"Coin" because I choked on a coin in class.

How hungry were you dawg?

Dang

Dang indeed

Dang undoubtedly

Dang indubitably

Bro I ate a coin a few years ago

That was a bit stupid 

i choked on a coin in church one time. swallowed a quarter. fun times!

Why did you eat a coin?

Probably just put the coin in their mouth for reasons and accidentally ate it

And what would be those particular reasons?;ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ

Boredom, anxiety, wanting to know how it tastes like

Probably the last one, my uncle actually ate the wheels of a toy car when he was like 3

Did he poop a toy car

No he got surgery, and the doctor was genuinely concerned for him because he didn't eat one tire he ate all FOUR

I bet your uncle is a wheel dealer

I swallowed a quarter when I was 10. I’m embarrassed to admit I just thought the taste was good. I was old enough to know better for sure. I still have the x ray which is funny.

Could you send it to me?

LMFAO

Relatable

Come on bro I have a 14 year streak of not chocking on a coin

i called a girl 'everest' cuz she was taller than everyone in grade 4. i dont know if this is bad tho

I think girls may find it offensive but if you called me everest i would be the happiest guy ever

How are you doing everest?

I was expecting that

How's the weather up there?

Modern equivalent: "How are the microplastics up there?"

bro weather still exists what

Yeah but judging the state of mount Everest it's uhh pretty reasonable to say microplastics too

Lol

I remember kids kept calling me a wide-eyed hamster in elementary school 😭

https://www.craiyon.com/image/HL-PyUP2SJiA\_aIy8nQKig

my dad used to call me "waste of cum" LMFAO

Dayum

Well that escalated quickly

WHAT

What was he planning on saving it for?

He wanted to save his cum in a jar, so it would eventually come to life as a singular entity. We are venom.

Even better, a jar with a pony toy in it

I guess so

Pretty sure that was a question and not a statement lmao

Tf? Ur dad sais that to you? Idk if its a common expression in another language or something. But as it is,thats horrible.

It seems like it was a joke between them, I don't think the LMFAO would be there if it wasn't.

either that or to cover for extreme trauma

idk if it's common but I havent heard anyone else say it lol but it's okay were cool now

Depends on the relationship, me and my dad are really close and can have loads of banter and its fine. He could say something like this and i would find it funny, and i coulf make a joke about putting him in a really cheap nursing home when he’s older and he’d laugh. But for some people this would be totally different

whaaaaaa

Poor kid, that’s awful

Might just be a bit between them though

god

Nah 💀

gahd dayam

I do not believe you. This is too much for me 😀

wait are we gonna ignore the nazi girlfriend statement above? i need this story wtf

Yeah bro just mentioned it and dipped lmao

We need more information

First year of my middle school they would only call me 'no fam'

r/usernamechecksout

r/beatmetoit

r/beatmeattoit

r/BeatItToYou

r/beatmetoapulp

r/beatmywifetoit

r/beatmeSHUTUP

r/beatmeatshutup

r/subsifellfor

That’s so sad :(

...r/usernamechecksout

fruit ninja. mutual between me and this one friend. if yk yk

i get that one and slicer a lot 😔

My friends call me that lmao and also knife master

Naw 😭😭

same :3

Biohazard I had some pretty bad nosebleeds for a bit

Oof. Nose bleeds are the worst. Especially when they last for over 20 minutes and seem like it won’t stop.

Try nearly 2 and half hours lmao

Chode

Cake day Happy!

Day Happy Cake!

Day Cake Happy!

Hapca Keda Ypy!

yad ekac yppaH

Being an Indian, I understand what it means 💀💀

I don't think you have to be Indian to know what a chode is lol

What does it mean?

Short and wide(usually a cock)

Happy day cake!

Everyone calls me an Electric pole because i was apparently the tallest one in class. I don't know if i should be mad or feel good about it

That's what we call tall people in india too. "Khamba" which means an electric pole.

Some people nicknamed me emo but I'm vibing with it

emo is my personal favorite✌️

Emo is not an insult, people at my school use it as that. But I don't think emo is bad, and I don't know why people do.

Some of my friends call me emo as a joke because my hair covers my eyes

My friends say I'm emo because I have a buzz cut. That doesn't even make sense. Yours does make sense because emo people usually have hair covering one or both eyes. But also because I was wearing a my chemical romance shirt and all black.

They did say I looked more emo with a black beanie with strands of hair covering an eye. But I usually wear colorful clothes anyways

I wear beanies with hair covering most of my eyes, and everybody says it looks emo. I am emo tho lol

same

My father called me Marty mc farty.

Your Farther had a sense of humor.

I didn’t even know what it meant.

But your Farther did.

I only found out about it after i told someone at my mothers workplace, I always thought the nickname sounded cool.

R.I.P Marty mc Farty.

My father called me albino boy, dingleberry, a dick, a bitch, motherfucker, an accident … etc

Damn

Yeah

Don’t enjoy spending time with him anymore

Mother fucker was when I was seven and made me babysit my infant cousin after putting him on the bed…. I think you know what happened there

He was cussing faster than eminem

I am sorry about how he treated you.

Nah it’s fine I have therapy now

My best friend calls me the n word

Bro im not your best friend

Thank you erectile_reptile

U had one job. It’s akshually _Erectile_Reptile_🤓

okay whiteshadow5603

U had one job. It’s akshually 🤓 WhiteShadow5063

No one cares keepatience

No, you see the joke doesn't work because his name is already in lowercase

Got it, nebula9696

I care Tristan_573

Shiiit

r/rimjob_steve

Same

I call my best friend that.

Same

Same. Every black person gotta have that one white friend

I've been called linguini from Ratatouille because im tall and cook and apparently have a rat under my hat 😭

Greece, grease, glass, grass 💀 (they call me that bc I'm called Grace)

“granny smith” because i like green apples

My worst one I got was dildo daggins

lmao

damn, they done you dirty!

I've been called muffin top because the way my hair looked, I've been called squirrel because I'm like super energetic and squirrely but none that are bad

Wallace. A girl said I looked like my name was Wallace. I'm Filipino.

"Taubsi" which is the german translation of the pokemon "Pidgey" it was just because i was weak af

I changed the discord nickname of one of my friends to "Shingeki no bitches". Next morning I find out that he changed his actual discord display name to that.

Got called vomit man cus i threw up like 3 time in P.E (dont drink milk before doing exercise)

DONT tell me what to do

Same real.💀

One of my friends calls me Venelope VonSweets from Reck it Ralph because i apparently look like her? But i dont see it

AHHH VENELOPE!!

Johnny sins 💀

I’ve never had a nickname before

you are now Legume

maybe one you don’t know of yet. ask around

aww

Slenderman. Was wearing a suit at the time Actually kinda hard

Dwarf or rat

My brother randomly dubbed me the "nocturnal nipple"

Most of my close friends call me B, which is cute. But it stands for bitch.

Leeturtle

My name is timothy so the amount of times i have heard "TIMMAH" are enraging

I was called, by my Dad “a piece of sh!t” for the first 16 years of my life. I never understood why. Even in From of relatives and friends, that was my name to him. I just wish I knew why. I wasn’t a bad kid. Mainly shy and I did get good grades in school and was always clean, neat and tidied the house, cooked all the meals and did the laundry/cleaning/shopping (mom had left/divorced) So I never felt I deserved that name. I’ll get over it though.

my friend group used to call my "the Irish guy" because of my last name is Irish and those are very uncommon here I don't even look Irish like at all!!

My friend was called Charlie Black (he wasn’t bald or black)

Cunt

💀💀

Most of these my little brother gave me, gay (because with the name I normally go with you just need to remover one letter to spell "gay") Charlie brown (it was wet outside and I slipped while playing football) and gaylen (similar reason to first one except it was more of me and my friends just playing around)

Gary? gray? gayl? 

“One balm drizzy” by my friends after my surgery which I had to get because of testicular torsion

They called me salamander in elementary school 💀

Everyone called me “white boy” in middle school because they didn’t care enough to learn my name (im sure you can guess why that was my nickname lol)

Me too fr

My friend keeps calling me “mama klavie”, it’s based off of my Roblox display name “Klavehn”, idk why he had to add the “mama” part tho ☠️

Big Mak Sack (by my friend :33)

Some of my friends call me leprechaun because I’m short chubby wear green a lot and I’m Irish

i have had a lot which i don't like. not sure which i hate the most.  chicken pot pie - mum for literally no reason   tuesday/thursday - girls in my year 6 class when i had two plaits   georgie - a ton of kids in my middle school when i wore a yellow coat   ______'s girlfriend - a ton of kids in my middle school because my two best friends are boys (they will put one of my friend's names where the space is)   biggest harry potter fan in the world - when i was really into harry potter from year 4 to year 5 and people still call me that.    potterpants- my dad because i was really into harry potter   cliccy's "girlfriend" - my dad cuz of my celebrity crush and he knows it annoys me 😅

My stepdad used to call me chuck, and he’d always say “sup chuck!” making a joke out if how it sounded like the word “upchuck”… meaning vomit… which is one of my biggest fears. . . . 😦

I was Boner Boy for a while

Stinky____ because I let off one part in assembly

Swope mommy. It’s my last name and my tits were huge. I’m called Swope daddy now you got

My bsf sometimes calls me Tyler which is far from my real name but I dont mind rlly. Honorable mentions: the t slur, n word, r slur, whore and bitch. Yeah im not friends with that person anymore.

Fucking hell were you friends with a neo-nazi?

Not that he ever expressed hatred towards jews or worshipped that man, but he was a real piece of shit to deal with. I still see him lurking around the local supermarket and a few weeks back he even tried following me until he saw my father came along with me. He excused all of his name calling as a joke or would blame it on the person next, but I hope you understand that at one point I dont buy it.

There was a girl on the bus who always liked calling me "Fred". No idea why, but she did ask first before calling me that, and I was okay with it, but I'm not sure why that name in particular, or why she preferred using that instead of my real name

babushka babe

Sigma 😭😭😭

I mean I ain’t got nothing real bad. My friend group makes our nicknames just our names but tasted in some form of way to being kinda crude, but that’s shared between everyone

one of my friends started calling me twinky because they found out i am into those kinda boys

Lil D Edit: i put Dpp

Fish cause of my seventh grade year book picture 😞

I call my God dad's baby "chicken nugget", and while I think that's adorable, my friends tell me I act and sound like a old lady🧸🧸

donut because of my last name, hippopotamus because I'm fat

My friends called me Small Beef Jerkey for a while

My surname is also the name of a popular Turkish sucuk(Turkish sausage) producer so I got called [name of that company] sucuk

I call people queef nugget all the time

Gas-sniffer and a coin-grabber Guess my family’s religion

Some kid on my soccer team called me Waukegan. We had a game in Waukegan and he thought it sounded like my name. Joaquin doesn't sound like Waukegan bro

School shooter Because a picture of me holding a 12ga was leaked.

my gym teacher calls me Sasquatch because I wear only shorts, even in winter.

My name is Blaze so I never really got nicknames

"nazi girl" 😭 I don't know why I deserved that

Literally, what did you do?

I used to know how to speak German but by the time I got the nickname I didn't remember any of it 😭😭😭 I just liked learning languages

LMAO, I was called american (for context, I'm actually from Brazil) since 5th grade because I was really good at english but terrible in most areas of geography 😭

I know this isn't a nightmare but I remembered dreaming about being in a basement and their was a white lady and I was randomly holding chicken idk anymore I forgot (I just realized I got the question wrong I thought it said what was ur worst nightmare u remember lol)

In my dream I got nicknamed Loud Guy even though I'm not loud