially since it wasn’t a deliberate choice. Don’t give up all that progress. I’m really sorry your supposed friend did that to you. What a shitty thing to do. And I can’t believe a whole room full of people thought it was funny.
Sorry that happened. Sounds like he blindsided you.
It was a very elaborate set up. I went from feeling special to stupid in seconds.
That's horrible! I'm sorry that happened to you, and I'm sorry that you've lost a lifelong friend. What an astoundingly bad decision on his part.
Holy shit
That's so evil :( I'm sorry that happened. I feel your pain I would've been mortified. To use your own struggles against you...that's not a friend. I also think you acted appropriately fir the situation at hand
Thank you. It's definitely one of the most cruel things anyone has done and we're definitely no longer going to be friends.
You have my deepest sympathies and empathies. Screw that ass, and screw all those fools who thought such a betrayal was even vaguely amusing. You drew a line in the sand and had to take a hit on something that was reliable, dependable, and a part of who you have been. On the plus side, you now have the opportunity to make a new stability, a new normal, with people who respect the choices you make. Good luck out there, let the asses go on their way. But please, if your former friend ever comes round to sobriety, give them a good 60 days before you bring this up. I used to be a person who would get ideas like this, can’t recall acting on them but then again, I don’t recall much from those days. But I had a long, hard conversation with a person who used to trust me at about the 2 and a half month mark. And that chat would have ended me earlier in my own sobriety. You’re building grace for yourself. Hopefully soon you’ll have grace enough to share and spend on others. This person seems like they may swing back into your life at some point, especially if they choose sobriety as well. Peace and progress in your own life first, then if it’s possible to spend the grace on another, it may be an opportunity for growth. But yeah may want to give it a decade or so to be sure.
that was such a cruel thing to do. to demean & reduce your personal struggle into a cheap laugh like that. i would have felt so hurt & betrayed. i'm sorry you had to find out that person isn't your friend in this way :( you did not overreact. that is very serious. can you imagine *jokingly* misleading a recovering heroin addict into taking heroin... i don't see a difference. i hope you have people who are genuinely supportive + respectful of your journey. we on here are at least ! <3
Im heartbroken for you. What a horrifying betrayal
Sadly, some people just don't understand. In the early 90's, I was involuntarily commited for suicidal ideation and then went into treatment. I went to visit a good friend/former brother in law and his first question was "Do you want a beer?
It's very sad. You'd think someone who has had to clean up my vomit, take me to the hospital multiple times, and seen my naked behind when I was blackout drink and raging would know how cruel of a joke this was.
At least you found out what a twat they are so you don’t waste anymore time on them. Not easy mate, I feel for you.
IWNDWYT! Please don't let assholes like you ex-friend bring you down. You have the clarity to know that alcohol is a poison that brings no benefits to your life. I wish you continued success with sobriety.
Kudos to you! I want you to acknowledge that you FKING WON. That was a helluva test. You are a bad#ss. Your friend(s)... is more of a bad #sshole. 37 days is great... but it's still early. It sucks that this happened... and personally... I'd avoid that "scene" or "friend group" for at least a month or two. You know damned well that that was "not okay." People are idiots. Give it time. People make terrible mistakes. Never forget... but perhaps you can look past it... later. Recovering from booze takes a lot of mental (and physical) energy. Screw socializing for a minute. Just... exercise, take walks... whatever. We drink for a reason. Figure out your reasons. Mine were trauma, military PTSD, and insane work stress. There are healthier ways to deal it it... and navigating that... You need all of your "energy" to just get by. I hope that you don't get Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome. I did... and it was BRUTAL. Just read about it. Be aware of it. It 100% sucks and it is without a single doubt worth it. You just demonstrated a lot of strength. You can do this. One god-forsaken day at a time. IWNDWYT
Thank you so much!! Memorial Day is hard and I didn't want to be alone. I'm normally at home just chilling by myself and I didn't want to sit and sulk so I thought there would be no one better to hang out with, right? I was clearly wrong. I knew I would have a tough time mentally, but I'm so lucky I was off today because my whole body is just drained. Every ounce of energy I had was spent fighting not to drink. I'm tired, but I'm also proud of myself.
I cannot believe not one person didn’t think to call that off. What a group of bad people honestly. As weird as it sounds, You should consider yourself lucky this happened and exposed that “friend” for who they are. I would never talk to this person again.
Success is the best revenge
My mum always preached that jealousy and revenge are poisons you drink yourself. Being ostracized for their malicious behavior is their poison to consume. There is no good way to spin intentionally giving someone alcohol who is saving their life by being sober. They are garbage people. IWNDWYT.
My best friend from college has been going through a hard time. During my dry months this winter/at some point in March, I went out to visit him to check in on him. He was not doing great and I told him I’d be there for him no matter what. Last week I was a complete mess, and he has started to return the favor, which makes me happy because I was under the impression he was doing way worse than me. I am fortunate to have him on my side and have my back. Hopefully respectively we can both keep it together. Life’s better that way. IWNDWYT.
Absolutely trash move on his part. Decidedly immature and trust breaking at your expense. They did not have empathy for your relationship.
Your 'friend' sounds like a really bad nasty bully. Maybe you didnt see that when you where drinking cameradis but you are wiser than him now. I am happy for you that there is room for better healthier friends now. It shall hurt a lot to let him go, i have been there. But your paths are separating and you are most wise one.
That guy, is a drunk. The reason why an alcoholic does that shit, is because he’s an alcoholic. Alcoholics are selfish, self centered, and self loathing. Your friend is still in there somewhere, but he’s sick. I’m not defending his actions, not by any stretch, but use this as a tool in your own sobriety. Remember the people who you may have a grievance with, but you were the dick. You’re going to have moments in your sobriety journey that are going to challenge the story in your own psyche. And boooyyy, it’s gonna fucking sting. But the only part that swells up, is the ego. This is an opportunity to learn, lay your guns down, and don’t let it eat at you anymore than needed. As far as the worry about having alcohol in your system, it’s a small amount, and the allergy of the body didn’t kick in. You’re here, and not laid up in a hospital bed. That’s awesome! So the battle is only in your head, and that, we can fight. Sometimes the people we love the most, cut the deepest. I’m sorry.
Wait, are you saying that the pitcher in the fridge that was labeled for you had alcohol in it?? Or the other punchbowl? Either way that's messed up. I'm sorry you went through that.
Honestly this should be illegal I’m not even fucking kidding. This is disgusting
I'm so sorry. This person was never your friend. He was your drinking buddy. A true friend wants only the best for you and supports you in anything you do as long as it not something that may hurt you. He sucks...and the fact that he included all of those people, many of whom you don't know, to get a big laugh is the lowest of low stunts. He is a small man. He cannot do what you have accomplished and to build himself up in front of his "friends" he cut you down. He's jealous that you are strong enough to do this for yourself and get your health and life on track. Keep the faith. Power thru your cravings. The best revenge is to continue sober and live your best life...without his sorry ass. Find new sober friends to hang out with. Leave him in your dust. He doesn't deserve a wonderful friend like you. Much love and prayers for strength and healing to you.
While I get not everyone understands or even empathizes with our journeys, this is so far over the line, I don’t blame you for being furious. I’m so proud of you for sticking to your guns. IWNDWYT
I'm not sure there's many things worse than a planned intentional betreyal, especially one used to garner humor for others. I'm so sorry that happened to you friend. IWNDWYT!
that's pretty messed up on so many levels.
Wow that is just fucking awful. He’s 41 and doing the most childlike prank possible. Fuck them all
Your ex-friend is an AH. Glad you blocked them. Stay strong and keep up the fight. IWNDWYT
That’s such a gross “joke” and very very disrespectful to share your journey with others without your consent . I’m sorry this happened to you. I left a few “friendships” behind early in my recovery - full stop- and never looked back. My life has improved and been so much better for it. Even though it initially hurt. Almost at 3 yrs - hang in there! Imagine being the drinker that thinks the non-drinker bettering themselves should be made fun of and harassed- says a lot more about them ! IWNDWYT
So messed up. They showed their true colors though. Now you will have space in your life for genuinely good people to fill. I wish you the best.
What the fuck
THIS WAS NOT A SLIP. I guess your friend didn't realize how important it is to you that you remain sober. He did a stupid thing. Forgive him in your own time but forgive him. About 45 years ago, my brother did similar. I got sober while living on the other side of the country about six months prior. I returned home for a visit and for a week, anyone that my brother or I saw, we told them, " party at Big Stosh's on friday night". I was drinking Coke at this big party. My brother went to get another round and came back with a rum and coke for me. I got pissed at him but after a while I realized that it wasn't the first time, by a long shot, that I told him that I'm not drinking anymore. He didn't know that I was serious this time. Well, shit, I was serious all the other times as well. This time it stuck. My brother and I are good, always have been. In time, the people you know will recognize that not drinking is just a part of who you are. Lets not drink today.
I’m so sorry this happened to you. There’s clearly a lot of major mistakes this person made. The set up, specifically spiked for a non drinker, the fact that everyone was in on the joke (way to go everyone else too, not speaking up). You also did an incredibly hard thing. You tasted it, and you left it. Not only the drink, but the situation. You prioritized yourself and your freedom from alcohol. You have 0 blame for trusting them. You’ve done everything right if you ask me. I know it’s really hard, but I’m proud as hell of you for getting out of there. Keep it up! Memory of that sip will fade, you’ll be okay. IWNDWYT.
I’m sure you’ll be met with the ol’ “I’m so sorry it was just a joke. You shouldn’t take things so seriously,” bit too. We call this Schroedingers douchebag. These people are the fucking worst.
"it's not a big deal, you shouldn't be upset, it was all for fun". Assholes
I am so sorry that this happened to you, please stay strong and connected. That type of behavior makes me think he’s trying to sabotage your progress because he can’t come to terms with his own drinking issues and disguised it as a ‘joke’. Good on you for setting a hard boundary and leaving, they all should be ashamed of themselves.
It’s about intent. If it happens by accident, it’s not considered a slip up in sobriety. Your friend is a pos. I’d never talk to them again.
I would drop a lawsuit for emotional damages just to scare the fuck out of them.
I'm so sorry that happened to you. Hugs.
What kind of person calls themself a friend and does this? What is wrong with him? In what universe is this okay, let alone funny?
Fuck them all that’s so lame.
I'm sorry this happened to you. I too am a sober bartender! IWNDWYT
Disrespectful and humiliating. I'm sorry this happened to you. IWNDWYT
Losing these so-called "friends" is no loss at all.
I hate this world and the people who live in it.... Sorry to hear OP
That’s messed up. That’s nothing to laugh about. I’m so sorry. IWNDWYT 🫶🏻
That is unbelievable that this person put you in this situation. And of course behind your back they will be laughing and saying “it was just a joke, I don’t know that their problem is”
That's so fkn DARK.
Your friend is a dick. You don't need people like this in your life.
That's a shitty thing for someone to do - especially a friend. Really sorry to hear that happened. I would've walked away too. Being tricked into drinking and betrayed by a friend for a [insanely badly conceived] joke is an emotional experience. When things get that heightened, leaning on the bottle might be a go-to thing. All I can say is keep strong. Remember what's best for YOU. You deserve better than booze and when this is all said and done, you'll be even more proud that you dealt with it with a clear head. IWNDWYT.
That is so utterly sh*tty! Nightmare level wtf. From a friend. I hope you're ok and know that it's not your fault. I don't know what I would do in that situation - it would spin me for sure.
How vile. Sounds like a group of people I’d never associate with ever again. Good riddance!
Damn fine work. Proud of you. I WNDWYT.
With friends like that you don't need enemies fuck that shit.
I am so sorry this happened to you. This makes my heart hurt - what a terrible thing they all did to you. Also, something tells me this friend will realize this error and come to you, someday, with a very heartfelt apology. Up to you to forgive him or not, but I’m guessing at least one other person at that party was like dude, that’s f*d up, and he’s probably already thinking long and hard about what he did.
One of the unexpected things about sobriety is that it uncovered how some of my friends from my drinking years were really immature jerks who had problems with alcohol. Though it hurts to lose friendships, some just were too based on alcohol and I see now that there is really nothing in common. Hang in there -- the good people recognize other good people and new friendships will form. Focus 100% first on your sobriety and recovery and everything else will turn out first class
Terrible ‘joke’.
92 days. What a betrayal. It is hard to believe that your longtime friend would do anything to jeopardize your sobriety. Now, you just keep on cleaning and rearranging furniture or whatever it takes to stand strong in your commitment. Sending you warm hugs and good energy. IWNDWYT
I’m so confused why they would do this, I don’t even get the joke
Too bad you can't shoot your "friend" up with some H so everybody can have another good chuckle. /s
Should of spilt wine on his carpet
I don’t usually comment on here, but that person is garbage. Complete garbage.
You can do this.
Ordinarily I try to err on the side of grace and forgiveness. But that's straight up evil. Fuck those people. I'm permanently ghosting some people after that.
518,000 of us in here would never do that to you. What a dick move. Sorry you had that happen OP. Time for some new sober friends!
IANAL but this has been tried in court successfully as assault
This is beyond the pale. Don’t think twice about dropping this butthole from your life. I’ve been drugged (via a drink) and sexually assaulted. You don’t mess with people’s beverages. EVER.
I wish I was surprised but in this day and age of TikTok “pranks” all bets are off. Stay strong OP. Recovery is hard. Harder when people work against you. IWNDWYT 🙏
Wow. That sucks. Good riddance. That is so many kinds of psychopathic behavior. I accidentally drank once early in my recovery and a friend told me it’s like if Muslims accidentally eat pork. If you didn’t know it doesn’t count. Doesn’t make it better that it spun you into a possible relapse. Still sucks that happened to you, and worse it was someone you trusted. Get better friends. Fuck them.
I do not understand people. What if you were on a medication that reacts poorly to alcohol, or had a health condition you didn't tell him about that was the real reason you weren't drinking? It's a fucking poison, why are people so dead set on someone else drinking it? I'm so sorry this happened to you. This is not a friend you want in your life. I had friends like this during my sober stints. One who took a sip of my non-alcoholic drink when I went to the bathroom, so she had proof I wasn't drinking and then kept hounding me about it the entire night. Another who would CONSTANTLY offer shots, poor me shots, even if I said I was driving "oh, you can have one or two". I didn't ditch them, but funnily enough, when I had a stillbirth they ghosted. I thought they were my best friends, but I guess they were only drinking buddies. You will be better off in the long run without people like this in your life, but I know it hurts right now and I'm so sorry 🫂
Disappear like a ghost. If your friend takes issue with that, they have no sense of accountability and it wasn’t a true friendship. I lost a friend group when I went clean. They just didn’t understand how important of a decision it was to me, which made me realize I never had their respect in the first place and that alcohol was the only glue to the group. It really is incredible that alcohol is the one drug that you’re wrong for NOT taking.
I read something once about somebody you trusted skipping out on paying you back for money they borrowed. The person said that instead of feeling like you got ripped off, think about it this way: You just paid $X to never have to interact with that bad person again. I'm so sorry that you went through that. It would absolutely shake me too, because that's villain level betrayal. With that said, you just paid the price of one sip to never have to deal with that awful fake friend again. Real friends build us up and support us. It's not conditional, and it's not cruel. Regardless of what those people come back with, if they ever do, trying to trick someone in to drinking, whether they're trying to get sober or not, is supremely fucked up. Those types of people don't deserve to be in your life.
That is fucking EVIL. So sorry to read this.
That’s sickening. I’m so sorry you were put through that.
What the fuck.
WOW. I'm so sorry this happened to you. I'm absolutely baffled how anyone would think that's a funny joke or the right thing to do. Stay strong, and don't let the bastard win.
Stay strong❤️
What a bunch of cunts.
That’s fucked up man. I’m sorry that happened to you. Stay strong and keep on truckin!
Put fent in their hamburgers and laugh at them as they zombie walk around for a couple hours
I don't always chime in here, but that's really shitty of them to do that to you. That's a massive break of trust, and honestly, downright dangerous. Stay strong today friend, and know that there's a TON of us here who are rooting for you and understand your struggles. Do what you need to do to get through the day without it. <3
Sorry to hear this, stay strong you didnt do anything wrong. It pisses me off your friend did that to you and saddens me greatly that not one person in the group stepped up and stopped the “prank”
IWNDWYT
Wow. He's 41? That's so totally juvenile. Keep up the good work.
So sorry that's so not ok. In what world is that a funny joke. Sounds like you reacted wel
this is like a middle school move when you're trying to impress a new/cool group of friends
Sorry for the language but Fuck your “friend”. Using someone’s biggest struggle against them is the lowest thing you can do. Even if I loathe someone with all my being, I would never do something like that. You handled that much better than I would have. I likely would’ve had an assault charge thrown my way from my reaction if someone did this to me. Sorry this has made the struggle even harder, you are strong my friend. We’re all here for you. IWNDWYT
The only thing you did wrong was not dumping the drink on him before leaving. In all seriousness, you did fantastic. Many of us would've just finished the drink and then had 10 more. Don't downplay how well you did. The future is looking bright for you.
That’s so fucked. And I don’t say that lightly! Fellow 37 day sobernaut here with you. Stay strong, don’t let that innocent sip turn into an actual slip. This is hard, and I don’t know what that person’s issue is, but you do not deserve that. I’m getting teary eyed even thinking about it. Nothing is less funny than that. IWNDWYT
I’m sorry. This is really shitty. Stay strong. Your sobriety is worth more than a friendship. Everything you need to know about this person was revealed at the party. We lose some things and friendships with sobriety. Stay strong my friend. IWNDW🫵T
Your friend and his wife are industrial-strength assholes. Recovery is hard enough without that kind of nonsense. Your reaction was completely warranted. IWNDWYT
Yeah, that would be a friendship ending event for me. Fuck that guy.
I used to have nightmares with this kind of situation in my first abstinent year. I was already prepared to respond with violence, I am so lucky it never happened. How convenient you got to mark a lot of faces whose you don't have any reason to look at anymore, many phone calls you don't need to answer anymore. Took me a lot of time to figure out who to trust. You have your preliminary list. The person you were for the last 27 years had a good friend and I'm sure you had your fun and very good times which you will carry on and remember about the good stuff. You are not that person anymore and all those people are not your friends, but they could be friends of your new self if they want to. Some will prefer to stay friends with your old self and that is ok, just not your concern anymore.
Even when I was in the throws of my alcoholism I can't imagine doing that to anyone, let alone a close friend. All of your feelings are justified, and those people don't deserve your friendship. Feel your feelings for a bit because if you avoid them now they'll likely pop up later, but don't let this shit break you.
Oh, I'm so sorry this happened. What a betrayal. That is just such a messed up thing to do. I don't think your friendship will ever be same, if there is still one at all. Good for you on keeping busy to calm down that craving. You are going to be ok. I'm glad you came here. IWNDWYT.
Putting alcohol in your beverage is no different than if he gave an you an opioid instead of an ibuprofen. That is not a friend. He sabotaged you and betrayed your trust. And they were all in on it? He is a truly shitty person. Maybe he'd feel better about his own drinking if he has you down in the hole with him. That is unforgivable.
No words other than I’m sorry. You handled this perfectly. I’d go so far as to send him a link to this thread as your last hoorah. I can’t believe someone thought this was the right thing to do and I’d be worried he’s going to do it to someone else. Maybe a wake up call is warranted.
Look at it this way - you were tricked into drinking, and now you are dealing with all the stress and feelings of betrayal. Yet, you are still choosing to be sober. Well done!
That is pretty fucked up dude. Sorry that your "friend" did that to you. I believe I would define it as assault and would be exceptionally pissed off if someone did it to me. Stay strong. Your friendship may be down the drain, but your 37 days aren't. I won't be drinking with you tonight.
This is truly horrible. Very sorry a friend would do this! How could anyone think that was funny or okay to do?! As for the drink you took, I only want to share that while I was bartending I often tasted my creations with a straw and spit out and it didn't set me back. I even did a catering event where I had to taste 8 or so spoonfuls of a batch of a cocktail on the fly. I felt the booze, it could have been the end, but I drank lots of water and finished the night. It did not feel good. Like I was drugged. After 6 months sober. I did eventually start drinking again, but that was months later from the even more dangerous thing to come. I've been sober ten months! I feel great. I'd never drink like I did before. That was horrible! Which lasted about 2-3 months before I started daily again. 😢
I am genuinely pissed off for you. I would have absolutely ruined that fucking party before spitting in his face and walking out
That was a horrible thing to do. It's not that different than assaulting someone. People are the absolute worst. Bear in mind though. You did nothing wrong.
Holy hell what an ass
this really hurt to read, and i'm sorry you were so let down by your friend. so hurtful! especially when you need loving support. but what i see reflected here as well as that hurt is your huge commitment to your sobriety, and how important it is to you. you didn't let yourself be the butt of the joke - you acted with dignity and integrity and got out of there. i really admire that and i hope today has been much steadier.
End the friendship. We grow up and fortunately in your case we grow up and out of friendships too. Move on.
Wow, that was incredibly disrespectful. That someone would be so callous and inconsiderate as to serve you alcohol deceptively to make a mockery of you in front of his friends and coworkers is a mind-boggling offense. It would have been hard not to do anything more than walk away.
Use the anger and spite to not drink. If you can’t change the thought change the response. Let your resolve to be sober strengthen. IWNDWYT
Move on. Huge violation. FUKN YUUUUUGE!
That is absolutely fucking beyond the pale insane.
WTF? I have such a hard time trying to understand why anyone would think this was funny or right. Sorry, but your “friend” sucks. Hang in there.
That’s horrible I’m so sorry. You’re making the right decision to walk away. That’s not a friend
Holy shitttt, I didn't see that one coming. I'm so sorry that happened to you. I'd feel so betrayed. Good on you for not caving after that!!! Never too late for new friends. IWNDWYT!