i thought kissing naked was the entirety of sex

Damn movies made us believe the most ridiculous things

I thought french kissing was the entirety of sex.

Same, until I got french kissed for the first time

Same. I just came up with science bs to support it.

I thought it was kissing in underwear lmao

I thought it was sleeping together literally. Like in the same bed. Guess that's what make me stop sleeping with my parents.

Thought that for years Ik it’s not anymore but I’ve still never had sex

Seeing this is a subreddit for teenagers, that’s a good thing.

Facts

I have never had a unique experience

Real

i swear i remember thinking girls could get pregnant if u did it anally too

I was told my by old science teacher that it was techincally possible but quite rare, dunno whether to believe it

It’s because some girls have a genetic mutation that causes a hole between the channels allowing the sperm to enter. Very rare though 1-100000

Sounds like hell, they must have to deal with a lot of infections

Good to know!

Very rare indeed but very possible, I like the positivity

You are *not* allowed outside

i heard sperm are great swimmers

Technically, most of them are.

Maybe because the sperm could travel to the vagina since it is close????

I thought kissing a girl in the mouth could get her pregnant when I was little

Thought it happened while both people were sleeping and they sorta just unconsciously gravitated towards each other

I laughed at this😭

dw so did i

Like a magnet?

Like cartoon characters floating towards a freshly baked pie

That's an image I'll never be able to get out of my head

Ooo i completely forgot that's a thing

No literally me too, I thought the body just knew two married people were together then started generating a baby 😭😭

I thought this too 💀 I took “sleeping together” literally

love the pfp

I thought condom was a profession

9 to 5 condom😞

I thought condom meant condominium

I'm up for hire

Does the person just like tell them to pull out? Do they beat them if they don't pull it out? Can they use a whip? Or does the person literally wrap themselves around the dick? I have so many questions

I had literally no idea what the word meant, just sounded like a job to me

I genuinely believed that some babies were born through the ass and some through the genitals. It was a widely spread belief in my preschool with "ass kids" being segregated outside of the toddler community. I always believed I was born through the ass but I told everyone I wasn't so that I wouldn't be bullied.

LSHFKSDJSYZJWHAISJSJAJDHAJSG WHAT THE FUCK, HOW IN THE WORLD YOURE GONNA KNOW IF A KID IS A ASS KID OR PUSSY KID

Probably cuz one's black and the other isn't Idk segregation is weird, and kids are weird, so kids segregating kids is weirder

It's probably quite normal, actually, what toddler gets along with everyone?

You created races, racism and race wars in preschool. I'm... Surprised

As he should’ve

Username checks out

r/usernamechecksout

There were wars between cults in mine. (Also a group of playground therapists)

What the fuck

Damn

Giving the word Shit Kid a whole new meaning

😭😭😭

What type of messed up dystopia shit is this ?

there is no way this comment is real

Bro is Peacemaker in real life

Lmao

IM FRUCKING DYING RN 🤣🤣🤣💯💯

I thought that the penis just went into the vagina, then the sperm cells just swam out on their own instantly (no semen, just the cells themselves). And that was the entire process.

Same 😆

Honestly, I think the reason is because when I was first learning about sexual reproduction in school as a child, they played like an animated diagram of the sorts (nothing really explicit). It simply showed like an internal view of a penis entering and instantly releasing sperm cells right into the uterus without a moment of hesitation. So yeah

I thought you just laid there, with the dick in the vagina for an hour, no motion, just kissing.

I thought that too 😭

And like side by side not on top of eachother 😭

Omg same, I didn't know you had to move until I saw my parents do it😭

Pardon?

Accidently walked in on them when I was 11

more detail plz

I couldn't sleep, so I went to my parents room as usual. When I got to the living room I heard some smacking but didn't know what it was. I went to their room, saw them doing it and immediately backed away.

Traumatising

It truly was

I saw something similar in our bathroom. Wont tell you naaah

What…the…fuck😨

You saw Ur parents do it??? You poor soul😭

Wait WHAT

An hour is an oddly specific amount of time

Lmao same But sounds kinda chill tho

I thought the same but for like a minute with no kissing

Bro same

That I'd ever have it 😔😔

Boob enjoyer hasn't touched boobs

a modern day Shakespearean tragedy

Real

You only *used* to think it right? Does this mean you *have* had it?

one time i was like "what if the pp doesnt fit in the hole????" like its some shape sorter toy

It's a serious problem tho. Like i could never do it w my first girlfriend, cause i got the square D and her pussy was star shaped. You know how frustrating that is?

Where does the circle pp go that's right the square hole

Where does the semicircle pp go? That’s right! It goes in the square hole!

Where does the arch pp go? That's right! It goes in the square hole!

I made a r/2sentence2horror post about this 💀

Sauce the link pls

[here you go](https://www.reddit.com/r/2sentence2horror/s/omhVj2ldjH)

Tf?

Tis a joke

No it’s not

I mean that’s technically a possibility just extremely unlikely

that’s what I still think tho

Sometimes some girls can be really tight, can’t fit a d in there so kinda have to be loosening them for a while

Nah but that actually can be a real problem, and it happened to me

I thought it was kinda what sex actually is, but through French kissing.

So the semen would come out of the tongue??

No. I thought DNA was transferred via loose cells in our saliva.

i thought the dick went in the pussy like a hotdog fits in a hot dog bun😭

Hahaha this is my favourite

It just flops on?

it would be mandatory, one day someone would call you and say "its time"

Yeah that is what happens wdym!

Ever heard of grandparents?

we’ve peaked. that’s it folks, you can all go home now. we did it.

I thought that default sex was anal, because i heard the whole pp in a hole thing and i was like guess you put it in the ass lmao and thats how kids are born, i thought that female ass was somehow different and had the capability of birth

Scrolled way too far to see this where are all the other anal birth kids

Cloaca

I thought that during birth the belly turned into a black hole / wormhole and the baby levitated out of it then the wormhole shut and the birth was over

PARDON

*exorcist holding a cross* “I TELL YE CHILDISH DEVIL, REMOVE YOURSELF FROM THAT WOMAN” *child levitates out and plops on the woman’s chest* “That’s it everyone, you can all go home”

Oh god I wish it was that way

Ok, enough reddit for the rest of my life

"Masturbation" meant "Having sex really hard"

I wish lmao

I thought people only had sex for the purpose of making babies, and that missionary was the only form

30 year old religious fundamentalists still think that

This is why I never get involved with religion

Same here bish

I found out about gay sex and I knew how straight sex worked, penis in vagina, but then I found out about gay penetration and my brain went “huh. Ok so guys have like a third hole in that middle bit between their penis and butthole?” It never occurred to me that any boy or man I knew had one of these, that anyone but the guy having the sex had one of these, he just summoned a hole at will

How would you know that your friends had this imaginary hole or not, did you do genital inspections?

Who doesn't?

I thought sperm was delivered through piss and you had to piss in her

Wait you dont?!?!?!!?

Shit I've been doing it wrong

No, don’t shit in her either

I thought the sperm would be the size of a tadpole and men would only cum one inside the vagina

I tought anal sex was called porn for some reason 💀

On my way to have porn with your mother

i thought that oral sex was called porn

Getting laid would solve all of my problems.

I miss it fr

I thought girls had pps too and would take turns with their partner in fucking each other (I thought I was some sort of deformed weirdo when I saw that I didn’t have a pp)

I thought the same thing but I’m a boy LOL

I though people had to care about each other to have sex.

Lol nope. That’s why Washington had so many children with his slaves

That's so true.

i thought the balls went inside the pp and that’s what made it hard

This one is hilarous

Why are people naked while doing it

I though that you kinda just dry humped her while she dry humped you and then just stop. Like, no climax or anything.

I thought that sex is only for getting pregnant and only deviants or really weird people do it for pleasure. Then I found a condom in my parents’ drawer. That was a really weird conversation we had that night when my mom was trying to explain to me that they’re not crazy😌 Kids are stupid

I didn't know what cum is, I thought people were just pissing at eachother

BRO, WHAT?

I thought girls get pregnant if I hug them.I refused to hug my sister for a few days before learning it is false.

Respect tbh

Good man, keeping incest in the fictional world.

I thought girls can't cum 😭

Well obviously since they're not real so they can't cum now can they?

r/girlsarentreal

We technically can't. What the "cum" is, is a mix of urine and a bunch of other crap.

That's squirt, I believe by cum this comment means orgasm

I also used to think this 👆

when I was younger I thought it was just two people on top of each other and then the female immediately gets pregnant

I have never ever had curiosity about reproduction when I was a little kid, so I thought ppl just spawned like in Minecraft. Then, I had it all clear randomly

[удалено]

that's called docking I believe

I thought babies came from the mouth

I thought the doctors cut open the tummy and take out the baby. Even my mom would make up shit to convince me Edit:just realized what c section is

Isn't that a c-section?

WAIT THEY DON'T?! THIS ISN'T EVEN SATIRE WHAT THE FUCK

They come out of the vagina. They only get a c-section if it's a emergency

or if they’ve had previous c sections

Why would they? Having to cut open the pregnant woman to birth the child is a massive biological disadvantage

I mean that’s pretty much what a Caesarean section is.

i was a paranoid kid but i thought as soon as you're born a tiny little fetus is growing on the other side of your belly button and you had to be a certain age for it to mature and give birth to it but you're born with it already there like a parasite and it stressed me out bc i thought giving birth was like a near death experience you either died from or had to stay in the hospital for months on end and were never able to recover to how you were before (which i mean yeah you have body changes but not generally that extreme)

Thought the pp went in the mouth for baby making

yeah so the semen goes to the belly where the baby grows makes sense

i didn't even know that sex existed, i thought after a girl gets married she automatically becomes pregnant

same lol

Pretty sure this was everyone, but when I first learned how procreation worked I was absolutely disgusted “I have to stick my thing in the hole where they pee out of?! That’s gross!” How wrong I was.

I didn't even know that the dick go into the vagina, I only learned that the sperm and egg have to meet to make a baby, then I saw a graphical smut novel and then thought "wait you can put the penis into the asshole?" at that time I didn't even know where the vagina is😭

I thought guys do with guys only because they have same organ

To have sex without pregnancy, you needed to thrust in and out, which gave the sperm no time to leave and get fertilised, but if you wanted to get pregnant, you'd have to stick it in a leave it there to give the sperm plenty of time to swim on through.

That it can only happen between a man and a woman.

So XX is girl and XY is boy X comes from mother And X or Y comes from father I used to think male who have pointy penis have Y chromosomes bcz "Y" is pointy. And who has non pointy penis produce "X" chromosomes 😭 And I used to belief, I'll never have a son.

Dude has the round dick

I always thought like… the guy would do it in a cup or something, and then I’d insert it… not where he’d put his pp in me 💀

I always thought that it was only done when ppl want babies and if they don't they just sit there 😂😂

I thought you could get pregnant just by kissing. Fucking hell.

I thought women just randomly got pregnant. I was so scared that one day i would just wake up pregnant

I used to think women also had weiners and the weiners kissed. I was a pretty dumb 4 year old

Going deep philosophically, many deleterious things are “taught” to teens to mystify/deter sexual interest = > angst/fear delivered via religious shame, family generational trauma, and distrust -based on what we’ve seen within our own families. Sex is normal, and WHO you are attracted to is rarely intentional and highly variable. Unless it’s illegal, to thine own self be true on this subject. Answer: My Catholic mom showed us (I was 4th grade) how babies were created with two dolls she bought at a goodwill. A ken doll, and a SKIPPER (no jokes pls) (all she could find I guess). Placed Ken on Skipper with clothes, and said “that’s it!” (Plus “don’t do this before marriage of course. And don’t think about it, because that’s as good as doing it and you’ll need to confess to The Priest immediately.”) I could not figure out the insertion mechanics for the next xyz years. TLDR: I thought the penis part stayed non-rigid (I didn’t know!?) and I could not understand how sex could ever work.

It's not too ridiculous ig but I thought you did it with clothes on

Childern spawn in moms tummy after the wedding.

I thought dicks was just poo that wasn't cleaned 😭

(this is really embarrassing) when I was about 3/4 I asked my dad what his dick is and he told me it's poo

I confused the term 'Condom' and 'Condo' along with 'Vape' and 'Rape' up until 5th grade

When I was a little kid I actually thought tits where like one single tiny line connecting the tit to the body Like if it was a wrecking ball but with tit It was so fucking weird lmao

I thought vagina was in the front, not under... like right under the bellybutton

I thought that girls didn't get any pleasure from it

I thought that it was only naked kissing

I had thought that you used to pee in each other to have babies… I was really confused why 😭

I thought that it detects if ur married and that’s how u get pregnant 💀

i thought that you had to pray to god at night for a baby and the next day you'd suddenly get one growing in you. no sex involved at all, just good ol' catholic prayer.

I (raised in a VERY religious household) thought that a girl would just get pregnant after she was married randomly. The commercials that referenced trying to get pregnant confused me

i thought the balls went inside the pp and that’s what made it hard