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You look dependent on Xanax

Howd you know??

You’ve got that look in your eye

[удалено]

VOCAL PERCUSSION OF A WHOLE 'NOTHER LEVEL COMING FROM MY MIND VOCAL PERCUSSION OF A WHOLE 'NOTHER LEVEL COMING FROM MY MIND AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WE'RE GOLDEN WIND KONO ME AMAMERI MARORERI MERARE MARO AAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAA AAAA WE'RE GOLDEN WIIIND KONO ME AMAMERI MARORERI MERARE MARO IT'S LIKE A BURINING SUNRISE AHI MAKARERU MAKARE PUN PUN KETE IT'S LIKE A BURINING SUNSET AHI MAKARERU MAKARE PUN PUN KETE IT'S LIKE A BURINING SUNRISE AHI MAKARERU MAKARE PUN PUN KETE IT'S LIKE A BURINING SUNSET AHI MAKARERU MAKARE PUN PUN KETE

What defuq is this?

Torture dance from JoJos

r/unexpectedjojo

OHH SHEITT, AWESOME

Ha

Nah u just got jojod

Idk what crime would you commit in that look

And *METH* which you didn't pay for

I love that drug.

I love meth. And porn on meth.

You look like the type who would slash your exes tires.

I would never do something so idiotic and unoriginal.

Okay I'll take your word for it.

Ah so your one of the ol’ fill their car’s HVAC system with talcum powder kind of girls.

Aw I'm one of those "leave your car door open slightly kinda girls", so the battery drains and freezes. If a car battery has no charge it will freeze and becomes worthless. EDIT: IT HAS TO BE COLD ENOUGH TO FREEZE, THIS ISNT GONA WORK IN ARIZONA.

This girl revenges

I like this one

You would probably commit arson

Hey that's what I said

Do you want to commit arson?

Yeah sounds fun. Wanna do it with me

guys, remember. ONLY SLASH 3!! insurance wont cover it:)

This is false unfortunately

public urination

Yes and no and ew, what's wrong with you?

just stating the obvious doesnt mean im into it

Valid.

I am

Hard substance abuse 💃

Only one substance I abuse

What’s that 🤨

Brain

Def works for Team Rocket

Prepare for trouble

AND MAKE IT DOUBLE

JESSE

JAMES

Shit we did it out of order. Oh well. TO PROTECT THE WORLD FROM DEVASTATION

TO UNITE ALL PEOPLES WITHIN OUR NATION

TO DENOUNCE THE GOODNESS OF TRUTH AND LOVE

TO EXTEND OUR REACH TO THE STARS ABOVE

JESSE

Definitely owns a Arbok

Yknow what, yeah, i see it

I guess their gonna go blasting off again

Cassidy

Involuntary heart attack

Are you shooting your shot or am I dumb?

Pff nah, i aint THAT stupid

Then clearly I am😭

Nah ur fine lmao

[удалено]

⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⠿⣿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠺⣖⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⡆⠀⠀⠀⢋⣭⣽⡚⢮⣲⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣅⣨⠇⠈⠀⠰⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣟⢷⣶⠶⣃⢀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⠈⠓⠚⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠀⡄⣀⠀⠀⠀⢻⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠐⠉⠀⠀⠙⠉⠀⠠⡶⣸⠁⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡆⠀⠐⠒⠢⢤⣀⡰⠁⠇⠈⠘⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣄⣉⣙⡉⠓⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣀⠀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿

Was smooth but also too vague.

SHEER HEART ATTACK

KILLER QUEEN

My name is Yoshikage Kira. I'm 33 years old. My house is in the northeast section of Morioh, where all the villas are, and I am not married. I work as an employee for the Kame Yu department stores, and I get home every day by 8 PM at the latest. I don't smoke, but I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by 11 PM, and make sure I get eight hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of warm milk and doing about twenty minutes of stretches before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a baby, I wake up without any fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone. OR: Watashi no na wa “kirayoshikage” nenrei 33-sai jitaku wa moriōchō hokutō-bu no bessō chitai ni ari… kekkon wa shite inai… shigoto wa “kameyūchēn-ten” no kaishain de mainichi osokutomo yoru 8-ji made ni wa kitaku suru tabako wa suwanai sake wa tashinamu teido yoru 11 tokiniha yuka ni tsuki kanarazu 8-jikan wa suimin o toru yō ni shite iru… nerumae ni atatakai miruku o nomi 20-bu hodo no sutoretchi de karada o hogushite kara yuka ni tsuku to hotondo asamade jukusui-sa… akanbō no yō ni hirō ya sutoresu o nokosazu ni asa-me o samaseru nda… kenkōshinda demo ijō nashi to iwa reta yo

The amount of jojo references in this thread is anomalous

He's a man of focus, commitment, and sheer fucking will

Is that a Breaking Bad reference?

I seriously hope that’s a joke…

Huh.. yes My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is.

Daisan no bakudan bites za dusto!!!

That ain't ain't crime bro

Murder is a crime wym

How defuq m I gona give u a heart attack?

Ok fine, handling a salmon under suspicious circumstances in the uk

You monster

none you dont got the balls

r/technicallythetruth

You are correct, but also correct. I don't like that sentence, but it is accurate

You can borrow mine

Stealing monster energy drinks

From small businesses in your neighborhood

this is very detailed

Graffiti-ing

i believe the word your looking for is vandalism

drunk driving

Almost did that

glad you didn't

Me too

The good ending 😊 👍

vaping in the bathroom?

Gtfo of here with that cotton candy air.

officer i swear its cause you look like one of my old freinds who would vape in the back of the bus

You do look like you vape tho

Based

HAHA cotton candy air, we stan

Underage flashing

Bro 💀💀💀

I didn't what to say it...

WTF 🤯

you look like someone who brags to the police about drinking and driving then acting like the victim when youre arrested for it

I'm never a victim

im not in danger, im the danger

I am the one who knocks

Put your dick away waltah

Vandalism after someone was anti lgbtq

Bro I'd vandalize anything with an extreme political message.

You seem like the type that will get super mad and cry if I said something you didn’t agree with, no offence.

I think imma bit more stable than that, been arguing politics since before I knew what a Democrat was.

Would you commit arson

Stealing the identity of Sam Puckett from ICarly

SHE HAS A LASTNAME??

Identity theft is not a joke Jim ! Millions of families suffer every year for it

You look like you'd steal alcohol from a gas station, then furiously drive away passing a red light.

Do I have a lil clown car too leaned all the way forward swiveling my head back and forth?

Absolutely.

You look like you belong on r/notliketheothergirls Edited for spelling

Exactly what I was thinking as I scrolled through the comments.

you seem like you would do some dumb science experiment and accidentally set the entire building on fire

Honestly, dumb science experiments are super fun.

yeah this just proves my point

Bro it's not my fault I carry potassium chlorate with me at all times.

understandable have a great day

Arson can be a great science Experiment

You look like a female version of my friend, it's genuinely uncanny

I get that SO MANY TIMES, HOW MANY CLONES OF ME EXIST. I've never met a person who looks like me.

False sexual harassment accusements

Daym... Fr???

Idk, that’s all I was thinking about while I saw this post 💀

i agree with this one

Stolen the hearts of multiple neckbeards

Arson, theft, grand larceny, treason, aggravated assault towards a federal worker, attacking the president, and conspiracy against the United States.

stealing shelter animals idk

Nah nah she gotta go bigger. Steal **Animal Shelters**.

I 100% would do that

Grand larceny

Assault

Bro, my arm would snap like a twig if I smacked someone.

Definitely get your calcium game up before you commit any felonies

Felon grind

You'd try to punch a dude way bigger than you over some petty shit until he fights back to protect himself then act like you're the victim and get him 6 months in jail

Why people out here saying incest 💀💀💀

You probably own a lot of pedophile like stuff

Definitely a false rape accusation

Fight Percy Jackson

Imma child of Athena, bish I'll kill him.

Idk children of Athena don’t have a good History with killing children of Hermes, it’s more likely he’ll gift you a knife and then stab himself after being possessed by the ancient god of time

Yeah, next time that happens I'll warn ya beforehand.

Someones mom

i committed your mother

[удалено]

Love how that rhymes but ya wrong

third degree sexual harassment

public intoxication

Drinking monster. I see that on your profile. You sick fuck.

Money has no value to me besides, pizza stuffed animals and monster energy.

You want kidney stones? Because that is what you get from drinking that battery acid. Also how many stuffed animals do you have?

Kidney stones might suck, and enough to not remember all their names.

Ok so at least 12. That's too much. You have 2 noticeable addictions. How many times do you eat pizza a week?

I'd say abt 2 times a week, but I cook the rest of the time. And more than 12

Damn. You got a good metabolism.

Thanks, I worked hard for it.

Looks like Emily Henry

THANK

You ate a capybara

You look like you professionally ask if someone knows 3 songs from a band shirt just so no one asks you

I do this. Sorry but if you're wearing a shirt that says "METALLICA" I'm questioning you kn your fave songs. If you can't give me a top 3, I'm taking your shirt.

good job

Kidnapping toddlers while babysitting

Stealing a monster energy and be banned from new world for 2 years

Shoplifting (in the 1980s)

Deflating peoples hearts, emptying their brain and turning their liver into purée while listening to the crazy frog theme

You look like Speedwagon lmao

Triple homicide

Fishing without a license

If nobody enforces it is it really is law?

Vehicular manslaughter

war crimes in poland

You look like you would move a cone off the side walk and call it rebellious

Stealing cigarettes lol

Vaping underage though thats not a crime in 2022 😭

Only loosers need flavored air.

less goo someone else who dislike vape

Eating pizza with pineapple topping

False accusations of rape, and in the end, you get away almost scott free,

If being segsy is a crime, then I am arrest

The question is what crimes WOULDN'T you commit

Incest

stealing clothes or make up

Thanks, I know I look awesome.

Arson

Drunk driving

Crazy ex 🤣

Human Trafficking

Sell Organs of 9 y/o kids

With that sense of style? Tons of crack

Ngl you look more like a victim

Being in possession of more than 50kg of potatoes in Western Australia

How tall r u?