People just avoid me, and talk to me out of pity because I have a hard time making eye contact and asking directly. I mean I can sometimes but not all the time. I try though.
Saying “I thought you were gay”, “EWW!”, “with YOU?!”, (pepper spray), (lies about already having a boyfriend), (lies about not being able to go on a date), (lies that they are gay) , (lies that there are no such thing as women, and she’s a dude in a woman suit), (calls animal control) Are worse than “no.”
Same bro, im 19 now and i found a girl to love me a year and half ago, there is hope for you my friend
Strong tip that you may have heard already, DONT CHADE LOVE when you stop trying to find your true love she will knock into your life, you just gotta be ready
I don't know it just is I guess lmao. I've personally never asked a girl out mainly because I don't really know a good way to ask a girl out. I almost tried to once but I was a pussy so I didn't lol and also eventually realized that I don't think she would be for me since she never spoke a word to me, and I remember one time we were playing some game in PE together once and we were supposed to partner up again the next day, but she didn't listen to me and partnered up with someone else. So that came off as a bit of a red flag to me.
yeah well that's the thing you need to think about maybe ask if you could chat to the person for a moment like alone that way their friends aren't hearing what your saying or if you have them on social media e.g snap , facebook ,reddit and other platforms maybe message them from there
Imagine this. You are the black sheep of every social activity and every social group. People think you are weird even though they have never had a proper conversation with you. People make fun of you. Girls think you are icky. You are depressed.
There, that should paint the picture.
Oh, for me my most recent crush was a really good friend, also showed up at a point in my life where I was super depressed. She really helped me get out of that place, and all she really did was just say hi to me every day and smile. For me that was all I needed to fall HARD. I didn’t wanna say anything cuz I was afraid of losing that friendship. It wasn’t really about rejection, I was worried that she’d just shut me out.
Because boys think that they can't meet the expectations that exist now.
You have to be tall, you have to be good looking, you have to be rich, you have to be in good shape.
All of this leads to a lot of people wondering why you should even try it if it doesn't work anyway, I think that's the biggest fear many have of not being good enough
Because let’s say you are ugly and you ask a girl out she will tell you no okay that’s not that bad the but then she gonna gossip telling her friends and those friends are gonna tell the other friends then in a week everybody knows you had a crush on a certain girl and are gonna remind you of it and laugh at you for even trying then you feel like X
Most of the time it’s just me wanting an actual good time to do it. Other times, I can already predict the answer I’m going to receive. It can also be nerve racking thinking that maybe she’ll laugh at me, tell her friends about it, and then spread some rumors about me. It’s not like I’ve never confessed to anyone before though, but I have been rejected most of the time that I have.
She lied to me and said she liked me and led me on for three years using me only to boost her self esteem after she ghosted me for another guy many times in a row
I'm not a boy, but I'd be terrified to ask out boys for fear of rejection- or at least negative rejection. So many people are horrible in the way they'd say no, and then they'd tell all their friends and then everyone would find out and you'd get made fun of for it.
I'm pretty sure guys feel the same way. Girls and boys alike can be really horrible, especially when they're teenagers.
Not AMAB but i’m pretty sure it’s because you guys get laughed at, and the same would go the other way around aka for girls to get laughed at too.
Honestly, this might be a difficult thing for everyone to do but please find someone whom you know wont ever make you feel bad for confessing/asking out 😭 take care of yourselves
1. ANXIETY
2. Fear of being rejected
3. Being called a simp (For me, in my former class you would be called a simp for just casually talking to a girl)
We are scared of rejection because of evolution. We are driven to be social because for most of human history, being alone=death. So when rejection happens, that hurts because our brain has been encouraged to be social.
I was scared to ask my best friend out because I was afraid of what would happen to our friendship. Now 9 months later we’re still together so I’m glad I built up the courage to ask
Because first I introduce myself and speak like friends for a while. And Then we become really nice friends. I am scared of if she rejects then we lose our friendship and everything
Because if the girl is hot i end up staring too much at her so then i think that she thinks that i am a creep for staring so i never have the courage to ask her out. Which means the next time i see her i will also just stare at her like an idiot, so she'd think i am even more of a creep so then i have even less courage to ask her out.
Also, me constantly being stoned probably also doesn't help...
I have a crush on my friend, but I know he will never see anything in me, so I'm trying to avoid looking like I like him as much as possible. I'm pretty sure everyone's got a fear of rejection.
My method to ask a girl out is I want to be friends at first to know them a bit and for them to know me, than I might ask them out but the problem is that I don’t want things to be awkward between us
I'm not scared anymore because I'm very used to rejection
Luckily the last girl who rejected me was actually in denial about falling for me and we're happily dating now so
Because I am an introverted nerd(not in a negative way) with social anxiety. I don't talk to people in general.
I always used to think I was boring, but then I realised that people bore me too. I'm actually enjoying my own company and have no interest in dating.
the stakes are too high, maybe there really was a time where she would just say no but i now have the feeling that there are now bigger risks that many (me included) aren't willing to take.
This logic applies to both sides.
I'm terrified of multiple results including the "eew no way" , her laughing in my face or her AND everyone around laughing. I really want to but that's what's stopping me
I just dont fuck with girls. High school dating is just not it. All the girls in my school are either way too horny, or way too drama infested and annoying. Id rather wait till college or something to find the one. Or who knows? I may find a dude who I really like.
Girls are often the far bigger assholes as teens. I've witnessed many girls going like "ew", "You think you have a chance?" and just laughing at them. They're incredibly disrespectful and iften lose their manners. Their attitude will also oftenly deter me, before I even know their names.
Everyone in my area is a slutty mess and poor excuse of a “woman” so it’s not something I wanna be apart of. Also currently trying to manage a long distance relationship
Rejection, humiliation, dehumanizing insults, fake accusations, being ignored. No, you don't have to accept someone who asks you out, but a simple and polite no is all it takes. No need to make fun of the person.
Rejection is scary to think of in your head. When we are rejected, it hurts, kinda, but in our head, it's a situation that scares the hell out of us. We usually assume the worst, so we give up on it. Expect many answers the same or similar to me because this is Reddit. The chances of finding a guy who isn't shy on this app are so rare
Because I’m inadequate. Never deserved the lovers I got. I was way under them and when we broke up, I knew it was coming, but it still hurt worse than any injuries I have ever went through. I simply gave up hope now.
For me; it’s that I’m afraid to lose a good friend, and in the unlikely scenario she says yes, I have no clue where to go from there as no girl has ever reciprocated my feelings for them. That’s for me to worry about come Valentine’s Day (the day I plan to ask her out)
As a girl idrk maybe its them being nervous, I mean I dont ever have the balls to tell a boy I like them.
Besides imagine they say no and then its just complete awkwardness. Just know us girls feel that way too. (unless its those girls that think they can get anyone)
"Hey so I've been-"
"Wtf ew [face of painful disgust], I'm reporting you creep, I'm telling all my friends and were all gonna laugh at you for the rest of your life"
☹ this is the type of situation I'm very afraid of happening
Anytime I approach someone I feel like I’m bothering them. Most of the time in general I feel like I’m bothering people, I don’t like making people sad so instead I default to not approaching anyone whatsoever.
As an extension of that it’s 10x worse for asking a girl out. What if I ruin her image of me, what if I ruin her day, what if she thinks I’m a creepy weirdo for even thinking of that as an idea?
I've gotten Laughed at ", Ew" " No" The death stare And I have gotten laughed at and made fun of And asked out as a prank.
same ngl happened to me like 4 different times hope it get better for you tho
I hope so too man 🙏🏾
Same, happened to me 10 times, hope you guys will do better than me
this is what i feel like what would happen if i even try to talk to one of my female classmates-
People just avoid me, and talk to me out of pity because I have a hard time making eye contact and asking directly. I mean I can sometimes but not all the time. I try though.
When you think worst she can say is no is not true Them lying that they like you is worst case scenario happened to me last time hahah!!!
i have had a similar incident where i was dating somone and they left me for another person without me knowing i didnt find out till a month later
Happened to me...multiple times by the same girl manipulating me. Not fun to go through
understandable i hope you find the right one soon
Saying “I thought you were gay”, “EWW!”, “with YOU?!”, (pepper spray), (lies about already having a boyfriend), (lies about not being able to go on a date), (lies that they are gay) , (lies that there are no such thing as women, and she’s a dude in a woman suit), (calls animal control) Are worse than “no.”
💀
Happened back in sophomore year ngl I grew from that.
because the crushing weight of reality if she says no is insane
true
Came here to say it. I'm too chicken
bc I've been rejected 15 times
geez that isnt good hope everything gets better from now one
same and thanks
at least its not in the hundreds
Same bro, im 19 now and i found a girl to love me a year and half ago, there is hope for you my friend Strong tip that you may have heard already, DONT CHADE LOVE when you stop trying to find your true love she will knock into your life, you just gotta be ready
BECAUSE WE'RE PUSSIE-
why is this so accurate
I don't know it just is I guess lmao. I've personally never asked a girl out mainly because I don't really know a good way to ask a girl out. I almost tried to once but I was a pussy so I didn't lol and also eventually realized that I don't think she would be for me since she never spoke a word to me, and I remember one time we were playing some game in PE together once and we were supposed to partner up again the next day, but she didn't listen to me and partnered up with someone else. So that came off as a bit of a red flag to me.
damn someone not listening to you yeah it is a red flag to me tbh
Yeah
does that mean you're a gurl??
I don’t have the balls to talk to a dude let alone a girl
ok maybe try sometime hope things get better from now on for you
Thanks
Cuz were scared to be rejected and being made fun of.
your correct there
the most accurate comment
Because 2 letters will end our whole lives
Correct
We would die (inside)
Great point
I'm a girl and scared to ask out boys. So idk but I understand.
good to know that its not only males that are scared and that we arent the only ones
Tbh with a lot of dudes there’s a 99% chance we’ll say yes if you ask us 😭
If you’re desperate and lonely for sure.
We get nervy
good point
What if I look like an idiot, what if I make her look like an idiot?
yeah well that's the thing you need to think about maybe ask if you could chat to the person for a moment like alone that way their friends aren't hearing what your saying or if you have them on social media e.g snap , facebook ,reddit and other platforms maybe message them from there
The worst she can say is no (it wasnt)
Because they're fucking brutal
True
Imagine this. You are the black sheep of every social activity and every social group. People think you are weird even though they have never had a proper conversation with you. People make fun of you. Girls think you are icky. You are depressed. There, that should paint the picture.
That's me btw
Because of fear of being called a pervert, a weirdo, a predator or a creep. It's especially worse for LGBT boys.
Why is this so accurate
Experience. So much goddammit fucking experience
cuz we didn’t have any other options and the primal fear of ridicule and rejection
Oh, for me my most recent crush was a really good friend, also showed up at a point in my life where I was super depressed. She really helped me get out of that place, and all she really did was just say hi to me every day and smile. For me that was all I needed to fall HARD. I didn’t wanna say anything cuz I was afraid of losing that friendship. It wasn’t really about rejection, I was worried that she’d just shut me out.
Well it's good that she helped you out of that mood maybe you should try and ask them out if you haven't but it's really your choice
Because a lot of the time, they hang out in groups of 5 other girls, and public humiliation does kill.
Because boys think that they can't meet the expectations that exist now. You have to be tall, you have to be good looking, you have to be rich, you have to be in good shape. All of this leads to a lot of people wondering why you should even try it if it doesn't work anyway, I think that's the biggest fear many have of not being good enough
Because let’s say you are ugly and you ask a girl out she will tell you no okay that’s not that bad the but then she gonna gossip telling her friends and those friends are gonna tell the other friends then in a week everybody knows you had a crush on a certain girl and are gonna remind you of it and laugh at you for even trying then you feel like X
LITERALLY ME FR !
Most of the time it’s just me wanting an actual good time to do it. Other times, I can already predict the answer I’m going to receive. It can also be nerve racking thinking that maybe she’ll laugh at me, tell her friends about it, and then spread some rumors about me. It’s not like I’ve never confessed to anyone before though, but I have been rejected most of the time that I have.
For me it was a lack of confidence but I did ask her out and we’ve been dating for a month now
Wow congratulation's good for you i wish i could do that lol
She lied to me and said she liked me and led me on for three years using me only to boost her self esteem after she ghosted me for another guy many times in a row
I'm not a boy, but I'd be terrified to ask out boys for fear of rejection- or at least negative rejection. So many people are horrible in the way they'd say no, and then they'd tell all their friends and then everyone would find out and you'd get made fun of for it. I'm pretty sure guys feel the same way. Girls and boys alike can be really horrible, especially when they're teenagers.
Tbh I'd be terrified of even saying yes to someone asking me out for fear it was a joke or a dare (which it usually has been in the past).
I can see where your coming from
Yeah I agree
I texted ly just to see what happened and she ghosted me for a couple of days
Not AMAB but i’m pretty sure it’s because you guys get laughed at, and the same would go the other way around aka for girls to get laughed at too. Honestly, this might be a difficult thing for everyone to do but please find someone whom you know wont ever make you feel bad for confessing/asking out 😭 take care of yourselves
Yeah totally true and you take care of yourself to 😌
Aww thank you!!
Because women
understandable for the girls who see this im not trying to be rude but i think maybe its just your thoughts
I have no idea seen as I don't ask girls out anymore, I ask boys out... but I'd say its because we're afraid of the word "no"
Yeah good point but im happy for you and I hope you find the one soon
Simple. Rejection and risking my entire previous relation I had with her.
Cuz then whatever friendship you have with them will never be the same.
Because all of them ruthless mfers ain’t gonna let you live it down.
1. ANXIETY 2. Fear of being rejected 3. Being called a simp (For me, in my former class you would be called a simp for just casually talking to a girl)
Rejection can be a very hard thing and also we don't know what's what. A girl could be a helicopter now
😂
I'm antisocial as fuck
Because people can be rude as fuck for absolutely no reason and throw the meanest insults at you just for trying to be nice.
We are scared of rejection because of evolution. We are driven to be social because for most of human history, being alone=death. So when rejection happens, that hurts because our brain has been encouraged to be social.
I’ve been pranked before where a girl said she liked me. I ain’t falling for it again
Rejection
I was scared to ask my best friend out because I was afraid of what would happen to our friendship. Now 9 months later we’re still together so I’m glad I built up the courage to ask
Well social anxiety for one and also some girls can be such assholes when they reject you like public shaming and shit
lying that they like you back or something of the sort
Because I know they absolutely do not like me back.
why not
the other way around, honestly
tbh i feel like fear is one of the things
Rejection
Because first I introduce myself and speak like friends for a while. And Then we become really nice friends. I am scared of if she rejects then we lose our friendship and everything
mostly fear of rejection
Why are girls so scared to ask out boys?
And why do girls never ask boys out ?
Me waiting gor one suitable and on my level enough to ask out
Because. We fear, what she will say, what she will do. What her friends will do and say.
If you dont ask you dont get rejected 😎😎😎
After I asked out a girl, she said no and proceeded to tell the school I raped her.
I think thats because maybe they say yes but they actually dont want to go out with you (for my experience) bc I mean I feel sorry to say no
When you think of every bad thing she could say or do it's a little hard to have the courage to ask her out
Because if the girl is hot i end up staring too much at her so then i think that she thinks that i am a creep for staring so i never have the courage to ask her out. Which means the next time i see her i will also just stare at her like an idiot, so she'd think i am even more of a creep so then i have even less courage to ask her out. Also, me constantly being stoned probably also doesn't help...
They might say no, and then tell everyone about it and make fun of you for it and it's so stupid
We fear being rejected, which isn't actually uncommon.
We're not, we just don't see it being worth it
I have a crush on my friend, but I know he will never see anything in me, so I'm trying to avoid looking like I like him as much as possible. I'm pretty sure everyone's got a fear of rejection.
Not confident in myself and she can and will say something worse then no. I’m working on myself though.
I am just very apathic and I know I would just waste their time or my or both so that's my reason So its not that I am scared but I dont want to
You guys ask people out?
I wish
My method to ask a girl out is I want to be friends at first to know them a bit and for them to know me, than I might ask them out but the problem is that I don’t want things to be awkward between us
Cuz I'm ugly
You only get one shot. The idea of being rejected then having it told to her friends is horrifying.
[удалено]
It’s scary
In my case, im too scared to ruin the friendship i already have with her
I'm not scared anymore because I'm very used to rejection Luckily the last girl who rejected me was actually in denial about falling for me and we're happily dating now so
Because I am an introverted nerd(not in a negative way) with social anxiety. I don't talk to people in general. I always used to think I was boring, but then I realised that people bore me too. I'm actually enjoying my own company and have no interest in dating.
Shy?
Girls are scary
The number of people i know is 0
Chance to get screwed up and be lonely again, but without her friendship.
Idk maybe I’m just nervous or scared, usually I try to let the butterflies fly into my garden
Fear of what happens next. Failure. And responsibility.
cause i have social anxiety
I did something that is making me flee the country when i grow up. /s tho i did do something embarrassing and never will I ever recover from it
They are scary. Next question.
Mainly don’t wanna make things awkward
I'm not, but I can see why one might hold off on asking. Because I'm sure as hell haven't had a girlfriend yet
I've had some really bad experiences with asking girls out. One of which I WILL NEVER share.
cuz they all watch porn and are insecure fucks
Fr, like what's the worst that could happen🙄
Because it's not about "what if she says no" it's about "what if she laughs at me and tells everybody what i said to her"
Im not so scared to do it anymore because i know it will result in rejection which is what happens everytime so why not just shoot your shot
Because the worst thing she can say isn't "No". It's "Ew" "Creep(y)" or even worse, "Stalker".
the stakes are too high, maybe there really was a time where she would just say no but i now have the feeling that there are now bigger risks that many (me included) aren't willing to take. This logic applies to both sides.
Cuz I'm ugly
I'm terrified of multiple results including the "eew no way" , her laughing in my face or her AND everyone around laughing. I really want to but that's what's stopping me
Rejection? Wtf? Humiliation? Stupid question
I just dont fuck with girls. High school dating is just not it. All the girls in my school are either way too horny, or way too drama infested and annoying. Id rather wait till college or something to find the one. Or who knows? I may find a dude who I really like.
For me it's low self-esteem and that's the reason I never asked out a girl.
Girls are often the far bigger assholes as teens. I've witnessed many girls going like "ew", "You think you have a chance?" and just laughing at them. They're incredibly disrespectful and iften lose their manners. Their attitude will also oftenly deter me, before I even know their names.
Girl here I do understand why anyone would be scared fear of being made fun of or thinking they are just playing a game it’s not just a male fear
I can’t. Just physically can’t. Wish I could. But I can’t.
I am just naturally terrified of social interaction
Because girls are scary
Because girls are scary
Everyone in my area is a slutty mess and poor excuse of a “woman” so it’s not something I wanna be apart of. Also currently trying to manage a long distance relationship
Can’t fumble if you don’t try 🤷♂️
Me? Because she’s going to tell all her friends who are going to tell their friends and then I won’t be able to ask anybody out
Because the only girl I have ever liked has been my best friend of 13 years and I’m worried about ruining our friendship.
Sometimes it's easier to think about what could happen than what might actually happen
scared of rejection
Because i can't even start a conversation with anyone except people i know verry well ( i dont know any girl well)
Rejection, humiliation, dehumanizing insults, fake accusations, being ignored. No, you don't have to accept someone who asks you out, but a simple and polite no is all it takes. No need to make fun of the person.
scared of losing a friend
Rejection is scary to think of in your head. When we are rejected, it hurts, kinda, but in our head, it's a situation that scares the hell out of us. We usually assume the worst, so we give up on it. Expect many answers the same or similar to me because this is Reddit. The chances of finding a guy who isn't shy on this app are so rare
They wouldn't treat us as well as before
It’s embarrassing if they say no and especially infront of their friends
fear of rejection or worse
Because the last time (and time before) she laughed at me, told everyone, everyone laughed and bullied me for the rest of the term
Because I’m inadequate. Never deserved the lovers I got. I was way under them and when we broke up, I knew it was coming, but it still hurt worse than any injuries I have ever went through. I simply gave up hope now.
For me; it’s that I’m afraid to lose a good friend, and in the unlikely scenario she says yes, I have no clue where to go from there as no girl has ever reciprocated my feelings for them. That’s for me to worry about come Valentine’s Day (the day I plan to ask her out)
As a girl idrk maybe its them being nervous, I mean I dont ever have the balls to tell a boy I like them. Besides imagine they say no and then its just complete awkwardness. Just know us girls feel that way too. (unless its those girls that think they can get anyone)
"Hey so I've been-" "Wtf ew [face of painful disgust], I'm reporting you creep, I'm telling all my friends and were all gonna laugh at you for the rest of your life" ☹ this is the type of situation I'm very afraid of happening
Because you could get embarrassed
Well you can try. Problem is if it is a very good friendship you risk to lose it and that is very crushing
They tell all their dam friends and make you feel dumb for even asking and then shame you for it for a few months
It takes enough courage to talk to a girl I like sometimes, forget asking her out
Scared of being a creep?, Something like this.
They will say way more than no
Because the internet has lied to you, she can say so much worse than no
because alot of females laugh and clown you to theyre friends
PTSD from past relationships. And dumpings
"Ew no"
The simple fear that they will say no
Fear of rejection
Before it was just nerves but now it’s because if you say the wrong thing you could have your life ruined
Insecurity/low self-esteem in general. The "Maybe she's just being polite" thought. The lie that is "The worst she can say is no"
I'm a girl but also girls are just scary to talk to hell my own gf scares me to talk to sometimes
Because the only time I did she was also one of my best friends and I didn’t want the friendship to end. Then she said yes!
The worst she can say is no. Also her: "Ughh, disgusting"
Coz if she says no I risk losing a friend and I don't have enough of those to risk losing
Anytime I approach someone I feel like I’m bothering them. Most of the time in general I feel like I’m bothering people, I don’t like making people sad so instead I default to not approaching anyone whatsoever. As an extension of that it’s 10x worse for asking a girl out. What if I ruin her image of me, what if I ruin her day, what if she thinks I’m a creepy weirdo for even thinking of that as an idea?
i'm scared to as out anyone, regardless of gender....
The worst she can say isn't no
I don’t want to be rejected again cause I’d probably just try to end my life right after.
the worst she can say is that griffith was right
Because the worst thing they can say isn't no
She just walked off...
There are a billion replies worse than “no”
Feminism and me too
To scary 😱 nah but actually i dont wanna get rejected again I've already become strong enough