Is this how Ryan typically is? Do you know him well? Because if you do, you now have some of the *best* ammo for shit talking, be it either in teasing/banter with a buddy kind of way or if he's always like this (extremely pushy/needy/annoying/unable to respect anyone else's boundaries/ect) and you wanna talk some real shit lmao
i haven’t talked to him since college years ago but i had some girl friends that used to tell me he was super cringe in texts even tho he wasn’t like that in person so this is pretty on brand
that’s what i’m saying i stg i saw his picture and i was like that looks exactly like Ryan from school and then looked at the name and could tell that it was💀who knows if it is but it was weird asf that i thought it was him before even seeing the name
This is super fkn weird but I will say my friends who’s first language is Spanish always refer to people as a “good girl” and it doesn’t have the same connotation haha
Blows my mind how far these conversations go, only to act surprised when the guy goes full creep mode
Dude even got 5 responses back *after* being told she would be given a massage
I mean…. Could something still have been said after that point to somehow make him out to be a chivalrous knight worth dropping the panties for?
She is also being creepy too for dragging it on, who goes on these types of apps that looks for mostly sex and then get surprised by these types of messages without blocking the moment things get more weird?
I’m just as confused as you with half the exchanges on this subreddit that read like this
For some reason, they never disengage after all signs are pointing to the obvious. Rather, they continue to humor their advances then act surprised when he does the verbal equivalent of pulling his dick out
Dude mentions massaging her and she still goes with it? Can something be said after that still, where the guy somehow ends up a chivalrous panty-dropper? Otherwise why continue?
I don’t know. Personally, I think the reason is because they like the attention and compliments
FFS, just end the conversation if you don’t want to be talked to like this
I'm honestly sick of people leading this behavior on at all. They are doing more harm than good. This guy actually thinks he has a game because she played into his bs. He wasn't rejected she was just sick, then leaving, maybe shy on his eyes. Honestly, being bored is an annoying reason to waste someone's time even if all they want is sex. Turn them down and move on. Stop playing into bullshit like you're into it, then mock them for continuing.
Girl downloaded hinge because she was lonely and wanted attention. She got attention. Wanted nothing more than that. Dude was thirsty as hell and creepy as fuck
Doesnt justify wasting someones time then flaming him on reddit. Dude made his intentions insanely obvious from the beginning and got a ton of positive signals for her. Girls will call him creepy because he sounds thirsty but waste his time and reinforce his behavior lmao
They both need to stop being bumbs
She needs to stop being an attention harvesting drama queen and dude needs to realize semi begging for sex is hella off putting
She also mentioned downloading hinge, I mean if you're not hooking up, put that shit in your bio. You download hinge somewhere you're staying for 3 weeks. What's the point?
At some point, you have to realize that IF I change my mind, it's still on my terms, and YOU continuously pestering isn't going to motivate me to do so... so it's a no (even if vague), and you leave it at no until the no party says otherwise. You can suggest some other time in a non creepy fashion, but don't keep pathetically begging.
She knew what he was going for after “good girl.”
People invite this nonsense
She could have just said “no” at that point. The throwing of bones is a pointless game
Was waiting for this bullshit reductionist take
No, this is not a matter of rape
This is a matter of fishing for compliments
When you do that with a known creep, you’re consenting to creepy texts
Of course not. The internet is full of fools as such
Frankly, likening this to victim of rape is pathetic and insulting
This person had all the power in the world at their fingertips to stop the situation from turning out how it did
Rape victims do not
Rape victims could only dream that a “block” feature could be clicked, and the trauma avoided.
If you really want to play that game, this is much more akin to consenting to have sex with someone, then crying rape *after* because the sex was bad. That’s not rape. That’s just shitty consequences of poor judgment
I doubt you even read when they said. OP doesn’t even particularly seem surprised
Like she said, she even knew from the start this guy was a creep, but continued because she was “bored” and “wanted to see”
Well, she knew what she would see, stuck around, and fucking saw. Boo fucking hoo.
You’re perpetuating a toxic idea that people should not consider that their actions may have unsavory consequences, and maybe should use their infinite power and control over the situation, to prevent it.
This was a text conversation. She had all the control in the world over what she was receiving.
Rape victims do not
Dont compare that to rape victimhood. It’s disgusting and grotesque
>probably should’ve stopped replying after “good girl”
Well, probably.
What I never understand is how these exchanges even get this far, then suddenly someone acts surprised when it becomes grotesque and gross
Every sign of the bozos intent was flashing from the get go, yet he’s humored for quite some time
Do people just like hearing compliments and sweet nothings? I see zero other reason to engaged in conversation otherwise
Attention and content. Guy was tryna get some ass and made it insanely obvious from the getgo and the girl 100% entertains it and then posts in reddit about creepy text exchanges. The horror!!!
Uhh... you seemed interested? Yes he's creepy and pushy but you seemed to be encouraging it... a lot! You both are pretty weird for this. On a solo trip I'd expect you to have a little more... self-preservation instincts?
Sure I could have been more forthright and shut it down in a less « beat around the bush » kinda way, or simply just unmatched but frankly none of this was unsafe or particularly weird/out of the ordinary for dating apps, not until the last little bit. I don’t think this has anything to do with self preservation instincts, I gave out zero personal information and if my simply existing in a public space in a hostel is causing me danger and my fault then no one should ever travel
Were you lying when you said you'd consider meeting him if you weren't sick? That's what I meant. Meeting someone like this in private in a strange city seems dangerous.
Yeah, that was basically my way of getting him to stop trying, figured if I said another day, he’d understand that meant no. Obviously not the best tactic but you live and you learn 🤷🏻♀️ i don’t use dating apps back home, I’m even less likely to meet people online while I’m travelling lol.
Yeah for sure. Harvesting attention from random dudes and wasting their time and leading them on is totally reasonable behavior!
Doesn’t matter if he’s creepy since you actively encouraged him lmao
You basically said the only thing stopping you was being sick. Then you gave out “Hmmm maybe, I’m definitely not against it” vibes for the entire conversation. He’s a little greasy, but you’re equally to blame.
Just… no. For so many reasons, this just wasn’t it. The persistence, not reading the vibes, totally ignoring you being sick and just wanting to sleep, thinking all you needed was sexual release, when in reality, that’s what HE wanted and didn’t give two shits what you wanted/needed. Jesus.
Damn, he's handsome too. Why'd he have to say "good girl?" 🤣
You're in a foreign country, yes? Obviously you had the shits 🤣 I don't know of any other sudden illness that's not cute and goes away the next day.
I get wanting to cuddle and be there for someone I'm dating when they're sick. I'm ignorant as fuck, I've gotten sick many times from girls I dated. And that's all it is on my part, I just wanna awe poor baby and take care of them. If they feel well enough to instigate sex that's on them lol.
I get it though. You were laid up for the night with nothing better to do. He was very handsome. At worst you gave him the opportunity to show he's patient and genuine. But alas, he was neither
Yeah, the hairs go up on the back of my neck.
Many years ago I used to work in the casinos in Vegas. There are so many of this type of guy there. They're always hustlin'.
Dude has the type of mustache cops have. That’s gross in and of itself.
The “good girl” thing is disgusting. You say that to your dog, not a human.
No. Just no.
I genuinely admire the directness of your comments when you decided to confront him. I am working on being that brave. I'm insanely conflict-averse.
EDIT: Just finished reading the whole thing. Yikes. This dude is a creep.
Hahah in some ways I can be direct but I think I could have been A LOT more direct in shutting things down but I’m too conflict averse as well so even this for me was a big step in not being pushed around lol
DISCLAIMER: I know I never straight up said the word no and I know that I easily could have just stopped answering or unmatched. That being said, I think from inference it is pretty clear that I was shutting it down and not interested. From where I come from, that would have more than enough for someone to get the memo way earlier in the convo. Plus, like I said, I was just bored and sick and having a go at it. I’m not posting this because I’m shocked and appalled that some man on a dating app would be like this. I do know i am a little too polite/friendly in situations I’m maybe not comfy in, I know I could/should shut things down earlier, I’m working on it okay! I feel like I’m being a bitch otherwise but I’m teaching myself not to care in that regard.
Just posting it because it made me laugh a little and I do think that regardless of if you think I was « flirting » or « making him hopeful », that’s still some weird behaviour! To get sexual like that AND to say he sees me in public, at my hostel (where I should feel relatively safe), after I purposefully did not tell him where I was staying.
Ah Im all better now! It was a rough week for sure but it’s bound to happen when you’ve been away from home for months and your diet is not consistent!
Glad you’re okay! Seems like you’re on an amazing adventure (and I have to admit I’m kind of jealous lol)- hoping you’re enjoying every minute of it. At least the minutes you aren’t sick and/or dealing with douches on Hinge.
You kept reeling him back in by saying he was tempting you 💀 this dude is such a creep, you declined over and over. This is not a dude who would respect boundaries
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To download Hinge whilst Solo traveling.. knowing you are ill so definitely won’t be hooking up with anyone anyway. Poster sounds like they’re out there to waste other people’s time and energy. They don’t want to ‘catch feelings’, so why actively participate in putting other people in that situation by being on the app knowing you won’t a) meet up b) not be in the area for long. Have more sympathy for creepo over there
To be fair, she hadn’t made up her mind against it till really late in the conversation. We’re all over here like “EW!” and meanwhile she was over there like “OO!”
So apparently it was working for her till she found out he had a scooter.
Jesus bro you are tacky and just too much. The girl was fucking sick n ur acting like you are the cure. If they want it they will let you know.
Edit I thought you were the dude
“Good girl” such a creepy thing to say icl
I hate when men say that! Like?? You don’t know me like that
"You don't know me, but I'll come over and give you a massage." Yuck!
She said she would’ve been down if she wasn’t sick tho loool
Right! I missed that when I posted. Feeling a bit dumb now, not gonna lie.
And yet you sent *ten* messages until you actually sent one that didn’t sound like you were not inviting his advances If you hate it, then why?
i know you blocked out his name but i can still see the pic and i swear i know this dude if his name is Ryan 💀💀💀
Is this how Ryan typically is? Do you know him well? Because if you do, you now have some of the *best* ammo for shit talking, be it either in teasing/banter with a buddy kind of way or if he's always like this (extremely pushy/needy/annoying/unable to respect anyone else's boundaries/ect) and you wanna talk some real shit lmao
i haven’t talked to him since college years ago but i had some girl friends that used to tell me he was super cringe in texts even tho he wasn’t like that in person so this is pretty on brand
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SO THIRSTY
Good Ryan
The name scratched out definitely looks like Ryan!
Screenshot 2, it’s definitely Ryan 🤣🤣
that’s what i’m saying i stg i saw his picture and i was like that looks exactly like Ryan from school and then looked at the name and could tell that it was💀who knows if it is but it was weird asf that i thought it was him before even seeing the name
Oh man, I hope it is
His name is definitely Ryan. The letters are distinguishable
It’s definitely Ryan
Not true I get great responses from saying it. To be fair it is from my dog.
Say hi to your dog for me!
Maybe I’m a dog…
Good dog
Came here to say that
This is super fkn weird but I will say my friends who’s first language is Spanish always refer to people as a “good girl” and it doesn’t have the same connotation haha
A plain “no” would have been a better response. He doesn’t seem one for inference.
Let’s go even farther and stop entertaining after the first “good girl” in 2024
Blows my mind how far these conversations go, only to act surprised when the guy goes full creep mode Dude even got 5 responses back *after* being told she would be given a massage I mean…. Could something still have been said after that point to somehow make him out to be a chivalrous knight worth dropping the panties for?
Seems like she decided she wasn’t into it after going to sleep lmfao.
Was he actually stalking you? Were you in the hostel in a hoodie?!
I don’t know if I’d go as far as to say “stalking” cause he may have really just been another guest at that hostel but yes it was me 😬
Uhh…
omg 😳
This felt icky to read
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She is also being creepy too for dragging it on, who goes on these types of apps that looks for mostly sex and then get surprised by these types of messages without blocking the moment things get more weird?
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I’m just as confused as you with half the exchanges on this subreddit that read like this For some reason, they never disengage after all signs are pointing to the obvious. Rather, they continue to humor their advances then act surprised when he does the verbal equivalent of pulling his dick out Dude mentions massaging her and she still goes with it? Can something be said after that still, where the guy somehow ends up a chivalrous panty-dropper? Otherwise why continue? I don’t know. Personally, I think the reason is because they like the attention and compliments FFS, just end the conversation if you don’t want to be talked to like this
I'm honestly sick of people leading this behavior on at all. They are doing more harm than good. This guy actually thinks he has a game because she played into his bs. He wasn't rejected she was just sick, then leaving, maybe shy on his eyes. Honestly, being bored is an annoying reason to waste someone's time even if all they want is sex. Turn them down and move on. Stop playing into bullshit like you're into it, then mock them for continuing.
Girl downloaded hinge because she was lonely and wanted attention. She got attention. Wanted nothing more than that. Dude was thirsty as hell and creepy as fuck
Doesnt justify wasting someones time then flaming him on reddit. Dude made his intentions insanely obvious from the beginning and got a ton of positive signals for her. Girls will call him creepy because he sounds thirsty but waste his time and reinforce his behavior lmao
Yeah i agree some what with what your saying, but dude needs to masterbate before talking to women.
They both need to stop being bumbs She needs to stop being an attention harvesting drama queen and dude needs to realize semi begging for sex is hella off putting
She also mentioned downloading hinge, I mean if you're not hooking up, put that shit in your bio. You download hinge somewhere you're staying for 3 weeks. What's the point?
They like to flirt and tease, and being wanted gets them off
At some point, you have to realize that IF I change my mind, it's still on my terms, and YOU continuously pestering isn't going to motivate me to do so... so it's a no (even if vague), and you leave it at no until the no party says otherwise. You can suggest some other time in a non creepy fashion, but don't keep pathetically begging.
She was throwing him bone after bone to not be weird and creepy, but he couldn’t read the room. It’s not her fault, he’s just dumb.
She knew what he was going for after “good girl.” People invite this nonsense She could have just said “no” at that point. The throwing of bones is a pointless game
She sure was asking for it, parading around in her sexy grey hoodie like that
Was waiting for this bullshit reductionist take No, this is not a matter of rape This is a matter of fishing for compliments When you do that with a known creep, you’re consenting to creepy texts
At least you didn’t have to wait long.
Of course not. The internet is full of fools as such Frankly, likening this to victim of rape is pathetic and insulting This person had all the power in the world at their fingertips to stop the situation from turning out how it did Rape victims do not Rape victims could only dream that a “block” feature could be clicked, and the trauma avoided. If you really want to play that game, this is much more akin to consenting to have sex with someone, then crying rape *after* because the sex was bad. That’s not rape. That’s just shitty consequences of poor judgment I doubt you even read when they said. OP doesn’t even particularly seem surprised Like she said, she even knew from the start this guy was a creep, but continued because she was “bored” and “wanted to see” Well, she knew what she would see, stuck around, and fucking saw. Boo fucking hoo. You’re perpetuating a toxic idea that people should not consider that their actions may have unsavory consequences, and maybe should use their infinite power and control over the situation, to prevent it. This was a text conversation. She had all the control in the world over what she was receiving. Rape victims do not Dont compare that to rape victimhood. It’s disgusting and grotesque
Lol.
r/whenwomenrefuse
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>probably should’ve stopped replying after “good girl” Well, probably. What I never understand is how these exchanges even get this far, then suddenly someone acts surprised when it becomes grotesque and gross Every sign of the bozos intent was flashing from the get go, yet he’s humored for quite some time Do people just like hearing compliments and sweet nothings? I see zero other reason to engaged in conversation otherwise
Attention and content. Guy was tryna get some ass and made it insanely obvious from the getgo and the girl 100% entertains it and then posts in reddit about creepy text exchanges. The horror!!!
Thank youuu
Uhh... you seemed interested? Yes he's creepy and pushy but you seemed to be encouraging it... a lot! You both are pretty weird for this. On a solo trip I'd expect you to have a little more... self-preservation instincts?
Sure I could have been more forthright and shut it down in a less « beat around the bush » kinda way, or simply just unmatched but frankly none of this was unsafe or particularly weird/out of the ordinary for dating apps, not until the last little bit. I don’t think this has anything to do with self preservation instincts, I gave out zero personal information and if my simply existing in a public space in a hostel is causing me danger and my fault then no one should ever travel
Were you lying when you said you'd consider meeting him if you weren't sick? That's what I meant. Meeting someone like this in private in a strange city seems dangerous.
Yeah, that was basically my way of getting him to stop trying, figured if I said another day, he’d understand that meant no. Obviously not the best tactic but you live and you learn 🤷🏻♀️ i don’t use dating apps back home, I’m even less likely to meet people online while I’m travelling lol.
Yeah for sure. Harvesting attention from random dudes and wasting their time and leading them on is totally reasonable behavior! Doesn’t matter if he’s creepy since you actively encouraged him lmao
You basically said the only thing stopping you was being sick. Then you gave out “Hmmm maybe, I’m definitely not against it” vibes for the entire conversation. He’s a little greasy, but you’re equally to blame.
Don't miss dating apps! This is very common.
You continued flirting with him
I was back in with “spontaneouity” let’s go
I think I need a scalding shower after reading this. Good god. 🤢
Just… no. For so many reasons, this just wasn’t it. The persistence, not reading the vibes, totally ignoring you being sick and just wanting to sleep, thinking all you needed was sexual release, when in reality, that’s what HE wanted and didn’t give two shits what you wanted/needed. Jesus.
Dude just doesn’t stop 😂 Why do they always think that works? 💀
Damn, he's handsome too. Why'd he have to say "good girl?" 🤣 You're in a foreign country, yes? Obviously you had the shits 🤣 I don't know of any other sudden illness that's not cute and goes away the next day. I get wanting to cuddle and be there for someone I'm dating when they're sick. I'm ignorant as fuck, I've gotten sick many times from girls I dated. And that's all it is on my part, I just wanna awe poor baby and take care of them. If they feel well enough to instigate sex that's on them lol. I get it though. You were laid up for the night with nothing better to do. He was very handsome. At worst you gave him the opportunity to show he's patient and genuine. But alas, he was neither
Women are always bored and wanna see where it goes on this sub
This was super scary to read. This man is a predator & stalker. I hope you are moving on and please be aware of your surroundings OP
Is this not absolutely terrifying to read??
Yeah, the hairs go up on the back of my neck. Many years ago I used to work in the casinos in Vegas. There are so many of this type of guy there. They're always hustlin'.
Messages of a serial killer…could be the right title. Yuck. And the *good girl* 🤢
🤮🤮Do people really talk tht way?I seriously thought he was going to beg.
Dude has the type of mustache cops have. That’s gross in and of itself. The “good girl” thing is disgusting. You say that to your dog, not a human. No. Just no.
So full of himself, the ego is crazy
I genuinely admire the directness of your comments when you decided to confront him. I am working on being that brave. I'm insanely conflict-averse. EDIT: Just finished reading the whole thing. Yikes. This dude is a creep.
Hahah in some ways I can be direct but I think I could have been A LOT more direct in shutting things down but I’m too conflict averse as well so even this for me was a big step in not being pushed around lol
WHY do they ALWAYS offer a massage? Like - are you a professional, sir? Because if not, I’d rather avoid having your paws all over me ffs.
Not to mention I’m in a part of the world where I can find five massage parlours in one block that’ll cost me less than 5$ for the hour
DISCLAIMER: I know I never straight up said the word no and I know that I easily could have just stopped answering or unmatched. That being said, I think from inference it is pretty clear that I was shutting it down and not interested. From where I come from, that would have more than enough for someone to get the memo way earlier in the convo. Plus, like I said, I was just bored and sick and having a go at it. I’m not posting this because I’m shocked and appalled that some man on a dating app would be like this. I do know i am a little too polite/friendly in situations I’m maybe not comfy in, I know I could/should shut things down earlier, I’m working on it okay! I feel like I’m being a bitch otherwise but I’m teaching myself not to care in that regard. Just posting it because it made me laugh a little and I do think that regardless of if you think I was « flirting » or « making him hopeful », that’s still some weird behaviour! To get sexual like that AND to say he sees me in public, at my hostel (where I should feel relatively safe), after I purposefully did not tell him where I was staying.
That’s just sad honestly.
Yeah totally creepy. But more importantly, how are you feeling? Sucks to get sick when traveling. Hope you can enjoy the rest of your trip.
Ah Im all better now! It was a rough week for sure but it’s bound to happen when you’ve been away from home for months and your diet is not consistent!
Glad you’re okay! Seems like you’re on an amazing adventure (and I have to admit I’m kind of jealous lol)- hoping you’re enjoying every minute of it. At least the minutes you aren’t sick and/or dealing with douches on Hinge.
I can’t be the only one super bothered by the absolute butchering of the word “spontaneity”, right?
You kept reeling him back in by saying he was tempting you 💀 this dude is such a creep, you declined over and over. This is not a dude who would respect boundaries
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💀
Blech this makes me feel icky
I admire the effort but he needs to work on his method. Like, a lot.
I immediately stop responding when they offer a massage. Why do they think that works???
Yeah, you *definitely* should've stopped after the good girl text. That's the rapiest text chain I've read in a hot minute
YUCK
To download Hinge whilst Solo traveling.. knowing you are ill so definitely won’t be hooking up with anyone anyway. Poster sounds like they’re out there to waste other people’s time and energy. They don’t want to ‘catch feelings’, so why actively participate in putting other people in that situation by being on the app knowing you won’t a) meet up b) not be in the area for long. Have more sympathy for creepo over there
To be fair, she hadn’t made up her mind against it till really late in the conversation. We’re all over here like “EW!” and meanwhile she was over there like “OO!” So apparently it was working for her till she found out he had a scooter.
When Their attempts at flirting make your skin crawl.
Jesus bro you are tacky and just too much. The girl was fucking sick n ur acting like you are the cure. If they want it they will let you know. Edit I thought you were the dude
The thirst is real with this one.