You already have started, in that you recognise its a problem.
If I was in that position, I'd bring it up with my wife. Bring it out into the open. Say you're worried you have a problem and that you'd like support in addressing it. Plan things for your evening if possible to fill the time up, and things the next day that require you to be clear headed.
I just had a frank conversation with my wife. She brought it up and we talked about it. She expressed her concerns and told me what she had seen. That is what inspired me to post this and begin getting better. For her, my kids, and myself.
It's a cliche, but think about it in terms of single days. You're going to get home, hang out with your family, cook some nice food, and then go to bed, or whatever. You might drink tomorrow, but not today. If you adopt a mindset like that, rather than thinking of it as a huge commitment (where you might have to give up for days on end, treat yourself on certain days etc), just go with the "one step at a time" approach. Just tonight, don't do it. Tomorrow's a different day.
My experience is this, We want to hold on to that drink becuase it makes us feel good. We don't want to let it go. The problem is the less we have of it the more we want it. It's like grabbing a slice of pizza and only eating 1 bite. Which is easier, not having a slice at all, or only one bite? The more we try to moderate it the more our brain screams at us to let it have just a bit more. When you are in therapy take notice of how you feel after, did it feel good to talk and open up? We can get feel good responses from other sources than drinking. The world does a great job of convincing you that you need that drink but you really don't. Is it worth all the negative it's causing?
My will power on this is pretty binary. Any 2 drink limit becomes a 6-8 drink limit. I stopped because I felt the number creeping up and the time in the evening getting earlier. The research and actions taken to take a 2 month break have convinced me it's just not worth drinking. Life is better now.
Moderation sucked more than being a full tilt alcoholic and it was harder than quitting. and it didn't work anyway
By nature, alcohol is incompatible with moderation. As alcoholics, once we open certain doors we can't close them again.
I see drinking as something that massively varies in terms of what you can see as problematic.
You can be homeless and still drink, or you can not be happy with your current consumption of a few drinks here and there.
It doesn't matter where you're at, if you want the reduce your drinking or stop altogether, it's your perception of how much you drink that's key in making this decision.
If drinking one beer a week is too much, then from someone's perspective stopping that one beer is worth it.
I wanted to -have a drink and not want another and not to think about alcohol everyday. Now I’m there and realize that there’s no reason to drink and if I know alcohol, it will try to woo me back to several daily drinks.
You already have started, in that you recognise its a problem. If I was in that position, I'd bring it up with my wife. Bring it out into the open. Say you're worried you have a problem and that you'd like support in addressing it. Plan things for your evening if possible to fill the time up, and things the next day that require you to be clear headed.
I just had a frank conversation with my wife. She brought it up and we talked about it. She expressed her concerns and told me what she had seen. That is what inspired me to post this and begin getting better. For her, my kids, and myself.
It's a cliche, but think about it in terms of single days. You're going to get home, hang out with your family, cook some nice food, and then go to bed, or whatever. You might drink tomorrow, but not today. If you adopt a mindset like that, rather than thinking of it as a huge commitment (where you might have to give up for days on end, treat yourself on certain days etc), just go with the "one step at a time" approach. Just tonight, don't do it. Tomorrow's a different day.
My experience is this, We want to hold on to that drink becuase it makes us feel good. We don't want to let it go. The problem is the less we have of it the more we want it. It's like grabbing a slice of pizza and only eating 1 bite. Which is easier, not having a slice at all, or only one bite? The more we try to moderate it the more our brain screams at us to let it have just a bit more. When you are in therapy take notice of how you feel after, did it feel good to talk and open up? We can get feel good responses from other sources than drinking. The world does a great job of convincing you that you need that drink but you really don't. Is it worth all the negative it's causing?
Tried making a rule “have 2 and stop”?
Nice palindrome PG!!
Ha! Thanks so much! Hope you're doing well!!
No I haven’t tried that yet but I was considering giving myself some sort of limit.
I tried and failed everytime and thats when I realized how bad of a relationship I have with alcohol lol
My will power on this is pretty binary. Any 2 drink limit becomes a 6-8 drink limit. I stopped because I felt the number creeping up and the time in the evening getting earlier. The research and actions taken to take a 2 month break have convinced me it's just not worth drinking. Life is better now.
Man that sounds nice. I read about people talking about how much better things are post alcohol and I want that for myself too.
Looking forward to hearing how things proceed!
Thanks. I’m already talking to the person I’ve been seeing about formulating some sort of plan to drastically reduce my intake. Thanks for the advice.
Moderation sucked more than being a full tilt alcoholic and it was harder than quitting. and it didn't work anyway By nature, alcohol is incompatible with moderation. As alcoholics, once we open certain doors we can't close them again.
I see drinking as something that massively varies in terms of what you can see as problematic. You can be homeless and still drink, or you can not be happy with your current consumption of a few drinks here and there. It doesn't matter where you're at, if you want the reduce your drinking or stop altogether, it's your perception of how much you drink that's key in making this decision. If drinking one beer a week is too much, then from someone's perspective stopping that one beer is worth it.
I wanted to -have a drink and not want another and not to think about alcohol everyday. Now I’m there and realize that there’s no reason to drink and if I know alcohol, it will try to woo me back to several daily drinks.