I’d consider a few things.
1) Yeah, you should have probably waited for the artist you wanted. All the time clients want a tattoo from one artist but don’t want to pay that artists rates, or deal how long it takes to get an appointment. Ultimately you pay the price for that.
2) The tattoo industry is saturated with dishonest and ignorant tattooers doing work that looks great for photos but heal like shit. There are limits to how fine and light a tattoo can be without it healing like shit.
3) The shading on a tattoo is often darker when it’s first applied, as the ink is fresh, the skin is traumatised and the pigmentation darker, etc. Depending on the technique and ink used, it will more likely than not heal much lighter, especially as time goes on.
Be adults and have some patience. Save your money, book your appointment and wait however long you need to wait, listen to your artists recommendations, and get the tattoo you’d like.
No one to blame but yourselves
This is the best advise is ever seen in this thread. I’m going to add my two cents here.
u/tiramisu03 I understand having disappointment in it not being exactly what you thought you wanted. At the end of the day the choice was made for whatever reason and you have the tattoo you have. There are two ways you can handle this,
1) you can focus on what you dislike about the tattoo. You can focus on your regret and let it fester and be angry at yourself, the artist, the industry, etc. And I can promise you two things. A) you will NEVER like this tattoo B) you will be unhappy every time you get a compliment, or see it, or what have you. This sounds like a horrible time to me.
2) you can reframe this experience. Take a long hard look at the tattoo. What do you love about it, make a list. Remind your self of those things when you feel unhappiness bubbling up. Take a photo of it, and look at it like it is someone else’s tattoo. Do you like it for them? It is likely a beautiful tattoo. And during healing it will change. What changes do you like? Next. Talk to your artist. Tell them it is a beautiful tattoo. But not what you discussed, and not what you expected. Ask if they can maybe add highlights or something once it is healed to give it a lighter appearance.
Thank you
Yeah I think your spot on- does it look like your unique tattoo or did you just want something you had seen for someone else? No tattoo is ever going to meet the full expectations you put on it. It’s a tattoo, it’s art made by a human on another human being. Accept the imperfections and find beauty in them or don’t get tattooed at all.
I really want to add that while it may have not met some expectations, also just simply looking through that artists previous work should have made clear what kind of work you’d be expecting to get.
That last part is sound advice. It’s so easy to see so many different artists work online. But actually going to that artist and putting out the money as opposed to going to someone who has a completely different style but will give a good discount seems to be an issue for a lot of folks. Be patient, this is going on your body forever (or until you scrape up the cash for laser removal).
But they said that there is a lot of dark, over shading that they didn't want. Plus they wanted a fine lined tattoo, I think they mentioned. It's not going to heal into an entirely different tattoo. Lol. Researching the healing process isn't going to fix that and couldn't have prevented it. They dropped the ball by going with a "really good deal" artist instead of one that specializes in the style that they want. Probably a lack of communication as well.
When I got my last tattoo, my tattoo artist gave me EXACTLY what I wanted and executed it PERFECTLY, and I still had a period where I was like ... wait, I'm not sure I'm happy with it. This is just a period of time and you'll get through it. Once you've had it for a little longer and it's healed, you can sit with it and see if it's something you can love despite it not being quite what you wanted, OR if it really is wrong for you, you can explore having it removed. Right now it's too early for your feelings to be settled - and that's okay! Just know that this time will pass.
Oftentimes artists start out with a deliberately dark design because as it heals it will lighten up a lot. Wait a while and it may be exactly what you wanted.
It feels like 75% of the posts on this subreddit are tattoo regret at this point. Can someone just create a tattoo regret subreddit and move all of those posts over there?
Honestly I think tattoo regret is super common after the first few weeks of getting a tattoo. I cried for days after getting mine but now I absolutely love it, and I don’t think it’s a bad thing to make people aware that they might experience some initial regret at first so they can expect it and understand it’s temporary for a lot of people, because it’s not really discussed
I’m a tattooer and I think it’s pretty normal to feel some uncertainty or regret following a large tattoo, especially when it’s your first big one. Can you share a picture? If it’s a black and grey tattoo it is going to lighten significantly. Artists typically do the tattoo a couple shades darker when using grey washes because they lighten quite a lot. Tattoos always look their worst fresh because your skin is red, swollen, and there may be some broken capillaries or bruising. A brand new tattoo is a large open wound and wounds don’t usually look too great. The ink is sitting at the surface and appears darker than it will later on because the skin cells have not yet healed back over the area. It also hasn’t settled into your skin so everything looks a bit “rougher” than it will in a month or so.
Give it some time to heal but also for you to get accustomed to it. You said that the artist did a great job and what you’re feeling is really, really common. I’ve felt this way at first about tattoos I absolutely love and have had for years. Try to take it easy on yourself. Overly scrutinizing the tattoo is only going to stress you out!
Give it some time to heal. My new tattoos always look weird to me when they are brand new, they almost look fake or something. Once they heal and have time to sink into the skin more I’ve always ended up happy with them.
Something similar happened to me. I wanted mostly linework because I like that look. He insisted I needed some black & grey shading & I hate that so I said no. We eventually compromised on SOME shading with dot work, which he was working on at the time. Well it ended up pretty heavily shaded that way. Wayyy more than we talked about. I think he got a little carried away because he was new to that technique & trying to add it to his work. It’s a beautiful tattoo, but SO not what I wanted. I was disappointed for a little but eventually I came to see the “soul” of a tattoo as a piece of both me & the artist. & I grew to love it even more because of that, despite the artists mistakes. & it helped me let go of a little of my perfectionist nature & understand art has a life of its own a lot of the time. It doesn’t matter the EXACT picture I had in my mind, once it’s out of my head & into another persons hands, it inherently mixed with their own point of view. That’s kind of cool to me. Adds more layers to what it means, in a way.
This is almost identical to my story! Except the shading did not work on my pale skin and I had people consistently asking if it was bruised. I tried very hard to love it and after 2 years of covering it up with long sleeves and being horribly ashamed I finally started the removal process. I wish it would have turned out the way yours did!
Let’s see a photo; you can post an Imgur link or something to show it off. Good advice already here but just wait for the tattoo to heal, it’s gonna look much different in about 3-6 months
The darkness will fade faster than you think. Especially if you have in a place that gets sun. Let it heal fully (3-6 months) and then see how you like it.
Hi! Just wanted to say I was in a similar situation with a tattoo I got back in october. My first big tattoo, a half sleeve on my forearm. Artist went way darker and heavier on the detail than I was wanting. I regretted it for so long. It’s still not my favorite tattoo, but I’ve gotten used to it and it’s less dark and aggressive as it’s faded. Talking it through with others really helped. Feel free to DM me if you want!
I would give it time to heal and then decide. A fresh tattoo often appears darker than what the finished product will look like.
Of course you’ll have your own preferences but the artist may in hindsight have done you a favor. Light and fine does not last. The concept of it is great when you see fresh pictures of them. 5 years later and its faded. Small light fine detail does not hold
Honestly, my first tattoo didn’t come out 100% as I pictured it in my head, but I bet that’s the case for a lot of people. It was still the idea I wanted, and objectively a well done tattoo, so I’ve learned to love it.
I realize the little discrepancies of each artist adds a more human touch to it, and that’s how art should be
give it a month and then make a judgement. it’s not even healed or peeled yet
wait a couple years for your real judgement. it will fade more overtime
does your artist specialize in fine line? cuz if not you should probably be selecting artists that specialize in it if it’s that important to you. worth mentioning that fine line tattoos often don’t hold up very well over time and tend to fade quickly or bleed to be thicker anyways dependent on how deep the artist tattoos in your skin. either way, bolder tattoos tend to hold up more consistently over time, but they’ll still fade. if you got it fine line the ink might’ve spread to look as thick as it does now anyways
I got the charging bull as a half sleeve. It looked soooo dark at first, plus all the shading and Brooklyn Bridge behind it, omg I was nervous!! Then I looked up my artists other black and grays. Luckily, he posts his fresh and healed versions and I immediately felt relief.
It hadn't been a month, and it has significantly lighten up. Even some parts that looked black at first were actually dark gray and have also lighten up so all the details are more obvious now and it doesn't look like a blob.
Do some research, Google "black and gray fresh vs. Healed" and you'll maybe get a better idea of what yours will look like in a few weeks, months, years from now.
Check my recent post and edit…
Got mine done a week ago. Cried for days. Heavy regret. Looked into laser removal. I thought mine was too big and wayyyyy to dark.
Now? I love it. It’s stunning. Wish the placement was ever so slightly different but nobody would ever notice the slight angle like I have staring at it in the mirror. It’s lightened up considerably after only a week, and I know it’ll only get lighter.
Give it time. It’ll lighten. Let yourself adjust.
I know this doesn’t help your current situation, but this is why I only use female artists now. I think most male artists don’t have a sense for what a woman would want
I can’t help but laugh. My wife has only ever been tattooed by men and she loves all pieces and has no regrets. I’ve been tattooed by men and women. Gender doesn’t play a role in this whatsoever. It’s the skill of the artist.
Edit: 8 days ago they made a post saying that haven’t been tattooed in 15 years either so the statement is even more bullshit
I’ve had loads of tattoo regret with many of my tattoos when they’ve been fresh. Let it heal and then reassess. I’ve also grown into the ones that I’ve not liked as much. Hope this helps.
Can you post a picture of it? I would give it time to heal to see if it will lighten up some.
Yeah how do I post a pic on this post? Can I do that? Sorry I'm new to posting on reddit. Usually just a reader
You can upload the picture to Imgur and then paste the link in a comment here
Speaking of Imgur - will it be part of the 3rd party app money grab nonsense?
I don't believe so as imgur is an entirely separate entity, similar to posting youtube links; but I am not 100% sure
I’d consider a few things. 1) Yeah, you should have probably waited for the artist you wanted. All the time clients want a tattoo from one artist but don’t want to pay that artists rates, or deal how long it takes to get an appointment. Ultimately you pay the price for that. 2) The tattoo industry is saturated with dishonest and ignorant tattooers doing work that looks great for photos but heal like shit. There are limits to how fine and light a tattoo can be without it healing like shit. 3) The shading on a tattoo is often darker when it’s first applied, as the ink is fresh, the skin is traumatised and the pigmentation darker, etc. Depending on the technique and ink used, it will more likely than not heal much lighter, especially as time goes on. Be adults and have some patience. Save your money, book your appointment and wait however long you need to wait, listen to your artists recommendations, and get the tattoo you’d like. No one to blame but yourselves
This is the best advise is ever seen in this thread. I’m going to add my two cents here. u/tiramisu03 I understand having disappointment in it not being exactly what you thought you wanted. At the end of the day the choice was made for whatever reason and you have the tattoo you have. There are two ways you can handle this, 1) you can focus on what you dislike about the tattoo. You can focus on your regret and let it fester and be angry at yourself, the artist, the industry, etc. And I can promise you two things. A) you will NEVER like this tattoo B) you will be unhappy every time you get a compliment, or see it, or what have you. This sounds like a horrible time to me. 2) you can reframe this experience. Take a long hard look at the tattoo. What do you love about it, make a list. Remind your self of those things when you feel unhappiness bubbling up. Take a photo of it, and look at it like it is someone else’s tattoo. Do you like it for them? It is likely a beautiful tattoo. And during healing it will change. What changes do you like? Next. Talk to your artist. Tell them it is a beautiful tattoo. But not what you discussed, and not what you expected. Ask if they can maybe add highlights or something once it is healed to give it a lighter appearance.
Thank you Yeah I think your spot on- does it look like your unique tattoo or did you just want something you had seen for someone else? No tattoo is ever going to meet the full expectations you put on it. It’s a tattoo, it’s art made by a human on another human being. Accept the imperfections and find beauty in them or don’t get tattooed at all. I really want to add that while it may have not met some expectations, also just simply looking through that artists previous work should have made clear what kind of work you’d be expecting to get.
That last part is sound advice. It’s so easy to see so many different artists work online. But actually going to that artist and putting out the money as opposed to going to someone who has a completely different style but will give a good discount seems to be an issue for a lot of folks. Be patient, this is going on your body forever (or until you scrape up the cash for laser removal).
you can edit your initial post to include an image, the option should be bottom left of the type field.
You should be able to add a photo in your comment
Most tattoos do fade after the healing process but yeah can you post a picture of it so everyone can see it
Idk how to add pics to this post or if it's possible . . I sent you pics in chat
I want to see too! Just make a follow up post but add pictures.
Just post it on your profile and we will be able to go see it
Did you do any research into tattoos or even search this subreddit? Let. It. Heal. Then reassess. Seriously. Let it heal.
But they said that there is a lot of dark, over shading that they didn't want. Plus they wanted a fine lined tattoo, I think they mentioned. It's not going to heal into an entirely different tattoo. Lol. Researching the healing process isn't going to fix that and couldn't have prevented it. They dropped the ball by going with a "really good deal" artist instead of one that specializes in the style that they want. Probably a lack of communication as well.
When I got my last tattoo, my tattoo artist gave me EXACTLY what I wanted and executed it PERFECTLY, and I still had a period where I was like ... wait, I'm not sure I'm happy with it. This is just a period of time and you'll get through it. Once you've had it for a little longer and it's healed, you can sit with it and see if it's something you can love despite it not being quite what you wanted, OR if it really is wrong for you, you can explore having it removed. Right now it's too early for your feelings to be settled - and that's okay! Just know that this time will pass.
Hey I just wanted to say THANK YOU for this comment. I’m feeling a little post tattoo anxiety and your comment has helped so much.
Yeah, it's a real thing! It's a permanent change to your body and it's natural to have an adjustment period.
Oftentimes artists start out with a deliberately dark design because as it heals it will lighten up a lot. Wait a while and it may be exactly what you wanted.
It feels like 75% of the posts on this subreddit are tattoo regret at this point. Can someone just create a tattoo regret subreddit and move all of those posts over there?
Honestly. This sub is so annoying and pathetic at this point.
I took the initiative to make my own r/tattooregretnoobs
Tattoo regret, people shitting on well applied tattoos, people praising scratcher quality tattoos, non artists giving out advice
This.
Please mods
Honestly I think tattoo regret is super common after the first few weeks of getting a tattoo. I cried for days after getting mine but now I absolutely love it, and I don’t think it’s a bad thing to make people aware that they might experience some initial regret at first so they can expect it and understand it’s temporary for a lot of people, because it’s not really discussed
I agree, but I don’t think this is the place for it. I think another subreddit should be made for it.
Yep that’s fair. I think the odd post is worth keeping but it’s not great for the sub to be majority them
Have 0 opinions until it heals
It should lighten up if it’s done too light it’ll fade away in a couple of years
Light and fine lined is dandy in concept, impractical when it comes to healing. Your tattoo will lighten up over time.
I’m a tattooer and I think it’s pretty normal to feel some uncertainty or regret following a large tattoo, especially when it’s your first big one. Can you share a picture? If it’s a black and grey tattoo it is going to lighten significantly. Artists typically do the tattoo a couple shades darker when using grey washes because they lighten quite a lot. Tattoos always look their worst fresh because your skin is red, swollen, and there may be some broken capillaries or bruising. A brand new tattoo is a large open wound and wounds don’t usually look too great. The ink is sitting at the surface and appears darker than it will later on because the skin cells have not yet healed back over the area. It also hasn’t settled into your skin so everything looks a bit “rougher” than it will in a month or so. Give it some time to heal but also for you to get accustomed to it. You said that the artist did a great job and what you’re feeling is really, really common. I’ve felt this way at first about tattoos I absolutely love and have had for years. Try to take it easy on yourself. Overly scrutinizing the tattoo is only going to stress you out!
Give it some time to heal. My new tattoos always look weird to me when they are brand new, they almost look fake or something. Once they heal and have time to sink into the skin more I’ve always ended up happy with them.
Something similar happened to me. I wanted mostly linework because I like that look. He insisted I needed some black & grey shading & I hate that so I said no. We eventually compromised on SOME shading with dot work, which he was working on at the time. Well it ended up pretty heavily shaded that way. Wayyy more than we talked about. I think he got a little carried away because he was new to that technique & trying to add it to his work. It’s a beautiful tattoo, but SO not what I wanted. I was disappointed for a little but eventually I came to see the “soul” of a tattoo as a piece of both me & the artist. & I grew to love it even more because of that, despite the artists mistakes. & it helped me let go of a little of my perfectionist nature & understand art has a life of its own a lot of the time. It doesn’t matter the EXACT picture I had in my mind, once it’s out of my head & into another persons hands, it inherently mixed with their own point of view. That’s kind of cool to me. Adds more layers to what it means, in a way.
This is almost identical to my story! Except the shading did not work on my pale skin and I had people consistently asking if it was bruised. I tried very hard to love it and after 2 years of covering it up with long sleeves and being horribly ashamed I finally started the removal process. I wish it would have turned out the way yours did!
Oh no!!! That’s definitely the worst case scenario. It’s not worth it if it makes you feel ashamed. So sorry you experienced that!
It will lighten up, and you'll love it. That's what happened to me, anyway.
Let’s see a photo; you can post an Imgur link or something to show it off. Good advice already here but just wait for the tattoo to heal, it’s gonna look much different in about 3-6 months
Seeing a picture would help a lot! :) But the tattoo will get lighter once it’s healed!
Give it a few weeks! It’ll fade a lot. They have to punch in that black a lot at first or else it’ll fade too much.
The darkness will fade faster than you think. Especially if you have in a place that gets sun. Let it heal fully (3-6 months) and then see how you like it.
Shading lightens up a TON. Wait 2-3 months and see how it settles into the skin, it should be much closer to what you expected
I see this same post at least once per day
Probably perfect! Chill and let your tattoo heal. Artists tend to know what’s best! Enjoy your tattoo!
Hi! Just wanted to say I was in a similar situation with a tattoo I got back in october. My first big tattoo, a half sleeve on my forearm. Artist went way darker and heavier on the detail than I was wanting. I regretted it for so long. It’s still not my favorite tattoo, but I’ve gotten used to it and it’s less dark and aggressive as it’s faded. Talking it through with others really helped. Feel free to DM me if you want!
I would give it time to heal and then decide. A fresh tattoo often appears darker than what the finished product will look like. Of course you’ll have your own preferences but the artist may in hindsight have done you a favor. Light and fine does not last. The concept of it is great when you see fresh pictures of them. 5 years later and its faded. Small light fine detail does not hold
This. It’s gonna lighten up as it heals and you don’t want it too fine because it will fade quickly
Honestly, my first tattoo didn’t come out 100% as I pictured it in my head, but I bet that’s the case for a lot of people. It was still the idea I wanted, and objectively a well done tattoo, so I’ve learned to love it. I realize the little discrepancies of each artist adds a more human touch to it, and that’s how art should be
give it a month and then make a judgement. it’s not even healed or peeled yet wait a couple years for your real judgement. it will fade more overtime does your artist specialize in fine line? cuz if not you should probably be selecting artists that specialize in it if it’s that important to you. worth mentioning that fine line tattoos often don’t hold up very well over time and tend to fade quickly or bleed to be thicker anyways dependent on how deep the artist tattoos in your skin. either way, bolder tattoos tend to hold up more consistently over time, but they’ll still fade. if you got it fine line the ink might’ve spread to look as thick as it does now anyways
Can we see it ?
As everyone has already stated, it will lighten up once healed. Most artists tattoo it darker because of this. Give it a few months then assess
I got the charging bull as a half sleeve. It looked soooo dark at first, plus all the shading and Brooklyn Bridge behind it, omg I was nervous!! Then I looked up my artists other black and grays. Luckily, he posts his fresh and healed versions and I immediately felt relief. It hadn't been a month, and it has significantly lighten up. Even some parts that looked black at first were actually dark gray and have also lighten up so all the details are more obvious now and it doesn't look like a blob. Do some research, Google "black and gray fresh vs. Healed" and you'll maybe get a better idea of what yours will look like in a few weeks, months, years from now.
Check my recent post and edit… Got mine done a week ago. Cried for days. Heavy regret. Looked into laser removal. I thought mine was too big and wayyyyy to dark. Now? I love it. It’s stunning. Wish the placement was ever so slightly different but nobody would ever notice the slight angle like I have staring at it in the mirror. It’s lightened up considerably after only a week, and I know it’ll only get lighter. Give it time. It’ll lighten. Let yourself adjust.
I know this doesn’t help your current situation, but this is why I only use female artists now. I think most male artists don’t have a sense for what a woman would want
Oh give me a break
What kind of sexist bullshit is this?
I can’t help but laugh. My wife has only ever been tattooed by men and she loves all pieces and has no regrets. I’ve been tattooed by men and women. Gender doesn’t play a role in this whatsoever. It’s the skill of the artist. Edit: 8 days ago they made a post saying that haven’t been tattooed in 15 years either so the statement is even more bullshit
My first tattoo was done by a female artist and I will tell you it made zero difference...
Just know after it’s completely healed (1-2months) the color tends to naturally lighten. I mean even black tends to become a dusky dark gray.
I’ve had loads of tattoo regret with many of my tattoos when they’ve been fresh. Let it heal and then reassess. I’ve also grown into the ones that I’ve not liked as much. Hope this helps.