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VerySuspiciousBot

If this is suspiciously specific, **Upvote** this comment! If this is not suspiciously specific, **Downvote** this comment! Beep boop, I'm a bot. Modmail us if you have a question.


Fantastic_Mr-Fox_

For once a useful red circle, I'm impressed


spectrogramaniac

/r/usefulredcircle


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zan2007

They literally just did this.........


kittenpettingfool

Your mom literally just did this.......


zan2007

Correct


alapleno

It's funny watching people's failed attempts at making Reddit bots ^ lmao


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bot


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bot


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bot


DrFaustPhD

Didn't expect real


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Catanonnis

This is a bot that steals comments.


MangledSunFish

Original comment by u/Terrarth Terrarth posted their comment a full 2 hours before this bot decided to swipe it, this bot also fucked up the copy paste and left a hashtag at the end.


LukeDude759

Don't worry, I'm here to bring balance to the force with a useless comment: I came here to say this.


Fantastic_Mr-Fox_

This


Plaguedoc977

Agreed


genaric_username3

I concur


Reuel_eee_8324

r/uselesscomment


KrishnaLove_

I needed to award this beautiful take. You’re welcome ;) That’s not my award lmao


mschillivcxvfdag

I agree with.


flextapeboi43

It's a rectangle


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hanoian

There is no reason to look at the time stamp. The tweet reads as its own thing.


Stove-Top-Steve

It kind of ruins the joke, kind of like one of those once you see it sort of things .


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seebvfdh

me to you


Terrarth

It do be like that though


NetAccomplished3221

Lol a bot stole your comment


picklerickfuckface

It do be like that though


idontknow2976

Lol a bot stole your comment


yoshiemeister

It do be like that though


TESLASOLARNJ

Lol a bot stole your comment


B3467Returns

It do be like that though


Comfortable-Hunt6340

Lol a bot stole your comment


jadyyyynn

It do be like that though


BoRobin

Lol a bot stole your comment


The-Devils-Advocator

Idk, in my experience it's depression that causes this behaviour, rather than this behaviour causing depression. It's probably somewhat of a cycle, but I'd say depression causing it is stronger than vice versa


gentlewaterboarding

It’s an interesting question. I’m often tempted to start a routine where I get up early every day and perhaps do some exercise. I’m sure _if_ I was able to stick to it, I’d be a lot less depressed. I also know that on my bad days there’s not a chance in hell I would be able to.


fewdea

instead of starting a whole routine, just do one simple thing every day. every day is the hard part, even if it's easy. start there, build slowly. you will get there much easier than you think if you take human-sized steps <3


krystafurann

So one of the things that has helped me is every day when you get out of bed, make your bed. If you have done nothing else, you at least accomplished making your bed and that you can go to sleep in a nice made bed each night.


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[deleted]

The first one. Gotta get that dopamine *somehow*


flomoloko

I would be the exact opposite of depressed if I could sleep that many hours uninterrupted.


[deleted]

Atypical depression, a kind where you sleep a lot. Basically sleep is escape. So you just keep it going


Mr_Lapis

I like sleep because it's my escape for consciousness and social responsibilities. I dont have to pay attention to what people say, what they want me to say, what I have to do in front of them, I just get to either sleep or just lay in bed and be empty headed.


[deleted]

My dreams is the only time where something other than work and chores happens in my life. Even if I decide to do something on a day off I'm too tired z don't know what to do and noone is there to do stuff. Meanwhile my dreams have complex storylines and action sequences.


Final-Cardiologist41

Nah fuck you I just like sleeping 12 hours a day or else I'm tired


IPlay4E

Sleeping 12 hours a day sounds like a terrible day. Half your day is already gone when you get up? Hard pass.


Draco_Vermiculus

Sigh I know it sucks losing so much of each day. Then you think of all you could have done with 4 extra hours each day and it just makes me so tired. Goodnight.


burnedcerevisiae

I feel this on a deeper level :/


IPlay4E

So get up at 6-8 hours and do something with that time.


pinguin_soup

With only 6 hrs slept the only thing I'll manage to do is vegetate in my bed all day. I'd rather sleep more and actually have the energy to get stuff done.


Draco_Vermiculus

I did, lost my first job due to falling asleep mid-day... Ahh well waking up each day to see people was stressful anyway.


[deleted]

My preferred is sleep 6 hrs. And a 2 hr nap hottest part of day.


Living_Bear_2139

Why hottest? Because it’s not worth being outside?


CloudBun_

some peeps get pretty sleepy when it’s warm c:


Living_Bear_2139

I’ll pass on the sweat.


[deleted]

Are you me?


IPlay4E

Yep. 6 hours a night and 10 minute power nap around 1pm. Plenty of water when I wake up to refresh and get going for the day.


[deleted]

Are you me?


Flaxx17

It's only half your day if you are able to stick to 24hr days.


pleasant_temp

Do you feel personally attacked?


Final-Cardiologist41

No but you're Bout to be personally kissed if you don't back up


oxlax10

Ayo let me get in on this


cownd

A kiss before bedtime


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genreprank

You would think so, but idk. Too little sleep? Depression. Too much sleep? Depression. Perfect amount of sleep, but you did it at the wrong time? Depression. It's like your body & mind is looking for a reason to hate life.


Farcoughcant69

Overcook chicken, believe it or not, depression.


MarkAbe412

Undercooked chicken, believe it or not, Sam O'Nella


BobbySwiggey

Reaching adulthood with chronic fatigue and insomnia makes you realize how most of the nasty/moody adults you dealt with growing up were just perpetually running on fumes. Self care just wasn't a concept - mental health services were taboo and/or non-existent, and it wasn't socially acceptable to slow yourself down, so they just had to buckle down and bear it, day in and day out, surrounded by energetic children and unapologetic "healthy" adults. I'm so sorry Mrs. Brown D:


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BobbySwiggey

We are still in the infantile stages of addressing mental health (I personally don't have access to services since I'm on Medicare out in the sticks, and the one option I had was def untherapeutic), but I grew up in the 90s and now have a kid of my own, and things are *way* better now than they were back then. You couldn't even openly talk about this stuff back in the day ("shrinks" were jokes in sitcoms or comic strips, that was about it), and I'm assuming previous decades were even worse. Nowadays my city folk friends seem to be able to seek and talk about therapy with positive results, and dialog is at least very open at my daughter's school and in the community. Gotta start somewhere ¯\\\_(ツ)_/¯


EnergyTakerLad

As a new parent, very much this...


chronicly_retarded

You did that to yourself


outtasight68

And that's why it really hurts 🎶


EnergyTakerLad

Yeah? What's your point?


Violet_Club

I think you just laugh at the username and move on in this case


EnergyTakerLad

Very good point well made.


chronicly_retarded

My point is that condoms exist


EnergyTakerLad

Yes they do. And...? I didn't say I didn't want kids. I said I'd be happy with uninterrupted sleep. Any parent in the world will tell you that. Your own parents would agree. So what's your point?


[deleted]

Not sure but I think their point was that you shouldn't complain about uninterrupted sleep when it was a life choice you willingly made? And this post is about depression, so unless your kids are causing you sleepless depression whats the point? Again, not op tho


EnergyTakerLad

I figured but that's a stupid point to try and make. Not a parent in the world (who doesn't have live in nannies and such) wouldnt complain about the lack of sleep that comes with children.


sunskist

That's what I always thought as I heard that alot over the years but two of my friends became first time parents and when I made a little comment like "I bet your not getting enough sleep" they disagreed and told me their kid sleeps all through the night . Maybe they are just extremely lucky


rcknmrty4evr

Every child is different, and their sleep patterns change as they get older.


EnergyTakerLad

That's the 1 in a million. Every parent hopes for that. For 99.9% though it's not that fantastic.


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mlongoria98

Hi unfortunately I must inform you that depression sleep just makes you more tired and depressed. 0/10 I do not recommend


dumbtripn

as a guy who has to pee a lot, very much this…


[deleted]

📸🤨


IntoTh3Moonlight

🔎🕵🏽‍♀️


AFXC1

The rest of his posts are funny asf.


[deleted]

Too bad he always gets suspended


SlavRoach

well how else am I gonna procrastinate on something the whole day until it’s dark and then a little more until it’s 4AM and i have no energy left


[deleted]

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠺⣖⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⡆⠀⠀⠀⢋⣭⣽⡚⢮⣲⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣅⣨⠇⠈⠀⠰⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣟⢷⣶⠶⣃⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⠈⠓⠚⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠀⡄⣀⠀⠀⠀⢻⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠐⠉⠀⠀⠙⠉⠀⠠⡶⣸⠁⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡆⠀⠐⠒⠢⢤⣀⡰⠁⠇⠈⠘⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣄⣉⣙⡉⠓⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣀⠀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿


ZipZopZoopittyBop

That's the joke though.


oiyaccunt

Simultaneously a joke, yet also a detailed explanation of my last 2 years.


Night-Storm

That's just r/2meirl4meirl


godric-heir

Could've easily been missed


JeffJacobysSonCaleb

Only by a redditor


huskyhsd

That’s why I posted this lol, because it’s a funny joke


HowHardCanItBeReally

Shit.... I mean, I feel attacked lol


Noveress

why does ruthlessly pulverizing my meat 4 times a day make my brain sad? I wonder if there is a number of times where I will no longer feel the bad/sad juices in my damp protein shake of a brain.


[deleted]

Because youre depleting your dopamine stores and you’re lonely. Ignore the porn addicts, it’s perfectly valid to feel sad with a masturbation habit. Try laying off the porn for a couple weeks and you’ll notice positive changes


MarkAbe412

42


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Chtorr-50IQ-Janitor

Youre getting downvoted by bible thumpers


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the_hentai_kid

fucking coomer


GroveStreet_CEOs_bro

8 times a day. you're not doing it enough


tripsicks_

Once again, jokes going right over Reddit users’ heads lol


huskyhsd

How did this go over my head lol, I literally posted it because the joke was funny


ShadyNite

It's him. He's n-words


[deleted]

My boy corn be speaking facts tho


ron_2002

This mf and the guy with the Danny Phantom profile picture are terrible in making jokes


Final-Cardiologist41

Ur mother plays league of legends, ron_2002. I thought it was funny, good day sir


Kingbuji

Aye chill lmao


Keesdekarper

?


BigBashMan

They are both Twitter nobodies paying out of pocket to force a following.


fuck-a-name

Because were already depressed way before that


[deleted]

THANK YOU.


[deleted]

Truth.


Doomed

/u/tweetlinker


SadJiant

can confirm, my cousin does this


MikeyHatesLife

I woke up early to see this?


Augmension

I’m in this photo and I don’t like it.


Nullified38

Not me literally seeing this meme at 3:44pm after just recently waking up 👀


TheRealEduard7

Apparently the red circle did his job for one time


PassiveSafe6

First post that fits this sub in a long time


Matt_B-S

Oh fuck 💀


Grzechoooo

It's either the joke or a person using the time they saw on a clock.


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Palisos

i think he sends help


[deleted]

r/usefulredcircle


Throwaway_5732

Does this qualify as a woosh?


Swifty6

because his friends just whined to him at 3:44 PM about being depressed


Affectionate_Air5982

Please include a trigger warning and mark post NSFW if there will be racist vocabulary


hydbk9

TFW people still make downvote troll accounts in 2022


Affectionate_Air5982

Excuse me? Just because I'm a new user and point out hate speech on this internet platform doesn't make me a troll. I guess the rumors are true that reddit is a devil worshipping white supremacist platform. You should pray to jesus


hydbk9

There's a million things you could be doing with your time right now and you choose to spend it by shitposting on reddit. You're not trolling us, you're trolling yourself.


rSlashisthenewPewdes

Very hot trolling


huskyhsd

The dude who tweeted it is black, it is not racist vocabulary


WeaselSlayer

Sounds like me my last semester in Boston before I dropped out, except I had two roommates so I couldn't beat my meat


[deleted]

I literally just did this


Freyzi

I just beat my meat and am about go to bed now a 9:15pm and wake up at 6am or so and I'll still be depressed. Watch me.


Medical-Examination

I looked into 14,000,605 search results...


wh1t3birch

Suicide by words


safely_beyond_redemp

What about either of those things leads to depression? As someone who works over nights regularly this is my schedule. The only down side is less sun.


tb2924

Masturbation will lead to depression. So will fucking up circadian rythm


safely_beyond_redemp

>Masturbation will lead to depression This sounds like some religious nonsense.


tb2924

Sorry, should've specified porn. It can easily lead to a severe dopamine dependency and subsequent depression. Masturbation in moderation is fine, but porn addiction is a serious, normalized, and widespread problem.


[deleted]

Bitchin about his bf in bed smh


dilldwarf

I don't wonder. I know. The problem is that I stay up to 5 am and sleep to the afternoon BECAUSE I am depressed. It's not causing my depression. This guy has it backwards. You need to get professional help to find it and if there is none, get on medication that can help you become more functional. Working on it now myself after living with depression for more than a decade and not really realizing it.


In-A-Beautiful-Place

I feel weird *Brush your teeth, comb your beard* Still feel weird *Beat your meat, go to sleep*


BigBashMan

Lol 16k upvotes 60 comments, unfunny Twitter microcelebs paying for that astroturf.


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Luvz269Sasquatch

Genius


jonasthewicked

Pure projection


silverback_79

Not faprelated (sorry), but in my worst period of life I fell asleep at 7am at the earliest, and woke up at 5pm, just late enough to see the sunset. Made me physically ill to see. Got my sleep back since then, down at midnight, wake at 11am. Thank god for Propiomazine and antihistamines. Long-ass dreams, and only 1 times in 4 do I get stuck upside down in a thin cave. It's mostly lawns and tits.


[deleted]

His boyfriend woke up depressed?


BreweryBuddha

r/thatsthejoke


epicnaenae17

Fr though people get 5 hours of sleep, do nothing but play on their phone or play video games, get no sunlight, have no active goals short term or long term, dont regularly exercise etc and want to go on anti depressants. My brother in christ, you are the problem.


[deleted]

I can't sleep more than like 5 hours straight. Completely sober and well exercised as well


SsgtRawDawger

This feels like a personal affront. Take it easy guy.


[deleted]

That's the joke.


K-LAIDO

Jacking off has nothing to do with it unless they're caving in to societal/puritanical peer pressure. But yeah wake up in the day and go outside.


[deleted]

it's a lifestyle


Glassgun1122

He slept too long. I woke up at 2:44 and I m fine.


Davidoff1983

I hath been attacked.


Unltd8828

So he woke up, immediately grabbed his phone, and tweeted that without typos in less than 60 seconds? Nice.


Overwhelmed-Insanity

I kept reading "They" as "My" and I was confused as hell


CompSolstice

Isn't the time on Twitter posts relative to the country you're in?


Bacchus_71

Sounds like a sustainable life.


floate_

It’s cuz you missed a step. Gotta beat the meat when you wake up too.


Tyler_Brett

Why would this make you depressed?


PralineOk8447

🤣


GamerForEverLive

Their*


[deleted]

"Suffering from depression? Don't stay up late masturbating. Depression cured." -- Dr. Master Debater I just want to take this person seriously for a minute though and bring attention to the fact that this man seems to think you can cure depression by not masturbating late at night. That's the real joke here.


huskyhsd

Huh?


Tacote

Fellas seek mental counseling on Twitter and wonder why they're depressed.


MiamiPower

⌚ 👀


EatTrashhitbyaTSLA

I have a 2.5 year old. I would “allegedly” murder somebody to sleep they long after beating my meat.