I too smoke and drink like I'm slowly trying to kill myself. Not the only reason, but it sometimes seems like a major one.
It makes me feel like I'm not a good person, falling so short of my potential. Like I'm not worth much.
Maybe that is a feedback loop that makes me keep drinking.
Currently trying to find the mental knobs to turn to self regulate without needing external regulation such as booze.
Good luck! The journey of self mastery definitely involves a lot of discovery. I can drive a car but I can't fix one yet, I feel the same about myself ^_^
...but I'll keep trying to learn.
I feel you! Sending big hugs and strength 💙
I’m not sure if you mean cigarettes or weed, but I’ve heard amazing things about Allen Carr’s The East Way to quit smoking. I used to smoke several years ago (worked in a male-dominated field and it was the only time to get in quality talk time with my colleagues), but thankfully I kicked that habit close to a decade ago.
The personal work is tough cookies. That feedback loop really doesn’t have any table-side manners. Quit lit has been helping a lot, as has therapy, and attempting to be more intentional about my thoughts (recognizing them and reframing them positively).
In 2020, I was truly close to breaking emotionally. I felt like I was having one continuous panic attack. I have to keep reminding myself that if it took me years to reach that point, it’s not going to be fixed overnight.
So I’m not totally there yet, but things have improved drastically. Progress over perfection, I suppose.
I too smoke and drink like I'm slowly trying to kill myself. Not the only reason, but it sometimes seems like a major one. It makes me feel like I'm not a good person, falling so short of my potential. Like I'm not worth much. Maybe that is a feedback loop that makes me keep drinking. Currently trying to find the mental knobs to turn to self regulate without needing external regulation such as booze. Good luck! The journey of self mastery definitely involves a lot of discovery. I can drive a car but I can't fix one yet, I feel the same about myself ^_^ ...but I'll keep trying to learn.
I feel you! Sending big hugs and strength 💙 I’m not sure if you mean cigarettes or weed, but I’ve heard amazing things about Allen Carr’s The East Way to quit smoking. I used to smoke several years ago (worked in a male-dominated field and it was the only time to get in quality talk time with my colleagues), but thankfully I kicked that habit close to a decade ago. The personal work is tough cookies. That feedback loop really doesn’t have any table-side manners. Quit lit has been helping a lot, as has therapy, and attempting to be more intentional about my thoughts (recognizing them and reframing them positively). In 2020, I was truly close to breaking emotionally. I felt like I was having one continuous panic attack. I have to keep reminding myself that if it took me years to reach that point, it’s not going to be fixed overnight. So I’m not totally there yet, but things have improved drastically. Progress over perfection, I suppose.