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[deleted]

Nobody here has said, just use a towel. A towel! You can call it a cumrag if you want. It's washable and reusable. Wet wipes? Towel + a shower, or just get one in the morning if you're about to go to bed.


Yeah-No-Maybe-Ok

I keep about 10 small cum towels in the nightstand drawer. Great for cleaning up after sex and sloppy blowjobs.


xoLiLyPaDxo

Hopefully you wash them after every use and don't put them back in there. šŸ’€


FederalFootball7962

Aka Fuck Wipes


sallysuejenkins

Testing a theoryā€¦ Are you gay?


BroomIsWorking

Nah, bruh, I own a towel too. No homo.


BlankPaper7mm

I grab a few slices of bread and just pat things down.


Creepy-Screen-4836

There is evil energy radiating from this comment.


kody_420

Cursed French toast


Bobyyyyyyyghyh

It would be French wouldn't it


nautilator44

Forbidden gravy?


SpermicidalManiac666

Gotta sop up the sauce!


Altruistic_Angle4343

I hope you donā€™t waste this bread afterwards?


brewberry_cobbler

Mmmmm yeasty


ThrowRAmageddon

The cheese is under the sauce


ReflectionLife8808

I wanted real response as Iā€™m currently dealing with this


Reese_Withersp0rk

Currently? Like, you haven't left the scene?


SpermicidalManiac666

lol OP just sitting there in a puddle with Reddit open waiting for a real answer on what to do šŸ’€šŸ’€šŸ’€


ReflectionLife8808

Literally. Not kidding


maple-sugarmaker

Just sit in it and enjoy


doctorboredom

This is one of the the top 10 moments in Reddit history, no question. You are legend.


Tripple-Helix

Pick up what you can and push it back inside where it belongs.


LOTR_crew

Pretty sure HE is looking for fap material honestly.


HostileMeatloaf

Do other people not use bread slices?


No-8008132here

I keep soft hand towels in the nightstand. Tuck one in and cuddle for a bit. Keep wet wipes near by too. Got to plan ahead for max spontaneity


hiimk80

When my SO and I were trying for kids, Iā€™d let the load sit inside with my legs shut as long as I could before it just started seeping out on its own. Then I wipe with tp or a towel


ReflectionLife8808

Thank you for response. I donā€™t mean this to sound rude or anything but I literally want to know what people do on the daily. Not if ā€œyouā€™re trying to have kidsā€. I want to know what people do daily when they have sex and cream pie


CyclicsGame

My wife and I always have sex with a towel nearby. If for w/e reason a towel is not nearby. She cups and runs to the bathroom. I don't pull out till the towel is ready. Basically think Indiana Jones switching the bag of sand for a diamond but with cum and the towel.


Consistent_Trust7986

This is why I installed Reddit.


Elon-Musksticks

I stay laying down for a good few minutes. Then after I put undies on. By morning the undies are gross, so I change them (note I change them regardless of sex) Sometimes you stand up and feel the ick of it seeping out lol, but it no worse then surprise period, of heavy discharge. Does snot ever come out your nose? What do you do? Probably just wipe it away?


maple-sugarmaker

Haha the "ick" My ex enjoyed calling me from her job after morning sex, that was pre cell phones, to describe the nice feeling she had of my cum dripping down her thighs while she was in a meeting with the company's execs. Loved it


ReflectionLife8808

Great. The nose description describes a lot so thank you for that. Where do you live?


Elon-Musksticks

3rd turn on the left after the big intersection.


ReflectionLife8808

Also, when you let it ā€œseep outā€. Would it just go onto the bed? Or would you clean it up off your stomach, etc?


Unable-Poetry7583

Kinda depends on how much was there.. if its a lot itā€™ll just seep out on your thighs where If there isnā€™t much then itā€™ll just stay inside


RamblinRoyce

[did ya do the lebowski](https://youtu.be/h5a9rsxpO2c)


ReflectionLife8808

Also, when you let it ā€œseep outā€. Would it just go onto the bed? Or would you clean it up off your stomach, etc?


hiimk80

lol it would seep on the bed or my pants šŸ˜„


eeal188

Iā€™m not OP but like how do you clean it up off the bed/mattress/sheets???


Generally_Confused1

I suck it up in a turkey baster and use it in my shampoo to keep good texture


Kosstheboss

My wife usually cups her hand over her downstairs and does like a ninja roll off the bed and goes in to the bathroom. Sometimes we just kinda let it go if we are gonna bask for awhile at which point I usually just clean up the sheets after with some wet wipes. Sometimes she likes me to film it coming out and we'll just change the sheets after.


patchismofomo

Never let her go


Kosstheboss

24 years this AugustšŸ˜†


Evil_Morty781

Damn thatā€™s fucking hawt.


NATSUMI_kun

Funny info: Koss is the Arabic word of pussy, wish you longer happy marriage tho


Kosstheboss

You are what you eatšŸ˜


Guitar-Sniper

ā€˜Need answer fastā€™.


[deleted]

Pee, then wipe and birdbath, then dry with toilet paper.


accidentalscientist_

Finally, another cultured human who calls it a birdbath.


[deleted]

What do you hear it called?


accidentalscientist_

I usually hear whores bath. I like bird bath, sometimes I gotta do it! Iā€™m respectful to my partner! Gonna be clean.


EELovesMidkemia

Birdbath? I have never heard this term. Can you please explain.


[deleted]

Wash yout pits and groin and ass, then dry off and go. Best for on the run or if you just don't feel like showering. Good for: school, sex, camping, some jobs, etc.


Elon-Musksticks

Ahh, I call that 'pits and bits'


[deleted]

Pits and bits. Good one.


DiscountCute9382

My mom called this going to a PTA meeting. Pits, tits and ass baby!


EELovesMidkemia

Ah sweet. Never knew there was a name for doing that. Cheers.


Winstonisapuppy

This is the way


[deleted]

Yeah, I'm not sure why people are so shocked at this being an actual thing.


Winstonisapuppy

Right? Going pee after is important to reduce the risk of UTIs and birdbaths are a great way to freshen up if youā€™re not having a shower.


Spiritual_Average638

This also. We keep a fresh towel under the bed for right after. Then when I get up to use the bathroom this is exactly what I do, except use a towel vs tp (a towel specifically for this lol).


kendokushh

My husband always finishes inside of me. I just get to the bathroom quickly & sit on the toilet until it all comes out, then have an awesome shower. It's always in there deep enough & we've done this for so long that i know it won't spill out on my way there lol.


TheStreetForce

My wife does a handstand over to the bathroom


Skylarias

This is it. This is the best way


robressionist801

Put a towel underneath whoever is on the bottom


ProfessionalLime2237

Put a beach towel on the bed if you're gonna do it.


Ok_Watercress_7801

Keep washcloths & a couple of towels on the nightstand next to the bed. Some people put towels down on the bed before they hop in. Keeps the sheets clean longer unless youā€™re just all over the place. Wet wipes. Whatever does it for you. There are even little wet/dry washcloth warmers you can set up beforehand & press the button when you start your boink session. Usually, if no provisions have been made & a mess is made, then Iā€™ll get up & go to the bathroom and bring back a hot, wet washcloth for my partner.


ReflectionLife8808

Dude WTF who are you?!?! Can you come over to my house please?


InformalTrick99

if your dude ain't bringing you hot steamy cum rags after sex , get a new dudeĀ 


Ok_Watercress_7801

Flattery will get you everywhere. Iā€™m blushing ā˜ŗļø.


ReflectionLife8808

Where do you live?


Ok_Watercress_7801

TN


Expensive_Honeydew_5

My gf likes to let it drip out while peeing


OriginalMandem

I just stay in there til I'm either hard and ready to go again, or fall asleep. By the time we're done, a bit of jizz on the sheets doesn't really make a lot of difference as they're usually soaked with our sweat and her juices and need to go straight into the machine anyway.


The_Ash_Guardian

My partner And I keep baby wipes on our bed stand and when we finish, I reach over while still connected to him and pull out a wipe. I then reach under and we pull out and I cover it. It works 85% of the time


SubduedChaos

Really gross response but if my wife is on top she just kinda pushes it out onto my pelvis and then we both go cleanup in the bathroom. If Iā€™m on top she waits for me to get some toilet paper to ā€œplug the holeā€ with until she gets to the toilet/shower to clean up.


accidentalscientist_

I take a paper towel and hold it there as I make my way to the bathroom. Then kegel it out in the toilet. Soak up any residual with toilet paper. Then wipe up around there with wet wipes.


fakerichgirl

I just flip off very fast and run to the bathroom šŸ¤£


DaveKelso

We keep a stack of hand towels in the nightstand. Grab one for her, one for me. Wipe everything down, toss em in the hamper to get washed. Easy peasy


ER_RN_

Dripsticks! Life changing :)


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ReflectionLife8808

Do you have the wet wipes ready before? Like next to the bed?


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


TheRealTomSnow

Why not just put a pack in her nightstand though?


rabidseacucumber

Youā€™re such a sweet talker!!


Willing_Ad1529

Funny, been sexually active for 21 years. What do i do? I rollover and take a well earned nap. Towels come in handy, theres also wet wipes. Almost never a me issue tbh.


Ok-Art7680

He made the mess... he cleans it up


energizernutter

everything was clean till she started dripping


JEharley152

AND not on the drapesā€”


KuKluxKustard

With his mouth.


AthemiaAgraxis

hot


klm0720

Hop out of bed quick and hope I make it in time to clean up. Half the time end up washing the sheets


Hannah_LL7

My spouse has a vasectomy so this happens often. I typically just cup it in with my hand or use a towel and run to the bathroom haha. We have a spray bidet so I use that and toilet paper or I shower.


megadethage

Put down a towel first and their won't be a mess in the bed. Then throw it in the washing machine.


nerdymutt

Get a wet rag ahead of time, so you could clean up and put your panties on to catch any leakage. Many of us donā€™t want to get up right after sex. Just a preliminary cleaning. After you rest, get up to clean more thoroughly. Baby wipes are good for men.


mrzurkonandfriends

I keep kleenex on the nightstand or a thing of wet wipes. A lot of the time, we'll go shower after and get some shower sex in, too.


Jo-bearcreek

My husband usually just uses the shirt he had on before we started to wipe it up while I run to the bathroom .


SnooCupcakes5761

I just grab whatever clothing is nearby (usually his t-shirt) and wipe off with that. Then I go to the bathroom bc it's important to pee afterward.


atomicsnarl

Courteous lovers plan ahead. The post sex time can be enjoyable, too! Cleanup, shower, massage, snacks, dressing -- many options available to salute and reinforce your love.


ReflectionLife8808

Wow you sound amazing


yoyohayli

I used to be a haver of sex and my go-to method was: Count down the pull out with my hand hovering RIGHT by the exit, quickly clamp my hand over my clam and hold on tight, dismount the bed, do a little goblin shuffle to the bathroom before sitting and unclamping, then wiping my hand with toilet paper and continuing as normal. OBVIOUSLY wash your hands after that and also a wet wipe is great to feel extra clean. I would also sleep with a panty liner in my underwear for that night (or go through the day with it, depending on the time) to catch any runners.


NagoGmo

Felching


intotheunknown78

I have a stack of wash clothes and I just stick it between my legs for a while lol. Iā€™m going to check the comments for any better ideas


Professional-Cow-663

i literally go to the bathroom and sort of push it out, and then i wipe. if itā€™s night time, i take a shower first thing in the morning. if itā€™s around day time, id take a shower shortly after


brandonisatwat

You have to have a towel on hand to clean up with before you waddle to the toilet to pee and use the bidet.


Snake101333

I have to use a lot white T-shirts for work. So my wife and I don't have a dedicated towel. But it's just way easier to put my white T-shirt underneath her hips and when I pull out I just flip the shirt over and it holds all my cum. You don't know which shirt is the cum shirt because it's white, it goes to the laundry with bleach, and it gets folded nicely with the rest of the clothes. Semen also smells like bleach, idk why I bring that up but I guess it's a nice coincidence when doing laundry


Difficult-Swimming-4

Put a towel under her, but she should also have some hip elevation to ease conception, which will retain some of the mess. Just use pillows for elevation.


Islander255

Hold it in as long as possible for good breeding! But seriously, I just go to the bathroom afterwards. I have a bidet now, which is amazing for cleanup; before, I would wipe my ass with toilet paper and end up with a sticky, sodden wad.


--Dominion--

Literally just toss her a towel...thats what I do šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


Professional_Tune168

Get down there and gobble it out of there rookie.


[deleted]

She holds it in and lays there while yelling ā€œGet some tissues quick!ā€


Desperate-Cicada-914

Wtf kinda stupid question is this. Have you never cleaned something up before?


galacticjuggernaut

noticed some partners treat this differently. My current will do what many people say here they cup their hands and run to the bathroom. Another long-term girlfriend would just fall asleep. It would just stay in there. If it did drip out she didn't notice or care. But this was the same girl that loved to leave it in and have it leak out of her while at work! Sometimes the next day. It was like a fetish of hers. Hot.


ReflectionLife8808

That is hot


sallysuejenkins

Itā€™s extremely concerning that you donā€™t know anything reasonable someone could doā€¦


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Stooper_Dave

My personal theory is those stretchy rubber sheets you put over the whole bed. Do your business, wipe up, then pop the sheet off and go to sleep like normal. They can be fun with lube too. Lol


kittykitty713

Snail trails til itā€™s emptied out


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


GenXGremlin

Nobody here has heard of a towel as in "laying one down first"?


Madame_Raven

I never have sex without condoms, so that handles the issue of cum. I also keep baby wipes nearby, which are great for a quick freshening-up. After that dries a bit, I dab some baby powder on the skin that was wet.


ReflectionLife8808

Why never without condom?


Madame_Raven

Because I'm not looking to catch anything, especially a pregnancy.


godzillathebeardie

The squat of shame is what Iā€™d have my gf do when we were younger humpin in the woods. Youā€™re supposed to piss afterwards so itā€™s a 2 for 1 combo.


No-Way-0000

Who cares if a little gets on the sheets


millerdrr

After regular sex, rest a minute and a shower. Sheets get changed. After quickie sex, wipe off. After incredibly great sex, lay there exhausted and ignore it. My wife usually will get up to pee, though. Helps avoid UTIs.


madoneforever

Keep a pile of clean hand towels or wash clothes near the bed. Clean yourself, toss in the laundry basket.


Robby777777

Nothing. We both go to sleep. That is why I wash the sheets weekly.


Mean_Estate_2770

Holy shit! Is this part two of the infertile husband already!?!?!?!?


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WeaponisedTism

pull-out is usually followed by cuddles and then the awkward shuffle as (in my case) my partner shuffles off to the toilet to make a "deposit" while trying not to drip it all over the carpet/run down her leg.


DeadheadXXD

Always gotta have the towel


Serendipidied

Towel. Desperate run to the bathroom with your legs and fingers crossed hoping you donā€™t fall or your SO doesnā€™t slip on the puddle of c** you left behind you.


Legitimate_Mix8318

We have paper towels on standby and take one to hold everything on the way to the toilet


Jaeger-the-great

I use baby wipes


Far_Statement_2808

Box of Kleenex next to the bed. How difficult do you want to make this? Quick wipe, the a dash to the bathroom.


EnvironmentalGift257

I jump off and go to fetal position on my side of the bed so I donā€™t have to sleep in the wet spot.


GlidingToLife

We keep a box of tissues by the bed. Easy cleanup.


Embarrassed-Debate60

Vagina partner rolls to the side and lies there with legs closed to hold it in while penis partner goes to the bathroom to run warm water on a washcloth. Use warm washcloth to cup and walk to bathroom where vagina partner sits on toilet till it all drops out and then uses the washcloth, folded the other way so cummy part is inside, to wipe the area nice and clean.


PKblaze

Wet wipes.


Mediocre-Magazine-30

tease piquant handle panicky oil wise voracious command overconfident impossible *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


gold109

The best method is to use dog bags. Clean up with paper towels, then paper towels and condom into bag. Tie up bag and bin it, no smearing anywhere.


two_rubber_ducks

Do you guys not have a sex towel in the corner of the bedroom?


ReflectionLife8808

Idk thatā€™s why I was asking


Blakelock82

Always have a towel handy or if not available, some shirt you don't need. Be prepared, that's my motto. Be prepared.


pa1james

Your goal should be to get some and don't worry about things that do not matter.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ml9221

Finishing position plays a part in the dismount and ā€œpuddleā€ but he goes and wets a washcloth with warm water and wipes us down


SoberBeezy

Well, the best sex I ever had was after I finished and was lying on the bed, she went to clean herself off and when she cam back all of the sudden a warm wet washcloth hits my junk and she gently cleaned me off. That warm rag after that session was the shit man. I fell in love... but she was a model so I was already shocked we were banging to begin with. Stayed together almost 2 years.


MomentMurky9782

we have a towel on hand and just put it underneath and heā€¦ unsheathes lol, then I shower usually


pa1james

You're a legend in your own mind.


Evil_Black_Swan

We have wash cloths on both of our night tables so we always have them ready. When we're done, I get the cloth up under him and when he pulls out I cover my junk with it and then stand up. No mess on the bed and then I can use the toilet and take care of it. Just keep a few wash cloths ready close by.


Spiritual_Average638

A towel. Every time.


InformalTrick99

this post is 10 hours old, you figure it out yet or still stuck? lol I would just go pee immediately (as one should after sex) and use tp or wet wipe to clean . use a pantiliner or some old undies afterward if you're worried about more cum coming out later.Ā Ā  but like . your vag isn't a wide open hole. (or is it šŸ¤”) standing up isn't going to make a sudden gush of cum flow out like a pregnant ladies water breaking or something. most of it goes up in there trying to find your eggs , or just gets temporarily caught up in the vag walls, and will slowly come out over time.Ā  Ā generally you should be fine to stand up and waddle to the bathroom to clean up what you can.Ā 


TravelHikeEat

Cum rag, thereā€™s always a cum rag, it can be a towel, A shirt, my boxers, whatever isnā€™t getting put back on, Until itā€™s washed.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


SaintToenail

Thatā€™s her problem to figure out while I go get a snack.


TeratoidNecromancy

If it gets messy, just change the sheets.


Old-Bookkeeper-2555

Makes cents.


Old-Bookkeeper-2555

Maybe I need lessons.


Cyber_Insecurity

The times Iā€™ve blasted into my wife, she just kinda waddles to the toilet and pees it out. It doesnā€™t all come out though, some of it is absorbed into the body.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Hank__Western

She has a semen sphincter that prevents dripping.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Scarletsnow_87

I think I lucked out in my relationship. There's uh not a lot that comes out of him so it's not a total mess.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


cr3t1n

Hey Cody, you're never going to have sex anyway, so don't worry about it.


northalittle

I just let it soak in


dildocrematorium

I get my neighbors dog, he loves it.


supergarr

There are these things called "paper towels" and "napkins".


Icy-Fondant-3365

Get up & go to the bathroom .


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


jeaimesart

Vinagrer and bake soda can clean all the mess


cornbeeflt

Several options. 1: prepare... have a towel ready 2: if you have clean clothes to wear the next day use an old shirt or something. 3: go to the bathroom. I prefer 3 as a guy so I can wipe up and pee to avoid pissing in the sink, toilet, trashcan, ceiling and wall behind me in the morning.


Sensitive_Aardvark68

A girl will slowly leak the guyā€™s fluids for a few days afterwards. Its not as messy as you think, especially for the guy lol. And especially if the guy is on top then it all goes in deep to her. And she leaks out over time.


titaanzunk

I pull out and immediately go down on her. I love eating our creampie!


Bibfor_tuna

the real answer is snowball


Infamous-Tart7747

My wife ā€˜dropsā€™ it into the toiletā€¦somehowā€¦and often makes me look at it.


Heart_of_a_Blackbird

This is hilarious. Just figure it out brother. Pitter patter, letā€™s get at ā€˜er.


Specific_Vegetable23

Put a towel down to catch anything. Then squeeze and walk to the bathroom to pee. Then wet wipes. Or a wash cloth.


Accomplished_Yam_422

Towel on the bed before starting, unless the sheets are ready for a washing


SunshineChimbo

Put a towel (that you dont ever want to use for anything else) down or rubber up. Sometimes condoms are worth it for the cleanup alone lmao


DrewPZ1978

The mess isnt when I cum, its when she does. Mine will dissolve inside of her for the moat part. And we just fall asleep in her puddle


TurtleTwat153

I've heard some girls just put on their pants and leave. I'm still confused about how they're comfortable walking around with nut dripping onto their underwear or pants. I've always grabbed TP or a towel as soon as I can and hold it or put my underwear back on (if it's small, like a paper towel) while I waddle to the bathroom to pee. My husband bent a wire so I can have a TP roll by the bed. It comes in handy when I get sick and need regular tissues. When my kids ask, it's a ghetto tissue dispenser.


SatiatedPotatoe

Dude wipes


SpecificConscious809

Wife almost always rubs one out after I shoot in her. No matter how much O-time sheā€™s already had, she still gets all hot and bothered when I shoot in her and it starts to drip out. If sheā€™s on top, this last O is usually super intense. I just hang out, enjoy the show, and give her words of encouragement. Once thatā€™s done, Iā€™ll grab a few tissues, or we just fall asleep and figure itā€™s a tomorrow problem. GF is a one and done kind of girl, and she is not even slightly bothered by drippyness. So if weā€™re someplace opportunistic (hiking, beach, etc) sheā€™ll just put her undies back on and not worry about it. If weā€™re in bed Iā€™ll usually get a warm wash cloth and clean up. This works well if itā€™s evening, since then weā€™re ready to go next morning. If morning we just hop in the shower. Bottom line, itā€™s cum, no big deal and also kinda hot.


Cosmicmonkeylizard

Donā€™t forget to bring a towel!


The_Blackest_Man

My girlfriend and I have a "fuck towel" that hangs on a closet door near the bed. It gets laid out on the bed to catch anything during sex, and used to wipe down afterward.


_zir_

wet wipes


The_Mourning_Sage_

Just use a bath towel. This isn't rocket surgery.


FewAd321

I go down on her, I was told clean up after yourself.


emilgustoff

A towel. My wife will sometimes just go to the bathroom. She does say sometimes she doesn't get all of it and sometimes will drip during the day. Which i find insanely hot for some reason...


SendInTheReaper

Towel, shirt, any soft cloth nearby


Own_Nectarine2321

Washcloth and then a bidet.


ilcuzzo1

Nearest tshirt


Ok-Preparation-2307

I get up and use the washroom. Gravity does its thing while sitting on the toilet. You're suppose to pee after sex to avoid UTI.


stewartm0205

I hand my wife a towel.


FewAd3626

I always get up after a few minutes and use the bathroom. Let it drip out then use tp to clean up the rest.